The Secret Life of Objects

by Dawn Raffel, Sean Evers (Illustrator)

Selected by O, The Oprah * Best Memoirs * Best Beach Reads * Best First Lines * Top Books to Pick Up Now ** A Wall Street Journal Bestseller ** MORE PRAISE FOR THE SECRET LIFE OF OBJECTS “Her gift for capturing the nugget of a relationship in a single backward glance works beautifully in this illustrated memoir.” – The Chicago Tribune “The Secret Life of Objects is a lean, brilliant, playful memoir.” – The San Francisco Chronicle “Her memoir reflects on everyday objects such as a cup, a ring… From these memories comes a whole life story.” – Reader’s Digest “A unique, evocative memoir…written with all the wild bloom of imagination that fiction brings to the table.” – The Quivering Pen “This endearing memoir takes an assortment of otherwise ordinary possessions and turns it into a series of delicate, resonant stories.” – More Magazine “’Sometimes things shatter,’ Dawn Raffel writes in The Secret Life of Objects. ‘More often they just fade.’ But in this evocative memoir, moments from the past do not fade—they breathe on the page, rendering a striking portrait of a woman through her connections to the people she’s loved, the places she been, what’s been lost, and what remains. In clear, beautiful prose, Raffel reveals the haunting qualities of the objects we gather, as well as the sustaining and elusive nature of memory itself.” – Samuel Ligon, author of Drift and Stories “Dawn Raffel puts memories, people and secrets together like perfectly set gems in these shimmering stories, which are a delight to read. Every detail is exquisite, every character beautifully observed, and every object becomes sacred in her kind, capable hands. I savored every word. – Priscilla Warner, author of Learning to Breathe – My Yearlong Quest to Bring Calm to My Life

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction, Short Stories, Art, Essays

144 pages, Paperback

First published June 1, 2012

About the author

Dawn Raffel's illustrated memoir, The Secret Life of Objects, was a Wall Street Journal bestseller. Previous books include a critically acclaimed novel, Carrying the Body, and two story collections— Further Adventures in the Restless Universe and In the Year of Long Division.

Her writing has been published in O, The Oprah Magazine, BOMB, New Philosopher, The San Francisco Chronicle, Conjunctions, Black Book, Open City, The Anchor Book of New American Short Stories, Arts & Letters, The Quarterly, NOON, and numerous other periodicals and anthologies—most recently The Best Short Fictions 2016 (selected by Stuart Dybek) and The Best Short Fictions 2015 (selected by Robert Olen Butler).

She was a fiction editor for many years, helped launch O, The Oprah Magazine, where she served as Executive Articles Editor for seven years, and subsequently held senior-level "at- large" positions at More magazine and Reader's Digest. In addition, she served as the Center for Fiction's web editor. She has taught in the MFA program at Columbia University, the Center for Fiction, and at Summer Literary Seminars in St. Petersburg, Russia; Montreal; and Vilnius, Lithuania.

She currently works as an independent editor for individuals and creative organizations, specializing in memoir, short stories, and narrative nonfiction. She is also a certified yoga instructor and teaches embodied creative writing.

The Strange Case of Dr. Couney will be published by Blue Rider Press (a division of Penguin), July 31, 2018.

Reviews

[Obsidian · Rating 1 out of 5]

I DNFed this at 58 percent and stopped reading after "The Teacup." At that point I didn't care anymore about the secret life of objects.

One good thing about cleaning out my virtual TBR pile is for me to look back and wonder what the hell was I thinking when I bought some of the books I did. This book was definitely one of those moments for me. I still don't get what the author was trying in this collection of vignettes that are about the "object" in the title of the chapter you read.

This collection is boring. There's no other word for it. We just move from object to object and there's no sense of anything holding this together. If you don't realize it the author, Dawn Raffel is telling the reader about objects that she has.

I only really enjoyed one story and that was "The Mug." It whetted my appetite for the rest of the stories because I stupidly assumed the rest of them would be as moving as that one. Not so much. Instead of the secret life of objects, we were actually reading more about the secret life of the people using the objects.

