Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse

by Phyllis Diller, Richard Buskin

"From housewife to humorist, Phyllis Diller has been making millions laugh for five decades with her groundbreaking comedy, blazing a trail for comediennes during the fifties and sixties. She achieved this by poking fun at her own looks and frustrating life as a bored, ignored, and inept housewife. Yet while the routine broke new ground and opened the doors to subsequent generations of female standups, it also served as a form of self-therapy amid a life steeped in tragedy and turmoil." "Like a Lampshade in a Whorehouse is Phyllis Diller's own story about the struggle and the pain behind the comedy and the her Depression-era adolescence; her marriage to a chronically unemployed first husband; the desperate attempts to stave off poverty as a professional comic while raising five children; the disastrous club engagements that coincided with homelessness and separation from her young family; and the problems that clouded her stage and screen success when a second marriage unraveled because of her new spouse's alcoholism and inner demons." Diller also describes her separate careers as an artist and as a piano soloist with symphony orchestras; her failed attempts to become a Playboy centerfold; and her outspoken attitude toward her extensive plastic surgery that earned her a special award from the American Academy of Cosmetic Surgery.

Genres: Nonfiction, Biography, Humor, Biography Memoir, Comedy, Autobiography, Memoir

288 pages, Hardcover

First published February 17, 2005

About the author

Phyllis Diller was a Golden Globe-nominated American comedienne considered to be one of the pioneers of female stand-up comedy. She created a stage character persona that was a wild-haired, eccentrically-dressed housewife who made jokes about a fictional husband named "Fang" while smoking from a long cigarette holder. Another distinct characteristic is her cackling laugh, one of the best-recognized in comedy. Diller is given credit for opening the doors for the stand-up comedy field to women such as Rita Rudner, Totie Fields, Joan Rivers, Lily Tomlin, Sandra Bernhard, Joy Behar, Rosie O'Donnell and Roseanne Barr.

Reviews

[Giddy Girlie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought this second-hand with an inscription from one man to another to celebrate their 12th anniversary. That alone was worth the price of admission.

Phyllis Diller is an incredibly funny and interesting lady and this is a warts-and-all memoir of her trials and tribulations -- she's not holding ANYTHING back. I admire that a great deal and I especially appreciate that she maintains her humor even now, despite the difficulties that she's been through. Being married to a schizophrenic alcoholic and raising 5 children (one of whom is also schizophrenic), living in dire poverty and making a comedy routine of it, the shuttling across the country while often being forced to leave her children behind, remarrying to a closeted gay man, the difficulties of rising fame and deteriorating relationships -- it's all there and yet there is not a single "woe is me" moment to be found. She's an incredibly positive lady who deserves a lifetime achievement award just for making it through that crazy gauntlet alive!

She's one of those people I'd love to have lunch with someday, just in case you're wondering.

[Jennie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I really didn't expect this book to be sad and upsetting. But here we are.

Diller has major body issues that she remedies by joyfully undergoing multiple plastic surgeries, prioritizes fame and the famous over her children, makes light of her abusive husband, and has lots of slightly racist, homophobic, and sexist wisdoms to impart!

[James · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fascinating look at the life of the First Lady of Stand-Up - why she did it, what it was like working in what was very much a man's world, the truth about her husband Fang, and how she turned her "brand" into a life long career.

[Sara · Rating 4 out of 5]

With a title like Like A Lampshade in a Whorehouse, how can you go wrong??

Phyllis Diller was a comedian that I discovered while watching the Dean Martin Celebrity Roasts, and the minute I saw her, I knew I needed to know more.

This autobiography was extremely entertaining and surprisingly inspirational. She had some very dark spots in her life, but she used her comedy as therapy. She had such a positive outlook on everything and she was a walking example of self-fulfilling prophesy. She worked hard and loved deeply. This was a woman to be admired.

The book was written with little bits of her standup in the chapters- she had me in stitches at times. I really wish I could go back in time to see her live. Sadly, I cannot give her the round of applause that she deserves. However, I am glad that I picked this book up and hope to carry some of her optimism with me as I face my dark spots in life.

[Katie Bliss · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was OK - humor back then is just not like today's humor so I didn't find it as funny as I thought I would, Diller also seems to present herself as a saint living amongst sinners in most situations, and I just don't buy that. Her life was all about love and karma, but by the end of it, it seems like her kids and grandkids weren't even much in the picture for the most part, so I got the impression her life was more about self-love than anything. The part where her last husband is looking gray and sick, but Diller tries to take him with her anyway on a cruise where she's performing - then he keels over at the bag check, but she can't give up her gig, so she goes anyway, he stays behind and dies a day later...really? Where's all the love there?

[Catherine · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lot of these star bios follow similar threads, i.e., bad marriages, life on the road, drug and/or alcohol abuse, and other stars they've worked with. But I was impressed with Diller's honesty and positive attitude she expressed throughout her book. She describes reading a book as a young woman that aided in her finding a more positive path in her life, but she doesn't prosthyletize to her readers. She's lived a full live, filled with many tragic as well as happy events. Overall, I enjoyed this celebrity biography and would rate if highly for the genre.

[Holly · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's amazing how well her life turned out. She could have easily ended in obscurity, died in poverty, and or turned to substance abuse. Her first husband turned out to be chronically unemployed and eventually mentally ill. She became the sole supporter of their family - 5 children and the two of them. I was amazed at how long she stayed with him. Her second husband was a closeted alcoholic gay man. An inspiring book about her discovery of positive thinking and how it led her to be a groundbreaking stand up comic, and artist and a piano soloist.

[Amanda Ishtayeh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Like most biographies I am only interested in the childhood and formative years so this dragged on as I got toward the end. However, since she is from my hometown of Lima, it proved really interesting in the parts that referred to that. If you are a fan of true comedy...this is worth a look.

[Angie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Candid book about the comic’s life- a lot of tribulations and rough patches but she was always positive, funny, and happy. I appreciate that.

[Sally Kilpatrick]

In many ways, I think the strongest part of this book is the beginning. Childhood through Sherwood. I'm going to guess that the beginning was the strongest because Diller had had more time to process all of these things.

By the end, I was beginning to wonder if Diller could take responsibility for much of anything. Sherwood was awful. Warde was awful. This agent this. That person that. I say all of that to say...I perfectly expect my memoirs to proceed in a similar manner. Be forewarned. If you did me wrong, then I, like Diller, will remember.

Anyway, seeing the evolution of Diller as a comedian was fun. Finding out about her friendship with Bob Hope was interesting. Her honesty about plastic surgery was refreshing.

I read one review where the reader was mad that Diller went on a cruise when her last partner was obviously sick. It read heartless, but we all grieve in different ways. Also, Diller is from that generation where a contract is a contract. After later reading how she left Stephanie's death to talk about her pets, I'm going to guess she simply didn't like to dwell on painful memories. A little odd.

In general, the last part of the book gets a little less clear. Even so, it's more than worth it to see how a woman made her way in a man's world and to read all of the jokes between sections.

[kevin stone · Rating 5 out of 5]

Raw self-exposite

Ms Diller gives us a look into her life, mind, and sense of self in this biography of a star. While her career is interesting, it's the woman, and her struggles that intrigue me. She is strong, yet fragile. Her self-image is that of one who finds much fault in others, while she imagines herself as the center of her successful universe. While she, undoubtedly, sees herself as an accomplished performer, her skill as a mother can be glimpsed by the way she speaks of her family. We often change our selected memories to fit our failures into our life story, with us as the unappreciated hero/heroine. The vail is light, worn and shabby. She replaced her faith in God for
faith in herself. She was a funny woman, but it saddens
Me to see how self- involved
she was. God bless the family
she left behind.

[Gary Beck Dallaghan · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an amazing read. This book peeked into the life of Phyllis Diller in such a raw and unfettered way. She really did not hold back talking about her life struggles and her own quirks that led to some of the struggles. Through it all, she held fast and firm to hope for an amazing life filled with love. What's best about the book are the deliberate inclusions of some of her stand-up one-liners. They were comedic gold and made me laugh out loud. What a great book and great memories of one of the all time greats of comedy.

[Cynthia Bemis Abrams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Given her imprint on women in comedy worldwide, it's amazing how little is written or known about Phyllis Diller. I read this conducting research for my podcast, Advanced TV Herstory. Diller's book does more than her peers of the pioneer generation of women TV comics, Carol Burnett, Joan Rivers and Totie Fields, of documenting her rise and relationships.

Her writing and recall makes this a worthwhile read. And her candor is most appreciated.

[Carolyn Beach · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was looking for a biography of Charles Dickens, and this one was nearby. I hadn't thought of Phyllis Diller for ages, but I remembered her from tv and remembered also how amused my Dad was by her humor. It was an interesting book, but for a funny lady, she had a pretty sad life, it seemed to me. It was a quick read however and brought back some memories.

[Stephanie Guinn · Rating 5 out of 5]

The title is an attention grabber! Once I pulled the book off the shelf and saw that it was about one of my favorite comedians, I happily read it! You have two choices when life flips you upside down-let it defeat you or take the lumps while focusing on the hilarity that can result from any situation. Thank you Ms. Diller for reminding me to laugh.

[Kris · Rating 3 out of 5]

My mom was friends with Phyllis Diller when they were in the same dorm at Bluffton college. Though Phyllis' jokes were cheap and her get up was tacky, she had a strong sense of who she was and what she wanted. She also maintained a positive attitude through some very tough life situations which may have been her greatest accomplishment.

[John Wood · Rating 5 out of 5]

Phyllis Diller became one of the early female comedians by combining wild hair, outlandish outfits, a bizarre laugh ( which she claims is genuine), and her ever-present wooden cigarette in a cigarette holder. She gives us a taste of her humor by telling us about her real life and the many characters she created, including her husband, Fang.

[Susan Krich · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book about her life was a total surprise.
Her life was not at all what I anticipated when I began this book.
It is not a list of her achievements as so many books about people in the entertainment industry are but rather her almost unbelievable and certainly interesting life story.

[Christina Wooff · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book.

I absolutely loved this book. I got to know more about one of my favorite comediennes, Phyllis Diller. He life was fascinating with both the ups and downs. If anyone wants to know more about her, read this book.

[Urangoo Enkhtuvshin · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was a log of events rather than a compelling storytelling autobiography. I really wanted to like it but her personality and wit just didn't get reflected. I didn't like how the book made her first husband such a villain with no actual evil deeds- he could've been just an introvert.

[Balloon Bruce · Rating 1 out of 5]

Couldn't finish it.

[Apryl McLean · Rating 3 out of 5]

Funny and I love funny.

[Gregg · Rating 5 out of 5]

Funny and like story telling the amazing life story of one of the stand-up comedy greats as told as only she can.

[Gail O'Connor · Rating 3 out of 5]

Her book was shocking in so many ways!
A must read if you enjoyed her as a comedian. Her life was really quite sad. Couldn't put the book down.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wonderful read, I always enjoyed watching her on T.V. when she was on.

[Dave · Rating 4 out of 5]

Funny and fun. I learned a lot about her life. She was quite a character in spite of her tough childhood.

[Holly Deitz · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not well written, but I'm glad I read it. I never knew much about her at all, but she had a fascinating life.

[Trudy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thoroughly enjoyable :)

[Seymour Glass · Rating 5 out of 5]

An hilarious and insightful account of the humble beginnings of America's first female stand-up comic.
I first heard of Phyllis Diller a few years ago when I stumbled across a radio show about her which featured lots of audio clips of her performances. I couldn't believe what I was hearing - they'd mostly been recorded in the 1950s and she was a housewife at the time yet she had such a mouth on her and spoke with such snarky scorn of her deadbeat husband Fang (whom the book reveals to be fictional). The line that stuck in my mind the most was delivered with fantastic mock anger: "I'm so flat chested, my friend told me to stuff my bra with Kleenex. I wish to hell she'd told me to take them out of the box!" She was so sharp, and so unforgiving, mostly towards herself and her own looks:
"I'm so goddam ugly, my own Ouija board told me to go to hell. One night a peeping Tom threw up on my windowsill." She speaks frankly and openly about the plastic surgery she had when her Hollywood career got underway but intersperses it with excerpts from her witty and harsh stage material, ("My plastic surgeon took one look at me and wanted to add a tail. He said my face looked like a bouquet of elbows.").

Most of the book is taken up detailing her life before she became famous, her marriage to the terrible Sherwood Diller and their chaotic home life with 5 kids before she finally decided to give comedy a shot at age 37 and discovered she'd found her niche. As her career goes on the book devolves more into Hollywood name-dropping and there's plenty of gossipy Beverly Hills moments to satisfy anyone looking for them. Having said that, she always keeps it entertaining and the book is written in a style that makes you feel as if you're sitting there in her giant California mansion with a cup of tea being told the whole thing from the lady herself.

I only just got round to reading this book, despite having bought it years ago. When Phyllis Diller passed away last summer, I reminded myself to get round to it and I can only recommend it to anyone who is a fan of hers or of humorous writing or vintage Hollywood stories. Immensely enjoyable.

[Jane · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed the book but found myself strangely dissatisfied. It is as though she skipped a pebble on the surface of a pond. In an interview I heard recently, she emphasized the importance of having no agenda. Yet at the same time she says that it is important that a comic have hostility. From where does that hostility originate? Everything is political and yet, given the era in which she worked, she seems strangely void of any feminist consciousness. How can this be? She had huge amounts of cosmetic surgery. She mentioned the fact that men can grow old gracefully, she, nevertheless expresses little anger about unfairness in that inequality. I suppose I was expecting more depth. There is more to this woman than is in this book. She confesses her denial about many things, which is honest. However, she may not be introspective enough to reveal the entire truth about herself or her effect of others around her.