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Live, Laugh, Lesbian: Navigating Life as a Lesbian in the 21st Century
"Sometimes, it's easy to feel like the only lesbian in the world - let alone in the village. But wherever you are with your sexuality, you've just picked up a book with the word 'lesbian' in the title and I know baby you would be so proud."
From strap-ons and Lesbian Bed Death to dealing with homophobic microaggressions in the workplace and finding your second family, Helen Scott, lesbian big sister and lipstick femme in chief is here to hold your hand as you travel your own unique path to Gay Town.
Half memoir, half guide, and 100% big lesbian hug, plunge with Helen into the highs and lows of navigating lesbian life in the modern world and emerge with all the lesbian life hacks you'll need to get out there and live the life of your dreams.
Candid, wise, bold and hilarious - it's time to reclaim the L in LGBTQ+
From strap-ons and Lesbian Bed Death to dealing with homophobic microaggressions in the workplace and finding your second family, Helen Scott, lesbian big sister and lipstick femme in chief is here to hold your hand as you travel your own unique path to Gay Town.
Half memoir, half guide, and 100% big lesbian hug, plunge with Helen into the highs and lows of navigating lesbian life in the modern world and emerge with all the lesbian life hacks you'll need to get out there and live the life of your dreams.
Candid, wise, bold and hilarious - it's time to reclaim the L in LGBTQ+
224 pages, Paperback
Published October 19, 2023
13 people are currently reading
133 people want to read
About the author
Helen Scott
50 books120 followersLibrarian note:
There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.
This profile may contain books from multiple authors of this name.
See also: Romance author Helen Scott
There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name.
This profile may contain books from multiple authors of this name.
See also: Romance author Helen Scott
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 41 reviews
March 23, 2024
Now I have to confess that as well as Flower, I was also kissing boys. I know, how could I? But let me explain. My boy crushes were on androgynous, feminine-energy boys, which totally makes sense as that’s my type now, but in women. My point is, because of those feelings, those fancies and those experiences with boys, I didn’t realize that I was a lesbian. I now realize that I didn’t know I was a lesbian because I didn’t really know what a lesbian was. I had boyfriends, one of whom I stalked around my secondary school for four months every lunchtime, following him to the art department and feigning a love of anime so that he would notice me. He was very Harry Styles energy in my defence! But even up until the age of seventeen I had boyfriends, fancied Nick from Backstreet Boys and just didn’t know that I was, in fact, gayer than a Fletcher concert.
here's a question: why are bisexual women so obsessed with co-opting the lesbian label. why are they under the impression that everyone in the world is also bisexual like them and "lesbian" simply means "bisexual with a preference for women". lesbians did not spend their adolescence having crushes on "androgynous soft boys", stanning boybands and being "boymad". they spent their adolescence either feeling like freaks or being told they were freaks for not feeling this way.
If we were to look at labels in black and white, I'm not a lesbian. I'm pansexual. Essentially, pansexual means that your attraction to someone isn’t determined by their gender, but by who they are as a person. Now I can fancy pretty much anyone other than straight men (sorry guys, it’s you, not me!). I’m attracted to those whose sexuality falls on the queer spectrum in some way, but in terms of gender, I’ve been known to dabble! And so yes, technically, pansexual would best describe my sexuality. However, I don’t believe that anything is truly black and white when it comes to sexuality or gender, and I identify as a lesbian, through and through. Humans all have their variations, and that’s true of any group or community too. It’s what makes life so interesting, right? So if I’m a lesbian who has pansexual qualities, what does that then make me?"
it makes you NOT A LESBIAN.
what a slap in the face to pick up a book that says "lesbian" on the cover only to be reminded in less than five pages that the word "lesbian" has been appropriated by everyone and their uncle and that none of these people have yanked their heads out of their assholes for long enough to consider why this obnoxious behaviour might harm homosexual women who are already a numerical minority and are now left without any language to describe their specific experiences.
really, the audacity to blurb this as "you might feel like the only lesbian in the world" and then go on to do the exact thing that contributes to the extreme alienation that lesbians feel for their homosexuality.
July 25, 2024
Re-read: nooooo.
For a book supposedly all about lesbians, this has barely any featured in it. The author has interview snippets from queer people but the majority of them aren’t lesbians. That’s literally why I bought this book. No shade to them, but I don’t want to read about the bisexual experience. If I did, I’d have bought a bisexual book.
Helen Scott’s writing is painfully millennial and the advice given is average, I was expecting something a bit more meaningful rather than “go out, get drunk, have a proper gay experience”. Not all of us is that type of person but thanks for generalising I guess.
It’s also incredibly whiplash inducing. One minute it’s “label yourself, you’re a bad lesbian if you don’t use the word lesbian” but also “omg labels aren’t for all of us”. And to top it off, Helen literally says in the first chapter that she’s actually pansexual but just likes the lesbian label better 👁️👄👁️ like no Helen babes, we didn’t all grow up with a crush on a guy from a boy band, we’re lesbians!!! We had crushes on women in girl bands instead!!! I want to read about a similar experience to my own with a hopeful outcome, not this performative mess.
If your thing is stereotypes and a very binaristic view of lesbians and people that present as masculine or feminine, then I imagine you’d love this book. Also, I hated how Helen basically said the only queer community online is TikTok. I’m not even gonna open that door 🤦🏼♀️
For a book that’s supposed to be a safe space for lesbians it does a shocking poor job at that, and instead borders on performative lesbianism. Ngl I’m disappointed I wasted my money on this when I could have bought something else from Gays The Word. Sigh.
For a book supposedly all about lesbians, this has barely any featured in it. The author has interview snippets from queer people but the majority of them aren’t lesbians. That’s literally why I bought this book. No shade to them, but I don’t want to read about the bisexual experience. If I did, I’d have bought a bisexual book.
Helen Scott’s writing is painfully millennial and the advice given is average, I was expecting something a bit more meaningful rather than “go out, get drunk, have a proper gay experience”. Not all of us is that type of person but thanks for generalising I guess.
It’s also incredibly whiplash inducing. One minute it’s “label yourself, you’re a bad lesbian if you don’t use the word lesbian” but also “omg labels aren’t for all of us”. And to top it off, Helen literally says in the first chapter that she’s actually pansexual but just likes the lesbian label better 👁️👄👁️ like no Helen babes, we didn’t all grow up with a crush on a guy from a boy band, we’re lesbians!!! We had crushes on women in girl bands instead!!! I want to read about a similar experience to my own with a hopeful outcome, not this performative mess.
If your thing is stereotypes and a very binaristic view of lesbians and people that present as masculine or feminine, then I imagine you’d love this book. Also, I hated how Helen basically said the only queer community online is TikTok. I’m not even gonna open that door 🤦🏼♀️
For a book that’s supposed to be a safe space for lesbians it does a shocking poor job at that, and instead borders on performative lesbianism. Ngl I’m disappointed I wasted my money on this when I could have bought something else from Gays The Word. Sigh.
August 22, 2023
love the title and the cover. i think the concept is very interesting.
I read up until the 40% mark, and then it was skimmed to get the gist and see if any other chapters peaked my interest.
could be interesting for teens, but overall i found it too superficial (the tone, condescending at times, didn't help), both on the memoir end and the guide end. i have read essays and thoughts from many others that are deeper and more structured on all of these issues before. also a lot of it is just life experience*. hence, why i think this might be better for teens.
*on that note, much of what i read in the last chapter i disagreed with, so i just think me and the author have deeply different ways to live and be in the world. (diversity win!)
disclaimer: book obtained via Netgalley. This review is frelly given and reflects my true thoughts.
ps. tiktok didn't invent queer online community. the queer nerds have been online since the moment we could.
