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Evenings with Cary Grant: Recollections in His Own Words and by Those Who Knew Him Best
Charming witty effortlessly debonair and elegant Cary Grant was the ultimate leading man a silver screen icon who seemed to embody all that a movie star should be. But beneath the glamour was a real and complicated man ä surprisingly vulnerable unabashedly romantic often exacting perfectionist who rose above a traumatic childhood and failed marriages to become an incomparable Hollywood legend. In this sublimely truthful and candid portrait biographer Nancy Nelson draws on interviews with Grant as well as material from his personal papers along with loving revelatory reminiscences from some of his closest friends and loved ones ä including Katharine Hepburn Gregory Peck Audrey Hepburn Elizabeth Taylor Sophia Loren Quincy Jones James Stewart and many more ä to reveal the vaudevillian actor lover and father. With a treasury of both well-loved and rarely seen photographs and a foreword by Grant's wife Barbara and daughter Jennifer this is the definitive biography of one of the screen's greatest stars
414 pages, Paperback
First published October 1, 1991
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Nancy Nelson
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 52 reviews
November 25, 2016
Is there a woman (at least of my generation) who isn't in love with Cary Grant. He is handsome, his smile brings a smile to your face, and in so many of the wonderful movies he has made has such charm and warmth. I learned from reading what others in the movie industry and outside said that Grant was a loving, generous and devoted friend. He frequently bought gifts for friends--for no special reason. And he was extremely generous to charitable causes but often anyomously. The book is based upon quotes from friends and the many live "Conversations with Cary" he made toward the end of his life. Boy, I would have liked to see one of them, but he insisted that they not be recorded or filmed. He was very precise in his work, and required the same from co-workers. He had five wives throughout his life, but his last love, Barbara seemed to be the best. He was loving and faithful to his mother, making many trips to England to visit her. His marriage to Dyan Cannon, gave him his only child, Jennifer, and he was a great father. The book has many candid pictures which are delightful. I fell in love again with Cary. I've requested every one of his movies the library has (that I don't already own), and will have a movie marathon!
February 14, 2016
Nancy Nelson, after years of perseverance, convinced Cary Grant after his retirement to do the "Evenings/Conversations with..." tours, and although public speaking was on his 'least favorite things to do' list, he grew to enjoy visiting various venues in the country and spending time with his adoring public. In fact, he died in November 1986 prior to doing one of these evenings. Nelson "...envisioned a modest memoir..."; however, Barbara Grant not only provided access to many friends of Cary Grant, but also provided access to Grant's personal papers, letters and other information. "My notes from Grant's Conversations have been enhanced by selections from his articles and from Grant's personal papers. The one hundred fifty interviews proved to be invaluable." Thus has Nancy Nelson very graciously kept the evenings and conversations going in a very classy, first rate book which allows the reader to spend evenings with Cary Grant through his own words and the wonderful stories shared by those who knew him and worked with him. If you were to read one book about Cary Grant, in my opinion, this would be the one to read.
June 23, 2021
Sorry to my husband, but the only man living or dead I would leave him for would be Cary Grant! Be still my heart! What a beautiful, funny, and touching tribute to him. As if I wasn’t a big enough fan already, this book made me love him even more!
September 15, 2017
When I was going through a particularly bad time a month or so ago, my husband came back from the library, grinning as if he had found a treasure. Indeed he had. In the library's non-fiction section, he had stumbled upon a book on Cary Grant. It was not a biography, though it did trace the growth of the man called Archibald Leach and the artiste known as Cary Grant. I really wasn't in the mood to read (or write or work or do anything at all), but this was Cary Grant!
While the blurbs at the back is most often used to hype a book, I was struck by what Gregory Peck had to say about Grant: 'The first book about the real Cary - lively, warm, always entertaining, totally honest - like the man himself.' So I flipped to where Nancy Nelson, the author (and Grant's agent on the lecture circuit during the last years of his life), had written about the background of the book.
Nancy's first interaction with Cary Grant was over the telephone. Ginger Rogers was represented by the lecture bureau of which Nancy was vice-president, and for one of her appearances, she had provided a photograph of herself with Cary Grant instead of the usual (and more obvious) choice - Fred Astaire. But they needed Grant's approval as well. Grant was by this time, long retired from the arc lights, and had steadfastly maintained his privacy. So Nancy wrote asking for his approval. Within days, she got a call back from Cary Grant. He wanted to know how Ginger was, where he could find her, and did Nancy have a number where he could reach her? So casual and easy was the conversation that Nancy almost forgot to ask him about the photograph.
Soon, however, she was trying to convince him to join the lecture circuit himself. 'Who would listen to an old geezer like me?' demurred Grant when she first asked. (It was 1982; Grant was in his late 70s.) Then, after he agreed, and arrived in the US, he had another qualm. 'It's too much to charge that poor man,' said Grant. I'm not Pavarotti with a big production. I'm just a guy who's going to sit on a stool and answer some questions. You give me that man's number and I'll tell him I'll come for a lower fee.'
By this time, I was smiling. And my husband looked like a cat who had eaten all the cream. ('You smiled for three and a half seconds!)
That first lecture went exceedingly well, with Grant holding an audience of 2600 people captive for two and a half hours. But he was not very keen to do any more. But almost a year after that initial lecture, Cary Grant persuaded Nancy to start her own agency, and promised he would be her first client. So began a professional relationship that would only end with Grant's death.
Cary Grant had steadfastly refused to pen his autobiography. But Nancy Nelson kept detailed notes of the 36 public appearances he made between late 1983 and late 1986, when he died, intending to write a memoir based on her notes. But meetings with two of Grant's closest friends after his death, which ended in laughter and in tears, made her expand her original premise.
Grant's widow, Barbara, helped Nancy to get interviews with Grant's friends and colleagues, both famous and not so famous. Cary Grant had filed all his correspondence. Barbara Grant provided that immense collection to Nancy, along with photographs, early contracts, scripts, jokes, notebooks, speeches, etc. Grant's friends, introduced by Barbara and by Katherine Hepburn, were more than happy to part with Grant's letters to them.
The book begins with the birth of Archibald Alexander Leach on 18th January 1904 in Bristol, England. He was thirteen when he discovered the theatre; by the next year, Grant was bunking school to attend the matinee at the theatre. Later that same year, he ran away to join Bob Fender's troop of knockabout comedians, writing a letter to Pender posing as his own father.
We learn about his early days - how he came to the US, how he sold ties out of a suitcase on Broadway, or became a walking advertisement for the race track on stilts, how he took part in vaudeville acts whenever he got a chance... It was the memory of these days of hardship, and the unexpected kindness of Lucrezia Bori, the lyric soprano of the Metropolitan Opera, that made Grant generous to other strugglers throughout his life.
Finally, from vaudeville, where he got his first speaking part in The Woman Pays, he moved rather quickly to Broadway where his friendship with Arthur Hammerstein's nephew got him the role of the understudy for Golden Dawn. Though he had quite a few successes on Broadway, Grant flunked Fox Film Corporation's talent hunt. '...bowlegged, and his neck is too thick' was how he was summarily dismissed.
In a bid to legitimise his stage appearances, he began appearing in musicals, and was successful enough to buy himself a new car. But Grant wanted more - he had his eyes on the motion picture and begged to be released from his contract. A screen test with Paramount gave him his first break, and a new name. The studio didn't want a hero named Archibald Leach. And so emerged Cary Grant. (That would lead to one of Grant's famous quotes, when told by an admirer that he would love to be Cary Grant: 'So would I!')
In a later conversation with Roderick Mann, Grant admitted that there were so many advantages to the new name - every Christmas he telephoned Clark Gable to enquire if Gable had got any monogrammed stuff that he didn't want. 'If he said yes, I'd hurry around, and we'd exchange initialed presents.'
Grant's first feature film was This is the Night, and by the end of the year, he had six more films opposite some of the biggest names in Hollywood. Mae West often claimed to have 'discovered Grant'. (If that man can talk, I want him for my costar.) And despite his reluctance to talk ill of anyone, Grant made the exception in the case of West: 'She was intent upon what she wanted to do, and did it. Everyone else suffered the consequences...'.
Grant had already done eight films before acting with West. But his professional life wasn't all that great. So he made excursions into Radio, working with some of the best talent in town. Paramount had also begun loaning him out to other studios. In 1934, one such loan to RKO had him starring with Katherine Hepburn in Sylvia Scarlett, the first of four movies he would do with her. This would be his breakthrough film, and the beginning of a lifelong friendship with Hepburn. According to Katherine Hepburn, Grant '...was the only reason to see Sylvia Scarlett. It was a terrible picture, but he was wonderful in it.'
Finally in 1937 came a film that advanced Grant's career - The Awful Truth with Irene Dunne. Grant hated working in the film, however, since director Leo McCarey didn't have a script. Two successes at Paramount and one at MGM propelled Grant to end his contract with Paramount and freelance, something that was unheard of at that time. Paramount offered him a stupendous sum of money - $3500 per week - to stay, but Grant wanted not only the liberty to choose his roles, but also his co-stars. It is interesting to learn that Grant, now on his way up as a saleable star, was not without his own idols. He remembers being so nervous at meeting Greta Garbo that he struck out his hand and said, 'Oh, I'm so happy you met me.'
Nancy does not shy away from tackling the oft-repeated canard about Grant's sexuality either. Grant was amused by the rumour that he was gay. According to him, it just made women want to prove them wrong. As one of his co-stars put it, Grant was admired by the men and loved by the women; and the more well-liked you are, the more the envy that surrounds you.
The book also chronicles his loving relationship with both his parents, and how he took care of both at different times, despite the distance between them. It faithfully records his romances with Phyllis Brooks and Sophia Loren, his five marriages (with Virginia Cherrill, the already twice married Barbara Hutton, Betsy Drake, Dyan Cannon, and Barbara Grant), and his absolute love for his daughter, Jennifer, whom he called his 'best production'.
It chronicles his dislike of Arsenic and Old Lace ('I'd have been better as one of the old aunts!'), and how his attention to detail infuriated the set designers of Walk, Don't Run. (He made them rebuild a set because they had forgotten continuity.) And how, while shooting An Affair to Remember, he pushed the costume designers into a tizzy because he pointed out that the buttons on the ship's stewards' uniforms were different from those that stewards wore on the real Queen Mary. The filmmakers dismissed his concerns, noting that audience wouldn't know the difference. Grant was adamant. 'Yes, but I'll know it.' The buttons were changed.
