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Childless: Reflections on Life's Longing for Itself
One-quarter to one-third of Australian women are now, and will most likely remain, childless. Here is a book full of intimate insights that take the reader beyond the many myths about why women are going without and how they feel about it.
Forget selfish, ambitious, uncaring and tough. Childless; Reflections on Life's Longing for Itself is about longing and loss, grief and resilience. In it, Gillian Guthrie delves deftly beneath the childless woman's armour of top job, financial independence and oh-so-exciting lifestyle options, finding more often a sadness that is seldom shared - a silent longing for the intangible presence of a child that never was and never will be.
Childless is a tender exploration of a taboo topic; both personal and political.
Forget selfish, ambitious, uncaring and tough. Childless; Reflections on Life's Longing for Itself is about longing and loss, grief and resilience. In it, Gillian Guthrie delves deftly beneath the childless woman's armour of top job, financial independence and oh-so-exciting lifestyle options, finding more often a sadness that is seldom shared - a silent longing for the intangible presence of a child that never was and never will be.
Childless is a tender exploration of a taboo topic; both personal and political.
366 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2012
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Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews
April 21, 2012
This is a marvelous book that covers a vast range of topics related to women who never have children. Guthrie spent many years working in television news before tackling this book that is close to her heart. Married twice to men with problems, she didn’t find a man who would be a suitable father until she was at the end of her fertility and was not able to conceive. To produce this book, she conducted extensive research and called together childless women to meet for Childfree Lunches, where they shared their stories. The resulting book is beautifully written, nicely weaving Guthrie’s own story into the overall picture of childlessness in Australia and the rest of the world. Currently one in four women are childless in her country. Chapters introduce us to all sorts of women without children and explain how they happened to be that way. Guthrie writes about gay women, women in politics who have been trashed for not having children, women who grew up with abusive and/or mentally ill parents, women who suffered through legal and illegal abortions, the grief of childlessness and so much more.
June 15, 2021
"Childless: Reflections on Life's Longing for Itself" by Gillian Guthrie
Good stories from different women who remain childless. It wasn't exactly what I was expecting, but still a good read. It's not selfish if women decide not to have children. It's just that they may have had other priorities and left the idea of having children too late.
One story that resonated with me was on p. 312 when one lady said she was visiting her sister's newborn in the hospital and there was a young infant girl nearby. She had thoughts of actually stealing this baby! Of course, she didn't. But I definitely felt a bit of empathy reading this. There have been so many babies I have loved to raise as my own. And of course, I have not been so desperate to actually steal someone else's child.
Here's a quote on p. 313: "I think there are still women whose self-confidence relies entirely on the fact that they have reproduced or are able to reproduce, and I'm completely against that. We have a right to be even if we aren't producing." I totally agree. Some women feel less of a women if they are infertile. This should never be the case! Women need to know they are valued and important no matter what the status of their uterus may be!
Page 347 tells a woman mentioning that in certain countries, if you have no children, it's a complete conversation stopper. It reminded me of my experience living in Indonesia when anyone asks you if you have a family, instead of saying "No" like most American childless people would say, the correct answer is actually "Not yet" because a simple "No" would be unacceptable.
I have plenty of love to give and use my animals as an outlet for this love. One day, I hope my day will come when I can have a child of my own to spoil, though!
Another point mentioned in this book is that being childless or not having to become a grandparent keeps you ageless. It's actually a very good observation. I find that parents seem to mature easily once they have offsprings to consider. Being that I have never birthed my own children, maybe that's why people who first meet me still think I'm in my twenties. Anyway, I would trade in my young looks for a child any day! It's just crazy that there are many people who have children and don't value them as much as those who long for even the chance to have a live birth.
Good stories from different women who remain childless. It wasn't exactly what I was expecting, but still a good read. It's not selfish if women decide not to have children. It's just that they may have had other priorities and left the idea of having children too late.
One story that resonated with me was on p. 312 when one lady said she was visiting her sister's newborn in the hospital and there was a young infant girl nearby. She had thoughts of actually stealing this baby! Of course, she didn't. But I definitely felt a bit of empathy reading this. There have been so many babies I have loved to raise as my own. And of course, I have not been so desperate to actually steal someone else's child.
Here's a quote on p. 313: "I think there are still women whose self-confidence relies entirely on the fact that they have reproduced or are able to reproduce, and I'm completely against that. We have a right to be even if we aren't producing." I totally agree. Some women feel less of a women if they are infertile. This should never be the case! Women need to know they are valued and important no matter what the status of their uterus may be!
Page 347 tells a woman mentioning that in certain countries, if you have no children, it's a complete conversation stopper. It reminded me of my experience living in Indonesia when anyone asks you if you have a family, instead of saying "No" like most American childless people would say, the correct answer is actually "Not yet" because a simple "No" would be unacceptable.
I have plenty of love to give and use my animals as an outlet for this love. One day, I hope my day will come when I can have a child of my own to spoil, though!
Another point mentioned in this book is that being childless or not having to become a grandparent keeps you ageless. It's actually a very good observation. I find that parents seem to mature easily once they have offsprings to consider. Being that I have never birthed my own children, maybe that's why people who first meet me still think I'm in my twenties. Anyway, I would trade in my young looks for a child any day! It's just crazy that there are many people who have children and don't value them as much as those who long for even the chance to have a live birth.
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews