Danny's Mom

by Elaine Wolf

"You think only students have to deal with bullying and backstabbing in high school? Think again." --Denver Post Friday Night Lights  meets  Ordinary People  when Beth Maller returns to her job as a guidance counselor at Meadow Brook High School shortly after an unspeakable family tragedy. Railing against the everyday injustices she had overlooked until her world cracked apart, Beth stirs up the moral battles being waged in her school, where administrators cling to don't-rock-the-boat policies, homophobia snakes through the halls, and mean girls practice bullying as if it were a sport. As Beth struggles to find her "new normal," she must learn to speak out--risking the very life she's embraced.

Danny's Mom  shows what really can happen behind the closed doors of our schools and our homes. This unforgettable novel, "a must-read for every parent," illustrates who's really responsible when our kids get hurt--and why it's so important to find the strength and courage to do the right thing, no matter what. A great choice for book clubs.

Genres: Fiction, Relationships, Death, Book Club, Young Adult, Grief

256 pages, Hardcover

First published October 23, 2012

About the author

Known as "the anti-bullying novelist," I write about what really goes on behind the closed gates and doors of our camps and schools. The issues I explore in CAMP and DANNY'S MOM are those I am passionate about and know well.

I was a camper and camp counselor for many summers. When I entered "the real world," I taught in public schools in California and New York -- and then I became a district language arts chairperson. One of my greatest joys was getting wonderful books into the hands of students and teachers. In the time before Kindles, iPads, and Nooks, I spent countless hours stocking shelves with "good reads."

My husband and I raised our children on Long Island, where in addition to teaching I was a co-facilitator of an adult writers' workshop. Now we live in western Massachusetts, in a community brimming with readers and writers. I feel as if I'm finally home!

Please visit me online at authorelainewolf.com

Reviews

[Christina Jones · Rating 2 out of 5]

The book was a super quick read - partially because the characters lacked complexity. In Danny's Mom, people are either all good or all bad - nothing inbetween exists.

[Jodie · Rating 5 out of 5]

From the beginning pages on Danny's Mom, Elaine Wolf had me weeping into the pages, my heart feeling the exact pain that Beth Maller felt. When mothers have those gut instincts, you listen to them. Beth was talked out of hers. Because of this, she is now the mother of a child who lies within a grave. I couldn't imagine losing a child, and Elaine has captured that pain inside of Danny's Mom with utmost precision. Unfortunately, Beth doesn't just struggle from the day to day yearning for her son to be back in her life. She lives with a husband who wants to forget it all. Forget the memories, forget all the good times and basically-forget the son they shared together. Danny is what held their family together. Beth now lives in a home where she cannot share her inner feelings and be comforted like she should be.
Feeling somewhat forced back to work, Beth trudges into school and tries desperately to avoid the kids. The same kids who knew her son. The same kids who are just like him. One of the few things that she can take comfort in is knowing that she can make a difference and help those in need. Liz flocks to Beth for help as soon as she arrives to school. She feels comfortable with her and opens up to her. Here's where the problem lies, and here's where I really had issues and this certainly left my temper burning...Liz is not assigned to Beth, therefore, Beth should not help Liz NO MATTER WHAT. She should send her to the person that she is assigned to and that should be that. Unfortunately, Beth feels like I do and continuously listens to Liz and is there for her. This is how it should be. ALL children, kids, young adults, and even grown people should be able to go to whomever they please to speak with someone if they have an issue. If they are getting bullied, they aren't going to feel comfortable telling just anyone. There is a bond that needs to be formed before someone is willing to open up and share their problems.
It becomes ever so obvious that Beth is dealing with a school board that is more concerned with building themselves up and telling others what to do than dealing with real issues at hand. And...she certainly can't go home and discuss it with her husband. Beth needs help just as much as Liz does.


Bullying is something that has always happened. It happens from ranges of young children to adults. The main focus I feel is the adolescent years. That is when our minds are young and impressionable. I am glad to see that we speak more about stopping bullying now and raising awareness but it still isn't going to make it go away. Bullying will always be a problem. PLEASE, if you see someone being bullied, say something, tell someone. Being bullied yourself? Let someone know! That bully could be struggling with their own issues that they need help with. There are so many scenarios. Just don't let them interfere and drag you or someone else down. You have the power to stop it.

[Susan Thuvanuti · Rating 4 out of 5]

Written by a former teacher. Book includes a family tragedy and lots of school politics. Anyone who works or worked in education will find something to relate to in this novel.

[PelicanFreak · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good concept, had the potential to be amazing but not well-executed, and makes for a boring read.

3 stars.
⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️



Audiobook:
Just okay. Narrator sounds a bit robotic.

[Gavin Stephenson-Jackman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beth lost her son in a car accident and she's returned to her job as a councillor at the high school. Memories of Danny and his time at the school haunt her as she struggles with her grief. When homophobia raises its ugly head and the administration refuses to deal with it and the bullying that ensues she's cowered into submission in fear of her job. The administration doesn't want to rock the boat and ruin the school's reputation. Beth learns to seek her mind, risking everything to defend and protect the children. This is an excellent example of why it's important to advocate for the safety of all students and staff in our schools. Bullying and all the phobias need to be addressed to create a just and tolerant society.

[Mary Jane Davis · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mean girls, homophobia and incompetent administrators plague a guidance counselor after she tries to return to work after a family tragedy. Unfortunately the bullying by both students and their parents and the blind eyes of the administration are far too close to reality.

[Pamela Diffee · Rating 4 out of 5]

pretty accurate characters in my opinion! I have worked with many like them. Actually pretty accurate in all aspects

[Gina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Goodreads Description- Beth Maller returns to her job as a high school guidance counselor shortly after her teenage son, Danny, is killed in a car accident. Beth didn't want Danny to drive that snowy night, but her husband insisted the roads were safe. Beth blames him for Danny's death, and she blames herself for allowing fear of confrontation to paralyze her. Now back at work, Beth rails against the everyday injustices she had overlooked until her world cracked open. Her new circumstances cause Beth to become a major player in the moral battles being waged at Meadow Brook High where homophobia snakes through the halls, administrators cling to don't-rock-the-boat policies, and mean girls practice bullying as if it were a sport. While Beth struggles to find her new normal, she learns to speak out, risking her career, her marriage, and the very life she's learned to embrace.

"Danny's Mom" illustrates what really goes on behind the closed doors of our schools, from the perspective of the adults who are charged with keeping our children safe. It is a powerful novel that will appeal to all readers, especially mothers, the millions of adults who work in our schools, and the LGBTQ community."

I read this book in one sitting. It is very short and to the point. The characters aren't well developed but I don't think that's really important to show the reality of what is going on in our schools today. I read quite a few reviews and most people think that the administrators were a little unbelievable with their complete unwillingness to listen to Beth as she rallies to help Liz, a student being bullied by a group of homophobic teens because Liz doesn't think it's right for them to post signs alleging a teacher's sexuality. Due to Liz's beliefs and her actions of taking down the mean posters, the mean students threaten to kill her and attack her in school.

Beth is one of the school counselor and feels guilty over the death of her son Danny and she want to help protect Liz since she wasn't able to protect her own son. The problem is Liz isn't one of Beth's students but Liz only feels comfortable talking to Beth. Bob and Peter, the two school administrators, want to put this whole thing under the rug. If word gets out that homophobia is running rampant and students are getting hurt, it may ruin their chance at promotion. Beth is told repeatedly to leave Liz alone. But she can't ignore a child in need of help. So between Beth's own insecurities and Liz's problems, she takes on Bob and Peter, no matter the price.

Like I said earlier, so many reviewers thought that Bob and Peter were over the top and that no administrator would ignore this kind of problem. But as a 15 year veteran teacher, I can say without a doubt that these problems get pushed under the rug daily! No one wants to deal with bullies because then you have to deal with the bully's parents and the apple doesn't usually fall far from the tree. As a teacher I have been told to ignore it or deal with it myself. And as a mother of children who were bullied, I emailed various administrators and NEVER received one reply. We ended up pulling our kids from the school. The teachers are alone in fighting these battles with little to no support. This is a very real account of what happens behind the scenes at school. Money is also a factor. If it gets out that there is a "problem" at school, schools (especially private) will lose tuition, booster funds, etc... So there is reason to hide these issues from parents.

This is a very good account of what is happening in our schools today. I highly recommend it. I also please beg anyone reading this to give teachers a break when a problem arises. Most good teachers are on it but the lack the support of the higher ups in many cases to do anything. Sad but true. 4 stars!

[Moon Shine Art Spot ~ Lisa · Rating 5 out of 5]

BOOK's blurb:

A compelling and timely novel about a grief-stricken mother who launches a one-woman campaign against bullying in the volatile high school where she works.

Beth Maller returns to her job as a high school guidance counselor shortly after her son, Danny, is killed in a winter car accident. Beth hadn't wanted Danny to drive that snowy night, but her husband insisted the roads were safe. Beth blames him for Danny's death, and she blames herself for allowing fear of confrontation to paralyze her.

Now back at work, Beth rails against the everyday injustices she had overlooked until her world cracked open. Her new circumstances cause Beth to become a major player in the moral battles being waged in Meadow Brook High -- where homophobia snakes through the halls, administrators cling to don't-rock-the-boat policies, and mean girls practice bullying as if it were a sport. While Beth struggles to find her "new normal," she learns to speak out, risking her career and her marriage, the very life she's embraced.

DANNY'S MOM shows what really goes on behind the closed doors of our schools from the perspective of adults who are charged with keeping our children safe. It's a powerful novel that will appeal to mothers (and grandmothers), to the millions of adults who work in our schools, and to the LGBTQ community.

Lisa's thoughts:

I was so lucky to receive an ARC (AdVance reader's copy) of this wonderful book from the author for an honest review. From the beginning, I felt pulled in by Beth's feelings of moral obligation and her feelings that she was responsible for truly helping her students as she had always taught her recently deceased teenager Danny to do in life. Beth's feelings of loss and anger over her son Danny's death is so heart breaking and realistic. The descriptions and emotions will ring true to anyone who has suffered a serious mourning period over a close loved one.

Beth returns to school too early after her son's death and finds herself, as a school counselor, pulled into a teen girl's nightmare of bullying / abuse by other students. The student is not gay, but the teens bullying her have also been involved in posting "hate" signs and such around the school. The student turns to Beth for help, but the school officials who see the problem as linked to the homosexual prejudice want the situation swept under the rug. Beth finds herself having to choose between her career & the safety of one of the students.

Along the way, Beth finds herself also having problems with her husband and realizing that she had cut her husband out of her life years ago because if her closeness with her son. She feels lost at every turn and struggles to do the right thing and figure out how to have a life at all without her son Danny.

This story was very emotional and very inspiring. It had action, suspense, and enough of the real world drama to make me sit up and take notice. Life is full of hard decisions and many opportunities to "do the right thing" that many of us let pass by because of the need to fit in, follow the crowd, or be popular. I truly enjoyed this book and believe it would give many something to think about.

[Vicki · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is one of those books that is hard for me to review. I LOVED her book Camp and was so excited to read this book.

I guess I'll give you the things I liked about this book first. I loved that it had tough subjects like the loss of a child (and how going back to work too soon is not a good idea), bullying among not only kids but adults as well, and marital discord.

I loved reading about the relationship between Beth and her dad. I loved how close they were and that he was always supportive and there for her. I also loved the relationship she had with Callie. Even though they had a few rough patches, Callie was a good friend and was always there for Beth when she needed a friend.

While I sympathized with Beth and the emotions she was feeling after the loss of her son, it was so unbelievable to me that she would allow not only Peter, the vice principle, to treat her the way he did, but also to allow students to talk to her like that. On top of being treated so badly, no one would really listen when she tried to explain anything or ask for help. I can't imagine that she just stood there and took it all. I would have been furious and made them listen instead of just slinking away.

Another problem I had was why she was always doing things her principles told her not to do. It was like she thought she was allowed to just ignore them and do as she pleased.

Then there was the relationship between Beth and Kate, the grandmother who had lost her grandson. It was just strange.

And what was the problem Beth's husband Joe had with her relationship with her father. He didn't like that they talked on the phone almost every day or that they had dinner together quite often. He was her father! You should spend as much time with your family as you can while you have the chance!!

Bottom line, this book was a bit unbelievable. I wanted Beth to stand up for herself and be the guidance counselor she must have been before the loss of her son. I wanted her to report Peter every time he said anything to her that was unacceptable, and if need be, go above the principles head. I wanted her to do everything she could to make sure Tina and her friend stopped bullying Liz. I kept waiting for everything to be made right, but it just didn't happen.

Even though I didn't love the book as much as I thought I would, I'm still glad I read it and I would still read another book by this author. Like I said, I loved her book Camp.

[Elizabeth Ridley · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Anti-bullying novelist” Elaine Wolf has done the seemingly impossible: she follows her terrific YA debut novel CAMP from earlier this year with an even more powerful anti-bullying novel, this time for adults. DANNY’S MOM is set in the early 2000s, in the aftermath of Columbine when many schools were only slowly beginning to realize the insidious causes and long-term effects of bullying, and those few professionals who took the issue seriously, such as DANNY’S MOM protagonist Beth Maller, risked their careers if they dared to speak out.

Beth Maller is a devoted and compassionate high school guidance counselor recently returned to work following the tragic death of her only child, 17-year-old Danny, in a car crash. Beth’s grief is compounded by the blame she assigns to her husband, Joe, who, against Beth’s wishes, allowed Danny to drive on icy roads the night of his accident. Her eyes perhaps opened by grief, Beth takes up the fight against the homophobia, sexism, bullying, eating disorders, and “old boys’ network” that are rife among both students and staff at Meadow Brook High. Through her crusade Beth finds her authentic voice at last, but that discovery comes at a devastating cost to Beth’s personal and professional lives.

While Wolf handles with grace and ease storylines touching on grief, loss, alienation, and emotional violence, the most powerful element of DANNY’S MOM is its achingly vivid portrait of the dissolution of a marriage. With measured, honest, and unflinching emotional detail that recalls the 1980 Oscar-winning movie "Ordinary People," Wolf shows the reader how a supposedly strong marriage can die, slowly and painfully, leaving in its wake a grief as profound as any that would follow an actual physical death.

CAMP and DANNY’S MOM signal the arrival of a major new voice in contemporary American fiction. What will this talented author do next? I, for one, can’t wait to find out.

[Michele Whitecotton · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm not sure how I felt about this book. The idea of the plot made the book sound interesting, but for me it kind of felt a bit short. To me it seemed a little bit unrealistic. I felt very bad for Beth, losing her only child and having her marriage fall apart, but I felt that most of the characters in the book were unnecessarilly mean to her. I don't really think that people would be that insensitive to a person who lost their child. I don't work in the school system but I found it hard to identify with the principal and the vice principal who were so against Beth and her anti-bullying campaign. I think that any administrator in any school would go above and beyond to help a student who was being bullied and the way these characters refused to let Beth help a student because she wasn't within the alphabetized parameters seemed very ridiculous. I also didn't like the lesbian angle between Beth and Kate. I guess it was thrown in to put an added burden on Beth because of the PE teacher incident, but it would have made more sense for Kate to just be a friend who also lost her son and helped Beth pick up the pieces. I mean no disrespect to Ms. Wolf, the writing was great and I would like to read another of her books, this one just didn't work for me.

[Sheryl Medina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Although entertaining, this book was difficult to read because of the direct (and unfortunately, realistic) manner in which some very controversial and sensitive topics were addressed. Homophobia and bullying in schools as well as the loss of a child. As a mother who has lost a child, I could relate to Beth's struggle to find her new normal but thankfully, I could not relate to the lack of empathy that she faced from her coworkers and husband. I literally felt a pain in my heart when her husband threw away her "MOM" coffee mug that her son gave her because he couldn't stand to look at it and she was no longer a Mom so she didn't need it anymore.

Overall, the book makes you really think about how we should treat each other. Do better people.

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

I received this book as an arc. This was a very powerful book that follows the life a school counselor after her son was killed in an accident. Not only does she have to deal with the death of her son and her crumbling marriage, but she also has to struggle with the authorities at her school about certain things that she has been told to leave alone.

This book shows you what can really go on inside our schools, and how those who work in them have to struggle with doing what they know is right and the consequences of going against authority.

I would highly recommend this book.

[Mrs Mommy Booknerd http://mrsmommybooknerd.blogspot.com · Rating 5 out of 5]

“Be the change you want to see in the world.” -Mahatma Gandhi


Wow, Wolf again writes a beautiful and heartbreaking story of loss, justice and redemption. Wolf, the anti-bullying author, tackles some very tough topics in this 5 stars novel that should be read by all. I feel that this novel with invoke change and encourage people to speak up against bullying and other injustices. I applaud Wolf and her ability to write such honest, moving and important work. Go out and get your copy today, read it and then share it with others!!!

[Joyce · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting story, but sort of unbelievable in how the teachers and school counselors were treated by the administration.

If that is an accurate description of how schools are run, I don't know why anyone would teach.

Why the women in this story put up with the crap they did from the administration is puzzling and infuriating.
Sounded more like the 1950's than 2012.

The part of the book describing the grief from losing a child and its effect on the marriage is sad. It mirrors just about every other story I've read about how this impacts the parents.

[Micki · Rating 5 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to read this as an ARC and was not disappointed. Elaine Wolf has once again taken on the subject of bullying, but this time the setting is one of the most common places where bullying occurs: high school.

In Danny's Mom, high school counselor Beth Maller no longer accepts the cruelty of bullies when she returns to work after the loss of her son. Beth not only takes on the the student bullies, but also takes on those disguised as school administrators.

[Jill Zitzewitz · Rating 2 out of 5]

I'm not sure why, but for some reason this book didn't seem very believable to me. Maybe I'm too much of a Pollyanna to appreciate it. Sentence structure was also too choppy for a girl who can't event text except in full sentences. I sort of wish I had liked the book more because the premise sounded interesting to me.

[InYourFaceNewYorker · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very thought-provoking read about bullying, social politics, and sticking to one's principles. It also focuses on how we tend not to try to solve problems in general until they get out of hand.

[Missy Miller · Rating 1 out of 5]

The dialogue was forced, the plot is(?) slow, underdeveloped, and incredible in the truest sense. As were the characters. The dialogue was just ... excruciating at times.

[Shelly Walker · Rating 2 out of 5]

I couldn’t stand most of the characters and can’t believe a person like Peter could remain in his position with the way he talked to and treated people.

[Cori Bravo · Rating 1 out of 5]

Yuck. Probably the worst book I’ve ever read. Not one likeable character. Nothing was believable, no plot and no character development. Just don’t.

[Tracy Barton · Rating 2 out of 5]

This sounded like it was going to be so interesting and intense. It was actually a little underwhelming..... it seemed to go on and on, not really saying much new, for chapter after chapter. Basically a mom dealing with the loss of her son, her marriage is falling apart, and she's struggling at work. It could have been shorter, or maybe it just could have been a little more interesting. I don't know. I guess the writing itself was sub-par to me. It almost had that Twilight/Fifty Shades feel to it.

Worse, the audiobook version was borderline awful! The narrator often sounded like she was sucking on a piece of candy, or like there was something in her mouth--tucked into her cheek. Also, I could often hear her sort of swallowing, or the breath one takes immediately after swallowing. These are not sounds I often think about, and they're not the sounds I WANT to be thinking about when I'm trying to follow along with a story!

[MJ · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a hard book to get through. The description does a good job of trying to prepare you for the novel but I left with a feeling of overwhelming sadness, anger, and, honestly, a level of fear. I know all of the characters in this story personally, which is where my fear comes from. I know Peter and unabashed homophobia. I know Cassie and her jealousy-fueled warnings to Beth equally matched by her unwavering support. I know Mrs. Richardson and her belief that if she keeps quiet and personal life just that, personal, things will get better. I know Joe a father filled with rage and grief. I am incredibly glad that I chose to pick up this book last night at random. Danny's Mom is going to stay with me for a long time.

[Nicole · Rating 3 out of 5]

So torn with a review for this one! I want to give it a 1 for the bitchy, homophobic High School girls getting zero repressions for their actions and ditto with the shitty administration. But if red hot rage is what the author was going for then 5+!! It all seemed completely unbelievable but in this day and age I wouldn't be surprised if these kind of things are going down behind closed doors. I sure the hell hope not though!!!
It's a quick listen, share your rage with me if you do give it a go!

[Tori · Rating 3 out of 5]

I understand that this book is about o e woman’s journey through grief but I get so frustrated reading about women who should just speak up. If everyone just stood up to the bullies maybe there would have been no book. Beth saying she probably should call her Union when she started getting bullied by Bob and Peter was exactly what she should have done. Adults acting like children and children growing up to be mean adults.

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book and felt like it had a lot of potential. It dragged quite a bit and by the end of the book I was disappointed. I thought it went from pretty steady to now the main character thinks she might be attracted to an elderly lady? The author was very successful in making me want to punch Peter!

[Cynthia · Rating 2 out of 5]

Okay at best. Gets a little interesting towards the end. I thought this would be about the Lost of a child, however it’s really about unrealistic points of use from a teacher who apparently gets bullied by kids. I’m not a teacher so I don’t exactly know what it’s about but some of the themes and wording seems far-fetched.

[Lisa Kutra · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a quick read. I liked the idea of the book but I agree with so many who said the way the administration and students talked to be was unlikely and far fetched . That part was disappointing to me .

[Mary-lou Rosengren · Rating 5 out of 5]

This one touched me as a mother but also clearly showed how easily our lives can be affected by gossip and lies. Believable characters and a plot that kept me turning the pages.