(The Plausibility Problem: The Church And Same-Sex Attraction) [By: Ed Shaw] [Feb, 2015]

by Ed Shaw

It's all very well to say that the Bible is clear when it talks about homosexuality. But is it realistic? Isn't it unrealistic and unfair to those who struggle with this issue? Doesn't it condemn them to loneliness, a lack of fulfilment and the loss of basic human satisfactions like sex and marriage? Is what the church teaches a plausible way of life?
Ed Shaw experiences same-sex attraction, and yet he is committed to what the Bible says and what the church has always taught about marriage and sex. In this honest book, he shares his pain in dealing with these issues - but, at the same time, shows us that obedience to Jesus is ultimately the only way to experience life to the full.

He shows that the Bible's teaching seems unreasonable not because of its difficulties, but because of missteps that the church has often taken in its understanding of the Christian life. We have been shaped by the world around us, and urgently need to re-examine the values that drive our discipleship. Only by doing this in the light of the Bible, can we make sense of its call on the lives of those who are attracted to their own sex.

We have so often made Jesus' way sound like a bad deal. Only by reclaiming the reality of gospel discipleship, can we truly see and appreciate that life in Christ is the best way for any human life to be lived - whomever we are attracted to

Genres: Christian, Theology, Nonfiction, Sexuality, Christianity, Faith, Christian Living

Paperback

First published February 20, 2015

Reviews

[Jonah Bateson · Rating 2 out of 5]

Plausibility Problem

The Plausibility Problem shows how it is plausible to live life as a gay celibate christian, and in doing so assumes its position as reasonable and exclusively right.

Each chapter focuses on a different 'misstep', or flaw of the church's thinking. Each misstep that the author identifies could be a sermon in its own right, but it is misleading to apply them all to gay celibacy.

Misstep no. 1. 'Your identity is your sexuality'

Here Shaw discusses why he chooses to refer to himself as 'experiencing same-sex attraction' rather than gay. Essentially this is because, I quote 'They will equate me saying, 'I'm gay!' with me embracing a gay lifestyle and identity, which I'm not.' What exactly is this 'gay lifestyle and identity' that Shaw is referring to here? 'It also helps to limit the invitations to bad musicals (to name and shame just one of the stereotypes)'. I know Shaw wrote this in jest, but seriously?

He goes on to say: 'But it's not Phantom of the Opera that I'm trying to avoid most. What I most want to avoid is any other identity that might attempt to displace my fundamental identity as a Christian.' Why is being gay (rather than 'experiencing same-sex attraction') and being Christian mutually exclusive? Yes, it is true that your identity is not defined by your sexuality, but your sexuality is probably part of your biology, and at the very least a part of your in-built psychological wiring. The definition of the word 'gay' means exactly the same thing as the term he has substituted it for. Being 'gay' is not a lifestyle; it is a sexual orientation. Therefore, it is perfectly reasonable to identify as a gay, celibate and Christian. If Shaw is concerned about stereotypical connotations of the word 'gay', he should adopt the label and be an example of someone who defies those connotations. But by adopting the term 'same-sex attraction' Shaw does not help to change stereotypes - he reinforces them. I wonder if Shaw would encourage people with yellowish hair to identify themselves as those 'experiencing light-haired tendencies' in case identifying oneself with the label 'blonde' would interfere too much with the identity of being a Christian.

Misstep no.2. 'A family is mum, dad and 2.4 children.'

There's not much to say here. Shaw explains how it is possible to have intimate relationships without being married or romantically involved. Shaw does well to explain how singleness is generally undervalued in the church and how family is not just biological, but some of the deepest relationships are between friends who share their lives together. But does this mean that because it is possible to live as a celibate gay Christian, you should? I feel like Shaw is philosophically begging the question.

Misstep no. 3. 'If you're born gay, it can't be wrong to be gay.'

Here, Shaw makes the theological point that something's naturalness does not necessitate its rightfulness. But the reverse is also true.

Misstep no. 4. 'If it makes you happy, it must be right!'

Things that make you happy are not automatically morally right. Yet again, though, things that make you happy are not automatically wrong. Shaw's argument drifts in to asceticism, here.

Misstep no. 5. 'Sex is where true intimacy is found.'

See my comments on Misstep no. 2.

Misstep no. 6. 'Men and women are equal and interchangeable.'

I am wary of Shaw's basis for his point, which is essentially that gender is binary. He quotes Men Are from Mars, Women are from Venus, and says 'But we don't have to trust a controversial pop psychologist on this' and immediately after refers to Pride and Prejudice, Much Ado About Nothing, and the TV show Friends. Not exactly scientific sources, I'm sure you would agree.

Misstep no. 7. 'Godliness is heterosexuality.'

The author helpfully explains how homosexuality and godliness are compatible, but only, he says, in the form of celibacy. Nevertheless, it is good to see traditional views on homosexuality equalling sin dispelled.

Misstep no. 8. 'Celibacy is bad for you.'

Shaw again cheers on singleness, and gives excellent insight into the way single people are often treated within the church: 'You're taught how to survive until your wedding day - not how to thrive as a single woman or man until your dying day.' Boom. This chapter is invaluable.

Misstep no. 9. 'Suffering is to be avoided.'

This chapter again, is fantastically challenging for me as a heterosexual Christian. What will I sacrifice in my pursuit of Jesus? 'We prefer the idea of a successful king to a suffering one...follow a successful king and you share in his success; follow a suffering king and you share in his sufferings.' But then, I don't think that something (i.e. gay marriage) should be sacrificed on the principle that to do so would cause suffering. Otherwise one would be sacrificing all friendships, any fun activity, clothes, food, and so on.

After these nine sections, the author includes appendices, which focus more on the theological side of things. He peels back the Bible's meta narrative and makes some very interesting points about the fabric of scripture. In terms of contributing to the 'Is Gay Marriage Right?' argument, these parts are the most relevant. Yet they come across resoundingly as arguments ex silentio.

Next, there is a chapter on the implausibility of modern interpretations of scripture. These seem more like generalised attacks on specific authors than on the theological points they make.

This book has a lot of valuable guidance for the church, but not, for the gay marriage debate. Shaw shows that being gay, celibate and Christian is plausible. But he fails to show how being a gay Christian, in a committed marriage, is implausible.

[Taylor Lindsay Winter]

If you come to this book decidedly against the Christian faith, or opposed to the view you think Shaw will share, you won't like this read. Not because it's lacking anything, but because he writes it under two premises he hopes you'll understand: life with Jesus is joyful, and his life (as a gay man, or rather "same sex attracted" which he explains) is also joyful, and full. This book will be an amazing and succinct read, no matter who you are, if you're willing to at least consider these as true.

No summaries ahead, just a few noteworthy points: Shaw does not try to say "you aren't born gay" or "God wants you to be born straight". He spends far less time on the quandary of what to "say to your gay friends" but focuses more on what it means to live as a Christian. He addresses how singleness is treated in the church and how pressure is put on marriage (in secular and religious circles alike) to be a be-all-end-all it wasn't meant to be.

He assesses how women have been treated, how different sins are frowned on more than others, and how emphasis on intimate friendships is lacking - all in the church. Yet at the same time he doesn't show contempt for the church, but hopes for what it could be. I read this as a straight unmarried Christian and walked away stirred to make changes, though I'm not sure I was the audience he had in mind.

Bottom line: the focus of this book is "what life with God really means" and not "what sin not to do". Read this book for the question he addresses, and you'll walk away with more than one answer.

[Joshua Reitano · Rating 5 out of 5]

I went bananas over Sam Alberry's book on this topic, but I have to say, Ed Shaw's The Plausibility Problem is even better. Writing as a same sex attracted Christian minister, Shaw makes a compelling case for the historic biblical understanding of marriage and sexuality. Like other volumes he treats the key biblical proof texts, and he shares powerful anecdotes and personal stories. But where this book excels is in its cultural and emotional IQ in understanding where the real issues lie in most people's objections to biblical sexuality. Shaw argues that it's not that people don't HEAR traditional Christians (and thus we need to shout louder), but that it's they don't UNDERSTAND them. In other words, there is not a plausibility structure in place that enables one to make sense of biblical teaching on sexuality and marriage. Rather than as part of a beautiful design, biblical ethics seem arbitrary, shallow and soul-crushing. Shaw argues that this is the area where we now need to labor. We need to build plausibility structures both in our worldview (a la pre-suppositional apologetics), but also in our communities as we demonstrate what it looks like to work out our salvation in community with other Christians. This is the kind of word and deed ministry we will need in order to communicate in a post-Christian world.

The first two chapters lay out the plausibility problem: culturally and in Shaw's own personal story. The next 9 chapters discuss a series of missteps: 1.) Your identity is your sexuality; 2.) A family is mum, dad, and 2.4 children; 3.) If you're born gay, it can't be wrong to be gay; 4.) If it makes you happy, it must be right; 5.) Sex is where true intimacy is found; 6.) Men and women are equal and interchangeable; 7.) Godliness is heterosexuality; 8.) Celibacy is bad for you; 9.) Suffering is to be avoided. He also adds a very helpful series of appendixes dealing with the exegesis of texts dealing with homosexuality, always carefully situating them in the larger biblical story.

Highly recommended. This will be my go to resource on this topic.

[Jonathan Downing · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fantastic read, prompting thoughts not only about how the church can better equip and serve same-sex attracted individuals, but also about singleness and the fact that we're not to idolise marriage and the middle-class and 2.4 children in the suburbs. Well worth a read both to re-evaluate the priorities we're living for and to challenge us to reform what we're encouraging in the church.

[David Sarkies · Rating 5 out of 5]

Coming To Terms in a Changing World
10 July 2022

The thing that I should point out with this book is that it is really geared towards Christians, and church leaders, as opposed to non-Christians. The reason that I open with this is because the premise of this book is that gay Christians should not act upon their homosexuality and that they will need to commit to a life of celibacy. This is certainly a hard statement to make, and even though the author says that he is same-sex attracted (he won’t use the term gay, or homosexual, because in his mind that means that he is actively living that lifestyle, or at least feels that others will assume this to be the case) it is still pretty hard to hear.

Mind you, this isn’t the only hard thing to hear when it comes to Christianity, the whole ‘we are all sinners and deserving of God’s wrath’ is pretty hard to hear as well. The thing is that people who tend to obey the laws, and don’t do anything particularly bad, will probably find this insulting, if not downright offensive, but the thing is that as Shaw explains in this book, when it comes to cisgender, heterosexual members of the church, there seems to be a serious plausibility problem.

I agree with him, especially since being a single, cis-gender, heterosexual male, I have some serious issues with the church. For instance, in Melbourne, in a city of something like 6 million people, there is only one church service that I feel comfortable attending. Okay, one of the reasons is that I don’t like getting up too early, but the reality is that most services are either focused on families, or on young people. While there are some services that I would feel comfortable attending, they tend to be way too early in the morning, and I like to sleep in on my weekends.

However, it is the whole families thing that tends to get me. I have spoken to a number of single people who say that going to a family service is hard because, well, people tend to spend more time running around after the children and also tend to make friends with other families. That was the case when I was a kid because I only ever remember going to people’s houses who happened to have a family (because as a kid, if they either didn’t have kids or were single, then we would be board out of our brains). Mind you, there does happen to be this attitude among Christians that the goal is to get married and start a family, and that tends to leave single people (as well as childless couples) out in the cold. I still remember walking into one church one evening, and there was this beautiful couple holding a beautiful baby standing in the middle of the building – it made me sick.

Don’t get me wrong, I have numerous friends who are married with children, and I don’t have an issue with them, but it was that image that has stuck in my mind that told me that this happens to be a serious problem with the church. In fact, you will have people that will go around telling you that God has a partner set aside for you and that God wants you to have children, so even if you happen to be barren, well, he will overcome that. Honestly, that is absolute rubbish and is actually quite unhelpful.

The other thing is that the church seems to elevate homosexuality above that many of the other sins. In fact, there tends to be this rating of sins in the church, when according to the Bible that is not the case. Check out that hot person sitting in the other row, well, that’s okay, we all do that. Talk about that person you don’t like, well, that’s okay, everybody does that. Look at porn, well, we need to do something about that, but that’s okay, that’s something we all struggle with. Look at gay porn – well this is a very, very serious issue that needs to be addressed.

I remember when I was on a church camp, a men’s only one, and we discussed this very thing. The pastor actually said that if anybody was looking at gay porn they need to come to speak with him immediately. Somebody did, and the reason that I know about it is because six months later one of them, which happened to be a small group leader, was named and shamed in from of the entire congregation – and all he did was change his Facebook status from heterosexual to bi-sexual.

There we go – gay conversion therapy at its finest.

In the introduction, Shaw gives us a couple of examples, one being a young man who has discovered that he is same-sex attracted, and an older woman who has had a number of bad relationships, has become a Christian, but has also entered a relationship with another woman. The thing that caught me was how the young man, at youth group, was being bombarded by the church with talk of how wonderful sex is, but only after marriage. In fact, there is mention of how this couple who are in leadership, give a talk about how amazing leaving sex until after marriage really is.

While I am not same-sex attracted, I can easily relate to the young man because, well, that was the teaching I got from my youth group. Honestly, there is one major flaw in that teaching and that is that they have absolutely no baseline for which to measure it. Honestly, how can somebody claim that waiting to have sex until after marriage is better than sex before marriage if they actually have not had sex before marriage. Okay, I do know people (me being one of them) who have regretted having sex before marriage, but the thing is that that teaching really does mess with your head – it is as if somebody who isn’t married is basically missing out, and when married couples rave about it from the pulpit, you start to feel like a lesser human being.

Okay, there is also talk about the gift of celibacy, which to be honest with you, is pathetic. To me, the gift of celibacy simply exists to make unmarried people feel good about themselves, all the while the married people are running around as if they are somewhat better because they have found their life partner. Actually, a number of these married people who I knew are now actually divorced. I do find it interesting how the church is more than happy to condemn homosexual and pre-marital sex, but will refuse to talk about the passage that talks about remarriage after divorce. Okay, one of the reasons that I have had an issue with Christian divorcees getting married again is due to jealousy, but another part of me feels as if they haven’t learnt anything. Mind you, as I mentioned, I do actually know a number of divorcees, and even though I get along with some of the women, a part of me will keep my distance because of this prohibition against remarriage (or at least in the case where I know the ex-husband).

Mind you, it isn’t just the prohibition on pre-marital sex, but also the prohibition on becoming involved with, and marrying, a non-Christian. That certainly does put some restraints on people like me who simply don’t seem to be able to connect with the Christian women at church. Actually, it is even worse when one of your ex-girlfriends goes around poisoning the minds of other women about you, and the reason I knew this happened was because I was told by one of her friends. In fact, this particular church would regularly interfere with relationships that they didn’t approve of, including one young lady who was dating a Catholic. Basically, they told her that she either split up with him, or they will remove her from leadership.

So yes, while this book challenged me in quite a few ways, especially with how I live my life and conduct myself, Shaw is right that the church really needs to look in on itself and start working to relate to the single people in the congregation. Mind you, the church I was speaking of is one church, and not all of them are like that, though sadly there are too many. The thing is, as I mentioned, the book is really focused not just on the church, but on us as individuals, and how we need to shift our focus to care for those who don’t fit the typical happy family mould.

If it sounds like I have got an axe to grind, that is because I have. Shaw certainly did, but he isn’t anywhere near as blunt as I have been. The problem is that even though Shaw still struggles with loneliness, and the desire to have a companion, the thing that he doesn’t realise is that he is a leader in the church, and they tend to be supported a lot more than the average congregant. In fact, many average congregants end up falling between the cracks. Times have changed, and unfortunately, the church doesn’t change with them, not that I am suggesting that they compromise their core principles, but rather that they need to realise that thoughts and prayers aren’t the way to solve all of the problems out there. Gay conversion therapy doesn’t work (and is in fact illegal), telling people that sex is magnificent, but only in the context of marriage, doesn’t work. Mind you, somebody once told me that if the message upsets one person, then that doesn’t me that we should look for another way of communicating that idea, but I disagree because for every person that complains, there are a number of people that will either suffer in silence, or will simply give up and just walk out of the church.

[Hannah Belcher · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was keen to see a different perspective on this debate, that of a homosexual Christian man, who was choosing to abstain from sex and remain celibate. Whilst I applaud him for his perseverance, and what is clearly his calling, I remain completely unconvinced that this is a lifestyle intended for all gay Christians. Internalised homophobia seeps through the pages, the author won't even call himself gay he's 'same sex attracted', as if being gay was lifestyle choice rather than a naturally wired sexual orientation. He also offers no evidence, or barely any, from the bible itself. Choosing to quote instead cis gendered and heterosexual males, whose views are quite frankly ignorant. He goes on to discuss how suffering is to be more Christ like, which to me verged into the territory of self flagilation - whilst he may not be encouraging physical harm to oneself he does suggest psychological harm is a good thing to do. What is being suggested here is not plausible at all. I really do admire his strength and perseverance here, but this is his own calling and not one evidenced to be suitable for all. As a psychologist I couldn't help but note the cognitive dissonance here of the author, split between a life condemned by the church or one of being denied his sexual identity. The whole book read as a convincing cognitive argument he'd formed over the years to reconcile this dissonance. The book is written respectfully and compassionately however, and it was easier to read than some on this topic. But I would encourage people to also read texts that cite more biblical evidence like 'Christianity and homosexuality reconciled'.

[Rachel Vincent · Rating 5 out of 5]

It has been so helpful to see how as Christians we haven't faced same sex attraction in the way we should. This is a really great book if you don't know what to think or how to be loving to those struggling. We must be kind and remind ourselves that our identity is in Christ, not our sexuality in order to help protect ourselves and others from "kitchen floor" moments.

[Sean Gavin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ed Shaw has written a brilliant book that helps the whole church see how we all can live in a way that celebrates marriage but also makes singleness and celibacy a Plausible option for Same-sex attracted (SSA) Christians.

Shaw addresses nice missteps the church takes and discussed how addressing them would make a celibate lifestyle more viable. However, as I read them I think that addressing these missteps would help the gospel to shine brighter and our hearts to be warmed to Jesus.

If you’re looking for a book that sets out the argument for the orthodox view on marriage, then maybe this isn’t the book you are looking for. If you are looking for a book that will help you support singles (SSA or heterosexual) then this book is worth a read.

It’s helped me to start to think about how I can live in a way that supports other single Christians more and helps them honour Jesus in their live.

[Matt Chapman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a helpful book on this topic. More than that, this is just a really good book on Christian discipleship. It's inspiring and compelling for individuals and for whole churches. Leaves me wanting to follow Christ even more radically, wholeheartedly and joyfully than before.

[Christina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book built on biblical truth, it is kind, and it is empathetic. It has taught me so much about love and family and embracing one another, so that we can all grow to be more like Christ.

I wish I could plug a digital file of this book into the head of every Christian I know, and that they would instantly Get it. I would start with my pastor. I would end after I had downloaded it into the brain of every single Christian I have ever met, and not before.

God loves us, friends. Even the gay ones. Especially the gay ones.

Five out of five stars, because wow. Thank you, Ed Shaw.

Total score: 5/5 stars

[Sarah Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book helped me to better understand why many same-sex attracted Christians live celibate lives, but it isn't just a good read for homosexuals/bisexuals, it's got some good points for heterosexuals too. It emphasises the value of church family in combatting loneliness and allowing for non-sexual intimacy. It made me reflect on how I could make my friendships deeper. There is also a challenging chapter on suffering for Jesus and how Jesus challenges us to take up our crosses for him. However, I don't think it is wise to deny ourselves things we need (as Shaw writes) unless it is on a temporary basis (like fasting for example). Also, I didn't agree that heterosexual relationships have more 'healthy tension' than homosexual ones, as this would depend more on individual personalities than one's gender. Shaw makes loads of other good points, such as godliness being more about Christ-likeness than being straight, but I still don't fully understand why acting on same-sex desires is wrong. I am yet to find a satisfactory explanation for this.

[cindy · Rating 1 out of 5]

An attempt to read diversely and about stances I don’t align with. I do think--for someone who believes the premises this author starts with--that this is one of the better, more thorough treatments of the topic available. I applaud its call for the Church to provide familial-level community and support for its congregants: single and coupled alike.

Something I'd like to briefly point out--because I'm not trying to start a debate in a Goodreads comment thread--is that in Appendix 2, the author critiques the work of several liberal writers on the subject. He accuses them, among other things, of lack of nuance and failure to take into account the "full biblical theological context" in their interpretation. It is curious to note that these same argument may be fully--and aptly--applied to the author's own work.

rec: Euston Church

[Beth · Rating 5 out of 5]

It normally takes me some time and effort to read through a Christian doctrinal book but I couldn't put this one down. So good.
An incredibly challenging read but full of truth that this generation needs!
The writer approaches the subject with warmth, honesty and even humour in some parts. He understands and acknowledges the difficulties but remains firm in following what the Bible teaches. Not in a strict, pious, rule-following way, but a genuine belief and explanation that God's word DOES make sense and it IS the best way to live. Really.
I would recommend to all Christians, not just those who experience or know someone who experiences same sex attraction. It's a book for all and I will definitely read again.

[Jonathan Sussex · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having heard Ed Shaw speak, it was good to read the book. Its sure to leave the reader with a challenge, for me it is how i can show practical love and care for those in the body who are crying out for meaningful relationships

[Solveig · Rating 5 out of 5]

Challenging, insightful and interesting. Very well worth reading and applying

[Eddie · Rating 4 out of 5]

The final chapter on suffering is worth the price of admission alone but the other chapters are clear and excellent too.

[Gareth Davies · Rating 4 out of 5]

Challenging read, especially the chapters on church family and friendship.

[Joel · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the more insightful books I've read recently. More than just insightful, it was particularly challenging in exposing my own blind spots. Ed writes thoughtfully on the topic of homosexuality and in particular, how the church can think more biblically about sexuality and godliness as a whole.

Of the nine missteps he talked about, I found misstep no. 2 & 7 especially helpful.

Misstep no. 2 "A family is Mum, Dad and 2.4 children" - this chapter cuts against the grain of my home culture where the biological family unit is highly respected (and rightly so). If that definition were to be right, it would be natural for someone trying to remain celibate to feel like he/she is missing out. However, Jesus himself revolutionalises this concept of family and defines it as the church, fellow believers who are part of the heavenly family. Here Ed writes "And, crucially, this new family benefits us all - there is give and take from all of us, all of the time. It strengthens single people, but it also strengthens marriages. It allows children to grow up in an environment where there are multiple adults parenting them." As more of us live out Jesus' definition of family, the call to remain celibate becomes more plausible.

Misstep no. 7 "Godliness is heterosexuality" - In the bid to fight for the biblical definition of marriage, there has been unhelpful rhetoric against homosexuality which has resulted in it being elevated as a worse sin than others. Yet, The Bible is clear that godliness involves every aspect of life. Writing against this misstep Ed says "What needs to be heard more is what the Bible says: that the gospel of grace demands Christ-likeness of us in every area of life. That's what our children need to hear from us so that if they grow up to be same-sex attracted, they don't conclude that they can't be Christians, but instead see this as just another challenging context (among many others) in which to become more and more like Jesus, all in response to the most challenging context of all - the cross- that he went through for us."

At the heart of his argument, Ed is deciding to stay on this path, not because of individual proof texts from scripture but rather compelled by the overall narrative of the biblical story. "Like a piece from a jigsaw puzzle finally locked into its rightful place, the Bible and the church's no to homosexual behavior make sense... when I look at it as one piece within the larger Christian narrative. I abstain from homosexual behavior because of the power of the Scriptural story." This must be true for all (homo/bi/heterosexual individuals) who believe in Jesus.

[Thomas · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ed Shaw har skrevet en dybt bevægende, inderligt modig, hamrende politisk ukorrekt, teologisk velargumenteret bog, som han kun kan og har ret til at skrive i kraft af selv at være homoseksuel. Her er langt bedre hjælp og udfordring til kirken og kristne (både hetero- og homoseksuelle) end den snæversynede, polariserende, træ-agtige polemik, man ellers finder i meget af det, der i øvrigt er skrevet om emnet.

[Scott Cox · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ed Shaw is vicar of a Church of England congregation in Bristol, England. Rev. Shaw also honestly and openly struggles with “same-sex attraction.” In his closing acknowledgements, he quotes American writer Flannery O’Connor, “all writing is painful and . . . if it is not painful then it is not worth doing.” I’m sure that this book must have indeed been painful for Rev. Shaw to organize and develop. The book posits “the plausibility problem” as to why the Bible’s message regarding homosexuality no longer seems plausible to many in today’s church. He proceeds to detail nine “missteps” which lend themselves to this lack of plausibility. First, Christians have bought into the misleading concept regarding labels such as “gay” (a relatively new, postmodern philosophical construct). Rather, irrespective of our struggle, we should endeavor to shun societal labels and instead seek our true identity in Christ. Second, we should not belittle those who cannot marry and have children as being in any way less fulfilled than those who remain single. Shaw eloquently reminds the church that Christ and the Apostle Paul never married, and that both found “family” in the people of God. Third, Shaw briefly touches on the controversy surrounding homosexual origins. Though dismissing the evidence of any so-called “gay gene,” the author posits the possibility that original sin has corrupted every facet of life, including our innate sexuality. Though our sexuality may feel instinctive, our impulses are still controllable with the help of the Holy Spirit. Fourth, Shaw questions the notion that we must each strive for happiness in the way of fulfilling our sexual desires. Shaw adroitly notes that there is a deeper, and more fulfilling happiness associated being in an obedient relationship with our loving Savior. Fifth, true intimacy can be obtained and nurtured apart from sexual relationships. This is especially striking in King David’s lament for his friend Jonathan, “ . . . you were very dear to me. Your love for me was wonderful, more wonderful than that of women” (2 Samuel 1:26). Sixth, the author tackles the complex subject of gender equality and God-given roles. Shaw challenges the reader to think of the two sexes, and even sex, as a “trailer for life in the world to come.” Specifically, the pleasures of this world are but previews of the real joys to come in eternity. Seventh, Shaw debunks the idea that Godliness is heterosexuality. Rather he reminds us that true Godliness is being Christ-like. Eighth, he posits the question, “Is celibacy bad for you?” In 1 Corinthians chapter 7, the Apostle Paul calls celibacy a gift, one that he wishes “all of you” possessed (verse 7). Ninth, Shaw does not deny that celibacy contains an aspect of suffering, but rather, he encourages Christians to remember that Christ calls each of us to suffer in the way of self-denial. We must be willing to die to self, in order to live for Christ. In summary, this book is a helpful challenge to Christians and churches to recommit themselves to Biblical principals regarding sexuality. Do I agree with everything Shaw posits or with every nuance or phrase? No. But this work should provide much hope and encouragement to those who struggle with same-sex attraction, and to churches that seek to minister to members who are seeking to remain faithful to Christ and his Word.

[Caspian Scott · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ed Shaw is a good writer with a passion and love for sharing Jesus, taking his faith as a celibate same sex attracted Christian very seriously. This book was an inspiring read. Shaw argues that it is both plausible and necessary for all same sex attracted Christians to live out life-long celibacy. He explains how his church community has been so supportive through his struggles, and that intimate friendships and family can replace sexual intimacy in his life altogether. Unfortunately, most same sex attracted people don’t have the luxury to experience this in the same way as Shaw, since the LGBT community are a marginalised group who are often neglected by their own parents and churches. Shaw is calling for a change in these church and cultural attitudes though. In the foreword, while Vaughan Roberts claims The Plausibility Problem is “radical” and “challenging all believers to a comprehensive reformation of thinking and behaviour”, I just don’t see the book meet those expectations. Ed Shaw holds to conservative and traditional Biblical interpretations on homosexuality. Even his call for a change in church behaviour has been cried out for decades from others before him. I don’t see anything radical here. In fact, in the appendices, Shaw attempts to rebuke a number of modern revisionist texts which are radical. He attacks authors such as Matthew Vines with a black and white “he is wrong, I am right” approach, criticising his literary technique rather than actually considering and responding to his arguments. Shaw’s book is an important read for Christians, though I think Christians should read the revisionist texts for themselves too. Shaw spends a long time arguing that suffering is necessary for all Christians, hence thinking that the suffering of celibacy is needed for every single gay Christian. But then a significant part of the book is creating strategies for churches to limit suffering for same sex attracted people, and often I am confused at these contradictions in his position. He also explains (really well I must say) how marriage is a special symbol that represents Christ’s relationship and covenant with his church, but it felt like he was saying that same sex attracted people will never be able to truly experience this foreshadowing symbol. It’s just not fair for them to miss out on such a beautiful gift of God’s creation. Time to see what these revisionist texts have to offer.

[Lydia · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very clear, honest and insightful book of the struggles of a same sex attracted Christian. Really highlighted common apathy's of both christians and non-christians and remarkably showed how it actually can be plausible to be both a Christian and have same sex attraction. Extremely relevant - would recommend.

[Alice Gent · Rating 5 out of 5]

Without a doubt one of the most helpful Christian books i have ever read and really challenged me to become a better church family member.

[Jason Blean · Rating 5 out of 5]

Few issues are as controversial and arouse such heated debate in our Western world today than that of sexuality and same-sex relationships. In a world where the sex drive is exploited to sell us everything from deodorant to food and much else, and where conflicting and contradicting messages are sent out by church and society on this area of our lives it is refreshing to read some clear-thinking on it. Appropriately, for a very personal issue, Shaw illustrates the dilemma of same-sex attracted Christians via personal examples, of "Peter" and "Jane", both heavily involved in church life that takes the Bible's teaching on sex and relationships seriously yet struggling to deal with their same-sex attractions and the seemingly unreasonable demands of living in the light of Biblical teaching.

Ed Shaw adds huge credibility to his own advice when he adds that he has always been same-sex attracted as he develops how the church can be more supportive to the Peters and Janes in it by offering much more support than the "Just say no!" approach. Speaking from his own personal experience (as a celibate same-sex attracted pastor of a British evangelical church) adds weight to what he says.

Shaw exposes the many "missteps" (some of them myths and/or idolatries) prevalent in church and society from "Your identity is your sexuality" to "Suffering is to be avoided", all of which reinforce the idea of the unreasonableness of Bible teaching in this area but which, in fact, when examined turn out to be unreasonable ideas in themselves.

Shaw, in contrast to many evangelicals, shows that in his experience it is possible to have sexual feelings for your own sex only from puberty, but then dismantles the "if I was born gay it can't be wrong" argument. Importantly, he also criticises the church for idolising marriage (when its own founder was single!) with the attitude "A family is Mum, Dad and 2.4 children" (1.6 in the UK when I last looked) but he goes further: he convincingly suggests (again using his own experience) that an unmarried Christian man can find a loving, fulfilling and supportive family and a full life in his brothers and sisters (sons, fathers and mothers) in the church.

He ends with setting out the plausibility of the traditional interpretation of Scripture via the 4 "Acts" of the Bible, looking at Scripture in its totality: I Creation, II Rebellion III Redemption and IV Perfection, and how reasonable in fact God is with us through His loving response to our rebellion. This is balanced and complemented with an analysis of the implausibility of the new interpretations of Scripture, exposing some of the glaring contradictions of influential people such as Jeffrey John, Justin Lee, James Brownson and Matthew Vines. He identifies the tools they use (emotion, polarization and doubt) to cherry-pick the Bible, interpret passages wildly out of context and rely heavily on extra-biblical sources to promote their views.

This is a well-constructed and sourced book with an important and much-needed message of hope for those Christians who for far too long have struggled (often very much alone) with this issue and been dismissed with simplistic or inadequate responses from their church family. Read and be encouraged!

[Adam Thomas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Is it plausible to expect same-sex attracted Christians to follow historic biblical teaching on sexuality? Ed Shaw, who himself experiences same-sex attraction, has learned that the answer is "Yes" – but as evangelicals, we can make life harder for our SSA brothers and sisters, by committing some serious theological "mis-steps" that make a celibate life seem unreasonable and implausible. This is the plausibility problem.

In this book, Shaw corrects these mis-steps to show how celibate SSA Christians can still experience "life to the full", trusting that Jesus's way is the best way to live. Among other things, he shows how our fundamental identity is in our union with Christ, not our sexuality; how true intimacy is found in friendships, not just in sex; how godliness is about Christlikeness, not who you're attracted to; and how singleness is a good gift.

His aim throughout is both to encourage SSA Christians, and to challenge the wider church to reflection and repentance. This latter aim means that the book has implications far beyond questions of sexuality, and offers a hope-filled vision for inclusive church life and faithful Christian discipleship. He is less concerned with outlining the Bible's teaching on homosexuality (for which you'd want to look at his helpful bibliography) and more concerned with placing this teaching within its wider biblical story.

Ed Shaw writes with an amazing honesty about his own experiences, and the result is a very helpful contribution to the ongoing debate around sexuality. I'd recommend this to a range of people, including pastors wanting to understand the struggles of SSA Christians and offer wise and compassionate encouragement.

[Nathanael Ayling · Rating 5 out of 5]

The presenting issue of this book is same sex attraction.
It was a valuable insight into what it is like for someone to struggle with that particular issue. It helped me to imagine what it is like and thus be more understanding and sympathetic to those I know who struggle in this area.

This book gives a clear explanation of what the Bible says on this topic. It also gives a very honest and vulnerable personal account of one man's experience of this issue.

But what Ed Shaw advocates in this book is not just for people who struggle with same sex attraction. It is not just for those who want to help people who struggle with same sex attraction.
What he is advocating here is a basic requirement of all of us who want to or claim to follow Jesus: laying down our lives, giving up everything for Him.
This is the true cost of following Jesus. This is what it means to be a follower of Jesus. The problem is that we have become to comfortable with less than this. We have gotten used to "following Jesus" whilst also doing our own thing. We shy away from sacrifice. We gravitate towards living for me, whatever suits me.

The meat of the book consists of certain missteps we have made in general as a Church in the West.

1. Your identity is your sexuality.
2. A family is mum, dad and 2.4 children.
3. If you're born gay, it can't be wrong to be gay.
4. If it makes you happy, it must be right!
5. Sex is where true intimacy is found.
6. Men and women are equal and interchangeable.
7. Godliness is heterosexuality.
8. Celibacy is bad for you.
9. Suffering is to be avoided.

Looking at that list, it looks like something you'd expect our culture around us to say. But Ed shows how these ideas have imperceptibly seeped into the Church.

This book has helped me to better understand my friends who struggle with same sex attraction. It has also challenged me to look carefully at whether I am really following Jesus as I should.
I highly recommend it!

[Steve · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the approach: the plausibility of defending a Biblical view of sexuality in an accepting culture and the practical cost of living faithfully and under the pressure of conformity.

If I was looking at this book as a “standalone“ item then it was very helpful on a number fronts:

1. Understanding the struggles of somebody who has an unnatural desire and has not been able to change that desire, and therefore cannot marry;

2. The challenge of helping single people, which our churches have not always been very good at, because so family focused.

3. The disconcerting thing is the way that he constantly refers to his desire for men, whilst it is clear that he believes this desire is wrong and a form of suffering.

4. Shaw does not use the “gay Christian“ label-instead "same-sex attracted" as a description of his struggle.

I did learn a lot from the book, however I am left with a slight “discomfort“ because the desire we are discussing is not only a sinful one (like lust, greed, covetousness), but also a non-natural one.

I was more concerned about what Shaw has written elsewhere that is more positive about same-sex desire, e.g. seeing the good in faithful gay monogamous relationships etc.

[Phil Whittall · Rating 4 out of 5]

The problem, as Ed Shaw sees it, is that the church has not made the case that a single life, a celibate life for anyone (and in this case especially same-sex attracted people) to be possible or even plausible let alone dare I say it desirable. Shaw defends compellingly the historic teaching of the church that sex is for marriage and marriage is between a man and a woman. Yet the reason, for many, that the idea of a life without either sex or marriage seems to be cruel and unjust is that the common life of the church is often so impoverished. I greatly appreciated his call for the church to do better, not just for gay people but for all people who may find themselves alone, so that no one is starved of community, intimacy, and love. As someone said, 'this is how the world will know that you are my disciples, by the way you love one another'.

So Shaw seeks to demonstrate how a life committed to this teaching is possible, plausible and worth celebrating. I think he succeeds.

Recommended.

[Rohan · Rating 5 out of 5]

The final chapter on suffering is 5 stars, absolutely worth reading.
"Follow a successful king and you share in his success; follow a suffering king and you share in his sufferings". With a powerful hymn by John Newtown that nearly made my sleep-deprivated, angry-at-God-for-not-answering-prayers-for-more-sleep cry, including this stanza.

Lord, why is this, I trembling cried,
Wilt thou pursue thy worm to death?
“‘Tis in this way, the Lord replied,
I answer prayer for grace and faith.

And he did have some powerful lines / ideas.
- Heterosexuality is NOT godliness. Being more Christ-like is!
- If churches aren't counter cultural in other areas of life, why expect same-sex attracted people to be counter cultural? (When is the last time you gave away a sacrificial amount of money, but you expect someone to sacrificially "give away" their sexuality for a lifetime?)

I was going to give it 4 stars (I still think 7 myths about singleness was better), but I actually realise they dovetail really well so let's do 5 stars for this too, and just read both!

[Yrag Notsew · Rating 4 out of 5]

Here is a really good book. Pity the title. It isn't gripping is it? But that boring title aside, here is the same-sex-attracted issue discussed in a way that is: biblical, personal, compassionate, helpful, challenging and highly readable and easily understandable! I want everyone to read this. Even if same-sex-attraction is never on your own radar, read this to help all the rest of the world who are trying to understand it. Even apart from the whole same-sex-attraction topic, this book is good for just plain, basic discipleship training . Read it to better come to grips with the Lordship of Christ, and what it means to "deny yourself and take up your cross". If you want to get a better grasp of the biblical view of suffering, celibacy, godliness, and/or marriage, this is the book for you. I doubt you'll agree with everything he says, (of course!) but you'll benefit from most of what he says. I'd be interested to hear what you think.