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(Help, Thanks, Wow) [By: Anne Lamott] [Feb, 2013]
Help Thanks Wow( The Three Essential Prayers) <> Compact Disc <> AnneLamott <> BrillianceCorporation
Hardcover
First published November 13, 2012
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About the author
Anne Lamott
86 books10.2k followersAnne Lamott is an author of several novels and works of non-fiction. Based in the San Francisco Bay Area, her non-fiction works are largely autobiographical, with strong doses of self-deprecating humor and covering such subjects as alcoholism, single motherhood, and Christianity. She appeals to her fans because of her sense of humor, her deeply felt insights, and her outspoken views on topics such as her left-of-center politics and her unconventional Christian faith. She is a graduate of Drew College Preparatory School in San Francisco, California. Her father, Kenneth Lamott, was also a writer and was the basis of her first novel Hard Laughter.
Lamott's life is documented in Freida Lee Mock's 1999 documentary Bird by Bird: A Film Portrait of Writer Anne Lamott.
Lamott's life is documented in Freida Lee Mock's 1999 documentary Bird by Bird: A Film Portrait of Writer Anne Lamott.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 2,648 reviews
April 2, 2020
This slim book consists of three essays on spirituality, each exploring a different type of prayer: petition ("Help!"), thanksgiving ("Thanks!") and ("Wow!), which I feel can best be described as prayer in praise of the sublime.
I have read two previous books on spirituality by Lamott, both longer and better than this one, but they all have the same qualities. Lamott is so frank about sharing her brokenness, all the fragments of her crazy hippie life, that we hope we too--if we had half her courage--could reap the rewards of prayer at least as bountifully as she. And yet . . . the prose with which she describes her life is so elegant--so sleek in its zen concentration, so studded with remarkable phrases--that we fear she has moved far beyond us, and feel humbled when faced with her clarity and wisdom.
That said, though elegant and wise, this book is still a trifle: "Help" is better than "Thanks," "Thanks" is better than "Wow," and the brief concluding essay is inferior to the other three. Still, I recommend it. Clarity and wisdom, humility and hope--all from one little book.
January 3, 2013
I am a tremendous admirer of Anne Lamott and her many books. I've been looking forward to reading this book for some weeks. Now that I have, I must say that I am disappointed.
First, the book is way too expensive for the length that it is. And I am not even sure if it was worth being made into a hard cover.
Second, the book really did not strike me as being profound or even notable. While there are some good ideas in Help, Thanks, Wow - they are not terribly radical or new. Unless one is rather new to spirituality, most of the material in this book is a narrative repackaging of the much larger themes common to many world religions - Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, etc.
Third, I found reading the book to be much like reading Anne Lamott's latest posts on Facebook. Her writing style was not the same quality as is found in her other books. Rather, it left me with the feeling that she was rambling. (Perhaps, much like my review.) To get a sense of the writing in Help, Thanks, Wow, read her Facebook posts. Sure, they can be amusing or you may find yourself relating to her experiences. But don't plan on going back to them for later inspiration.
I must confess, I am sad to write this review. I really have enjoyed Anne's books and have found her story to be inspiring. But regarding this book, I can't share that same praise.
First, the book is way too expensive for the length that it is. And I am not even sure if it was worth being made into a hard cover.
Second, the book really did not strike me as being profound or even notable. While there are some good ideas in Help, Thanks, Wow - they are not terribly radical or new. Unless one is rather new to spirituality, most of the material in this book is a narrative repackaging of the much larger themes common to many world religions - Christianity, Judaism, Buddhism, etc.
Third, I found reading the book to be much like reading Anne Lamott's latest posts on Facebook. Her writing style was not the same quality as is found in her other books. Rather, it left me with the feeling that she was rambling. (Perhaps, much like my review.) To get a sense of the writing in Help, Thanks, Wow, read her Facebook posts. Sure, they can be amusing or you may find yourself relating to her experiences. But don't plan on going back to them for later inspiration.
I must confess, I am sad to write this review. I really have enjoyed Anne's books and have found her story to be inspiring. But regarding this book, I can't share that same praise.
March 17, 2016
As someone who has rejected most, if not all, of my childhood religious indoctrination, I consistently find Anne Lamott's humor and insights on spirituality and the god figure/concept/delusion/confusion most delightful and enlightening. I love her writing and the turn of phrase that pokes holes straight through the doctrinaire and dogma while raising human frailty and its beauty to the level of the divine. How can a writer touch someone who is convinced he's an atheist so deeply with the kernel of spiritual truth? Perhaps because what shines through her writing, for me, is a celebration of the human condition and our central role in a (humanist) response to the greater unknown, whether she realizes it or not. In any case, she is a special writer who can turn a phrase and create a moment like few others can, and I adore re-reading her sentences and observations and excuses. She makes me smile and be glad that I share the planet with someone like her.
January 12, 2013
I have a few friends who don't like Anne Lamott. I am not among them. Here's why: she is brutally honest, unpretentious and doesn't pretend that she has it all together. In my opinion, this is exactly the kind of writer Christian publishers need to actively pursue. Far too many books in this genre are written from a perspective of superiority. They go something like this: if you want to learn to pray, do this because it worked for me. Or if you want to serve God, do this because it worked for me. Blah blah blah. I can't even read those books: they shame instead of encourage.
So it is refreshing to read Lamott's non-directive thoughts on prayer. She does not tell you what to do or how to pray. Instead, it's like she opens up her own prayers and allows you to bear witness to a conversation between God and one of his people. She doesn't imply you should say these same exact things to God or expect the same responses. What she does do is try to show you that whatever your heart is feeling, God can handle it. He will hear your pleas for help, He will give you moments worthy of thanks and you will hopefully be left with only wow.
I ended this book remembering that prayer does not have to be hard. (In fact, if it's hard I am probably not really praying.)
If you are looking for a book on how to pray, look elsewhere. If you are looking for a book of authentic prayer and honesty, read this. I ended it desirous of seeing the wow in my world and thankful for Lamott's unvarnished authenticity.
So it is refreshing to read Lamott's non-directive thoughts on prayer. She does not tell you what to do or how to pray. Instead, it's like she opens up her own prayers and allows you to bear witness to a conversation between God and one of his people. She doesn't imply you should say these same exact things to God or expect the same responses. What she does do is try to show you that whatever your heart is feeling, God can handle it. He will hear your pleas for help, He will give you moments worthy of thanks and you will hopefully be left with only wow.
I ended this book remembering that prayer does not have to be hard. (In fact, if it's hard I am probably not really praying.)
If you are looking for a book on how to pray, look elsewhere. If you are looking for a book of authentic prayer and honesty, read this. I ended it desirous of seeing the wow in my world and thankful for Lamott's unvarnished authenticity.
December 29, 2025
Lamott is witty and real when it comes to praying. To her it isn’t specifically looking outside oneself to find the answers needed…
But…An opportunity to reflect. Her 3 prayers are her title of the book.
And…When it comes to Prayer #1, “Help” she shares that it is simply…
“Help. Help us walk through this. Help us come through.”
Thus…Recognizing that we are not alone on this journey. Others can be available to support us when we need it, by simply asking for help.
Prayer #2 is “Thanks” which she uses…
“…To say in gratitude for any unexpected grace in my life.”
