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Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel: Ten Twisted Tales
From the author of Breathers<,/i>, Fated, and Lucky Bastard comes a collection of ten dark and humorous tales about extraterrestrial sex toys, a family of luck poachers, a group of professional guinea pigs, the immortal personifications of the Seven Deadly Sins, and a zombie gigolo. Just to name a few.
A zombie's lament --
Softland --
My ego is bigger than yours --
Dream girls --
Shooting monkeys in a barrel --
Captivity --
The Sodom and Gomorrah shore --
Homer's reprise --
Dr. Lullaby --
Zombie gigolo
A zombie's lament --
Softland --
My ego is bigger than yours --
Dream girls --
Shooting monkeys in a barrel --
Captivity --
The Sodom and Gomorrah shore --
Homer's reprise --
Dr. Lullaby --
Zombie gigolo
136 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 27, 2012
4 people are currently reading
173 people want to read
About the author
S.G. Browne
27 books438 followersS.G. Browne is the author of the novels Less Than Hero, Big Egos, Lucky Bastard, Fated, and Breathers, as well as the eBook short story collection Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel and the heartwarming holiday tale I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus. His new short story collection, Lost Creatures, blends fantasy, science fiction, dark comedy, and magical realism.
He's an ice cream connoisseur, Guinness aficionado, cat enthusiast, and a sucker for dark comedies. You can learn more about S.G. Browne and his writing at www.sgbrowne.com
He's an ice cream connoisseur, Guinness aficionado, cat enthusiast, and a sucker for dark comedies. You can learn more about S.G. Browne and his writing at www.sgbrowne.com
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
February 1, 2014
Totally mother-flippin' awesome! I have so thoroughly enjoyed everything by Browne, and this was no exception. I think the best parts are the commentaries Browne appends to each story explaining how inspiration struck. I found myself just as engaged with these 'sneak peeks' into the creative process as I did the stories themselves. Not to mention, a couple stories are being worked into novels, which almost makes me die with anticipation! All in all, a great, varied collection of stories that will have you laughing most of the time, gagging at others (maggots in assholes are NEVER a good sign).
June 15, 2012
REVIEW ALSO ON: http://bibliomantics.com/2012/04/13/s......
The collection opens with “A Zombie’s Lament” the short story which would later become Browne’s first published novel Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament. The tale follows a zombie who after returning to the world of the living finds himself on the fringes of society. His social security number is taken from him, he has no legal rights as one of the undead, and even his own family is disturbed by his presence. The work previously appeared in Zombies: Encounters with the Hungry Dead edited by John Skipp.
“Softland” continues with the trend of short stories that later became books this tale becoming Browne’s newest full length novel, Lucky Bastard OUT THIS TUESDAY! The short follows a family of luck poachers who steal luck from others. Luck comes in different forms, good and bad, soft to hard, and having the ability to take luck from someone is a hereditary trait. While stealing luck pays well, it doesn’t necessarily give you the best social life, forcing the poacher to move from place to place to not draw attention to oneself. You can read my full review of the ARC I received HERE.
My absolute favorite story in this collection is “My Ego is Bigger Than Yours”. It is- presumably- set in a future where people are able to buy a drug which replicates someone’s personality, called Egos. Sold for 10K if you want the ego of a celebrity (dead only to prevent confusion and fraud) or 15K if you want designer personalities for fictional characters like James Bond or Luke Skywalker. The premise is spectacular, and allows you to witness things like Hemingway and Faulkner fighting inside a cafe. Even better, Browne is working on crafting it into a novel called Big Egos. YAY!
Another spectacular story, “Dream Girls”is part science fiction and part fantasy with a morbid twist. In this world, there is a technology on the market called Dream Girls, which is a robot alien hybrid that can take the form of any woman the owner thinks of. Think morphing sex doll. Due to the invention of these, marriage rates have declined, Marilyn Monroe was murdered and Kennedy assassinated. As expected, Dream Boys didn’t work out as well because women want companionship versus random sexual encounters, but at least Catholic Priests are better off.
In “Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel” (this one’s amazing too!!!) a writer is suffering from a case of writer’s block when he meets a drug dealer who traffics words. Empty looking Ziploc bags full of words. They come in adjectives, cliches, you name it, and each set of words has its own unique smell. After inhaling the bag it temporarily cures writer’s block, but that doesn’t mean what you write is going to be any good. Fun, witty, AND implausible. All my favorite things in one neat little bundle.
“Captivity” is the shortest story of the short stories and is from the point of view of a shampoo bottle. It’s also very dark, graphic, and sad. Very very sad. So sad it will make you hope your shampoo isn’t sentient. PLEASE DON’T HAVE FEELINGS SHAMPOO!
This offshoot of his second published novel Fated, “The Sodom and Gomorrah Shore” is centered around the characters of Sloth and Gluttony and written in script format. Basically, it revolves around the personification of the seven deadly sins if they had their own reality show at the biblical destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Lots of fantasy and imagination stretching in this one. Browne even brings in Lot and his wife if you’re into biblical things and don’t think everything is blasphemous.
“Homer’s Reprise” is the only story not written in the third person and follows Odysseus. It’s also set in the future when Cerberus, Big Foot and the Loch Ness Monster are stuffed and on display in museums. Also Odysseus is immortal and in charge of protecting the beasts of the world. I’m not completely as good as I once was with my Greek mythology, so not 100% sure where it came from, but I like the concept. It also gives us insight into Browne’s writing process, and he tells us, “I’m a pantser. I write the same way Indiana Jones deal with Nazis and stolen artifacts: I’m making it up as I go.”
In another story bound for bookdom, AKA “Dr. Lullaby” a group of men who test prescription medicine before it goes public get super powers. These super powers, are side-effect related, i.e. may cause weight gain, drowsiness, and vomiting and the men who get them use their new found prowess for good. The main character also makes extra cash by allowing people to yell their frustrations at him. If I had a tougher skin it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Finally, there is “Zombie Gigolo” which was written for a gross out contest. It’s incredibly gross, almost too gross, probably due to the plot which centers around a zombie gigolo. He is himself a zombie and there’s lots of descriptive… Juiciness. Getting nauseous just thinking about it.
The collection opens with “A Zombie’s Lament” the short story which would later become Browne’s first published novel Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament. The tale follows a zombie who after returning to the world of the living finds himself on the fringes of society. His social security number is taken from him, he has no legal rights as one of the undead, and even his own family is disturbed by his presence. The work previously appeared in Zombies: Encounters with the Hungry Dead edited by John Skipp.
“Softland” continues with the trend of short stories that later became books this tale becoming Browne’s newest full length novel, Lucky Bastard OUT THIS TUESDAY! The short follows a family of luck poachers who steal luck from others. Luck comes in different forms, good and bad, soft to hard, and having the ability to take luck from someone is a hereditary trait. While stealing luck pays well, it doesn’t necessarily give you the best social life, forcing the poacher to move from place to place to not draw attention to oneself. You can read my full review of the ARC I received HERE.
My absolute favorite story in this collection is “My Ego is Bigger Than Yours”. It is- presumably- set in a future where people are able to buy a drug which replicates someone’s personality, called Egos. Sold for 10K if you want the ego of a celebrity (dead only to prevent confusion and fraud) or 15K if you want designer personalities for fictional characters like James Bond or Luke Skywalker. The premise is spectacular, and allows you to witness things like Hemingway and Faulkner fighting inside a cafe. Even better, Browne is working on crafting it into a novel called Big Egos. YAY!
Another spectacular story, “Dream Girls”is part science fiction and part fantasy with a morbid twist. In this world, there is a technology on the market called Dream Girls, which is a robot alien hybrid that can take the form of any woman the owner thinks of. Think morphing sex doll. Due to the invention of these, marriage rates have declined, Marilyn Monroe was murdered and Kennedy assassinated. As expected, Dream Boys didn’t work out as well because women want companionship versus random sexual encounters, but at least Catholic Priests are better off.
In “Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel” (this one’s amazing too!!!) a writer is suffering from a case of writer’s block when he meets a drug dealer who traffics words. Empty looking Ziploc bags full of words. They come in adjectives, cliches, you name it, and each set of words has its own unique smell. After inhaling the bag it temporarily cures writer’s block, but that doesn’t mean what you write is going to be any good. Fun, witty, AND implausible. All my favorite things in one neat little bundle.
“Captivity” is the shortest story of the short stories and is from the point of view of a shampoo bottle. It’s also very dark, graphic, and sad. Very very sad. So sad it will make you hope your shampoo isn’t sentient. PLEASE DON’T HAVE FEELINGS SHAMPOO!
This offshoot of his second published novel Fated, “The Sodom and Gomorrah Shore” is centered around the characters of Sloth and Gluttony and written in script format. Basically, it revolves around the personification of the seven deadly sins if they had their own reality show at the biblical destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah. Lots of fantasy and imagination stretching in this one. Browne even brings in Lot and his wife if you’re into biblical things and don’t think everything is blasphemous.
“Homer’s Reprise” is the only story not written in the third person and follows Odysseus. It’s also set in the future when Cerberus, Big Foot and the Loch Ness Monster are stuffed and on display in museums. Also Odysseus is immortal and in charge of protecting the beasts of the world. I’m not completely as good as I once was with my Greek mythology, so not 100% sure where it came from, but I like the concept. It also gives us insight into Browne’s writing process, and he tells us, “I’m a pantser. I write the same way Indiana Jones deal with Nazis and stolen artifacts: I’m making it up as I go.”
In another story bound for bookdom, AKA “Dr. Lullaby” a group of men who test prescription medicine before it goes public get super powers. These super powers, are side-effect related, i.e. may cause weight gain, drowsiness, and vomiting and the men who get them use their new found prowess for good. The main character also makes extra cash by allowing people to yell their frustrations at him. If I had a tougher skin it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world.
Finally, there is “Zombie Gigolo” which was written for a gross out contest. It’s incredibly gross, almost too gross, probably due to the plot which centers around a zombie gigolo. He is himself a zombie and there’s lots of descriptive… Juiciness. Getting nauseous just thinking about it.
August 10, 2012
Is it any wonder that SG Browne has become one of my new favorite authors? I read his book "Fated" last year, followed it with "Breathers" this year, and now this short story collection "Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel".
Let me start by saying that I rarely read short story collections. I find some short stories are brilliant, but that the majority of them leave much to be desired. This probably comes from my desire to delve into characters and understand them. Short stories, by nature of the "short" part, are precluded from any deep analysis of characterization and are typically situation and plot driven. While these stories are no different in that respect, the writing is remarkably clever carrying the reader on a fun romp. To add to the fun, at the end of each story is a blurb by the author explaining a bit about how he came to write that particular story.
The first story, "A Zombie's Lament" ultimately became the novel "Breathers". After reading the short story, I must say I am glad Mr. Browne decided to expand upon this idea. The short story was dark and a bit depressing. The novel adds so much more humor... although I still felt the poor zombies were getting a raw deal!
The title entry into this collection was my favorite. It follows a writer who is suffering from writers block only to find a dealer with bags of words. The story becomes a remarkably witty word salad. Part of me hopes that the author leaves this perfect little gem just as it; but then part of me would like to see if he could carry the magic through an entire novel.
Another favorite is "The Sodom and Gomorrah Shore". It is a spin-off from his novel "Fated" and stars the characters of Sloth and Gluttony in a reality show set in the Biblical towns of Sodom and Gomorrah. Another laugh out loud story with great social and religious commentary subtext.
Along with the aforementioned stories we also have "Dream Girls" about a future where technology has allowed for human-alien-clone girls that can morph into anything the owner desires. There is "My Ego Is Bigger Than Yours" about a future where people can take a drug that will allow them to temporarily assume the personality of a dead celebrity. "Captivity", possibly the darkest of the stories, and one that will make you look at your shampoo bottle differently for the rest of your life. "Homer's Reprise" is a mash up of Greek mythology with American and Scottish mythos and some other strange stuff thrown in. An offbeat super hero story is the best way to describe "Dr Lullaby". "Zombie Gigolo" was written for a gross-out contest and I am not sure how he didn't win first prize with it! It is disgusting, and yet hilarious. I read it to my husband; he laughed non-stop but may never get an erection again. (Thank you very much, Mr. Browne!)
And then there is "Softland" about a family of luck-poachers. I was left wanting more, so I am on my way out now to pick up a copy of "Lucky Bastard", which is the novel developed from it.
Let me start by saying that I rarely read short story collections. I find some short stories are brilliant, but that the majority of them leave much to be desired. This probably comes from my desire to delve into characters and understand them. Short stories, by nature of the "short" part, are precluded from any deep analysis of characterization and are typically situation and plot driven. While these stories are no different in that respect, the writing is remarkably clever carrying the reader on a fun romp. To add to the fun, at the end of each story is a blurb by the author explaining a bit about how he came to write that particular story.
The first story, "A Zombie's Lament" ultimately became the novel "Breathers". After reading the short story, I must say I am glad Mr. Browne decided to expand upon this idea. The short story was dark and a bit depressing. The novel adds so much more humor... although I still felt the poor zombies were getting a raw deal!
The title entry into this collection was my favorite. It follows a writer who is suffering from writers block only to find a dealer with bags of words. The story becomes a remarkably witty word salad. Part of me hopes that the author leaves this perfect little gem just as it; but then part of me would like to see if he could carry the magic through an entire novel.
Another favorite is "The Sodom and Gomorrah Shore". It is a spin-off from his novel "Fated" and stars the characters of Sloth and Gluttony in a reality show set in the Biblical towns of Sodom and Gomorrah. Another laugh out loud story with great social and religious commentary subtext.
Along with the aforementioned stories we also have "Dream Girls" about a future where technology has allowed for human-alien-clone girls that can morph into anything the owner desires. There is "My Ego Is Bigger Than Yours" about a future where people can take a drug that will allow them to temporarily assume the personality of a dead celebrity. "Captivity", possibly the darkest of the stories, and one that will make you look at your shampoo bottle differently for the rest of your life. "Homer's Reprise" is a mash up of Greek mythology with American and Scottish mythos and some other strange stuff thrown in. An offbeat super hero story is the best way to describe "Dr Lullaby". "Zombie Gigolo" was written for a gross-out contest and I am not sure how he didn't win first prize with it! It is disgusting, and yet hilarious. I read it to my husband; he laughed non-stop but may never get an erection again. (Thank you very much, Mr. Browne!)
And then there is "Softland" about a family of luck-poachers. I was left wanting more, so I am on my way out now to pick up a copy of "Lucky Bastard", which is the novel developed from it.
October 17, 2012
Overall, I was disappointed in this collection. It gets a 5.5/10 rating. Here is a brief listing of the stories you will find within this book:
A ZOMBIE’S LAMENT I’m very familiar with the characters from BREATHERS. Love the voice of the zombie - slightly cynical with a dash of humor. 6
SOFTLAND This story has an interesting idea: people who poach luck from other people and then sell it on the black market. I thought this story had the best opening sentence I’d read in years until I read that Browne took most of it from a Beck album. I do like this sentence: “After all, you can’t take something from someone without eventually paying a price.” I call that karma. 6
MY EGO IS BIGGER THAN YOURS Wherein a man injects Egos on a regular basis and perhaps begins to suffer side effects. Or is he? Best story so far. The beginning drags with the naming of all the celebrities but picks up with the first poisoning. Then I started getting tired of the sexual references. 8
DREAM GIRLS A misogynist story. Don’t bother reading it. 0
SHOOTING MONKEYS IN A BARREL More sexual references. Why does seemingly everything have to be a sexual reference? Ugh! I’m no prude but jeez, can’t a story just be a story? More great sentences: “I feel buoyant and warm and fluffy. I don’t know how I can feel fluffy, but I do.” Good story, not great. 6
CAPTIVITY Boring. 5
THE SODOM AND GOMORRAH SHORE Pretty good. I’m also familiar with these characters from FATED. 6
HOMER’S REPRISE Huh? This is a lot of things thrown together in a very short story. 7
DR. LULLABY Very interesting. My favorite story of the bunch. Medical “guinea pigs” begin to have the power to make other people have those unfortunate side effects that they list at the end of pharmaceutical commercials and take up most of the commercial. I really enjoyed this and it could have been even longer. 9
ZOMBIE GIGOLO Although it has a good first line: “Is it necrophilia if you’re both dead?” and some really gross description, I stopped reading before the end of the first page. This was actually written for a Gross-Out Contest. I’m surprised it only got third place because it grossed me out enough to stop reading it. 2
A ZOMBIE’S LAMENT I’m very familiar with the characters from BREATHERS. Love the voice of the zombie - slightly cynical with a dash of humor. 6
SOFTLAND This story has an interesting idea: people who poach luck from other people and then sell it on the black market. I thought this story had the best opening sentence I’d read in years until I read that Browne took most of it from a Beck album. I do like this sentence: “After all, you can’t take something from someone without eventually paying a price.” I call that karma. 6
MY EGO IS BIGGER THAN YOURS Wherein a man injects Egos on a regular basis and perhaps begins to suffer side effects. Or is he? Best story so far. The beginning drags with the naming of all the celebrities but picks up with the first poisoning. Then I started getting tired of the sexual references. 8
DREAM GIRLS A misogynist story. Don’t bother reading it. 0
SHOOTING MONKEYS IN A BARREL More sexual references. Why does seemingly everything have to be a sexual reference? Ugh! I’m no prude but jeez, can’t a story just be a story? More great sentences: “I feel buoyant and warm and fluffy. I don’t know how I can feel fluffy, but I do.” Good story, not great. 6
CAPTIVITY Boring. 5
THE SODOM AND GOMORRAH SHORE Pretty good. I’m also familiar with these characters from FATED. 6
HOMER’S REPRISE Huh? This is a lot of things thrown together in a very short story. 7
DR. LULLABY Very interesting. My favorite story of the bunch. Medical “guinea pigs” begin to have the power to make other people have those unfortunate side effects that they list at the end of pharmaceutical commercials and take up most of the commercial. I really enjoyed this and it could have been even longer. 9
ZOMBIE GIGOLO Although it has a good first line: “Is it necrophilia if you’re both dead?” and some really gross description, I stopped reading before the end of the first page. This was actually written for a Gross-Out Contest. I’m surprised it only got third place because it grossed me out enough to stop reading it. 2
July 2, 2013
$3.99 hasn't bought me this much joy since happy meals in the 90's. If you like reading about the things we take for granted, new ways of looking at everything from luck to zombies, or wondering what it would feel like to be a shampoo bottle, this book is for you. Let's be honest, I love Scott's work. I think the guy is brilliant. I haven't had my fix in a few months, because he's between novels, so this book cured me of everything that ailed me.
It's only available through Amazon, right now, but you can purchase it for the e-readers, on most of your phones, and/or the computer program. Make it happen.
It's about 136 pages, so it will most likely be a one-sitting book, unless you want to take your time and really savour each story (I wish I did). Other than the stories themselves, my favorite part of the book is that Scott gives you a personal glimpse of where each story came from or how it came to be, after each piece.
It's only available through Amazon, right now, but you can purchase it for the e-readers, on most of your phones, and/or the computer program. Make it happen.
It's about 136 pages, so it will most likely be a one-sitting book, unless you want to take your time and really savour each story (I wish I did). Other than the stories themselves, my favorite part of the book is that Scott gives you a personal glimpse of where each story came from or how it came to be, after each piece.
January 7, 2014
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A collection of 10 short stories. A decent collection up until the last story, Zombie Gigolo, which I found out after reading was written as an entry in a GrossOut contest (it took third and I don't even want to go near what beat it out...*retch*). The other stories were fun with the short stories that eventually bloomed into three of his current novels and some others were he was playing around with concepts that may eventually turn into full length novels or were simply exercises in "Hey, this seems like a neat idea, let's explore that". His writing style is rampant throughout so if you like it, it's a fun collection. Even more fun are his thoughts about where the ideas for each story came from and how it developed as he was writing it.
A collection of 10 short stories. A decent collection up until the last story, Zombie Gigolo, which I found out after reading was written as an entry in a GrossOut contest (it took third and I don't even want to go near what beat it out...*retch*). The other stories were fun with the short stories that eventually bloomed into three of his current novels and some others were he was playing around with concepts that may eventually turn into full length novels or were simply exercises in "Hey, this seems like a neat idea, let's explore that". His writing style is rampant throughout so if you like it, it's a fun collection. Even more fun are his thoughts about where the ideas for each story came from and how it developed as he was writing it.
May 8, 2012
The eBook exclusive short story collection Shooting Monkeys in a Barrel (yes monkeys, not fish) serves as one heck of a great love letter directly from author S.G. Browne to loyal fans of his work.
Want to read the original short stories that served as the basis for his debut novel Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament and his latest creation Lucky Bastard? Jonesing for more from the glorious cast of deadly sins that populate his second novel Fated? Looking for a sneak peak at what deliciously deviant ideas he’s currently cooking up for future books? Want to know where the inspiration for his tales comes from? It’s all here, and much, much more. Oh, and the incredibly low price tag doesn’t hurt either.
READ MORE:
http://www.opinionless.com/book-revie...
Want to read the original short stories that served as the basis for his debut novel Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament and his latest creation Lucky Bastard? Jonesing for more from the glorious cast of deadly sins that populate his second novel Fated? Looking for a sneak peak at what deliciously deviant ideas he’s currently cooking up for future books? Want to know where the inspiration for his tales comes from? It’s all here, and much, much more. Oh, and the incredibly low price tag doesn’t hurt either.
READ MORE:
http://www.opinionless.com/book-revie...
February 13, 2017
This was a tricky collection. I've read a few of his books that were expansions of four of these short stories, so it seemed a little redundant. At least two stories have been expanded into books I haven't read, and reading the short version make me think I could actually skip them. I don't know if that's good or not. Still a decent quick read and a good introduction to his work.
April 26, 2013
The comparison to Christopher Moore has to be made first. After that, we'll I think it might be more of a three star read, in terms of the language, but I loved the ideas behind all of the stories. Particularly the last one, Zombie Giggalo, because I've never been so grossed out while reading!
September 20, 2015
It's fun to see where two of my favorite novels came from. The idea process behind them. These are a great collection of tales, and they're not for everyone. If you are very conservative when it comes to certain topics than please keep away.
July 14, 2012
Loved Ego and Dream Girls. It was great to see the kernels that beget Breathers and Lucky Bastard. I can't wait to see what you do with Lullaby, S.G.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews