Single: Arguments for the Uncoupled

Sexual Cultures

by Michael Cobb, Keith Faulks

A radical defense of a solitary life

What single person hasn't suffered? Everyone, it seems, must be (or must want to be) in a couple. To exist outside of the couple is to assume an antisocial position that is ruthlessly discouraged because being in a couple is the way most people bind themselves to the social. Singles might just be the single most reviled sexual minorities today.

Arguments for the Uncoupled offers a polemic account of this supremacy of the
couple form, and how that supremacy blocks our understanding of the single. Michael Cobb reads the figurative language surrounding singleness as it traverses an eclectic set of literary, cultural, philosophical, psychoanalytical, and popular culture objects from Plato, Freud, Ralph Ellison, Herman Melville, Virginia Woolf, Barack Obama, Emily Dickinson, Morrissey, Georgia O'Keeffe, and Hannah Arendt to the Bible, Sex and the City , Bridget Jones' Diary , Beyoncé's “Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It),” and HBO's Big Love . Within these flights of fancy, poetry, fiction, strange moments in film and video, paintings made in the desert, bits of song, and memoirs of hiking in national parks, Cobb offers an inspired, eloquent
rumination on the single, which is guaranteed to spark conversation and consideration.

Genres: Nonfiction, Philosophy, Queer, Cultural

239 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2012

Reviews

[Lydia]

After finishing it, I was left with the feeling of finding it overly self-indulgent, and not that useful to my personal ace studies, which I why I haven't added it to the shelf.
HOWEVER, I blew my own mind wide open last night thinking about the "great movie romances" (PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE has just gone wide this month, for context) are all about failures of the couple and what it means for two people to strive for "eternity," which Cobb discusses in his book. I remembered Timothy Synder's discussion of "politics of eternity," not about couples but the state (which is an apparatus that is VERY invested in couples), and I think I'm onto something (rather, they're onto something and I'm slowly catching up). But it's so slippery.

[Peter North · Rating 3 out of 5]

Great topic but a bleak demonstration. It's very much a thesis and a bundle of research. Cobb's references are clever, although he has a hard time connecting with his reader and making many points. As other reviewers said, the momentum of the intro was great. Cobb should have continued this pace through the whole piece but the rest reads quite diluted.

[Juliann · Rating 3 out of 5]

Really enjoyed the intro and the references to Arendt, Benjamin, Carson, Aristophanes etc. There are some clever puns throughout (e.g. Melville’s Bartleby: “I’d prefer not two” instead of “I’d prefer not to”) and interesting connections between contemporary pop culture and modern art/theory. Also pretty accessible for an academic text. I was slightly annoyed by the repetition of the thesis: that you *don’t* need a significant other to make sense of the world; that our society encourages a view of “singleness” as a “conundrum” which can only be solved through the couple form. This idea came across loud and clear in the intro, and was afterwards used as a conduit (?) for the close reading of various texts (e.g. ‘Invisible Man’ by Ralph Ellison, ‘Autobiography of Red’ by Carson), which I found repetitive and at times predictable. Still interesting and insightful though, and definitely something I would consider re-reading.

[Regina Barona · Rating 3 out of 5]

A rather heady read that involves much involvement in the knowledge of contemporary media as well as modern literature. Cobb's words seems to be arguments against the coupled, much more than it is arguments for the uncoupled. I had the privilege of hearing Cobb speaking at a queer literature lecture at the University of Toronto, so I know that the manner in which he writes is unparalleled to the manner in which he lectures; he is animated, introspective, relatable, funny and lacking the literary jargon I didn't enjoy within his book. Regardless, I liked the unique perspective he brings to academia; a fresh outlook on a world that privileges a resolute and strong island of singleness. An author who critiques the flow that the rivers of society leave unquestioned, is always a welcome to my curiosity, and for that I applaud Cobb's work.

[Michelle]

Sadly, my brain is too rotted to read this, I couldn't even get through the whole introduction, nor subsequently the first chapter. This is an academic, philosophical, intellectual book that constantly references literature, film etc., which wasn't what I really expected or wanted. But more to the point, I'm just no longer smart enough to read this.

[Stephen Durell · Rating 3 out of 5]

The intro was great. The rest of the book was more academic than I was looking for.

[Morgan · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was more like arguments against the coupled, but it suited me just fine for a pre-Valentines read. He makes some very good points, though I feel some he belaboured a bit.