If You Give an Architect a Contract

by Seth Kaufman

“If you give an architect a contract ... he’s going to ask for a set of keys,” Mr. Kaufman’s picture book, which was illustrated by Laura Lee Pedersen, starts innocuously enough. “When you give him the keys, he’ll jiggle them, which will remind him of money, and he’ll probably ask for a deposit.” Before long, the reader is immersed in a nightmare of delays, unforeseen expenses and indifferent contractors.--The New York Times


More than a perfect parody of a well-known children's series, If You Give an Architect a Contract is a hilarious cautionary tale about the joyful and nightmarish experience of home renovations. In other words, it's the perfect house-warming gift. Laura Lee Pedersen's slyly comical illustrations bring Seth Kaufman's traumatic comedy to life. Humor and satire abound from the first page to the inspired back-cover quotes. No home--or architecture office--should be without this book.

What the Critics Say:

"As a man who has had renovations done, and has read a lot of children's books, this book somehow assuaged the pain of both."--Joel Stein, Man Made: A Stupid Quest for Masculinity

"A great parody of 'If You Give A Mouse A Cookie' for anyone who has ever tried to have renovations done on their home!"--Jacqueline Woodson, Locomotion

Paperback

About the author

Seth Kaufman has been a reporter for the NY Post’s Page Six and the Editorial Director of TV Guide.com. His work has appeared in the New Yorker, the New York Times, N.Y Observer and many other publications, including supermarket tabloids. "The King of Pain," his first work of satirical fiction, was called "One of 2012's most enjoyable novels," by the New York Times. The sequel, "Nuns with Guns,"was called "Literary gold," by Radar Online. His 2018 book of music essays, "Metaphysical Graffiti,: was dubbed "the best in creative nonfiction," by the British press.
His comic novel "The Seductive Lady Vanessa of Manhattanshire," is an inventive retelling of Don Quixote. He is the co-author of two acclaimed sports memoirs, "Pitino; My Story" and "Eat My Schwartz." And the bestselling book Stealth War: How China Took Over While America's Elites Slept

Reviews

[Katie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great little comic book about the construction industry

[Cathy Bell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Short, cute book...and soooo true!!