Reminiscences from his friends pepper the pages - Katherine Hepburn, Ingrid Bergman, Grace Kelly, James Stewart Gregory Peck... he seems to have been not just liked but loved by both contemporaries and newcomers. Co-stars, both male and female go on record to talk of his generosity as an actor, of his need to ensure the picture was good, not just himself. Ralph Bellamy, his co-star on The Awful Truth said, 'There was no upstaging. Quite the opposite. He would give you your moment. He was always laughing and great to work with - friendly and receptive.'
Douglas Fairbanks Jr. credits Grant with giving him one of his best remembered roles in Gunga Din, telling him that he would play whichever part Fairbanks refused. 'He was wonderful,' reminisces Fairbanks, 'and the most generous player I 've ever worked with.' Rosalind Russell called Grant her black-eyed cupid - he had introduced her to his friend, Frederick Brisson. Ingrid Bergman was grateful for his public support of her during her time of trial. Alfred Hitchcock told George Barrie, 'Knowing Cary is the greatest association I've had with any film actor. Cary's the only actor I ever loved my whole life.'
The only peeve that Grant had - with David Niven, one of his closest friends - is also faithfully narrated. Niven had a habit of appropriating others' stories, and Grant was irritated to find his stories in Niven's autobiography The Moon is a Balloon.
Grant always wrote long, hand-written letters to his friends (the foundation of this book), and he kept binders full of notes, including his collection of jokes. Grant was also fond of practical jokes. While staying at William Randolph Hearst's mansion, he took a ride in a plane flown by Hearst Jr. They filled paper bags with flour and buzzed around the hangar throwing the bags at the asphalt roof. It destroyed the roof and frightened the guests. Hearst Sr. was not amused.
His accountant, a friend of long standing, records how Grant steadfastly refused to take advantage of tax loopholes (at one point, he was paying a whopping 93% in taxes), and of how he hated to waste money, even when he was on an expense account. But Grant, unable to take part in the war (he applied, and was rejected) donated a lot of his time and money to the war effort. He also gave generously to charity, and friends and even complete strangers (to him at the time) vouch for his personal generosity.
A number of scriptwriters (Richard Brooks, Sidney Sheldon) owe their start as directors to his generosity of spirit. Leading actors (Richard Anderson, Ramon Navarro, Gilbert Roland, Antonio Moreno) have owed roles in the beginning days of their careers to Grant's recommendations.
Thus is drawn the picture of a man, who was truly beloved of all who knew him; not an autobiography, not a salacious peek into a celebrity's private life, not rumours or conjecture, not even a personal look at Nancy Nelson's relationship with Cary Grant. Instead, Nelson retreats to the background, acceding centre stage to the voices of the many people who were close to Cary Grant, as colleague or friend, or to those whose paths crossed that of a gentleman's and could not forget him.
More importantly, we get to hear Cary Grant's voice, full of the charm and the dignity that he exhibited onscreen, coupled with some naughty jokes that were part of his vaudeville background, his honesty about his experiments with LSD and hypnotism, and to see some extremely rare photographs that capture the almost impish delight in his eyes - 'The most memorable thing about Cary was his sense of joy.'
I like biographies, a peek into the life of people I admire, and to know a little bit more of what shaped their choices and their life experiences. This must be the first book in ages that I have devoured in one sitting, putting aside even work so I could finish reading it cover to cover. I laughed outright at some of the episodes, and was touched at some of the others. Each episode, narrated by someone else, gave me a clearer, and more endearing picture of Grant, the man.
It is not the most perfectly written book - it is not chronological, so you are weaving back and forth as to timelines, and it could have done with tighter editing, but reading it is like being introduced to Cary Grant, and coming back each time knowing you had spent a delightful evening with a delightful human being. As James Forsyth remarked, 'In this book you will discover the real Cary Grant, and you will love him even more.' I did. And I do.
While the blurbs at the back is most often used to hype a book, I was struck by what Gregory Peck had to say about Grant: 'The first book about the real Cary - lively, warm, always entertaining, totally honest - like the man himself.' So I flipped to where Nancy Nelson, the author (and Grant's agent on the lecture circuit during the last years of his life), had written about the background of the book.
Nancy's first interaction with Cary Grant was over the telephone. Ginger Rogers was represented by the lecture bureau of which Nancy was vice-president, and for one of her appearances, she had provided a photograph of herself with Cary Grant instead of the usual (and more obvious) choice - Fred Astaire. But they needed Grant's approval as well. Grant was by this time, long retired from the arc lights, and had steadfastly maintained his privacy. So Nancy wrote asking for his approval. Within days, she got a call back from Cary Grant. He wanted to know how Ginger was, where he could find her, and did Nancy have a number where he could reach her? So casual and easy was the conversation that Nancy almost forgot to ask him about the photograph.
Soon, however, she was trying to convince him to join the lecture circuit himself. 'Who would listen to an old geezer like me?' demurred Grant when she first asked. (It was 1982; Grant was in his late 70s.) Then, after he agreed, and arrived in the US, he had another qualm. 'It's too much to charge that poor man,' said Grant. I'm not Pavarotti with a big production. I'm just a guy who's going to sit on a stool and answer some questions. You give me that man's number and I'll tell him I'll come for a lower fee.'
By this time, I was smiling. And my husband looked like a cat who had eaten all the cream. ('You smiled for three and a half seconds!)
That first lecture went exceedingly well, with Grant holding an audience of 2600 people captive for two and a half hours. But he was not very keen to do any more. But almost a year after that initial lecture, Cary Grant persuaded Nancy to start her own agency, and promised he would be her first client. So began a professional relationship that would only end with Grant's death.
Cary Grant had steadfastly refused to pen his autobiography. But Nancy Nelson kept detailed notes of the 36 public appearances he made between late 1983 and late 1986, when he died, intending to write a memoir based on her notes. But meetings with two of Grant's closest friends after his death, which ended in laughter and in tears, made her expand her original premise.
Grant's widow, Barbara, helped Nancy to get interviews with Grant's friends and colleagues, both famous and not so famous. Cary Grant had filed all his correspondence. Barbara Grant provided that immense collection to Nancy, along with photographs, early contracts, scripts, jokes, notebooks, speeches, etc. Grant's friends, introduced by Barbara and by Katherine Hepburn, were more than happy to part with Grant's letters to them.
The book begins with the birth of Archibald Alexander Leach on 18th January 1904 in Bristol, England. He was thirteen when he discovered the theatre; by the next year, Grant was bunking school to attend the matinee at the theatre. Later that same year, he ran away to join Bob Fender's troop of knockabout comedians, writing a letter to Pender posing as his own father.
We learn about his early days - how he came to the US, how he sold ties out of a suitcase on Broadway, or became a walking advertisement for the race track on stilts, how he took part in vaudeville acts whenever he got a chance... It was the memory of these days of hardship, and the unexpected kindness of Lucrezia Bori, the lyric soprano of the Metropolitan Opera, that made Grant generous to other strugglers throughout his life.
Finally, from vaudeville, where he got his first speaking part in The Woman Pays, he moved rather quickly to Broadway where his friendship with Arthur Hammerstein's nephew got him the role of the understudy for Golden Dawn. Though he had quite a few successes on Broadway, Grant flunked Fox Film Corporation's talent hunt. '...bowlegged, and his neck is too thick' was how he was summarily dismissed.
In a bid to legitimise his stage appearances, he began appearing in musicals, and was successful enough to buy himself a new car. But Grant wanted more - he had his eyes on the motion picture and begged to be released from his contract. A screen test with Paramount gave him his first break, and a new name. The studio didn't want a hero named Archibald Leach. And so emerged Cary Grant. (That would lead to one of Grant's famous quotes, when told by an admirer that he would love to be Cary Grant: 'So would I!')
In a later conversation with Roderick Mann, Grant admitted that there were so many advantages to the new name - every Christmas he telephoned Clark Gable to enquire if Gable had got any monogrammed stuff that he didn't want. 'If he said yes, I'd hurry around, and we'd exchange initialed presents.'
Grant's first feature film was This is the Night, and by the end of the year, he had six more films opposite some of the biggest names in Hollywood. Mae West often claimed to have 'discovered Grant'. (If that man can talk, I want him for my costar.) And despite his reluctance to talk ill of anyone, Grant made the exception in the case of West: 'She was intent upon what she wanted to do, and did it. Everyone else suffered the consequences...'.
Grant had already done eight films before acting with West. But his professional life wasn't all that great. So he made excursions into Radio, working with some of the best talent in town. Paramount had also begun loaning him out to other studios. In 1934, one such loan to RKO had him starring with Katherine Hepburn in Sylvia Scarlett, the first of four movies he would do with her. This would be his breakthrough film, and the beginning of a lifelong friendship with Hepburn. According to Katherine Hepburn, Grant '...was the only reason to see Sylvia Scarlett. It was a terrible picture, but he was wonderful in it.'
Finally in 1937 came a film that advanced Grant's career - The Awful Truth with Irene Dunne. Grant hated working in the film, however, since director Leo McCarey didn't have a script. Two successes at Paramount and one at MGM propelled Grant to end his contract with Paramount and freelance, something that was unheard of at that time. Paramount offered him a stupendous sum of money - $3500 per week - to stay, but Grant wanted not only the liberty to choose his roles, but also his co-stars. It is interesting to learn that Grant, now on his way up as a saleable star, was not without his own idols. He remembers being so nervous at meeting Greta Garbo that he struck out his hand and said, 'Oh, I'm so happy you met me.'
Nancy does not shy away from tackling the oft-repeated canard about Grant's sexuality either. Grant was amused by the rumour that he was gay. According to him, it just made women want to prove them wrong. As one of his co-stars put it, Grant was admired by the men and loved by the women; and the more well-liked you are, the more the envy that surrounds you.
The book also chronicles his loving relationship with both his parents, and how he took care of both at different times, despite the distance between them. It faithfully records his romances with Phyllis Brooks and Sophia Loren, his five marriages (with Virginia Cherrill, the already twice married Barbara Hutton, Betsy Drake, Dyan Cannon, and Barbara Grant), and his absolute love for his daughter, Jennifer, whom he called his 'best production'.
It chronicles his dislike of Arsenic and Old Lace ('I'd have been better as one of the old aunts!'), and how his attention to detail infuriated the set designers of Walk, Don't Run. (He made them rebuild a set because they had forgotten continuity.) And how, while shooting An Affair to Remember, he pushed the costume designers into a tizzy because he pointed out that the buttons on the ship's stewards' uniforms were different from those that stewards wore on the real Queen Mary. The filmmakers dismissed his concerns, noting that audience wouldn't know the difference. Grant was adamant. 'Yes, but I'll know it.' The buttons were changed.
Reminiscences from his friends pepper the pages - Katherine Hepburn, Ingrid Bergman, Grace Kelly, James Stewart Gregory Peck... he seems to have been not just liked but loved by both contemporaries and newcomers. Co-stars, both male and female go on record to talk of his generosity as an actor, of his need to ensure the picture was good, not just himself. Ralph Bellamy, his co-star on The Awful Truth said, 'There was no upstaging. Quite the opposite. He would give you your moment. He was always laughing and great to work with - friendly and receptive.'
Douglas Fairbanks Jr. credits Grant with giving him one of his best remembered roles in Gunga Din, telling him that he would play whichever part Fairbanks refused. 'He was wonderful,' reminisces Fairbanks, 'and the most generous player I 've ever worked with.' Rosalind Russell called Grant her black-eyed cupid - he had introduced her to his friend, Frederick Brisson. Ingrid Bergman was grateful for his public support of her during her time of trial. Alfred Hitchcock told George Barrie, 'Knowing Cary is the greatest association I've had with any film actor. Cary's the only actor I ever loved my whole life.'
The only peeve that Grant had - with David Niven, one of his closest friends - is also faithfully narrated. Niven had a habit of appropriating others' stories, and Grant was irritated to find his stories in Niven's autobiography The Moon is a Balloon.
Grant always wrote long, hand-written letters to his friends (the foundation of this book), and he kept binders full of notes, including his collection of jokes. Grant was also fond of practical jokes. While staying at William Randolph Hearst's mansion, he took a ride in a plane flown by Hearst Jr. They filled paper bags with flour and buzzed around the hangar throwing the bags at the asphalt roof. It destroyed the roof and frightened the guests. Hearst Sr. was not amused.
His accountant, a friend of long standing, records how Grant steadfastly refused to take advantage of tax loopholes (at one point, he was paying a whopping 93% in taxes), and of how he hated to waste money, even when he was on an expense account. But Grant, unable to take part in the war (he applied, and was rejected) donated a lot of his time and money to the war effort. He also gave generously to charity, and friends and even complete strangers (to him at the time) vouch for his personal generosity.
A number of scriptwriters (Richard Brooks, Sidney Sheldon) owe their start as directors to his generosity of spirit. Leading actors (Richard Anderson, Ramon Navarro, Gilbert Roland, Antonio Moreno) have owed roles in the beginning days of their careers to Grant's recommendations.
Thus is drawn the picture of a man, who was truly beloved of all who knew him; not an autobiography, not a salacious peek into a celebrity's private life, not rumours or conjecture, not even a personal look at Nancy Nelson's relationship with Cary Grant. Instead, Nelson retreats to the background, acceding centre stage to the voices of the many people who were close to Cary Grant, as colleague or friend, or to those whose paths crossed that of a gentleman's and could not forget him.
More importantly, we get to hear Cary Grant's voice, full of the charm and the dignity that he exhibited onscreen, coupled with some naughty jokes that were part of his vaudeville background, his honesty about his experiments with LSD and hypnotism, and to see some extremely rare photographs that capture the almost impish delight in his eyes - 'The most memorable thing about Cary was his sense of joy.'
I like biographies, a peek into the life of people I admire, and to know a little bit more of what shaped their choices and their life experiences. This must be the first book in ages that I have devoured in one sitting, putting aside even work so I could finish reading it cover to cover. I laughed outright at some of the episodes, and was touched at some of the others. Each episode, narrated by someone else, gave me a clearer, and more endearing picture of Grant, the man.
It is not the most perfectly written book - it is not chronological, so you are weaving back and forth as to timelines, and it could have done with tighter editing, but reading it is like being introduced to Cary Grant, and coming back each time knowing you had spent a delightful evening with a delightful human being. As James Forsyth remarked, 'In this book you will discover the real Cary Grant, and you will love him even more.' I did. And I do.
October 6, 2023
What I loved about this biography of Cary Grant was how much of it was based on direct quotes from himself and his friends. I could hear his voice in my head, and it made me feel like I was seeing the real him, instead of a biographer’s opinion of him.
Nelson did an excellent job of making all the quotes flow, so that it is a smooth, informative, enjoyable read. She acknowledges the rumors and speculation about his life, but unless he or a friend directly addressed the topic, she does not respond to them.
The insider view of him is fascinating. It gives so much more depth to my enjoyment of his films. I just wish I could have met him.
Nelson did an excellent job of making all the quotes flow, so that it is a smooth, informative, enjoyable read. She acknowledges the rumors and speculation about his life, but unless he or a friend directly addressed the topic, she does not respond to them.
The insider view of him is fascinating. It gives so much more depth to my enjoyment of his films. I just wish I could have met him.
February 10, 2024
Wonderful book about a wonderfully talented actor!!
July 7, 2015
This book is an absolute love fest for Grant and true fans will appreciate it. When I say love fest I mean the book does not bring up any of the darker side of Grant unlike other bios (most recently Dyan Cannon's). If you're looking for juicy details on his marriages or his LSD use you won't find it here. However what you will find is lovely quotes from pretty much everyone in the business with their take on Grant. Nelson also has many quotes from the man himself since she was in charge of his Conversations with Cary Grant series that he did at the end of his life.
I really enjoyed reading this book because I felt like it came from a real place. The only think I would say is that I wish there had been a bit more about some of his films. I realize he has an expansive career but I would have loved to know more details. Maybe they don't exist though which is why the book didn't have it. I did appreciate the opinions of his fellow actors - sounds like he really was as charming as he looked.
Yes this book is out of print BUT I had no problem picking it up at my public library. It's still worth a read for any Cary Grant lovers.
I really enjoyed reading this book because I felt like it came from a real place. The only think I would say is that I wish there had been a bit more about some of his films. I realize he has an expansive career but I would have loved to know more details. Maybe they don't exist though which is why the book didn't have it. I did appreciate the opinions of his fellow actors - sounds like he really was as charming as he looked.
Yes this book is out of print BUT I had no problem picking it up at my public library. It's still worth a read for any Cary Grant lovers.
January 23, 2010
Ok, I may a little prejudiced about my review on this book because
I ADORE CARY GRANT!
And after having read this book I love him even more.
This biography was written by a woman who dealt with Mr. Grant for many years organizing personal appearance's for him where he would take the stage and show clips from his movies and answer audience questions for about 2 hours. These tours were titled "An Evening With Cary Grant" (hence the book title).
This book was approved by Cary's last wife and only child for publication so I think it is probably a pretty accurate accounting of his life.
I found it really fascinating to learn some of the unknown things about him, and I discovered even more qualities that made him a genuinely wonderful man.
There are hundreds of comments from the people he worked with and was friends with...every one of them kind words.
He really was the man he portrays in film, kind, intelligent, conciderate, talented, extremely funny, generous, and gorgeous!
If you love the 'Golden Age of Hollywood' this is a fun book to read.
I ADORE CARY GRANT!
And after having read this book I love him even more.
This biography was written by a woman who dealt with Mr. Grant for many years organizing personal appearance's for him where he would take the stage and show clips from his movies and answer audience questions for about 2 hours. These tours were titled "An Evening With Cary Grant" (hence the book title).
This book was approved by Cary's last wife and only child for publication so I think it is probably a pretty accurate accounting of his life.
I found it really fascinating to learn some of the unknown things about him, and I discovered even more qualities that made him a genuinely wonderful man.
There are hundreds of comments from the people he worked with and was friends with...every one of them kind words.
He really was the man he portrays in film, kind, intelligent, conciderate, talented, extremely funny, generous, and gorgeous!
If you love the 'Golden Age of Hollywood' this is a fun book to read.
August 8, 2011
While I will admit that I have always found Cary Grant to be handsome, I never imagined that I would find myself reading books about his life! It came about entirely by accident as I was standing in the bookstore a few months ago looking at a table of new books and came across the book of reminiscenses recently written by his daughter (Good Stuff by Jennifer Grant). I stood there paging through it looking for photos and found myself reading the first chapter. That was that - I put it on my library hold list when I got home and thoroughly enjoyed the read. I learned of this book which is a compilation of memories of Grant shared by many of his friends, many of whom were famous themselves. I was impressed, yet again, by what a bright man of character he was and by his devotion to his only child and his wife, Barbara.
September 11, 2016
I didn't think I could possibly love Cary Grant any more than I did, but after finishing this book, I totally do. :) He's one of my favorite classic film actors, and apparently he was a funny, kind, and classy guy in real life too. Though the format of the book wasn't the most cohesive at times (sometimes the quotes about him would seem random, like she wanted to include them but wasn't sure where they'd fit), it was so enjoyable to read that many quotes from Cary Grant himself and by people who knew him. I feel like I know a lot more about his life now, too. This book was interesting but never overly detailed or boring. And can I just say that learning how Cary Grant, Frank Sinatra, and Gregory Peck were such good friends in his later years completely made my day? I love the thought of those three hanging out together.
October 25, 2012
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Through the many anecdotes and quotes that Nelson assembles the reader learns not only about Grant, but about his friends and colleagues, like Alfred Hitchcock, Howard Hughes, and Katherine Hepburn. Although Evenings With Cary Grant is more of a tribute than a detailed biography, from the Rashomon-like recollections of pivotal moments in his career a real sense of the man comes through. Grant was a complex individual who was grateful for his career and success, but was always striving to discover his true essence.
Cary Grant: "If I can understand how I became who I am, I can use that to shape my life in the future. I want to live in reality. Dreams aren't for me."
Through the many anecdotes and quotes that Nelson assembles the reader learns not only about Grant, but about his friends and colleagues, like Alfred Hitchcock, Howard Hughes, and Katherine Hepburn. Although Evenings With Cary Grant is more of a tribute than a detailed biography, from the Rashomon-like recollections of pivotal moments in his career a real sense of the man comes through. Grant was a complex individual who was grateful for his career and success, but was always striving to discover his true essence.
Cary Grant: "If I can understand how I became who I am, I can use that to shape my life in the future. I want to live in reality. Dreams aren't for me."
November 22, 2015
After reading the memoir written by Dyan Cannon, which was interesting but a little gloomy, I really liked this biography. The author uses personal experience, interviews with those who knew Cary Grant, and access to his personal papers as the material for this book. It was interesting to see the story behind the man who was one of the greatest actors ever. His humor, charm, class, intelligence, talent and generosity made him a treasured friend to those who knew him. I've always been a Cary Grant fan, but now I think he is someone I would have loved to have as a friend.
March 31, 2020
This book is so good. After being let down by the “biography” by Marc Eliot it was so nice to read a book that really tells you who Grant was. That’s because Nancy Nelson uses not only Grant’s friends and family but also the words that the man spoke as well. It gives you a real insight to who he was and what he cared about. You also will laugh at how charming and funny Grant was through stories he tells and the stories of his friends. If you are a fan of Grant or really the Golden Age of Hollywood, Evenings With Cary Grant is a must read. My highest recommendation!
September 14, 2020
An enjoyable read, especially if you're a Cary Grant fan. The author, Nancy Nelson convinced Grant to do a 'one man show' after he had retired from movie-making, so she got to know him and his fifth wife, Barbara Harris, well. She was also able to gather first hand interviews and his personal notes. Those who knew him well respected and admired him. Even his ex-wives still kept in contact with him and seemed to appreciate his good qualities. It was also interesting to learn about his early years in England.
July 23, 2023
What a wonderful book! I've been reticent to read a Cary Grant biography/memoir, but when I learned about this one, I knew it was the one to read. Nelson's careful treatment of Grant's life is beautiful and heartwarming. From the outset she makes it clear that she will not pander to rumor and lies about Grant's life, and for that I was grateful. This memoir was just wonderful as it contained many of Grant's own words, the words of his friends, and many great photographs. It showed the real Grant, the man behind the film, as the great human he was.
March 11, 2024
This memoir is a loving tribute to a legendary figure, one of the best in its genre I've read. Other books have maligned Cary Grant’s character, his sexuality, his experiments with LSD, his five marriages. This book consists of anecdotes told by close friends, interspersed with Cary Grant’s own words. There are lots of pictures to illustrate the relationships, and not a mean word, making this the ideal bedside book to dip into before drifting off into frothy dreams.
January 10, 2009
A fun, witty and charming book about a great actor. There are a lot of laugh out loud stories. It was so good I was it had to come to an end. A lot of anecdotes of the past, his life and the celebrities he, and we, all came to know. A nice tribute. It is what you would expect - not a bad word about him.
April 1, 2017
I have read a few books about Cary Grant and this one seems the most true to his spirit. Since it was written with the support of his wife, Barbara, and daughter, Jennifer, I imagine that it is the most factually true, as well.
You get the sense that he really was loved and respected by his colleagues. He was was of the greatest screen actors and lived his life with grace and class.
You get the sense that he really was loved and respected by his colleagues. He was was of the greatest screen actors and lived his life with grace and class.
March 25, 2016
I really enjoyed this book. I do think it glossed over the more negative aspects of his life and personality, and was most definitely intended to show him in as positive a light as possible. But I think that goal was probably consistent with who he was as a person. Seemed like a lovely man. A well written and well researched book.
July 16, 2019
This book made me love Cary Grant all the more. He really was a kind, gentle man loved by all. I did kind of get lost in all the names and dates, which is why it got four stars instead of five from me.
The author does well to go over his life from the very beginning to end with his marriages, divorces, career and daughter. A very enjoyable book to get to know Cary Grant more!
The author does well to go over his life from the very beginning to end with his marriages, divorces, career and daughter. A very enjoyable book to get to know Cary Grant more!
April 21, 2013
I don't think this book was particularly well written...It jumped around from subject to subject. I often had to go back to figure out who was speaking. But it did sound like Cary Grant would have been a fascinating person to meet.
April 14, 2016
I've read several books on Cary Grant and this was a favorite. I love how it shared quotes and letters from people who actually knew him well which gave a clearer perspective of his character. It is charming and easy to read.
September 21, 2020
I have been a Cary Grant fan since I was a kid, watching old movies on T.V.B.V. (TV before video). This book is a celebration of Grant's life and work, based on stories that he told in a series of 'Evenings with Cary Grant' events that happened in the years before his death. In fact, he died in Iowa, where he was scheduled to appear that same night. Grant's own words are supplemented by stories from his close friends. He made and kept friends over periods of decades; once you were a friend, you were a friend for life.
I have read a lot about him. I think what struck me the most in this book is Grant's level of awareness of himself as a 'property' to be promoted and protected. He knew himself as an actor who stood for certain qualities: charming, graceful, well-dressed, good-humoured-- and he protected that image. As an example, he once did a kissing scene with (model) Suzy Parker, where he was supposed to bend over her as she lay on a bed and kiss her. He changed the scene so that she bent over to kiss him. This change accomplished two strategies: it made Parker the romantic aggressor, so that the much older Grant did not look like a lech (women regularly chased Grant in the movies; it was part of his appeal), and also Grant knew that gravity would not be kind to his face. Since Parker was much younger, and at the height of her beauty, he changed it around with no damage to his image or hers.
This attention to detail was constant on Grant's part, and the secret to his phenomenal success. He knew what was right for him: he was strong enough to stand up for himself, and gentle enough to ensure that he did not trample other people's rights.
He was a class act all the way. My taste in men at the age of 8 (when I first fell in love with Grant) was as flawless as Grant's appearance over a period of 60 years.
I have read a lot about him. I think what struck me the most in this book is Grant's level of awareness of himself as a 'property' to be promoted and protected. He knew himself as an actor who stood for certain qualities: charming, graceful, well-dressed, good-humoured-- and he protected that image. As an example, he once did a kissing scene with (model) Suzy Parker, where he was supposed to bend over her as she lay on a bed and kiss her. He changed the scene so that she bent over to kiss him. This change accomplished two strategies: it made Parker the romantic aggressor, so that the much older Grant did not look like a lech (women regularly chased Grant in the movies; it was part of his appeal), and also Grant knew that gravity would not be kind to his face. Since Parker was much younger, and at the height of her beauty, he changed it around with no damage to his image or hers.
This attention to detail was constant on Grant's part, and the secret to his phenomenal success. He knew what was right for him: he was strong enough to stand up for himself, and gentle enough to ensure that he did not trample other people's rights.
He was a class act all the way. My taste in men at the age of 8 (when I first fell in love with Grant) was as flawless as Grant's appearance over a period of 60 years.
November 18, 2018
Like its subject, this book was easy on the eyes. In fact, it may have been a tad too easy. Why?
Yes, Grant was a debonair charmer, poised, a top romantic leading man, an impeccable dresser, and comic actor who could be incredibly funny. Plus, I was surprised to learn he was not only humble, but incredibly shy about public speaking. After he retired because he believed he was too old to play believable romantic leads, he joined the board for Faberge, which I didn't know. This biography also introduced me to Grant's devotion to his daughter Jennifer, born February 26, 1966, when Grant was 62.
Nevertheless, although I enjoyed learning these and other facts about Grant (Archibald Leach), his parents, and wives, and learning about amusing antidotes, some quotations from his colleagues started to annoy me. It was as if author Nancy Nelson felt compelled to "sell" the readers on Cary Grant. (In fact, after a while, I hoped she'd interviewed one of his three ex-wives or his widow who dared to reveal he snored, sometimes had bad breath, or let gas in the bathtub. )
Yes, Grant was a talented actor (especially when he played against type--even if the public didn't like him in that role), but he was a human being--albeit one who might be deemed "larger than life."
Moreover, though, this biography was fun to read. (Note--had I sat down and read it straight-through, which I seldom have time to do with the best books, I would've finished it within a few hours.) Thus, the prose flowed--and it was entertaining. Plus, it taught me many facts for trivia contests (if I remember them).
Yes, Grant was a debonair charmer, poised, a top romantic leading man, an impeccable dresser, and comic actor who could be incredibly funny. Plus, I was surprised to learn he was not only humble, but incredibly shy about public speaking. After he retired because he believed he was too old to play believable romantic leads, he joined the board for Faberge, which I didn't know. This biography also introduced me to Grant's devotion to his daughter Jennifer, born February 26, 1966, when Grant was 62.
Nevertheless, although I enjoyed learning these and other facts about Grant (Archibald Leach), his parents, and wives, and learning about amusing antidotes, some quotations from his colleagues started to annoy me. It was as if author Nancy Nelson felt compelled to "sell" the readers on Cary Grant. (In fact, after a while, I hoped she'd interviewed one of his three ex-wives or his widow who dared to reveal he snored, sometimes had bad breath, or let gas in the bathtub. )
Yes, Grant was a talented actor (especially when he played against type--even if the public didn't like him in that role), but he was a human being--albeit one who might be deemed "larger than life."
Moreover, though, this biography was fun to read. (Note--had I sat down and read it straight-through, which I seldom have time to do with the best books, I would've finished it within a few hours.) Thus, the prose flowed--and it was entertaining. Plus, it taught me many facts for trivia contests (if I remember them).
November 19, 2017
This book warmed the cockney of my heart, showing us Cary Grant in his own words and in the words of friends, directors and fellow actors who knew him well. I would have liked (along with many movie-goers) a little more about the actual events on the set. Cary Grant was the man I'd like to be - and the man my wife wishes I was.
October 21, 2021
It took me awhile to finish...I kept rereading parts that were either so interesting or so dang funny! This book was such a real look into who Cary was. Not just the amazingly talented actor but, the beautiful person he was inside and out. I knew how the book was gonna end but I was still crying when I got there..
July 23, 2023
Covers his entire life with plenty of pictures, most not taken directly from his movies. These are not just things said in his Conversations show he did late in life. This gives a good view of his personal life and his views on living life. He pretty much lived up to his persona and beyond.
January 27, 2026
What a gem of a human Cary Grant was!
One thing that I particularly enjoyed about this were how many quotes and passages were straight from Cary's mouth making it feel like by the time you finished it you got to know who he was a person and in life.
One thing that I particularly enjoyed about this were how many quotes and passages were straight from Cary's mouth making it feel like by the time you finished it you got to know who he was a person and in life.
April 10, 2018
The author appears to have included every single quote and piece of information gathered, no matter how insignificant.
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