The Minister's Wife: Privileges, Pressures And Pitfalls

by Ann Benton

The Minister's Wife will show you how to make perfect cupcakes, turn out well-groomed children every Sunday morning and rise to the lofty heights where criticism cannot reach. In short, you will quickly become the model minister's wife. Unfortunately not. However, what this book will do for you is help you to look honestly at the privileges and problems of the manse and the rectory. It will free you up to become the best you can be, unencumbered by nagging concerns about issues that don t really matter. You are first and foremost a minister's wife before God. What a privilege! This book looks also at the minister's wife's responsibility to her husband and children, as well as to her wider family. It looks at the often-overlooked perks of the job, as well as at thorny issues such as boundaries, forgiveness and forbearance. This book contains wisdom from eight women, distilled for a wider audience. It will be an honest friend to the minister s wife, whether experienced or starting out.

Genres: Christian

208 pages, Paperback

First published October 1, 2011

About the author

Ann Benton is a graduate in Developmental Psychology and has been involved in schools both as a teacher and chair of governors. She and her husband John have raised four children. Ann is the author of a number of successful books dealing with family issues and frequently speaks at conferences and runs parenting courses. She lives in Guildford, Surrey, where John has been pastor of Chertsey St Baptist Church for over thirty years.

Reviews

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

I think people on the Tube thought I was reading a trashy Mills & Boon novel.

But: reassuring and sensible. I was grateful for how assiduously they avoided a one-size-fits-all model.

[Emma Fischer · Rating 4 out of 5]

The Minister’s Wife is a great book for those who are about to be a pastor’s wife (even to those already in the role). It is written by 8 different minister wives. Before each chapter they write a blurb about their lives as a minister’s wife and also what happened before the husband became a minister. I think this is a good insight for the readers, as it shows them the differences of the women and the strengths and/or struggles.

I believe Ann Benton ordered the chapters appropriately, as it starts with ‘Her responsibility to God’, than ‘Her husband’, than ‘Her family’ (the order how God tells us who to put first), than it goes to the other chapters ending with ‘Ten questions young ministers’ wives ask’.

In some of the chapters, there a sub points within sub points which a couple I found I had to flick back as I forgot which point it is on.

Stated in pages 23 – 24 in Chapter 1, Val Archer made a great point on how often we can become people pleasing and proud to the ministry. Also on page 24 it recommends other books to do with the topic, which I think is a great idea for further studying on that particular topic.

The reference is easy to read and find as it is in the back of the book in sections for the chapters. I have found the referencing have also been beneficial as it gives the reader more opportunities to follow up on certain topics.

I believe the fifth chapter, Pressure Points, is written compelling. It states what will/could happen and possible outcomes regarding money, church members and society’s view. I like the way in which the writer tells the reader how it is and doesn’t fluff it up to sound charming, as sometimes it’s not.

At the end of each chapter it follows up with ‘Reflection or Action’. It gives the readers questions for them to think about the certain topics. Most of these were things every ‘Minister’s Wife’ should think about. The following points are a few that I thought were great:
• In what ways can a woman jeopardize her husband’s ministry?
• Think through all the things you like about being a minister’s wife, and thank God for each of them.
• Which of the self-induced or self-aggravated pressures do you struggle with? How would you counsel you if you were someone else?
• What are the specific Bible truths you will need learn to hold on to when you are confronted with criticism?

I would highly recommend this book as it has shown me points I need to work on and also on things I didn’t even realize. This book has been a blessing to me.