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I Am Only a Foreigner Because You Do Not Understand
Some books take the whole of a lifetime to write. I Am Only a Foreigner Because You Do Not Understand continues Flocks , L. Nichols’s graphic memoir of growing up trans in the rural South. These comics document L.’s further transition, from living as a man to walking the middle path, facing depression, disease, divorce and death. Healing leaves scars, things fall apart, and pronouns change until there is no I, there is only us.
144 pages, Paperback
Published November 14, 2023
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
June 21, 2024
A lovely collection of vignettes and emotional nuggets that are more poetic than I usually care for but are loaded with truth, honesty and vulnerability.
An interesting follow-up to Nichols' more straightforward Flocks.
An interesting follow-up to Nichols' more straightforward Flocks.
May 4, 2024
And today's pick is I am Only A Foreigner Because You Do Not Understand by L. Nichols. Published by Secret Acres in 2023.
As it will quickly become clear, I picked up this title specifically for my queer TBR. I believe I found it through my library's new acquisitions page.
Content notes for body horror, covid, nudity, mental health struggle, parental abuse, unsupportive family, surgery, childhood sexual assault, and fat phobia.
Keywords that came to mind reading this volume: poetic, growing up, grief, finding joy, and change.
While I had seen Nichols' previous work Flocks around, I had yet to read it. So it is not necessary to read one before the other. Although the added context would probably have been a plus.
Otherwise, scrolling through his portfolio website, L Nichols is a "multi-disciplinary artist with a distinct voice that utilizes the language of science and engineering to add an additional layer of meaning and complexity to his art".
Art wise I felt like I am Only A foreigner was an extremely visually poetic work. Not psychedelic, it just felt very layered, it used visuals to express emotions, and the heavy dose of body horror also felt like a beautiful blend of nonfiction and genre.
The writing was an equally engrossing and layered exploration of the deeply personal. Thinking about moving beyond the binary and expanding gender queer spaces; seeing people who have hurt you whenever you look in the mirror; the negatives of making yourself smaller (physically and otherwise); the impact of all kinds of abuse. There was a lot of pain, but there were also points of purposefully cultivated joy both joys from becoming a parent, but also the joys that come from living into the truth of one's trans experience.
As a trans gender queer person, I always appreciate windows into the lives of people like me. In a world that is still filled with so much policed gender binary absolutes, I Am Only a Foreigner Because You Do Not Understand was a glass of cool fresh water.
Deep diving into a certain kind of "failed" physicality, it wasn't disability discourse per say but got much closer then most. I also appreciated the way Nichols touched on the price tag of having one's trans ness surgically affirmed. Obviously not something everyone wants or needs, but still an important gate that many can't unlock no matter how much they want to.
There was some exploration of sexual relationships, particularly in how they relate to Nichols' body and gender, but it wasn't a focus in and of itself per say.
Race was similarly not a focus, although there is some visual diversity in racial representation in the background.
Place was not a factor at all.
Wrapping things up, not a must read but very very very good in my opinion. Both for its subject but also the way in which it is put together. Five stars.
As it will quickly become clear, I picked up this title specifically for my queer TBR. I believe I found it through my library's new acquisitions page.
Content notes for body horror, covid, nudity, mental health struggle, parental abuse, unsupportive family, surgery, childhood sexual assault, and fat phobia.
Keywords that came to mind reading this volume: poetic, growing up, grief, finding joy, and change.
While I had seen Nichols' previous work Flocks around, I had yet to read it. So it is not necessary to read one before the other. Although the added context would probably have been a plus.
Otherwise, scrolling through his portfolio website, L Nichols is a "multi-disciplinary artist with a distinct voice that utilizes the language of science and engineering to add an additional layer of meaning and complexity to his art".
Art wise I felt like I am Only A foreigner was an extremely visually poetic work. Not psychedelic, it just felt very layered, it used visuals to express emotions, and the heavy dose of body horror also felt like a beautiful blend of nonfiction and genre.
The writing was an equally engrossing and layered exploration of the deeply personal. Thinking about moving beyond the binary and expanding gender queer spaces; seeing people who have hurt you whenever you look in the mirror; the negatives of making yourself smaller (physically and otherwise); the impact of all kinds of abuse. There was a lot of pain, but there were also points of purposefully cultivated joy both joys from becoming a parent, but also the joys that come from living into the truth of one's trans experience.
As a trans gender queer person, I always appreciate windows into the lives of people like me. In a world that is still filled with so much policed gender binary absolutes, I Am Only a Foreigner Because You Do Not Understand was a glass of cool fresh water.
Deep diving into a certain kind of "failed" physicality, it wasn't disability discourse per say but got much closer then most. I also appreciated the way Nichols touched on the price tag of having one's trans ness surgically affirmed. Obviously not something everyone wants or needs, but still an important gate that many can't unlock no matter how much they want to.
There was some exploration of sexual relationships, particularly in how they relate to Nichols' body and gender, but it wasn't a focus in and of itself per say.
Race was similarly not a focus, although there is some visual diversity in racial representation in the background.
Place was not a factor at all.
Wrapping things up, not a must read but very very very good in my opinion. Both for its subject but also the way in which it is put together. Five stars.