And…In one story she shared about her experience of being out in a car with two of her closest friends. She sat in the backseat, while her one friend drove. This was an opportunity to provide their friend, Barbara, (who sat in the front passenger seat) to be out in nature. Barbara was suffering from ALS and unable to eat, speak or walk without assistance, and wanted to be surrounded by nature with her best friends. Lamott asked Barbara…
“What are you most grateful for these days?”
Her friend’s response via electronic voice support…
“The beauty of nature, the birds and flowers, the beauty of friends.”
Lamott declared…
“This is called radical gratitude in the face of whatever life throws at you. I was so glad and so grateful to be there with them that day – euphoric.”
A simple act of friendship, brought joy to all present.
Again…Showcasing Prayer #2: Thanks.
And…Then there is Prayer #3. “Wow.” In this, Lamott shares that…
“Wow, is often offered with a gasp, a sharp intake of breath, when we can’t think of another way to capture the sight of shocking beauty or destruction, of a sudden unbidden insight or an unexpected flash of grace.”
It becomes…Simply…
Wow.
And…Wow is what got me most. I loved her simple musings about the power of Wow. How often do we think about it ourselves when we are out in nature and behold the beautiful sights before us?
Or…When someone shows a simple act of kindness, just because?
Lamott closes with “Amen.”
“Quiet, deep breath after any prayer…”
In this way she is…Reminding us that anything we ask for, or need, or want to thank others for, or being in the presence of something spectacular, can simply end with an “Amen.”
This book was a beautiful, self-reflection and sharing…
And…A quick 102 pages.
It was also…A sensible reminder of our human-ness and our sometimes need for quiet introspection and gratitude for this life we are in.
But…An opportunity to reflect. Her 3 prayers are her title of the book.
And…When it comes to Prayer #1, “Help” she shares that it is simply…
“Help. Help us walk through this. Help us come through.”
Thus…Recognizing that we are not alone on this journey. Others can be available to support us when we need it, by simply asking for help.
Prayer #2 is “Thanks” which she uses…
“…To say in gratitude for any unexpected grace in my life.”
And…In one story she shared about her experience of being out in a car with two of her closest friends. She sat in the backseat, while her one friend drove. This was an opportunity to provide their friend, Barbara, (who sat in the front passenger seat) to be out in nature. Barbara was suffering from ALS and unable to eat, speak or walk without assistance, and wanted to be surrounded by nature with her best friends. Lamott asked Barbara…
“What are you most grateful for these days?”
Her friend’s response via electronic voice support…
“The beauty of nature, the birds and flowers, the beauty of friends.”
Lamott declared…
“This is called radical gratitude in the face of whatever life throws at you. I was so glad and so grateful to be there with them that day – euphoric.”
A simple act of friendship, brought joy to all present.
Again…Showcasing Prayer #2: Thanks.
And…Then there is Prayer #3. “Wow.” In this, Lamott shares that…
“Wow, is often offered with a gasp, a sharp intake of breath, when we can’t think of another way to capture the sight of shocking beauty or destruction, of a sudden unbidden insight or an unexpected flash of grace.”
It becomes…Simply…
Wow.
And…Wow is what got me most. I loved her simple musings about the power of Wow. How often do we think about it ourselves when we are out in nature and behold the beautiful sights before us?
Or…When someone shows a simple act of kindness, just because?
Lamott closes with “Amen.”
“Quiet, deep breath after any prayer…”
In this way she is…Reminding us that anything we ask for, or need, or want to thank others for, or being in the presence of something spectacular, can simply end with an “Amen.”
This book was a beautiful, self-reflection and sharing…
And…A quick 102 pages.
It was also…A sensible reminder of our human-ness and our sometimes need for quiet introspection and gratitude for this life we are in.
December 4, 2013
"Let's not get bogged down on whom or what we pray to. let's just say prayer is a communication from our hearts to the great mystery, or Goodness, or Howard; to the animating energy of love we are sometimes bold enough to believe in; to something unimaginably big, and not us. we could call this force Not Me, and Not Preachers Onstage with a Choir of 800. or for convenience we could just say "God". A wonderful, quick read about real and imperfect faith in real and imperfect people. People whose faith sometimes means that they doubt God, question Him, and have to be completely broken and at the bottom to look up and find him at all. Anne Lamott makes her faith relatable and real as opposed to stuffy and traditional.
October 24, 2012
Loved it. But as I said to my sweet friend, Kim, who shares with me her advanced copies, I am predisposed towards loving Anne Lamott. It isn’t a very great way to review a book to compare it with another, but I did just finish One Thousand Gifts, which had some similar themes, and I just appreciate Anne Lamott’s style so much more than Ann Voskamp’s greeting card poetry. As my dad put it (regarding Lamott), she can really turn a phrase. I love her rambling, funny, down-to-earth, feel-it-all sensibility and this short, sweet reflection on how and why we pray.
January 2, 2013
I had to force myself to put this book down, spend some time thinking about what I'd read and pick it up again before I finished it. If you're a fan of Anne Lamott, you won't be disappointed. If you haven't read any of her other books before, I think this book would still be great, but I think it's so much better knowing some of her life stories before picking it up.
I set this aside for some time as I wanted to start out the year with this as my first book of the year, in the hopes of it helping to set the tone for the coming year(s). I'm sure I'll read it again.
I set this aside for some time as I wanted to start out the year with this as my first book of the year, in the hopes of it helping to set the tone for the coming year(s). I'm sure I'll read it again.
November 20, 2014
The older I get, the more I realize that I need something to have faith in. I find there’s really nothing like being raised Catholic for turning someone into an atheist, and for many years I indentified myself as one. In my 20s, I was content to say that I wasn’t scared of dying, convincing myself that I was living my life to the fullest, that when you gotta go, you just gotta go, and that nothing of me would be left after I was gone. Surely the day of my demise was so far off I needn’t worry about that for years & years & years, right? These days that philosophy just ain’t cuttin’ it.
I had a scary experience several months ago & a terrible dream a few months after that which convinced me deep down in my bones that, yes, I am actually going to stop being alive on this planet someday, which of course I’ve known since I was about five but now I feel like I Really Know. This end of Me is going to be something I will have absolutely no control over & what’s worse is that it just might happen in some stupid mundane way without leaving me the chance to tell my husband & son how much I love them & say all my convenient good-byes & so forth. Maybe I won’t end up getting stuck in a fence with no one else around when a wind begins to blow & traps me to where I can’t breathe or call for help (holy heck, that was such a vivid, awful dream), but at some point in the future, I will most likely think to myself fleetingly, “There you go, there’s the last stupid mistake you’re ever going to make,” and that’ll be that. And as much as I buck against the religious dogma that I was raised with, as much as I find the concept of a whole eternity somewhere as unpalatable as I find the thought of a complete End, I need something to give me hope. I need something that keeps me from staring in terror at the wall after bedtime, wondering if tomorrow is gonna be The Day, as in The Last (I swear that even though I was a goth in high school, I am not as terribly morbid a person as I’m making myself sound).
Ann Lamott says that you are allowed to pray whether you want to direct that prayer at some big God in the sky who shakes his fist at gay people & casual sex or not – in my case, that’d be a big not. In this book she speaks of the freedom that I am trying to give myself, to be an agnostic & still pray to someone out there, be it the Good, the Really Real that she references, or Life or Love or Phil or something completely different. I don’t really believe that there’s an eye in the sky that can’t be stopped & when I get to the promised land, I’m gonna shake that eye’s hand, as Isaac Brock would say, but I do think there’s got to be something more to just being Here today & Gone tomorrow. So I use a method very like this. I say Help. Help me to not hate my mom so much. Help me to be more patient with my son. Help me be nicer to people at work. Thanks for putting this man & this kid in my life. Thanks for our continuing good health. Thanks for the awesome nap I took this afternoon. Wow, our garden is doing ridiculously well this year. Wow, my friend bought me lunch yesterday. Wow, I make great pesto. Amen. I try to believe that these words go somewhere & someone hears them. If it turns out that I’m wrong, well, at least it gives me peace & helps me sleep better at night. This book took me less than an hour to read, but when I was done, I felt that same sense of peace & that’s just about the best feeling ever.
I had a scary experience several months ago & a terrible dream a few months after that which convinced me deep down in my bones that, yes, I am actually going to stop being alive on this planet someday, which of course I’ve known since I was about five but now I feel like I Really Know. This end of Me is going to be something I will have absolutely no control over & what’s worse is that it just might happen in some stupid mundane way without leaving me the chance to tell my husband & son how much I love them & say all my convenient good-byes & so forth. Maybe I won’t end up getting stuck in a fence with no one else around when a wind begins to blow & traps me to where I can’t breathe or call for help (holy heck, that was such a vivid, awful dream), but at some point in the future, I will most likely think to myself fleetingly, “There you go, there’s the last stupid mistake you’re ever going to make,” and that’ll be that. And as much as I buck against the religious dogma that I was raised with, as much as I find the concept of a whole eternity somewhere as unpalatable as I find the thought of a complete End, I need something to give me hope. I need something that keeps me from staring in terror at the wall after bedtime, wondering if tomorrow is gonna be The Day, as in The Last (I swear that even though I was a goth in high school, I am not as terribly morbid a person as I’m making myself sound).
Ann Lamott says that you are allowed to pray whether you want to direct that prayer at some big God in the sky who shakes his fist at gay people & casual sex or not – in my case, that’d be a big not. In this book she speaks of the freedom that I am trying to give myself, to be an agnostic & still pray to someone out there, be it the Good, the Really Real that she references, or Life or Love or Phil or something completely different. I don’t really believe that there’s an eye in the sky that can’t be stopped & when I get to the promised land, I’m gonna shake that eye’s hand, as Isaac Brock would say, but I do think there’s got to be something more to just being Here today & Gone tomorrow. So I use a method very like this. I say Help. Help me to not hate my mom so much. Help me to be more patient with my son. Help me be nicer to people at work. Thanks for putting this man & this kid in my life. Thanks for our continuing good health. Thanks for the awesome nap I took this afternoon. Wow, our garden is doing ridiculously well this year. Wow, my friend bought me lunch yesterday. Wow, I make great pesto. Amen. I try to believe that these words go somewhere & someone hears them. If it turns out that I’m wrong, well, at least it gives me peace & helps me sleep better at night. This book took me less than an hour to read, but when I was done, I felt that same sense of peace & that’s just about the best feeling ever.
January 7, 2013
I have read a lot of Anne Lamott and have always liked her hard-won spirituality, quirky worldview and writing style, her broadminded view of human nature - but this book didn't entirely do it for me, though I flagged some great quotes. It's awfully lite, that's my problem. And I have a quarrel with "THE Three Essential Prayers." If we're talking about essential prayers, then I would definitely put "Sorry" in there. I think contrition for our failings is part of the examined spiritual life (and I don't think I think this just because I was raised Catholic). Without "Sorry," spirituality can fall prey to self-satisfaction.
Quotes I liked:
If one person is praying for you, buckle up. Things can happen.
If you are paying attention, plenty is being revealed.
A nun I know once told me she kept begging God to take her character defects away from her. After years of this prayer, God finally got back to her: I'm not going to take anything away from you, you have to give it to me.
Love pulls people back to their feet.
Quotes I liked:
If one person is praying for you, buckle up. Things can happen.
If you are paying attention, plenty is being revealed.
A nun I know once told me she kept begging God to take her character defects away from her. After years of this prayer, God finally got back to her: I'm not going to take anything away from you, you have to give it to me.
Love pulls people back to their feet.
November 16, 2018
I highly recommend this small, but powerful, book, especially for anyone who is grappling with faith and belief in God.
With her usual candor, wit, and meaningful prose writing, Ms. Lamott explains how, in her words, all prayer can be summarized in 3 key words of expression to the Divine Other: Help! Thanks! and Wow!
I really enjoyed reading her reflections on prayer, on life, relationships, and social justice, and how our best praying enhances everything about our lives and our interactions with others and with our world while, at the same time, leads us deeper into the Mystery of the Divine One in whom our very being is found and sustained.
With her usual candor, wit, and meaningful prose writing, Ms. Lamott explains how, in her words, all prayer can be summarized in 3 key words of expression to the Divine Other: Help! Thanks! and Wow!
I really enjoyed reading her reflections on prayer, on life, relationships, and social justice, and how our best praying enhances everything about our lives and our interactions with others and with our world while, at the same time, leads us deeper into the Mystery of the Divine One in whom our very being is found and sustained.
April 20, 2013
I don't always agree with Lamott's views but I do enjoy her self-deprecating humor and I appreciate her honesty and humility as she writes about her personal journey of faith. The style in this book is a little rambling but there are nuggets of wisdom. At around 100 pages, it would make a nice little gift book for someone experiencing personal struggles.
However, If you've never read Lamott, I suggest starting with Traveling Mercies.
However, If you've never read Lamott, I suggest starting with Traveling Mercies.
February 14, 2013
This book kinda reads like a first draft. Like a good idea Anne had. So maybe she started writing wise snippets. Really rich little nuggets. And put them in her snippet jar. After a while, it would look like a fruit salad of paper. All different colors, and different folds.
Then one day she emptied out her snippet jar, and voila! Because she is who she is, she got to type it all up and have it published.
It's not really very cohesive.
But that's okay, because still... it's Anne Lamott. It's a short, rich little nugget. So if I ever need to deal with unpleasant things floating through my thoughts, I can take a quick nip of Help. Thanks. Wow.
Some of my favorites:
"Prayer is communication from the heart to that which surpasses understanding." p.1
"Prayer means that, in some unique way, we believe we're invited into a relationship with someone who hears us when we speak in silence." p.4
"Prayer is taking a chance that against all odds and past history, we are loved and chosen, and do not have to get it together before we show up." p.6
Help
"I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, with no proof, that my grandfather prayed for all of us kids. And as it turns out, if one person is praying for you, buckle up. Things can happen." p.19
'I slept and dreamt that life was joy.
I awoke and saw that life was service.
I acted and behold, service was joy.' - Rabindranath Tagore
Thanks
"In the face of everything, we slowly come through. We manage to make new constructs and baskets to hold what remains, and what has newly appeared. We come to know - or reconnect with - something rich and okay about ourselves. And at some point, we cast our eyes to the beautiful skies, above all the crap we're wallowing in, and we whisper, 'Thank you.'" p.51
"Revelation is not for the faint of heart. Some of us with tiny paranoia issues think that so much information and understanding is being withheld from us - by colleagues, by family, by life, by God - knowledge that would save us, and help us break the code and enable us to experience life with peace and amusement. But in our quieter moments we remember that (a) there are no codes, and (b) if you are paying attention, plenty is being revealed. We are too often distracted by the need to burnish our surfaces, to look good so that other people won't know what screwed-up messes we are, or our mate or kids or finances, are. But if you gently help yourself back to the present moment, you see how life keeps stumbling along and how you may actually find your way through another ordinary or impossible day. Details are being revealed, and they will take you out of yourself, which is heaven, and you will have a story to tell, which is salvation that again and again saves us, the way Jesus saves some people, or the way sobriety does. Stories to tell or hear - either way, it's medicine. The Word." p.52-53
"The marvel is only partly that somehow you lured them into your web twenty years ago, forty years ago, and they totally stuck with you. The more astonishing thing is that these greatest of all possible people feel the same way about you - horrible, grim, self-obsessed you. They say - or maybe I said - that a good marriage is one is which each spouse secretly thinks he or she got the better deal, and this is true also of our bosom friendships. You could almost flush with appreciation. What a great scam, to have gotten people of such extreme quality and loyalty to think you are stuck with them. Oh my God. Thank you." p.57-58
"A nun I know once told me she kept begging God to take her character defects away from her. After years of this prayer, God finally got back to her: 'I'm not going to take anything away from you, you have to give it to Me.'" p.63
Wow
"I said 'God' at my own house when a family friend, a man of eighty, recited Eliot's 'The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock' one drunken evening with twenty old friends gathered around. That tableau is like a thumbprint on my heart." p.77
"In museums, when we behold framed greatness, genius embracing passion, obsession, discipline, and possibly madness, our mouths drop open. For a short time, we see past all that is jumbled, mysterious, marvelous, and ugly. Instead, we glimpse life, beauty, grief, or evil, love captured and truth held up to the light. Art makes it hard to ignore truth, that Life explodes and blooms, consumes, rots and radiates and slithers, that eternity really is in a blade of grass." p.82-83
Amen
"I pray not to be such a whiny, self-obsessed baby, and give thanks that I am not quite as bad as I used to be (talk about miracles). Then something comes up, and I overreact and blame and sulk, and it feels like I haven't made any progress at all. But it turns out I'm less of a brat than before, and I hit the reset button much sooner, shake it off and get my sense of humor back. That we and those we love have lightened up over the years is one of the most astonishing sights we will ever witness." p.95-96
"To have prayed to know God's care first-hand, without mediation, and to give thanks for the gift. To know that God's maternal hands hold one's life, like a baby." p.98-99
And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.
-Raymond Carver
I pray because I can't help myself. I pray because I'm helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time, waking and sleeping. It doesn't change God. It changes me. -C.S. Lewis
"Prayer brings me back to my heart, from the treacherous swamp of my mind. It brings me back to the now." p.100
"You've heard it said that when all else fails, follow instructions. So we breathe, try to slow down and pay attention, try to love and help God's other children, and-hardest of all, at least to me-learn to love our depressing, hilarious, mostly decent selves. We get thirsty people water, read to the very young and old, and listen to the sad. We pick up litter and try to leave the world a slightly better place for our stay here." p. 101
Then one day she emptied out her snippet jar, and voila! Because she is who she is, she got to type it all up and have it published.
It's not really very cohesive.
But that's okay, because still... it's Anne Lamott. It's a short, rich little nugget. So if I ever need to deal with unpleasant things floating through my thoughts, I can take a quick nip of Help. Thanks. Wow.
Some of my favorites:
"Prayer is communication from the heart to that which surpasses understanding." p.1
"Prayer means that, in some unique way, we believe we're invited into a relationship with someone who hears us when we speak in silence." p.4
"Prayer is taking a chance that against all odds and past history, we are loved and chosen, and do not have to get it together before we show up." p.6
Help
"I know beyond a shadow of a doubt, with no proof, that my grandfather prayed for all of us kids. And as it turns out, if one person is praying for you, buckle up. Things can happen." p.19
'I slept and dreamt that life was joy.
I awoke and saw that life was service.
I acted and behold, service was joy.' - Rabindranath Tagore
Thanks
"In the face of everything, we slowly come through. We manage to make new constructs and baskets to hold what remains, and what has newly appeared. We come to know - or reconnect with - something rich and okay about ourselves. And at some point, we cast our eyes to the beautiful skies, above all the crap we're wallowing in, and we whisper, 'Thank you.'" p.51
"Revelation is not for the faint of heart. Some of us with tiny paranoia issues think that so much information and understanding is being withheld from us - by colleagues, by family, by life, by God - knowledge that would save us, and help us break the code and enable us to experience life with peace and amusement. But in our quieter moments we remember that (a) there are no codes, and (b) if you are paying attention, plenty is being revealed. We are too often distracted by the need to burnish our surfaces, to look good so that other people won't know what screwed-up messes we are, or our mate or kids or finances, are. But if you gently help yourself back to the present moment, you see how life keeps stumbling along and how you may actually find your way through another ordinary or impossible day. Details are being revealed, and they will take you out of yourself, which is heaven, and you will have a story to tell, which is salvation that again and again saves us, the way Jesus saves some people, or the way sobriety does. Stories to tell or hear - either way, it's medicine. The Word." p.52-53
"The marvel is only partly that somehow you lured them into your web twenty years ago, forty years ago, and they totally stuck with you. The more astonishing thing is that these greatest of all possible people feel the same way about you - horrible, grim, self-obsessed you. They say - or maybe I said - that a good marriage is one is which each spouse secretly thinks he or she got the better deal, and this is true also of our bosom friendships. You could almost flush with appreciation. What a great scam, to have gotten people of such extreme quality and loyalty to think you are stuck with them. Oh my God. Thank you." p.57-58
"A nun I know once told me she kept begging God to take her character defects away from her. After years of this prayer, God finally got back to her: 'I'm not going to take anything away from you, you have to give it to Me.'" p.63
Wow
"I said 'God' at my own house when a family friend, a man of eighty, recited Eliot's 'The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock' one drunken evening with twenty old friends gathered around. That tableau is like a thumbprint on my heart." p.77
"In museums, when we behold framed greatness, genius embracing passion, obsession, discipline, and possibly madness, our mouths drop open. For a short time, we see past all that is jumbled, mysterious, marvelous, and ugly. Instead, we glimpse life, beauty, grief, or evil, love captured and truth held up to the light. Art makes it hard to ignore truth, that Life explodes and blooms, consumes, rots and radiates and slithers, that eternity really is in a blade of grass." p.82-83
Amen
"I pray not to be such a whiny, self-obsessed baby, and give thanks that I am not quite as bad as I used to be (talk about miracles). Then something comes up, and I overreact and blame and sulk, and it feels like I haven't made any progress at all. But it turns out I'm less of a brat than before, and I hit the reset button much sooner, shake it off and get my sense of humor back. That we and those we love have lightened up over the years is one of the most astonishing sights we will ever witness." p.95-96
"To have prayed to know God's care first-hand, without mediation, and to give thanks for the gift. To know that God's maternal hands hold one's life, like a baby." p.98-99
And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
I did.
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.
-Raymond Carver
I pray because I can't help myself. I pray because I'm helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time, waking and sleeping. It doesn't change God. It changes me. -C.S. Lewis
"Prayer brings me back to my heart, from the treacherous swamp of my mind. It brings me back to the now." p.100
"You've heard it said that when all else fails, follow instructions. So we breathe, try to slow down and pay attention, try to love and help God's other children, and-hardest of all, at least to me-learn to love our depressing, hilarious, mostly decent selves. We get thirsty people water, read to the very young and old, and listen to the sad. We pick up litter and try to leave the world a slightly better place for our stay here." p. 101
April 13, 2024
I listened to this short book on Audible as I walked in the spring sunshine. Narrated by the author herself, it is characteristic of her warm and humorous style. Pragmatic but whimsical, self-deprecating but wise.
I made two notes for myself - so I am going to include them here.
“The three things that I cannot change: the past, the truth and you.”
“How do you know if spiritual experience has changed your behaviour: Have you become more generous, which is the ultimate healing? Or more patient, which is a close second?”
Anne Lamott has been a “touchstone” writer for me since I was in my early 20s. I prefer her nonfiction to her fiction - I think that is her true metier - but I would happily read anything she writes.
I made two notes for myself - so I am going to include them here.
“The three things that I cannot change: the past, the truth and you.”
“How do you know if spiritual experience has changed your behaviour: Have you become more generous, which is the ultimate healing? Or more patient, which is a close second?”
Anne Lamott has been a “touchstone” writer for me since I was in my early 20s. I prefer her nonfiction to her fiction - I think that is her true metier - but I would happily read anything she writes.
December 22, 2012
When you read thin books, you always hope that they are succinct as hell -- big books that have been cut to the bone, trimmed to the essence, winnowed to their winning ways. You certainly entertain no thoughts of repetitiveness. That's forgivable with Dickens, Thackery, and Fielding. They write huge tomes that leave room for error. But the 100-page book? No.
That's my main beef with Anne Lamott's long essay on prayer. I read a NY Times essay of hers that I enjoyed mightily. It told how her family was anything-but religious, how they worshipped at the altar of great writers and lived a Bohemian lifestyle. Lamott cut against the family grain. She got religion -- of a sort. But, in writing about it, she travels six ways to Sunday but I keep seeing the same four-way intersection.
I should have been the perfect audience for this book, which is why I bought it. I am irreligious, yet spiritual; agnostic, yet defensive about God; skeptical, yet trusting in the great unknown. Lamott is similar. She has no patience for Christians who claim to know "the way" because, of course, they don't. Hers is a most laid-back and understanding God. He (sometimes She) doesn't mind if you say, "God, you've pissed me off this time." Eh. This is what happens when you're in the business of creating humans. Frankenstein's monsters, and all that.
But the three sections -- prayers for HELP, prayers of THANKS, and prayers of WOW -- were a bit circular and the writing a bit meandering. I wanted a more poetic precision from this. The smaller the genre and the smaller the size, the greater the demands. Plus Lamott is the writers' writer. Did she not write Bird by Bird, the Gospel of Wannabe Writers everywhere?
OK. Yes, there are some neat moments, like this paragraph on the WOW of autumn:
"And autumn ain't so shabby for Wow, either. The colors are broccoli and flame and fox fur. The tang is apples, death, and wood smoke. The rot smells faintly of grapes, of fermentation, of one element being changed alchemically into another, and the air is moist and you sleep under two down comforters in a cold room. The trails are not dusty anymore, and you get to wear your favorite sweaters."
But overall, I got a "Meh" kind of feeling, like the book needed help, like I owed it little thanks, and like I'd been gypped out of $17.95 (wow!) for 102 pages.
Welcome to the hazards of reading new books, pilgrim.
That's my main beef with Anne Lamott's long essay on prayer. I read a NY Times essay of hers that I enjoyed mightily. It told how her family was anything-but religious, how they worshipped at the altar of great writers and lived a Bohemian lifestyle. Lamott cut against the family grain. She got religion -- of a sort. But, in writing about it, she travels six ways to Sunday but I keep seeing the same four-way intersection.
I should have been the perfect audience for this book, which is why I bought it. I am irreligious, yet spiritual; agnostic, yet defensive about God; skeptical, yet trusting in the great unknown. Lamott is similar. She has no patience for Christians who claim to know "the way" because, of course, they don't. Hers is a most laid-back and understanding God. He (sometimes She) doesn't mind if you say, "God, you've pissed me off this time." Eh. This is what happens when you're in the business of creating humans. Frankenstein's monsters, and all that.
But the three sections -- prayers for HELP, prayers of THANKS, and prayers of WOW -- were a bit circular and the writing a bit meandering. I wanted a more poetic precision from this. The smaller the genre and the smaller the size, the greater the demands. Plus Lamott is the writers' writer. Did she not write Bird by Bird, the Gospel of Wannabe Writers everywhere?
OK. Yes, there are some neat moments, like this paragraph on the WOW of autumn:
"And autumn ain't so shabby for Wow, either. The colors are broccoli and flame and fox fur. The tang is apples, death, and wood smoke. The rot smells faintly of grapes, of fermentation, of one element being changed alchemically into another, and the air is moist and you sleep under two down comforters in a cold room. The trails are not dusty anymore, and you get to wear your favorite sweaters."
But overall, I got a "Meh" kind of feeling, like the book needed help, like I owed it little thanks, and like I'd been gypped out of $17.95 (wow!) for 102 pages.
Welcome to the hazards of reading new books, pilgrim.
January 7, 2013
I think a lot of readers of this book will have the same initial feeling I did once I held it in my hands, which is "...Oh." This is a slim volume, a little pocket book, and I felt a little misled at first--a New Anne Lamott (nonfiction) Book is a big deal in my world, and I'd been looking forward to it for a long time. And here it was, clocking in at just over 100 pages? Hello? A booklet? What?
Annie (as I refer to her in my diary) is my most cherished author for a number of reasons. I first read Traveling Mercies when I was in my late teens, hopelessly devoted to Jesus (but not Christianity), a still often-anxious and "too sensitive" kid, terrified of turning twenty. And I was a writer. When I read Annie's essays, my heart recognized her. The book made me feel less afraid, more okay. It made me laugh. It reminded me to pay attention. And it taught me how to best tell stories.
Fast forward! It's 2013, somehow! I'm almost 30! I can't subscribe to actual literal Jesus anymore but I want to believe in God again so much that I think it counts as actually believing! And I'm holding Annie Lamott's new tiny book in my hand and I'm thinking "Oh. Well. Huh."
And then I read it. And I felt less afraid, and I felt more okay.
This isn't a collection of essays, necessarily. It's a book about prayer. It's a book about prayer meant for anyone. It's a primer in believing. It will help you believe. It appeared in my hands the same way Traveling Mercies did, at exactly the right moment. This isn't Annie trying to get away with something; it's Annie knowing her subject better than ever before. It's 112 pages, but 112 pages of what I can only describe as wisdom. It's Annie, distilled.
Annie (as I refer to her in my diary) is my most cherished author for a number of reasons. I first read Traveling Mercies when I was in my late teens, hopelessly devoted to Jesus (but not Christianity), a still often-anxious and "too sensitive" kid, terrified of turning twenty. And I was a writer. When I read Annie's essays, my heart recognized her. The book made me feel less afraid, more okay. It made me laugh. It reminded me to pay attention. And it taught me how to best tell stories.
Fast forward! It's 2013, somehow! I'm almost 30! I can't subscribe to actual literal Jesus anymore but I want to believe in God again so much that I think it counts as actually believing! And I'm holding Annie Lamott's new tiny book in my hand and I'm thinking "Oh. Well. Huh."
And then I read it. And I felt less afraid, and I felt more okay.
This isn't a collection of essays, necessarily. It's a book about prayer. It's a book about prayer meant for anyone. It's a primer in believing. It will help you believe. It appeared in my hands the same way Traveling Mercies did, at exactly the right moment. This isn't Annie trying to get away with something; it's Annie knowing her subject better than ever before. It's 112 pages, but 112 pages of what I can only describe as wisdom. It's Annie, distilled.
December 27, 2012
Lamont is the kind of person I would want as a friend: real, honest, funny, sincere, intelligent, kind, tough, and delightfully imperfect. Her book is filled with gems of stories and beautiful descriptions. On page 11 she calls herself a "crabby optimist." I love that paradox and can relate. My favorite prayer was on page 67 when she was experiencing frustration and disappointment. She prayed, "'Help me not be such an ass.' (This is actually the fourth great prayer...)." More of us, including myself, need to say that prayer.
One of my favorite descriptions was in the Wow chapter, page 88. "So you eat one berry slowly savoring the sweetness and slight resistance, and after sucking the purple juice off your fingers you say: Wow. That tasted like a very hot summer afternoon when I was about seven and walked barefoot down the dirt road to pick them off the wild blackberry bushes out by the goats. Pedro and Easter, in the McKegneys' field. Wow. The blackberries tasted like sweet purple nectar, not dusty exactly, but dusted just right, not quite leafy but still alive, a little bitter around the seed, juicy and warm with sunshine."
One of my favorite descriptions was in the Wow chapter, page 88. "So you eat one berry slowly savoring the sweetness and slight resistance, and after sucking the purple juice off your fingers you say: Wow. That tasted like a very hot summer afternoon when I was about seven and walked barefoot down the dirt road to pick them off the wild blackberry bushes out by the goats. Pedro and Easter, in the McKegneys' field. Wow. The blackberries tasted like sweet purple nectar, not dusty exactly, but dusted just right, not quite leafy but still alive, a little bitter around the seed, juicy and warm with sunshine."
January 15, 2016
First of all, it needs to be said that if you are an evangelical type believer, you will probably not like this book. It it very very much Prayer 101 or "Christianity lite", if you can even call it that; it definitely has a more secular feel. This book basically gives Anne's viewpoint of how she feels prayer works, with three different simple prayers. Although she tries to make prayer sound more "normal" for the unchurched and encourages people to pray in their own way, she still makes God sound too unapproachable by using commonalities such as "the Force", "Something" and "higher power." She even refers to God as a "Her." (Pg 25) and there is a general irreverence, although for her, she is probably writing to her regular readers. On chapters "Thanks" and "Wow", it really comes across as a book on gratitude, more than prayer. She offers a few great memorable quotes here and there, but there wasn't enough for me too grasp ahold of, even though I did read the entire book.
She gives credit to her church and pastor at the end of the book, but in the introduction she probably should have been more clear that this book was a result of the current journey that she is on, and she is giving her own opinions. The reason that I say this is because there is no talk about God's grace or His love and how much He wants a relationship with us. Explaining the "help" prayers, you feel as though these "when you need them" prayers are a one-sided conversation, followed with a humanistic conclusion as to why the prayer was "answered" as it was. There is so much more to prayer than this! But again, this is Anne's summary of how prayer works, and it is probably her way of encouraging others to take another look at God and prayer if they haven't before. And I can't say that is bad, but it doesn't give readers any hope that there can really be more. I appreciated her positive look on life, and how to be more grateful and responsive to the wonders of life.
I just hope Anne continues on her journey and learns more about what God can really offer instead of staying on this simplistic plateau of impersonality towards prayer While this is an attempt at a "spiritual" book, it is not one on faith. I think she should stay with her fiction.
She gives credit to her church and pastor at the end of the book, but in the introduction she probably should have been more clear that this book was a result of the current journey that she is on, and she is giving her own opinions. The reason that I say this is because there is no talk about God's grace or His love and how much He wants a relationship with us. Explaining the "help" prayers, you feel as though these "when you need them" prayers are a one-sided conversation, followed with a humanistic conclusion as to why the prayer was "answered" as it was. There is so much more to prayer than this! But again, this is Anne's summary of how prayer works, and it is probably her way of encouraging others to take another look at God and prayer if they haven't before. And I can't say that is bad, but it doesn't give readers any hope that there can really be more. I appreciated her positive look on life, and how to be more grateful and responsive to the wonders of life.
I just hope Anne continues on her journey and learns more about what God can really offer instead of staying on this simplistic plateau of impersonality towards prayer While this is an attempt at a "spiritual" book, it is not one on faith. I think she should stay with her fiction.
February 7, 2013
Well, since she called these "prayers" I assumed she meant praying to God. However, her definition of "god" was just about any one or any thing you want to call "it". I am astounded by the people who don't believe in God, but "pray" to something. Why? What good will it do? It's the same thing as saying "I'll have good thoughts for you". Can anyone tell me EXACTLY WHAT that means and what good it does? Sheesh.
July 26, 2014
Inspirational essays on prayers and praying.
Help! Thanks! Wow! and Amen! Simplified to these one word types in general. Sometimes the simple is best.
All four categories from our human viewpoint. Words focused upon and to our ideas of God and how it helps to converse. Lovely, gentle and peaceful real life examples here of the author's and friends' prayers used in common human times of change, unsure direction and just perplexity in being ourselves amidst both failure and success.
Help! Thanks! Wow! and Amen! Simplified to these one word types in general. Sometimes the simple is best.
All four categories from our human viewpoint. Words focused upon and to our ideas of God and how it helps to converse. Lovely, gentle and peaceful real life examples here of the author's and friends' prayers used in common human times of change, unsure direction and just perplexity in being ourselves amidst both failure and success.
November 14, 2012
Do you like Anne Lamott's writing? I do, I've read every single thing she's ever written. She is probably the greatest influence on what and how I write; she gives voice to her petty struggling self and I try to do that too, because I secretly know that even you are petty, though no one would ever know that about you, so you are stuck all alone knowing that unless other people 'fess up. I love that about her. When I've been unable to read, at various times in my life, I've always found my way back to reading, and to life, through her books. I've read everything she's ever written, and if you like her too, friend her on facebook for a near-daily dose of her generous spirit and liberal-hearted view of the world.
Last night I read her new book, Help Thanks Wow. I'd pre-ordered it months ago for my kindle, and poof! There it was, late last night, just in time. I was lying awake, struggling in the dark, and decided that her words could probably help. I read the whole thing in an hour or so, it's a short (4 chapter) book. It's a pointedly spiritual book (all hers are, of course, but this one is especially so) focusing on the three prayers she says. Those are my prayers too; you could of course argue that all prayers come down to those three topics, and you'd be right, but those are exactly the prayers I say. In this regard, I am a wordy minimalist. Help. Thanks. WOW. Occasionally my help prayers take the pleading form: pleasepleasepleaseplease.
Helphelphelp (my dear daughter in her grief, my suffering husband in his pain, me in my grief and pain and suffering). Thankyouthankyouthankyou (for strength and courage and love and friendship and all that surrounds me right now, and always). Wow. Just, wow. Pain and love, all at once. Wow. Amen.
It's a lovely book, even though it's short and I wish there were more of it. It's a great addition to my Anne Lamott shelf, and a book I'm sure I'll read again and again. Thanks Anne, again.
Last night I read her new book, Help Thanks Wow. I'd pre-ordered it months ago for my kindle, and poof! There it was, late last night, just in time. I was lying awake, struggling in the dark, and decided that her words could probably help. I read the whole thing in an hour or so, it's a short (4 chapter) book. It's a pointedly spiritual book (all hers are, of course, but this one is especially so) focusing on the three prayers she says. Those are my prayers too; you could of course argue that all prayers come down to those three topics, and you'd be right, but those are exactly the prayers I say. In this regard, I am a wordy minimalist. Help. Thanks. WOW. Occasionally my help prayers take the pleading form: pleasepleasepleaseplease.
Helphelphelp (my dear daughter in her grief, my suffering husband in his pain, me in my grief and pain and suffering). Thankyouthankyouthankyou (for strength and courage and love and friendship and all that surrounds me right now, and always). Wow. Just, wow. Pain and love, all at once. Wow. Amen.
It's a lovely book, even though it's short and I wish there were more of it. It's a great addition to my Anne Lamott shelf, and a book I'm sure I'll read again and again. Thanks Anne, again.
December 29, 2012
Just using this spot as a place to keep some quotes.
"I have seen many people survive unsurvivable losses, and seen them experience happiness again. How is this possible? Love flowed to them from their closest people, and from their community, surrounded them, sat with them, held them, fed them, swept their floors. Time passed. In most cases, their pain evolved slowly into help for others." (23)
"They say--or maybe I said--that a good marriage is one in which each spouse secretly thinks he or she got the better deal, and this is true also of our bosom friendships. You could almost flush with appreciation. What a great scam, to have gotten people of such extreme quality and loyalty to think you are stuck with them. Oh my god. Thank you." (57-58)
"'Help me not be such an ass.' (This is actually the fourth great prayer . . . )" (67)
Quoting Matisse: "I don't know whether I believe in God or not. I think, really, I'm some sort of Buddhist. But the essential thing is to put oneself in a frame of mind which is close to that of prayer." (93-94)
"I have seen many people survive unsurvivable losses, and seen them experience happiness again. How is this possible? Love flowed to them from their closest people, and from their community, surrounded them, sat with them, held them, fed them, swept their floors. Time passed. In most cases, their pain evolved slowly into help for others." (23)
"They say--or maybe I said--that a good marriage is one in which each spouse secretly thinks he or she got the better deal, and this is true also of our bosom friendships. You could almost flush with appreciation. What a great scam, to have gotten people of such extreme quality and loyalty to think you are stuck with them. Oh my god. Thank you." (57-58)
"'Help me not be such an ass.' (This is actually the fourth great prayer . . . )" (67)
Quoting Matisse: "I don't know whether I believe in God or not. I think, really, I'm some sort of Buddhist. But the essential thing is to put oneself in a frame of mind which is close to that of prayer." (93-94)
November 8, 2012
I'm so thankful for this book. Prayer is a concept I struggle with greatly and this has been one of the best reflections on the subject that I have encountered in a long time. It's not a theological treatise but is, instead, a personal reflection on surrender and searching.
I don't share Lamott's more optimistic approach on things and that is all the more reason why this is such an important read for me.
I don't share Lamott's more optimistic approach on things and that is all the more reason why this is such an important read for me.
May 21, 2013
Great book...very short, simple, and amazing ! Want to read it again...and again...to remind me how blessed I am !
February 5, 2013
Anne Lamott definitely stretches the boundaries of Christian writing. For that, we can thank her. Yes, she swears, says honest and unkind things (usually about herself), sometimes refers to God as Phil, and even lets slip a longing for her earlier, non-Christian lifestyle.
In her most recent book, "Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers," Lamott takes her earthly approach to the most holy of acts, prayer. In this short work, she talks about each of the three prayers and ends with some thoughts on "Amen."
She notes at the outset that "Prayer is taking a chance that against all odds and past history, we are loved and chosen, and do not have to get it together before we show up." If other prayer books make you feel wholly inadequate to seek communion with God, Lamott will get you shouting at God without guilt. "God can handle honesty, and prayer begins as an honest conversation."
Of the three prayers, her section on "Help" is the strongest. Although a short book, this could even be shortened more as the multiple of examples for one type of prayer can become tiresome. And Lamott always has a tendency to want to show people how cool she is -- she tires too hard, since her unique approach to life is clear. But perhaps she has used "Help" more than other prayers, so her words hit the mark with assurance.
Calling it "the first great prayer," she says in praying for help we find "There's freedom in hitting bottom, in seeing that you won't be able to save or rescue your daughter, her spouse, his parents, or your career, relief in admitting you've reached the place of great unknowing."
The theme that runs clearly through all of Lamott's writing, is the power of grace. She does not get why God would forgive her, but she is forgiven, so she accepts it. But grace does not create some sudden understanding of God, or a clear answer to our prayers in the way we want them. "Grace can be the experience of a second wind, when even though what you want is clarity and resolution, what you get is stamina and poignancy and the strength to hang on. Through the most ordinary things...life is transformed."
Lamott appropriately follow up the section on "Help" with the prayer of "Thanks." More than a prayer, Lamott seeks for us to live a life of gratitude. This has the danger of sliding into banal platitudes, but Lamott refuses to lose that essential, theological language. "Thanks" is not simply what we say to God, but is seen in our actions as well. And it needs, she argues, to be a habit.
The final prayer, "Wow," is not so much about words as our reaction to the divine. "Wow, is often offered with a gasp, a sharp intake of breath, when we can't think of another way to capture the sight of shocking beauty or destruction, of a sudden unbidden insight or an unexpected flash of grace." Such reactions are not limited to beautiful sunsets, but can be found in art galleries and at the sight of a natural disaster. It is the sense of awe which becomes increasingly difficult to grasp as the world manufactures more ways to confuse our senses. But sooner or later, and they are not rare events, we come to face the awe-inspiring, and we say "wow."
Lamott, in her usual style, has taken a challenging topic and made it very accessible. The reader will finish feeling good about their prayer life, even if it is nonexistent. And then they will feel like they can pray if they want to. In fact, as Lamott's simple prayers show, we may be praying without even knowing it.
Article first published as Book Review: Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers by Anne Lamott on Blogcritics.
In her most recent book, "Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers," Lamott takes her earthly approach to the most holy of acts, prayer. In this short work, she talks about each of the three prayers and ends with some thoughts on "Amen."
She notes at the outset that "Prayer is taking a chance that against all odds and past history, we are loved and chosen, and do not have to get it together before we show up." If other prayer books make you feel wholly inadequate to seek communion with God, Lamott will get you shouting at God without guilt. "God can handle honesty, and prayer begins as an honest conversation."
Of the three prayers, her section on "Help" is the strongest. Although a short book, this could even be shortened more as the multiple of examples for one type of prayer can become tiresome. And Lamott always has a tendency to want to show people how cool she is -- she tires too hard, since her unique approach to life is clear. But perhaps she has used "Help" more than other prayers, so her words hit the mark with assurance.
Calling it "the first great prayer," she says in praying for help we find "There's freedom in hitting bottom, in seeing that you won't be able to save or rescue your daughter, her spouse, his parents, or your career, relief in admitting you've reached the place of great unknowing."
The theme that runs clearly through all of Lamott's writing, is the power of grace. She does not get why God would forgive her, but she is forgiven, so she accepts it. But grace does not create some sudden understanding of God, or a clear answer to our prayers in the way we want them. "Grace can be the experience of a second wind, when even though what you want is clarity and resolution, what you get is stamina and poignancy and the strength to hang on. Through the most ordinary things...life is transformed."
Lamott appropriately follow up the section on "Help" with the prayer of "Thanks." More than a prayer, Lamott seeks for us to live a life of gratitude. This has the danger of sliding into banal platitudes, but Lamott refuses to lose that essential, theological language. "Thanks" is not simply what we say to God, but is seen in our actions as well. And it needs, she argues, to be a habit.
The final prayer, "Wow," is not so much about words as our reaction to the divine. "Wow, is often offered with a gasp, a sharp intake of breath, when we can't think of another way to capture the sight of shocking beauty or destruction, of a sudden unbidden insight or an unexpected flash of grace." Such reactions are not limited to beautiful sunsets, but can be found in art galleries and at the sight of a natural disaster. It is the sense of awe which becomes increasingly difficult to grasp as the world manufactures more ways to confuse our senses. But sooner or later, and they are not rare events, we come to face the awe-inspiring, and we say "wow."
Lamott, in her usual style, has taken a challenging topic and made it very accessible. The reader will finish feeling good about their prayer life, even if it is nonexistent. And then they will feel like they can pray if they want to. In fact, as Lamott's simple prayers show, we may be praying without even knowing it.
Article first published as Book Review: Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers by Anne Lamott on Blogcritics.
December 31, 2012
I have truly enjoyed reading anything written by Anne Lamott. I first became interested in reading Ms. Lamott when I read her quote: "You can safely assume that you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do." Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers, like her other works, resonates with my spirit. This is a quick read, and I will need to read it again! As I was reading, I felt the resonance of Ms. Lamott's words, thoughts, themes and the like. I felt in-tune with the world, spirit, God... These three essential prayers: Help, Thanks, and Wow really do serve to remind us that prayer is interactive, prayer does not need to be complicated, and prayer can be the time that deep speaks to deep, and deep listens to deep.
Ms. Lamott's illustrative anecdotes are familiar and meaningful. Look for her story of 'Mason's song.' As I read this piece, I was most certainly moved beyond where I was to experience Help, Thanks, and Wow all at the same time! Amen! I recommend reading Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers wholeheartedly and hope that it resonates with your spirit the way that it has with mine.
Ms. Lamott's illustrative anecdotes are familiar and meaningful. Look for her story of 'Mason's song.' As I read this piece, I was most certainly moved beyond where I was to experience Help, Thanks, and Wow all at the same time! Amen! I recommend reading Help, Thanks, Wow: The Three Essential Prayers wholeheartedly and hope that it resonates with your spirit the way that it has with mine.
November 10, 2013
ugh. I didn't even make it 4 pages into this. No way I could finish it. I suppose a lot of people would love it, but I can't read something that tells me to call God whatever I want- Howard, Phil, or She. It just goes against everything I believe. No offense intended to anyone else.
March 31, 2013
I don't know if Anne Lamott is a Christian, certainly nothing in this book indicates that she is. In the first couple of pages she allows that the reader's "God" may be one of any number of possible ideas, and the rest of the book follows that direction. As such, some of the good and wise perspective she has on prayer is neutered by a complete lack of any sort of concrete idea of just who we are praying to.
I recognize that this is likely intended to make it accessible to those who do not have a terribly close relationship with God in the first place, which is, after all, a great place to start learning about prayer. Certainly no one needs to have a masters in theology to know how to pray. But by making this "God" idea so vague in the book, we get no insight into the character of God (he is real, after all, or we would not be praying to him), or the promises of God, or the heart of God. We do not get a single Bible reference that reminds us that God actually wants us to pray and ask for help and give thanks and praise him.
The only saving grace of this book (which really is more suited to be called a pamphlet) is that the author is unusually real. She is quick to admit her flaws and insecurities, which is vital to the process of prayer. Her openness makes us feel more comfortable with our own real selves, and that's something sorely lacking in many books of this sort.
Still, there is nothing here that I could recommend to anyone. Much better is "A Praying Life" by Paul Miller.
I recognize that this is likely intended to make it accessible to those who do not have a terribly close relationship with God in the first place, which is, after all, a great place to start learning about prayer. Certainly no one needs to have a masters in theology to know how to pray. But by making this "God" idea so vague in the book, we get no insight into the character of God (he is real, after all, or we would not be praying to him), or the promises of God, or the heart of God. We do not get a single Bible reference that reminds us that God actually wants us to pray and ask for help and give thanks and praise him.
The only saving grace of this book (which really is more suited to be called a pamphlet) is that the author is unusually real. She is quick to admit her flaws and insecurities, which is vital to the process of prayer. Her openness makes us feel more comfortable with our own real selves, and that's something sorely lacking in many books of this sort.
Still, there is nothing here that I could recommend to anyone. Much better is "A Praying Life" by Paul Miller.
August 8, 2023
"It is us, the damaged, hopeless people, lifting up our hope, hate, gratitude, fear, and shame, saying, Boy, do we hope we are right about this God stuff."
It's been a while since I read anything by Lamott, and it is always something that hits your heart. Help, Thanks, Wow is specifically about prayer, but embedded in that is all her ways of making you feel like openness and goodness and God, whoever She really is, are important and easy and just possible in ways that in everyday life seem...less possible.
Lamott is somewhere to go for inspiration, and I felt that from this book for sure. I wish it had been a bit longer or more full or somehow made me slow down & reflect, but there is also much I will take with me, and I'm, as always, grateful for her voice & care.
EDITED 8/8/23: I think about this book often, in moments of awe & in moments of panic, and so I am amending my original review of 4 stars & making it 5. Something that sticks with me this much is definitely 5 stars.
It's been a while since I read anything by Lamott, and it is always something that hits your heart. Help, Thanks, Wow is specifically about prayer, but embedded in that is all her ways of making you feel like openness and goodness and God, whoever She really is, are important and easy and just possible in ways that in everyday life seem...less possible.
Lamott is somewhere to go for inspiration, and I felt that from this book for sure. I wish it had been a bit longer or more full or somehow made me slow down & reflect, but there is also much I will take with me, and I'm, as always, grateful for her voice & care.
EDITED 8/8/23: I think about this book often, in moments of awe & in moments of panic, and so I am amending my original review of 4 stars & making it 5. Something that sticks with me this much is definitely 5 stars.
January 10, 2013
Love Anne Lamott's writing. "like" her FB page if you want some great occasional doses of brilliance and wit.
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