I don't normally pick up love stories, but I just couldn't help myself with this one when I saw it at a book sale. I found it simple and complex at the same time. My heart goes out to the main character, Selina. There is just something about a person that has to endure a filthy lifestyle and is forced to play a part they never wanted or asked for that just gets to me. She was not made for this ("this" being a drunken household, a whore for a mother, being used and unappreciated, and being verbally and physically abused to the point of being raped by one of her mother's customers....people were never intended to be made for treatment that diminishes their inner worth.). Then she goes to the park one day and meets someone that truly sees past her scars and blindness to the value underneath the neglect. Unknowingly, she's observed by a man who sees her in a moment of vulnerability and falls in love with her humanity despite all her flaws and the complications of even hoping to establish a relationship. Yet, Gordon brings out the best in her and helps her to see what she's worth despite the consequences.
One thing I really liked was that many of her thoughts are what women think or would think in her situation. She's very innocently blunt in her speech. Very sincere. Little things like:
"I had been too happy. That's dangerous. One should never be too happy."
"And now, since I know you, I know that "friend" is the grandest, biggest and best word..."
More complicated things like:
"I never meant to say those words. The words said themselves." (in reference to saying I love you)
"I was ashamed as I had never known to be ashamed. I was--nothing. I had nothing, could do nothing--thread beads on strings, that was all. I was blind, unsightly...What had got into me? I had told a man 'I love you' and, like a dish of cold unwanted food, my love was tossed back at me. Shame!"
And sad things like when she starts to realize what had all been done to her and the true cost:
"Why couldn't it have been a man I loved--who loved me? Why had my decency, my pride as a girl, a woman, been torn so savagely by an unknown marauder? Why, why and oh why? After the day I'd just spent, why did I have to think only of these dreadful things? Was I born with a wicked heart? Was I always being punished for my born wickedness? Would it turn out that meeting--knowing, yes and loving Gordon would follow on, turn out not to be fine, clean and wonderful? Sitting under the tree, thinking over my life, I couldn't figure out how anything good, lasting good, could be for me."
The ending is what you would expect. Events, people, the world, fear, and a bunch of other stuff pull them apart. But the way it ends is not really an ending to me. It's one of those books where you can write the ending for yourself because it leaves room for the imagination to linger. Knowing how much they love each other and want each other, I think it's very probable that the hero and heroine get a second chance. There is nothing that cannot be found if sought. I think the main characters are brave enough to seek it and strong enough to maintain it.