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Worth Fighting For: Love, Loss and Moving Forward
Wait a minute . . .
. . . there.
I made it to the next moment.
And that’s how you get through a bad moment of grief. You do it one moment at a time.
—from Worth Fighting For
LISA NIEMI and PATRICK SWAYZE were married for thirty-four years. They first met as teenagers at his mother’s dance studio—he was older and just a bit cocky; she was the beautiful waif who refused to worship the ground he walked on. Through the years their marriage strained under the pressures that many do, but it was always a uniquely passionate and creative partnership.
When they first exchanged vows, Lisa promised to be with her husband “till death do us part.” But how many couples stop and think about what that truly means? Worth Fighting For is a remarkably candid look at what losing a partner really entails—how to care for him or her, how to make it through each day without falling into despair, and how to move forward in the second half of your life when the person you spent the first half with is gone.
For the first time, Lisa Niemi Swayze shares the details of Patrick’s twenty-one-month battle with Stage IV pancreatic cancer, and she describes his last days, when she simply tried to keep him comfortable. She writes with heartbreaking honesty about her grief in the aftermath of Patrick’s death, and she openly discusses the challenges that the years without him have posed.
While this is an emotionally honest and un-flinching depiction of illness and loss, it is also a hopeful and life-affirming exploration of the power of the human spirit. Lisa shows that no matter how dark the prospect of another day may seem, there are always reserves of strength to call upon. She writes, “I tell you, I am a different person now. One who has been thrown into the fire and forged.” Like The Year of Magical Thinking and A Widow’s Story, this book is both a tribute to a marriage and a celebration of the healing power that each day holds, even in the most difficult of circumstances.
. . . there.
I made it to the next moment.
And that’s how you get through a bad moment of grief. You do it one moment at a time.
—from Worth Fighting For
LISA NIEMI and PATRICK SWAYZE were married for thirty-four years. They first met as teenagers at his mother’s dance studio—he was older and just a bit cocky; she was the beautiful waif who refused to worship the ground he walked on. Through the years their marriage strained under the pressures that many do, but it was always a uniquely passionate and creative partnership.
When they first exchanged vows, Lisa promised to be with her husband “till death do us part.” But how many couples stop and think about what that truly means? Worth Fighting For is a remarkably candid look at what losing a partner really entails—how to care for him or her, how to make it through each day without falling into despair, and how to move forward in the second half of your life when the person you spent the first half with is gone.
For the first time, Lisa Niemi Swayze shares the details of Patrick’s twenty-one-month battle with Stage IV pancreatic cancer, and she describes his last days, when she simply tried to keep him comfortable. She writes with heartbreaking honesty about her grief in the aftermath of Patrick’s death, and she openly discusses the challenges that the years without him have posed.
While this is an emotionally honest and un-flinching depiction of illness and loss, it is also a hopeful and life-affirming exploration of the power of the human spirit. Lisa shows that no matter how dark the prospect of another day may seem, there are always reserves of strength to call upon. She writes, “I tell you, I am a different person now. One who has been thrown into the fire and forged.” Like The Year of Magical Thinking and A Widow’s Story, this book is both a tribute to a marriage and a celebration of the healing power that each day holds, even in the most difficult of circumstances.
323 pages, Paperback
First published December 31, 2011
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About the author
Lisa Niemi Swayze
3 books32 followersLisa Anne Haapaniemi is an American actress and dancer. She was married to actor Patrick Swayze from 1975 until his death in 2009.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 174 reviews
November 15, 2021
I loved Patrick Swayze’s autobiography and felt like I had befriended these animal lovers. Ron & I bought several of their DVDs. When reading Patrick’s words in September 2020, my Mom had just ascended and our Son-like cat, Spirit felt unwell. It turned out to be cancer, for the first time in human or animal family. Not one for sad books, I arrived at a place to relate to them sharply. I would be gladder I read this sequel than I could know. “Worth Fighting For: Love, Loss, And Moving Forward” is a true sequel to “The Time Of My Life”. Patrick is alive in most of it!
Our Spirit went to Heaven in January 2021 and shockingly, our Marigold from kidney disease; just before I read Lisa Niemi’s story in July. I know in my soul to stay open to options. If we are meant to ascend, we just do. Doctors push ending lives artificially. We stand our ground but wish we had learned from Lisa two weeks sooner, a powerful retort. If medical issues arise, insist: “They are doing well. This is a treatable situation”. That wields confidence against raised eyebrows. Spirit & Marigold lived better than expected.
So did Patrick. It was not about celebrity. They kept track of Patrick’s care and declined doctors who spoke of “keeping him comfortable”, instead of fighting. He found the stamina to film the show “The Beast”, earning health insurance in the nick of time. He qualified for a research study, after retesting questionable results with another lab. He had a six-month prognosis. He gained two years.
The cat who slept beside him and last foal he saw born, ascended afterwards. Lisa had a rough year. Writing this book helped her. I will let her know she is also helping me.
Our Spirit went to Heaven in January 2021 and shockingly, our Marigold from kidney disease; just before I read Lisa Niemi’s story in July. I know in my soul to stay open to options. If we are meant to ascend, we just do. Doctors push ending lives artificially. We stand our ground but wish we had learned from Lisa two weeks sooner, a powerful retort. If medical issues arise, insist: “They are doing well. This is a treatable situation”. That wields confidence against raised eyebrows. Spirit & Marigold lived better than expected.
So did Patrick. It was not about celebrity. They kept track of Patrick’s care and declined doctors who spoke of “keeping him comfortable”, instead of fighting. He found the stamina to film the show “The Beast”, earning health insurance in the nick of time. He qualified for a research study, after retesting questionable results with another lab. He had a six-month prognosis. He gained two years.
The cat who slept beside him and last foal he saw born, ascended afterwards. Lisa had a rough year. Writing this book helped her. I will let her know she is also helping me.
March 2, 2012
Ever since I first found out Patrick Swayze had pancreatic cancer, I began to read everything that I could find about his life, and his illness. I totally enjoyed the book he and Lisa wrote: The Time of My Life, which told the story of their 34-year marriage, and touched somewhat of his battle with cancer. Having lost (2) loved ones to pancreatic cancer, I've witnessed first-hand how awful and just how hopeless everyone feels when a loved one gets the diagnosis Swayze received. Swayze's battle was a long and hard fought one, lasting (21) months from the time he was diagnosed with Stage IV in January of 2008. He died in September of 2009.
In this book, listed under biography / autobiography, Lisa Niemi Swayze details her husband's cancer battle, his debilitating on-going treatments, and constant changes in treatment plans when one plan was no longer working. We not only learn about what Patrick went through, but what it was like for Lisa, a dedicated caregiver, to watch the man she loved for 30+ years to become weaker and weaker and no longer even resemble the man she had spent her life with. The details about the illness were very painful to read at times, especially what his final weeks and days were like. When things were at their worst, she speaks of the strength that comes to you in situations like this that you never imagined you possessed. Her courage and commitment to him during his illness, is testament to the power of the human spirit.
Her story seems brutally honest, as she shares with the reader the happy times they had, surprises along the way, and other personal facts that I hadn't be aware of before. She also details the rocky periods of their marriage when her husband's drinking was out of control, they separated, and she was uncertain as to whether their marriage could even he saved. Especially touching was the epilogue where is writes about her life one year and eight months after Patrick's death; it seemed very heartfelt. This book is not for everyone, but I was very happy I read it.
"I tell you, I am a different person now. One who has been thrown into the fire and forged."
In this book, listed under biography / autobiography, Lisa Niemi Swayze details her husband's cancer battle, his debilitating on-going treatments, and constant changes in treatment plans when one plan was no longer working. We not only learn about what Patrick went through, but what it was like for Lisa, a dedicated caregiver, to watch the man she loved for 30+ years to become weaker and weaker and no longer even resemble the man she had spent her life with. The details about the illness were very painful to read at times, especially what his final weeks and days were like. When things were at their worst, she speaks of the strength that comes to you in situations like this that you never imagined you possessed. Her courage and commitment to him during his illness, is testament to the power of the human spirit.
Her story seems brutally honest, as she shares with the reader the happy times they had, surprises along the way, and other personal facts that I hadn't be aware of before. She also details the rocky periods of their marriage when her husband's drinking was out of control, they separated, and she was uncertain as to whether their marriage could even he saved. Especially touching was the epilogue where is writes about her life one year and eight months after Patrick's death; it seemed very heartfelt. This book is not for everyone, but I was very happy I read it.
"I tell you, I am a different person now. One who has been thrown into the fire and forged."
May 8, 2012
I found this book to be an amazing account of Lisa & Patrick's journey through this horrible, unforgiving disease. Having lost 2 close family members to this disease, this book helped me understand what they must have been going through with this disease, all of the treatments and medications, that in the end only made them comfortable.
Thank you Lisa for letting us into this very private time of yours and Patrick's life that made me have a giggle at some of the little stories, made me marvel at your strength and love, but also made me cry when it came to the part where Patrick lost his battle.
Having been a fan of Patrick Swayze's since I was a teenager, I was devastated when I found out that he had pancreatic cancer, once you hear those words cursed onto someone, you know that they can be treated for a certain amount of time, but you know that there is no cure, I only hope that someday there will be.
Thank you Lisa for letting us into this very private time of yours and Patrick's life that made me have a giggle at some of the little stories, made me marvel at your strength and love, but also made me cry when it came to the part where Patrick lost his battle.
Having been a fan of Patrick Swayze's since I was a teenager, I was devastated when I found out that he had pancreatic cancer, once you hear those words cursed onto someone, you know that they can be treated for a certain amount of time, but you know that there is no cure, I only hope that someday there will be.
January 2, 2013
Quite possibly the most mundane account of a life/relationship in print. Lisa Neime Swayze paints herself as the victim throughout this biography, as supposed to focusing on the plight of Patrick. This, leaving the reader frustrated and struggling to complete the book. A huge let down..
March 17, 2012
I picked this up because I loved Joan Didion's book on widowhood, The Year of Magical Thinking and because I was a 12-year-old girl who fell in love with Patrick Swayze in Dirty Dancing and then fell in love with his very real seeming marriage after reading Time of My Life the book he cowrote with his wife. Now, a few years after her husband's death, I wanted to make sure that Lisa Niemi was okay.
However, this book was primarily Lisa's story of Patrick's battle with cancer and all the living she tried to squeeze into this time with her partner of more than 30 years. Again, I was touched by their relationship and the way the two of them worked together to fight a cancer as lethal as pancreatic cancer. They managed to spend more quality time at their magical ranch in New Mexico and Patrick managed to shoot a whole season of The Beast, which gave Lisa her first opportunity to direct a TV episode. Plus there are plenty of details about living with pancreatic cancer, which was eye-opening.
If you don't mind a sad, but romantic story, this is a great read. At the same time I feel guilty for being so concerned with the lives of famous people. Still, the Swayzes are appealing to me because they seem to be so down to earth, despite Patrick's insane level of fame.
However, this book was primarily Lisa's story of Patrick's battle with cancer and all the living she tried to squeeze into this time with her partner of more than 30 years. Again, I was touched by their relationship and the way the two of them worked together to fight a cancer as lethal as pancreatic cancer. They managed to spend more quality time at their magical ranch in New Mexico and Patrick managed to shoot a whole season of The Beast, which gave Lisa her first opportunity to direct a TV episode. Plus there are plenty of details about living with pancreatic cancer, which was eye-opening.
If you don't mind a sad, but romantic story, this is a great read. At the same time I feel guilty for being so concerned with the lives of famous people. Still, the Swayzes are appealing to me because they seem to be so down to earth, despite Patrick's insane level of fame.
November 3, 2016
Firstly, I'd love to know WHY Goodreads have Lisa Niemi Swayze's surname spelled incorrectly. If anybody knows how to get them to fix it, please leave me a comment.
Secondly, it's important to know that this is not a book about Patrick Swayze's life and his relationship with Lisa. If that's what you want, you need to get 'The Time of my Life' which the couple wrote together whilst Patrick was receiving treatment for pancreatic cancer. Don't buy this book expecting to read cool stories about Patrick Swayze or you'll be very disappointed.
Lisa Niemi Swayze was married to Patrick for over 30 years. They had their ups and downs, she married him thinking 'Well we can always get divorced if it doesn't work out' and she even walked out on him when his drinking got too bad. But she stayed true to the term 'until death us do part' and was with him to the bitter end. Her book is a very honest account of what it's like to live with the man you love - faults and all - when it's almost inevitable that he's going to die. In this case, he lived a lot longer than anybody might have expected, and Lisa's tireless care and campaigning with doctors to not accept bad results and force them to put him into trials, undoubtedly contributed to his continued survival.
I read this book this week for the second time. First time round I loved it, second time round I could start to see why some people might pick holes in it. It's inevitably better to be rich and sick than to be poor and sick (especially in the USA) but most people won't have multiple homes and a personal jet that they can fly to appointments. That said, most 'normal' people won't be hounded by the paparazzi and read every week or two that they are already dead.
Lisa does get a bit OTT on the medical details at time to a degree that won't interest too many readers who are thankfully not in the situation of caring for a loved one with pancreatic cancer and may well be out of date quite quickly for those who are, but I think that's forgivable. She - like many of us - seems to deal with trauma but trying to 'fix' everything. I can certainly relate to that.
It's a sweet tale rich in little details of what makes life 'worth fighting for' even against all the odds. The birth of three new foals on their ranch, the introduction of a new Rhodesian Ridgeback puppy, good times with friends and family. I find it deeply inspiring. I perhaps scan-read a little more second time round so I didn't find my favourite passage where she explains that there was no point wasting time being 'sad' when time was so precious.
I hope readers won't find themselves in Lisa's shoes but I do think this book is well worth a read.
Secondly, it's important to know that this is not a book about Patrick Swayze's life and his relationship with Lisa. If that's what you want, you need to get 'The Time of my Life' which the couple wrote together whilst Patrick was receiving treatment for pancreatic cancer. Don't buy this book expecting to read cool stories about Patrick Swayze or you'll be very disappointed.
Lisa Niemi Swayze was married to Patrick for over 30 years. They had their ups and downs, she married him thinking 'Well we can always get divorced if it doesn't work out' and she even walked out on him when his drinking got too bad. But she stayed true to the term 'until death us do part' and was with him to the bitter end. Her book is a very honest account of what it's like to live with the man you love - faults and all - when it's almost inevitable that he's going to die. In this case, he lived a lot longer than anybody might have expected, and Lisa's tireless care and campaigning with doctors to not accept bad results and force them to put him into trials, undoubtedly contributed to his continued survival.
I read this book this week for the second time. First time round I loved it, second time round I could start to see why some people might pick holes in it. It's inevitably better to be rich and sick than to be poor and sick (especially in the USA) but most people won't have multiple homes and a personal jet that they can fly to appointments. That said, most 'normal' people won't be hounded by the paparazzi and read every week or two that they are already dead.
Lisa does get a bit OTT on the medical details at time to a degree that won't interest too many readers who are thankfully not in the situation of caring for a loved one with pancreatic cancer and may well be out of date quite quickly for those who are, but I think that's forgivable. She - like many of us - seems to deal with trauma but trying to 'fix' everything. I can certainly relate to that.
It's a sweet tale rich in little details of what makes life 'worth fighting for' even against all the odds. The birth of three new foals on their ranch, the introduction of a new Rhodesian Ridgeback puppy, good times with friends and family. I find it deeply inspiring. I perhaps scan-read a little more second time round so I didn't find my favourite passage where she explains that there was no point wasting time being 'sad' when time was so precious.
I hope readers won't find themselves in Lisa's shoes but I do think this book is well worth a read.
June 18, 2013
To women in my generation, Patrick Swayze is and always will be a beautiful looking actor who we all felt had genuine sincerity and a good heart.
After reading this book, I stopped seeing him as a celebrity and remembered that behind every famous actor is a human being who struggles with the same things we all do, celebrates in the same way we all do and has people surrounding them that love them in the very genuine and human way that we all have.
I think this book transcends celebrity. It is a beautiful story about two people who loved each other through good and bad for a lifetime and in the end I felt the pain of Lisa's loss as I have felt for my own.
A symbolic, haunting, joyful and always eloquently honest look at the process of letting go and the days thereafter.
I honestly recommend this to anyone. It touched me and I feel a little bit more refreshed by its existence that someone out there didn't sugar coat the reality of death and the grief and semblance of moving "forward" that follows after someone we love leaves this mortal coil.
After reading this book, I stopped seeing him as a celebrity and remembered that behind every famous actor is a human being who struggles with the same things we all do, celebrates in the same way we all do and has people surrounding them that love them in the very genuine and human way that we all have.
I think this book transcends celebrity. It is a beautiful story about two people who loved each other through good and bad for a lifetime and in the end I felt the pain of Lisa's loss as I have felt for my own.
A symbolic, haunting, joyful and always eloquently honest look at the process of letting go and the days thereafter.
I honestly recommend this to anyone. It touched me and I feel a little bit more refreshed by its existence that someone out there didn't sugar coat the reality of death and the grief and semblance of moving "forward" that follows after someone we love leaves this mortal coil.
January 25, 2015
An amazing book, that had me in tears a lot of it.
I loved the book Patrick wrote himself but this was just as good, being able to see Lisa's side to what Patrick shared, how she felt etc was special.
It was also really good to read about what he went through, it really brings it home how much he struggled and really tried to beat the cancer.
He really was an amazing, strong, brave man. A gentle man, one his father would be proud of.
Great book.
I loved the book Patrick wrote himself but this was just as good, being able to see Lisa's side to what Patrick shared, how she felt etc was special.
It was also really good to read about what he went through, it really brings it home how much he struggled and really tried to beat the cancer.
He really was an amazing, strong, brave man. A gentle man, one his father would be proud of.
Great book.
August 18, 2012
Very touching book. Had me crying like a baby. Patrick's wife wrote a very beautiful and factual book about her husbands brave battle with cancer. He would be proud.
February 27, 2020
Time taken to read - as able over 4 days
Pages - 336
Publisher - Atria Books
Source - Bought
Blurb from Goodreads
Wait a minute . . .
. . . there.
I made it to the next moment.
And that’s how you get through a bad moment of grief. You do it one moment at a time.
—from Worth Fighting For
My Review
This is Patrick Swayze's wife book about their time together, pre and post diagnosis, treatment and through his lie and when he passes on. Written almost in diary form, first person, some thoughts lifted and put in amongst the chapters. Each chapter has a photograph at the header. We learn about their relationship, married for over 30 years, how Lisa dealt with Hollywood/fame being mrs Swayze and the heartbreaking diagnosis and journey that followed.
You can tell this book has been a form of therapy, you can feel the emotion outpouring in some of the chapters. The parts dealing with the ins and outs, how Lisa got through each day being there for her husband, keeping on top of the treatments, keeping upbeat, being supportive and dealing with the press. The newspapers and how some people invaded their lives, the crass and disgusting behavior and blatant lies told to sell newspapers. Think of the person you love, dying, trying to keep positive, going through day to day and reading horrific lies, death predictions splashed all over the news. I really do feel for celebrities at times and their families, it is like people forget their are human, nothing is sacred and I felt so bad for Patrick's family and wife, especially at one point his poor wee mum. You can't even imagine trying to deal with a diagnosis like that and keep positive when lies and death speculation is spread all over the papers. Now it would be worse with online so popular and easily accessible.
I hope if nothing else this book makes people think about how exploited people can be all in the name of flogging some newspapers. I loved watching Patrick Swayze movies growing up, I remember being shocked to find out he sang She's Like The Wind - he has such a beautiful voice. I learned more about him as a person in this book and as with anyone, reading about anyone going through cancer - it is an emotive read. If you have lost someone to cancer or had someone diagnoses with it I think you will find some parts of the book hard hitting, if you haven't I think you will still find it an emotive read. 4/5 for me this time, after finishing this I find myself re watching some of the old movies - he was a fabulous actor (in my opinion) and from reading this book he seemed like a genuinely nice human being. I hope writing this brought his wife some peace, your heart goes out to anyone losing someone to cancer and these days it seems most of us have.
Pages - 336
Publisher - Atria Books
Source - Bought
Blurb from Goodreads
Wait a minute . . .
. . . there.
I made it to the next moment.
And that’s how you get through a bad moment of grief. You do it one moment at a time.
—from Worth Fighting For
My Review
This is Patrick Swayze's wife book about their time together, pre and post diagnosis, treatment and through his lie and when he passes on. Written almost in diary form, first person, some thoughts lifted and put in amongst the chapters. Each chapter has a photograph at the header. We learn about their relationship, married for over 30 years, how Lisa dealt with Hollywood/fame being mrs Swayze and the heartbreaking diagnosis and journey that followed.
You can tell this book has been a form of therapy, you can feel the emotion outpouring in some of the chapters. The parts dealing with the ins and outs, how Lisa got through each day being there for her husband, keeping on top of the treatments, keeping upbeat, being supportive and dealing with the press. The newspapers and how some people invaded their lives, the crass and disgusting behavior and blatant lies told to sell newspapers. Think of the person you love, dying, trying to keep positive, going through day to day and reading horrific lies, death predictions splashed all over the news. I really do feel for celebrities at times and their families, it is like people forget their are human, nothing is sacred and I felt so bad for Patrick's family and wife, especially at one point his poor wee mum. You can't even imagine trying to deal with a diagnosis like that and keep positive when lies and death speculation is spread all over the papers. Now it would be worse with online so popular and easily accessible.
I hope if nothing else this book makes people think about how exploited people can be all in the name of flogging some newspapers. I loved watching Patrick Swayze movies growing up, I remember being shocked to find out he sang She's Like The Wind - he has such a beautiful voice. I learned more about him as a person in this book and as with anyone, reading about anyone going through cancer - it is an emotive read. If you have lost someone to cancer or had someone diagnoses with it I think you will find some parts of the book hard hitting, if you haven't I think you will still find it an emotive read. 4/5 for me this time, after finishing this I find myself re watching some of the old movies - he was a fabulous actor (in my opinion) and from reading this book he seemed like a genuinely nice human being. I hope writing this brought his wife some peace, your heart goes out to anyone losing someone to cancer and these days it seems most of us have.
