Unspent Time

NoHope universe

by Graham Parke

Warning: reading this novel may make you more attractive to the opposite sex and elevate your random luck by about 9.332%*
(*These statements have not been evaluated by anyone of consequence.)


Such as the story of Kiala, whose aunt and caretaker disappears one day, leaving her as the sole Huntress to battle the giant octopi to feed her village. Or the revealing tale of Goki Feng Ho: the ancient Chinese art of decoding the meaning of car license plates. And the heartbreaking story of the man responsible for choosing the colors of the insides of your shoes. As he toils away in obscurity, his work impacts society in ways we’ll never fully comprehend. And let’s not forget the story behind Unspent Time itself, the metaphysical ramifications of which will leave the scientific community feeling mostly indifferent about it for decades to come…

Genres: Fantasy, Fiction, Anthologies

190 pages, Kindle Edition

First published February 27, 2012

About the author

Forewords Book of the Year winner, Kirkus Indie Best-Lister, EPIC, IBA, and NY Literary Magazine finalist, Graham Parke is responsible for a number of bewildering publications and has recently attempted to patent a self-folding map. He has been described as both a humanitarian and a pathological liar. Convincing evidence to support either allegation has yet to be produced.

The award winning "NoHope universe" series is his fiction debut.

Reviews

[Erika · Rating 5 out of 5]

I fell in love with Graham Parke when I read No Hope for Gomez, if you haven't read it I highly recommend you pick up a copy. I was giddy when another novel had come out. Unspent Time is a collection of cleverly witty short stories. I just absolutely love how genius his writing is, especially in this book because not only am I getting to know so many characters I also feel like I get to know the author as well. Graham Parke has a humorously dark side you just can't put the book down, and had me laughing out loud. Very enjoyable read and highly recommend this book.

[Amanda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I usually shy away from short stories but I will read anything written by Graham Parke...this collection of short stories included.
Unspent Time changed my view on how truly enjoyable the short story can be when handled properly. I loved the author's sense of humor and writing style in No Hope for Gomez! and was glad that it was present in this collection of short stories. I laughed out loud while reading quite a few of these stories and wondered what it said about my character that "It's Her Birthday After All!" was my favorite...hmm.
There were some very beautifully written stories in this collection as well. Stories that were sad, heartfelt, and made me think about them long after I read them.
I also loved the sections where Parke wrote about how certain stories came to be. Written in his own voice, I thought these were particularly funny.
If you liked No Hope for Gomez! you will love Unspent Time and if you haven't read either yet, do yourself a favor and check them out...you won't be sorry!

[Freda Mans-Labianca · Rating 3 out of 5]

These are short stories, I am sure fictional, from the interesting and hilarious mind of Graham Parke. Most of them I really enjoyed, and they left me thinking about them afterwards, and only one I wasn't crazy about, Goki Feng Ho. I loved Sunday Brunch, Favorite White Bones, What I figured Out So Far and It's Her Birthday, After All! Each was different, in its premise and even theme, but they didn't clash reading one after the other.
The one thing I really loved though, is after some stories the author tells you idea behind the tale, and it personalizes it more for the reader.
I think short story fans will like this one a lot.


3.5/5

[Wendy Hines · Rating 5 out of 5]

Unspent Time is a collection of short stories by No Hope For Gomez! author, Graham Parke. I really enjoyed Gomez, so I was very excited to delve into Unspent Time.

The stories range from very short (just a few pages) to about a handful. Each story is separate, meaning the characters do not inter-connect at all, which I loved. It was a breath of fresh air with each new story and I was able to put the book down when I needed to. (I'm known to stay up way past my bedtime to get to a stopping point in a book.)

I loved the story of Kiala, whom's aunt passes away and she has to take over the job of getting meat for her village. She has to slice off hunks of octopus tentacle and she doesn't have the training. With the help of a young cannibal, she tries to find her way.

I also enjoyed the story of the Carbon Copies! I had to laugh when I read this, but Parke touches on some real scientific and political issues in this short story. What if you woke up one morning and there was two of you? Crazy good stuff!

There are many other stories in this collection and I enjoyed every one of them. Each story is a tale of it's own with it's own characters, situation and goals. Graham has down a remarkable job and I know this is one book I can go back and read over and over and probably find something new. If you haven't read his work, I highly urge you to pick it up. Not only this delightful tome, but No Hope For Gomez! as well.

