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The Baggage Handler

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Martin White, editor of The Shallow Review of Books, likes his life as he likes his shallow. Living in purposeful near-isolation in the middle of a crowded city, he keeps his relationships superficial and his life uncomplicated. His deliberate avoidance of social potholes prompts his colleagues to turn to him for assistance handling their own life and relationship baggage, which only strengthens his resolve never to allow any of it into his life. He’s pretty happy, albeit hollow and empty.But then Kasia turns up. Young, Polish, focused on minding her own business, she neither invites, nor encourages Martin’s flailing attempts at romance, but he can’t help himself. For reasons that defy logic for an isolationist such as he, he falls for her, hard. Years of handling baggage have done nothing to equip him to handle his own however as he realizes with excruciating displays of ineptitude, again and again. He’s way out of his depth …Faced with a challenge by Rich, his more socially adept colleague, to ask Kasia out within a week or Rich will, Martin has no option but to open the doors to all the complexity of modern life and relationships as he re-emerges from the shadows.A twisted romantic comedy, written from the male perspective, The Baggage Handler is an acknowledgement that if you’re going to be serious about it, this love stuff is hard.

250 pages, Kindle Edition

First published January 11, 2012

78 people want to read

About the author

Colin Browne

2 books6 followers
I don't know where I'm from, but my best guess is that I'm South African though that's really a twist-of-fate rather than a birthright. Born in England, I moved to Belgium when I was two, South Africa when I was 12, Dubai when I was 25, back to South Africa when I was 31, London when I was 40 and these days I call Johannesburg home.

I've done some fun stuff. I helped start a successful business in South Africa which I still part-own and I spent a lot of years before that writing articles for magazines around the world.

My first attempt at a novel happened in 1995. It was laughable. My second happened once I'd got over myself, in 1999. Not a lot better. But since then I've made writing a big part of my life, putting my work out into the world to take it's own independent reviews.

Other authors talk about their awards and their accolades, so I suppose I ought to do that too. I won two white mice at a school tombola once. That's kind of it. My mum made me donate them to the school which is just as well because the cat would probably have eaten them anyway. He was a monster, that cat ...

Other than that, I'm just a guy who loves telling stories, loves language and respects both enough to know that if I'm going to ask readers to trust me with their time, I ought to do my best to make it worth their while.

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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
Profile Image for Nadine Rose Larter.
Author 1 book309 followers
June 26, 2012
It's scary when you have a book written by a friend on your bookshelf. To be honest - my pile of books written by people I know is getting bigger and I very seldom tend to it as I am a pure coward. Even if you don't know that friend very well, there definitely exists a bit of tension between yourself and this book that you feel kind of obligated to. I know in some worlds a five star rating for a friend is a given - and I do not disagree with this because I believe that completely unbridled and biased support for a friend is absolutely wonderful and it has its place in holding up the receiver of that support - but I sort of feel unable to offer that kind of support in the book world because it is a world so close to my heart. If you were to create a video game or knit a scarf I might unashamedly brand you flawless - here I cannot do so without feeling like my integrity is being severely compromised. Now... it very unlikely that I will ever give a friend (or an acquaintance)a terrible review because for the most part I am not a soul-destroying art demon. What I do try to do is pull out the things that worked for me and focus on those. I also try to judge work for itself and not for what my particular tastes might be, which is not always very easy because I have such specific taste. For instance, I find YA fiction especially hard to judge because I don't think I relate to run-of-the-mill teenagers very well at all. In fact when I read these books I kind of tend to think of my step daughter and go "will she like this in a few years time?" and go from there. Anyway - the point is that I try to judge a book for what it is and where it fits in as far as the literary world is concerned and then I go from there. But for this book? This book I just gave it five stars because I enjoyed reading it very much. It is 100% *MY* genre for one (can we call it "blokelit"? I love blokelit!)When I give a book 5 stars it is simply because the book has my *it* requirement. I never know when I am going to find my *it* requirement and I have found it so seldom lately but this one just had *it* for me. Keep writing Colin Browne my dear friend. You will be up there with Tony Parsons and Nick Hornby and Mike Gayle in no time. I am so glad I finally got around to nodding along with your book :)
Profile Image for LindyLouMac.
1,015 reviews80 followers
August 31, 2012
My last read was a serious and somewhat sad one so I felt I needed a complete contrast. In choosing The Baggage Handler I certainly found something that made me smile, romance and relationships from a male point of view. Not yet to the standard of Nick Hornby or Tony Parsons but he could be one day as this is after all a début novel.

A pleasant enough easy read but it is not going to be a memorable one as I felt the storyline was all very superficial, never allowing the reader to really get to know the characters in depth. Although all of them were well depicted, there was so much more I would have liked to have known. I almost felt that I read the book too quickly because it was character rather than plot based and therefore a little shorter than it might have been.

I did not really like the protagonist Martin to start with but that may have been something to do with his work and the fact that he came over as such a pathetically weak man. A real loner he keeps everyone including his Mother at a distance whilst on the other hand he is the person that everyone seems to seek out for emotional advice. It is rather amusing though to think that his Shallow Book Reviews based on what books celebrities are reading rather than if a book is worthwhile or not, brings a certain media led trilogies popularity to mind!

The reader soon realises that despite Martin's isolated and simple uncomplicated life style when it comes to relationships he is happy in his own way. At least until he meets Kasia, a young pretty Polish work colleague, that he finds himself attracted to. He discovers that his social ineptitude makes it almost impossible for him to strike up a friendship with her, let alone a romantic connection. This is where the humour comes in as Martin's attempts at romance will have you laughing, yet also feeling sorry and angry for him all at the same time.

Martin discovers that falling in love is far from easy but as to if he is eventually successful or not, read the book to find out.

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410 reviews243 followers
January 29, 2018
"Certainly No 'Shallow Review' Of 'The Baggage Handler' From Fiction Books!"

It didn't take long to recognise that to read this book I would have to be quite broad-minded, as being written by a man, conversing predominantly with other men, it was suitably replete with what I would describe as mens `locker-room' humour, innuendo and language. In the overall context of the story though, I didn't find this overtly offensive or overused.

This was certainly a character based novel rather than plot based, as the story itself was an easy uncomplicated one, which left Colin with plenty of scope to enhance the content with some excellent characterisations which grew in depth during the course of the book, with even the background characters taking on some important and relevant roles of their own.

This, coupled with some excellent dialogue, (much of it making me cringe with embarassment at its ineptitude on Martin's part), together with some tastefully executed humorous exchanges, particularly between Martin and Kasia, made `The Baggage Handler' fun to read. I found myself alternating between frustration and sorrow at the depths of Martin's inability to communicate other than on a totally superficial level, with wanting to shout and lash out at him for his utterly wimpish and at times downright callous behaviour.

First of all I had to get used to the idea that there was a complete role reversal in this story, which meant that Martin's reactions came across as almost feminine and submissive, whereas Kasia was definitely in charge of the situation throughout, until she decided that enough was enough and Martin needed to step up to the mark if he was in any way serious about a relationship with her.

In Martin we superficially see a shallow, lonely and excessively defensive character, who is only best able to communicate with those outside contacts over whom he feels he is able to exert some modicum of control. Surprisingly this `shallowness' has brought him some success in his career, albeit a career which many would find quiet distasteful. This success has also had some quite surprising side effects, as he is now treated as an inhouse `agony aunt' by his colleagues, although whether they are laughing with him or at him, is a debatable point. I got the impression that whilst Martin is outwardly laughing with people, inwardly he is crying out for help and becoming increasingly isolationist and withdrawn.

As the story progresses it is easy to see why Martin may be quite as bad as he is at communicating. Whilst he comes from a family with an excellent career pedigree, communication skills as a family unit are almost non-existent. It would seem that he has never had a true father/son relationship with his father, to whom winning is the `be all and end all' of everything, whilst he has a love/hate relationship with his overbearing, overpowering and domineering mother. Basically, Martin has never been able to meet, yet alone exceed, their expectations of him, leaving him underconfident and acting like a man with the weight of the world on his shoulders.

He is unable to cope with rejection and after having been unceremoniously `dumped' by his one true love, has decided that the only way not to get hurt again, is not to get close enough to anyone to allow that situation to arise. This strategy only serves to make him appear a cold and distant character who seems to have no feelings, therefore leaving him even more open to being hurt, however unintentionally, by friends and colleagues who do not understand this strange behaviour.

To a perplexed Kasia, it appears that Martin is completely uninterested and unconcerned that she may have problems of her own and despite her giving him all the chances in the world to be completely open and honest with each other, she decides that she is not going to be able to make the breakthrough necessary, to move the relationship off of first base.

Several people try to offer Martin advice on how to turn things around with Kasia, although it is eventually the combined efforts of three relative strangers, unknown to each other, who bring him to his senses, helped in an odd way by his mostly absent mother, who does actually seem genuine in her concern for her son's happiness, yet unable to articulate it to him.

Martin learns some invaluable lessons from his mentors; you can separate your work from your personal life; this whole concept of love and `happy ever after' is a two way street; and that he just needs to `grow a pair' and accept that if things don't always go according to plan, then you have to take it on the chin and stop keep blaming the world and everyone else in it, for your woes .... and the outcome? .... well you'll just need to read the book and find out for yourself!

.......

The characters have been well developed through various defined stages and I could see them transitioning from chapter to chapter.

The plot, although simple and basic, is well developed and runs its full course, with a distinct beginning, middle and end, leaving no loose ends or hurried conclusions.

There was just the right amount of humour injected, so that situations remained controlled and focused, yet still left me smiling as I read.
Profile Image for Emma.
216 reviews189 followers
March 5, 2012
Martin is the writer of a successful column called The Shallow Review of Books. Instead of actually reading the books, he gives people what they want to hear: which celebrity is reading what. At work, Martin is known as the baggage handler; someone people go to when they want to share their problems and emotional baggage. Being the resident agony aunt has helped Martin realize that baggage is something he doesn’t need. Like his reviews, Martin’s life is shallow. When a new co-worker from Poland catches Martin’s eye, he finds himself wanting to make the effort to get to know her. Unfortunately, his attempts to get to know Kassia always seem to end in disaster. Does the shallow reviewer have what it takes to let someone get to know him on a deeper level?

Great for fans of the male equivalent to ‘chick lit,’ or writers like Jonathan Tropper, Nick Hornby and Matthew Norman. This book follows Londoner Martin, who writes very superficial reviews of books. Martin’s book reviews are a reflection of what his life is like: although he helps people with their problems, he does what he can so he doesn’t have any of his own. Who needs heartbreak and emotional baggage? Once Martin meets Kasia, it looks like he is the once who is in need of advice. This humorous depiction of romance from the male perspective was honest and quite fun to read. Martin has only been in love once but things didn’t end well. Now, he doesn’t like to get too invested in people to prevent himself from getting hurt. While sometimes watching him make a mess of things was frustrating, he was loveable overall. Some of the secondary characters were quite funny and there was, of course, Kasia, Martin’s love interest. In most books and movies, I feel like the main character falls in love too quickly. While this happened with The Baggage Handler, I still liked their relationship (when Martin wasn’t making a mess of things) and could see why he liked her. While these was lots of humour and this book was easy to enjoy, the pacing felt a bit off midway through and I wish there had been more subplots, instead of so much focus on Martin winning over Kasia. All in all, this was a fun book with a very satisfying ending.

3.5/5
Profile Image for Lisa.
500 reviews75 followers
April 16, 2012
I was initially drawn to this book after reading (and loving) Domestic Violets by Matthew Norman and really enjoying the male perspective on love. This book had been compared to it so I was intrigued.

Martin is a likeable character and his backwardness was charming to me. When he fell for Kasia, he fell hard and wholeheartedly. He was trying the best he knew how and I began rooting for him right away. Kasia, on the other hand, had her own issues and made him work for every inch of ground he was to make towards her. Most of the time, Martin would take one step forward and two steps back. In the many times that he tried to make headway with her, I felt Kasia was being too hard on him, but that made him try just that much harder.

