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Operators and Things: The Inner Life of a Schizophrenic
Paperback
Published July 7, 2011
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October 28, 2023
Barbara O'Brien is the credited author but the intro makes it clear that this is a pseudonym and that no one knows who she was/is. And tho it reads as authentic, no one can guarantee that it really is.
The author is a young woman in the late 1950s, quite intelligent and in a very responsible position. She notices a lot of destructive office politix going on around her, and one day ...
"Let us say that when you awake tomorrow, you find standing at your bedside a man with purple scale-skin who tells you that has just arrived from Mars, that he is studying the human species, and that he has selected your mind for the kind of on-the-spot examination he wants to make.... Fixing his three eyes sternly upon you, he warns you not to reveal his presence; if you attempt to do so, he threatens, he will kill you instantly.
"You may wonder, perhaps, if you are sane. But the Man from Mars is standing before you, clear and colorful, and his voice is loud and distinct. On the basis of what you can so clearly see and hear, you accept the fact, astounding as it is, that the stranger is what he says he is."
And thus begins the author's six month long psychotic break. Paranoid schizophrenia, to be precise. In her new world, she becomes one of many Things being controlled by Operators. They tell her what to do, where to go, what to say - who to be. There's a lot of in-fighting among the Operators which adds to the author's distress, particularly when she's "dummetized" (that is, when the Operators essentially wipe her brain clean).
After about that six months, the Operators start directing her to people who might be able to help her break back into the real world, and eventually a psychoanalyst provides enough input that she is able to self-cure - something I'd never known could happen.
Operators and Things, then, is the story of the beginning, middle, and end of her schizophrenic period. It's absolutely fascinating because of the insights she was able to develop looking back. And it's a must read if you, or anyone you know, is affected by schizophrenia.
The author is a young woman in the late 1950s, quite intelligent and in a very responsible position. She notices a lot of destructive office politix going on around her, and one day ...
"Let us say that when you awake tomorrow, you find standing at your bedside a man with purple scale-skin who tells you that has just arrived from Mars, that he is studying the human species, and that he has selected your mind for the kind of on-the-spot examination he wants to make.... Fixing his three eyes sternly upon you, he warns you not to reveal his presence; if you attempt to do so, he threatens, he will kill you instantly.
"You may wonder, perhaps, if you are sane. But the Man from Mars is standing before you, clear and colorful, and his voice is loud and distinct. On the basis of what you can so clearly see and hear, you accept the fact, astounding as it is, that the stranger is what he says he is."
And thus begins the author's six month long psychotic break. Paranoid schizophrenia, to be precise. In her new world, she becomes one of many Things being controlled by Operators. They tell her what to do, where to go, what to say - who to be. There's a lot of in-fighting among the Operators which adds to the author's distress, particularly when she's "dummetized" (that is, when the Operators essentially wipe her brain clean).
After about that six months, the Operators start directing her to people who might be able to help her break back into the real world, and eventually a psychoanalyst provides enough input that she is able to self-cure - something I'd never known could happen.
Operators and Things, then, is the story of the beginning, middle, and end of her schizophrenic period. It's absolutely fascinating because of the insights she was able to develop looking back. And it's a must read if you, or anyone you know, is affected by schizophrenia.
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September 16, 2024What an odd artifact. I wasn’t sure if I was going to buy that this was true until the last third.
The middle really is a slog as you’re pretty much stuck in the blandly wondrous reality of a paranoid schizophrenic, but the analysis at the end fascinated me. Of course some of her theorizing is now out of date (as far as I understand it), but it’s the personal perspective on what exactly her unconscious mind was trying to do that compelled me most. Surprisingly light and humorous for a work like this.
“The day I resigned I was a little blue. Would I ever get to be a really good practicing realist, I wondered. I decided, optimistically perhaps, that if I watched myself carefully, I never would.”
The middle really is a slog as you’re pretty much stuck in the blandly wondrous reality of a paranoid schizophrenic, but the analysis at the end fascinated me. Of course some of her theorizing is now out of date (as far as I understand it), but it’s the personal perspective on what exactly her unconscious mind was trying to do that compelled me most. Surprisingly light and humorous for a work like this.
“The day I resigned I was a little blue. Would I ever get to be a really good practicing realist, I wondered. I decided, optimistically perhaps, that if I watched myself carefully, I never would.”
Displaying 1 - 2 of 2 reviews