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Blind Devotion: Survival on the Front Lines of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder and Addiction
One woman's startling firsthand account of her struggle to protect her children while facing the man she married, a combat veteran plagued by addiction, rage, and depression born from PTSD.
Sharlene peered out the window into the blackness that enveloped her yard. She couldn’t see them, but she knew they were out there--police officers and a SWAT team holding their positions in the wood line out her front door, their weapons trained with deadly precision pointing at her home.“Don’t let them shoot at my kids!” she shouted into the phone to the dispatcher as her drunk, enraged, and armed husband picked up the other line, “Go on, get the hell out of here then!”When she first met Sean seven years earlier, Sharlene never imagined that he’d someday be the catalyst to this terrifying scene. Sean was handsome in his camouflage fatigues, looking proud and just a little cocky. Unlike any other man she had ever met, he was an easy, charming conversationalist and his sincerity was unmistakable. The two married and started a family.But Sean’s drinking soon took over, and signs of depression and his raging outbursts amplified. Something was seriously wrong. He never talked about his tours overseas, including his seven-month peacekeeping mission in the aftermath of Slobodan Milosevic’s ethnic cleansing campaign, but there were signs that what he experienced in Bosnia left him reeling at his core. As Sean’s behavior grew increasingly worse, Sharlene’s obsessive worry for his well–being trumped her basic needs. She knew that her husband was suffering from tremendous inner turmoil--which she later learned was PTSD--and she hoped, more than anything, to nurse him back to the loving partner and father she knew he could be.A powerful story of pain and forgiveness, horror and hope, Blind Devotion gives voice to the thousands of families who are struggling to heal and to achieve a sense of normalcy stolen by the trauma in their lives.
Sharlene peered out the window into the blackness that enveloped her yard. She couldn’t see them, but she knew they were out there--police officers and a SWAT team holding their positions in the wood line out her front door, their weapons trained with deadly precision pointing at her home.“Don’t let them shoot at my kids!” she shouted into the phone to the dispatcher as her drunk, enraged, and armed husband picked up the other line, “Go on, get the hell out of here then!”When she first met Sean seven years earlier, Sharlene never imagined that he’d someday be the catalyst to this terrifying scene. Sean was handsome in his camouflage fatigues, looking proud and just a little cocky. Unlike any other man she had ever met, he was an easy, charming conversationalist and his sincerity was unmistakable. The two married and started a family.But Sean’s drinking soon took over, and signs of depression and his raging outbursts amplified. Something was seriously wrong. He never talked about his tours overseas, including his seven-month peacekeeping mission in the aftermath of Slobodan Milosevic’s ethnic cleansing campaign, but there were signs that what he experienced in Bosnia left him reeling at his core. As Sean’s behavior grew increasingly worse, Sharlene’s obsessive worry for his well–being trumped her basic needs. She knew that her husband was suffering from tremendous inner turmoil--which she later learned was PTSD--and she hoped, more than anything, to nurse him back to the loving partner and father she knew he could be.A powerful story of pain and forgiveness, horror and hope, Blind Devotion gives voice to the thousands of families who are struggling to heal and to achieve a sense of normalcy stolen by the trauma in their lives.
348 pages, Paperback
First published September 13, 2012
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Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews
September 15, 2012
A memior depicting the aftermath of PTSD on a military veteran and his family. An eye opener for people not familiar with the condition and I am sure this book will be a source of strength for individuals and families whom are faced with this condition. This book certainly shows us that if you never lose hope and faith in any adverse situation the darkness of night always finishes with light of day.
December 19, 2018
This book reveals the author's struggle with her husband's addiction and PTSD, and her emotional enabling (to a point). It's not going to be everyone's experience, but it is hers and I applaud her ability to share her experience with everyone. The author writes very well.
June 7, 2014
3 stars mostly for the pages upon pages of resources spread throughout. The writing is engaging and the story has that "train wreck" quality- you know it's bad and you don't want to know the details, but you can't help yourself. Despite the epilogue, she still writes the book as a victim, constantly blaming ignorance and others which is a bit annoying. It may be that while I am experiencing the same nightmares she is with regards to PTSD, I have always been aware of the situation.
April 3, 2013
Interesting memoir about a woman and her family dealing with PTSD and codependency issues. Sad and shocking at times but still hopeful in the end. The author is a talented writer and made the story relatable and interesting.
November 12, 2013
I made the mistake of starting this book when I went to bed. Next thing I knew it was 2 AM & I still considered reading one more chapter. Excellent true story on PTSD, co-dependecy & addictions by a local author.
May 27, 2016
Could almost be my life story.
April 9, 2017
Well written - insightful about what it is like to live with a family member suffering from PTSD before it was even a "thing" and also an awareness of what codependency can do to a family
Displaying 1 - 7 of 7 reviews