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Beloved Infidel

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Autobiography, love story, and literary history, this classic memoir is "the very best portrait of F. Scott Fitzgerald that has yet been put into print". So wrote critic Edmund Wilson about this international best seller in 1959. Sheilah Graham paints an intimate yet objective portrait of Fitzgerald -- turning out screenplays in late-1930s Hollywood to pay his debts, frequently drunk and increasingly despondent over his declining literary reputation. Strengthened and encouraged by Graham, Fitzgerald started his last and most ambitious novel, The Last Tycoon. Graham served as his model for the character Kathleen. But in 1940 he died in her home before completing the book. In Beloved Infidel, Graham also traces her own life, a tale part Cinderella, part Pygmalion that begins in her native England. Her early career on the stage and in journalism led her to Hollywood and a thirty-five-year career as a gossip columnist. Graham died in November 1988.

257 pages, Mass Market Paperback

First published January 1, 1958

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About the author

Sheilah Graham

41 books11 followers
Sheilah Graham (15 September 1904 – 17 November 1988) was an English-born, nationally-syndicated American gossip columnist during Hollywood's "Golden Age". Along with Louella Parsons and Hedda Hopper, Graham came to wield sufficient power to make or break Hollywood careers – prompting her to describe herself as "the last of the unholy trio."

Graham was also known for her relationship with F. Scott Fitzgerald, a relationship she played a significant role in immortalizing, through her autobiographical account of that period, Beloved Infidel, a best-seller, which was also made into a film. In her youth, she had been a showgirl, and a freelance writer for Fleet Street in London, and had published several short stories and two novels. These early experiences would converge in her career in Hollywood, that spanned nearly four decades, as a successful columnist and author.

(from Wikipedia)

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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
Profile Image for Lisa of Troy.
1,381 reviews8,275 followers
November 24, 2025
"Don’t read more than ten pages a day,” Scott suggested. “Read slowly and carefully and assimilate what you’ve read before going on.”

The Scott mentioned above is, of course, F. Scott Fitzgerald.

Please keep that in mind when lamenting how “little” you read this year.

"The object of education is to provide you with a key to knowledge,” he explained. But most people on leaving college threw the key away. “Only those who are eager for it should have a college education. The schools are neglecting their most important responsibility; to make education interesting, to make you love and enjoy it, to apply it to your own life after you leave school.”

Sheilah Graham is one of the most undervalued figures in history.

Beloved Infidel is her autobiography.

She grew up in a London orphanage, tossed out when she aged out of the system. Yet, she was able to rise above.

Later in her life, she met F. Scott Fitzgerald. At this time, Fitzgerald’s wife, Zelda, had been living in a mental institution for many years so Fitzgerald and Ms. Graham struck up a romance. She was the one who bore the brunt of Fitzgerald’s alcoholism. Without Ms. Graham, there would be no The Last Tycoon (in my opinion Fitzgerald’s second greatest book).

Because Ms. Graham’s schooling stopped at an early age, she asked Fitzgerald to teach her. He designed The College of One, an entire curriculum for her.

Ms. Graham donated almost all of the books in The College of One to Princeton. Think about how much all of these books would bring at auction. How much would a signed copy of The Great Gatsby fetch?

When I was at Princeton, I leafed through the copy of This Side of Paradise, the copy Ms. Graham donated. The very book in my hands may very well have been the last time Fitzgerald read his debut novel. Do you know what he wrote on the back flyleaf? He had a list of words that had been spelled incorrectly. Yes, when he thought of the book responsible for his limited fame during his lifetime, the book that allowed him to marry Zelda, he was fixated on what he could have done better.

Life isn’t always neat and tidy. It is often a sticky mess.

Fitzgerald died in Sheilah Graham’s arms. Yet, she was discouraged from attending his funeral.

Ms. Graham earns a place in the history books. She lived a real-life rags-to-riches story, and she lived her values.

If you ever doubt it, look up JD Salinger and the sale of love letters from his former love interests. Now, imagine having a cache of his first edition books all signed by him. Not too many people would be able to resist selling them.

And now anyone, yes, even you can go to Princeton and request to see the books in The College of One.

The Green Light at the End of the Dock (How much I spent):
Hardcover Text – $45 from Thriftbooks

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Profile Image for Amber.
486 reviews56 followers
February 7, 2012
I actually didn't realize what this book was until I picked it up to read it after owning it for upwards of 10 years.

It is the story of F Scott Fitzgerald as told by his mistress, Hollywood gossip columnist and former orphanage-dweller Sheilah Graham. Her story before Scott is way more interesting and far less degrading that her time with him.

Hey ladies. Don't get all romantic about F Scott Fitzgerald. He is the worst bad boyfriend ever. LET'S BREAK IT DOWN.
- He is married
- He has intense bouts of alcoholism
- He is tubercular
- He gets drunk and reveals your darkest secrets
- He is kind of a jerk to his daughter
- He takes everything you write and re-writes it
- He THREATENS YOUR LIFE and then sends you apologetic letters and roses and you feel bad for hating him. THAT IS CALLED THE CYCLE OF VIOLENCE, LADIES. BREAK IT.


Sure he writes you poems and introduces you to Dorothy Parker but, ladies! You were courted by a MARQUEES.
Profile Image for Jim Dooley.
916 reviews69 followers
June 27, 2019
The dust jacket states that BELOVED INFIDEL is an “autobiography, love story, and literary history.” It is all of that. I was unprepared for its scope and the high level of empathy it awakened in me.

BELOVED INFIDEL has often been mentioned as “the F. Scott Fitzgerald love affair” book, presenting a side of the famous writer that was seldom detailed. While that certainly occupies that last half of the book, it is a shame to so curtly dismiss that it is also the autobiography of Sheilah Graham, and that her story is no less involving.

The Reader learns that Sheilah Graham was mortified by the impoverished circumstances of her early years. Yet, this is an important aspect because it explains her desire to rise above her circumstances and claim a place as a person worthy of note of her own accord. I had assumed that I would be stumbling through the “non-Fitzgerald” first half, waiting for my reward of his presence in the second half. However, that was not the case. Graham’s story was fascinating throughout.

Her arrival in Hollywood and her rise as a gossip columnist featured many wonderful anecdotes, and I found myself laughing out loud on multiple occasions ... especially when she told her readers about Hollywood as it actually was without putting a “spin” on it, to the enmity of the Powers That Be.

Then, she meets Fitzgerald.

For those who envision the famous writer with a classic halo, the story of Graham’s time with Fitzgerald will be difficult terrain to traverse. This was an incredibly difficult period in his life, and charming scenes are alternated with horrific ones. Graham defends him, but his behavior and mood swings are not for the faint-hearted.

Later in the book, I learned that Fitzgerald had a condition that burned sugar very quickly. It was why he would be seen ingesting huge quantities of soda pop. Unfortunately, alcohol is also high on sugar, and his personality altered in frightening ways when he was under its influence. The details of his addiction were terrible, although there was the triumph of his final year being alcohol-free.

In addition to Fitzgerald, Graham introduces the Reader to Charlie Chaplin, Robert Benchley and Dorothy Parker among others. We also meet Fitzgerald’s daughter, Scottie, and learn of Fitzgerald’s impression of Ernest Hemingway.

As a special treat, Graham tells about the “Fitzgerald College of One.” Being ashamed of the gaps in her knowledge of literature, history, music and art, she asked Fitzgerald if he would tutor her. He not only did this (causing others to note that she was remarkably well-read), but Graham also includes lists of material he thought was essential. When she completed a “course,” she received a copy of a novel by Charles Dickens ... and I was pleased to discover that my favorite Dickens book, BLEAK HOUSE, was also viewed by Fitzgerald as his best.

Fitzgerald students know that Graham and Fitzgerald were together when he died. Her recounting of those events were very moving, and I’ll admit to having a tear in my eye.

BELOVED INFIDEL was published in 1958 and is well-worth the read. Although I haven’t seen it, I’m told it was made into a stultifyingly bad movie. No doubt, Fitzgerald would have felt betrayed by Hollywood once more.
440 reviews16 followers
April 12, 2025
Beloved Infidel comes to life in the third part of the book that details her affair with F. Scott Fitzgerald from the late thirties until his death in December 1940. Prior to meeting Scott, Graham lived the life of an adventuress. She was raised in an orphanage (her mother was too poverty stricken to keep her), and after coming of age, she struck out on her own with one thought: I want more. Thus began years of self-invention where she changed her name and her life story, and parlayed her prettiness into opportunities. Since this period was in the 1920s, she needed the help of men to get where she wanted to go, and though she kept her dignity in the telling of her tale, there is no question that she traded up the social world as she went along. She married a major who was old enough to be her father, and indeed he coached her in life like a dad. After she divorced him, she became engaged to a Marquess (although she didn't marry him).
Her life in England is told in shades of gray. Although she commits to telling the truth in the beginning of the book, there are multiple disconnects between her story and what can be found on Google. She said she had no family after her mother died, but google says she was the youngest of eight. She says that she was being educated to be a secretary in the orphanage, but google says she was being trained as a teacher. You can see the layers of stories that make up her life becoming more complicated as she went along.
Then her life went to full color when she went to America to pursue a career as a reporter. She fell into an opportunity to report on Hollywood, and managed to squeeze a whole career out of that chance: today, she is known for her relationship with Scott and for the fact that she was a leading Hollywood gossip columnist on par with Hedda Hopper and Louella Parsons and for being the model for 'Kathleen' from The Love of the Last Tycoon (Fitzgerald's last, unfinished novel, aka The Last Tycoon).
Her description of her four years with Scott really made the book worth reading. You can practically see her come alive when she writes of him - her memories are vibrant down to the color of his shirt on a particular afternoon, and you know that, three husbands aside, Scott, who she never married, was the love of her life. In the late 1930s when they were together, Scott was out of fashion and many people were surprised to find out that he was still alive. He struggled to get writing jobs in Hollywood, he suffered from alcoholism fueled by grief over his wife Zelda's madness. He was a handful and a mess and a challenge for Sheila to manage, but she still writes lovingly of his great charm and intellectual curiosity. And then he died suddenly of a heart attack in 1940. A little over a decade later, his writing was back in fashion, required reading for anyone who wanted to be considered educated, and The Great Gatsby was universally recognized as a masterpiece. Graham writes with bittersweet irony of a book dealer who offered her a good sum of money for all of her first editions of Fitzgerald. There was a soap opera version of Beloved Infidel made with Gregory Peck and Deborah Kerr, but of course the movie could never capture the authenticity of what Graham wrote. It is the irony of her life that her training as a master of self-invention prepared her for her long career as a teller of Hollywood tales, but it's when she found love that she found truth.
Profile Image for BoBandy.
128 reviews7 followers
July 5, 2009
This is worthwhile only for the insight into the last couple years of F. Scott Fitzgerald's life (which is handled far more skillfully in Budd Schulberg's "The Disenchanted").

Grahame was clearly an ambitious, self-centered, self-serving, self-promoting star-chaser. It is somewhat entertaining (depending on your taste for irony, I suppose) to observe her attempts to write herself as some sort of real-life Chauncey Gardiner, to whom everything happens by accident, without her instigation or active participation, but that's about it. Her shameless namedropping can be alternately amusing and annoying. And the pretense that she wasn't bonking old F. Scott is so ridiculous it's funny.
Profile Image for Jinjer.
1,008 reviews7 followers
July 25, 2012
This was so good!!! I read it in preparation for a Last Days of F. Scott Fitzgerald walking tour in West Hollywood.
Profile Image for Spencer.
289 reviews9 followers
March 16, 2015
Ostensibly about the relationship of Sheila Graham and F. Scott Fitzgerald, he does not enter until past the halfway mark. When I realize that the "beloved infidel" of the title is really Ms Graham, the emphasis on her in the memoir makes sense. Her life is quite interesting, rising from nothing and becoming one of the more notable personalities of mid-twentieth century America. Armed with pluck, gumption, and good looks, she carves out a successful Hollywood writing career describing the lives and travails of those personalities we choose to love and hate. Her relationship with Fitzgerald is very Hollywood-like, complete with fame, name dropping, and excesses of many types. But as we know, it ends predictably in tragedy. It is an interesting read for Fitzgerald fans, and a nice diversion from typical novel fare.
Profile Image for Mandi Bean.
Author 2 books19 followers
April 23, 2016
Though the narration was campy and melodramatic at times, the content remained compelling and was even heartbreaking at times. Even if a reader does not particularly care about F. Scott Fitzgerald, the universal aspects of the human experience (abandonment, neglect, shame, love, alcoholism, talent, insecurity, etc.) are still intriguing and inviting. Entertaining, but only recommended for those seeking a more intimate view of the life of F. Scott Fitzgerald, through the eyes of a woman who loved him.
12 reviews
December 7, 2010
The fact that I even know about this book shows my age (it was published eons ago , 1958) as well as my penchant for non-fiction biography. anyway, it is the love story of f. scott fitzgerald and Hollywood columnist sheila graham. Setting is old Hollywood - I found the insight into fitzgerald fascinating.
Profile Image for Karen.
1,045 reviews2 followers
September 17, 2017
The first half of the book focuses on the author's incredibly interesting life up to the time she came to live in Hollywood. The remainder of the book recounts her love affair with F. Scott Fitzgerald, and offers insight into his Hollywood years. I was unaware of this book until recently, and as Fitzgerald fan I completely devoured it.
Profile Image for Pip.
55 reviews2 followers
April 19, 2010
I rate this high not because I think the writing is particularly good, nor because I feel compelled to promote Sheilah Graham, but rather, being a great Fitzgerald fan, I am happy to learn something more about his humanity.
Profile Image for Graceann.
1,167 reviews
November 29, 2007
Sheilah Graham's moving account of her love affair with F. Scott Fitzgerald. He was a difficult man and so hard to love, but she did, and tells the story beautifully here.
1 review
September 24, 2021
I breezed through the first half-plus in a day. When I got to the part about Graham and Fitzgerald, though, it was a tremendous letdown. I knew he was an alcoholic, especially during his Hollywood days, but I had no idea how abusive he was. He shows many of the classic signs: Falls hard and fast for the other person, then controls and isolates them, and finally alternates periods of abuse with extreme regret, doting “love,” and promises to reform, which of course are always short-lived. It was hard to read this sorry tale “of human bondage.” Sheilah Graham herself is no peach, but a self-serving social climber. Her justification of having a hard-luck beginning in life doesn’t wash, since many people come out of those poor situations with a better moral compass than Ms. Graham seems to have had. (BTW, I also bought this book eons ago when I was apparently on a Fitzgerald jag but only just read it this week. Call it part of my pandemic home-library gleaning.)
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for mercedes.
150 reviews3 followers
August 30, 2017
real trashy but in a kind of valley of the dolls way? so of course i blew through it. the book did not paint a very flattering picture of fitzgerald imo, but i think that graham (who is, incidentally, a mansplainer's dream girl) meant to.
Profile Image for Whitney Moore.
Author 19 books25 followers
Read
March 31, 2022
Read this years and years ago (in 1971) and would re-read it again if I could find an affordable copy. My interest in Fitz and Hem and that whole crowd has been revived by Nancy Milford's book called Zelda.
Profile Image for Bryan Wilson.
Author 3 books4 followers
September 28, 2011
Although a little slow at the beginning, Beloved Infidel, the autobiography of Sheilah Graham, picks up the pace to tell the story of an orphan girl who manages to have a brief theatrical career before becoming an entertainment journalist during the 1930s. Graham's story is interesting, but her claim to fame is her four-year on and off affair with F. Scott Fitzgerald at the end of his life.

In many respects, this book is about Graham's romances, from her sham marriage to John Graham to her various suitors and, eventually, Fitzgerald himself. Overall, Graham shows a pluckiness and will that make this a story about overcoming one's childhood to achieve success, nevermind the fact that Graham changed her name and fabricated her identity.

Fitzgerald does not have much dimension in this biography, despite Graham's intimacy with the subject. He comes across as a charmer and romantic who is unable to maintain sobriety and cope with the decline of his fame. Still, the book yields just enough facts and dialogue to remain intriguing for those curious about Hollywood in the late 1930s and Fitzgerald's life story.
Profile Image for Sarah.
548 reviews35 followers
February 11, 2009
Sheilah Graham was F. Scott Fitzgerald's gossip columnist girlfriend. The best part of this book is the title, which isn't even her own work. It was Scott's description of her. The book is actually about her. The story, itself, is interesting. She did lead quite a remarkable life. I just wish Scott had been the one to pen it! It's worth reading for anecdotes about him. (He was a real pill to her, by the way).
Profile Image for Sally.
344 reviews3 followers
July 19, 2016
I couldn't really get into this book. I did not finish.
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews

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