"I personally would rather do the existentially essential things in life on foot. If you live in England and your girlfriend is in Sicily, and it is clear you want to marry her, then you should walk to Sicily to propose. For these things travel by car or aeroplane is not the right thing."
I knew this Herzog quote, and I also knew of a book he had written that concerned walking from Munich to Paris to visit an ailing friend. I thought perhaps this was evidence of a larger personal philosophy that he held. It sounded quite appealing.
I wanted to read this book, but discovered that it was somewhat rare and expensive. The New York Public Library owns a copy which is not allowed outside the library. But it's a slim volume, only 90 pages, something I was certain I could finish in a single sitting.
A plan emerged in my brain. I would walk to the library, read the book entirely, then walk home, satisfied with a new life philosophy.
Because I am lazy, I didn’t leave my apartment until 2:30 in the afternoon. It was also a very cold day, and the walk was going to be unpleasant.
I walked from Brooklyn to Queens, then crossed the 59th Street Bridge into Manhattan. I arrived at the library around 4:30, received the book, and seated myself in my favorite room in the library, the map room. I was across from a man with dreadlocks and a number of face tattoos. His jacket and belongings covered all available table space in front of him. I didn't dare ask him to move them.
I begin to read. Herzog mentions in the forward that these were journal entries and it wasn’t until years after they were written that he considered having them published. He makes a lot of concise observations. Most are not terribly unusual, but filtered through Herzog’s prose, they often have a kind of nihilistic beauty to them. His observations are occasionally punctuated by wonderful vignettes.
"An elderly woman, plump and impoverished, gathering wood, talks to me of her children one by one, where they were born, when they died. Since she is aware that I want to go on, she talks three times as fast, skipping the deaths of three children, although adding them later on, unwilling to let even one fate slip away: and this in a dialect which makes it hard for me to follow what she is saying. After the demise of an entire generation of offspring, she would speak no more about herself except to say that she gathers wood everyday; I should have stayed longer."
I drank a large coffee in the library’s cafe and started to pay attention to the time. It was 6:00. I had less than two hours to finish the book. Somehow, I had only made it to page 40. The map room was now nearly empty.
Around 7:00, I lost confidence in my ability to finish the book on time. I tried reading a page a minute, but I was not fast enough. I overheard one of the librarians say that the map room would be closing at 7:30, ahead of the rest of the library. I worried and attempted to read faster. By this point, I only had 20 pages to go.
I imagined bargaining with the librarian. I would show him how close I was to finishing and beg for a bit more time. Recognizing our shared love of the written word, perhaps seeing a younger version of himself, he would relent.
This was not how it went. He started to turn down the lights at 7:25. He came over to tell me the map room was closing. His eyes were glazed over. He probably has a lot of experience kicking out homeless people. He was clearly in no mood for bargaining, even after I showed him the meager ten pages I had left.
“We can hold it and you can come back tomorrow.”
This library is already a bit inconvenient, and I can’t go through my entire walk again. This is too much to explain. But I have a backup plan.
When he turned his back, I took out my iPhone and snapped pictures of the remaining ten pages. Satisfied, I return the book to him. I told him to reshelve it, and he now seemed incredulous, and he reminded me I can come back to finish it. I decided against explaining my ingenious solution and risking my iPhone being seized. He had a beard.
With time removed from the equation, I was able to enjoy the remaining pages at the relaxed pace at which I began.
The book ends. It is not a philosophy. It is a journal. If there is anything to be said about why one would make such a journey on foot, it is not said in this book.
When Herzog reaches the target of his journey, the entire scene occupies less than half a page; an afterthought. It is, however, the most poignant scene in the entire book, in part because the preceding pages have made it clear that Herzog has no use for sentimentality.
Perhaps my own absurd notion of walking to the library was in vain. I walk downtown to meet J for dinner, and along the way I ponder my own desire to walk. Is it a means of being alone with my thoughts? Is it my equivalent of prayer?
In Flatiron, I pass a neon-lit bar where a man plays a violin-like instrument emphatically for bored patrons. Down the street, a storefront features a giant screen where a crude 3D rendered man advertises pilates.
J had mentioned earlier that he would be on a date, but he intended to be finished in time for dinner with me. When I arrived to meet him at 14th Street, he was walking with a girl. He introduced me as the person who had taught him everything he knew about online dating. I apologized profusely to his date and we exchanged pleasantries. This changing of the guards completed and the girl disappeared into the night. J and I found the restaurant.
J insisted we share hummus, since he was not very hungry. This was not reflected by the lack of restraint he showed towards the food when it arrived. I had no choice but to order a second hummus.
Though it was increasingly unpleasant out, I walked home. I walked across the Williamsburg Bridge and up to Greenpoint. I was nearly frozen when I walked past Black Rabbit. I saw a familiar person through the window, so I stopped in and joined her at the bar, where she was drawing in her notebook. I told her about my quest, and my own uncertainties about what, if anything, I learned from it.
The bartender realized it was past closing time, and pulled the curtains, but let us stay to finish our drinks. Then we were outside where a thin layer of white had covered everything. The outside world was transformed in the brief moment I was away from it. We said goodbye and I returned home almost exactly 12 hours after I left.