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Crossing Fifty-One: Not Quite a Memoir
Three Generations of Family Secrets and Midlife Crises All Set the Stage for One Dream to Come True.
A week before Christmas 1951, Dr. Ralph Russell risked everything to voluntarily enter a locked federal drug-treatment facility known as a "narcotic farm."
Sixty-five years later, Dr. Russell's granddaughter Debbie suffers a debilitating crisis of identity when her father (Dr. Russell's oldest son), always her biggest fan, is accepted into hospice.
Debbie's investigation into her paternal lineage reveals family secrets and ignites her mother's volatile outbursts, propelling her into therapy.
When therapy fails her, the grandfather Debbie never knew saves her, and she collaborates with her dying father one last time to make her biggest dream come true.
Crossing Fifty-One pulls back the curtain on the internal struggles of midlife and provides a blueprint for redefining one's self beyond the constraints of addiction and dysfunctional family dynamics.
A week before Christmas 1951, Dr. Ralph Russell risked everything to voluntarily enter a locked federal drug-treatment facility known as a "narcotic farm."
Sixty-five years later, Dr. Russell's granddaughter Debbie suffers a debilitating crisis of identity when her father (Dr. Russell's oldest son), always her biggest fan, is accepted into hospice.
Debbie's investigation into her paternal lineage reveals family secrets and ignites her mother's volatile outbursts, propelling her into therapy.
When therapy fails her, the grandfather Debbie never knew saves her, and she collaborates with her dying father one last time to make her biggest dream come true.
Crossing Fifty-One pulls back the curtain on the internal struggles of midlife and provides a blueprint for redefining one's self beyond the constraints of addiction and dysfunctional family dynamics.
- GenresMemoirNonfiction
331 pages, Kindle Edition
Published June 20, 2023
7 people are currently reading
2126 people want to read
About the author
Debbie Russell
1 book32 followersDebbie Russell is a lawyer turned writer. She spent twenty-five years as an Assistant County Attorney in Minneapolis, prosecuting numerous high-profile cases and fighting off several nervous breakdowns. At age fifty-five, Debbie took early retirement, giving up a full pension for the freedom of time. She now spends that precious time writing, restoring her property to native prairie and wetlands, and training her rambunctious retrievers.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 40 reviews
June 28, 2023
Full Disclosure: I’ve known Debbie Russell a long time.
The person I admired growing up turns out to have had many of the same issues as I did along the way. One of the smartest people I’ve ever known, I always imagined Debbie lived an idyllic life. After reading her book, I understand that Debbie is just like me - truthfully, probably like the rest of us. She just got much better grades because they were her vehicle away from home.
When I signed up for Goodreads, among the genres I selected were nonfiction, biography, history, and memoir. Debbie’s first book fits all of those genre’s in one way or another.
I learned about the history of substance abuse treatment in the United States.
I learned about family dynamics from within and without Debbie’s own family.
I learned about the shortcomings of mental health support even with all we know.
I learned about Debbie’s father and grandfather - their unique relationship and how one man’s decisions can impact their entire family, in general, and and their son, specifically.
I learned about episodes from Debbie’s own story that allowed me to see her in a different light. Debbie would probably tell you she considers us peers. I always considered her my superior and “above-the-fray.” Her story led to many nights of introspection and many, many conversations with her via Facebook Messenger.
When you finish reading this book, I hope you will have taken the same rollercoaster ride I did.
Debbie lays bare truths about her family and life in a raw, authentic voice. Debbie ticks off historical events and supports them with primary source documents. Debbie “curiouses” her way through discarded and long-forgotten boxes, letters, photos, and other family artifacts. Debbie paints such a compelling picture that after reading the last page I immediately picked up my phone and asked my last remaining question: Whatever happened with…
I’ll leave you to ask your own questions at the end of Crossing Fifty-One. I’m sure your own curiosity will leave you with many.
My wife and I will sometimes look at each other and say, “Everyone else is weird. We are the only normal ones.” If helps us to feel better about ourselves.
But here’s the thing…Everyone - all of us - have hidden truths and unsuspected turns in our story. Never judge someone by outward appearances because we never truly know someone until we ask them and they talk to us. I plan to speak with Debbie more about this topic. Who knows what more I’ll learn about myself through the lens of Debbie’s stories?
The person I admired growing up turns out to have had many of the same issues as I did along the way. One of the smartest people I’ve ever known, I always imagined Debbie lived an idyllic life. After reading her book, I understand that Debbie is just like me - truthfully, probably like the rest of us. She just got much better grades because they were her vehicle away from home.
When I signed up for Goodreads, among the genres I selected were nonfiction, biography, history, and memoir. Debbie’s first book fits all of those genre’s in one way or another.
I learned about the history of substance abuse treatment in the United States.
I learned about family dynamics from within and without Debbie’s own family.
I learned about the shortcomings of mental health support even with all we know.
I learned about Debbie’s father and grandfather - their unique relationship and how one man’s decisions can impact their entire family, in general, and and their son, specifically.
I learned about episodes from Debbie’s own story that allowed me to see her in a different light. Debbie would probably tell you she considers us peers. I always considered her my superior and “above-the-fray.” Her story led to many nights of introspection and many, many conversations with her via Facebook Messenger.
When you finish reading this book, I hope you will have taken the same rollercoaster ride I did.
Debbie lays bare truths about her family and life in a raw, authentic voice. Debbie ticks off historical events and supports them with primary source documents. Debbie “curiouses” her way through discarded and long-forgotten boxes, letters, photos, and other family artifacts. Debbie paints such a compelling picture that after reading the last page I immediately picked up my phone and asked my last remaining question: Whatever happened with…
I’ll leave you to ask your own questions at the end of Crossing Fifty-One. I’m sure your own curiosity will leave you with many.
My wife and I will sometimes look at each other and say, “Everyone else is weird. We are the only normal ones.” If helps us to feel better about ourselves.
But here’s the thing…Everyone - all of us - have hidden truths and unsuspected turns in our story. Never judge someone by outward appearances because we never truly know someone until we ask them and they talk to us. I plan to speak with Debbie more about this topic. Who knows what more I’ll learn about myself through the lens of Debbie’s stories?
April 12, 2023
Most readers who have watched a loved one’s struggles and inevitable decline will find this book both beautiful and painful. It is very much worth your time and heart’s attention to travel through this family’s emotional inroads into drug addiction, disease, and mental illness, highlighting one man’s courage to reach out for help in an era when the stigma of such things would stop an ordinary person from taking necessary action. Family dynamics make this story poignant. The use of personal letters is an effective way to make this story vividly real.
May 7, 2023
When I first read "Crossing Fifty-One" I could not put it down--literally. I went cover to cover, and was completely riveted. Having seen family members struggle with addiction, I could only imagine what "Papa" endured, not to mention his family.
Throughout this book the author paints pictures with her words that take the reader in to the family dynamics--both her father's family and her immediate family--in a most compelling and thought-provoking way. Anyone who has dealt with challenging family dynamics at some point in their lives (and who hasn't?) will benefit from reading this book.
Throughout this book the author paints pictures with her words that take the reader in to the family dynamics--both her father's family and her immediate family--in a most compelling and thought-provoking way. Anyone who has dealt with challenging family dynamics at some point in their lives (and who hasn't?) will benefit from reading this book.
April 11, 2023
I received an advance reader copy from the author and am so grateful to have had a chance to devour this splendid new memoir. Formed in part around correspondence from her relatives, the book tells a poignant and universal story. Family dynamics, addiction, and the author's investigative (retired prosecutor) mind team up to make this a great read.
April 9, 2023
Debbie weaves an interesting tapestry that juxtaposes her grandfather’s journey during a tumultuous time in his life with her own trials and tribulations as they both cross the age of 51. Well written, this book highlights what we can learn about ourselves by first understanding who we came from. I think many readers will relate to Debbie’s story.
June 20, 2023
I enjoyed Crossing 51 immensely. The author brought to life four generations of Russells; Great Grandfather—Calvin Russell, Papa—Ralph Russell Sr, Dad—Ralph Russell Jr, and herself. This, all inspired from a box of dusty memorabilia that had been passed on down until it landed in her Bungalow basement, well it shows dedication and love for both discovery, understanding and relating to her past ancestors. Her Papa’s letters saved from the past, and her ability to piece them together to construct a story was the first outstanding feat. How she was able to then compare and contrast her Papa’s story to her own present day mid-life crisis was her second feat. Finally, to weave between past and present to make sense of the crossroads she found herself as her Dad was facing his end of life, well that was her masterpiece!
To be part of a family today is to know some type of dysfunction. Debbie shared vulnerabilities throughout Crossing 51 which helped me trust her and relate to her family story. I also see parallels in my own history. My story is different, but it is a story worth remembering. Possibly worth documenting. Debbie has inspired me to think about this.
Crossing 51 is a rich story that covers addiction, family dysfunction, grief, fear, aging, breaking down, being human, and finally love, redemption and healing.
To be part of a family today is to know some type of dysfunction. Debbie shared vulnerabilities throughout Crossing 51 which helped me trust her and relate to her family story. I also see parallels in my own history. My story is different, but it is a story worth remembering. Possibly worth documenting. Debbie has inspired me to think about this.
Crossing 51 is a rich story that covers addiction, family dysfunction, grief, fear, aging, breaking down, being human, and finally love, redemption and healing.
June 3, 2025
Debbie Russell, a former assistant county attorney in Minneapolis, turns writer with her debut novel, a multigenerational family saga, "Crossing-Fifty-One." As Russell takes a deep dive into her family genealogy, she discovers buried family secrets, unexpected generational connections, disease, mental illness, and drug addiction. Russell has learned to navigate within a dysfunctional family as she deals with self-identity issues and coping with ever-changing family dynamics. She is resolute in knowing and understanding her family legacy so she can take positive steps to move forward. Readers can't help but admire the author's candid conversations in the book and the tenacity she displays in seeking answers to some of the gaps in her lineage. Russell's narrative is raw and transparent as she puts herself out there for readers while grappling with her own self-worth. She finds her life at an intersection, crossing 51 to 52, trying to make sense of it all.
Boxes of books and family memorabilia, inherited when her parents downsized their home, inspired her quest. She used her innate investigative skills, peeling back the layers of four generations of the Russell family: Great-Grandfather Calvin, Papa Ralph Russell Sr., her dad Ralph Russell Jr. She discovered unexpected threads and similarities between generations. Using that information and public records, she was able to fill in the missing blanks as well as ongoing conversations with her father and his sister, Ann. Her story is two interlocking narratives told through actual family letters and miscellaneous memorabilia from the past about her grandfather's substance abuse circa 1951 and her current perspectives dealing with an ailing father suffering from Parkinsons with impending death, coping with a self-absorbed cold mother lacking a nurturing spirit, and a brother who seemed to distance himself from the family. Russell's father was her shining star and champion. He provided her with unending support, optimism, and kindness, which nourished her emotional needs, giving her the stability she longed for.
Russell's experiences will likely resonate with those in caregiving positions and those who deal with mental health issues. The use of actual family letters and files gives the story a feeling of authenticity. Her book underscores the importance for families to capture and record their stories as a legacy, no matter how small or large. My biggest takeaway from reading Russell's book: "Your Family Story Matters."
Boxes of books and family memorabilia, inherited when her parents downsized their home, inspired her quest. She used her innate investigative skills, peeling back the layers of four generations of the Russell family: Great-Grandfather Calvin, Papa Ralph Russell Sr., her dad Ralph Russell Jr. She discovered unexpected threads and similarities between generations. Using that information and public records, she was able to fill in the missing blanks as well as ongoing conversations with her father and his sister, Ann. Her story is two interlocking narratives told through actual family letters and miscellaneous memorabilia from the past about her grandfather's substance abuse circa 1951 and her current perspectives dealing with an ailing father suffering from Parkinsons with impending death, coping with a self-absorbed cold mother lacking a nurturing spirit, and a brother who seemed to distance himself from the family. Russell's father was her shining star and champion. He provided her with unending support, optimism, and kindness, which nourished her emotional needs, giving her the stability she longed for.
Russell's experiences will likely resonate with those in caregiving positions and those who deal with mental health issues. The use of actual family letters and files gives the story a feeling of authenticity. Her book underscores the importance for families to capture and record their stories as a legacy, no matter how small or large. My biggest takeaway from reading Russell's book: "Your Family Story Matters."
May 25, 2023
Debbie Russell’s “Crossing Fifty-one” is an engrossing memoir that reads like a mystery novel. Russell receives boxes of family papers and letters. Busy with her life as a criminal prosecutor in Minneapolis, she doesn’t look at them for 10 years. But when she does, as she approaches crossing 51 years, she sees that it contains a cache of letters from her paternal grandfather to his wife and children, including Russell’s father, after checking himself into a US Public Health Service narcotics farm for drug addicts as he, too, was crossing 51.
Dr. Ralph Russell had established one hospital in Nebraska, then moved with his young family to open a practice in San Diego. But Dr. Russell suffered from severe asthma and became hooked on his Demerol medication. Just before Christmas 1951, and with no warning to his wife and children, he checked himself into the federal facility in Texas.
While Debbie Russell is poring over the boxes' contents, she is navigating the declining health of her beloved father while managing her mother, a cold, self-absorbed woman who sees the worst in everyone, including her loved ones. Chapters move easily between her grandfather’s 1950s letters to Debbie's own struggles primarily since 2015. Her mother’s sarcasm, guilt trips and inability to provide her children with motherly love eventually pushes the author to seek counseling.
But the files, and some conversations with her father and his sister, begin to reveal deep family secrets that her mother kept hidden. A major drug-selling charge against her father. Help from a top Eisenhower Administration official. But the best secret is an indomitable spirit manifested in Dr. Russell that was passed on to his son and, Debbie hopes, to herself.
Russell uses her skills as a prosecutor to dig up long forgotten public records that fill in blanks in the memories and letters of her family. As a prosecutor would lay out the story to a jury, connecting all of the evidence, Russell likewise does it with her memoir. And just when you think all has been revealed and she is beginning the smooth glide to the story’s end, she has a dramatic session with her therapist that threatens to undo the progress she has made. I highly recommend it.
Dr. Ralph Russell had established one hospital in Nebraska, then moved with his young family to open a practice in San Diego. But Dr. Russell suffered from severe asthma and became hooked on his Demerol medication. Just before Christmas 1951, and with no warning to his wife and children, he checked himself into the federal facility in Texas.
While Debbie Russell is poring over the boxes' contents, she is navigating the declining health of her beloved father while managing her mother, a cold, self-absorbed woman who sees the worst in everyone, including her loved ones. Chapters move easily between her grandfather’s 1950s letters to Debbie's own struggles primarily since 2015. Her mother’s sarcasm, guilt trips and inability to provide her children with motherly love eventually pushes the author to seek counseling.
But the files, and some conversations with her father and his sister, begin to reveal deep family secrets that her mother kept hidden. A major drug-selling charge against her father. Help from a top Eisenhower Administration official. But the best secret is an indomitable spirit manifested in Dr. Russell that was passed on to his son and, Debbie hopes, to herself.
Russell uses her skills as a prosecutor to dig up long forgotten public records that fill in blanks in the memories and letters of her family. As a prosecutor would lay out the story to a jury, connecting all of the evidence, Russell likewise does it with her memoir. And just when you think all has been revealed and she is beginning the smooth glide to the story’s end, she has a dramatic session with her therapist that threatens to undo the progress she has made. I highly recommend it.
April 11, 2023
'Crossing 51' is unique among novels in the Memoir genre. As the author attempts to balance concern for her father’s imminent demise, she consumes herself in the random archival history he has documented through saved correspondence. This spurs further discovery into her genealogy, and she devours an old volume created by her great-grandfather. In his own words, a man of destiny, great-grandfather Calvin’s egotistical and somewhat chauvinistic accounting of himself displays characteristics, both positive and negative, that the author sees in herself. These DNA-inspired qualities collide with geography and era-related circumstances to create an interesting history passed down to the following generation.
Grandfather Ralph Russel, MD, builds on the wealth of his father’s lifetime experiences and sires the author’s father, Ralph Jr. Junior is a mild-mannered and gentle soul, domineered by an assertive wife. He manages modest business success but is a loving father. As the author analyzes the male-dominated history of her family, she nevertheless recognizes the influences of the women in her heredity as well. She begins to understand the scientific foundations of her own basket of genetically-influenced strengths and weaknesses.
As readers, we are struck by the similarities of our treks through life, not the differences. How we utilize ancestral qualities passed to us from generations before to adapt to the specific stimuli of contemporary environments determines our ultimate success or failure. Those who read "Crossing 51" for a vicarious tour of the author’s life will miss the point, for the book is not about her. It is about us.
Grandfather Ralph Russel, MD, builds on the wealth of his father’s lifetime experiences and sires the author’s father, Ralph Jr. Junior is a mild-mannered and gentle soul, domineered by an assertive wife. He manages modest business success but is a loving father. As the author analyzes the male-dominated history of her family, she nevertheless recognizes the influences of the women in her heredity as well. She begins to understand the scientific foundations of her own basket of genetically-influenced strengths and weaknesses.
As readers, we are struck by the similarities of our treks through life, not the differences. How we utilize ancestral qualities passed to us from generations before to adapt to the specific stimuli of contemporary environments determines our ultimate success or failure. Those who read "Crossing 51" for a vicarious tour of the author’s life will miss the point, for the book is not about her. It is about us.
June 20, 2023
"Crossing Fifty-One: Not Quite a Memoir" written by the author Debbie Russell is an intriguing read. In this portrayal of complex family dynamics and long-buried secrets, we get to know about the author's life and the legacy of her grandfather, Dr. Ralph Russell who entered a federal drug-treatment facility known as a narcotic farm in the 1950s.
Debbie got to know about the memoir of his great-grandfather "Life Story of Calvin Parker Russell: Western Pioneer and Ranchman". One copy of it was passed to Debbie's dad and she gladly took it from him. Debbie's dad was diagnosed with Parkinson when he was seventy-six. Debbie being a good and responsible daughter has elevated her dad's morale at times.
Debbie and her mother are different but with her father growing weaker day by day, they need to be in the same team and make decisions that are best for him. The family drama included in the story could make you relate with your family issues as many times our family keeps secrets from us even though we don't want anything to be secret in a family. The letters from the members of her family that Debbie has included in this memoir are interesting to read.
Those who love reading memoirs with many characters should get their hands on this one. The author has well detailed everything in this book. The title of the book is suitable and it is written well. This book gave me a sneak peek into the struggles of midlife crisis and the dysfunctional family.
Debbie got to know about the memoir of his great-grandfather "Life Story of Calvin Parker Russell: Western Pioneer and Ranchman". One copy of it was passed to Debbie's dad and she gladly took it from him. Debbie's dad was diagnosed with Parkinson when he was seventy-six. Debbie being a good and responsible daughter has elevated her dad's morale at times.
Debbie and her mother are different but with her father growing weaker day by day, they need to be in the same team and make decisions that are best for him. The family drama included in the story could make you relate with your family issues as many times our family keeps secrets from us even though we don't want anything to be secret in a family. The letters from the members of her family that Debbie has included in this memoir are interesting to read.
Those who love reading memoirs with many characters should get their hands on this one. The author has well detailed everything in this book. The title of the book is suitable and it is written well. This book gave me a sneak peek into the struggles of midlife crisis and the dysfunctional family.
May 16, 2023
Ths heartfelt Memoir skillfully weaves a narrative from multiple generations of author Debbie Russell's family, detailing her own elderly parents' trials with Parkinson's; her great grandfather's discovered volume detailing his egotistical telling of his exploits; her grandfather's struggle with and treatment for drug abuse; and her own struggles of coping with her ailing, benevolent father, and her very flawed mother and brother, while dealing with anxiety, stress and burnout herself.
The title comes from Ms. Russell's crossing the age of 51, ironically the same age of her grandfather when he began drug abuse treatment in a facility describe as much hospital as prison.
Having a close relative with Parkinson's, I could relate all too well to the struggles both the patient and caregivers undergo, which the author captures vividly.
Ms. Russell honestly discusses her own efforts at self assistance through psychotherapy including her frustrations with undergoing hours of treatment and wondering if she was getting anywhere.
This book will have a broad appeal to most of us who are dealing with family relationships, our own life changes and coping mechanisms, and the universal truths discovered by living.
I was given an Advanced Review Copy (ARC) by the author in exchange for an honest review.
The title comes from Ms. Russell's crossing the age of 51, ironically the same age of her grandfather when he began drug abuse treatment in a facility describe as much hospital as prison.
Having a close relative with Parkinson's, I could relate all too well to the struggles both the patient and caregivers undergo, which the author captures vividly.
Ms. Russell honestly discusses her own efforts at self assistance through psychotherapy including her frustrations with undergoing hours of treatment and wondering if she was getting anywhere.
This book will have a broad appeal to most of us who are dealing with family relationships, our own life changes and coping mechanisms, and the universal truths discovered by living.
I was given an Advanced Review Copy (ARC) by the author in exchange for an honest review.
July 11, 2023
“Crossing Fifty-One” – a treasure trove of family history lovingly told
“Crossing Fifty-One” by lawyer turned writer, Debbie Russell is a story (or, as the subtitle reads, “not quite a memoir”) about the author’s quest to gain a better understanding of herself, her motivations, her moods and anxieties as she reaches a crossroads in her personal and professional life. She does this with lawyer-like precision and discovery skills and unearths a treasure trove of family history found in letters and audio tapes preserved in boxes by first her paternal grandfather (Papa) who handed them down to her father (Dad).
Through the contents in the letters and documents found in the boxes, lots of personal reflection, and the help of a trusted therapist she was able to learn from whence she came, the parallels between her personal struggles and those of her grandfather’s and her father’s, so she could bring understanding and order to her life and move forward to the peaceful, productive state of contentment she so enjoys today – AND, bring this touching book of discovery, love and devotion and acceptance to print for others to learn from and share with those who could benefit from what she’s written.
“Crossing Fifty-One” by lawyer turned writer, Debbie Russell is a story (or, as the subtitle reads, “not quite a memoir”) about the author’s quest to gain a better understanding of herself, her motivations, her moods and anxieties as she reaches a crossroads in her personal and professional life. She does this with lawyer-like precision and discovery skills and unearths a treasure trove of family history found in letters and audio tapes preserved in boxes by first her paternal grandfather (Papa) who handed them down to her father (Dad).
Through the contents in the letters and documents found in the boxes, lots of personal reflection, and the help of a trusted therapist she was able to learn from whence she came, the parallels between her personal struggles and those of her grandfather’s and her father’s, so she could bring understanding and order to her life and move forward to the peaceful, productive state of contentment she so enjoys today – AND, bring this touching book of discovery, love and devotion and acceptance to print for others to learn from and share with those who could benefit from what she’s written.
June 25, 2024
"Crossing 51" by Debbie Russell is a heartfelt memoir that explores that weaves together poignant reflections on family, love, and resilience.
So many readers who have witnessed a loved one's challenges and unavoidable deterioration will discover this book to be a poignant and stirring story of drug addiction, illness, and mental health issues. "Crossing Fifty-One" emphasizes one man's bravery in seeking assistance during a time when societal stigma often deterred people from seeking necessary help. The portrayal of family relationships adds depth and emotion to the narrative, while the inclusion of personal letters effectively brings the story to life with vivid authenticity.
The memoir is marked by Russell's ability to evoke a deep sense of place and emotion. Her prose is honest and introspective, offering readers a raw and authentic glimpse into her life's pivotal moments. From poignant family dynamics to personal growth and self-discovery, Russell's narrative is both relatable and inspiring.
Overall, "Crossing 51" is a compelling memoir that resonates on multiple levels. Debbie Russell's narrative prowess and emotional depth make it a captivating read for anyone drawn to stories of personal transformation and resilience in the face of adversity.
So many readers who have witnessed a loved one's challenges and unavoidable deterioration will discover this book to be a poignant and stirring story of drug addiction, illness, and mental health issues. "Crossing Fifty-One" emphasizes one man's bravery in seeking assistance during a time when societal stigma often deterred people from seeking necessary help. The portrayal of family relationships adds depth and emotion to the narrative, while the inclusion of personal letters effectively brings the story to life with vivid authenticity.
The memoir is marked by Russell's ability to evoke a deep sense of place and emotion. Her prose is honest and introspective, offering readers a raw and authentic glimpse into her life's pivotal moments. From poignant family dynamics to personal growth and self-discovery, Russell's narrative is both relatable and inspiring.
Overall, "Crossing 51" is a compelling memoir that resonates on multiple levels. Debbie Russell's narrative prowess and emotional depth make it a captivating read for anyone drawn to stories of personal transformation and resilience in the face of adversity.
November 5, 2023
Crossing Fifty-One is a soul-searching memoir by Debbie Russell about the expected loss of the author’s father who enters hospice care. When she reads a box of letters between “Papa,” her grandfather when he is 51, and his nuclear family, Russell confronts her living relatives about the content. Papa’s letters contain mundane news sprinkled with honesty about his addiction recovery path at a “narcotic farm.” The grandmother struggles between the lines, as does her own father.
While the book focuses on career goals on the paternal side, it also explores Russell’s relationship with her mother. The structure weaves family correspondence with the author’s fascination about taboo topics. Also interspersed are therapist’s notes about Russell’s mental journey during this period. The memoir bounces back to her father’s daily hospice care and tender moments alone with him.
Russell bravely and creatively details her journey at age 51. After reading this book, one may be compelled to bring up sensitive topics with a senior relative. It's a story that encourages honest conversations before it's too late.
While the book focuses on career goals on the paternal side, it also explores Russell’s relationship with her mother. The structure weaves family correspondence with the author’s fascination about taboo topics. Also interspersed are therapist’s notes about Russell’s mental journey during this period. The memoir bounces back to her father’s daily hospice care and tender moments alone with him.
Russell bravely and creatively details her journey at age 51. After reading this book, one may be compelled to bring up sensitive topics with a senior relative. It's a story that encourages honest conversations before it's too late.
April 12, 2023
I truly enjoyed this epistolary memoir as I call it. The author weaves three narratives together skillfully: her grandfather's journey to a narcotics farm as a doctor who became addicted while treating himself for asthma, her journey to understand him through the letters he left behind, and the end of life journey with her own father. Debbie never got to know her grandfather as he died young, but learns from his life lessons and letters. That someone could reach out from the past and influence not only your own decisions, but your identify and perception of yourself is truly amazing and heartfelt. I learned a lot. The mother is the antagonist in the story and we learn from her as well - mostly what not to be like. I'd recommend this book if you would like insight into a simpler era (her grandfather's) and into Debbie's own navigations through the complicated world we now find ourselves in. I received an ARC copy in exchange for an honest review.
May 17, 2023
Thorough research and intense introspection make Crossing Fifty-One: Not Quite a Memoir a compelling book. Delving through mounds of letters and memories, author Debbie Russell seeks a foundation for her discovery of self and an examination of her upbringing. In her search, she finds multiple parallels between her own optimism and view of the world and those of her grandfather, who bravely fought an addiction, and her father, who persevered in a difficult marriage. These discoveries strengthen her and lead her to forge a future that expands her world.
It is not an easy thing to expose one's past before an unknown audience, and Debbie Russell approaches this task with determination and aplomb. She succeeds and her efforts will inspire others to dig deep into their lives to find meaning and understanding of those we love.
I was privileged to be an ARC reader in exchange for an honest review.
It is not an easy thing to expose one's past before an unknown audience, and Debbie Russell approaches this task with determination and aplomb. She succeeds and her efforts will inspire others to dig deep into their lives to find meaning and understanding of those we love.
I was privileged to be an ARC reader in exchange for an honest review.
August 24, 2024
I was deeply moved by the evocative and personal nature of Crossing Fifty-One. The author's exploration of family secrets, self-discovery, and unresolved legacies resonates powerfully, making her journey both fascinating and inspiring. Debbie Russell’s portrayal of navigating a midlife crisis against the backdrop of historical and personal challenges is both compelling and relatable.
I found it particularly intriguing to learn about Debbie’s grandfather's voluntary admission to a federal drug-treatment facility. Despite the story unfolding decades ago, its relevance endures, offering valuable insights into the experiences of individuals and how treatment has evolved over time.
I highly recommend Crossing Fifty-One to anyone interested in the intersection of history and personal connections. It’s a thought-provoking read that offers a rich exploration of how our past shapes our present.
I found it particularly intriguing to learn about Debbie’s grandfather's voluntary admission to a federal drug-treatment facility. Despite the story unfolding decades ago, its relevance endures, offering valuable insights into the experiences of individuals and how treatment has evolved over time.
I highly recommend Crossing Fifty-One to anyone interested in the intersection of history and personal connections. It’s a thought-provoking read that offers a rich exploration of how our past shapes our present.
April 27, 2023
I read this book in one sitting. It's a story of anticipatory grief and being almost in a holding pattern while your life changes around you. This book is more than a story of love and loss, though. It's a story of how the author's father is a bridge between her and the grandfather she never knew. Both she and her grandfather are taking back control of their lives as they "cross 51". While the struggles they overcome are uniquely individual, underneath they have the same core--be true to yourself, fix what is broken when you can, and choose the life you want to live. And along the way? It's a love letter to her Dad and ultimately, to herself. This book is one of insight, of family dynamics, and of rediscovery--both of those around you, those that live in family lore, and ultimately, yourself.
June 7, 2023
My favorite part of the book was following the bond between the author and her father. The times and conversations that they had with each other – especially when her mother wasn’t around to steer the conversation in a different direction. I could feel my body clenching as Debbie and her father had to use every moment, while her mother was not present, to be open and honest with each other. For me as the reader, it was the right amount of history mixed with present time. Every family has their unique struggles. Debbie’s willingness to be open and honest is a great example of life not being perfect, but you make the best out of what you have. Her raw honesty and transparency in regards to her relationship with her Mother couldn't have been easy to put to paper. I took the book with me on vacation and read it cover to cover in three days – I truly didn’t want to put it down
November 30, 2025
Crossing fifty-one: not quite a memoir by Debbie Russell
In 1951 Dr. Ralph Russell risked it all and voluntarily entered a locked federal drug-treatment facility know as a "narcotic farm".
Sixty-five years later, Dr. Russell's granddaughter Debbie (Dr. Russell's oldest son) is accepted into hospice.
Debbie's investigation into her lineage reveals family secrets and ignited her mother's outbursts, sending her into therapy. When therapy fails, the grandfather Debbie never knew ends up saving her. She collaborates with her dying father one last time to make her dreams come true.
I like how this book layed out the facts about the relationships and did so without shame or blaming the people in them. The multi-generational aspect made this story so much more rich.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion and review.
#crossingfiftyone #netgalley
In 1951 Dr. Ralph Russell risked it all and voluntarily entered a locked federal drug-treatment facility know as a "narcotic farm".
Sixty-five years later, Dr. Russell's granddaughter Debbie (Dr. Russell's oldest son) is accepted into hospice.
Debbie's investigation into her lineage reveals family secrets and ignited her mother's outbursts, sending her into therapy. When therapy fails, the grandfather Debbie never knew ends up saving her. She collaborates with her dying father one last time to make her dreams come true.
I like how this book layed out the facts about the relationships and did so without shame or blaming the people in them. The multi-generational aspect made this story so much more rich.
I received a copy of this book in exchange for my honest opinion and review.
#crossingfiftyone #netgalley
June 21, 2023
An enlightening and engaging read.
This is a multi-generational memoir that shines a light upon the reality of midlife reorientation, therapy, families and addictions. When the author has to accept her own father’s mortality and impending death, she begins a journey of self-discovery. Criss-crossing between her own story and that of her grandfather's, and with the backdrop of her difficult relationship with her own mother, this is a searingly honest and thought-provoking account that unveils the author's deepest thoughts, fears and beliefs about herself and her family dynamics. I particularly liked the series of letters written by her grandfather that the author weaves through the book, and the way they link to her own story. Recommended!
This is a multi-generational memoir that shines a light upon the reality of midlife reorientation, therapy, families and addictions. When the author has to accept her own father’s mortality and impending death, she begins a journey of self-discovery. Criss-crossing between her own story and that of her grandfather's, and with the backdrop of her difficult relationship with her own mother, this is a searingly honest and thought-provoking account that unveils the author's deepest thoughts, fears and beliefs about herself and her family dynamics. I particularly liked the series of letters written by her grandfather that the author weaves through the book, and the way they link to her own story. Recommended!
April 14, 2023
Crossing Fifty-One, Not Quite a Memoir, is the kind of life story that grabs you by the nape of the neck from the first page and refuses to let you go. You not only read about the author’s family, with the descriptions of disappointments, crises, reconciliations, and, in the end, hope – but you truly FEEL all of it. Russell does a wonderful job of combining her own narrative with actual letters exchanged between family members for decades, and the result is a truly compelling family story, much of which every one of us can relate to.
July 10, 2023
A stunning lineage of hurt, healing, and the ties that bind us...
It is an actual skill to draw a reader in and captivate them for the length of any book, and doing this in a multigenerational family saga is no easy task. Debbie Russell did this masterfully. Crossing Fifty-One is a story of finding ourselves in others that share our blood and bond. Looking to the past and seeing our loved ones' past and present as beautifully flawed and for the humans they are sometimes can be a gift, bringing us self-acceptance and a better understanding and forgiveness of others. I loved this book!
It is an actual skill to draw a reader in and captivate them for the length of any book, and doing this in a multigenerational family saga is no easy task. Debbie Russell did this masterfully. Crossing Fifty-One is a story of finding ourselves in others that share our blood and bond. Looking to the past and seeing our loved ones' past and present as beautifully flawed and for the humans they are sometimes can be a gift, bringing us self-acceptance and a better understanding and forgiveness of others. I loved this book!
May 8, 2025
This book is a moving and honest portrayal of a family’s journey through addiction, illness, and mental health struggles. Anyone who has witnessed a loved one’s decline will find it both beautiful and heartbreaking. The author’s use of personal letters brings an intimate, authentic touch, making the story come alive. What stands out most is the courage shown in seeking help despite the stigma of the times-a reminder of how powerful and necessary that bravery can be. The complex family relationships add depth and poignancy, making this a truly worthwhile and memorable read.
June 8, 2025
Debbie Russell's "Crossing Fifty-one: Not Quite a Memoir" reads very much like a memoir, a very good one at that! With substantial research into her family's history and reflective insight into her own life, she tells the story of her paternal grandfather's voluntary stint in a federal drug-treatment facility to rehabilitate his use of narcotics to manage asthma symptoms. Russell relates the impact this has on his family and the generations that follow. With a style that is relatable, this story keeps readers engaged throughout.
July 17, 2025
This book was so much more than I was expecting.
Different timelines, different perspectives, although not in the typical way. Secrets and so much more that will really captivate the reader.
This is the kind of book that people will return to and find new things each time. It is a gift to those who suffer loss or have dealt with family drama and not the cookie-cutter upbringing.
Written with great love, it reassures the living that they can maintain a relationship with those who have died through loving them, talking about them, feeling their presence in their lives.
Different timelines, different perspectives, although not in the typical way. Secrets and so much more that will really captivate the reader.
This is the kind of book that people will return to and find new things each time. It is a gift to those who suffer loss or have dealt with family drama and not the cookie-cutter upbringing.
Written with great love, it reassures the living that they can maintain a relationship with those who have died through loving them, talking about them, feeling their presence in their lives.
July 21, 2025
This book was different that you would expect, but in a great way. Multi generational in finding secrets and more than she was expecting along the way.
We are taken along as Debbie finds herself in her learning about her herritage.
Debbie Russell brings us into her world and makes it our world--a world mixing love and loss, mortality and the amazement that we exist at all. She does this with wide open eyes to reality, in its splendor and sometimes grief, conscious but not depressed indeed inspired by its finitude.
We are taken along as Debbie finds herself in her learning about her herritage.
Debbie Russell brings us into her world and makes it our world--a world mixing love and loss, mortality and the amazement that we exist at all. She does this with wide open eyes to reality, in its splendor and sometimes grief, conscious but not depressed indeed inspired by its finitude.
June 14, 2023
Crossing 51 pulled me in from the first page. It’s an incredibly relatable story. Even though I personally did not have these same experiences in my own life, I could relate to the events, aging & ailing parents, and general dysfunctional family dynamics. Debbie brought to life each of the characters, which made you feel, you personally knew each person and were right there walking her shoes. It’s one of those books you just can’t put it down and leaves you wanting more.
February 28, 2025
Oh the struggles of our middle age, being a daughter and caregiver.
All the while weaving in 2 other family members stories.
So very good. Had me reliving my last few years with my father and also his passing. Our mother's could be sisters...
It was my pleasure to read this story, it was a bit hard to follow toward the mid to end, if she was speaking about her dad or grandfather, but I finally figured it out.
Loved the rants.
All the while weaving in 2 other family members stories.
So very good. Had me reliving my last few years with my father and also his passing. Our mother's could be sisters...
It was my pleasure to read this story, it was a bit hard to follow toward the mid to end, if she was speaking about her dad or grandfather, but I finally figured it out.
Loved the rants.
July 26, 2024
Debbie does a great job of intertwining her personal story with her family history. The reader gets a ride along as she discovers what her father and grandfather went through decades ago. We also learn that not all therapists are created equally. Keep an eye out for her next book which rumor has it will be about one or more of her bigger exploits as a county prosecutor.
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