It's Complicated (But It Doesn't Have to Be): A Modern Guide to Finding and Keeping Love

by Paul Carrick Brunson

The “Modern Day Matchmaker” presents a refreshingly optimistic and plainspoken dating guide to finding romance—both on- and off-line.

Finding and keeping a mate has never been harder. New rules are needed to navigate the complicated and changing modern-love landscape. If someone wants to find “the one,” what are the guidelines he or she needs to know, now that online dating and Google-searching a prospective love interest are the norm?

Happily married for ten years, Paul Carrick Brunson is a husband, a father, and a rising star in the matchmaking world. In It’s Complicated (But It Doesn’t Have to Be) , Brunson tackles relevant questions such
With an appealing mix of humor, candor, and real-world examples, It’s Complicated (But It Doesn’t Have to Be)   is a breath of fresh air in the dating guide category, offering a message of eternal optimism from a man who believes in true love—and practices what he preaches.

Genres: Relationships, Self Help, Personal Development, Nonfiction, Psychology

304 pages, Hardcover

First published September 13, 2012

Reviews

[Marsha · Rating 3 out of 5]

I picked this up on a whim at the library, expecting to read it and give it a good mocking. I have no love for most of this genre of self help books. I was pleasantly surprised to find that it was actually not bad reading; I liked his written "voice." He did make a lot of sense, often common sense (which occasionally is not so common these days, it seems). He was quite frank, and his chapter entitled "Sex is not super glue" talked about the neuro-chemical difference in men and women, which I found very helpful understanding the state of my own relationship at the time. All in all, this is not too bad. That saying, I just never got around to finishing it...I came about 30 or 40 pages from the end.

[Julia · Rating 3 out of 5]

I don't normally write reviews but enjoyed this book. I picked it up on a whim and wasn't disappointed. Though the information is common sense, it was refreshing to have a young, honest and blunt voice delivering the news.

[Kaci · Rating 3 out of 5]

Common-sense dating advice but delivered in a refreshingly blunt and honest matter.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is very reader friendly with practical advice. The author uses real life examples and current situations (use of social media profiles, online information, etc.) to convey his points. The chapters are not very long and there is a wrap up question and answer section at the end of each chapter to summarize what was discussed. I like the writing style and how he approaches each issue. This is a good, helpful book and I would recommend it for anyone trying to make changes to their approach to dating to get different results. Remember you cannot do the same thing and expect different results and Paul's suggestions are helpful to adjusting how you manage very important interactions in your life.

[Crystal Lander · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nice book but nothing new

[Angela · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed it and it got me thinking about dating differently.

[Elaine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Practical, no BS advice on dating in the modern day. The fact that the book was written in 2012 doesn't make it dated at all, as the advent of relationship apps already existed. I'm of the opinion that the obvious must be clearly stated, and this book is a tremendous help in doing that. Needless to say, I wasn't doing the obvious.

[Tolelia McClellan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome book!!

My life coach Chris recommended book because I want love again . I enjoyed all the homework after each chapter. This book gave be LIFE and I will be passing it along to friends and family.

[Josie Owens · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great I have learn so much from this book. It have given me so much insight. It all begins with YOU.

[Jenilee Blonigen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just what I needed to read concerning a relationship I recently decided isn't right for me. Paul gives lots of insight and inspiration! Love this book!

[Naomi Thompson · Rating 2 out of 5]

A friend lent me this book and I read it rather quickly. Brunson writes in a very straightforward, easy-to-read manner. The book itself is small and the font is medium sized, so it's really easy to breeze through the book.

I felt like Brunson was writing the book to people who are both clueless and socially retarded. There was obvious advice along the lines of - dress nicely, shave/shower regularly, care about your physical appearance, if you are overly damaged from your childhood GET THERAPY FIRST [before dating], etc. I found it pedistrian and pedantic, to be frank.

The only thing that I really appreciated was the fact that he pointed out that you should have common values with someone you want to get serious with (another big duh, but maybe not as obvious as 'shower regularly') and another thing was the point he made about putting effort into dating the way you would put effort into finding a job or going to school.

I also read Brunson's Facebook fan page, which was filled with more of his pedistrian dating advice.

[TL · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was very practical which I like self help books to be. I also enjoyed the examples he provided. However, I didn't care for the ending as it seemed a bit rushed and ended abruptly. It borders good advice and trendy pop culture fluff as some chapters are rich and thorough than others. I would recommend this book to a novice in the dating scene. I got a free copy of this book last year during his PR tour.

[Titilayo Kuti · Rating 4 out of 5]

Better than a blog

After reading so many of Paul's blogs on Essence I must say this read like a well thought out blog. The additional space was used efficiently. The core message to live and love your life where you're at is employee empowering. I will likely referebce this book again when I'm in another stage in my life.

[V · Rating 3 out of 5]

Chapter 11 Michael's story makes believe what happens happens with a reason

[Angela Williams · Rating 5 out of 5]

Definitely well worth reading.

[Dr. Rowland · Rating 5 out of 5]

Awesome read. It makes you think and teaches you how to change the dating game.

[Fran · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not for me.

[Mbma Group · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great Book.

[Sharice · Rating 4 out of 5]

great read! easy read also so i would suggest for young people. great advice & well written however a little repetitive at times.

[Marlena · Rating 3 out of 5]

A quick good read.