Leave the Building Quickly: True Stories

by Cynthia Kaplan

Do you know why a race-car driver wears epaulets despite the fact that epaulets would seem in every way contrary to the aesthetic of a race-car driver? It's so that in the event of a crash he may be pulled from the flaming wreckage of his car. Yes, she's back. Cynthia Kaplan, acclaimed author of Why I'm Like This , once again invites us into her no-holds-barred, take-no-prisoners world, casting her gimlet eye upon the current state of her affairs. Also of your affairs, and some other people's affairs, too. With her unique talent for wringing hilarity out of the most devastating situations (as well as, it must be admitted, the most trivial), Kaplan fearlessly takes on her family, intelligent design, Narnia, New England's deer population—all the important issues of the day. Journey with her as she humiliates herself in a variety of locales—a dude ranch, a hospital, Mystic Seaport, the offices of Comedy Central. Cower beside her as she confronts her inner (and outer) most fears. No threat is too small—pajamas, schnauzers, Disney cruises. No subject is sacrosanct—God, sex, The Nutcracker Suite . Kaplan has a worst-case scenario planned for, well, every scenario, including high school reunions and vacationing with your mother-in-law, a subject not covered in any of today's popular guidebooks. You might want to take notes, because Kaplan has that rare ability to write about her own life in a way that makes you feel as though she is writing about yours. Leave the Building Quickly is a raucously funny, moving, and honest look at the circumstances of our daily lives, the kind that inspire us to crouch in the linen closet at three in the morning. That's okay. Kaplan is there, too. And she's brought snacks.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Memoir, Essays, Short Stories

224 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2007

Reviews

[Meg Morden · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well I did what you are not supposed to do, choose a book by its cover! I was drawn in by the border terrier being lifted by balloons as I owned a border terrier and I persevered to the end primarily to find the story/anecdote about the dog! There was none but along the way I found elements to amuse and educate but I also found much to irritate. It is well written but she seems to be filled with fear about a wide assortment of things which sometimes comes very close to whinging! I found it most intriguing as an example of essay writing which I have been trying to do myself. She does have a strong command on the genre and has a nice structural sense. So although there were no dogs, I do not regret reading it at all.

[John · Rating 3 out of 5]

One of the essays in this collection ("Very Special Thanks") serves as Kaplan's sarcastic rebuttal to a friend who "mentored" her, without providing any actual assistance. He criticized her first book for not having any identifiable theme. I don't recall that as having been a problem myself when I read it. However, there is a flaw in this book: the stories are all over the place, in no particular order. There's a funny one about cruises, and then a serious look back at Alzheimer's effect on her grandmother. Both are very well done, but don't complement each other. Given the way the essays are laid out, I see this book pleasing nearly no one - a shame as she's a really good writer, who does both serious and funny well, just not alternatingly in the same book.

[Anjeanette McKay · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cynthia Kaplan has done it again! This book is laugh-out-loud funny, as she muses about God, the evolution of deer, Peter and the Wolf and countless other topics. Every one of these biographical stories is either completely relevant, or completely irrelevant, but always worth the read! I highly recommend this one to women, especially mothers; and to dudes, like my boyfriend, who get it.

[Claudia · Rating 4 out of 5]

These stories aren't as laugh-out-loud funny as those by David Sedaris, but I don't think they're meant to be. She is more honest and reflective, and some of the essays put into clear words some of the nebulous frustrations of my own life. I'd love to hang out with this woman!

[JulieK · Rating 3 out of 5]

More thoughtful than the quirky! madcap! packaging implies.

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed many of the essays in Cynthia Kaplan’s book, “Leave the Building Quickly”. She is very humorous, but also brutally honest in sharing stories which expose her quirkiness, short comings, and some times irrational fears.

The book is a collection of essays that can each stand alone, however, I often thought the sequence of these essays interfered with the flow of the book. This is the first book I have read of hers (published in 2007). I would like to read more of her writing....maybe her book “Why I’m Like This”.

[Allison Roy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Random grab from the humor shelf at a used bookstore. Also happens to be a signed copy. Cynthia talks a lot about being an actor (but I don’t recognize her from anything), but BOIIIIII I do love her writing. Very similar to David Sedaris short stories (my favorite kinds of humor) except slightly more personally relatable (motherhood, her thoughts on cruises, etc). I really enjoy her writing and I’m definitely going to look into more.

[Jenni K · Rating 2 out of 5]

Another example of “dont judge a book by its cover”!
Here looks like a happy little read
Uggh!! Another slog fest, did finish the read- begrudgingly,
However all chosen for the local genre book challenge

[Mitchell Easter · Rating 4 out of 5]

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[Kristi Bumpus · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my kind of humor, I guess.

[Mandy · Rating 3 out of 5]

A family friend gave me Leave the Building Quickly for Christmas and at the end of the month when I realized I hadn’t read a non-fiction book yet (part of my goals for the year), I was excited to remember this book was sitting on my coffee table. I’d never heard of Cynthia Kaplan, but as a fan of other funny memoirists like David Sedaris and Augusten Burroughs, I was looking forward to seeing what awaited me.

Writer and actress Cynthia Kaplan has had essays published in numerous newspapers and magazines including The New York Times, New York Magazine, Self and Health. This book, as well as her debut book, Why I’m Like This, is a compilation of true stories about Kaplan’s life. The amusing essays are candid and honest reflections on a wide variety of topics including sex, family vacations, religion, death, family and relationships.

The book’s no holds barred writing expresses what we often think to ourselves but would never say out loud. Kaplan has no problem expressing her neurotic fears and tendencies but does so with humor and sarcasm.


Leave the Building Quickly was published in 2007 by Harper Collins.

[Alison · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was so excited when I learned that Cynthia Kaplan had another book out—I received her first collection, "Why I'm Like This," as a gift a couple of years ago and absolutely loved it. So the fact that I didn't love this one as much might not be a reflection on this collection itself, but just that the first one was so great, anything else might pale in comparison. I did feel like there were a couple of essays in this one that fell a bit flat. But I really loved (and related to) the essay about how she tried to convince her grandmother (struggling with dementia) to use an American Express card, and the one about her relationship with her older brother. Overall, it just didn't "zing" for me the way the first collection did, but I still love her voice and the mixture of reflective thoughtfulness and humor.

[Sue Burton · Rating 4 out of 5]

Wow, I was very pleasantly suprised -- this was an Amazon impulse buy "my suggested fries with that" that came with David Sedaris's latest. Cynthia Kaplan has a fresh, authentic, witty voice that was engaging, truthful and clever. I really enjoyed each of her anecdotes & reading the book felt like sharing a wonderful cup of coffee with a good friend who always makes you think "why don't I hang out with her more -- She's hilarious and tuned in." I'm a fan & buying her 1st book.

[Douglas · Rating 1 out of 5]

As a child I was introduce to fun essay writing while sneaking my Mom's books by Harry Golden, Art Buchwald and Erma Bombeck. I love a witty, friendly essay about almost anything.

Ms. Kaplan started strong with a fun romp on a Disney cruise. Then it tapers off quickly.
Not everything in your life is interesting, I labored through a yawner about growing up with her brother, finally giving up after one too many obligatory bash Bush statements.

[Erika · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book was exactly as it stated "short stories", they seemed to of been chosen radomly from her journals. I appreciated some of them, but not all. One of the stories talked about "her mentor"-I believe this person to be one of my favorite authors Augusten Burroughs, but I may be totally off. haha Strange.

[Marcia · Rating 2 out of 5]

I had read a rave review which led me to this book in search of some good laughs. They were not to be found. In one of the first chapters the author describes good humor as laughing out loud while nodding your head in recognition. I nodded a few times, but there were no laughs. One small chuckle maybe...

[Valerie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some of the essays here are funny, but I didn't enjoy this collection as much as her first collection "Why I'm Like This." Many of the essays meandered, with no apparent focus or purpose. They read almost like a stream of consciousness. I'd say skip this one, but definitely read "Why I'm Like This."

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Love it so far! All Aboard is my life with Scott's family...on & off a cruise ship. Thought this was my own entry, ha! Ballads of Rusty Magee is especially poignant to me, as my best friend from h.s. is suffering from a terminal illness and this exerpt spoke VOLUMES to me. I need to keep reading...

[April McNulty]

Stopped reading this book in the middle of a chapter. While I can laugh at the porn tapes her husband gives her for Valentine's Day, I was unentertained at her "reasons" for no longer believeing in God and her cheap shot at religion and those who do believe. As I am not being forced to read this book, I chose to throw it away instead. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone I know.

[Martha · Rating 3 out of 5]

I loved Kaplan's first book, Why I'm Like This, so I was very excited to read this one. Unfortunately, Leave the Building Quickly was just not as good. It was good, yes, but not as good as it's predecessor.

[Kim · Rating 3 out of 5]

Entertaining enough; her thoughts re working and parenting were comforting to me (how for a woman you give up so much - your body, career in some fashion at least, etc.). Each chapter is a short story, so easy to read.

[Lynn · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really enjoyed 'Why I'm Like this' by Kaplan several years ago. This, her next book too was an entertaining, fun, mostly light read. Particularly enjoyed her audition for the Jon Stewart show where she completely sabotages herself! Liberal use of 4 letter words if that bothers you.

[pb · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cynthia rocks! Another enjoyable read. I thought even better than her first book. A lot of good laugh out loud moments.

[Erin Ens · Rating 2 out of 5]

I didn't enjoy this the way I did her first. She still has a few great stories, but I was not as addicted to it as I was to Why I'm Like This.

[Marilyn · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like to read satire by sarcastic writers--this book definitely fits the bill. The last 2 chapters were not up to the rest of the book but until then it was great.

[Tamara · Rating 3 out of 5]

A humorous/poignant collection of short stories. Gave me a new perspective on Drops of Jupiter. Purchased this book at the 2007 Jewish Book Fair and met the author!

[Danielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

A really good collection of short essays. Not as great as "I was told there'd be cake," but close.

[Lora · Rating 3 out of 5]

this is a pretty funny collection of essays. i was surprised!

[Rebecca Avery · Rating 1 out of 5]

DFid not like this one. I still have not finished it.

[Maria · Rating 4 out of 5]

Enjoyable and funny. I read this before I discovered David Sedaris. I think he is a better read, although they both reminisce about growing up with atypical homelives in the sixties/seventies.