The tribulations that Martin went through to win Kasia's love were sometimes funny and sometimes just plain sad. There were times I just shook my head. Ironically, Martin soon became the one seeking advice because, clearly, nothing that he did was working. Being the Baggage Handler and solving other peoples' problems did not prepare or help him in his own life. Along with his neighbor, Rupert, I also enjoyed the character of Isabel, Martin's mother, who would visit from France. Their back and forth bantering was comical and Browne's genius at making her a successful lawyer only made their conversations more combative, but in an insightful way.

All in all, THE BAGGAGE HANDLER is an entertaining read and I did enjoy Martin's character. I truly wanted him to win the girl. That said, near the end, I was starting to grow weary of the push and pull from Kasia, even though she was reacting to Martin's sometimes moronic moves. Poor guy, he just didn't know better. There is a definite message in the story though: No matter how good you think you are at giving other people advice, it doesn't necessarily make you equipped to handle obstacles that appear in your own life. As a debut novel I think THE BAGGAGE HANDLER was a success and I think Colin Browne has a unique writing style that will grow and be better with each new book. He is someone I will be on the lookout for in the future.
1 review
March 4, 2012
I read the Baggage Handler because the author suggested I read it. Usually I read crime fiction, mystery and lots of non-fiction publications, and haven't read a "romance" book for a long time. It took a while for me adjust to the plot, I kept wondering when the murder would take place. This book is not the usual romance book.
I don’t think that Martin is unusual when it comes to trying to get the attention of ones we desire, some of us too, have been known to behave awkwardly and do weird stuff. The story is written with humour and I loved the nicknames of the characters. The plot is simple but the story is interesting. I could never guess what Martin or Kasia’s next move would be and I was routing for Martin all the way. I related more to Martin, the anti-social loner soul in a big city and Kasia, for me, was a bit too “sensible” and not very spontaneous and nobody is perfect Kasia! I do think that, ultimately, she would be good for Martin, I think she helped him to think more deeply and act less selfishly. Her sincerity and thoughtful purpose was a good counter balance to his blasé approach to his work and his relationships. Her history turned out to be very interesting. I liked her more and more as the book went on. I really enjoyed the great characters, Martin’s Mom and the crazy neighbor.
The Baggage Handler was also interesting to me as a comment on society and working life in the city. London, this centre of the world, home to and gateway for many immigrants from everywhere and many immigrants from Eastern Europe. I enjoyed that the story did observe this and remarked on attitude and stereotyping that does tend to happen.
I look forward to Colin’s next book.
1 review
Read
April 10, 2012
I thoroughly enjoyed reading The Baggage Handler. From a reading point of view, I found it easy to read and I could identify with the tone and language of the book. It had a light hearted, witty humour. I thought the characters were well worked, and very different from each other, and you always felt as though you could have met any one of them in your own life.
The story line was nice and simple, you wanted Martin to take his foot out of his mouth and make head way with the girl of his dreams but at times felt that he was too foolish and Kasia too sensible. It had a wonderfully romantic ending and I found myself wanting to know where they went from there. Im looking forward to reading more from Colin Browne.
1 review
January 31, 2012
I read the baggage handler while I was on holiday and got so absorbed in Martins adventures I could hardly put it down.

Martin White may think he has all the answers, but when Kasia turns up he realises he is as hopeless (if not more so) than most the people who are constantly asking for his advice. He does his best to win the lovely Kasia over but he learns that sometimes life and love, just aren't that easy. There are many twists and turns which produce some hysterical, and occasionally embarrassing, results.

An excellent first novel from Mr Browne, I look forward to the next one!
Profile Image for Richard Mulholland.
Author 6 books67 followers
February 24, 2012
I really loved this book. It was chickfic for dudes. It took me a few chapters to start relating to Martin, the protagonist, but once you're in, you're in. I also think I may be in love with Kasia.

Highly recommended, Nick Hornsby, move over!
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