The Bitchographies: Random Commentaries About Life, Love and Knock-off Christian Louboutins

by Vivienne Vuitton

This book isn’t intended to change the world, spread niceties, be politically correct or win a Pulitzer Prize. Instead, it’s an opportunity to make a bold statement—to embrace one’s inner bitch side, which, contrary to popular belief, resides within all of us. This book enables us all to be authentic, real and raw.

Join Vivienne Vuitton as she documents her hilarious, unfiltered life experiences in random vignettes. You will note that she has no issues exposing the shortcomings of boyfriends from the past, fake friends, Facebook, melted Barbie and other such annoyances.

This book is dedicated to all of us who struggle with tolerating and biting our tongues on a daily basis when it comes to dealing with stupid people, ridiculous situations and the various annoyances that monopolize our time! More often than not, we are simply too nice to say anything. So, in want of that sentiment, Vuitton has devoted her spare time to stopping being nice, telling the truth and to stop living in a fantasy world. The book also presents an opportunity for readers to laugh off a certain part of their body.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor

180 pages, Paperback

First published February 1, 2012

Reviews

[Danyelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Bitchographies was an amusing and entertaining read where the characters are transferrable to everyday life situations. The author was creative to structure each chapter so that they are contained within a theme; hence, allowing the reader to associate each story with various aspects of everyday life. Cleverly done, the sections of the book addresses irritations many of us might experience in our life with work, people, relationships and random peeves.

Vivienne’s tauntingly contemptuous approach in dealing with each of her predicament causes me to wish that I could be so bold as to use my inner voice when meeting the likes of “The Psycho Crazy Boss, Senior Management, Exes, or The Narcissist.” The similarity of each incident coincides with encounters that an average individual might be exposed to in his/her life. In some occurrences, the reader might feel that they are walking in Vivienne’s shoes.

The satire in each chapter indulges the reader to continue on. The author’s loose writing style contributes to a quick and easy read making this book a must have for those who want to laugh. In the end, the book leaves us with the message that life is too short for us to let "random, annoying and potentially irrelevant situations" drag us down. As Vivienne points out, hey “Captain Obvious, why don’t you tell me something that I don’t already know?”

[Debra · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sarcastic, witty, and funny. A great escape from the stresses of everyday life! A must read!

[Haley Kilgour · Rating 3 out of 5]

Take it from Vivienne, people are not always the sharpest tool in the shed, but keeping your trap shut, is usually the best bet. But that doesn’t mean we all haven’t encountered these people. And she’s about to make you feel oh so much better about the crazies in your life.

Going into this, I expected comedic commentary. I did get commentary, I wouldn’t quite call it comedic. There were certain comedic elements at time (mostly found in the unlabeled section), but otherwise it was just no nonsense, here’s my thoughts on certain types of people—or situations.

The first segment, relating to dating, while I couldn’t relate to personally as I’m unmarried in in my mid 20s, I did find incredibly relatable. I’ve still had to deal with the douchebag date. And the “oof, I’ve let myself go moment”. I think middle aged women, whether divorced or not will enjoy this section.

The corporate section was well over my head. I make a point in my job to deal with as few people as possible and to reside in an office only as a dire necessity. I did find this section is where Vivienne jumped from experiences to describing people. Personally, it wasn’t my thing. But also, I don’t deal with these kinds of people, so I’m not able to commiserate. People who do work in corporate America will probably find this section enjoyable, however.

The People section was probably one of the wittier sections. Though it was mostly just complaining about people… we’ll they’re they type of people we all complain about. And usually rightfully so.

While this book isn’t bad, I did notice about halfway through that this book only really deals with negative people and experiences. And that made me a little sad for the author. But, the from the few glimpses of the good side, I know it’s just me reading into it.

I did also notice a bit of a quirk. Sometimes, British English is used, yet the publishing company is from Vermont. Nothing major and it certainly didn’t ruin the book, but just something I noticed. And it did make me wonder if Vivienne is from the UK. As did the whole story about Sunday afternoon tea.

[Stacy40pages · Rating 4 out of 5]

Bitchographies: Random Commentaries About Life, Love, and Knockoff Christian Louboutins. Thanks to @dartfrogbooks for the gifted copy ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Newly single Vivienne Vuitton vents on life, love, and everything in between. “The Bitchographies is a reminder that it’s alright to vent and even bitch on occasion, use your outside voice, be the most fabulous YOU that you can be, and unapologetically live your label.”

If you’re looking for a quick, fun, witty and sarcastic read.. here it is. I connected with the author and enjoyed her personality, which really comes out in the book. She is honest and tells you straight from the beginning what you are going to get. I recognized a lot of her experiences and the people she talks about (“The Crazy Bitch Boss”). It is a short and fast read, but you could also easily just read a chapter or two at a time, and still get a lot of enjoyment from it.

“In my world, life without the latest Vuitton is tantamount to a long and painful existence.”

[Karen (kmo.reads) · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Bitchographies: Random Commentaries About Life, Love and Knock-off Christian Louboutins by Vivienne Vuitton.

The title of this book - The Bitchographies had me intriguied from the beginning. I mean who doesn't like a good venting session?!
And that is just what this was - a book filled with random stories of the author’s life. I have to admit I found myself laughing and nodding my head many times throughout the book.

Vuitton says everything we have ever wanted to say outloud and I have no doubt that you can relate to something in here to bad bosses to crappy friends and bad marriages.

If you are looking for a light, quick and laughable read this one is for you!

Thank you to @dartfrogbooks for the gifted copy.

[Lisa Konet · Rating 2 out of 5]

I loved the sarcasm and bad attitude with these stories but the book seemed like one big complaint. Some parts were LOL hilarious and I could relate but there were also some cringe-worthy hateful moments where there should have been some sympathy, JMO.

Wish I would have liked this more but still a decent read of one woman's observations. Possible recommendation.

Thanks to Netgalley, Vivienne Vuitton and Dart Frog Books for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.

Available: 10/5/21

[Amanda · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you #Netgalley for the copy!

Vivienne Vuitton shares many short essays of people you may encounter during your life, work place drama, the progression of friendships and so much more. There will be at least one story that you will be able to relate to. Loved her sarcastic perspectives and how sometimes you just have to bite your tongue and move along.

[Wayne Webb · Rating 1 out of 5]

So it starts funny. And the writer has a good line in sarcasm and timing. But. Gets tired and mean fast.
Zero sense of irony for her displaying all the talking points she’s criticising.
If it’s supposed to be a meta criticism? Doesn’t work. It just feels bitter and blind.
Mercifully short.

[Linda · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love love this book!
A delicious read and short enough to read in one sitting

[Lise · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this uncomplicated book
It certainly is fun and I can relate to many chapters !
A definite read for those who like honest observation with some self deprecation along the way

[Mandy Hazen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a page turner from beginning to end. Raw real and hilarious. I felt like I had a front row seat to a real housewives and loved every second of it! I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.

[Trina · Rating 1 out of 5]

It was like having a long conversation with a serial complainer who really doesn't have any "real things" to complain about. Had I known some of the people/situations involved in what the author was bitching about it might have made it more interesting. Since I do not, she is just telling other peoples stories without the benefit of being clever or particularly descriptive. It ends up being a dull book with juvenile attempts to cover up the identities of those involved and herself. There are 16 pages devoted to explaining why she is hiding behind this Vivienne Vuitton character then she goes on to blast others for being fake. The phrasing throughout the book is awkward and the chapter transitions are horrendous. It seems as if the book was written out of order and no one bothered to go back and set it right.

[Clittlerogers.blackberry.net · Rating 5 out of 5]

Viv's establishes the intent of her book in the very beginning. She also accomplishes exactly this with her bold and witty humour. Evidently some of the commentaries come from readers who missed this objective or perhaps these are individuals who either recognize one or more of the characters Viv writes about. Worse yet, perhaps they are one of the individuals. Maybe they just simply receognize some of the characterstics Viv writes about as some of their own. Regardless of whether you know some of the characters in the book or not, everyone has crossed paths with one or more of these individuals in their lifetime and can surely relate!

The book is entertaining and anyone digging deeper than that may not be able to handle it - hence take note of the preface!

[Lesley · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this book!!! It was hilarious, witty, sarcastic and well written. I can promise that there was not one chapter that I didn't love.

My favourites included: the melted barbie, bridezilla, dating redefined and wtf facebook .Even though I didn't personally know these characters, I am sure that they could be almost anyone that I knew. I would recommend this book to anyone that wants a light read! Great book and I can't wait for a sequel.

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

I got this book as a giveaway on goodreads. Thanks.

This book was funny, exciting, and a great read. I would recommend this book to any woman. But this book is definetly a good read. i really enjoyed it.

[Jaime (Twisting the Lens) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious, sarcastic, and entertaining from beginning to end! For the fan of 'Sex and the City' who likes to kick ass and does not take any sh#%. I am going ot post a longer review later, but I wanted to get my two cents in.

I won this through GoodReads FirstReads.