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The Red Book

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Clover, Addison, Mia, and Jane were roommates at Harvard until their graduation in 1989.

Twenty years later, their lives are in free fall. Clover, once a securities broker, is out of a job and struggling to reproduce before her fertility window shuts. Addison's marriage to a writer's-blocked novelist is as stale as her so-called career as a painter. Hollywood closed its gold-plated gates to Mia, who now stays home with her children, renovating and acquiring faster than her husband can pay the bills. Jane, the Paris bureau chief for a newspaper whose foreign bureaus are now shuttered, is caught in a vortex of loss.

Like all Harvard grads, they've kept abreast of one another via the red book, a class report published every five years, containing alumni autobiographical essays. But there's the story we tell the world, and then there's the real story, as these former classmates will learn during their twentieth reunion, a relationship-changing, score-settling, unforgettable weekend.

368 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2012

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4350 people want to read

About the author

Deborah Copaken Kogan

7 books111 followers

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 774 reviews
Profile Image for Emily Crowe.
356 reviews133 followers
February 22, 2012
Ugh, what a disappointment! First of all, I was expecting non-fiction, but that's my fault for not knowing enough about the book when I picked it up. But more importantly, I was expecting something with a LOT more substance than this book has. I read her first book, Shutterbabe, which was the story of her time as a photojournalist in war-torn countries, and it was just great. Reading Red Book makes me feel as if the author has somehow sold out, leaving behind her heavy-hitting stories for a group of suburban mother Harvard grads returning for a reunion. It teeters dangerously on the brink of being one of those, "oh, it's so hard to be a white person of privilege" books. I didn't quite manage to finish this one 'cause I was pretty sure that I'd just want to throw the book across the room if I did.

Marketing is calling this book "The Big Chill for the Facebook generation." I don't think so.

Profile Image for switterbug (Betsey).
936 reviews1,493 followers
April 3, 2012
The “red book” is an anniversary chronicle that is passed to Harvard alumni every five years, asking them for basic information, such as address, email, occupation, spouse/partner, children, if any, and a concise summary of the past half-decade of their lives. The author uses this framework to enlarge on these capsulized lives of several 1989 graduates, and constructs an ensemble comedy/drama that entertains as it engages, moves while it thrills.

The central story focuses on four women who graduated together—Addison, Clover, Mia, and Jane. Secondary and tertiary characters include spouses, lovers, friends, children, and other graduates that fill in the spaces and paint a portrait of a once close-knit community that has diverged over the past two decades. As the twenty-year reunion in Cambridge approaches, certain lives are headed toward catastrophe, some are on a precipice, and many are headed into serious change.

Addison is stuck in a static marriage with a thoughtless, selfish man who barely helped raise their kids. Clover struggles with fertility issues and an employment problem. Her banking career went belly-up with the 2008 economic collapse, and her husband refuses to squirt in a specimen cup. Mia is happily married to a prominent, much older Hollywood director, has two teenagers and a new baby, but is blind to the truth of their assets.

Jane, a widow and successful journalist, lived in Paris with her daughter and boyfriend until he betrayed her trust while she was in Boston caring for her terminally ill mother. Jane knew grief at a tender age—she was a Vietnamese child orphan, a casualty of war, then adopted by Americans. She is about to discover some harsh realities about her late husband and some shocking revelations about her (adoptive) mother as she meets up with old classmates and attempts to close a house full of memories—and secrets.

In lesser hands, this could be a stale, derivative soap opera with candy-coated characters. But Kogan breathes oxygen into this big Chill-Fire-Breakfast forty-something tale of overlapping lives, gathering friends (and adversaries), and familiar themes of loss, love, and redemption. There are a few expedient twists, but they are authentic to the story and cast. Some readers will complain that the pace is pokey, but I thoroughly enjoyed the languid clip; it inevitably picks up at just the right moments.

The book’s strength rests on the author’s style and narrative arrangement. She cross-pollinates her characters and their individual stories, creating fresh knots of tension and torsion. Resentments acquired during college re-emerge when characters clash on common ground; old love affairs have new influence; buried feelings are exposed; confessions lead to transformation. As the reader, you alternate from active participation in the story’s events, to being a beady-eyed observer, to inhabiting the characters emotionally.

Kogan commands us with an almost imperceptible subtlety—you don’t recognize the mental shifts until later, when you realize that the story’s power pivots on its structure. The philosophical digressions loop back, the long sentences undulate in the chambers of its heart. The author stands back, with her verbal camera, mastering the narrative aperture. The light slants through her prose, or demurs to darkness falling on the page.

“Narrative is much less about the facts of the tale itself—who did what where when, and why…than it is about how the narrator frames the story, what she feels about the story, when she chooses to tell it, where and why she tells it…”
Profile Image for Nette.
635 reviews70 followers
April 24, 2012
Hugely disappointing. I was looking forward to well-written, juicy old-fashioned "four girls from college reconnect" novel (believe me, it's an actual genre) but this one's big mess. Look, if you're writing a novel about four separate individuals and giving four different POVs, do not make each woman sound EXACTLY THE SAME. Never mind the bad writing, it's really confusing for the reader.

The tone veers from drama to comedy (sort of) but not in a good way. There's a lot of weirdly gross detail about poopy toilets, used condoms, internet porn and breast milk. The bit that really sent me over the edge was when the 14-year-old daughter of one of the women schemes to attend concerts by "Dismembered Fetus" and "Vaginal Discharge," band names that would have been utterly lame in 1979 and would be laughed off the stage today.

Profile Image for Elaine.
961 reviews488 followers
July 29, 2017
There's chick lit, and then there's drivel. This was the latter. Badly written, badly plotted, and preachy to boot? can't even really explain why I read it, except that it was on my Kindle and I wanted something "light". Feel sort of tawdry now. This type of book can be a frothy delight - see for example the Liane Moriarity I just read. And what woman who grew up in the 80s will ever forget Lace ("which one of you bitches is my mother?") or Judith Krantz or her trashy British doppelganger Jilly Cooper? Felt like Kogan was inspired to try to recreate something like that for the contemporary zeitgeist but clunk clunk clunk, this pretty much failed.
Profile Image for Diane.
845 reviews78 followers
May 28, 2012
I had never heard of Harvard's Red Book before I recently read Deborah Copaken Kogan's novel, The Red Book. Every five years, Harvard compiles a book filled with short essays written by each graduate, sharing what they have been up to in the past five years.

The actual Red Book made headlines recently when infamous graduate Ted Kazcynski, the man known to the world as the Unabomber, returned his questionnaire listing his occupation as 'prisoner' and under the awards section, wrote 'eight life sentences', and his entry was included in the book, angering many people including his victims' families.

None of this has anything to do with Kogan's book, but perhaps the timely story will bring some publicity to this wonderful novel. Kogan takes the popular concept of four female protagonists (Little Women, Sex & the City, J. Courtney Sullivan's 2011 novel Maine), and adds a dash of The Big Chill (one of my favorite movies) that brought me to tears by the end of this emotional story.

Cleverly using the conceit of the Red Book, she introduces her four main characters with their 20 year entries. Sometimes books with multiple protagonists can lead to confusion keeping everyone straight, and by introducing in this manner, that problem is solved.

We are thrust into the lives, their marriages, their children, their careers, what they have been doing since college. Addison has put her career as an artist on hold to raise her three children and support her husband, a writer who doesn't seem to do much writing (or any parenting).

Clover was a huge success at Lehman Brothers, until they went under. Now she is unemployed and trying unsuccessfully to have a child with her husband, a Legal Aid attorney.

Mia went to LA after college to try and make it as an actress. She met an older man, Jonathan, a successful director and they have four children and a good life, with homes in LA and the Antibes. She and Jonathan are deeply in love, but what she doesn't know is that they took a big financial hit during the recession.

Jane is a reporter for the Boston Globe, based in France. Her first husband was killed while reporting in Afghanistan. She has a daughter with him and is now living with her husband's best friend. Her adopted mother recently passed away after a long illness, and Jane is bereft.

The four women all meet up again at the 20th reunion, bringing their families with them, except for Clover. Clover runs into an old flame and has a plan that unwittingly involves him . Addison ends up in serious trouble for unpaid parking tickets and her old lover, a wealthy woman, comes to rescue.

Jane is trying to decide whether to move back to the United States to write a novel, and has to face infidelities from her partner. Mia wants to return to acting.

Being back in Cambridge brings back memories for all of them, and causes some of them to reflect on their regrets, the things they should have done. The story culminates at a memorial service for a classmate, and all of the emotions of the weekend coming crashing down around them.

I really liked the relationship between Mia and Jonathan. Their marriage is solid and loving, and the scene where Jonathan comforts an upset Jane is so tender and moving.

Two of the families have teenage children, and a romance between them ensues. Kogan writes the scenes with the teens with empathy and insight, and I liked that the kids weren't one-dimensional. Their story was important as well.

Some books you love right away, this was one that took me awhile to get into, but by the end, when Kogan takes a character down a road that I was not happy about, I actually said "NO!" when I saw it coming, and almost cursed her. That is how much I was invested in this story, in this particular character. I love getting lost in a good story, and I was enveloped in this engrossing book.

My husband loves movies where at the end they tell you what happens to the characters, and this novel ends like it begins: we read the 25th anniversary report and find out how things have turned out.
Profile Image for Valentina.
Author 36 books176 followers
March 12, 2012
I’m ambivalent about this book. This is not the usual for me, so bear with me while I try to make some sense of my own thoughts.
The premise, I think, is fantastic. A bunch of Harvard alumni coming together for their twentieth reunion, bringing with them their lives, loves, children, and emotional baggage. It could have been a profoundly moving book, but somewhere in there it began to lose some of its wit and spark. I think the main problem is that the characters are all quite unlikeable. It seems like the author wanted to reduce them down to the lowest denominator, making them babbling idiots. I understand that this might just been the point the author was trying to make, but, if so, it was not executed as well as it should have.
It seemed almost childish the way Ms. Kogan fixated on the sex lives of her creations. I get it, sex is important, but I expected something a bit deeper, more meaningful than parents freaking out over their teenage children having sex. I think there are more important things to write about. I respect a well crafted, necessary sex scene, but not all of the ones in this book fit that criteria.
And see, the thing is, that there were many nice moments in the book. Some really pretty phrases that struck a chord in me, which makes it even worse, because this book had real potential. It’s frustrating because I would like to recommend it, for those phrases, and those moments, but they’re in the middle of all the rest. Oh, and the last line is cringe worthy in all its clichéd glory.
I guess, all I can say is if you have time to spare, this might not be a bad choice.
Profile Image for Cathy Mcd.
3 reviews
April 12, 2012
Somewhat enjoyable look behind the curtain at Harvard. Few characters to care about, but the ones about whom you did care, were barely fleshed out and were not provided a decent end to their story arc. Set-ups to major plot points were so obvious that by the time you got to that part of the book, you are already over it and have moved on to whatever it is that gave you hope for a climactic end.

Bottom line: if you like you stories about overly self absorbed Ivy league twats who, while facing their version of personally tragedy, still overcome and end up as more fabulous versions of their slightly tarnished selves. Hard to feel their pain and luckily this book had so little heft and very little to ponder, that you will finish it quickly and promptly forget the names of any of the characters, and even more tragically for the author, her name and the name of the book...Had to find both on my Kindle, and then delete the book.

Two stars are because I am homesick for Boston and the Sox!
Profile Image for Jessica Knauss.
Author 35 books68 followers
April 4, 2012
The Red Book was hard for me to get into because it starts with the least sympathetic character, then proceeds to introduce a number of characters it's nearly impossible to keep track of, hopping in and out of all their heads like an especially psychologically perceptive housefly. By the tenth page, I had decided that, in spite of my interest in Ivy League culture and love of Boston, I was not the right audience for this book. But I'm not a reader who gives up easily, and I found that by the middle of the book, when we start to see some of the more meaningful revelations, I was well-trained in jumping between the characters' perspectives, and by the end, the technique actually worked in the story's favor. Not a Harvard alum, I've never read a "red book," so was skeptical as to whether the personal essays were realistic, but they served as convenient character guides when I just couldn't figure out who was who otherwise.

I haven't read any of the author's other books, but she does have some clout coming in, and by the time I was three-quarters of the way through, I had decided she had enough psychological depth to carry off what she was trying to do. I ended up really enjoying the way she takes each character and implies big themes about that character's stage in life. I never did sympathize with that first character, Addison. However, her story arc included a really terrible husband who was echoed lightly in one of the others, and both husbands left the picture. That contributed to the satisfying sense that in spite of all the things that have gone so terribly, everybody's going to be just fine.

This book about Harvard alums will astonish with the incredible range of life experience it manages to pack in, and give book clubs in particular a lot to talk about.
1 review2 followers
September 10, 2016
I read this one recent Sunday...began in the afternoon and did not put it down until I finished at two in the morning....a lovely and rare indulgence. I found the failures and triumphs of these women poignant, beautifully described...and relevant. Yes they are privileged, but oh so very human. Kogan's ability to describe moments of intimate human interaction shimmers. Enjoy...
Profile Image for Nicole.
1,159 reviews12 followers
April 24, 2012
What fun--a book about people my age who were much, much smarter in high school. (It's well-written, and enjoyable so far.)

I liked this book, particularly the interesting way of telling the stories (making use of the Red Book). A lot of Gen X cliche, but one part in particular bothered me in its predictability. I did enjoy the characters, though this method of writing about them didn't allow for a large amount of depth. It would be interesting to have had a bit more.
1,435 reviews1 follower
July 15, 2012
Terrific writing; likeable, complex characters; and an anti-Puritanical morality that I didn't quite mesh with. This was a fascinating account of four friends and their families as they meet up for Harvard's 20th reunion. Amazing how much happens over a three day weekend. This is the book that Seating Arrangements was trying to be, but this one actually succeeds: telling the story of looking back on life lived, and looking forward to how to continue living that life.

Great book, even if I did probably miss out on all the Harvard references.

Profile Image for Vicki Oleskey.
8 reviews2 followers
March 8, 2012
It’s the 20th reunion at Harvard for a group of diverse women friends whom we meet initially through their “Red Book” entries. This could have been a run of the mill novel but it is anything but. It’s a terrifically intelligent and funny novel with sharp observations about family, friendship, death, aging, secrets and infidelity. All the characters were very genuine and the dialogue natural, making for a thumbs up reading experience
Profile Image for Cheri.
258 reviews17 followers
February 4, 2012
This book was wonderful! Even though there were many characters introduced throughout, it wasn't confusing and I felt like I got to know each one. I actually laughed and cried as I read The Red Book, and would recommend it to anyone who enjoys a character-driven story.
Profile Image for Mandy.
267 reviews12 followers
June 9, 2013
At first, I thought 'Ooh, I quite liked this' but the more it sat with me, the angrier I got about it. A strange reaction perhaps, but I felt disappointed by the predictability of the plot.

The red book of the title refers to the red book that is sent out before every Harvard reunion, filled with everyone's updates for the past five years. Every entry includes the basic stats: name, address, contact, spouse/kids etc, as well as a little paragraph or two explaining where they're at. Considering that this happens every five years, some of the entries seemed really detailed, which is more for our benefit than realism. This is the first hint that this is more 'women's fiction' than literary fiction. It's neat and tidy, with no surprises and everything spelled out for the reader.

The story itself follows a group of friends and hangers-on from the 1989 class - Mia (now married to Jonathan, a famous director and fabulously wealthy, or so we are led to believe), Jane (amazingly naive for a journalist based in Paris with a child), Clover (desperate for a child and married to a younger man who we never actually meet), and Addison (a closet lesbian married to a dreadful man with three awful kids). They've kept in touch over the years and yet this reunion weekend seems to be a catalyst for everything changing in their lives. How convenient!

Each chapter is told from a different point of view, which can end up being really disjointed, while at the same time, the signposts to the action and plot are very obvious. For example, Jane holds her adoptive parents and her first husband on a pedestal, believing that none of them every cheated or made any mistakes in their lives and so she judges her new partner for his mistake and everyone else as well. Well, shock! horror! when she discovers that she was wrong, they weren't perfect, and she forgives everyone. How neat and tidy. And don't get me started on Addison and Gunner's marriage - the typical bad marriage with no redeeming qualities at all, which only serves to highlight how she should have stayed with her lesbian girlfriend instead - the girlfriend who is amazing and perfect, of course.

And when the supposedly SHOCKING twist at the end comes and a character dies, it was bloody obvious the whole way through and especially as you start reading that chapter. I ended up skimming it just to get to the point. And this is where the book should have ended if it had any allusions of being literary fiction. But no, Kogan can't help herself and she includes the Red Book entries for all the characters for the next reunion, nicely summing up what happened to everyone. Wouldn't you know it, they all ended up with the people they should have, doing what they love (except for Mia, who had it good initially) and everything turned out right. There's no mystery, there's no space for the reader to imagine anything.

Still, the book gets 2 stars, since it's well-written and the characters, while being pretty cliche, are consistent and well-characterised generally (it's only the supporting cast that are entirely one-dimensional). I didn't hate it while I was reading it but, considering I found it via the Women's Prize for Fiction shortlist, I had higher expectations.
Profile Image for Jill Meyer.
1,188 reviews121 followers
August 3, 2021
I bought and read "The Red Book", by Deborah Copaken Kogan, on the advise of some good friends - (Hi Betz and Bonnie!) - and was really not expecting much. Oh, maybe a four star look at the typical group of old college buddies - peopled with the standard WASP, Jewish, black, and Asian characters - each described with the short-hand caricatures of age-old womens' novels. And it was set at Harvard, no less, where everyone starts out brilliant!

But Kogan's novel was a much deeper, better written book than any of the genre I've read before. She cleverly and deftly draws her four main characters - Harvard grads who are reuniting for their 20th year reunion - with nary a caricature. (Except, maybe, the WASP character's name. I mean, "Addison Cornwall Hunt"?) By using the form of entries written for the class "Red Book" which describe each character from the basics of address, spouse/partner, job, children, and then going into what has happened since the previous "Red Book" entry five years previously, Kogan is masterful in her introduction to Addison, Mia, Clover, and Jane. But Kogan doesn't end with the main characters. She draws her secondary characters - in most cases family members of the four - as well as other Harvard alumni, who she also sketches by using the "Red Book" entries.

Set in those financially shaky days of June 2009, the four women return to Boston for their 20th reunion. All are involved in relationships - some shaky, some strong - and they are accompanied by their significant others and their children. The women are also accompanied by secrets; secrets they're holding off from each other and from their loved ones. Some secrets are of a financial nature and others are of more personal and intimate nature. As the weekend unfolds, those secrets and the love they feel for each other is displayed.

This is a book with not one false step in either plot or character development. Not one. It's simply a well-written book about interesting characters, drawn by an author with a firm hand. Excellent in every way.
Profile Image for Susie.
Author 1 book19 followers
August 4, 2012
"I am stronger than I thought I was and weaker than I'd hoped to be, and in between those two extremes is a little thing like life."

Four friends, roommates in college, come back to their twentieth year reunion at Harvard. All of them struggling with their own personal crises, and all of them helping and hurting themselves, their friends, and their children in the process. Kogan carefully navigates the banalities of four women's lives and gives an introspective to being a "40 something" so interesting that it was difficult to put the book down.

I can't tell how much I enjoyed this book. Everything about it spoke to me, as a married, working woman, a mother, a college graduate, and a woman that sometimes feels like she failed on her life goals. I see how some reader's make the comparison to the movie "The Big Chill" but I have to say it's so much more than that. I was fully invested in each one of these characters and felt the sway of all their lives, making comparisons to my own life that were almost painful. I didn't want it to end, but to have the lives of these characters go on and on. And it's not simply because of the writing, nor the addictive nature of being a voyeur to the insane marriages of the story. I realize that my love of these characters is in fact that they are in the exact same place I am in my life, (age and life experience) and Kogan is putting into writing the same confusion I feel on about the "authenticity" of my own life.

Am I living up to the promises I made to myself? Am I living a full life? Is this where I wanted to be, when I imagined my life in those innocent, egotistical, colorful moments of my collegiate career? I don't know, but It makes you ask yourself those questions. And in between that, you find yourself praying, hoping, cheering on the characters.

Profile Image for Virginia Campbell.
1,282 reviews350 followers
July 19, 2016
There are three inescapable truths about human beings: the way we see ourselves, the way we are perceived by others, and the way we actually exist. A twenty-year class reunion is the perfect venue to display all three views, as the attendees meet, mix, mingle and migrate through survival of the event. In "The Red Book", Deborah Copaken Kogan serves us a slice of Harvard Pie, as the lives of four roommates from the class of '89 are detailed and given a fortyish mid-life checkup as they reunite after two decades. Harvard, venerable institution that it remains, requests its alumni to update their lives on file every five years, and the results are compiled into a red-covered anniversary report which is sent to every graduate. Kogan's story line begins with the Twentieth Anniversary Report for the class of '89, and its final chapter is the report for the Twenty-Fifth Anniversary. In between these reports, the lives of the four roomies, Addison, Clover, Mia, and Jane, and those around them, are sketched out in sharp lines, vivid hues, and subtle shadings. Since this is a Harvard Pie, the slices are served in grand style, but the ingredients for the recipe are basic. All human beings, regardless of social status and financial state, are made of common elements, just varying in levels of intensity. You may see something of yourself in Kogan's characters, or you may see yourself as an outside observer, but the fascination remains the same. Greener grass still needs to be weeded. Not all of the characters are likeable, but they are quite readable, and that makes "The Red Book" a delicious dish indeed.

Review Copy Gratis Library Thing
Profile Image for Marion.
234 reviews13 followers
May 4, 2012
Though I did not know about "The Red Book" (Harvard alumni publication) before picking up this book at the library, I was immediately drawn to it because (1) I graduated from college in 1989, the same year as the alums in this book (at their 20th reunion) and (2) I worked at private schools and wrote and edited class notes for alumnae/alumni publications. I found this to be a fun and enjoyable read, and eventually bought it for my e-reader. (Yes, library books do create book/e-sales.) I think it was Adam Gopnik who said on the jacket copy It's "The Big Chill" for the Facebook generation. I pretty much agree. It had a definite soap-opera feel - A LOT happens to this relatively small cast of characters in very short order. I laughed out loud at the $100,000 fine from parking tickets ignored for 20 years. I was struck by the concept of going to a college reunion - I went to a giant state university and have never considered going to a college reunion, nor would I (though I keep in touch with a few college friends), but I can compare it to my small-town high school in which a large percentage of our 109-member class, not to mention some of our former teachers, are Facebook friends and cheer each other on through the ups and downs of life. I appreciated that the author filled in so many of the details of what happened to the characters later in life. Loved the ending paragraph.
Profile Image for Lorie Kleiner Eckert.
Author 9 books11 followers
June 7, 2013
I really loved this author's previous book, Between Here and April, and so I was eager to read this new book and then I was very disappointed when I read it. Though there were only four main characters, and two of the four had distinctively different backgrounds, it was still very difficult to keep the characters straight. And then add on their children, their spouses, their old college friends and so forth and the cast of characters got way out of control.

The "Red Book" itself, is the book Harvard puts out in advance of reunions. In it, classmates of the given year are asked to write 3 to 5 paragraphs about their lives since the last reunion. So a lot of information about a lot of the characters was given in this manner. When it comes to revealing characters in a book, the author can show or the author can tell the information. I prefer to be shown. The reunion book entries forced the author to tell instead.

Also, the author tended to speak a lot in parenthesis or between double dashes giving me even more info about things that did not interest me in the first place.

After 344 pages I can say I really did not care about any of the characters and even the author's acknowledgments at the end of the book rubbed me the wrong way making me not care for her either!
Profile Image for Heidi | Paper Safari Book Blog.
1,142 reviews21 followers
May 2, 2013
So many of us try to project that we have the perfect life, when in reality it is anything but. These four roomates are struggling, Jane with her boyfriend having cheated on her while she was away in the states, Clover with her husband's indifference with their struggle with infertility, Addison, with her rocky marriage and figuring out she has no attraction to her husband, and Mia whose life seems like a fairy tale but her husband is hiding a secret.

I have to be honest I thought the beginning of this book was a bit random and I wasn't quite sucked in right away but I found each story held something more, and I was right, I'm glad I kept reading. Life is messy and this book shows just that. The mixed emotions, the lies we tell ourselves, the relief when we forgive and move on, etc..its all there. Its a breakfast club for the 40-somethings. We thought that life was confusing in our 20's but sometimes its just as confusing in your 40's. Thats when you have to decide if you are going through life like a zombie or actually living. It would suck to go through the rest of life as a zombie..live, be joyful and play!
104 reviews
April 18, 2012
I couldn't decide between 3 or 4 stars, but judging the book on what is essentially is - a really good beach read - merits the 4 star treatment. Contrary to other reviewers, I did not find it too difficult to keep up with the many characters and in fact enjoyed the way the story was presented. Sure it doesn't allow for in depth character development, but that us not the purpose of this book. I also do not understand the reviews that complain of a lack of sympathetic characters. Given a choice between flawed normal people who make the same bad decisions people make every day and glorified, perfect people who sail through their completely undeserved tragedies, I will take the sinners every time. My big complaint as usual is the ending. I do not mind that it was completely obvious, I just wish it were more realistic. After making the point that the director was sure an audience would pay to watch a film without the happily ever after, I wish for once an author would give their readers the same credit.
10 reviews
June 10, 2024
It took me awhile to get into this book. I picked it up thinking it’d be a lighthearted “chic lit” read about 4 women’s lifelong friendships, and eventually realized it was deeper than that. At first I kept waiting for something big to happen - one major plot point or storyline that would draw me in - but the beauty of this book is simply how real it is, and how real everyone’s lives are. Grief, love, loss, regret, nostalgia, hope, authenticity - the author covers it all and she does so beautifully. This is one I would read again.
Profile Image for Cathryn Conroy.
1,411 reviews75 followers
March 15, 2025
What started out as an eye-rolling story about privileged, wealthy, entitled Harvard alumni going to their 20th reunion in 2009 morphed into a thoughtful, introspective, and smart novel about the ravages of time—of where we hoped to be in life by middle age versus where life's blows landed and what those blows did to us.

Four Harvard college roommates—Addison, Mia, Clover, and Jane—reunite in Cambridge for a weekend in June, along with their spouses, significant others, and children. They have kept in touch with each other and their classmates from the class of 1989 via "the red book," a publication that lists all the graduates and their accomplishments.

• Addison, who is a lesbian but couldn't imagine living life like that, is married to her prep school boyfriend, Gunner. She is an artist. He is a novelist, but he has only written one book that was published 10 years ago. They have three spoiled, bratty children. They live the high life all on his family's fortune. And guess what? His parents just invested all their money with Bernie Madoff. Poof! It's all gone. As if that's not enough to cause angst and stress, Addison's reunion weekend starts off horribly when she lands in jail for $100,000 in unpaid parking tickets she accumulated as a college student in Cambridge.

• Mia, a promising actress in her undergraduate days, is very happily married to Jonathan, a film director of romantic comedies. He is 18 years her senior, and they have four children, three boys and a newborn daughter named Zoe. Their children are polite, smart, kind, and compassionate. While Mia ponders all she personally and professionally gave up to be a stay-at-home mom, Jonathan is quietly worrying about their failing financial situation, reluctant to confide this to Mia.

• Clover, the mixed-race daughter of hippies who grew up on a remote commune, was laid off seven months ago from her high-paying job at Lehman Brothers when the 2008 housing industry crisis and recession hit full force. She is married to a man she loves, but he is incredibly self-centered. She desperately wants a baby—so much so that she'll do anything to get pregnant.

• Jane is a Vietnamese orphan, rescued as a child by an American physician and his wife. She has suffered so much loss in her life—first her entire family in Vietnam, then her adopted father, her husband, and her adopted mother. Jane is the mother of six-year-old Sophie, which is about the only thing holding her together. Jane makes some shocking discoveries during the reunion weekend—discoveries that rock her world and leave her staggering emotionally.

This is a time when long-held secrets come into the open, scores are settled, and relationships are forever changed. But it is also a time when all four roommates discover their authentic selves, and that is life-changing. The compelling plot points, the snappy dialogue, and the characters' wise and witty introspection make this a charming and insightful novel to read.

Bonus: Author Deborah Copaken Kogan, herself a Harvard graduate, has created her own version of Harvard's "red book" interspersed in the novel. Of course, the entries—each graduate writes a short essay—highlight all the alumni have accomplished, but what is missing from each entry is sometimes more telling. This may be the most entertaining and enlightening part of the book!

Granted, this is ChickLit and not award-winning literature, but it is a good read.
Profile Image for Lynne.
611 reviews88 followers
July 10, 2024
There were parts of this book that made me cringe…. The name of the band groups that the teenagers were listening to for one. I couldn’t even bring myself to google their names to see if these bands really existed!
And it seemed like the author wanted to throw in many obscure words to challenge her readers??? I am always up for a challenge so this didn’t overly bother me.
But overall, I did enjoy the story and would give it 3,5 stars.
If you like stories about college reunions with some fairly interesting characters give this older book a try.
Profile Image for Archana.
95 reviews4 followers
August 10, 2021
A highly readable tale of four friends 20 years after graduating from Harvard. This reminded me of Meg Wolitzer's The Interestings, which I also loved. The author could have distinguished the voices of the main characters a bit more but overall, I couldn't put it down.
Profile Image for Ruth Jones.
184 reviews44 followers
November 1, 2024
What a gorgeous book! made me laugh and cry. Will probably read again sometime in the future.
Profile Image for Eve.
398 reviews87 followers
July 26, 2016

The Red Book by Deborah Copaken Kogan refers to an actual red book published and distributed by Harvard to its alumni, where everyone’s whereabouts, occupation, and marital status are listed, as well as essays about what they’ve been up to in the past five years. There’s a quaint formality to this tradition, especially in the age of Facebook and the ability of most people to be “Googlable,” but it also forces each alum to regularly take stock of his/her life and be held accountable to themselves, their entire class, and the Ivy League institution from which they graduated. If you graduated from Harvard – you should be discovering the cure for cancer or else a titan of industry or basically lead a perfect, successful life, right?

The lives of characters in The Red Book are anything but. Kogan first presents characters’ red book entries, which range from glossy, enviable bios to the funny to heartbreaking confessionals. These entries are then contrasted with the four main characters’ real lives. During the course of their 20th reunion weekend, however, even what they perceive to be real is turned upside down as they uncover shocking secrets about themselves and each other.

The tumult of relationships drive The Red Book. Parent-child, husbands and wives, friendships, old loves all become exposed in one wild, drama-filled weekend, which shatters any illusions that being a Harvard graduate ensures a perfect life.

The Red Book, like its namesake, is bursting with irresistibly honest glimpses into ordinary and not-so-ordinary lives.

“Jane takes it all in, the part she can see, the part she imagines, and finds it mind-bending, overwhelming. What does it mean, all these tiny actions, these hidden secrets, these fragile humans with their hardships and friendships ... that survive the slog-sprint through time? Don’t you all realize? She feels like shouting. We all end up dust.”

Reading this book reminded me of a recent high school reunion (which I couldn’t attend because I had already bought plane tickets to visit my brother and his newborn that same weekend). I sent in a brief written bio encompassing what I’d been up to in the past 10 years – in 2-3 sentences. A ridiculous task that cannot possibly convey the depth and breadth of a life, yet I sent it in and read everyone else’s bios in the copy I had been given. What sort of secrets – heartbreaks, dashed dreams, failures, doubts – did their upbeat paragraphs hide?

I especially loved reading this book for a silly reason – one of the characters was from the obscure California town in which I grew up. What a delightful surprise to see it mentioned in an actual book!
Profile Image for Douglas.
681 reviews30 followers
May 17, 2013
I like this book but didn't like any of the characters. I really like the author, but have many differences of opinion with her.

I'm glad I read Ms Kogan's previous non fiction book first. She therein revealed her fascination with the Harvard Alumni "Red Book" and her desire to create a "Big Chill" for her generation. She successfully does this.

The author is a fascinating, worldly woman. Not a trust fund child, a working person. A former war photographer in Afghanistan, and now a Vespa riding, freelance writer Mom in New York City. She comes across a very interesting, dynamic, well rounded good woman.

I know my reviews ramble, but I like to just throw down my thoughts.

Book aptly mixes recent American events and social movements to present Franzen like snapshot of modern families.

Keeping in mind I finished the book rather quickly, which is a compliment, I find myself more haunted by what I didn't like about the characters.

First, I lost track of several of the male characters, they blended together and I didn't have the desire to go back in the book and match them to the correct wife.

But I'm more overwhelmed by the self absorbed angst, the inability of any of them to do actual work (except, honorably, child rearing).

I also found Ms Kogan a little heavy handed with her political positions. At least she didn't fall into the obligatory Bush bashing, but she definitely wants other people to pay for her child care and health care so she can go follow her dreams. And, of course, life must stand still until all gays are married.


I made the happy mistake of reading a comedic tome about modern white people just before writing this review. I was devastated with laughter as I saw our Harvard educated characters had the same numerous, predictable traits that were being made fun of.


Reverence for non profits.
Avoidance of real work - prefer the arts.
Worshiping all things French.
Love of socialized childcare and Medicine.
Pride in having gay friends.
Even in middle age, must follow their dreams.

The list goes on and on and is funnier than my summary. (see upcoming goodreads review). Iwas disgusted with these people that have so much and are so vapid. But maybe that was the author's point.
Profile Image for Monica.
626 reviews1 follower
August 18, 2013
I loved Shutterbabe, the author's memoir of her time as a photojournalist, so I was looking forward to this book. Unfortunately, The Red Book was fairly awful. First of all, all the characters are fairly privileged, which made them rather unsympathetic. I mean, I get that these are graduates of Harvard, and I've read and enjoyed books about people with wealth before, but this one was over the top. I mean, oh no! One of the character's houses is underwater! Maybe they'll have to sell the huge, fully renovated brownstone and buy something cheaper! But what about her child's private tuition?! And oh no! One of them might have to sell her vacation house! Oh, the poor thing! Look how the economic crash affects us all! And Addison "couldn't afford" a new Prius (although she's never worked a day in her life and has a trust fund and lives in New York), so she buys at 1963 VW Microbus? Really? Oh wait, she's the "wild one" because she used to do drugs.

Further, it seems like Copaken Kogan wanted to make the book as diverse as she could (um, except for income, because you know, why bother?) so one of the main characters is Asian, one's mixed race African-American, one's a white WASP, and one's a lesbian? Now I can't remember. Anyway, it just seemed like she was trying to be as pc as possible and cover all her bases, which came across as unrealistic.

Also, it seems like the answer to everyone's problems is to have children. I understood from Shutterbabe that the author is very maternal, and satisfied that she gave up her dangerous job to raise a family. But it seems like she's still trying to prove to herself and us that this is a valid choice.

I dunno. No, I do know. The book was ok in a soap opera way, and not unenjoyable, but I found myself a bit bowled over at being expected to sympathize with overly wealthy, ridiculous people.
Profile Image for Tanya Sen.
62 reviews16 followers
April 12, 2014
Every five years, the Harvard alumni office asks the graduates of a particular class to fill out an entry about what they've been up to for the last few years. These entries make up the "Red Book", which is circulated to all members of that class.

This novel is set at the 20th year reunion weekend of four women who were roommates at Harvard. It is interspersed with fictionalised "Red Book" entries, which take you through the lives and loves of the Class of 1989, as they make the journey from college through to middle age and reflect on where they are vs. where they thought they would be vs. where they now want to be.

In short, a very interesting premise.

The actual execution of the idea, though, is rather average. Midway through the book, the turns in the tale start to become highly predictable. Not, unfortunately, because they are plausible (they are not)...but because by then you've figured out the general rhythm of things and collapsed squarely into the realm of cliche. It all comes to a crux when one of the key characters goes off on an interminable jog, and it is with increasing anguish and impatience that one has to read the pages and pages of his thoughts that follow, for it is painfully obvious what is about to happen next...

Also, the author has a penchant for extremely long sentences that require some decoding (and are sometimes crammed with a bizarre level of detail that is unnecessary to the plot).

....Having said all this, the story is still interesting enough that it kept me reading all the way till the end. A nice and colourful portfolio of characters, and it is quite fun to shadow them for one weekend in their lives. All in all, it's an ok book. A qualified "like".
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