[Dina · Rating 3 out of 5]

3 1/2 stars (rounded down to 3 stars, because some stories were just too weird and made no sense at all)

As it happens in any collection of short stories, this book has very some good and some very bad entries. Overall, it was an enjoyable and sometimes funny read, but not up to par with Mr. Parke's debut novel - No Hope for Gomez!, which I absolutely loved.

I don't know how to write a proper review of this book - I guess I'm still confused by some of the things I've read - so I'll go straight to the tally:

The good:
- Sunday Brunch (5 stars)
- Carbon Copies (5 stars - my favorite of the bunch)
- Don't Look Over the Edge of the World (4 stars)
- The Hunted (4 stars)
- Discontinued (5 stars)
- Dear Damian (4 stars)
- Unspent Time (5 stars)

The bad:
- Why I Drink Liquid Explosives (1 star)
- What I Figured Out So Far (1 star)
- Lost Knock (2 stars)
- This is Not What it Looks Like (2 stars)

The so-so (3 stars):
- Goki Feng Ho
- Favorite White Bones
- Someone Called Me Sebastian
- It's Her Birthday, After All
- What You Should Know About My Toes
- Following the Khyserians
- Davenport, Actor
- The Interview
- What Makes People Interesting

[Tamera Lawrence · Rating 4 out of 5]

"Unspent Time Omnibus" is a wonderful collection of stories taken out of the creative mind of Graham Parke. With his highly adept imagination, Graham has written a series of ordinary stories with delightful characters and visible clarity. Graham follows up on his tales with insight into how he came up with the story line and his characters. His ideas come from images rolling around in his fertile mind, planting seeds, which grow to be harvested. Graham’s story of 'Carbon Copies' was one of my favorites with Maud1 and Maud2, two identical wives with a husband that needs to choose between them.

Graham Parke has a gift for creating quirky characters and bringing them to life. He managed to make decoding license plates sound interesting. I never would have guessed what Goki Feng Ho meant and would have never taken the time to find out in this lifetime. This author has a unique way of looking at life’s flaws and finding humorous ways to weave answers to the simplest questions. For instance in 'The Hunted' the question is asked, “Who is eating the liverwurst?” This ghostly tale is funny and makes perfect sense to my mind’s eye. What is even more hilarious is who or what is doing the haunting.

I enjoyed reading "Unspent Time Omnibus". It was different, unique and a lot of fun. Graham Parke is a wonderful author who dares to take the plunge into the 'what if'.

[Aubrey · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I received Graham Parke's Unspent Time in the mail, I think I almost scared our mailman because of my excitement--and it was not for nothing. This is my first time to read a book written by Parke and I must say, I was thoroughly entertained. Every story held a little surprise that made me shake my head in amusement.

Although I found Goki Feng Ho a little too hard to digest (particularly because I have the wonderful non-ability of not understanding license plates), all of Parke's short stories were definitely refreshing with a healthy dose of insanity. I absolutely loved them. My particular favorite was Someone Called Me Sebastian--perhaps I'll keep it in mind in case someone calls me a name other than my real name.

All in all, I give the book a vote of awesomeness--Kung Fu Panda style. It's a really good read, and I recommend it to anyone who'd love something wonderfully crazy. I was so glad that I won this book from Goodreads!

[Haley Mathiot · Rating 5 out of 5]

I fell in love with Graham Parke's writing when I read No Hope for Gomez (I've posted about Gomez plenty of times. I know I have.) so I jumped at the chance to read this collection of short stories. The summaries sounded just like Parke, and just like my kind of short story: surprising, well thought out, with a point that was both simple enough and poignant enough that it mattered to me, not so obvious that it feels like a sermon, but not so obscure that it takes months to figure out. The writing is witty and sarcastic at times, and serious at others, which makes for an altogether interesting and engaging read.

I wholeheartedly recommend Unspent Time to anyone who… well, likes to read and has a sense of humor. You will like these stories. I promise.

[Lina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book! I loved its originality and I loved its weirdness. I loved its (black at times) hilarity and its sentimentalism. Finally, a book full of ideas that have crossed people's minds, whether they be writers or not. I, personally, have caught myself thinking the most unbelievable things! It was a nice change and I know that some of the stories will stay with me. Now I can't wait to read "No Hope For Gomez"!

[Julie Wann · Rating 4 out of 5]

A quirky little off-beat book.

[Kayla Cox · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is full of unique and funny short stories, with a few serious stories to keep readers on their toes. It is one of a kind and very different from anything I've ever read before. My only complaint is that the eBook version was full of typos and needed to be edited better before publication.

[Aimeekay · Rating 5 out of 5]

I enjoyed all of the stories in this collection from Graham Parke.

The author's work is interesting and quirky. Some of the stories were less stories and more small scenes, less than even a page in length. But all were enjoyable in one way or another. Some of the stories even had comments from the author following them. I think these were great. They helped to give the reader a better insight into what the author was thinking while writing.
I'm going to review this one the same way I reviewed Apocrypha Sequence earlier this month. Just a few words about each story.

Sunday Brunch:

This was the first entry in the Unspent Time Omnibus. It was about a page. It was interesting and the ending was a twist.

Carbon Copies:

This one was a full story. I thought the story was really interesting. The way that the main character handled the 'carbon copies' in his life definitely kept me reading. I kinda figured out which copy was which, but seeing how the main character handled it was definitely drew me in.

Why I Drink Liquid Explosives:

Again this is another one that is less than a page, in fact it is only two paragraphs. It is more of a statement on modern airplane security issues than a story. It still however has a bite at the end. This one is more of a 'makes you think' type of thing, and I think it get's it's point across even in small amount of words.


Don't Look Over the Edge of the World:

This is another full length story. I was drawn into this one. I like the way the author at the beginning makes it seem to be something completely different than what it is. There are also quite a few parts that had me laughing. The only issue I have with this one is I wish there was more to it. I would love to find out more about the world that is created, as well as what happens to some of the characters. It doesn't end on a cliffie or anything, I just wish there was more to read.

Goki Feng Ho:

Okay this one was REALLY funny. Of course now I want to go actually try out the 'art' of Goki Feng Ho...

Favorite White Bones:

Again I expected something completely different from the beginning of this one. However it wasn't a bad twist and it was funny at the end.

What I Figured Out So Far:

This one is just a page, and is just a list of observations. However they are funny and worth the read.

Someone Called Me Sebastian:

An interesting take on a young man's outlook and his reactions to a pretty girl. It was interesting and quirky.


The Hunted:

This one was funny! I enjoyed it, the only issue with this one is it felt like it could have had a more complete ending. It just stopped. It kinda made sense how it ended, but I think there could have been more.

Discontinued:

This one is a bit confusing at first. By the end though it makes sense. It was a very sad story, did not see the ending that it came with coming.

It's Her Birthday, After All!:

OMG! This one is dark but sooo funny! I know people that I could see doing this and having the same excuses. The humor however is dark, not gory or scary, just dark.

What You Should Know About My Toes:

Again this one is also darkly humorous. I got a good chuckle out of it.

Following the Khyserians:

This one was one of those 'makes you think' kinda ones. It was interesting and I liked the main characters point of view. Again this is one of those that makes me want to read more about the world that the author created.

Davenport, Actor:

This one seems more like a clever tale you would read in a Hollywood memoir. It was interesting and amusing though, if short.

Lost Knock:

HAHAHAHA! I loved the twist at the end of this one. I wasn't sure what I expected but this wasn't it.

Dear Damian:

I wasn't sure about this one at first. It is a series of letters that are arranged out of order so it seems to bounce back at forth. But this was sooo touching and overall my favorite story in the whole book, even though it almost brought me to tears by the end of it. Definitely read this book if only for this story!

The Interview:

So tongue in cheek and sarcastic. Loved it!

Unspent Time:

Almost as good as Dear Damian. Very touching and makes you wonder what might have been and what might be.

What Makes People Interesting:

Amusing. Cute little tale about an 'interesting' person. I like to see how the author takes the most mundane thing and turn it into a likable story.

This is Not What it Looks Like:

Another one pager that while short, is extremely funny!


Overall this collection was interesting, touching and even laugh out loud funny. I definitely recommend picking it up.

[Grady · Rating 5 out of 5]

Warning: Graham Parke is a Contagious Entity

Every now and then along comes a writer whose skills are so polished and whose imagination is so expansive that even within the course of a collection of stories the reader grows obsessed to have more. For those fortunate enough to have enjoyed the pleasures of Parke's novel NO HOPE FOR GOMEZ (for those who haven't, get your hands and eyes and brain on it!) this collection UNSPENT TIME will continue to startle with Parke's ingenuity. It is not JUST the themes of his stories that are fascinatingly and refreshingly unique; it is the manner of telling these at time absurd or outrageous tales that keeps you glued to the page. Parke has that strength of proficiency to address the reader right in the middle of making a story progress, a trait that makes you feel that he has turned aside form his crating matrix to wink and share a joke with you.

