In the Hands of an Angry G-d

by Claude Hamesh

"For you shall not prostrate yourself before another god, because the Lord, Whose Name is "Jealous One," is a jealous G-d."

- Exodus 34:14

Aharon, worried when Moses doesn't return from Mount Sinai, commits one of the biggest sins he can and forges the Golden Calf. However, things take an unexpected turn when the Lord comes looking for retribution.

Genres: Erotica, Queer, Mythology, Gay, LGBT, Novella, Religion

35 pages, Unknown Binding

First published April 13, 2023

Reviews

[Chelsea · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wot in the ungodly clit-dick-tentacle-prostate-massaging loving fuck did I just read? 🤣

This is not a novella, it’s barely a story, it’s more a fanfic excerpt or just some words on a page for a little while… horny horny words.

But like….. it was unholy 🙏🏼

The “my little priest” 🥵🥵🥵 r u kidding me?
Why is priests getting railed so hot? 🥵

There’s maybe more to this than my lil pea brain can understand, but I’m not sure 🤷🏻‍♀️

[Mx. T *Chaotic Reader* · Rating 5 out of 5]

G-d is gay af and I'm all for it.

[Linn · Rating 1 out of 5]

Queer erotic religious dark romance/ horror is my happy place. Sadly, this gave me exactly nothing. The novella wastes its own time for 20ish pages, that should have been spent building yearning and want, and erotic tension. What I got was clumsily written world building instead. The sex part was fine, but since it lacked in set up, it fell somewhat flat there too. I would have given it 3 Stars, maybe, if not for

❌ spelling errors & missing words in sentences
❌ punctuation errors: this - is not the correct em dash to use; the correct em dash is —
❌ using numbers in text, sometimes writing them out. pick one—although usually the consensus is to write numbers out
❌ use of very modern language in a historical/ mythological setting. like wdym God calls Aharon his fuck toy (direct quote) and why does everyone in this novella sound like they could have crawled out from a 2020 mafia romance 😭😭 this was immersion breaking as fuck.

404 Error: editor and reliable beta readers not found. I promise your artistic integrity won’t crumble if someone helps you put commas where they belong. If anything, refusing to even run a spellcheck feels like a weird badge of honor. The novella might be untouched by AI, but unfortunately it's also untouched by syntax.

[Lauren · Rating 5 out of 5]

Breathtaking and mouth watering religious retelling. As someone who is unfamiliar with Judaism and is not well-versed in biblical stories, I went into this story excited to see the authors interpretation of a story I was unfamiliar with, and hoped to be able to follow without prior knowledge. Their writing kept the storyline clear to me while providing their own spin and I was entirely entranced. I especially loved the depiction of g-d as a not entirely humanoid being, and Aharon's fixation with prostration as a sexual device felt fitting for someone so devoted to worship. Excited to read more from this author in the future!

[Jun · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was already gay for God, but I guess it could always get worse /pos

Claude's writing makes you feel absolutely immersed in Aharon's experience. Lyrical, erotic, blasphemous and devout. I can't wait to see what they write next.

[arin · Rating 5 out of 5]

if this was cake i would eat it with my fingers and make the filthiest sounds

[Lex · Rating 4 out of 5]

You've heard of religious horror. But have you heard of religious porn

[Revy · Rating 5 out of 5]

gorgeous short story about faith and getting railed by your god 10/10.

[K.C. Norton · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am extremely atheist and this book gave me some crazy cognitive dissonance while reading. I genuinely felt like I was going to get in trouble somehow while reading it. 😅 I stan a queer, trans and/or intersex G-d, though. The ultimate dom, I suppose.

This was well-written spicy Old Testament/Torah fanfiction (???) and if that’s what you’re in the market for, congratulations and welcome!

[pineapple on pizza · Rating 5 out of 5]

I want to fuck G-d now.

[Mona · Rating 4 out of 5]

*insert Fleabag quote about fucking God*

[Rachel Elizabeth · Rating 4 out of 5]

Good G-d they fuck

[Ladz · Rating 5 out of 5]

Content warning: explicit sex, religious guilt, sexualization of religion, ritual animal sacrifice, blood, humiliation, teratophilia, fantasy genitals

This is a quick read that’s essentially, as Hamesh puts it in the notes, “canon divergent fanfiction” of the Torah. It centers Aharon, guilty of idolatry, and the way G-d takes him on his burning desire for absolution.

It’s a really hot seventy or so pages with such lyrical prose, it really feels like it comes out of a religious text. The way Hamesh delineates between the voice talking in Aharon’s head versus speaking out loud really worked for me. There’s also a very clear reverence and love for the theology and, if I can say it, the source material. The characterization of both Aharon and his guilt proved really compelling, and I found myself completely absorbed in the time spent reading it.

Lyrical, reverent, and sexy, definitely recommend giving this novella a gander.

[Frannie · Rating 4 out of 5]

3.75 ⭐

Have you ever wondered if your daddy kink was really a G-d kink? Do you enjoy religious themes that take the repressed se*ual energy and dredge it into the open air? Then this short story is for you.

This was a nice story, I had a couple qualms about the writing (some awkward phrasing in spots but overall was pretty good). The 🌶️ was well written and the appendages were fun.

I enjoyed this and definitely recommend if you sometimes think "what would it be like to f**k G-d". Nice quick read.

[Chance · Rating 1 out of 5]

You know those books you put off reading just because you want to properly savor them? Well, this one was one of them for me. After seeing all the positive reviews I was quite excited to start reading this book. Unfortunately, what awaited me was a boring and poorly written erotica. The rest of the text just felt purely pretentious written for the sake of perhaps shocking with religious topics being written in this context. I have read many fanfictions better than this.

A complete waste of both time and money.

[julia · Rating 2 out of 5]

was a dark mode syk day victim and frankly a whore for religious themes

i wish i could do 2.5 because the first parts? brilliant. so well-written. absolutely gorgeous. then we got to the proper diddling and it’s like we throw all that beautiful language and sentence structure and pacing out of the window??? you can write sex in a beautiful way too please i am begging 😭

[Bill · Rating 4 out of 5]

The story centers on Aharon and G*d who Exodus calls the "Jealous One" and what might have happened after Moses came down from the mountain and destroyed the golden calf. I wish the story had gone further into what became of them all after they left the desert and reached Israel. I'd like to learn more about the author's take on this G*d. He certainly was jealous!

[Andria Gutierrez · Rating 2 out of 5]

If you know me and saw this, no you didn't.

I went into this blind. It was free and has been on my kindle a while. I popped into it since I was wanting a short read.

It is 50 pages and it is entirely homoerotic Jewish tentacle smut. Yes, you read that right. It was absolutely wild and I had to read the whole thing simply because it exists and shocked me.

[moonlight · Rating 5 out of 5]

Made me feel like I’m going to spend longer in gehinnom than I already will be. 5/5 stars

[ringo · Rating 5 out of 5]

B)

[Littlebookterror]

I genuinely enjoyed this but I also cannot tell how much or if I will think about it next week. Guess we'll see before I settle on a rating.

[ah'lexus billups · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oh wow , this book is spicy. I loved it, their were times I was blushing hard at my phone.

[Avery · Rating 4 out of 5]

I usually stick to more pagan 'gods and monsters' but I love a good God is non-binary/gender non-confirming story. It soothes something in my soul.

[Donyae Coles · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gorgeous prose.

[Jocelyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

G-d is gay hehe I actually kinda like it. I didn’t even know what I was reading at first. And I still don’t know what I read but I like it.

[Gem · Rating 4 out of 5]

I mean... I'm here for it!

[Jessica Frost · Rating 1 out of 5]

what did i just read?

[Ellie]

For research purposes only 😅

[lamb · Rating 5 out of 5]

very short, very dirty. i don't remember adding this to my TBR, but i feel as though i have committed at least 10 sins reading it. very good. 👍

[Syd Linders · Rating 5 out of 5]

You know in Fleabag when the therapist is like “Do you want to fuck the priest or fuck G-d?” This book says:

“Both, both is good”

(I can’t get the damn gif to work)