Apologize My Ass

by Lee Smith

"Apologize My Ass" is a captivating and nostalgic coming-of-age novel that transports readers to the sweltering summer of 1972 in Opp, Alabama, also known as the City of Opportunity. Young Oliver Ellison cherishes his summers in this tight-knit town, where life lessons, both good and bad, are woven into the fabric of his upbringing. Armed with his trusty bicycle, Oliver effortlessly traverses the town of 6,493, shuttling between his grandmothers' houses and immersing himself in the vibrant tapestry of daily gossip and local affairs.

This particular summer proves to be more challenging than the rest as Opp grapples with record-breaking heatwaves. People strive to keep their cool, but tempers run short, exacerbated by the unfortunate incident of two young boys crashing their truck into the Dothan television station antenna, rendering everyone unable to enjoy their favorite shows. Boredom and irritability tinge the atmosphere, setting the stage for an unexpected turn of events.

Amidst the sweltering heat and simmering tensions, Oliver regularly visits his two eccentric and miserly great-uncles, who own a gas station conveniently located between his grandmothers' homes. Perched on a stool, Oliver silently absorbs the conversations that flow freely between the old men, feeling invisible to the adults around him. It is during one of these eavesdropping sessions that he overhears a seemingly innocuous conversation that quickly spirals into a misunderstanding.

This misunderstanding ignites a fiery feud between the two brothers, spreading like wildfire throughout the town. Lines are drawn, and the once-harmonious community finds itself divided as people choose sides. Fueled by a genuine desire to set things right, Oliver, now fourteen years old, takes it upon himself to share the truth of what he heard, aiming to restore peace and the simple magic that characterized Opp as the City of Opportunity.

Narrated by Oliver, with occasional assistance from an omniscient co-narrator, "Apologize My Ass" weaves together absurdity and sentimentality in a captivating narrative. It is a tale of good versus evil that showcases Opp's diverse and eclectic cast of characters, stimulating the reader's imagination from the very first page. Bellicose, audacious, comical, vindictive, narcissistic, wise, and brave—this coming-of-age story breathes life into all the facets of humanity.

Genres: Coming Of Age

247 pages, Kindle Edition

Published May 1, 2023

About the author

There is more than one author with this name

Reviews

[Alison · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review from a non-southerner. This is an adorable story. I laughed out loud multiple times and flew through the short chapters. Knowing the author is a physician made some parts even better. Excited to follow little Oliver Ellison’s story into adulthood in Opportunity of a Lifetime.

[Cyndy · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a delightful Book! Written during a time when kids had a lot of freedom to ride their bikes around town between grandparents and local shops.

[Deby · Rating 5 out of 5]

…just wonderful! I have NEVER laughed this much or this hard while reading a book. Thank you for sharing this good old southern family tale.🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

[Russell Kemp · Rating 5 out of 5]

All-around fantastic. Having grown up in the South at the time setting of Oliver’s narrative, it struck so many chords. Though I can’t claim the rural part (more the disappearing small suburb life), I see many people from my past and family reflected in these characters. A great book and I can’t wait to tear into “The Opportunity of a Lifetime” to see Oliver all grown up. Very enjoyable southern storytelling

[KATHY Dorris · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you’re a Southerner, you probably have an innate love of a good story. It needs to ramble a bit. It needs to have a host of characters, and some of them need to be a little bit crazy. Most of the characters need to be recognizable as neighbors and family. The situation should have a slightly unbelievable twist. Lee Smith has woven another good story here. It’ll warm your heart like an Alabama summer.

[Linda Hicks · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding

This is a well-written book with lots of humor and also very thought-provoking. I would recommend this as one of the top ten books I've read throughout my life. I can't wait for the sequel!

[Linda Cunningham · Rating 5 out of 5]

Listen!

This story is a reminder that we should always listen to the children. We so often shush them when we should let them speak. If someone... Anyone...had listened to Oliver, much trouble would have been averted. He tried so hard to tell what really happened, but no one would Listen.
A good story.

[Lorinda · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow!!!

What a great tale
Mesmerizing. Very well written
The characters are engaging ! Best read of my year
Looking forward to seeing more of Mr Smith's work

[Kathleen · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great read!

I loved this book because I love books about small town life in the South. The book was well written and the characters well developed. I also read the other book in the series and hope Mr. Smith will write more.

[Diane Nelms · Rating 5 out of 5]

Enjoyed reading this very much. Loved the way he switched back and forth from the boy to the narrator. If he writes more books, I would like to know so I can read them.

[Pat · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heartwarming and funny

Oliver wants his town back. The one where he rides his bike from one grandmother's house to the other and his uncles aren't in jail.
Humorous, charming look at life in a small Southern town.
I really enjoyed the writing style, although there were quite a few typos, which distract.
There is a sequel, which I plan to start today.

[Ron Porter · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a fun read!!!

[Cindy · Rating 5 out of 5]

What a fun read!

I called my sister cause the author must have been a ghost in our house. I too refused to wring a chicken neck. Hah I was so mad at my mother ! There's some things a girl just can't do. Loved the book. It was a delightful laugh out loud book. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Can't wait to read the next book.

[Jane Pritts · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lot of fun.... laughed out loud several times

[Debbie Ebert · Rating 5 out of 5]

Opp

Very well told. Several side stories to keep it interesting. Almost seemed true when Lake Gantt was mentioned. Lee Smith captured the humans condition inherit to all of us.

[Elizabeth Rowe · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great read!

Well written. I enjoyed getting to know each of the characters and how they impacted Oliver’s life. Oliver’s perseverance emulates how we should all approach life. Stand up for what is right. Kindness and truth win in the end.

[Ken · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a fun read. Parts of it gave me a good laugh, including several digs at Auburn and its fans, but mixed in with all that were some really nice family moments and wise observations about life and values. Oh, and, Roll Tide.

[Bonnie Smith · Rating 1 out of 5]

This was the worst book I’ve ever read, overly drawn out tale of what could have been, at best, acute short story. I’m an avid adult reader. This book is made for very young teens. If it belongs anywhere, it’s in the ( very) young adult section at best.

[Michael G. Degnan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I completely loved this book. It captures small southern town in the 60’s. It is hilarious at times and poignant at other times. This novel would make an incredible movie. I am told there is another book coming out which I am very eager to read. Excellent story telling.

[James I. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book…reminded me of how the simple things in life can be fun to read about. The author has a unique style to his writing. Would like to get him to read at our book club.

[Kristen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’ll give it cute and it had potential but what it really needed was an editor.

[April Cullom · Rating 4 out of 5]

Cute and funny book but I wish there had been less language. Obviously the title kind of gives that away but I think it could have been just as good a story without the language.