I read "The Secret Life of Dresses" a few years ago and loved how the author actually had the dresses have a personality and tell a story about the women that wore them. I wish that the author had done that here, it would have been interesting to have the story told from the object's point of view. Instead we get nameless narrators who at times sound cold/indifferent or just bland. I didn't get any emotional response for the most part while reading this.

The flow was awful too. Some of these stories are just five sentences, some are several pages. The illustrations at the beginning of each object's story were cute and added visual interest, but not enough for me to keep reading this.

I wish that the author had just written a memoir about her life and her family since she kept zig-zagging all over the place and going back to certain people that are mentioned earlier (such as her mother, stepfather, and grandparents) it just adds to the overall confusion that I had while reading this.

[Maureen Stanton · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a quietly affecting, charming book, beautifully written. Raffel compiles meditations on various objects in her life and the stories behind them, which is an ingenious structure for a memoir (I'm going to use excerpts for teaching creative nonfiction writing). A mosaic or fragmented structure like this--composed of many sort vignettes--could grow wearisome, but it never does because Raffel's writing is exquisite; each vignette is both its own stand-alone prose poem, yet they add up to a family story, a sensibilty of the author. Most appealing is the author's reflective voice, the thinking she does about each object which yields pearls of wisdom that ring true and are poignant. Highly recommend.

[Suzie Q · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really wanted to like this book more. It was cute and short with essays on objects holding meaning and their own story, however it just seemed like random blog or diary entries thrown together into book form with sort of disjointed flow as it was all by one author. I really couldn't get behind the importance of each object. None of them seemed tremendously important or poignantly moving. It all seems like a bunch of stuff an art student would write about while reflecting on stuff she was selling on a tag sale.

No real emotion or grip to any of the stories or objects.

[Heather Fineisen · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is .99 through 9/21/14 on Amazon Kindle.


I chanced upon this today as a Kindle deal and feel like it was a gift. I may even have to purchase the physical book. I had never heard of Dawn Raffel, or this acclaimed book, but after reading it in one sitting, I am a fan of both. A tribute to favorite objects and the loved ones evoked, this is an easy and pleasurable distraction that will leave you thinking about the stories your favorite things tell.

[John · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some folks complain that the organization of content is too random for them, but I figured it must've made sense to the author, and left it at that. Some entries are a single paragraph, with others covering a couple of pages; as with most essay collections, some resonate with a reader more than others, but enough of these held my interest that the book earns four stars and a "definitely recommended" rating.

[Lela · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was such an easy book to read. It was a history of objects. Why do we hang on to some items and let others go? The things the author kept were so personal and not necessarily the beautiful things that came into her life but the loved objects or objects from those she loved or who loved her. Things with a memory attached. I looked around my rooms and wished I had thought of it first!

[Traci · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was amazing. The author uses objects as markers on the road map of her life, while trying to heal from the loss of her mother. I laughed out loud & broke into tears several times while reading it. Even though my life is vastly different from hers, I could empathize with many of her experiences and found many parallels to my own. The story is heart wrenching and warming at the same time.

[Patricia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really liked this one in its simplicity. It's an easy read, another plus for summer days at my house. The author tells of simple off-the-wall objects in her possession, tells us where she got them, the circumstances, and why they're important in her life. But it's more than that. Her short little essays are often thought provoking - What's important in MY life? As you might guess, it's nothing expensive. Nothing fancy. It's the broken this or that. The found object. The cheap item. The impulsive gift. They're precious to her because they combine to make elements of her life. We all have objects like that. Nice to know that other people hang on to precious memories, too.

[Morgan · Rating 2 out of 5]

one person described this book as having "economical prose". While I agree with that statement, to me, in this book, that translates to not very interesting reading. I had high hopes for this book and it was disappointing. There were a few bright moments, like the last sentence of the last story. Actually, the last store in general was good. But, that's all I really remember and I only finished the book yesterday.

[Sherri · Rating 2 out of 5]

The book had a great premise about the sentimentality of objects but other than that, nothing tied the book together. Overall, lacked flow. Some of the items were off the wall and I was wondering why as a reader, I would even care about other people's stuff if I didn't find the the story behind it interesting. I read several passages to my husband and he agreed that it was not convincing and not particularly interesting.

[Cheri · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not my cup of tea. This book contains the author's memories about objects she held on to, but because every entry was so brief, no ideas were well developed. I kept reading (the book was very short) in the vain hope that everything would somehow come together. I'm sure it has meaning for the author, and perhaps for her family, but I don't see the appeal for other readers.

[Melanie Page · Rating 5 out of 5]

This review originally was published at Grab the Lapels.

A unique, quirky work, Dawn Raffel’s memoir of sorts is a quick and easy read. Basically, it’s made up of flash nonfiction, which I’ve never seen before. Each piece is about an object. Raffel may include backstory on how the piece was acquired or what it reminds her of. There are even some objects that remind her of other objects, or missing objects. While this description may not interest you, I was surprised by how quickly the story of objects turns into the story of who Raffel is. Thus, readers begin to think of their own objects and who they are.

There seems to be a sort of timeline in the book. Early flash pieces are about objects her grandparents used to own. She moves into things from her parents, then friends, then objects she’s had since her children were babies. In the end, Raffel’s parents are deceased, so some of the objects come from their house. Others may argue there isn’t a clear progression, but what I noticed made the book seem to have a plot, which I enjoyed. The book read in an orderly fashion.

The pieces aren’t repetitive. Some of them are connected, such as “a prayer book, inscribed to [her father] on his Bar Mitzvah by his paternal grandparents” and her mother’s Bible, “small, white, leather-bound, gilded at the edges.” These two books may seem simple, but they provide opportunity for Raffel to discuss her parents’ faith. While her father “would cheerfully describe himself as a born-again atheist,” and Raffel didn’t even know her father had been religious, let alone had a Bar Mitzvah, her mother wouldn’t leave home without her Bible, even for one night.

Other flash nonfiction pieces begin to paint a picture of Raffel’s relatives over the course of the book. For example, Grandpa Raffel. He gives the author a vase that he had bought from a man during the Depression. Even though Grandpa Raffel was poor, the man was suffering because his wife had committed suicide and needed money. Later, we learn Grandpa Raffel owns a furniture store. He’s Jewish, but he puts up a small China Christmas tree merely as “a business decision” because “customers expect it.” The stories we learn about her grandparents help readers make sense of what Dawn Raffel’s parents chose to do in their lives, and then we have more context for the author and her own children.

Even several stories about vases isn’t boring. Readers get the story of a vase given to Raffel by her 101-year-old grandfather, a vase from a college boyfriend, and a vase that was had been part of a pair (she left the second vase behind) that she took from her deceased mother’s home. Though each flash piece is short by design, readers are encouraged to consider their own objects and ask questions. Do I keep things from old boyfriends? Do I have anything that’s very old? What would I keep from my parents’ house when they pass on? If you are a fan of graphic novels, these are questions that overwhelm Roz Chast when she discovers her parents have never thrown anything away.

The only part I found odd about The Secret Life of Objects were the drawings included with some flash pieces. They were made by Raffel’s son Sean Evers, whom I believe is now in his early 20s, but still they look like children’s drawings. If Evers did draw them as a boy, that would be good to know. Otherwise, I would have taken great pleasure in see photos of each object instead. See examples of the drawings below. Also, you can see about how long each flash piece is (usually one paragraph to 2-3 pages).

A quick, satisfying read, I highly recommend The Secret Life of Objects.

[Claudia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was such an easy read and such a meaningful read. As I do with any book, I read the reviews after reading, and was kinda surprised to see a lot of negative reviews. The most common complaint was none of the objects connected to each other, and to those people, I don’t think you were thinking when you were thinking at all while reading. The whole point is that these objects that don’t SEEM to relate, all have meaning and relationships to the author and to each other. My favorite chapters were series of the teacup, rose colored glasses, soap, and seconds. All seemingly random objects, connected by the idea of fading relationships, lifelong friends and friends she only knew for three days, all still having meaningful impacts on her. The author seamlessly jumps through time, starting almost chronologically in this series of chapters from college, to graduation, a fun foreign trip before settling down, and her first years as a mother. Each chapter starts in this chronology and later skips through time, to her present day or years later. If you think the objects don’t have a connection, you weren’t paying attention. I loved this book, it’s one of those books I had to read for class and dreaded because I hate being forced to read, but ended up loving because it was so powerful. People were super mean in their reviews so I’m gonna to be mean in return: you’re fucking stupid and need to go back to elementary school if you think there’s no relationships between the books. Super fun read if you have at least 5 brain cells, apparently.

[Sabeeha Rehman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant! A memoir in short-stories. Some are only a page in length, and leave you stunned, reflective, and emotionally shaken. Beautifully constructed, Dawn Raffel reveals her emotions and her connection with material objects & the memories they evoke, memories that are sometimes vivid, sometimes not quite memorable, and sometimes faulty. Deeply touching, and so very real.

[Pamela A. Walker · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this memoir for its simplicity -- form and language -- and for its ingeniousness of 1-2 page character studies of objects that tell Raffel's life story. It's as if the object studies have arms that reach out to embrace and treat you to one writer's experience of love and complexity in urban America.

[J. A. Lewis · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a quick and easy read about the various objects from Ms. Raffel's life that were found while going through her mother's keepsakes after her death. Various objects bring up different memories and while some were tossed, others were kept as treasures that are often ignored and packed away.

[Glo · Rating 5 out of 5]

short and sweet

I liked this book .The chapters could be short or long and each time it was like a little surprise for me, the reader! The tiniest parts of a chapter could make my eyes swell with tears -both joyful and sad tears. The “objects” spoke to me and I felt a part of something.

[Susan Sanderson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Unlike many other reviewers, I liked this book. I am a fan of short vignettes and this book filled that slot. The items told a story of her family and life. Yes the order seemed somewhat random but i the end it all tied together.

[Luanne Castle · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a wonderful idea for the structure of a memoir. Well done.

[M.K.B. Graham · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy, sentimental read that reminds us that objects come with deep and enduring memories.

[Yaaresse · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a charming book of memories triggered by the objects in the author's life. Most of the entries are brief -- often a page, sometimes just a paragraph. It reads like an ongoing conversation, the kind you might have if you stopped by a friend or relative's house while they were (pretending to) clean out their desk or the spare room closet.

The entries appear random at first, but I noticed that they form a theme: how the things we chose to keep (or pack away) are often tied with some part of ourselves or our relationships that we might not use anymore, but aren't quite ready to let go of yet. Perhaps we hold on to years of accumulated gewgaws and trinkets because we're afraid cleaning out the physical closets will lead to cleaning out our memories' closets?

This simple book almost becomes simplistic. The sentiment almost becomes mushy and saccharine. Had the book been any longer, it could well have gone from enjoyable to grating (if not trite). I think the author (or her editor) was smart to keep the book short and formatted so it could be read in small bites or at random.

Although the author doesn't say so, I think one of the points of the book -- aside from a remembrance of her parents and grandparents -- is to encourage readers to take a look at the things we surround ourselves with and enjoy (even laugh at) the stories behind them.

[Kim Olson · Rating 2 out of 5]

High expectations are a killer. A while back, I read that this book would change the way I looked at everyday objects. It certainly didn't do that, but anyway, I'm always up for a good collection of short stories.

This is a series of autobiographical stories, each using an object in the author's life--a wooden rocking chair, a jewelry box, a teacup--as a kicking-off point for sharing an anecdote about her life. I do like Raffel's writing style, lyrical and effortless. But the device simply didn't work for me. Some of the objects have significant meaning, others much less. In some stories, she mentions the object at the beginning of the piece, then diverges to share her story, and I had completely forgotten about the object until it was abruptly reintroduced at the close. I really enjoyed some of the stories, but many were the types of stories than any of us could tell from our own lives. In one (very short, two-paragraph) chapter, she tells us that she found some of her mother's lost jewelry in a trash bag in the back of a closet. That's it. That's all she says about it. I think this book could have been culled by half or more.

[Joanne Clarke Gunter · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a charming little book and one like I have thought of writing myself, especially since the deaths of my parents. Many objects in our homes have sentimental stories attached to them; some sad stories, some happy, some regretful. Dawn Raffel weaves an illuminating little story about a number of objects in her home; a mug, a jewelry box, a prayer book, her father's hat, among others. Some of the stories are only a short paragraph in length, but all of them draw the reader in and make you think not only of her sentimental objects and their personal histories, but of your own. I found myself thinking of, among other things, a beautiful blue Murano glass vase I bought in Venice, Italy and gave to my mother many years ago which, since her death last year, now sits on top of a book shelf in my home where I can see it every day. I don't think I have ever read a book quite like this one and it was a joy to realize how interesting and emotional it can be to remember the stories connected to the treasures of our lives. This is a wonderful little book.

[Jess · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am the complete opposite of he author and HATE unnecessary clutter or holding on to items that I don't think I will use again, so it was really interesting for me to see how much history is actually kept in the houses of people who 'hoard' (when compared to me anyway). Reading about it sort of made me feel guilty that I haven't kept hold of more family heritage - I went through the house and the only thing I could find from my grandparents was a couple of old books that my Nan gave me before she passed away.

This is the kind of book I would like to write when I am older before I pass away. What a great moment it would be for your children and grandchildren - and it would be interesting to see how much of the history they actually knew before you wrote it down.

Having said that I don't think I would ever read this book again, it was interesting and different but I like my story lines with a little more depth and character.

[Kristi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've been described more than once as a person who attaches to things. Heritage in my family is largely connect to objects passed down by generations. When I see an object I connect to the stories it might tell about the people of its past, the way it connects me to them. Or, to the stories it will tell about me and my life. I'm a sentimentalist; a material culturalist; an intuitional curator in training to be a professional curator. I very much related to this book.
In this series of short stories - a page, or no more than three - about the personal artifacts of Raffel's life, the meaning of objects unfolds; the roles objects fill in connecting us to our loved ones, to moments in our lives or theirs, and ultimately, the stories that objects tell about our lives within the stories we tell about objects. Simple, but profound.

[Diane Lybbert · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is a sort of memoir/essay series. When I read a promo for the book in a women's magazine recently, I thought it was specifically about items that had belonged to her mother. After her mother died, she was going through her things. But, a few of the essays are about her mother's things, the rest are about other items in the author's life. I had expected the memories to be more poignant and emotional than they were. She chooses random things, some of which don't really hold that much meaning for her. A few of the essays are insightful, but most (to me) were not. It was a quick read, as each chapter was only a few pages long. Maybe I expected too much. I enjoyed the book, it was a relaxing read, but it didn't move me.

[Katie Shockley · Rating 3 out of 5]

When I first read a review on this book I thought it was going to be a story narrated by objects. A story through an object's point of view. Instead imagine helping an old friend pack and they share the stories behind each item. At first I thought I was going to have a hard time getting into the book, almost like reading a very bland diary; then I took the time to reflect on items throughout my life that stand out our have been passed on. I was able to connect with those emotions and get lost in nostalgia. It ended up being a sweet treasure.

[Christina · Rating 4 out of 5]

With the recent passing of my grandfather I felt compelled to read this book. I could relate to it...how certain "objects" around your house can hold secrets & tell a story. I've aquired a lot of my grandparents things that have wonderful, funny & sometimes crazy stories attached to them. Now I can pass those memories on & keep the stories alive. This book, though extremely unique...resonated very heavily with me & I felt it very calming to read the stories about these objects because my family was doing the same thing.

[Rach · Rating 3 out of 5]

I was hoping that it was written more like a narrative, but instead it is several very short stories of objects within her home. Each one though gives you a brief snapshot of her life and places and experiences she's had. Some are very touching and thoughtful. It makes me look around the room and wonder what stories are tied into the little items tucked in cornors, or random things tacked to the wall or stuck to the shelves. Someone may walk in and think "Why is there a penny taped to the light switch?" :)

[Debby Palmer · Rating 4 out of 5]

For awhile I didn't think I'd finish the book, but I'm glad I did. In the beginning I found the stories of the objects mildly interesting, but disconnected and somehow devoid of emotion; I wasn't really engaged. As I went along, though, the stories grew richer, more meaningful, and more cohesive. By the end, it felt like the true story of a life through objects. The diversity of objects--quotidian, exotic, whole, broken, faded, distant, discarded, essential--coalesce into an apt metaphor for the unmatched fragments of a full life.