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Scars
Kendra must face her past and stop hurting herself—before it's too late....
An edgy, realistic, and hopeful novel about a teen survivor of sexual abuse who uses self-harm to cope.
Kendra, fifteen, hasn't felt safe since she began to recall devastating memories of childhood sexual abuse, especially because she still can't remember the most important detail – her abuser's identity. Frightened, Kendra believes someone is always watching and following her, leaving menacing messages only she understands. If she lets her guard down even for a minute, it could cost Kendra her life. To relieve the pressure, Kendra cuts; aside from her brilliantly expressive artwork, it's her only way of coping. Since her own mother is too self-absorbed to hear her cries for help, Kendra finds support in others instead: from her therapist and her art teacher, from Sandy, the close family friend who encourages her artwork, and from Meghan, the classmate who's becoming a friend and maybe more. But the truth about Kendra's abuse is just waiting to explode, with startling unforeseen consequences. SCARS is the unforgettable story of one girl's frightening path to the truth.
An edgy, realistic, and hopeful novel about a teen survivor of sexual abuse who uses self-harm to cope.
Kendra, fifteen, hasn't felt safe since she began to recall devastating memories of childhood sexual abuse, especially because she still can't remember the most important detail – her abuser's identity. Frightened, Kendra believes someone is always watching and following her, leaving menacing messages only she understands. If she lets her guard down even for a minute, it could cost Kendra her life. To relieve the pressure, Kendra cuts; aside from her brilliantly expressive artwork, it's her only way of coping. Since her own mother is too self-absorbed to hear her cries for help, Kendra finds support in others instead: from her therapist and her art teacher, from Sandy, the close family friend who encourages her artwork, and from Meghan, the classmate who's becoming a friend and maybe more. But the truth about Kendra's abuse is just waiting to explode, with startling unforeseen consequences. SCARS is the unforgettable story of one girl's frightening path to the truth.
250 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 24, 2010
513 people are currently reading
44047 people want to read
About the author
Cheryl Rainfield
12 books652 followersCheryl Rainfield is a queer, nonbinary lesbian award-winning author of SCARS, a Governor General Literary Award finalist, YALSA's Top 10 Quick Pick For Reluctant Readers, Rainbow Project List, Staff Pick for Teaching Tolerance, and which has frequently been banned by the far-right; and award-winning HUNTED and STAINED. They are also a cult torture survivor who writes strong girls and nonbinary teens
who save themselves; queer characters; and characters who overcome trauma.
And yes, it is their own arm on the cover of SCARS.
If you loved SCARS, you may want to get their free 38-page SCARS short story that picks up where SCARS left off by signing up for their author newsletter at www.CherylRainfield.com
who save themselves; queer characters; and characters who overcome trauma.
And yes, it is their own arm on the cover of SCARS.
If you loved SCARS, you may want to get their free 38-page SCARS short story that picks up where SCARS left off by signing up for their author newsletter at www.CherylRainfield.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,254 reviews
March 10, 2012
I don't hide the fact that I'm a rape victim - or that I used to be a self-mutilator (still am, depending on who you are and how you define SM - I cope now with tattoos and body piercing because it's safer than slashing up my arms or legs. It allows me to take something that makes me feel awful and turn it into art, but that doesn't always sit well with everyone else. Truth be told, I stopped cutting because I found out that one of my friends cut as well - and he scared me into turning the situation into something that really did help me cope without risking my life).
I don't talk about it very often because I have problems discussing these topics, but I do read a lot of writing about both subjects. And, very often, I find that the fictional books aren't very realistic. They try to gloss over the bad parts and make everything hunky-dory at the end. Not so with this book. The author doesn't gloss over the pain and, while things do end on a more positive note, I wasn't given the impression that Kendra's life will just be A-okay now. She still has problems on the road ahead of her. She still has good days and bad days, but she's going to get through them because she's a survivor. And I love that ending because it gives hope to people like me. So I have to give the author kudos - she did something very rare and I hope this book helps other kids who find themselves in a similar situation.
Too often, the people around me have a hard time understanding what I'm going through - from now on, I'll recommend this book to them and let it show them.
I don't talk about it very often because I have problems discussing these topics, but I do read a lot of writing about both subjects. And, very often, I find that the fictional books aren't very realistic. They try to gloss over the bad parts and make everything hunky-dory at the end. Not so with this book. The author doesn't gloss over the pain and, while things do end on a more positive note, I wasn't given the impression that Kendra's life will just be A-okay now. She still has problems on the road ahead of her. She still has good days and bad days, but she's going to get through them because she's a survivor. And I love that ending because it gives hope to people like me. So I have to give the author kudos - she did something very rare and I hope this book helps other kids who find themselves in a similar situation.
Too often, the people around me have a hard time understanding what I'm going through - from now on, I'll recommend this book to them and let it show them.
February 27, 2022
Scars by Cheryl Rainfield, narrated by Emily Bauer Audible Original, is the most personal and epic journey of personal pain and things suppressed in memory that the victim couldn't face herself first. Secondly, it happened to be a trick to survive that our brains play with us. This book is an excellent source of strength and ability to transform pain into something beautiful like artwork; however, it is not what happens when the pain of emotional, physical abuse is so unbearable that only cut and bleed help, to feel some form of release from the clams.
This book is an excellent example that therapy can save a life.
This book is an excellent example that therapy can save a life.
June 6, 2012
I don't usually read this type of book but it was Amazon's free download of the day, so I gave it a shot. It was...okay.
Summary: Kendra cuts herself to ease the terrifying fear that overwhelms her as she tries to cope with memories of the sexual abuse she endured for years. Flashes of a man's hairy hands clutching her, his voice telling her he will kill her if she tells haunt her, and she is sure she could remember the identity of her abuser if she tried, but she is too afraid to allow herself that knowledge. Lately, she has felt someone following her, and now threatening notes and "gifts" are appearing in her locker and bookbag. She fears she'll be killed if she remembers her abuser's identity, and especially if she reveals that identity to someone else.
Kendra attempts to cope with this personal horror through two things: therapy, and her artwork. Her therapist, Carolyn, is exceedingly kind, patient, and understanding. Their sessions provide a safe place for memories and emotions. Kendra is artistically gifted, and when she allows the art to flow the images are harsh and striking representations of her abuse. Her artist mother is critical, though. She tells Kendra no one will buy that kind of artwork; she wants her to paint "happy" images people will enjoy. Kendra never shows her mother her paintings anymore.
Kendra's father is loving and kind but is going through financial difficulties due to cutbacks at work. He may be forced to move his family to the suburbs, where the cost of living is lower. Kendra can't let that happen. If they move, she won't be able to have sessions with Carolyn anymore.
And then there's Meghan. Kendra doesn't feel so alone anymore now that she's met Meghan. In fact, she may even be in love with Meghan. (There's another reason for Mom to be critical of Kendra; she's opposed to Kendra's homosexual life choice.) She just can't move away and leave Meghan.
Kendra is tortured by constant memories of her abuse. When the pain is too intense, when she can't reach Carolyn by phone, when "his" threats are too real, she turns--no, she runs to cutting. Cutting allows the fear to bleed out. She believes she needs to cut in order to survive.
My Thoughts: Not exceptionally well-written. I predicted the identity of the abuser (but certainly not the way it played out) pretty early on. I totally buy that the author was writing from personal experience, because this felt like someone trying to tell her own story. But it seemed choppy and the ending was far too rushed and far too "happily ever after". It seemed unrealistic--Kendra's abuser is identified (quite dramatically, I will say) and taken away and suddenly she's pretty much fine with her life?
After what this family experienced, things were sorted out too quickly. A mother who failed to see on her own any hint of what was happening, who chose to ignore her child's pleas for help, who has been in denial for 13 years, suddenly accepts everything because of one horrific night? This woman should have been in shock over the events she witnessed. I expected her to remain in denial even after what she saw, but she seemed to handle everything just fine, and even embraced her daughter's lesbian girlfriend as one of the family just a few short weeks later. Not realistic. At least not to me. I honestly expected a terrible, dramatic betrayal or twist at the very end. It didn't come, and I suppose that was good, but the ending still felt too "all wrapped up" for me.
Now, I have no idea what it feels like to deal with these issues. None. So it may be fair to say I'm not qualified to make this kind of judgment. It may be fair to say that the only people who can truly appreciate a book like this are those who have lived through something similar. I couldn't say. This book was dramatic, intense at times, and occasionally compelling, but for me, not enough to elevate it above mediocrity. I have no doubt it will be therapeutic for some readers, intensely touching to others. It's just not for me.
Summary: Kendra cuts herself to ease the terrifying fear that overwhelms her as she tries to cope with memories of the sexual abuse she endured for years. Flashes of a man's hairy hands clutching her, his voice telling her he will kill her if she tells haunt her, and she is sure she could remember the identity of her abuser if she tried, but she is too afraid to allow herself that knowledge. Lately, she has felt someone following her, and now threatening notes and "gifts" are appearing in her locker and bookbag. She fears she'll be killed if she remembers her abuser's identity, and especially if she reveals that identity to someone else.
Kendra attempts to cope with this personal horror through two things: therapy, and her artwork. Her therapist, Carolyn, is exceedingly kind, patient, and understanding. Their sessions provide a safe place for memories and emotions. Kendra is artistically gifted, and when she allows the art to flow the images are harsh and striking representations of her abuse. Her artist mother is critical, though. She tells Kendra no one will buy that kind of artwork; she wants her to paint "happy" images people will enjoy. Kendra never shows her mother her paintings anymore.
Kendra's father is loving and kind but is going through financial difficulties due to cutbacks at work. He may be forced to move his family to the suburbs, where the cost of living is lower. Kendra can't let that happen. If they move, she won't be able to have sessions with Carolyn anymore.
And then there's Meghan. Kendra doesn't feel so alone anymore now that she's met Meghan. In fact, she may even be in love with Meghan. (There's another reason for Mom to be critical of Kendra; she's opposed to Kendra's homosexual life choice.) She just can't move away and leave Meghan.
Kendra is tortured by constant memories of her abuse. When the pain is too intense, when she can't reach Carolyn by phone, when "his" threats are too real, she turns--no, she runs to cutting. Cutting allows the fear to bleed out. She believes she needs to cut in order to survive.
My Thoughts: Not exceptionally well-written. I predicted the identity of the abuser (but certainly not the way it played out) pretty early on. I totally buy that the author was writing from personal experience, because this felt like someone trying to tell her own story. But it seemed choppy and the ending was far too rushed and far too "happily ever after". It seemed unrealistic--Kendra's abuser is identified (quite dramatically, I will say) and taken away and suddenly she's pretty much fine with her life?
After what this family experienced, things were sorted out too quickly. A mother who failed to see on her own any hint of what was happening, who chose to ignore her child's pleas for help, who has been in denial for 13 years, suddenly accepts everything because of one horrific night? This woman should have been in shock over the events she witnessed. I expected her to remain in denial even after what she saw, but she seemed to handle everything just fine, and even embraced her daughter's lesbian girlfriend as one of the family just a few short weeks later. Not realistic. At least not to me. I honestly expected a terrible, dramatic betrayal or twist at the very end. It didn't come, and I suppose that was good, but the ending still felt too "all wrapped up" for me.
Now, I have no idea what it feels like to deal with these issues. None. So it may be fair to say I'm not qualified to make this kind of judgment. It may be fair to say that the only people who can truly appreciate a book like this are those who have lived through something similar. I couldn't say. This book was dramatic, intense at times, and occasionally compelling, but for me, not enough to elevate it above mediocrity. I have no doubt it will be therapeutic for some readers, intensely touching to others. It's just not for me.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
August 8, 2012
I haven't read too many abuse/self-harm-related books, but out of the very few I know this is by far the best. It started off perfectly and really dropped you in the midst of all the drama and heartache. Even though I may not be able to understand fully, Rainfield does an excellent job at painting characters with powerful words. You can tell, even from the first paragraph, that the author knows by experience what she is writing about. I think that feat makes this read all the more meaningful. The story line was somewhat abstract, in a way that not only one problem is discussed, but many. Most of these problems are what we're facing today--sexual orientation, depression, and religion. It's just great to see someone get it RIGHT. There was no vagueness or holding of the tongue, Cheryl was very blunt.
Kendra was so special to me, partially because she was so much like me in certain aspects. But her will to be different, to strive, is what made me really fall in love with her character and personality. She's easy to love, and most of all, your heart just kind of weeps for her. Throughout the book, I felt myself wanting to help her, to comfort her. That's a big accomplishment on Rainfield's half. I was very pleased with the ending as well. Though I don't think I could have ever forgiven Kendra's mother, it made for a sweet ending.
If you are looking for a heartfelt read with a tinge of mystery and love, this is a book to pick up.
Kendra was so special to me, partially because she was so much like me in certain aspects. But her will to be different, to strive, is what made me really fall in love with her character and personality. She's easy to love, and most of all, your heart just kind of weeps for her. Throughout the book, I felt myself wanting to help her, to comfort her. That's a big accomplishment on Rainfield's half. I was very pleased with the ending as well. Though I don't think I could have ever forgiven Kendra's mother, it made for a sweet ending.
If you are looking for a heartfelt read with a tinge of mystery and love, this is a book to pick up.
May 28, 2012
Okay. Most importantly I must make this confession. I walked into this book *really* wanting to like it. The cover is insanely eye-catching, especially for a teen in trouble. Cutting is somewhat of a personal project of mine. I'm always looking for emotionally therapeutic books to shove in the hands of needy kids.
But there were just so many Fails hidden within a great story that I spent most of the time shaking my head.
Kendra is fifteen and she's recovered memories of sexual abuse as a child. The problem is, she can't identify the abuser, so she's in this awful place of questioning every close man in her life. As if that wasn't horrific enough, her predator begins leaving threatening notes in her school bag reminder her what will happen if she tells.
Kendra sees a therapist, who she wishes was her mother, because her mom is self-absorbed and pretty much a big wimp. Kendra is an artist like her mom and using her artwork to unleash these inside fears. And in this process she meets Meghan. Meghan has her own issues so they lean on each other.
Let me stop here. Because that's pretty much the summary of an intriguing book. And I want to shake and shout to someone that it truly COULD have been if there weren't so many moments where I wanted to throw it across the room. (I did not because I was reading from my IPad. Had it been the three-dimensional book, I probably would have).
The Frustrations
1. Kendra is seeing a therapist. Her LIFE is being threatened. No one calls the police? Um, yeah. Not gonna happen. And if it did, then you've got a pretty messed up therapist because she's got her own issues. There are rules in place. Very specific rules. Especially with minors. This isn't a session where a kid is getting nasty notes from their ex-bestie. A predator has already raped a minor. Where's the logic folks?
2. Kendra meets Meghan. Two minutes later Kendra is in love with Meghan. Seriously? I work with kids. I know how quickly they fall in and out of love, but the writing of this? So unbelievable.
3. Which leads me to the writing. I hate to put this out there because I know every author's work is a part of them but there were so many things going on and little time spent investigating any of it. I felt as though I was suppose to just accept that Meghan was a messed up kid who slept around but after ONE DATE with Kendra she is 100% committed. Sorry. There was no development there.
4. Which leads me to the confession that Meghan makes: I sleep with lots of boys because I don't care about them and it allows me to not deal with the fact that I like girls. Okay. This is HUGE. How I wish this was fleshed out more rather than just glossed over.
5. Can I go back to the therapist? This is really bugging me guys. I made some difficult decisions about confidentiality when I saw clients and that was all under supervision. That's what training is for. Red flag.
Bottom line is there were so many things about this book that could have been brilliant. Seriously. Like, the way the author shows Kendra freaked out by her teacher (among others), asking herself is that the voice? is that the hand? Oh and how Kendra uses her artwork to express herself? Hell to the yah. It just lacked follow through.
February 26, 2025
Boring. Predictable. And juvenile writing.
Story and plot could’ve been really good but this wasn’t it for me.
Story and plot could’ve been really good but this wasn’t it for me.
June 11, 2018
The writing style is just awful and insta-love crap kinda ruined the whole story for me.
May 16, 2012
I can think of several students to whom I would give this novel.
I would have preferred if there had been a little more in terms of character development. The relationship between Meghan and Kendra happened very quickly - a little too quickly to be entirely believable. Kendra's mother seemed one-dimensional, but whether that was a deliberate choice due to the first-person narration or due to an oversight is unclear.
All of those little problems aside, the book IS gripping. It is also very telling in terms of why people cut themselves. I liked that the author allowed Kendra to acknowledge that she may cut again in the future. Cutting is not something that a person simply stops.
I know this is an important topic. I'm pleased that it was written in such an empathetic and accessible style; young adults who need the support this novel offers will be provided the ability to negotiate the language and structure. Readers will sympathize with the horror of Kendra's past and the reality of her present. Those who see themselves in Kendra will, hopefully, hold on to the hope the novel offers in its conclusion.
One for my classroom library for sure (and an extra copy for my school counsellor!).
I would have preferred if there had been a little more in terms of character development. The relationship between Meghan and Kendra happened very quickly - a little too quickly to be entirely believable. Kendra's mother seemed one-dimensional, but whether that was a deliberate choice due to the first-person narration or due to an oversight is unclear.
All of those little problems aside, the book IS gripping. It is also very telling in terms of why people cut themselves. I liked that the author allowed Kendra to acknowledge that she may cut again in the future. Cutting is not something that a person simply stops.
I know this is an important topic. I'm pleased that it was written in such an empathetic and accessible style; young adults who need the support this novel offers will be provided the ability to negotiate the language and structure. Readers will sympathize with the horror of Kendra's past and the reality of her present. Those who see themselves in Kendra will, hopefully, hold on to the hope the novel offers in its conclusion.
One for my classroom library for sure (and an extra copy for my school counsellor!).
June 14, 2013
Book Info: Genre: Young Adult literature
Reading Level: Young Adult with the caveat that this addresses serious issues; readers should have someone to whom they can turn for assistance with any issues that it brings up. Some of the abuse scenes are very graphic and very disturbing.
Recommended for: Anyone who can read it
Trigger Warnings: Child molestation/incest (very graphic scenes), cutting (graphic), homophobia, suicidal ideation, child abuse and neglect, assault with a deadly weapon, ritual abuse
My Thoughts: Wow, this book is brutal: absolutely brutal. Not only is Kendra trying to survive the memories of her abuse as a child, but she's also coming to grips with being a lesbian and dealing with the ignorance of her family. They try to be accepting, but keep saying things like, “If you choose to be a lesbian, you're choosing a hard road.” People just can't seem to understand it is not a choice! I mean, who in their right mind would choose to live with the sort of hatred and discrimination that people in the QUILTBAG have to deal with? No, it's the way a person is born, nothing to do with any choice. The only correct thing about that statement is the “hard road” bit. I was very happy that a) Kendra figured it out so young and b) she had a friend of the family who was gay that would support and encourage her.
Cheryl Rainfield has said, “I write the books that I needed as a teen.” She also writes the extremely hard and brutal truth. She digs so deeply into the head of the abused Kendra that I felt like I needed a shower after reading some of the things that poor child went through.
While the book is brutal and disturbing, it's also very well-written. I just realized, after finishing it, that I didn't notice a single editing error. I couldn't tell you if that was because they weren't there or I just didn't notice them; I was absolutely enthralled by this story. It was hard to read, but … I really can't recommend it enough. If you can stand to read it, you really should.
Disclosure: I picked up this book from Amazon during a free promotion. All opinions are my own.
Synopsis: Kendra, fifteen, hasn't felt safe since she began to recall devastating memories of childhood sexual abuse, especially because she still can't remember the most important detail—her abuser's identity. Frightened, Kendra believes someone is always watching and following her, leaving menacing messages only she understands. If she lets her guard down even for a minute, it could cost Kendra her life. To relieve the pressure, Kendra cuts; aside from her brilliantly expressive artwork, it's her only way of coping. Since her own mother is too self-absorbed to hear her cries for help, Kendra finds support in others instead: from her therapist and her art teacher, from Sandy, the close family friend who encourages her artwork, and from Meghan, the classmate who's becoming a friend and maybe more. But the truth about Kendra's abuse is just waiting to explode, with startling unforeseen consequences. Scars is the unforgettable story of one girl's frightening path to the truth.
Reading Level: Young Adult with the caveat that this addresses serious issues; readers should have someone to whom they can turn for assistance with any issues that it brings up. Some of the abuse scenes are very graphic and very disturbing.
Recommended for: Anyone who can read it
Trigger Warnings: Child molestation/incest (very graphic scenes), cutting (graphic), homophobia, suicidal ideation, child abuse and neglect, assault with a deadly weapon, ritual abuse
My Thoughts: Wow, this book is brutal: absolutely brutal. Not only is Kendra trying to survive the memories of her abuse as a child, but she's also coming to grips with being a lesbian and dealing with the ignorance of her family. They try to be accepting, but keep saying things like, “If you choose to be a lesbian, you're choosing a hard road.” People just can't seem to understand it is not a choice! I mean, who in their right mind would choose to live with the sort of hatred and discrimination that people in the QUILTBAG have to deal with? No, it's the way a person is born, nothing to do with any choice. The only correct thing about that statement is the “hard road” bit. I was very happy that a) Kendra figured it out so young and b) she had a friend of the family who was gay that would support and encourage her.
Cheryl Rainfield has said, “I write the books that I needed as a teen.” She also writes the extremely hard and brutal truth. She digs so deeply into the head of the abused Kendra that I felt like I needed a shower after reading some of the things that poor child went through.
While the book is brutal and disturbing, it's also very well-written. I just realized, after finishing it, that I didn't notice a single editing error. I couldn't tell you if that was because they weren't there or I just didn't notice them; I was absolutely enthralled by this story. It was hard to read, but … I really can't recommend it enough. If you can stand to read it, you really should.
Disclosure: I picked up this book from Amazon during a free promotion. All opinions are my own.
Synopsis: Kendra, fifteen, hasn't felt safe since she began to recall devastating memories of childhood sexual abuse, especially because she still can't remember the most important detail—her abuser's identity. Frightened, Kendra believes someone is always watching and following her, leaving menacing messages only she understands. If she lets her guard down even for a minute, it could cost Kendra her life. To relieve the pressure, Kendra cuts; aside from her brilliantly expressive artwork, it's her only way of coping. Since her own mother is too self-absorbed to hear her cries for help, Kendra finds support in others instead: from her therapist and her art teacher, from Sandy, the close family friend who encourages her artwork, and from Meghan, the classmate who's becoming a friend and maybe more. But the truth about Kendra's abuse is just waiting to explode, with startling unforeseen consequences. Scars is the unforgettable story of one girl's frightening path to the truth.
July 1, 2012
How do I start a review on a book that tackles some very tough subjects with its heart in the right place, but doesn't execute them very well? I can't speak for Cheryl Rainfield's experiences, nor would I try to take away from her telling a story in such a mode, but "Scars" was a rough read on a number of scales, none of which I would say were done that well when considering several transitional aspects of the storyline. It's more of a mechanistic part of the story rather than the issues it chooses to tackle. Fair warning, this book is quite graphic and may potentially trigger some who have been through rape and/or mentalities associated with cutting, but I do applaud that Rainfield chooses to not mince words when it comes to the experiences of her protagonist. I actually thought the writing was fine, easy to read and go through with respect to events, but the way those events seemed to come across with gigantic plot holes and some exorbitant amounts of drama were the thing that took away from my enjoyment of the book.
It frustrated me because I saw what the story wanted to do, but the execution didn't deliver for the weight it bore. However, there are some aspects of it I can look back upon and say I liked. I think it takes a tremendous amount of bravery to be able to talk about overcoming experiences with rape, struggles with cutting, and coming to terms with one's sexuality and finding happiness beyond the pain. However, I felt thrown out of the story multiple times because there were events that didn't add up well, plot transitions that were quite awkward, and threads left dangling even after the story concluded.
"Scars" revolves around a young woman named Kendra, who attends therapy sessions regarding her experiences with being raped as a child, and not recalling her attacker's identity. Not only that, her attacker was the one who taught/manipulated her into cutting to relieve the pain. It takes the intervention of a friend turned lover (Meghan), an art teacher, and Kendra's therapist to help Kendra through her pains and overcome not only the cutting, but also the block in her memory as to the identity of her rapist.
By far, the most rewarding aspects of this book were Kendra finding ways to heal through her art, and Kendra's developing relationship with Meghan. Granted, Meghan is not a big part of the book when compared to some of the events, but the interactions between them were refreshing to watch. Also, Kendra's art teacher provides a gentle, encouraging hand in developing her talent and giving Kendra a venue to express her grief. I enjoyed those aspects very much.
I felt Kendra and her mother's relationship was palpable and difficult (sometimes even boiling my blood at the exchanges), but to see some of the levels it reached and how easily it was resolved at the end left a sour taste in my mouth. Nothing in the grasp of reality is ever resolved that easily when it comes to the issues that Kendra suffered with and the measure of the relationships she had. It was tied up far too neatly, especially considering the identity of the rapist.
I was not surprised by the identity of the rapist when it was revealed, but it felt like such a leap considering some of the details given in the book. We're given some devices that are supposed to lead to whom the rapist might be - considering the threats like the note, the mp3 player with the distorted voice, and the horrific "present" that Kendra receives that nearly sends her over the edge. Yet, when the reveal's made, none of those points are tied together to give the story cohesion, and it seems like the rapist's personality does a 180 from how he was portrayed in Kendra's eyes initially. I understand that Kendra was manipulated to some extent, but I found it hard to believe that she couldn't identify her rapist earlier given some plot details that didn't add up to that mentality.
I wish I could've liked the story a bit better than its portrayal, but I think for how this story kept me reading, I wouldn't discount looking into this author's other and future works, just to see how she improves upon it and if the story strikes me a bit better in her respective stylistics.
Overall score: 2/5
Note: I received this as an ARC from NetGalley, from the publisher WestSide Books.
It frustrated me because I saw what the story wanted to do, but the execution didn't deliver for the weight it bore. However, there are some aspects of it I can look back upon and say I liked. I think it takes a tremendous amount of bravery to be able to talk about overcoming experiences with rape, struggles with cutting, and coming to terms with one's sexuality and finding happiness beyond the pain. However, I felt thrown out of the story multiple times because there were events that didn't add up well, plot transitions that were quite awkward, and threads left dangling even after the story concluded.
"Scars" revolves around a young woman named Kendra, who attends therapy sessions regarding her experiences with being raped as a child, and not recalling her attacker's identity. Not only that, her attacker was the one who taught/manipulated her into cutting to relieve the pain. It takes the intervention of a friend turned lover (Meghan), an art teacher, and Kendra's therapist to help Kendra through her pains and overcome not only the cutting, but also the block in her memory as to the identity of her rapist.
By far, the most rewarding aspects of this book were Kendra finding ways to heal through her art, and Kendra's developing relationship with Meghan. Granted, Meghan is not a big part of the book when compared to some of the events, but the interactions between them were refreshing to watch. Also, Kendra's art teacher provides a gentle, encouraging hand in developing her talent and giving Kendra a venue to express her grief. I enjoyed those aspects very much.
I felt Kendra and her mother's relationship was palpable and difficult (sometimes even boiling my blood at the exchanges), but to see some of the levels it reached and how easily it was resolved at the end left a sour taste in my mouth. Nothing in the grasp of reality is ever resolved that easily when it comes to the issues that Kendra suffered with and the measure of the relationships she had. It was tied up far too neatly, especially considering the identity of the rapist.
I was not surprised by the identity of the rapist when it was revealed, but it felt like such a leap considering some of the details given in the book. We're given some devices that are supposed to lead to whom the rapist might be - considering the threats like the note, the mp3 player with the distorted voice, and the horrific "present" that Kendra receives that nearly sends her over the edge. Yet, when the reveal's made, none of those points are tied together to give the story cohesion, and it seems like the rapist's personality does a 180 from how he was portrayed in Kendra's eyes initially. I understand that Kendra was manipulated to some extent, but I found it hard to believe that she couldn't identify her rapist earlier given some plot details that didn't add up to that mentality.
I wish I could've liked the story a bit better than its portrayal, but I think for how this story kept me reading, I wouldn't discount looking into this author's other and future works, just to see how she improves upon it and if the story strikes me a bit better in her respective stylistics.
Overall score: 2/5
Note: I received this as an ARC from NetGalley, from the publisher WestSide Books.
October 11, 2010
This has got to be the GREATEST book I've ever read! This book is one I could never put down. There are twists you wouldn't expect, the discripitons pull you in to the pain and emotion, the author wrote it perfectly for my tastes in books. I can't stress enough how good this book is. I've recommended it to a few hundred, how are very interseted, and can't wait to read it. Look out DeBarger, here they come!
This book caused me to be forced into her feelings and surroundings. I felt her pain and misery throughout the book. Scars is realistic, for the most part, and very enjoyable. Kendra has hidden memories and try to solve her abusers identity. Kendra is very biggety and very well at keeping everybody out of her mind. Cheryl Rainfield has thrown in suspence and intense scense that are heart stopping. READ SCARS!!!!
This book caused me to be forced into her feelings and surroundings. I felt her pain and misery throughout the book. Scars is realistic, for the most part, and very enjoyable. Kendra has hidden memories and try to solve her abusers identity. Kendra is very biggety and very well at keeping everybody out of her mind. Cheryl Rainfield has thrown in suspence and intense scense that are heart stopping. READ SCARS!!!!
April 18, 2010
This is a powerful, potent book that will leave you feeling twisted and flayed because this book not only dives into the horrific world of child sexual abuse, it throws in cutting. Each facet stands out, shining as brightly as its counterpart without either overtaking the other. There are books I could compare this to because they have similar subject matter- books that deal with sexual abuse and ones for cutting but rarely any that combine the two. That, alone, makes this book thrust itself forward. Even more notably is the somewhat autobiographical nature of it and knowing that, this book surged into me even more deeply because although it is fiction, there is obvious proof at least parts of this are based on a dark reality. Books like this can often blur the fiction/nonfiction line and this one toes it expertly, pulling the reader in and making them feel every bit of pain Kendra did- pain the author felt at one point.
For Kendra, cutting is her way of forgetting and dealing with the memories of being sexually abused as a child- her way of not remembering the face of the person who did it because that could be worse than remembering in the first place. Kendra can't say when the abuse started or when it stopped, she can't say what person did it to her- someone her family had to know given she was a young child, but she can say that it happened, she remembers parts, and it was horrific. She isn't cutting to kill herself- she's cutting because she has no other way of letting out the intense pain she feels. Rainfield does an exceptional job making this distinction and luring the reader into an understanding that while cutting is a tabooed outlet, it's an outlet for a reason. While it isn't necessarily okay, it's needed- and this book stresses that.
Also making this book stand out is how much it touches on homophobia. With not only a main character that seems to be drawn more to girls than boys- one girl in particular named Meghan- but also a strong adult male character who's gay and has a partner, this book pushes the boundaries and stresses acceptance. Acceptance of those lesbians and gays, acceptance of cutters, and acceptance of those who have suffered something so traumatic they don't know how to deal and need things to happen their way for awhile. Explanation and justification without promotion.
The plot, while initially simplistic based on the summary, is filled with twists, turns and shocking moments. Yes, the person who abused Kendra is identified and there's a point where it becomes obvious who it is- but that is about the same time Kendra starts to remember. Before that, she naturally questions any man who's been in her life long enough, taking the reader right along for the ride. While Kendra is cutting and trying to hide it, and fighting to remember, she has to deal with her parents who are as stunned as she is about the abuse. Typical teenage battles become wars almost because of the dark cloud hanging over this family, all at the hands of an unknown assailant that tormented their little girl.
Rainfield does a magnificent job building all her characters, from Kendra to her parents to Meghan and Kendra's much needed and very trusted therapist Carolyn. Each of these characters becomes a full person, realistic in the mind of the reader and made stronger by the very raw way in which Rainfield pitches Kendra, her thoughts, and her story.
I read this one straight through in one evening, gripped and pulled in from the very first page. Rainfield has done something wonderful with this novel despite the very dark, harsh topic. I highly, highly recommend it even if parts are rough to read. It will stick with you, it will make you rethink some things, and it will keep the notion that sexual abuse can happen to anyone, at any time in your mind.
January 30, 2021
Kendra cuts herself to relieve the anxiety of remembering sexual abuse by an unknown perpetrator. With the help of a caring therapist, an encouraging art teacher and a new friend, she strugglers to remember who hurt her, among fears that she's being followed by the perpetrator.
SCARS is a realistic portrayal of a young girl struggling to deal with her past, while trying to figure out who she is in the present. Cheryl Rainfield, a former cutter, draws from her own personal experiences as a victim to create a realistic character in Kendra, and while the circumstances surrounding her abuse are probably different than most readers can imagine, the feelings surrounding Cheryl's reaction to her abuse and her healing will ring true to other survivors. Rainfield has a very engaging, readable, and relatable style of storytelling that will draw both adults and teens to her novels.
ETA: the audiobook is well done too.
SCARS is a realistic portrayal of a young girl struggling to deal with her past, while trying to figure out who she is in the present. Cheryl Rainfield, a former cutter, draws from her own personal experiences as a victim to create a realistic character in Kendra, and while the circumstances surrounding her abuse are probably different than most readers can imagine, the feelings surrounding Cheryl's reaction to her abuse and her healing will ring true to other survivors. Rainfield has a very engaging, readable, and relatable style of storytelling that will draw both adults and teens to her novels.
ETA: the audiobook is well done too.
July 24, 2018
2,5
Poorly written story about serious topics.
Poorly written story about serious topics.
September 30, 2013
I have been meaning to read this books for years now. But, somehow, never got to it. Thankfully, I finally picked up this amazing story of facing and overcoming your fears, of accepting yourself, of having strenght to love again and being loved. Kendra touched my heart very deeply.
Scars is very powerful book. The author, Cheryl Rainfield, is a former cutter and an abuse survivor, and that fact makes Scars even more chilling than it would have been otherwise. The story is so real that I did not want to put the book down, I read it all in one sitting, and I was not disappointed. It's fast-paced, suspenseful, educational, and most of all, emotional. I loved the author's use of art as a language, I loved also the mystery surrounding the abuser and I loved her therapist Carolyn. I admire Kendra the most because of her strength and determination, most of all I admire her strenght to move on and to forgive her ignorant mother after all the bad things that happend to her. Scars isn´t just book about pain, to me, it´s about coping and recovery.
This is a must read. Jaw dropping book. It is heartwrenching. It will never leave you.
Scars is very powerful book. The author, Cheryl Rainfield, is a former cutter and an abuse survivor, and that fact makes Scars even more chilling than it would have been otherwise. The story is so real that I did not want to put the book down, I read it all in one sitting, and I was not disappointed. It's fast-paced, suspenseful, educational, and most of all, emotional. I loved the author's use of art as a language, I loved also the mystery surrounding the abuser and I loved her therapist Carolyn. I admire Kendra the most because of her strength and determination, most of all I admire her strenght to move on and to forgive her ignorant mother after all the bad things that happend to her. Scars isn´t just book about pain, to me, it´s about coping and recovery.
This is a must read. Jaw dropping book. It is heartwrenching. It will never leave you.
April 22, 2017
Kendra is a fifteen year old talented artist who cuts to help deal with her painful memories of being raped as a child. She attends therapy sessions which help her deal with her trauma. With the help of her therapist Carolyn, her art teacher Mrs. Archer and her only friend (also the love interest) Meghan, and cutting, Kendra is able to heal and cope.
This book was okay for me but there were things that I really did not like.
The insta love. You only just met the girl. How can you be in love?
"'I'm not mad,' I say softly. 'I can wait as long as it takes.'
And I can.
Because I love her."
*Cringes*
The relationship between Kendra and her mother was annoying and difficult. I did not like Kendra's mother. I found their relationship quite annoying. At times I wanted to throw the book and rip out all the pages. Especially when Kendra told her mother the identity of her rapist and the way her mother reacted made me want to punch someone.
I have got to say though, the ending left me shocked. I seriously had no idea about the identity of the rapist.
I am glad things turned out better for Kendra and she found her happy ending with Meghan and I am glad Meghan also found happiness. (She goes through shit at home too .-.)
I liked Stained better than this book.
Sandy is cute and he is mine. ;-;
This book was okay for me but there were things that I really did not like.
The insta love. You only just met the girl. How can you be in love?
"'I'm not mad,' I say softly. 'I can wait as long as it takes.'
And I can.
Because I love her."
*Cringes*
The relationship between Kendra and her mother was annoying and difficult. I did not like Kendra's mother. I found their relationship quite annoying. At times I wanted to throw the book and rip out all the pages. Especially when Kendra told her mother the identity of her rapist and the way her mother reacted made me want to punch someone.
I have got to say though, the ending left me shocked. I seriously had no idea about the identity of the rapist.
I am glad things turned out better for Kendra and she found her happy ending with Meghan and I am glad Meghan also found happiness. (She goes through shit at home too .-.)
I liked Stained better than this book.
Sandy is cute and he is mine. ;-;
August 15, 2011
This review is taken from my new review blog:
http://www.trythisbookonforsize.blogs...
Review:
Fifteen-year old Kendra is such a strong, endearing and memorable character. The fact that she cuts her arms to the point of mutilation makes her no less strong. Scars opens with Kendra telling her therapist Carolyn that someone is following her. The reader is hooked by this revelation. When she tells Carolyn it’s her molester who is out there stalking her, the implausibility of this happening pushes the reader even harder to find out what happens. In the end of Chapter One, though, Kendra discovers a note from her abuser in her backpack, confirming her suspicions to both her therapist and the reader.
Kendra cannot remember the identity of her abuser. The stress she experiences through both vague memories of her abuse, and the stalking from her unknown perpetrator, cause her to cut to relieve the pain. When Meghan enters her life—originally to rescue her from bullying in the school hallway—Kendra experiences a glimmer of hope for her future. With Meghan and Carolyn at her side, the reader gets a sense of hope for Kendra’s eventual recovery. But it’s not an easy road ahead of her.
Rainfield skilfully keeps the reader on edge through the unfolding of this dark and realistic story of childhood sexual abuse. What really touched me the most about this story is the heartbreaking way Kendra occasionally suspected one of the most caring people in her life of being her abuser. Sandy, her mother’s homosexual friend, is always there for Kendra…always filled with love and understanding for her. But her struggle to remember the details of her abuse, and the face of the man behind it, means nobody in her life is above suspicion. Through her suspicion of Sandy, the reader gets a keen sense of the turmoil Kendra lives in.
Readers will become fully engrossed in this young adult novel. Rainfield has drawn such a paradoxically strong and broken character in Kendra that the reader will both fear and long for her memory to be recovered, for her life to be restored. They will feel Kendra’s urge to cut and they will experience temporary relief when she does, so powerful are Rainfield’s descriptions of the stress and pain that Kendra experiences. She writes Kendra’s helplessness and determination to reclaim her life with such painstaking accuracy that the reader cannot help but get totally engaged with this story. Though I thought I worked out who the abuser was early on in the story, I was still fully engrossed in discovering if I was right and how exactly the story would play out. Rainfield delivered a satisfying ending, worthy of the build-up created by Kendra’s journey of pain.
Scars is an important book. It’s a brave look into the wasteland that is left behind when our children are sexually molested. It’s a book of truth, pain and hope. Rainfield turns a spotlight on a topic that needs to be brought into the open. And she does it in a no-holds-barred way, offering up a true look into the horrible reality that too many children face.
http://www.trythisbookonforsize.blogs...
Review:
Fifteen-year old Kendra is such a strong, endearing and memorable character. The fact that she cuts her arms to the point of mutilation makes her no less strong. Scars opens with Kendra telling her therapist Carolyn that someone is following her. The reader is hooked by this revelation. When she tells Carolyn it’s her molester who is out there stalking her, the implausibility of this happening pushes the reader even harder to find out what happens. In the end of Chapter One, though, Kendra discovers a note from her abuser in her backpack, confirming her suspicions to both her therapist and the reader.
Kendra cannot remember the identity of her abuser. The stress she experiences through both vague memories of her abuse, and the stalking from her unknown perpetrator, cause her to cut to relieve the pain. When Meghan enters her life—originally to rescue her from bullying in the school hallway—Kendra experiences a glimmer of hope for her future. With Meghan and Carolyn at her side, the reader gets a sense of hope for Kendra’s eventual recovery. But it’s not an easy road ahead of her.
Rainfield skilfully keeps the reader on edge through the unfolding of this dark and realistic story of childhood sexual abuse. What really touched me the most about this story is the heartbreaking way Kendra occasionally suspected one of the most caring people in her life of being her abuser. Sandy, her mother’s homosexual friend, is always there for Kendra…always filled with love and understanding for her. But her struggle to remember the details of her abuse, and the face of the man behind it, means nobody in her life is above suspicion. Through her suspicion of Sandy, the reader gets a keen sense of the turmoil Kendra lives in.
Readers will become fully engrossed in this young adult novel. Rainfield has drawn such a paradoxically strong and broken character in Kendra that the reader will both fear and long for her memory to be recovered, for her life to be restored. They will feel Kendra’s urge to cut and they will experience temporary relief when she does, so powerful are Rainfield’s descriptions of the stress and pain that Kendra experiences. She writes Kendra’s helplessness and determination to reclaim her life with such painstaking accuracy that the reader cannot help but get totally engaged with this story. Though I thought I worked out who the abuser was early on in the story, I was still fully engrossed in discovering if I was right and how exactly the story would play out. Rainfield delivered a satisfying ending, worthy of the build-up created by Kendra’s journey of pain.
Scars is an important book. It’s a brave look into the wasteland that is left behind when our children are sexually molested. It’s a book of truth, pain and hope. Rainfield turns a spotlight on a topic that needs to be brought into the open. And she does it in a no-holds-barred way, offering up a true look into the horrible reality that too many children face.
January 11, 2018
Wow. This book was incredibly intense. I have to say I cannot relate to this at all, so I don't know how realistic and relatable it actually is, but the phrase 'I had to cut I just had to' got a little repetitive. I'm kind of worried to speak badly of this book due to its audience and me not having any personal experience of the topic, but I found her a little bit annoying. The I also found the speed of the relationship silly. And how quickly the feelings were reciprocated. Yet another thing I disliked was how I do the same thing, but it was a lot more frustrating and exasperating in a novel. Also as I listened to the audio so I couldn't really tell what was thought and what was said.
Right at the start of the book when it mentioned 'pedophile' I had a quick thought that it might have been who it was proven to be, but I wasn't too sure. Especially how I hated her parents for Another reason why I dislike her mother was for Although I did really love the
Right at the start of the book when it mentioned 'pedophile' I had a quick thought that it might have been who it was proven to be, but I wasn't too sure. Especially how I hated her parents for Another reason why I dislike her mother was for Although I did really love the
June 3, 2016
I've been sitting here staring at my screen trying to figure out what to say and I'm coming up blank because words can't accurately describe how I feel about this book. So I'm just gonna attempt this and hope it doesn't sound too crappy.
No other book has ever affected me this much emotionally. Ever. Maybe it's just me. Maybe it's because I get it and I know exactly what Kendra (the main character) is feeling, I don't know.
(The only negative-ish thing I'd say about this book is that the writing style is a bit iffy but I'm not entirely sure what I mean by that and it's such a minor problem that I'm writing this in parentheses as a vague side note instead of an actual issue)
I felt myself connecting so deeply with Kendra that it was almost physically painful. It was actually extremely hard for me to read this book, considering my past with cutting (I'm 1.5 years self harm free right now though which is the longest ever since I started 10 years ago) and considering the sexual assault I went through. But I pretty much couldn't put the book down. Half the time I felt like I WAS Kendra, that's how connected I felt.
And when I finished? I started crying. No, not crying. Sobbing. I haven't cried like that in a really long time. Part of it was from pain/grief/memories, everything suddenly feeling fresh and new again. A small part of it was from feeling triggered in regards to self harm. But ever since I finished the book I've been questioning what the main reason behind such emotional sobbing was and I think I figured it out.
Relief.
It's like... wow. Someone actually gets it. Someone really knows how this feels and how/why self harm seems to help as well as creative outlets (for Kendra it was art, for me it's writing) and how much memories can truly hurt and managed to almost completely describe it in words. I'm not alone.
And now I'm crying all over again.
No other book has ever affected me this much emotionally. Ever. Maybe it's just me. Maybe it's because I get it and I know exactly what Kendra (the main character) is feeling, I don't know.
(The only negative-ish thing I'd say about this book is that the writing style is a bit iffy but I'm not entirely sure what I mean by that and it's such a minor problem that I'm writing this in parentheses as a vague side note instead of an actual issue)
I felt myself connecting so deeply with Kendra that it was almost physically painful. It was actually extremely hard for me to read this book, considering my past with cutting (I'm 1.5 years self harm free right now though which is the longest ever since I started 10 years ago) and considering the sexual assault I went through. But I pretty much couldn't put the book down. Half the time I felt like I WAS Kendra, that's how connected I felt.
And when I finished? I started crying. No, not crying. Sobbing. I haven't cried like that in a really long time. Part of it was from pain/grief/memories, everything suddenly feeling fresh and new again. A small part of it was from feeling triggered in regards to self harm. But ever since I finished the book I've been questioning what the main reason behind such emotional sobbing was and I think I figured it out.
Relief.
It's like... wow. Someone actually gets it. Someone really knows how this feels and how/why self harm seems to help as well as creative outlets (for Kendra it was art, for me it's writing) and how much memories can truly hurt and managed to almost completely describe it in words. I'm not alone.
And now I'm crying all over again.
December 27, 2011
I read this book after learning a bit more about the author and her life, especially noting that the arms on the cover are her own. There is nothing bad that I can say about Scars. Scars does for realistic fiction what other books have fallen short of which is telling the complete truth, which can only be done sometimes, and regrettably, through experience.
Kendra battles self-mutilation tendencies after being sexually assaulted and then stalked by her rapist. Instead of focusing mainly on her cutting,as many self-harm books seem to do, the book focuses on her life and her fear of the rapist and her abuse, her mother who has NO CLUE how to help, and her friendship and budding romance with Meghan.
As a librarian who works with all types of teens and especially troubled teens, I am most thankful that Cheryl did not write a book about self-harm and rape and then finish a book with 'The End' and be done with it. Instead, she provides EXTENSIVE resources for readers so that those who may be suffering have now found a helping hand and self-affirmations that could save their lives. Cheryl is definitely a world changer and has saved lives and may not even know it.
Kendra battles self-mutilation tendencies after being sexually assaulted and then stalked by her rapist. Instead of focusing mainly on her cutting,as many self-harm books seem to do, the book focuses on her life and her fear of the rapist and her abuse, her mother who has NO CLUE how to help, and her friendship and budding romance with Meghan.
As a librarian who works with all types of teens and especially troubled teens, I am most thankful that Cheryl did not write a book about self-harm and rape and then finish a book with 'The End' and be done with it. Instead, she provides EXTENSIVE resources for readers so that those who may be suffering have now found a helping hand and self-affirmations that could save their lives. Cheryl is definitely a world changer and has saved lives and may not even know it.
June 9, 2012
I read this book on my eReader while sitting in Starbucks. It riveted me to my seat. And released me only when I'd finished. I felt as though I was holding my breath as I flew through this book. It's a powerful story, written in an evocative style of language. Scars tells the story of pain, of pain so horrific that no language exists to describe it. I loved the author's use of art as a language, a medium for Kendra to purge her soul and reach for the truth of her past. I love also the mystery surrounding the stalker/perpetrator, and the way Rainfield pairs it up with Kendra's recovery of her suppressed memories. This book is about a teenage girl finding herself as much as it is a gripping, page-turning kind of book. It's quite clever that the stalker stalks and secretly threatens Kendra in order to prevent her from further recovery and disclosure, which only ends up nudging her closer and closer to the edge of memory recovery.
I loved the characters, and wished read more
I loved the characters, and wished read more
February 8, 2010
I read this riveting story in less than 24 hours while in the Cayman Islands, so obviously it's gripping. Cheryl Rainfield tackles difficult, traumatic subjects such as rape and self-harm and the angst of high school rejection yet makes the novel very readable. The cover is the arm of Cheryl Rainfield. The novel will bring hope to those girls and women who suffer silently and will open a new world of understanding for those of us who are learning about this for the first time. The end of the book has so many resources for people struggling with many of the hardships in this book. There is great hope in this book. It's available for pre-sale now and will be released on March 24, 2010.
Read
November 8, 2010I recently heard the following statistics: 1 out of 4 girls are sexually abused and 1 out of 6 boys are sexually abused. Scary numbers indeed! Scars is an important, emotional story about sexual abuse and cutting. It is hard to read, but even harder to put down. Whether you or someone you know has been abused or whether you want to understand the physical/spiritual/sexual/emotional impact, this novel is IT! There is a lot of intrigue and questions as the reader is led on a journey with the MC to discovering her perpetrator so that she can move forward on her path to healing. This novel will haunt you long after you put it down. Truly memorable. A must read!
December 21, 2023
This was a very painful but good book. I think reading books like this is important, to gain awareness about difficult topics like sexual/child abuse. However, maybe not this one particularly. This book is very gory.
I unfortunately, did not read the book description before listening to the audiobook and what I quickly discovered is that the main character self harms and it is described in UNBELIEVABLE detail. Therefore, if you get queasy about blood like I do, I REALLY don’t recommend reading his book. I had to stop listening in my car to this book on three different occasions because I was about to throw up or pass out. You can imagine the issue with that while driving…
Otherwise a very good book. And I should really be a detective because I knew the perpetrator instantly.
I unfortunately, did not read the book description before listening to the audiobook and what I quickly discovered is that the main character self harms and it is described in UNBELIEVABLE detail. Therefore, if you get queasy about blood like I do, I REALLY don’t recommend reading his book. I had to stop listening in my car to this book on three different occasions because I was about to throw up or pass out. You can imagine the issue with that while driving…
Otherwise a very good book. And I should really be a detective because I knew the perpetrator instantly.
July 8, 2012
I honestly don't know where to start with this review. This book is one of the best I've read so far this year - maybe one of the best I've ever read. It completely and absolutely blew me away. I applaud Cheryl Rainfield for her remarkable writing and the compassion with which she wrote the story.
'Scars' is a deeply moving story about Kendra, a fifteen year old girl who has suffered at the hands of a sexual abuser since she was a very little girl. To deal with the pain and the flashes of memories that flood her, she cuts herself. She does this to cope - not to try to commit suicide. Along with not fitting in at school and not being able to connect with her parents, Kendra also must deal with the fact that she is a lesbian. Her parents believe it might be a phase or a product of her sexual abuse. Then Kendra meets Meghan, who teaches her to believe in herself and makes her finally feel happy again.
This story deals with really heavy and serious subjects such as sexual abuse and self-harming in the form of cutting. Self-harm is a very stigmatized subject in our society and the fact that Rainfield talks about it in such a compassionate way really moved me. In her author's note, Rainfield discloses to the reader that she used to be a cutter herself. I believe that it is due to this fact that she was able to write about cutting with such poignancy and tact. People shy away from the subject, but Rainfield introduces the reader to the real reasons people cut and what makes them do so. Readers will get an insider look at the thoughts and emotions that people who cut deal with. It is such a compassionate look at this problem and I cannot praise Rainfield enough for writing about it in such an amazing way.
On top of the subject of self-harm is the very difficult subject of sexual abuse, and in this case, of a child. The reader is immediately empathetic to Kendra and her difficult life. We cheer her on to stay strong and to remember who abused her so she will find justice. In the end, Kendra and the reader discover who the abuser was, and it is terrifying and liberating at the same time. My heart literally ached for Kendra and her pain in this novel. It is written with such heartfelt insight and from such a deeply personal level that it was hard not to completely lose myself in the story - which I did. The storyline was fresh and dealt with very difficult topics, but it was amazingly well written and the storyline was filled with tension, which keeps the reader eagerly turning pages until the very end. Truthfully, I couldn't stop thinking about this book long after I read it. It had a very personal and powerful effect on me and it will be a book I re-read many times throughout my life. I highly highly recommend this book to anyone who knows someone that has dealt with abuse and/or self-harm, as well as to anyone who personally deals with those same issues. It will open your heart and your eyes to some very real problems going on in our world today and you will come away with a new understanding and compassion for those who suffer from them.
Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
'Scars' is a deeply moving story about Kendra, a fifteen year old girl who has suffered at the hands of a sexual abuser since she was a very little girl. To deal with the pain and the flashes of memories that flood her, she cuts herself. She does this to cope - not to try to commit suicide. Along with not fitting in at school and not being able to connect with her parents, Kendra also must deal with the fact that she is a lesbian. Her parents believe it might be a phase or a product of her sexual abuse. Then Kendra meets Meghan, who teaches her to believe in herself and makes her finally feel happy again.
This story deals with really heavy and serious subjects such as sexual abuse and self-harming in the form of cutting. Self-harm is a very stigmatized subject in our society and the fact that Rainfield talks about it in such a compassionate way really moved me. In her author's note, Rainfield discloses to the reader that she used to be a cutter herself. I believe that it is due to this fact that she was able to write about cutting with such poignancy and tact. People shy away from the subject, but Rainfield introduces the reader to the real reasons people cut and what makes them do so. Readers will get an insider look at the thoughts and emotions that people who cut deal with. It is such a compassionate look at this problem and I cannot praise Rainfield enough for writing about it in such an amazing way.
On top of the subject of self-harm is the very difficult subject of sexual abuse, and in this case, of a child. The reader is immediately empathetic to Kendra and her difficult life. We cheer her on to stay strong and to remember who abused her so she will find justice. In the end, Kendra and the reader discover who the abuser was, and it is terrifying and liberating at the same time. My heart literally ached for Kendra and her pain in this novel. It is written with such heartfelt insight and from such a deeply personal level that it was hard not to completely lose myself in the story - which I did. The storyline was fresh and dealt with very difficult topics, but it was amazingly well written and the storyline was filled with tension, which keeps the reader eagerly turning pages until the very end. Truthfully, I couldn't stop thinking about this book long after I read it. It had a very personal and powerful effect on me and it will be a book I re-read many times throughout my life. I highly highly recommend this book to anyone who knows someone that has dealt with abuse and/or self-harm, as well as to anyone who personally deals with those same issues. It will open your heart and your eyes to some very real problems going on in our world today and you will come away with a new understanding and compassion for those who suffer from them.
Disclosure: I received a copy of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
July 1, 2019
I received this book for free from The Sold Gold Reviewers Program in exchange for an honest review. This does not affect my opinion of the book or the content of my review.
Wow. I didn’t really know the darkness I was getting myself into when I started this. I mean, it’s obviously an issue book. It also had to be pretty dark if it’s about a girl who cuts, but I didn’t expect it to be dark on so many levels. This is one that’s been on my to-read list for a very long time, and I’m glad I found an opportunity to get to it.
Scars is about Kendra, a teen struggling with the sexual abuse she experienced as a child. With the help of her therapist and a new friend, she tries to access buried memories to remember who her abuser was. Somehow, her abuser knows and he’ll do anything to keep her from remembering.
Let me begin by confirming that Scars is extremely dark and heavy. You should probably prepare yourself for that before you begin reading or listening. I was aware of the subject matter before beginning, but what really makes Scars as dark as it is are all the details. Kendra is experiencing a lot of emotional and psychological trauma. I’m not ashamed to say that I cried a few times, and I felt horrified at other times. She’s so strong though, even if she doesn’t realize. Surviving the kinds of things she went through is nothing less than amazing. There are numerous children and teens never make it through this kind of abuse. There are some other details that are shocking and awful, but I don’t want to spoil the wonderful way in which they’re revealed. Rainfield does such a great job with the pacing of this book. I was very invested in the characters and the plot. My one complaint has to do with the writing. There was no real room for processing. Instead, Rainfield spelled everything out for the reader; I would have enjoyed coming to my own conclusions a little more.
The narration was good. Not exceptional, but still worth the listen. Emily Bauer was definitely emotionally invested and does a great job with delivery and syntax. The downside is that the production quality wasn’t quite up to par. I don’t usually notice things like this, but an words with an “s” sounded harsh to me. I suppose the problem could have been my headphones, but I’ve never noticed anything like that before using them.
I recommend this book to readers who like gritty issue books. This book is appropriate for readers ages 16 and up.
Read more reviews at Owl Tell You About It.
Wow. I didn’t really know the darkness I was getting myself into when I started this. I mean, it’s obviously an issue book. It also had to be pretty dark if it’s about a girl who cuts, but I didn’t expect it to be dark on so many levels. This is one that’s been on my to-read list for a very long time, and I’m glad I found an opportunity to get to it.
Scars is about Kendra, a teen struggling with the sexual abuse she experienced as a child. With the help of her therapist and a new friend, she tries to access buried memories to remember who her abuser was. Somehow, her abuser knows and he’ll do anything to keep her from remembering.
Let me begin by confirming that Scars is extremely dark and heavy. You should probably prepare yourself for that before you begin reading or listening. I was aware of the subject matter before beginning, but what really makes Scars as dark as it is are all the details. Kendra is experiencing a lot of emotional and psychological trauma. I’m not ashamed to say that I cried a few times, and I felt horrified at other times. She’s so strong though, even if she doesn’t realize. Surviving the kinds of things she went through is nothing less than amazing. There are numerous children and teens never make it through this kind of abuse. There are some other details that are shocking and awful, but I don’t want to spoil the wonderful way in which they’re revealed. Rainfield does such a great job with the pacing of this book. I was very invested in the characters and the plot. My one complaint has to do with the writing. There was no real room for processing. Instead, Rainfield spelled everything out for the reader; I would have enjoyed coming to my own conclusions a little more.
The narration was good. Not exceptional, but still worth the listen. Emily Bauer was definitely emotionally invested and does a great job with delivery and syntax. The downside is that the production quality wasn’t quite up to par. I don’t usually notice things like this, but an words with an “s” sounded harsh to me. I suppose the problem could have been my headphones, but I’ve never noticed anything like that before using them.
I recommend this book to readers who like gritty issue books. This book is appropriate for readers ages 16 and up.
Read more reviews at Owl Tell You About It.
July 21, 2011
I'm not sure what to say here. I heard so much hype about this book, and was really looking forward to it, as I love a good teen problem novel. And it started out very strong.
Somewhere along the way, though, it started to fall apart a little. Either that, or it started to feel contrived.
One thing that can really bother me about a book is when pacing is uneven, or the author makes leaps in pacing before I'm ready to buy into it. I think that's really what happened here. More on that in a moment...
1. Kendra, the main character, is in therapy dealing with the trauma of repressed memories of sexual abuse. This makes for gritty, emotional subject matter, but it's also entangled with the focus on her sexuality. I felt like the author was loading up on hot-button issues, but I didn't feel like it was necessary in the case of this book. If you want to write GLBT lit, fine, but do it justice. The whole idea that Kendra "loves" Meghan after essentially 2 encounters is a little far-fetched, even for teen lit. I think it would have been possible to write a powerful book without playing that angle.
2. One of my pet peeves is the "slightly-too-neat-and-convenient-ending." All loose ends and conflicts are prettily wrapped up and resolved, when we know darn well this situation in real life wouldn't be that tidy. Mom, who was hideously resistant to Kendra's sexuality, and utterly blind to the cutting, suddenly sees the light at the end, goes to therapy, and in a matter of a few months, daughter's girlfriend is pretty much a fixture around the house, likely to move in? Again, I wasn't ready for that leap, but the author seemed to think they'd done enough to get me there.
I suppose it wasn't all bad. It did start strong. I was pulled in by the fact that someone was planting messages for Kendra and she was being stalked over time. And the notion that some cutters are taught to cut by abusers was a new one to me, which I do find interesting. But I felt the novel would have been stronger if the focus had been one just a few issues rather than the whole grab bag...
Somewhere along the way, though, it started to fall apart a little. Either that, or it started to feel contrived.
One thing that can really bother me about a book is when pacing is uneven, or the author makes leaps in pacing before I'm ready to buy into it. I think that's really what happened here. More on that in a moment...
1. Kendra, the main character, is in therapy dealing with the trauma of repressed memories of sexual abuse. This makes for gritty, emotional subject matter, but it's also entangled with the focus on her sexuality. I felt like the author was loading up on hot-button issues, but I didn't feel like it was necessary in the case of this book. If you want to write GLBT lit, fine, but do it justice. The whole idea that Kendra "loves" Meghan after essentially 2 encounters is a little far-fetched, even for teen lit. I think it would have been possible to write a powerful book without playing that angle.
2. One of my pet peeves is the "slightly-too-neat-and-convenient-ending." All loose ends and conflicts are prettily wrapped up and resolved, when we know darn well this situation in real life wouldn't be that tidy. Mom, who was hideously resistant to Kendra's sexuality, and utterly blind to the cutting, suddenly sees the light at the end, goes to therapy, and in a matter of a few months, daughter's girlfriend is pretty much a fixture around the house, likely to move in? Again, I wasn't ready for that leap, but the author seemed to think they'd done enough to get me there.
I suppose it wasn't all bad. It did start strong. I was pulled in by the fact that someone was planting messages for Kendra and she was being stalked over time. And the notion that some cutters are taught to cut by abusers was a new one to me, which I do find interesting. But I felt the novel would have been stronger if the focus had been one just a few issues rather than the whole grab bag...
June 12, 2011
Leanette recommended this one, and then it was one of the 'dark and depressing' YA novels mentioned in the Wall Street Journal commentary attacking YA literature. This is one that will haunt me for a long time. Kendra has been starting to remember more and more about the sexual abuse she suffered from the age of two. TWO!! What she can't remember is the face of her abuser...is it her mother's friend? Her father's friend, and one of her teachers? Who? She's in therapy, and memories seem to be bubbling to the surface. Kendra's a cutter...a serious cutter. That began at about the same time as the therapy. She's hiding her self-mutilation from everyone, and just trying to survive.
Her family life is complicated. Both she and her mother are talented artists, but their art is very different. Her mother seems to be in some strange competition with Kendra, and is hypercritical. Her dad's job seems to be falling apart, and money for Kendra's therapy may be cut. Just when she's reaching for the face of her abuser...just when she's beginning to understand her art and her heart.
Watching this wounded girl try to navigate her day, in class and at home, is a revelation. Kendra's a survivor; she just doesn't know it yet.
To dismiss this book as 'too dark' is to negate the reality that some of our children live with. To dismiss Kendra is to turn our backs on suffering people whose life is NOT our own. This is someone's story -- it may be the author's own. THIS book will be in the hands of my students next year, and they will either recognize themselves, or they will learn to be compassionate to others who are fighting for their lives.
Her family life is complicated. Both she and her mother are talented artists, but their art is very different. Her mother seems to be in some strange competition with Kendra, and is hypercritical. Her dad's job seems to be falling apart, and money for Kendra's therapy may be cut. Just when she's reaching for the face of her abuser...just when she's beginning to understand her art and her heart.
Watching this wounded girl try to navigate her day, in class and at home, is a revelation. Kendra's a survivor; she just doesn't know it yet.
To dismiss this book as 'too dark' is to negate the reality that some of our children live with. To dismiss Kendra is to turn our backs on suffering people whose life is NOT our own. This is someone's story -- it may be the author's own. THIS book will be in the hands of my students next year, and they will either recognize themselves, or they will learn to be compassionate to others who are fighting for their lives.
July 20, 2012
Scars is definitely a book that was mind boggling. While reading the first few chapters, I thought I might DNF it. And my reason for that was because I thought the author was trying to fool the readers in making us believe Kendra was being followed when in reality she was just plain paranoid. But I decided to give it a shot and keep reading. And I'm glad I did.
Scars was a raw and emotional read. It takes you inside the mind of a person who was abused. You clearly see the results of abuse with Kendra. Dealing with it wasn't easy. And sadly she didn't really have anyone to turn to when things were happening. And as result of not having anyone, she had to find an outlet to help her cope which ended up being cutting.
The cutting issue in this story left me heartbroken. Just to think of how counseling and a lending ear can be just enough to help them. Like Kendra, she just really needed someone to hear her out without judgement. And lucky for her she had counseling and she had Meghan. Having counseling and Meghan in her life plays a very important role in her development.
Rainfield didn't sugarcoat anything in her novel. She gave it to you raw and uncut. She painted a descriptive picture for the reader to understand exactly what was happening and exactly what Kendra was feeling. At the end of her novel, Rainfield wrote a note to her readers and note had me choking back tears. The subject of cutting was emotional and personal to her. I'm happy I gave this book a chance. I give Scars a 4 stars and a definite Good Choice for Reading.
http://www.goodchoicereading.com/2012...
Scars was a raw and emotional read. It takes you inside the mind of a person who was abused. You clearly see the results of abuse with Kendra. Dealing with it wasn't easy. And sadly she didn't really have anyone to turn to when things were happening. And as result of not having anyone, she had to find an outlet to help her cope which ended up being cutting.
The cutting issue in this story left me heartbroken. Just to think of how counseling and a lending ear can be just enough to help them. Like Kendra, she just really needed someone to hear her out without judgement. And lucky for her she had counseling and she had Meghan. Having counseling and Meghan in her life plays a very important role in her development.
Rainfield didn't sugarcoat anything in her novel. She gave it to you raw and uncut. She painted a descriptive picture for the reader to understand exactly what was happening and exactly what Kendra was feeling. At the end of her novel, Rainfield wrote a note to her readers and note had me choking back tears. The subject of cutting was emotional and personal to her. I'm happy I gave this book a chance. I give Scars a 4 stars and a definite Good Choice for Reading.
http://www.goodchoicereading.com/2012...
May 16, 2012
"Scars" is a glorious recounting of an adolescent girl’s travails with awakening, and awakened, memory. I call it glorious because it so precisely delineates the events, emotions, thoughts, paranoia, justifiable fears, anger, resentment, that Kendra undergoes. Her classmates, mother, therapist, and much older gay friend Sandy are so true-to-life. Her budding friendship with classmate Meghan, also a survivor (and current victim) is precious and hope-inspiring. Kendra’s slowly awakening-yet halting-memories ring true and realistic. I marvel at the multiple ways in which author Cheryl Rainfield has delineated Kendra and those around her. It is so easy to see through her eyes, hear through her ears, think her thoughts along with her-and most importantly, to empathize with Kendra’s pain, and the other emotions that accompany it: the perception of betrayal, the bitterness, rage, resentment-the longing for help, but more, the yearning to replace her past with a different one, a positive, loving, affectionate, and protected past.
I totally recommend this book: for survivors of childhood abuse of any nature; for those who are still undergoing abuse; and for the loved ones, friends, and helpers who live with, befriend, or work with survivors. Everyone can benefit from this book. I give it a rating of 13 or above, due to the terrifying situations which Kendra experienced, even as a very young child. This book rings out truth, and deserves a vast audience.
I totally recommend this book: for survivors of childhood abuse of any nature; for those who are still undergoing abuse; and for the loved ones, friends, and helpers who live with, befriend, or work with survivors. Everyone can benefit from this book. I give it a rating of 13 or above, due to the terrifying situations which Kendra experienced, even as a very young child. This book rings out truth, and deserves a vast audience.
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