The Beast

TNT #2

by Doug Masters

Anthony Nicholas Twin, known as TNT, parachutes into Russia in order to rescue a top scientist, Dr. Vilunskas, from a Soviet gulag.

Genres: Pulp

208 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 1985

Reviews

[Mikepottz · Rating 3 out of 5]

TNT wakes up after being drugged in a SR-71 at an altitude of 200 thousand feet. A new alloy has been invented, indestructible to fire, artillery and even nuclear bombs. TNT ejected from the aircraft and plummeting to earth. His mission is to get the inventor from a impenetrable prison in Russia. A mention of Australia is a place where hygienic condition are acceptable haha. TNT being tranformed from a nuclear blast has an array of extraordinary strengths. His eyes are like zoom lenses, able to immediately analyze and identify things he touches and can hold his breath for 15 minutes. He is able to escape with the inventor and his specially made alloy which is now a rectangular shaped flying machine in pink. Yes is true and bloody bonkers and survives a nuclear blast.

[Kurt Reichenbaugh · Rating 2 out of 5]

Okay, tell me if you've heard this one before. Our hero, Tony Nicholas Twin (TNT) is drugged and stuffed into an SR-71 and sent to Russia, actually the Soviet Union back when this was written, on a mission to retrieve this egghead scientist who's invented a neutrino telescope and is being held captive inside this impenetrable prison fortress in central Asia. TNT has super-human powers thanks to a massive dose of radiation he was subjected to from a bomb or something, it's not really explained in this book. He's also sexually insatiable, if that matters. Along the way he's helped by a disgraced Russian weightlifter and a beautiful mystery woman named Arkady, who are both somehow connected to a mythic Golden Horde they all talk about.

"It used to be a kingdom," she said, "but the past is dead. Now The Golden Horde is the name of an organization seeking greater equality and justice for what the Russians call the 'Nationalities,' the ethnic republics. I am Circassian, Mr. Twin. For centuries Circassian women have been known for their beauty. We have been the prize ornament of many a harem. I come from generations and generations of slaves bred solely for the pleasure of men."

...And you're probably astute enough see where this is going between Arkady and TNT. It turns out, Arkady has a twin also held within the prison, and she demands TNT get him out, or else she'll kill him. Anyway, TNT manages to get to the prison where a mad colonel, nicknamed The Bat because he's blind and hides his empty eye sockets behind mirrored glasses and manages to get around via some kind of mental radar, runs the joint while devising various ways to torture and kill its occupants. There is also a chamber of hanging corpses inside the compound for reasons I'm not really sure of. It's something that the mad Colonel Bat gets off on, apparently. Once inside the plot kind of explodes all over the place. And not in a good way. TNT and gang, including our twins both named Arkady, end up inside this indestructible gigantic rolling tank-like thing named The Beast. And it rolls all over shit creating havoc and destruction in its wake.

Not sure whatever happened to The Golden Horde. If the book was named "The Golden Horde" then we'd probably find out. But it isn't. It's named The Beast. So, there you go. Another book you can tell the other parents all about during the next children's birthday party you're stuck going to. They'll be duly impressed, I'm sure.

I've got three more books in this series on my shelf. It's a safe bet you'll be hearing more about TNT from me in the future.

[I.D. · Rating 3 out of 5]

While not as bat-sh#t insane as book 1, there were still a couple of really unsettling scenes, i.e.) sex scene in a room full of dangling corpses. But the plot was wafer thin and there wasn't really anything for TNT to do other than hold his breath a long time and then ride in a giant big car. Overall a bit of a let down after then weirdness of book 1.