The Dance of Defiance: A Mother and Son Journey With Oppositional Defiant Disorder

by Nancy A. Hagener

This book takes readers on a journey as one mother searches for answers to her child's defiant behavior. Filled with heartwarming stories, honest insights and enlightening discoveries, The Dance of Defiance is a story of hope. Written by a parent for parents, this book will be a valuable tool for parents, educators, and individuals working with a child who has oppositional defiant disorder. In addition to strategies for parents and teachers and a section on sibling relationships, The Dance of Defiance contains an extensive Parent and Family Resource section that provides valuable help those on a similar journey.

Genres: Psychology

Paperback

First published May 30, 2005

Reviews

[Jamie Saloff · Rating 5 out of 5]

After years of frustration, embarrassment, and self-imposed exile, Nancy and her family find a reason and a cure for their son's unmanageable rage, and mis-behavior. This book details the journey and resources for finding relief. Nancy is quickly becoming a highly sought speaker as countless parents seek relief from what childrens behavioral problems and are learning it is not their fault. There is a reason and a cure.

[AudReads · Rating 3 out of 5]

If you are interested in following a family’s journey through living with a child with oppositional defiant disorder, the personal side of the author’s journey is interesting. She writes about her loneliness and isolation, and also about the difficulties in finding treatment that actually works long-term. She also explains the agony and sadness her son has gone through with his anger and aggression. What frustrated me about the book is that although she details some very personal details about her son in an effort to help others, she really doesn’t explain what really worked for him. He ended up on medication and with counseling, and even though I know that no one medication works for everyone, it would have been nice to hear which ones they tried, how her son handled them, etc... Also, once she found a doctor who could help her son through therapy, she really didn’t explain what the doctor said or did to help her son.

[Megan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thankful to Nancy for writing her story. Here are some parts of the book that stuck with me:

“One of the most common characteristics of ODD is the practice of annoying people while enjoying their reactions.”

“Rather than using positive reinforcement, parents and teachers need to use indirect reinforcement…Suggestions for indirect reinforcement include minimizing public praise. Instead, the teacher could tap the student on the shoulder, whisper praise, leave notes, or provide rewards discreetly.”

“Oppositional behavior is fueled by competition. Sibling rivalry is competitive to begin with. Adding oppositional defiance to sibling rivalry is a recipe for conflict.”

[Ashley Pagan]

Awesome insight into a parent's journey through school and home experiences of trying to discover a diagnosis and help with their child's needs!

[Daron Ruckman · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not a light hearted book, but helps to explain the struggles of families that have members with behavioral problems.