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How to Live With Another Person
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First published September 3, 1974
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
July 11, 2024
Considering I randomly picked this up for free outside some thrift store, I was surprised by the depth of the text. Despite being written over 40 years ago, the outlines of a relationship then were exactly the same as now. A very clear and concise narrative, I’d recommend it to anyone interested in relationship psychology.
March 19, 2024
Misleadingly titled. This book is not about how to cohabitate with another person. It is about how to exist within the world together. There are some good tidbits, but it overall seems very generic. I think it provides good reminders, such as "don't lose yourself." I found it is more of a conversation starter and thought provoker than a true self-help book.
October 1, 2023
How To Live with Another Person 192 pages paperback -
Apparently 1974 this was a well received book. I'm not sure when I bought it, sometime in the 90's and then never read it until now in 2023 and not only is it Outdated, it screams of Psychobabble. Ugh! You can always tell a psychiatrist has written something because it goes around and around saying a LOT of NOTHING! By two chapters in I had learned nothing because nothing was said. It was an endless loop of the same thing said in different ways without really saying anything.
The entire book is written like someone jotting thoughts down in a journal or on a daily calendar to remember what "cool thought" popped into his head that day. It's semi-disjointed, though it does appear to have been organized by similar ideas, it's very sporadic and not as flowing as a book but as a series of 'impressions'. He talks about children giving parents rights as parents should also give children -- this is a terrible section. One minute he's talking about the children as though they are very young and the parents should understand and accept the pressures and responsibilities of taking care of them but in the next sentence that the children should understand the parents have rights too...then back to young children, back up to maybe teens, then treating approaching adulthood but then back to babyhood. Basically, that chapter is all over the place and makes sense on one level and very little sense on another. NO child ever can be expected to understand what this guy is saying let alone actually doing it. Either he never had children at the point he wrote the book, or he truly should have been more organized and had a progression... but then that goes back to the disjointed way the whole book was put together. I cannot believe this book leads with "bestselling author".
Was there a nugget of anything useful? Depends on how deprived one is of any access to something better or said a million times before. At one point it appears that he's encouraging extramarital affairs as something that should be accepted as a way to stay in a marriage and accept that no one can stay with one person for their entire life or something that tells that humans aren't wired that way. Oookaay then... He does say though one thing that actually is useful applied to all areas not just the bedroom... and that is just because you read it doesn't mean it's true. Ha! I'll leave with that can be said of his book too!
Apparently 1974 this was a well received book. I'm not sure when I bought it, sometime in the 90's and then never read it until now in 2023 and not only is it Outdated, it screams of Psychobabble. Ugh! You can always tell a psychiatrist has written something because it goes around and around saying a LOT of NOTHING! By two chapters in I had learned nothing because nothing was said. It was an endless loop of the same thing said in different ways without really saying anything.
The entire book is written like someone jotting thoughts down in a journal or on a daily calendar to remember what "cool thought" popped into his head that day. It's semi-disjointed, though it does appear to have been organized by similar ideas, it's very sporadic and not as flowing as a book but as a series of 'impressions'. He talks about children giving parents rights as parents should also give children -- this is a terrible section. One minute he's talking about the children as though they are very young and the parents should understand and accept the pressures and responsibilities of taking care of them but in the next sentence that the children should understand the parents have rights too...then back to young children, back up to maybe teens, then treating approaching adulthood but then back to babyhood. Basically, that chapter is all over the place and makes sense on one level and very little sense on another. NO child ever can be expected to understand what this guy is saying let alone actually doing it. Either he never had children at the point he wrote the book, or he truly should have been more organized and had a progression... but then that goes back to the disjointed way the whole book was put together. I cannot believe this book leads with "bestselling author".
Was there a nugget of anything useful? Depends on how deprived one is of any access to something better or said a million times before. At one point it appears that he's encouraging extramarital affairs as something that should be accepted as a way to stay in a marriage and accept that no one can stay with one person for their entire life or something that tells that humans aren't wired that way. Oookaay then... He does say though one thing that actually is useful applied to all areas not just the bedroom... and that is just because you read it doesn't mean it's true. Ha! I'll leave with that can be said of his book too!
September 5, 2017
David Viscott, a psychiatrist, offers his insights re: how to effectively live with another person. It was first published in the 1970s. The author is now deceased.
There is a lot of thought provoking material in this book. I did not agree with 100% of what he said, but I did agree with most of it.
He believes that to be happy and fulfilled we have to find our own happiness within ourselves first. The other person, that we are in a relationship with, cannot do that for us. Part of the purpose of a healthy relationship is to support and encourage one another in helping each other reach our full potential. He encourages friends and other activities - i.e. NOT doing every single thing together as a couple. He also discussed the ups and downs of relationships, the fact that no one is perfect, etc. As a long married person, I do agree with this.
What I did not agree with were his very free attitudes toward moving in and out of relationships. He believes that you cannot trap someone in a relationship - that people should feel free to move in & out of relationships throughout their lives. While I thought this was good advice for dating - I didn't think it was excellent advice for staying married! Although it is true that you cannot force someone to stay in love and stay married, I thought he made it sound too easy to move out of a marriage - rather than trying to respect the commitment and working hard to preserve it.
It's a good read.
There is a lot of thought provoking material in this book. I did not agree with 100% of what he said, but I did agree with most of it.
He believes that to be happy and fulfilled we have to find our own happiness within ourselves first. The other person, that we are in a relationship with, cannot do that for us. Part of the purpose of a healthy relationship is to support and encourage one another in helping each other reach our full potential. He encourages friends and other activities - i.e. NOT doing every single thing together as a couple. He also discussed the ups and downs of relationships, the fact that no one is perfect, etc. As a long married person, I do agree with this.
What I did not agree with were his very free attitudes toward moving in and out of relationships. He believes that you cannot trap someone in a relationship - that people should feel free to move in & out of relationships throughout their lives. While I thought this was good advice for dating - I didn't think it was excellent advice for staying married! Although it is true that you cannot force someone to stay in love and stay married, I thought he made it sound too easy to move out of a marriage - rather than trying to respect the commitment and working hard to preserve it.
It's a good read.
December 19, 2017
Picked up this book as a recommendation from a Jim Rohn CD I listened to. It's ok. More of a series of blog entries from the author than a structured discussion. Lots of good thoughts in the book though.
September 25, 2016
Straightforward, no b.s. I think everyone should read it.
March 18, 2021
This book surprised me. I thought it would be talking about chores or details of maintaining the shared space. But this book is about being a good person that can provide for ourselves, and knows who we are and what we are looking for before getting into a committed relationship. The entire purpose of the relationship, based on the book, is to accompany each other as we grow. and Love is the light in life.
The last chapter is breaking up, FYI.
The last chapter is breaking up, FYI.
November 2, 2025
Free second hand book
An okay relationship book that has some common wisdom that's always nice to hear after a while. Some of the points in the book, for example harsh criticism toward monogamy, were a bit suprising and off-putting. Other than that it included some good reminders like the importance of alone time and accepting the other as they are.
An okay relationship book that has some common wisdom that's always nice to hear after a while. Some of the points in the book, for example harsh criticism toward monogamy, were a bit suprising and off-putting. Other than that it included some good reminders like the importance of alone time and accepting the other as they are.
February 27, 2021
I liked the aspect that the book justified:
1. Relationship isn't a goal to remove loneliness
2. It's about exploring the best version of the relationship's members, so they can be the most "myself"
1. Relationship isn't a goal to remove loneliness
2. It's about exploring the best version of the relationship's members, so they can be the most "myself"
July 19, 2016
Helpful blurbs of advice, rather than a continuing narrative on how to live with another person, how to deal with the typical issues that arise in a relationship, with children, parents, friends, etc.
April 23, 2017
helpful & insightful!
this is a good read for anyone in a relationship, new or old.
this is a good read for anyone in a relationship, new or old.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews