Callan is a 7-year-old boy, neglected by his bickering parents and sitting in a hospital cafeteria playing video games to distract himself from the fact that his older brother is upstairs fighting for his life against cancer, when 6-year-old Colby sees him and says hello. She hates so badly seeing him there alone that, when her father has their food and is ready to leave, she leaves her beloved teddy bear with him for company.
This story follows Callan and Colby through their unshakable childhood bond, through the painful separation during adolescence, pausing for a brief time as they reconnect in the teenage years before tragedy spins Callan into numb despair and terrible life choices that culminate in a moment of heartbreaking betrayal at Callan’s 18th birthday party, a moment of shittiness so profound that it prompts Callan to do better. A year later, when Callan discovers Colby is attending the same university as he, he seizes the chance to draw her back into his life. But is he too damaged to be the kind of man Colby deserves?
The first 60% of this novel is close to perfection. It unfolds with straightforward but competent prose and deep emotionality, with lighthearted moments sprinkled among uglier truths: real life, in all its unpredictable messiness.
The novel sustains the reader’s emotional connection to the story to the end, and it’s absorbing and moving—I cried more than once—and felt authentic and it hurt.
***spoilers***
BUT…
The momentum of and my immersion in the story stalled when Callan and Colby began having sex. While it seemed likely that these two almost-20-year-olds would move their emotional connection to a sexual level, it felt like the author was ticking off a checklist of sexual positions: missionary, check, from behind, check, cunnilingus, check, girl-on-top, check, fellatio, check. On the floor, on the bed, on the kitchen counter, in the shower, check, check, check. Of course a couple of young adults madly in love are going to want to try everything, everywhere, and often, but did it have to read like an explicit textbook?
Then the whole lone-sojourn-in-the-desert thing. Maybe? Maybe there are people who could get emotional healing from going camping, not eating, not showering, and talking to the dead. But it felt a little OTT and I felt a little manipulated, even while I was crying with Callan over his brother’s letter. So this section didn’t really work for me, but that could be personal depending on how much a reader is into the metaphysical.
Callan’s confrontation with his parents needed to happen. But no way, NO WAY, do these two oblivious failures as parents suddenly drop to their knees, miraculously all about loving on Callan and wailing their mea culpa’s.
So it gets 4 stars instead of 5 but it’s a lovely YA book that isn’t lame, stupid, or phony and well worth the reading time.