For example, in WHAT MAKES PEOPLE INTERESTING Parke begins his tale about a man (for whom he assigns several monikers) whose life occupation is designing the color of the inside of shoes (I'm not making this up...) by stating `It is not uncommon for writers to have a keenly developed interest in their fellow man. For them to spend hours looking at people, listening to them, discovering all the little synchronicities and ambiguities that make them unique. All of it is precious information to the writer-brain. From the way people carry themselves to their wardrobe of choice to their hobbies and the friends that they keep. But I don't have that. Not in the least. In fact, I can't stand people. And there's so freaking many of them. They're like huge, overblown ants, crawling all over the world and getting in my way.' Now, how is that for starters on telling a story? Well, absolutely hilarious - and brave.

But on to content of this collections. There is a wildly hilarious story FAVORITE WHTE BONES about a pitiful planet with its own transportation and travel security problems that pokes Parke into a tale of an absurdly fat and loony man with multiple bags loaded with explosives insisting he get on a plane, etc etc. A story called DISCONTINUED examines the workplace, but it is the added on bit at the end that again slides Parke into the light as a writer. `This story' he writes, `has a bit of an odd history to it. It wasn't written in the usual way; most of my stories start from small ideas that grow as I write them up. They gather speed as characters and details are added. At a certain point they reach a critical mass and the final word count becomes apparent; it's a short story, it's a novelette, it's a novel. [This story] started as a stack of interconnected ideas that turned into a rather lengthy novel, which I condensed back down by extracting a single storyline The characters were tweaked, the plot altered, a short story remains....this is probably the most roundabout way of creating a short story I've ever used.' And after Parke's sharing of the process, go back and re-read the story and vaVoom! There is magic there. He does the same sort of thing with the terrific title stories and others. Reading Graham Parke is not only entertaining to the max, but it is also a study in self-parody and a term paper on the art of writing that is so strong that it becomes contagious. Patience. Wait for the next set. Graham Parke is bound to come up with a new one momentarily. Meanwhile, latch on to this artist. He'll take you places you never imagined!

Grady Harp

[Elizabeth A. · Rating 4 out of 5]

There's no question that author Graham Parke doesn't just march to the beat of his own drummer, dude's jitterbugging to a full orchestra playing a tune only he can hear. Anyone who's read his delightfully odd novel No Hope for Gomez! understands this. Fortunately for readers Parke is able to channel that mysterious and magical music in his head into his writing. The twenty short stories contained in his collection Unspent Time are a perfect reflection of Parke's unique brand of insanity, not to mention a great way to make his acquaintance if you've not already.

And to be sure, Parke oddities abound in Unspent Time. For example, did you realize that every license plate you see contains a hidden message of some sort? You would if you read "Goki Feng Ho," which explains the ancient Chinese art of decoding license plates. And while calling an exterminator to investigate the paranormal goings on in your house normally wouldn't seem like the best way to go about things, it makes perfect sense if, like the poor bloke in "The Hunted," your house is indeed haunted... by rats.

Perhaps the most classic example of Parke's wonderful weirdness is on display in "Carbon Copies," in which the world wakes up one morning to find approximately one fifth of the population has been perfectly replicated. A bonus in situations where brilliant scientists now have two of themselves to devote to solving the world's problems, not so much for people like our story's narrator who finds himself now married to Maude1 and Maude2. And what do insurance companies do? They only contracted to cover one person, so who is the "real" insured? Not to mention, can one copy collect unemployment if the other is working? It's quite the complicated, and clever, mess.

The real standouts of Unspent Time, however, are the stories where Parke dials down the insanity a bit, taking instead a more contemplative approach. "Dear Damian" is an intensely moving story presented in the form of emails of fatherly advice a dying man pre-writes for his young son to read as he grows up. "Discontinued" also deals with death, showing the absolutely devastating and disorienting consequences that result when one has someone close to them ripped away prematurely and unexpectedly. But it's the title story, "Unspent Time," that is unquestionably the gem of the collection. Everyone has had those moments where they've wondered what could have been, what life may have turned out like if a different decision had been made at a critical juncture, a different path taken. "Unspent Time" is an enchanting tale wherein people get the opportunity to follow up on those moments, to live out their lives's `unspent time' and see how things could have been.

The stories in Unspent Time range from bombastic and bizarre to profound and moving, and many of them are even further enhanced by notes from Parke following the story giving insight into where the idea for the story came from. And while it may be that not every story in the collection strikes your fancy, I guarantee there will be enough that do - and one or two that really connect - to ensure you won't be wasting time with Unspent Time.

[Paula · Rating 5 out of 5]

After the insane and hilarious ride Graham Parke takes you on, in "No Hope for Gomez!", one can't help but wonder what sort of bizarre contraption (found where regular folks store their brains) is capable of creating it.
Soon you find yourself "Googling" the writer, wanting to learn more about him, searching for more of his work: you simply must have another taste of his unique brand of "insanity", discovering along the way that the author himself, is as interesting as the stories his writes.
In "Unspent Times", Parke invites us on a journey through the inner workings of that creative tool of his, through a series of short stories. Filled with his addicting and bizarre sense of humor, the book also reveals Parke's unexpected "serious" side, surprising us with deeply sweet and touching tales ("Dear Damian", "Following the Khyserians", among others).
Above all, "Unspent Times" reinforces what we learned about the author from his first book: Parke needs to write. About anything and everything, all or nothing, but he needs to write. And we are damn glad he does it! Be it in short or long form, about otherworldly events or simple daily issues, Parke's take on whatever subject he decides to tackle definitely makes the reading worth while.

[Andrea Cambon · Rating 3 out of 5]

No Hope for Gomez! might have been just sheer chance, but after two books in a row I think I have officially become aGraham Parke´s fan.
This is a different kind of book, though. Not a novel, which is what I usually read. The book is a collection of short stories and its diversity is quite wide: some of them make you laugh out loud, some of them seem to be an exact reflection of what we think but don´t dare to say out loud, some of them are sci-fi and some of them emotional.
My top sories were: Favourite White Bones (what a great ending!), Sunday Brunch ( Just brilliant), What I figured out so far (i would like to reply, ´me too´), Discontinued, It's her birthday after all (I do confess to liking it!), Dear Damian (no comments needed).
I loved the fact that you could read the author's comments after some of the stories. In fact, there is one particular story -Unspent Time- in which I enjoyed the author´s comment more than the story itself!

[Tahlia Newland · Rating 5 out of 5]

Unspent Time is a collection of short stories and I loved it for its humour, originality and general craziness. If you have a prejudice against short stories, drop it and read this. It’s highly entertaining and the author’s commentary links the stories into a unified and satisfying whole.


Graham’s vibrant characters shine from the first page of each story. His sensitive portrayal hooks our empathy and makes them, and even their sometimes fantastical stories, very real. I love the way fantasy and reality play alongside each other in this collection, and like the best short stories, there’s more to them than just entertaining tales. For example, in the Goki Feng Ho story, a ridiculous system of decoding the meaning of car license plates takes on cultish overtones and makes us wonder at man-kind’s ability to find and defend meaning in all sorts of places.

I give this book 5 stars and add it to the Awesome Indies listing. I haven’t read No Hope for Gomez because it isn’t available on ebook, but if it’s anything like this, then I’d love to.

[Rose · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked up this book for two reasons. The first was because I sometimes get in the mood for short stories and the second was because I really liked the book cover (although I originally thought it was a person fishing for a giant octopus - after reading I found this wasn't exactly the case).

The stories are.....what's the right word.....weird, no that's not it but nonetheless true. Perhaps warped....close but still not quite right. OK, I've got it.....it's mind-bending. These seem to be random thoughts that have morphed into stories and I really liked them. It was a fun book where the laws of reality do not apply. You can check your common sense at the door and head on in.

[Claire · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's not often I give such high ratings to collections. Thankfully, in this instance there is only 1 contributing author and for me I think that made all the difference.

This collection opens with "Sunday Brunch" and at the end of this I roared with laughed and I knew I was in for a treat. Each story is different and sometimes strange but these are never a bad thing.

There are also notes from Graham throughout the book as well, shining some light on his motivation for some of these little nuggets.

IF you are looking for something a bit strange that often makes perfect sense... Read this book.

[Jess · Rating 3 out of 5]

There were stories I really loved & some, not so much. I love Parke's oddball sense of humor, but when he was more serious, it fell flat & was depressing to me. Coincidentally, I read Kurt Vonnegut's Monkey House just prior to this. I think Parke is on a par with KR, in an updated setting. This is quite a compliment.

[Gwen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Insanely hilarious!
A very diverse set of stories, each with an interesting setting and wonderfully original characters.
This thing will have you thinking for months after you've finished it. I loved every single story.

[Anne · Rating 3 out of 5]

Liked it and like subject matter of stories. Not as good as Gomez but worth reading. Easy reading.

[Awesome Indies Book Awards · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome Indies Book Awards is pleased to include UNSPENT TIME by GRAHAM PARKE in the library of Awesome Indies' Badge of Approval recipients.