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256 pages, Paperback
First published August 23, 2023
you stink of blood and shit,
you stink of sleep and hunger,
a child could kill you with one punch,
he counts the days since he left the city. Since his flight from the barracks. Four days since he launched the vehicle into the ravine…
I have to go back over what happened over twenty years ago, on 11 September 2001, near Potsdam on the Havel, on board the cruise boat, a little river liner christened with the fine pompous name Beethoven.
…bodies falling from the windows, towers collapsing, crowds running to escape the impenetrable clouds of dust as if emerging from the gates of hell.
Shadows are overtaking everything, the lower part of the walls are already in darkness,
I'll curl up in the dark until I disappear, and when daylight comes they ll already be gone,
she knows that's not what will happen,
there is no star in the sky and she senses that these voices that are combining are combining against her, that no one is on her side, that her side does not exist, if she wasn't wounded she could have tried to flee, descend the long steep path with the taste of abyss and sweat,
my heart, it is echoing its machine-gun beat through the whole mountain my mouth is dry, I'm cold, ever since the beginning of the war I've been cold, months and months of cold, I'll leave for the north to escape the freezing cold of the sea, of the city, of the country, the women who were with me that day didn't want to leave, they paid, they said, they paid with their bodies and their shame they paid they can stay, stay shorn, stay raped, stay soiled, stay in the stable, in the intense cold of the stable, the absolute cold of war that will last for years to come, at night, in everyone's sleep, torturers and tortured,
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