February 11, 2012
This was a very well written, thoughtful, and honest book. Lisa recounts all the ups and the downs from Patrick's diagnosis to his death and you feel every single emotion as though it is your own. The triumph when a new treatment works, the frustration with infections, the sadness and heartbreak at the end, but above all you feel the love that these two people shared for and with each other. At times it was difficult to read, not because it wasn't attention holding, but because of the topic at hand. I admit to putting off reading the last three or so chapters of the book for a day because I (obviously) knew how the story ends. The book was both beautiful and heartbreaking and absolutely worth reading.
February 28, 2013
This was a very honest account of how Lisa dealt with Patrick's illness & subsequent death. It was very Lisa oriented- which you would imagine, her being the author- and I felt was more about what Lisa went through as opposed to Buddy. The book shows her to be a very strong woman who almost ran herself into the ground for months and months to make Patrick her number 1 priority. The love between the two of them is hugely evident. It was heartbreaking reading what he had to endure. He seemed to take everything in his stride; his strong, passionate personality and unwavering will to live was his biggest weapon against the disease. I would have loved to have met him. There aren't many "celebs" who I can say I think are amazing human beings, but Patrick Swayze was definitely one of them.
August 30, 2013
Wow. What an amazing, heartbreaking story. I felt Lisa's determination, frustration, anger, love, hope, resolve and anguish as I worked my way through is book. Patrick Swayze has always a been a favorite - his beloved wife shares the real him with her readers in such an honest way that you can't help but admire (and miss) him more. I had no idea that he read his biography for the audio version -- I want to listen to it, but after reading Lisa's book, I think it might be hard to hear.
Obviously the story has only one incredibly sad ending, and it took me a while to get through this book, because I knew what was coming, but it was beautifully written, and well worth the tears that accompanied the ending.
Obviously the story has only one incredibly sad ending, and it took me a while to get through this book, because I knew what was coming, but it was beautifully written, and well worth the tears that accompanied the ending.
March 17, 2012
Being a widow myself and going through my husbands cancer like Lisa I was able to understand a lot of what they were going through!! It was a bit disheartening when she metioned they were able to 'buy'certain help although i had to laugh when she baulked at $40 thousand for some treatment! Otherwise a great book, Thanks Lisa for sharing with us your journey, as i say lots of similarity to the journey i had with my late husband. I only got 7 months, she got 21 months!! But not sure which i would prefer as it is such a hard task to watch someone get sick and die before your eyes!!!
September 14, 2013
"I want to live"
This line floored me and I will always remember. Lisa tells a honest story of what happened when the man she loved her whole life is diagnosed with a death sentence, and how they coped during this period.
I have read this book twice now since its release and have recommended it to my friends alike.
This line floored me and I will always remember. Lisa tells a honest story of what happened when the man she loved her whole life is diagnosed with a death sentence, and how they coped during this period.
I have read this book twice now since its release and have recommended it to my friends alike.
March 19, 2016
Much better written than I expected. The author writes in her own voice, which makes it very readable and parts of this book moved me to tears. Not all grief memoirs can do that, especially if the writing doesn't touch the emotions. Their marriage sounds like a lot of work, but LIsa Niemi Swayze, recently remarried BTW, come across, without bragging, as quite a woman.
January 12, 2014
This seems to be a really honest account of a struggle against cancer...told by the wife of Patrick Swayze. Its not sensationalist, its a love story but with an unhappy ending. It may tell you as much about love as it does about loss... worth a read.
August 5, 2024
The book I’m reading today is called "Worth Fighting For: Love, Loss and Moving Forward" by Lisa Niemi Swayze. She wrote this book in May of 2011, just a year later after buddy died. The book has been released in January of 2012. It has been 15 years since Buddy left this world, this September of 2024. Lisa grew up in Texas, U.S.A. Her background is Finnish and is the youngest child of 6. She grew up with her older brothers. She decided to write her memoir which she had described a great detailed, sad, but such a love story about the love of her life buddy for 34 years. I can say this, she is a strong, determined, loving and caring person that she fought for buddy’s life through thin and thick to the very end. They meet each other at early age when Lisa was buddy’s mother dance teacher. As a result, the best famous dirty dancing line that Patrick joked with his brother Donny “Nobody puts Patrick’s pancreas in a corner,”
March 17, 2012
I was a fan of Patrick Swayze and was interested to hear what his wife had to say.
There wasn't much new information in this book vs. what they wrote in his biography. This was her version of events from the time he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer until he died, and a little bit after.
It was not that well written with a lot of rambling and saying the same thing over and over. Up until he became very ill I was somewhat annoyed with repeatedly reading about how strong and determined he was, how long they'd been together, how evil the tabloids are, how much they loved each other and how much she did for him. I wish some of that had been edited out as it really only needed to be said once. I got it the first time.
Having said that, I cannot imagine watching your husband of 30+ years die, especially while also very much in the public eye. I was affected by his illness and death and I never even met the man! They seem to have been a loving couple, with typical marital problems (not caught up in the drama of Hollywood but also flawed, like everyone else) who were dealt a very harsh blow that took his life way too early. She was left to fend for herself and it was absolutely heartbreaking. By the time she described his final days, death and aftermath, I was sobbing uncontrollably.
She sounds like a strong woman who is a decent writer. I did like how honest she was about everything. She made them both sound very real and relatable.
I was absolutely appalled by one topic that was mentioned only very briefly in this book. Some chemo treatments can cost from $40K-$250K EACH. This is ABSURD. Generally chemo treatments are ordered as a course over several weeks. If each treatment is that expensive, and insurance doesn't cover it or the patient has no insurance they simply don't get treatment. The author obtained this information when Patrick was starting one of his last courses of chemo and was in between insurance policies. It all worked out fine for them (financially speaking...insurance did cover it). But there had been a woman who created a website for her own benefit to get into a clinical trial. She had set up the site to make it appear that Patrick Swayze was somehow involved in order to raise money for herself so she could pay for a new treatment. That struck me as beyond horrific and sad.
There wasn't much new information in this book vs. what they wrote in his biography. This was her version of events from the time he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer until he died, and a little bit after.
It was not that well written with a lot of rambling and saying the same thing over and over. Up until he became very ill I was somewhat annoyed with repeatedly reading about how strong and determined he was, how long they'd been together, how evil the tabloids are, how much they loved each other and how much she did for him. I wish some of that had been edited out as it really only needed to be said once. I got it the first time.
Having said that, I cannot imagine watching your husband of 30+ years die, especially while also very much in the public eye. I was affected by his illness and death and I never even met the man! They seem to have been a loving couple, with typical marital problems (not caught up in the drama of Hollywood but also flawed, like everyone else) who were dealt a very harsh blow that took his life way too early. She was left to fend for herself and it was absolutely heartbreaking. By the time she described his final days, death and aftermath, I was sobbing uncontrollably.
She sounds like a strong woman who is a decent writer. I did like how honest she was about everything. She made them both sound very real and relatable.
I was absolutely appalled by one topic that was mentioned only very briefly in this book. Some chemo treatments can cost from $40K-$250K EACH. This is ABSURD. Generally chemo treatments are ordered as a course over several weeks. If each treatment is that expensive, and insurance doesn't cover it or the patient has no insurance they simply don't get treatment. The author obtained this information when Patrick was starting one of his last courses of chemo and was in between insurance policies. It all worked out fine for them (financially speaking...insurance did cover it). But there had been a woman who created a website for her own benefit to get into a clinical trial. She had set up the site to make it appear that Patrick Swayze was somehow involved in order to raise money for herself so she could pay for a new treatment. That struck me as beyond horrific and sad.
December 30, 2017
I read part of this but just don't know if I can bring myself to finish it. I loved Patrick Swayze and his wife seems like an amazing woman but this book is so painful to me as my husband has been fighting cancer this last year and praise God is now in remission. This book is just too painful of a reminder of all that right now.
January 30, 2012
It's about Patrick Swayze so of course I had to read it :)
Lisa's take on Patrick's diagnosis, treatment and ultimate death is very moving, honest and real. This story was, of course, heartbreaking but very much worth your time.
"I want to live." - Patrick Swayze
Lisa's take on Patrick's diagnosis, treatment and ultimate death is very moving, honest and real. This story was, of course, heartbreaking but very much worth your time.
"I want to live." - Patrick Swayze
June 20, 2020
Książkę kupiłam w biedronce zachęcona okładką i opisem. Żona sławnego aktora Patricka Swayze opowiada o swoim małżeństwie,które przetrwało 34 lata, pasjach, które dzieliła wspólnie z mężem i o trudnym czasie i walce z chorobą na którą zachorował aktor.
Pani Lisa ma bardzo miłe nastawienie do czytelników. Czytając nie znalazłam żadnego wywyższania się co czasem jest typowe u niektórych sławnych. Bardzo mi się podobało jak Małżonkowie chronili swoją prywatność przed wścibskimi dziennikarzami. Początkowo książka była trochę nużąca, ale później jak usiadłam to czytałam dopóki nie doszłam do zakończenia. Poruszająca historia prawdziwej małżeńskiej miłości, która przeżyła swoje wzloty i upadki. Dobrze jest mieć kogoś bliskiego przy sobie. Piękne zdjęcia. Podziwiam Panią Lisę za napisanie tej książki. Wspomnienia do chwil gdzie widziała jak jej męża wyniszcza choroba na pewno nie należą do najłatwiejszych.Poruszający zapis miłości dwojga ludzi, którzy zostali ze sobą na dobre i na złe.
Pani Lisa ma bardzo miłe nastawienie do czytelników. Czytając nie znalazłam żadnego wywyższania się co czasem jest typowe u niektórych sławnych. Bardzo mi się podobało jak Małżonkowie chronili swoją prywatność przed wścibskimi dziennikarzami. Początkowo książka była trochę nużąca, ale później jak usiadłam to czytałam dopóki nie doszłam do zakończenia. Poruszająca historia prawdziwej małżeńskiej miłości, która przeżyła swoje wzloty i upadki. Dobrze jest mieć kogoś bliskiego przy sobie. Piękne zdjęcia. Podziwiam Panią Lisę za napisanie tej książki. Wspomnienia do chwil gdzie widziała jak jej męża wyniszcza choroba na pewno nie należą do najłatwiejszych.Poruszający zapis miłości dwojga ludzi, którzy zostali ze sobą na dobre i na złe.
May 1, 2022
I cannot express how amazing this book is. Lisa did a wonderful job writing and expressing her raw feelings of losing Patrick. It was interesting to get a first hand account of the struggles dealing with cancer from a spouse.
Highly recommend this book.
Highly recommend this book.
March 19, 2022
Read it with a box of tissues, it will definitely make you cry!
March 31, 2024
Absolutely brilliant. So touching and honest, a beautiful book
February 12, 2016
Required reading prior to reading this book: THE TIME OF MY LIFE by Patrick Swayze & Lisa Niemi
Required viewing too: DIRTY DANCING, GHOST, THE BEAST (TV series), and ONE LAST DANCE (ballet movie starring Patrick & Lisa, just so you can see how well they move together)
Done? Good, then you'll see why I was shedding a few tears when you reach the part of this book when Patrick Swayze takes his final breaths.
Cancer is on the mind these days as I have a family member dying of brain cancer, and I wanted to begin reading about what it's like. Hollywood tends to romanticize death and make it peaceful and beautiful -- and maybe it could be, but for the loved one that has cared and nursed that person, they are almost equally empty when they are left behind. Since I'm a Patrick Swayze fan and was familiar with his fight against pancreatic cancer, I figured that this book by his wife Lisa Niemi was a good starting point.
What I appreciated about this book was the care that Niemi took detailing those hardest days when she had to make the decision to DNR and bring Patrick back to their home to die. It's incredibly personal and intimate, and while I can't actually know what it's like until I go through something like that, I feel grateful in reading her account. Her epilogue was written about 2 years after Swayze's death and she unflinchingly describes her grief and how she is still grief-stricken, and that's comforting to learn that too.
Overall, I think this is a good book for those who have loved ones dying from cancer, or those who want to know more of the day-to-day life of those fighting aggressive cancers. The Swayzes were fortunate in that they were financially well-off and had opportunities from Patrick's celebrity status, but cancer strikes indiscriminately and the daily medical care that Lisa had to learn to do was staggering.
Required viewing too: DIRTY DANCING, GHOST, THE BEAST (TV series), and ONE LAST DANCE (ballet movie starring Patrick & Lisa, just so you can see how well they move together)
Done? Good, then you'll see why I was shedding a few tears when you reach the part of this book when Patrick Swayze takes his final breaths.
Cancer is on the mind these days as I have a family member dying of brain cancer, and I wanted to begin reading about what it's like. Hollywood tends to romanticize death and make it peaceful and beautiful -- and maybe it could be, but for the loved one that has cared and nursed that person, they are almost equally empty when they are left behind. Since I'm a Patrick Swayze fan and was familiar with his fight against pancreatic cancer, I figured that this book by his wife Lisa Niemi was a good starting point.
What I appreciated about this book was the care that Niemi took detailing those hardest days when she had to make the decision to DNR and bring Patrick back to their home to die. It's incredibly personal and intimate, and while I can't actually know what it's like until I go through something like that, I feel grateful in reading her account. Her epilogue was written about 2 years after Swayze's death and she unflinchingly describes her grief and how she is still grief-stricken, and that's comforting to learn that too.
Overall, I think this is a good book for those who have loved ones dying from cancer, or those who want to know more of the day-to-day life of those fighting aggressive cancers. The Swayzes were fortunate in that they were financially well-off and had opportunities from Patrick's celebrity status, but cancer strikes indiscriminately and the daily medical care that Lisa had to learn to do was staggering.
April 19, 2019
4.75 rounding to 5.0. WAH!!! No spoilers on this one, Patrick Swayze dies at the end of this book. I rarely cry reading books but man, did I bawl my face off last night. The entire book really is the story of Patrick's story (as told by his wife Lisa) of his struggle with pancreatic cancer - the treatments, the pain, the infections, and trying to continue with life in the midst of it all. Very detailed. There's a few pics in the book --- one in particular shows him very sick in bed. They both fought to the end. Patrick wanted to live.
Interesting to me there is no discussion about belief in a higher power, God, reincarnation etc. Lisa does talk about it once and says 'she doesn't know' what happens. So no hope of being reunited, or reborn, or continuing on after death. Sad.
I read (and reviewed) Patrick's book before this one -- I have been a Patrick Swayze fan since North & South. I googled and read online that Lisa has since re-married, and even auctioned off many of Patrick's things (the catalog is still viewable online). I didn't feel good about this. But reading of how Lisa cared for him and did much of the medical home care for Patrick, in some way she has earned being happy again. (not that she had to earn it).
Something else to note: I remember watching the Barbara Walters special when Patrick was alive where she interviewed him about his cancer struggle. He seemed angry during the special and I was disheartened by that interview because he seemed a little like a jerk. Lisa addresses this in her book and said she thought he was still in character - he had just finished filming the TV series The Beast and that character was a jerk in the script.
Recommended. *Sigh* Grab your tissue - the box.
Interesting to me there is no discussion about belief in a higher power, God, reincarnation etc. Lisa does talk about it once and says 'she doesn't know' what happens. So no hope of being reunited, or reborn, or continuing on after death. Sad.
I read (and reviewed) Patrick's book before this one -- I have been a Patrick Swayze fan since North & South. I googled and read online that Lisa has since re-married, and even auctioned off many of Patrick's things (the catalog is still viewable online). I didn't feel good about this. But reading of how Lisa cared for him and did much of the medical home care for Patrick, in some way she has earned being happy again. (not that she had to earn it).
Something else to note: I remember watching the Barbara Walters special when Patrick was alive where she interviewed him about his cancer struggle. He seemed angry during the special and I was disheartened by that interview because he seemed a little like a jerk. Lisa addresses this in her book and said she thought he was still in character - he had just finished filming the TV series The Beast and that character was a jerk in the script.
Recommended. *Sigh* Grab your tissue - the box.
November 1, 2012
Back in 2010 i read The Time of my Life by Patrick Swayze and his wife Lisa Niemi, I loved that book and when I saw that Patrick Swayze's wife Lisa had another book out, I knew that I had to read it too! It was a good book and had some parts that you just couldn't put down, mainly towards the end of the book. I wrote down a few of the quotes that I liked as well:
Words are incredibly poor substitutes for enormous feelings.
It’s so hard to know what to do when someone is ill. I was so afraid that I wouldn’t do the right thing that I did nothing at all. That’s changed now. I know what it’s like to be on the other side.
I realized how important it is to have good doctors. The good ones know what it takes and are not afraid to think outside the box. They are like scientists with bedside manners.
I can’t change the choices I’ve made. And I couldn’t make my husband live if he was not meant to. But what I can do is change the way I think about it. I can decide that I will go on. That every day is a new day and I get to choose the person I want to be. And regardless- sometimes you get the bear, and sometimes the bear gets you. There is no way you can stop feeling. And nobody ever said it was going to be easy.
Moments are like jewels to me. I gather them into my arms. And each of those jewels gives me the confidence to stand up and look death straight in the face.
And then he didn’t breathe anymore. It was ten o’clock in the morning. And he’d used that body. He’s used every last bit of it. That much was clear to me. He didn’t need it anymore. It was no good to him and he needed to leave it behind.
Words are incredibly poor substitutes for enormous feelings.
It’s so hard to know what to do when someone is ill. I was so afraid that I wouldn’t do the right thing that I did nothing at all. That’s changed now. I know what it’s like to be on the other side.
I realized how important it is to have good doctors. The good ones know what it takes and are not afraid to think outside the box. They are like scientists with bedside manners.
I can’t change the choices I’ve made. And I couldn’t make my husband live if he was not meant to. But what I can do is change the way I think about it. I can decide that I will go on. That every day is a new day and I get to choose the person I want to be. And regardless- sometimes you get the bear, and sometimes the bear gets you. There is no way you can stop feeling. And nobody ever said it was going to be easy.
Moments are like jewels to me. I gather them into my arms. And each of those jewels gives me the confidence to stand up and look death straight in the face.
And then he didn’t breathe anymore. It was ten o’clock in the morning. And he’d used that body. He’s used every last bit of it. That much was clear to me. He didn’t need it anymore. It was no good to him and he needed to leave it behind.
March 10, 2013
See this review on 1776books.net...
http://1776books.blogspot.com/2012/01...
Patrick Swayze. For my generation, he was Johnny Castle who was angry that Baby was in the corner. He was the oldest brother in The Outsiders, which started the career of so many actors of our time. He competed with Chris Farley in the Chippendale dance off on Saturday Night Live. He was larger than life, a darn good actor, and from what we could see, an all-around great guy.
Lisa Niemi and Patrick Swayze were married for thirty-four years. This was a lifetime considering that nowadays more than 50% of marriages end in divorce. 34 years in Hollywood? Practically unheard of. But this unlikely pairing of two dancers, one painfully shy and one a cocky hunk, made it...through good times and bad, through sickness and health. Patrick's life, as we all know, was cut far too short from pancreatic cancer. Worth Fighting For: Love, Loss, and Moving Forward, by Lisa Niemi Swayze, is their story of this journey through the unknown.
There is a blurb on the cover from Barbara Walters. It reads, "You will be the better for reading this book." There is something about Ms. Swayze's writing that reads so utterly honest. At times, she is laugh-out-loud funny and at other times she is heartbreakingly raw. At no time does she mince words. You will marvel at their strength, admire their courage, and revel in their love story.
MY RATING - 5
http://1776books.blogspot.com/2012/01...
Patrick Swayze. For my generation, he was Johnny Castle who was angry that Baby was in the corner. He was the oldest brother in The Outsiders, which started the career of so many actors of our time. He competed with Chris Farley in the Chippendale dance off on Saturday Night Live. He was larger than life, a darn good actor, and from what we could see, an all-around great guy.
Lisa Niemi and Patrick Swayze were married for thirty-four years. This was a lifetime considering that nowadays more than 50% of marriages end in divorce. 34 years in Hollywood? Practically unheard of. But this unlikely pairing of two dancers, one painfully shy and one a cocky hunk, made it...through good times and bad, through sickness and health. Patrick's life, as we all know, was cut far too short from pancreatic cancer. Worth Fighting For: Love, Loss, and Moving Forward, by Lisa Niemi Swayze, is their story of this journey through the unknown.
There is a blurb on the cover from Barbara Walters. It reads, "You will be the better for reading this book." There is something about Ms. Swayze's writing that reads so utterly honest. At times, she is laugh-out-loud funny and at other times she is heartbreakingly raw. At no time does she mince words. You will marvel at their strength, admire their courage, and revel in their love story.
MY RATING - 5
October 22, 2012
Lisa , I hope you check your reviews from time to time. I want you to know your book was so honest. You didn't mince your words about the pain of losing someone. I am impressed with your honestly. That you didn't try to sugar coat it. 1 corinthians 15 : 26 describes death as an enemy check it out in any bible. If you want to know the truth about what the bible teaches about death talk with the Jehovah's Witnesses. They are the only ones that teach what the bible says. It can give you peace of mind to know that there is evidence that the bible gives about seeing our dead loved ones again. It isn't a some feel good flighty information either , but cold hard evidence. Although not popular in society if you wish to have some of the difficult questions about life anwsered they are the only ones that will show you from the bible the truth. Their website is www.jw.com of course it's up to you ultimately, but what do you have to lose to take time to investiagate it for yourself. Most people that do are shocked at what they see in the bible and how the churches teach the opposite of what it says. Many are angry too for having been lied to. Well, I couldn't let this opportunity to try to reach out to you go by or my conscience would of bothered me. thanks for sharing such a intimate time in your life. Your book was amazing.
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