April 18, 2024
“i believe that love is an action, and i choose to love.. even when it’s hard. my actions are my only true belongings”
May 30, 2024
Oh man♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️
read-comix
December 17, 2023“But maybe my strength isn’t this… it’s in being hurt… and still choosing to love.”
I do own FLOCKS, but have yet to read it so I don’t think you have to read it first to enjoy this one. IAOAFBYDNU is vignettes about the author’s experience with fatphobia and mental abuse, and there are graphic depictions of this. Other themes discussed: strained familial relationships, childhood sexual abuse, body dysmorphia, gender identity and an ex-partner’s lack of support of said identity. Overall this is a short and quick read, but it packs a heavy punch. I’m thankful Nichols was willing to share their journey to self acceptance with the world, because we all could be more accepting of experiences that differ from our own.
I do own FLOCKS, but have yet to read it so I don’t think you have to read it first to enjoy this one. IAOAFBYDNU is vignettes about the author’s experience with fatphobia and mental abuse, and there are graphic depictions of this. Other themes discussed: strained familial relationships, childhood sexual abuse, body dysmorphia, gender identity and an ex-partner’s lack of support of said identity. Overall this is a short and quick read, but it packs a heavy punch. I’m thankful Nichols was willing to share their journey to self acceptance with the world, because we all could be more accepting of experiences that differ from our own.
February 14, 2024
I think some of the best writing comes from a vulnerable place of humanity that many people can relate to, even though our situations may be different. And that's how I felt when reading the first few pages of this book.
I picked up this book because of its vibrant cover, but the early sentences grabbed me: "I have never felt at home here [in my body]... I keep hoping you'll discover the secret language of myself and teach it to me, like a child learning the words for the world around them..." YES.
I brought this book home and read it cover to cover. It was wonderful to read this non-fiction story, written so beautifully and with such expressive drawings. There are certain phrases I know I will come back to again and again, because they resonated with something inside of me, which is an incredible feeling. <3
I picked up this book because of its vibrant cover, but the early sentences grabbed me: "I have never felt at home here [in my body]... I keep hoping you'll discover the secret language of myself and teach it to me, like a child learning the words for the world around them..." YES.
I brought this book home and read it cover to cover. It was wonderful to read this non-fiction story, written so beautifully and with such expressive drawings. There are certain phrases I know I will come back to again and again, because they resonated with something inside of me, which is an incredible feeling. <3
July 31, 2023
Triggers: the illustrations can be tough for sensitive readers Fat shaming Mental abuse
The next chapter from Nichols in their lives. In many ways the flow of the story is abstract and a bit splintered, but is also logical. Perhaps more artistically created than Flocks, but still strong and powerful. I read via an online reader, therefore looking forward to finding a final copy. Not something to read just once, or if not "in the mood" or "uncomfortable" or unable to be relaxed while reading.
The next chapter from Nichols in their lives. In many ways the flow of the story is abstract and a bit splintered, but is also logical. Perhaps more artistically created than Flocks, but still strong and powerful. I read via an online reader, therefore looking forward to finding a final copy. Not something to read just once, or if not "in the mood" or "uncomfortable" or unable to be relaxed while reading.
May 15, 2024
Very good, the art is very beautiful, a fantastic viewpoint into gender identity. The vulnerability the author showcases here is incredible and a honor to have read.
Some tw's going into this book include
-suicidal thoughts
- sexual assault
- abusive/toxic relationship (romantic and familial)
- body dysmorphia
- mental illness
Some tw's going into this book include
-suicidal thoughts
- sexual assault
- abusive/toxic relationship (romantic and familial)
- body dysmorphia
- mental illness
May 12, 2025
Wow! This exceeded all my expectations. I somehow didn’t realize it was a graphic memoir going into it (just bought it because I loved the cover), but damn, it was so good. I loved the art and the vignettes they told their story in. It made it digestible and powerful all at the same time. Would highly recommend this one!
November 11, 2023
I am not trans, but Nichols presents their stories in such an easily accessible way, you would be hard pressed to find anyone who could not find something to relate to in here. And I just love the textured art. It's got substance. I'm gonna have to track down Flocks now.
January 25, 2024
A gut-wrenching, poetic memoir about being a stranger in your own body and feeling so worthless from growing up with an abusive mother and having a similarly inconsiderate partner that the author feels like a voodoo doll. Interesting, beautiful, and a touch hopeful.
January 29, 2024
This was a very short graphic novel about a trans man's experience with their body dysmorphia, as well as their inner thoughts about their overall insecurities. The book is very very short and also very raw. It was a quick read, but one that was pretty sad and a thought provoking one as well.
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September 6, 2025I enjoyed most of this and related to a lot. The biggest downside here was that there were several graphic SA tidbits without trigger warnings or any indication in the synopsis that it would be prevalent in these vignettes, which is something that I really don’t like.
May 27, 2023
really lovely and poignant. very relatable.
November 11, 2023
Moving renderings of difficult subjects (abuse, fat phobia, etc.). I appreciated Nichols' nuanced treatment of body image and addressing the assumptions sometimes imposed on trans people.
February 27, 2024
Lovely QT visual poems about the body and masculinity and the question for loving one self
June 8, 2024
Raw, beautiful piece.
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May 11, 2025There is a lot to take in from this book
July 11, 2025
art is cool but that makes me wish it was just art and no words tbh… kinda cliche
October 8, 2025
raw and uncomfortable and comforting and glorious
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews