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Life in Chaos
Dear Author,
Shit. You always think there’s plenty of time, plenty of chances. Staring down at 20% survival odds has made me rethink a lot of things. I wish I had come out of the closet instead of letting him leave, wish I’d been more willing to rock the boat before it started to sink. Maybe he meant it when he said he’d still be there for me, still be my friend.
This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Love is Always Write" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.
Download the story, read it online or find it in Love Is Always Write: Volume 5.
Shit. You always think there’s plenty of time, plenty of chances. Staring down at 20% survival odds has made me rethink a lot of things. I wish I had come out of the closet instead of letting him leave, wish I’d been more willing to rock the boat before it started to sink. Maybe he meant it when he said he’d still be there for me, still be my friend.
This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Love is Always Write" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.
Download the story, read it online or find it in Love Is Always Write: Volume 5.
35 pages, ebook
First published June 8, 2012
646 people are currently reading
365 people want to read
About the author
Kathleen Hayes
21 books105 followersKathleen Hayes is a bit of an all around geek. She has mastered the art of procrastination, is owned by two crazy cats and is excited to have just added a fellow super geek to her clan. Kathleen loves to explore worlds – whether in her head or on page. She welcomes you into her worlds and hopes you have as much fun there as she does!
She writes M/M Romance.
She writes M/M Romance.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews
October 6, 2013
This was a sweet and emotional little story. I fully admit to choking up in places.
This could work very well as a longer read, with more detail on how and when they got together, not to mention I wanted much more on Shawn's family life. But as a short read it was engaging.
OK now for one rather big niggle for me. I will spoiler although it doesn't give anything away.
OK sorry but that bothered me lol.
Despite that I enjoyed reading this little short. More a 3.5 but the spoiler really took away my involvement at the time.
June 22, 2012
There are sooo many things in this story that in the hands of other m/m authors would become angst fest. Not Ms. Hayes. She allows her characters to experience pain and sadness, but at the same time doesn't indulge herself with them. Instead, she uses those experiences as spring board to give the characters their HEA.
Some other things I like from the story:
- the inclusion of the female minister who prays with them. This is important since too often (some) m/m authors are guilty of the very same sin they accuse religious people of: generalization of a social group. They are against gay people to be portrayed in negative ways but at the same time they never failed to portray religious people in that way. This is ignorant about the fact that many gays are content with their religious faith.
- the struggle that the mother is facing. Yes, the mom choose to be with the father, but it doesn't mean she doesn't love Shawn.
I enjoyed reading this book.
Some other things I like from the story:
- the inclusion of the female minister who prays with them. This is important since too often (some) m/m authors are guilty of the very same sin they accuse religious people of: generalization of a social group. They are against gay people to be portrayed in negative ways but at the same time they never failed to portray religious people in that way. This is ignorant about the fact that many gays are content with their religious faith.
- the struggle that the mother is facing. Yes, the mom choose to be with the father, but it doesn't mean she doesn't love Shawn.
I enjoyed reading this book.
December 5, 2015
Outside in a stormy night, Shawn is suffering from the consequences of his recent medial treatment and is trying to accept the possiblity of death. Overcome by pain and tired of being aline in this difficult time, he is calling Andrew - his ex-boyfriend he is still deeply in love with. With death pending, he realizes what's really important in life and he wants to make things right before the end. Luckily, Andrew is willing to help Shawn. Will there be enough time left?
Life in Chaos is a very sweet and emotional short story, which is dealing with a serious and painful topic. And the author handels it really well. I think that this short would have worked perfectly as a longer story; I would have loved to read more about Shawn and Andrew coming together, breaking up, Shawn's family life and what happenes after.
3 stars!
Life in Chaos is a very sweet and emotional short story, which is dealing with a serious and painful topic. And the author handels it really well. I think that this short would have worked perfectly as a longer story; I would have loved to read more about Shawn and Andrew coming together, breaking up, Shawn's family life and what happenes after.
3 stars!
June 10, 2013
Reread 10/06/13
Life in Chaos is a beautiful, sweet story and more importantly, one full of hope and the beauty and power of love. A lovely, poignant read which can be revisited time and time again just to put a gentle smile on your face.
Original:
I enjoyed this book a lot, and liked that it didn't turn into a major angst-fest. I liked how they didn't make the mother into a total bad guy, but also didn't do they whole make-up and HEA shit. It was realistic and I thought it brought out the struggle his mother faced.
Life in Chaos is a beautiful, sweet story and more importantly, one full of hope and the beauty and power of love. A lovely, poignant read which can be revisited time and time again just to put a gentle smile on your face.
Original:
I enjoyed this book a lot, and liked that it didn't turn into a major angst-fest. I liked how they didn't make the mother into a total bad guy, but also didn't do they whole make-up and HEA shit. It was realistic and I thought it brought out the struggle his mother faced.
June 26, 2015
It's a good for a free read but I did feel it could have been fleshed out a bit more in places as though with just a little bit more time spent on it the story would be the full five stars.
I did wonder if he hadn't fallen ill would he have ever told his parents or would they have got back together, it was touch more -need someone- than -want you-, at first.
The female clergy was a refreshing change from the christians are haters message too many m/m stories cling to.
The author's sci-fi geekery is made ubundantly clear with the inclusion of favourites.
It's an emotional story and I found it very triggery hence me choosing not to keep it, but I would definitely read more by this author.
I did wonder if he hadn't fallen ill would he have ever told his parents or would they have got back together, it was touch more -need someone- than -want you-, at first.
The female clergy was a refreshing change from the christians are haters message too many m/m stories cling to.
The author's sci-fi geekery is made ubundantly clear with the inclusion of favourites.
It's an emotional story and I found it very triggery hence me choosing not to keep it, but I would definitely read more by this author.
April 11, 2013
Offered for FREE from the M/M Romance Group, Love Is Always Write: Volume Five.
This is a sometimes sad-sometimes sweet-but with a perfect HEA ending, little story. Definitely keep a box of tissues nearby. The addition of the accepting female chaplain was nice and a realistic group that often gets overlooked. (When I lived in Houston there was a huge Methodist community that are very accepting - the ones I knew anyway). I liked the way the mother was portrayed as well. . The medical stuff was my only issue. From little things like calling the CAT scan results "x-ray" films, to his post-surgical impairments and quick recovery. But definitely beautifully written.
August 27, 2012
This was a deeply moving story. I could feel the pain, fear and the agony that Shawn and Andrew went through as they dealt with cancer. The author has an excellent way of portraying a range of emotions from utter despair, to joy and excitement and love. She manages to do this within this short book in a way that is gripping and it certainly held my attention.
It was not just the main characters whose emotion I could feel, I could also feel the coldness and the resignation of Shawn's mother as she turned her back on her son, and also the professionalism of the doctor as he explained the next steps to treatment for Shawn. I also appreciated the way the author brought in the issue of religious faith, not in the stereotypical way of the homophobic religious leader, but through an ordinary hospital chaplain who is quietly there for all patients. As someone who has received this kind of care that particular part in the book touched me. This was a free read as well and I appreciate the thought, care and research that has so obviously gone into this book. I will definitely be checking out other work from this author.
It was not just the main characters whose emotion I could feel, I could also feel the coldness and the resignation of Shawn's mother as she turned her back on her son, and also the professionalism of the doctor as he explained the next steps to treatment for Shawn. I also appreciated the way the author brought in the issue of religious faith, not in the stereotypical way of the homophobic religious leader, but through an ordinary hospital chaplain who is quietly there for all patients. As someone who has received this kind of care that particular part in the book touched me. This was a free read as well and I appreciate the thought, care and research that has so obviously gone into this book. I will definitely be checking out other work from this author.
January 17, 2014
This was a really good short. It wasn't as angsty as I was expecting - but in a good way. The characters seemed very real and I enjoyed watching them overcome the obstacle that could have destroyed them, and then the ending was perfect!
I liked a few of the smaller details too. Like the female minister. The second chance story was even perfect for me. I love it when a couple reunites (once it involves no cheating, of course).
Cancer is such a hard topic. Some authors don't do a good job. But this author did. She got the emotions so right and I could feel the story. It wasn't just bland reading.
I liked a few of the smaller details too. Like the female minister. The second chance story was even perfect for me. I love it when a couple reunites (once it involves no cheating, of course).
Cancer is such a hard topic. Some authors don't do a good job. But this author did. She got the emotions so right and I could feel the story. It wasn't just bland reading.
December 6, 2012
3.5 stars
I loved the opening scene in this short with Shawn standing in a downpour, under a lightning filled sky. He is overcome with anguish and forced to confront his looming mortality. He's got a heavy burden and needs to find his way back to his lover, Andrew, who he loves deeply. Sometimes it takes something momentous staring us down to make us realize the truly important things in our lives. This well written story covered a lot of ground effectively and remained true to the prompt.
I loved the opening scene in this short with Shawn standing in a downpour, under a lightning filled sky. He is overcome with anguish and forced to confront his looming mortality. He's got a heavy burden and needs to find his way back to his lover, Andrew, who he loves deeply. Sometimes it takes something momentous staring us down to make us realize the truly important things in our lives. This well written story covered a lot of ground effectively and remained true to the prompt.
September 10, 2012
Beautiful and touching and so very sweet. Andrew is amazing, first so brave to stand up for himself and end the unhealthy relationship, and then so forgiving and kind and patient... and brave again... when Shawn calls him for help. I loved the mini-epilogue at the end, too.
I was also very impressed at the portrayal of the women in this story. Both the mother and the chaplain came across as real people instead of the stereotypes we so often get in M/M.
3.5 stars rounded up for being free
I was also very impressed at the portrayal of the women in this story. Both the mother and the chaplain came across as real people instead of the stereotypes we so often get in M/M.
3.5 stars rounded up for being free
June 23, 2012
Wonderful story. Very gripping start, hard subjects to deal with--parents who don't know you are gay and a brain tumer? Shawn needed help and thank God Andrew was there for him. And Shawn was so wonderful in how he cared for Shawn. As a gay Christian, I was glad of the accepting nature of the hospital chaplain--especially in Texas. Very cool ending!
June 8, 2012
This was a hard one for me for very personal reasons , but a great read none the less.
Andrew is a great guy and brave Shawn, I wished it had been longer, but despite the sadness I felt while reading it, I had a smile on my face at the end.
Thanks Kathleen for a sweet, sentimental story!
Andrew is a great guy and brave Shawn, I wished it had been longer, but despite the sadness I felt while reading it, I had a smile on my face at the end.
Thanks Kathleen for a sweet, sentimental story!
June 8, 2012
Have your kleenex ready:)
November 14, 2012
The story is definitely well written. I, once again, am an old "softie" and things like this have different kinds of effects on me. This story, however, hits a little too close to home. My partner died of cancer, so it was a very hard thing to read. I was glad of the happy ending, but with the type of cancer that Shawn had, it's hard for me to picture that reality. Yes, I know, it's a story, and I should review and rate based on those things alone; but we all bring our perceptions and experiences with us wherever we go; this is no different. Again, it is well written, and the ending is a great one. If you are looking for an uplifting story, this one is for you.
November 22, 2013
Wow...This one was tough for me to read having lost my Dad to Cancer this year. Reliving this experience was hard to read. However it was a beautiful story with a sweet and fitting ending...would love to see what the future was like for these two.
February 26, 2014
Emtional but liked it alot.
April 18, 2015
4.5 - I loved this story. It was sweet, touching, beautiful, and a little sad. Great story. Thank you Kathleen Hayes, for donating your story, time and talent.
July 4, 2012
Lovely. Sad, hopeful, inspiring, and lovely.
August 28, 2012
This book sucked. It had such a "first time writer" feel to it and such blasphemy to have misspelled words in there! Waste of time
November 23, 2012
A really gorgeous short story. It was very moving and well told.
August 31, 2018
Terrifying, heartrending, hopeful... This story brings out so many emotions and pulls you right in. For such a short story, it really packs a punch. First the cancer and then on top of that, Shawn’s shit-for-parents. I still cannot fathom how parents can turn their backs on their child! Andrew was far too gracious when “Mother” showed up. Through the toughest of times, Andrew was there for Shawn and they so deserved their HEA.
There were a few minor editing issues but overall this was well written. This would work so well if the author would expand it into a novella.
There were a few minor editing issues but overall this was well written. This would work so well if the author would expand it into a novella.
November 27, 2018
Excellent story. Andrew and Sean truly love one another, but Sean won't come out to his family. Andrew finally draws a line. I really liked the way the author brought these two back together. There are no tentative indecisions. Sean reaches out and Andrew is immediately committed to being his support. I loved the ending.
All read
Part of the Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 5
All read
Part of the Love is Always Write Anthology Volume 5
February 9, 2021
Andrew is such a good guy. Things work out well for Shawn.
August 25, 2021
3.5 Stars
bitter sweet story.
Personally I would want bit more background and character development for this trope, basically just a longer version of this.
bitter sweet story.
Personally I would want bit more background and character development for this trope, basically just a longer version of this.
March 21, 2014
Oh this is one of the best short stories I have read in a long time! (Ever?) So touching, from the beginning with Shawn and Andrew's reunion, then explaining his 20% survival odds (and keeping you in suspense), and taking brief forays into the past to explain Shawn's relationship with Andrew and with Shawn's parents. Then going through the conflict, worrying and waiting and just making this story so emotional. I would have loved even more if this was a full length novel with more of their relationship beforehand, and maybe afterwards too. But this was so well written, that I was actually not disappointed by its short length, instead it felt right by the ending.
I loved both the MCs--Andrew, how mature and caring he was, especially with how he steps up and supports after the bombshell Shawn drops; and Shawn, how he gathers his courage and does what he needs to to get where he wants to be. This story was short and sweet, a tear-jerker (I actually had a few tears run down my face), and such a beautiful little read about second chances (in several different ways) and the true meaning of love "in sickness and in health." Plus, I adored the ending...so perfect for this story, it wrapped up and connected everything. It showed yet again that S and A were both such wonderful men! Loved, loved, loved this all around!
I loved both the MCs--Andrew, how mature and caring he was, especially with how he steps up and supports after the bombshell Shawn drops; and Shawn, how he gathers his courage and does what he needs to to get where he wants to be. This story was short and sweet, a tear-jerker (I actually had a few tears run down my face), and such a beautiful little read about second chances (in several different ways) and the true meaning of love "in sickness and in health." Plus, I adored the ending...so perfect for this story, it wrapped up and connected everything. It showed yet again that S and A were both such wonderful men! Loved, loved, loved this all around!
June 24, 2013
Truly only 4 stars because I craved more. It's beautifully written and was difficult to put down at times, but sleep called.
Mini review because I don't want to give too much away.
Future readers: I hope you like roller coasters because this story will send your emotions all over the place. You'll be smiling and laughing one minute, and crying your eyes out the next.
The relationship between Shawn and Andrew was an inspiring one. It goes to show that if things are meant to be, they'll find a way. It's very clear how they feel about one another and how much they truly love each other. I feel like this story is rather realistic when it comes to opening up about your sexuality. Some might accept it, others might not. In the end, however, all that matters is that you're truly happy and will fight to be with the one that you love.
Mini review because I don't want to give too much away.
Future readers: I hope you like roller coasters because this story will send your emotions all over the place. You'll be smiling and laughing one minute, and crying your eyes out the next.
The relationship between Shawn and Andrew was an inspiring one. It goes to show that if things are meant to be, they'll find a way. It's very clear how they feel about one another and how much they truly love each other. I feel like this story is rather realistic when it comes to opening up about your sexuality. Some might accept it, others might not. In the end, however, all that matters is that you're truly happy and will fight to be with the one that you love.
January 15, 2016
Wow how heartbreaking.....
I wouldn't have minded this being a full lengther... .first we have one MC that can't come out because his family is horrible, and seriously... they so are. So the other MC gets tired of being a closeted couple and decides he can't do it anymore... and honestly, who could blame him..... however, after they break up, the one with the horrible family finds out he has a brain tumor and had no one to be there for him thru his sickness because, did I mention that his family is awful?
During a bad time after a treatment, he calls Andrew, the other MC, he was scared, dying and didn't want to be alone anymore, but..... he shoulda known he wouldn't be left alone because they still loved each other. They deal with it together, the hurt and being afraid and 9 hour surgery... luckily these two get a HEA, but it wasn't easy....
The epilogue is super cute!
I wouldn't have minded this being a full lengther... .first we have one MC that can't come out because his family is horrible, and seriously... they so are. So the other MC gets tired of being a closeted couple and decides he can't do it anymore... and honestly, who could blame him..... however, after they break up, the one with the horrible family finds out he has a brain tumor and had no one to be there for him thru his sickness because, did I mention that his family is awful?
During a bad time after a treatment, he calls Andrew, the other MC, he was scared, dying and didn't want to be alone anymore, but..... he shoulda known he wouldn't be left alone because they still loved each other. They deal with it together, the hurt and being afraid and 9 hour surgery... luckily these two get a HEA, but it wasn't easy....
The epilogue is super cute!
March 23, 2017
This was my second ebook and I really loved it! A very well written short story which highlighted the difficulty faced by many in a same sex relationship, one that nobody should have to fear but often do. To be faced not only with a break up but a brain tumour to deal with as well must be incomprehensible. This story really put life into perspective for me, in the sense that no matter how hard a task may be, it's important that its dealt with, regardless of the outcome. A really great short read!
July 19, 2015
Shawn has thrown away the best thing because of his fear of coming out to his family but in the end he looses them too. But when he feels that he has no where to turn one call to Andrew brings them back together. I admire Andrew so much for being able to forgive and understand all that Shawn has faced and to be there for and to give his love freely. It was heartbreaking to see the choice the his mother makes.
April 3, 2016
An ok read. Can't really say I've built an attachment to either of the MCs. While I empathise with his predicament I just don't feel any attachment to him.
Andrew's outburst when he was approached about power of attorney seemed out of character.
The prayer that was said didn't seem natural.
Odd momentary change of perspective to his mother's.
Questions left unanswered. Story rushed. At the most pivotal moments the scene basically faded to black.
Sorry, not my cuppa tea.
Andrew's outburst when he was approached about power of attorney seemed out of character.
The prayer that was said didn't seem natural.
Odd momentary change of perspective to his mother's.
Questions left unanswered. Story rushed. At the most pivotal moments the scene basically faded to black.
Sorry, not my cuppa tea.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews