I'd Sooner Starve!

by Mark Sinclair

THE HILARIOUS UK NUMBER 1 "Hilarious!" "So true!" "Witty and informative" "Laugh out loud funny!" "Brilliant and funny" Have you ever eaten in a restaurant? Have you ever wondered why the waiter was surly? Why the salad was limp? The Soup cold? Ever thought the owners looked like they didn’t know what they were doing? Ever thought you could do better ... ever wanted to quit your job...? ‘I’d Sooner Starve’ is the amazing true story of one man's quest to escape his monotonous nine-to-five existence and open a charming delicatessen and restaurant in a delightful market town. With honesty, humour and breathtaking naïveté, it records his steep learning curve, radical lifestyle change and the immediate revelation that the customer is not always right! Amidst tales of bulimia, public menstruation, endless abuse and hilarious customer encounters, this eye-opening story unveils what happens after you walk into the boss and “I quit!” ‘I’d Sooner Starve’ is a shockingly comical tale of culinary highs, customer lows and one woman's unhealthy fixation with thigh-warmed Stilton… ‘An absolute hoot!’ ~ Anonymous celebrity chef ‘This hits the nail on the head so much I can't believe it! So much so, I can't possibly put my name to it!’~ UK chef ‘I am delighted that Mark has written this book. Maybe now people will believe me when I tell them the stories!’ ~ Matt, co-owner I'd Sooner Starve - the book the celebrity chefs were too afraid to endorse!

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor

190 pages, Kindle Edition

First published November 9, 2011

Reviews

[Susie Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

“I’d Sooner Starve“, by Mark Sinclair is about a council employee who decides he’d rather be a delicatessen/restaurant owner, his sole qualification being his ability to make a quiche without a recipe. Opening during the winter and serving only cold meals showed a certain misunderstanding of his market, and the student two-ring oven wasn’t really adequate for the shift to hot meals. The author readily accepts that many of his problems were of his own making, and I had a strong feeling that he was far from being a “people” person. He hated his customers. Not only did they force him into entirely changing his ideas of the type of food he wished to serve, they complained, blagged, carped and criticised endlessly. I hated them too.

I found his vitriolic rages hysterically funny, couldn’t put this book down and had tears streaming down my face. Whether all the stories are true, I can’t say, but fact very often is stranger than fiction, so it’s quite possible that the customer who preferred her cheese warmed really did stick it up her skirt. The book is full of similar anecdotes about the idiosyncratic behaviour of Mr and Mrs Middle England. It is only at the very end that Sinclair adopts a serious note, comparing the waste of food in the developed world with the terrible poverty in which too many people still live. I’ll definitely read this one again – but not in a public place. It’s just too funny.

[Arnie Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome. This book is really very funny and eye-opening. I gasped as many times as I laughed. Brilliant from start to finish. Recommended for anyone who has been a customer - or served one!

[Beth White · Rating 5 out of 5]

I absolutely devoured this book through many outbursts of laughter and “look at this bit” moments to my long suffering husband. This book is made up of several anecdotes of the author’s experiences as a delicatessen and cafe/restaurant owner. Many of these are hard to believe they actually happened with the abismal attitude and behaviour of humanity. As hilarious as many of the stories are, it’s sobering to realise that they are based on experiences and people actually behaved and behave in that way. Mind blowing. This was exactly the light read I needed in this insane time we are going through right now where there are too many reasons to feel anxious and low. This book is one more reason to laugh out loud and just fully relax. Thank you Mark Sinclair for this absolute gem!

[Rod Glenn · Rating 5 out of 5]

An absolutely hilarious true story about one man deciding to quit the day job and follow his dream of opening up a deli in a quaint market town. What ensues is nothing short of shocking and hilarious in equal measures - more so because it is a true story. For anyone who has worked in the service industry and had to deal with awkward customers this is a must read. Brilliant for everyone else too of course.

[Phill B · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this brilliant book, it's a funny tale of one man's journey through the world of new business. And his interactions with the most absurd and annoying customers. Once I started reading, I couldn't put it down. Highly recommended

[Paul · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found myself laughing out loud at some of the stories in this book. Worth reading for the cheese warming story alone.

[Eileen Williams · Rating 2 out of 5]

Moaner of the century

The customers moaned and whined. So did the author. It was not an enjoyable read. Quite a few times I considered abandoning it. I kept willing that it would get better but that wasn't to be.

[Beryl Sowter · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'd sooner starve than go in any establishment that the writer of this book owns.
I've worked with the public and you do come across some very awkward people. But he does an awful lot of moaning and is deeply insincere.
He obviously doesn't know how to handle people.

[Ruth · Rating 2 out of 5]

c2011. The title says it all really. I have always thought that serving the general public must be incredibly hard whether you own the business or not. The experiences relayed in the book started off as funny but then became, in my mind, very bitter. Unsurprisingly, of course. There was also a tone of entitlement running throughout the book. It was a Kindle freebie so I have nothing to complain about but it is a sad state of affairs when there were no nice customers or people (other than the cheese rep). But perhaps it is easier to remember the bad rather than the good. Unfortunately, I don't think any of the normal crew would enjoy the read. "A man who wasn't even moderately grateful for the extra mile we'd gone. You don't have to like a gesture to appreciate it. No "thank you". No acknowledgment of what we'd done. Just gone: leaving the door wide open. What a gimp. Oh yeah - Happy New Year."

[Darth · Rating 4 out of 5]

The awful customers make my blood boil! Fortunately, the author's writing made me laugh out loud. I absolutely agree with the author on the issue of food waste. I ALWAYS pack whatever is leftover at the table, even the bread in the bread basket. I do my best not to waste food. As I was reading the final chapters on how much food those customers waste, a crazy idea popped into my head. What if there's a restaurant that have a giant TV that plays videos of hungry people around the world? And there are mini TVs at each table playing the same thing. Perhaps that would help with the food waste a little?

[Jeremy Lao · Rating 4 out of 5]

Its a colourful recount of the author's entrepreneurship, experience in the service industry, and the life of an amateur yet professional chef. I think everyone should read this to appreciate the lengths that caring service industry workers have to endure to make a living. While the story humorously recounts some horrid experiences and the pitfalls, it also demonstrates the importance of only going into a business loaded with foresight, expertise, and knowledge.

[Nathan · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was an enjoyable, if sometimes repetitive, insight into this blokes venture into becoming a restaurant owner. Funny in parts, with the odd requests and behaviors of some of his customers. I had to feel sorry for him as my worst nightmare would be to have to work with the general public. Although when I was reading the book it was easy to read and get into, it wasn't a book that I was itching to pick up at any given moment.

[John Conway · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant. The laughs don't stop coming. After reading this, if you survive without expiring, you will: (i) never open a deli; (ii) wonder why anyone would open a deli; (iii) always be curteous to staff in shops and restaurants; (iv) never be too demanding of staff again; (v) be wary of people warming cheese on their thighs; (iv) look at your fellow human beings and feel slightly disappointed with them; (vii) look forward to the the next offering from Mark Sinclair.

[Lorraine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a very easy book to read and so down to earth, I do empathise with all you had to put up with over the four years of running the deli and restaurant ... You just can't please most of the general public , I really enjoyed your book and experiences it certainly made me laugh :-)

[Kevin Rourke · Rating 3 out of 5]

If your job involves dealing a lot in Customer Service with the public. This book is right up your street. Some really good anecdotes that sound a little too familiar where i work (at a train station)I enjoyed this book.

[Taryn · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting to read about the industry and goes a long way to put off any romantic ideas potential deli owners have. Good to see it from the independent supplier's point of view too, but needless today I won't be selling up to open shop!

[Amanda Wilson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hilarious, made me actually laugh out loud

[Darren Keighley · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a caterer I can really relate to this book and laughed at most of what he wrote as I have been in most of these situations myself.
Funny read.

[Angela · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very funny light-hearted book that I really enjoyed reading.

[Vasco · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very good

[Elizabeth Toon · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book. Well written, funny and easy to read. I do enjoy autobiographies.

[Roisin · Rating 4 out of 5]

very funny