I read up until the 40% mark, and then it was skimmed to get the gist and see if any other chapters peaked my interest.
could be interesting for teens, but overall i found it too superficial (the tone, condescending at times, didn't help), both on the memoir end and the guide end. i have read essays and thoughts from many others that are deeper and more structured on all of these issues before. also a lot of it is just life experience*. hence, why i think this might be better for teens.
*on that note, much of what i read in the last chapter i disagreed with, so i just think me and the author have deeply different ways to live and be in the world. (diversity win!)
disclaimer: book obtained via Netgalley. This review is frelly given and reflects my true thoughts.
ps. tiktok didn't invent queer online community. the queer nerds have been online since the moment we could.
June 23, 2023
Part memoir, part guide, part conversation and all queer joy — Live, Laugh, Lesbian is a brilliantly warm and friendly journey into the queer experience, not only from the author but from plenty of other lesbian, queer, bisexual and pansexual contributors who bring a unique viewpoint and voice and also show a beautiful diverse, intersectional scope of the queer spectrum and welcomes in queer people and allies of any kind to come feel the love.
The book is very conversational, talking to the reader in a fun, friendly way — at times I rolled my eyes as the use of “famalam” but as a previous patron of Colours and Chicagos I’m not in a position to judge. It’s full of anecdotes and observations that were witty and relatable as well as talking is through the more difficult side of queerness like dealing with workplace discrimination, religious trauma and coming out to family members. There was a little rambling at times but generally it’s laid out in clear sections and very easy to read, and full of such warmth and love that it really did feel like talking to a friend, especially when she discussed her own experiences coming out and trying to navigate a world where you only know stereotypes and insults. It's also important to remember this is about personal experience, and Helen is not speaking for all sapphic women - she will say things that might not represent you or that you can't relate to and that's fine.
She breaks down myths and stereotypes, common terms and misunderstandings about sapphic women without being condescending or too technical, discusses how gender and outdated gender roles affect us as women and acknowledges the other sapphic sexualities and how they might relate to these shared experiences and truths.
Whether you’re just looking for a book to share an experience or to try and figure something out, this was delightful.
Note; *now I’ve seen some criticism of this book saying the author isn’t a lesbian as they say maybe pansexual fits too. But the author still primarily identifies as a lesbian— and regardless of that fact it’s not my place to pass judgment on how an author identifies. Yes Helen briefly discusses dating men as a teenager and being attracted to non-binary people but that’s part of discovering your sexuality - The entire rest of the book does in fact discuss lesbian culture and sapphic culture throughout — and let’s remember that sexuality is a fluid and personal thing, we may have many names or qualities throughout our lives and that’s a beautiful thing.
The book is very conversational, talking to the reader in a fun, friendly way — at times I rolled my eyes as the use of “famalam” but as a previous patron of Colours and Chicagos I’m not in a position to judge. It’s full of anecdotes and observations that were witty and relatable as well as talking is through the more difficult side of queerness like dealing with workplace discrimination, religious trauma and coming out to family members. There was a little rambling at times but generally it’s laid out in clear sections and very easy to read, and full of such warmth and love that it really did feel like talking to a friend, especially when she discussed her own experiences coming out and trying to navigate a world where you only know stereotypes and insults. It's also important to remember this is about personal experience, and Helen is not speaking for all sapphic women - she will say things that might not represent you or that you can't relate to and that's fine.
She breaks down myths and stereotypes, common terms and misunderstandings about sapphic women without being condescending or too technical, discusses how gender and outdated gender roles affect us as women and acknowledges the other sapphic sexualities and how they might relate to these shared experiences and truths.
Whether you’re just looking for a book to share an experience or to try and figure something out, this was delightful.
Note; *now I’ve seen some criticism of this book saying the author isn’t a lesbian as they say maybe pansexual fits too. But the author still primarily identifies as a lesbian— and regardless of that fact it’s not my place to pass judgment on how an author identifies. Yes Helen briefly discusses dating men as a teenager and being attracted to non-binary people but that’s part of discovering your sexuality - The entire rest of the book does in fact discuss lesbian culture and sapphic culture throughout — and let’s remember that sexuality is a fluid and personal thing, we may have many names or qualities throughout our lives and that’s a beautiful thing.
July 11, 2023
I think this book is important. As a lesbian, I really struggled to find advice for older women in the community. However, this book fails on nearly every front. My two main issues are below.
The authorial voice - Every page I turned was a nightmare, each with worse outdated specific millennial language than the last. I never want to hear my friend referred to as "bezza". The author's style was too conversational and often felt like I was overhearing a conversation I wasn't supposed to rather than having the stories told to me.
Storytelling -The stories felt condensed and never given the amount of time for them as humorous or impactful as I think they were intended. Combined with the authorial voice, the reading experience was just unpleasant.
I was clearly not the intended audience for this book. The information presented isn't really new to lesbians who have been in the scene for a while. Maybe it would be better in the hands of a younger lesbian. But with a frank discussion of sex it's hard to see this for teenagers, but the writing style lends itself to a younger audience.
The authorial voice - Every page I turned was a nightmare, each with worse outdated specific millennial language than the last. I never want to hear my friend referred to as "bezza". The author's style was too conversational and often felt like I was overhearing a conversation I wasn't supposed to rather than having the stories told to me.
Storytelling -The stories felt condensed and never given the amount of time for them as humorous or impactful as I think they were intended. Combined with the authorial voice, the reading experience was just unpleasant.
I was clearly not the intended audience for this book. The information presented isn't really new to lesbians who have been in the scene for a while. Maybe it would be better in the hands of a younger lesbian. But with a frank discussion of sex it's hard to see this for teenagers, but the writing style lends itself to a younger audience.
November 30, 2023
This book was honestly disappointing. I love that the term lesbian was used frequently and openly but other than that, nothing in this book was particularly groundbreaking. I suppose if you are a young lesbian/questioning person this could potentially be helpful, however the information it contains is very basic and also very specific to the UK. Although I was not the target audience for this book I can appreciate that it may be much more valuable to someone else, which is why I’ve bumped my rating from 2 to 3 stars.
December 8, 2023
Not bad for a nonfiction book, I enjoyed some chapters more than others but overall did find it a valuable read.
August 16, 2023
i love the title of this book! the cover is so colorful (and representative of the l-flag) and drew me in instantly. i really enjoyed some of the takes in some of the interviews, too. however, i wish this book was labeled more as “a memoir filled with anecdotal secondary interviews” or something, to me, that feels more honest. i didn’t feel like this was only half-memoir, i couldn’t escape reading about the author’s life on almost all the pages (i have to be honest, i dnfed at the halfway point). i kept searching for the tips and tricks i was promised, but felt instead i was being patronized and spoken down to (i love my sweatpants and i didn’t know i needed a pantsuit to be a good lesbian?). i was uncomfortable with the writing of this book, leaning into so much british slang that i felt like i didn’t know what was happening sometimes. in some passages, the author spoke about disliking labels, but goes on to list pages and pages of labels. i felt an inconsistency. i would love to see this re-branded as a “british guide to the baby gay: a series of stories and interviews”.
Read
January 3, 2025I simply could not finish or read past a third of this book. Maybe the self-help was further in but it felt more like I was reading about the author and her feelings etc… Some parts often felt a bit patronising I guess? I really don’t know how to feel about this book other than I will not continue reading it… Some parts were trying too hard to be funny and maybe were focused more towards younger people? The writing of “irl” instead of in real life really drove me crazy and I’m not sure why. Some books aren’t for everyone and this wasn’t for me, and that’s okay! I hope the next person who reads this book loves it and if it helps someone then great. I liked the cover though :)
(Special thanks to Jessica Kingsley Publishers for the arc)
(Special thanks to Jessica Kingsley Publishers for the arc)
June 16, 2024
The author was well intentioned but this book rubbed me the wrong way. The tone felt pretty cringe ("irl", "babes", "humans" "you're probably thinking..."). The advice was pretty basic, and a huge proportion of the people interviewed weren't lesbians (which feels like a pretty essential prerequisite to be included in a book about lesbianism).
I felt myself rolling my eyes and skimming ahead to get through it quickly. It does have a relatively good chapter on sex (comparatively) but there's really nothing else that saves this book.
Side frustration- she confused Amy Schumer with Rebel Wilson which made my soul die a little.
I felt myself rolling my eyes and skimming ahead to get through it quickly. It does have a relatively good chapter on sex (comparatively) but there's really nothing else that saves this book.
Side frustration- she confused Amy Schumer with Rebel Wilson which made my soul die a little.
October 12, 2024
as much as i enjoyed reading the passages from a range of people in the lgbtqia+ community, i was a little disappointed as i did pick this book up expecting it to be all about lesbians (it's literally in the title?)
but aside from that, this was so painfully millennial and i really did struggle to get through it.. add to that the fact that about halfway through, the author literally writes that she "can fancy pretty much anyone other than straight men" and that "pansexual would best describe [her] sexuality"...
it's a no from me!
but aside from that, this was so painfully millennial and i really did struggle to get through it.. add to that the fact that about halfway through, the author literally writes that she "can fancy pretty much anyone other than straight men" and that "pansexual would best describe [her] sexuality"...
it's a no from me!
August 25, 2025
This book was very ok. Some of the takes, especially around gender, were a bit dated even though the book is pretty new and it felt like it couldn't decide whether labels mattered or not. I also think I was very much not the target demographic, which I would imagine to be newly out lesbians or other baby gays, rather than someone living happily with their partner for years already. It had overall positive vibes and was welcoming enough.
December 22, 2024
A good queer guide to life! Very useful if you're questioning your identity and realise that you might have been a Lesbian all along!
May 23, 2024
I am so sorry but…3 stars was being generous…
July 18, 2024
another jessica kingsley. some of these land, some of them don’t. unfortunately, this one didn’t, really.
my notes while reading:
- using quotes from people that contain the phrase “both genders”… say it with me: fake ally
- giving incorrect sexuality definitions, then saying “educated queers are the best queers”?? cute so be one then. follow your own advice.
- bad spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc
- “famalam” ??? what YEAR are we in
- trans is not a gender, and all sexualities include trans people.
- sapiosexual is such a random inclusion
- you can be a lesbian and fancy non-binary people
- i appreciate the “not all women have vulvas / not all vulva-owners are women” disclaimer
- i love the content on sex with no focus on orgasm >>>
- using lactation as a gendered example of parenting… do we remember what gender means babe
- i hate the fact everything is converted to american language as well, americans never do that for us 💀
my notes while reading:
- using quotes from people that contain the phrase “both genders”… say it with me: fake ally
- giving incorrect sexuality definitions, then saying “educated queers are the best queers”?? cute so be one then. follow your own advice.
- bad spelling, grammar, punctuation, etc
- “famalam” ??? what YEAR are we in
- trans is not a gender, and all sexualities include trans people.
- sapiosexual is such a random inclusion
- you can be a lesbian and fancy non-binary people
- i appreciate the “not all women have vulvas / not all vulva-owners are women” disclaimer
- i love the content on sex with no focus on orgasm >>>
- using lactation as a gendered example of parenting… do we remember what gender means babe
- i hate the fact everything is converted to american language as well, americans never do that for us 💀
February 3, 2024
Whilst it wasn't what I expected, this book did make me feel more self-love and it was good to hear about other people's stories and experiences.
July 2, 2024
Very funny title, funky cover, I was hideously tempted to read it...
However, not for me! I couldn't finish it. It's far too beginner, too general and doesn't get into other complexities that I struggle with as a lesbian in this modern day. Even though I'm also in the UK! This book hasn't certainly maximised my living, laughing, and lesbeing in the way I wanted to. I do not think it appeals to me as a Gen Z either, with the language style being too Millenial, but that's just me being picky.
It's a decent attempt, I admire the author's effort, but it is suggestive of the difficulty that is to: compress the lesbian experience!!! This book will just seem like a time capsule in a decade or two. The world changes so much, even in the UK in the good ol' 2020s, there's new queer organisations popping up (SO many hiking groups, dyke march, queer foraging?!), enabling more community-building, interaction, and overall change. Furthering that, there is a constant influx of new queer events around the country, new dating apps, online dating mannerisms (ghosting is obviously far more frequent as we know), developments in media (2024 HAS to be the year of lesbian pop because WTF) putting queerness in the mainstream, and so on. Honestly though, cheers to the flourishing of many, many, many fascinating queer lifeways in the UK as this decade goes on!
Aside from that, what this book suggests as well, referencing the top review for this book, is discourse regarding bisexuals in lesbian spaces. 2020s queer discourse at its finest; and how tense, stress-inducing! Hope we can sort this out, gays.
Also, this book should lean more into multiple intersectionalities, i.e being neurodivergent, for I do not relate to many of the advice/social rules give in this book, it is not congruent with my lesbian experience. I would kill to read way more stories, though! Collect 'em all!
I do hope however, that any baby lesbian gives this book a try, perhaps they'll get more out of it.
However, not for me! I couldn't finish it. It's far too beginner, too general and doesn't get into other complexities that I struggle with as a lesbian in this modern day. Even though I'm also in the UK! This book hasn't certainly maximised my living, laughing, and lesbeing in the way I wanted to. I do not think it appeals to me as a Gen Z either, with the language style being too Millenial, but that's just me being picky.
It's a decent attempt, I admire the author's effort, but it is suggestive of the difficulty that is to: compress the lesbian experience!!! This book will just seem like a time capsule in a decade or two. The world changes so much, even in the UK in the good ol' 2020s, there's new queer organisations popping up (SO many hiking groups, dyke march, queer foraging?!), enabling more community-building, interaction, and overall change. Furthering that, there is a constant influx of new queer events around the country, new dating apps, online dating mannerisms (ghosting is obviously far more frequent as we know), developments in media (2024 HAS to be the year of lesbian pop because WTF) putting queerness in the mainstream, and so on. Honestly though, cheers to the flourishing of many, many, many fascinating queer lifeways in the UK as this decade goes on!
Aside from that, what this book suggests as well, referencing the top review for this book, is discourse regarding bisexuals in lesbian spaces. 2020s queer discourse at its finest; and how tense, stress-inducing! Hope we can sort this out, gays.
Also, this book should lean more into multiple intersectionalities, i.e being neurodivergent, for I do not relate to many of the advice/social rules give in this book, it is not congruent with my lesbian experience. I would kill to read way more stories, though! Collect 'em all!
I do hope however, that any baby lesbian gives this book a try, perhaps they'll get more out of it.
December 8, 2024
If I ever have to read the words "vagina tingles," "famalam," or "woo woo" again, it will be far too soon.
This was less an examination of lesbian life in the 21st century and more of a memoir/self help book type deal. It wasn't bad - I actually quite enjoyed the first half of it - but I found a lot of the second half to be unnecessary and drag quite a bit. In particular, the chapter on being a lesbian in the workplace was unnecessary (and kind of ableist - no, Helen, not all of us do work! In fact, some of us are unable to for reasons outside our control!)
One thing that irked me was that, for all this book claimed to be for "all lesbians," there was little mention of transgender lesbians, and where it did talk about gender nonconformity it was always in the vein of "masc" lesbians. (Back in my day, we just called those butch, but I digress.) Also, there were many, many discussions of how some lesbians struggle with coming out - but not a single one of the guest writers was from a family that wasn't accepting of their sexuality. In fact, overall, there wasn't much discussion of what one could do when their family wasn't accepting. Helen Scott painted queer life with this broad brush of "once you come out everything will be okay because you are being True To Yourself and that's the most important thing!" and that simply isn't true.
Still. It wasn't a bad book.
This was less an examination of lesbian life in the 21st century and more of a memoir/self help book type deal. It wasn't bad - I actually quite enjoyed the first half of it - but I found a lot of the second half to be unnecessary and drag quite a bit. In particular, the chapter on being a lesbian in the workplace was unnecessary (and kind of ableist - no, Helen, not all of us do work! In fact, some of us are unable to for reasons outside our control!)
One thing that irked me was that, for all this book claimed to be for "all lesbians," there was little mention of transgender lesbians, and where it did talk about gender nonconformity it was always in the vein of "masc" lesbians. (Back in my day, we just called those butch, but I digress.) Also, there were many, many discussions of how some lesbians struggle with coming out - but not a single one of the guest writers was from a family that wasn't accepting of their sexuality. In fact, overall, there wasn't much discussion of what one could do when their family wasn't accepting. Helen Scott painted queer life with this broad brush of "once you come out everything will be okay because you are being True To Yourself and that's the most important thing!" and that simply isn't true.
Still. It wasn't a bad book.
February 3, 2025
What did she want to say with this book? Because I'm confused.
She babbled so much that anything good was drowned out in repetition and information that felt useless. I can't tell what she wanted to say with this book. What was her purpose for writing it? It's a lot of praising lesbians, but at the same time, very few anecdotes from lesbians other than herself.
Maybe she should have named the book Live, laugh, queer, as the publishers suggested; Because most guest anecdotes weren't from people identifying as lesbians, but I'll give it to them that they at least talked about loving women. There are also so many instances where she contradicts herself, is overly positive, and perhaps is not very inclusive, especially when describing what lesbians should do (go out and drink and party for example).
Yeah, I'm just confused and didn't get anything useful or even entertaining out of this one, unfortunately.
She babbled so much that anything good was drowned out in repetition and information that felt useless. I can't tell what she wanted to say with this book. What was her purpose for writing it? It's a lot of praising lesbians, but at the same time, very few anecdotes from lesbians other than herself.
Maybe she should have named the book Live, laugh, queer, as the publishers suggested; Because most guest anecdotes weren't from people identifying as lesbians, but I'll give it to them that they at least talked about loving women. There are also so many instances where she contradicts herself, is overly positive, and perhaps is not very inclusive, especially when describing what lesbians should do (go out and drink and party for example).
Yeah, I'm just confused and didn't get anything useful or even entertaining out of this one, unfortunately.
January 8, 2025
I loved the enthusiasm of this book however I was hoping for more resources or information throughout on some of the stigma and issues faced and how to overcome, whether with family, within the workplace, in society, or even within yourself with internalised homophobia.
The pipeline of going from newly out to radical self-acceptance can be windy for some and this book initially looked promising for gaining further insights about myself and our community.
I did enjoy the interviews included, both for the reading style of a podcast and also for the varying views.
Will be searching for more books in the non-fiction lesbian genre to further educate myself.
The pipeline of going from newly out to radical self-acceptance can be windy for some and this book initially looked promising for gaining further insights about myself and our community.
I did enjoy the interviews included, both for the reading style of a podcast and also for the varying views.
Will be searching for more books in the non-fiction lesbian genre to further educate myself.
July 5, 2023
Live, Laugh, Lesbian is a hilarious and truthful lesson learning tool for all things regarding lesbianism.
From tips on coming out, being a part of and having a queer family, to dating advice and the ridiculousness of phrases such as 'you don't look like a lesbian', Helen Scott has perfected a how-to guide for lesbians, old and new, out or in the closet.
It was a joy to read!
Thank you to Helen Scott, NetGalley and the publishers for allowing me the opportunity to read this ahead of publication in return for an honest review.
3/5 stars! 🌟
From tips on coming out, being a part of and having a queer family, to dating advice and the ridiculousness of phrases such as 'you don't look like a lesbian', Helen Scott has perfected a how-to guide for lesbians, old and new, out or in the closet.
It was a joy to read!
Thank you to Helen Scott, NetGalley and the publishers for allowing me the opportunity to read this ahead of publication in return for an honest review.
3/5 stars! 🌟
September 3, 2023
Described as part memoir, part guide, I would say its more memoir than guide, except the focus of it being a guide detracts from the memoir too. It reads like a collection of social media posts, especially the use of language, which I found irritating, I suspect I am too old to be the target audience, I certainly felt old reading it. DNF
With thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
With thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for an ARC in exchange for an honest review.
August 8, 2024
I thought this book was brilliant. Really assists in navigating homosexuality in the 21st century and puts the power, meaning, and value back in the 'L' of the LGBTQ+ acronym.
I'd give it a read if you identify this way. Even if you don't, it's a great educational tool for understanding lesbianism and all the factors that play into it.
It was a good read and much enjoyed. I do enjoy a good pride-related book.
I'd give it a read if you identify this way. Even if you don't, it's a great educational tool for understanding lesbianism and all the factors that play into it.
It was a good read and much enjoyed. I do enjoy a good pride-related book.
August 29, 2023
Honestly, as someone who is dyslexic the way this book was available on the netgalley app was very difficult for me.
I had really wanted to like this book but I just could not get into it.
Some memoir parts were great and others were hard for me to read. Also some of the vocabulary was difficult.
That being said it may still end up on my shelves because the cover was everything
I had really wanted to like this book but I just could not get into it.
Some memoir parts were great and others were hard for me to read. Also some of the vocabulary was difficult.
That being said it may still end up on my shelves because the cover was everything
December 14, 2024
The title was quite fun but this was not what I expected. I thought this would be a collection of fun stories from a lesbian perspective but turned out it was more of a "starter guide" for queer people. Nothing wrong with that but I felt the tone was quite patronizing. I am clearly not the intended audience but did not learn anything new either.
July 2, 2025
I think I just wasn't the audience for this book. It contains good advice, but it is very basic and general, about how scary but freeing it is to come out, about how not all lesbians look the same, about how sleeping enough, drinking water and going to therapy can help you feel better etc. It's not bad advice, but I also did not learn anything new.
December 3, 2025
⭐️⭐️⭐️🌗 (3.5)
I found this book educational. At the same time I have to admit that this is the first of its kind that I have read..
My goal is to let this be the first of many.
Can't be a true ally without educating myself properly..
So if you read this and have any recommendations...
Please do me the honors of sharing them with me💜
I found this book educational. At the same time I have to admit that this is the first of its kind that I have read..
My goal is to let this be the first of many.
Can't be a true ally without educating myself properly..
So if you read this and have any recommendations...
Please do me the honors of sharing them with me💜
June 17, 2023
I expected more about this book.
It's called Live, Laugh, Lesbian but there is not enough Lesbianism.
I would have loved it if the author would have spent more time in actually describing the life as a lesbian.
It was good, just good.
It's called Live, Laugh, Lesbian but there is not enough Lesbianism.
I would have loved it if the author would have spent more time in actually describing the life as a lesbian.
It was good, just good.
January 25, 2025
My plan was to read more queer material this year. Not a great start, I listened to this while during chores at home, if I missed a bit while going outside to hang the washing I didn't bother rewinding the missed it.
August 7, 2025
Freaking HATED this. Had to DNF - and I usually don’t. Maybe if you’re a baby gay…maybe if you’re 35…maybe. I wanted deep, intelligent but funny dives into being a lesbian in the world. I got bullshit talks about shoes from a bisexual. Nope.
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