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Raising Abel
KIRKUS REVIEWS
A woman of remarkable resourcefulness single-handedly raises a troubled child all the way to manhood in this intimate and inspiring blog-to-book memoir.
At 38, Carolyn Nash had a good job, no apparent struggles and few conscious regrets—save, perhaps, her weight and her childlessness. She remedies the latter by fostering and then adopting 3-year-old Abel, a victim of
unspeakable parental abuse, most of it sexual. The consequences are predictable and agonizing. Abel is charmingly innocent yet uncontrollably violent, and as he grows, so do his PTSD symptoms. He refuses to bathe,
he fails in school. Thrown toys become thrown punches, then smashed windshields. Psychiatrists are consulted, police called. Special education, home-schooling, hospitalizations, meds—all resources are tried and exhausted. Yet Nash remains indefatigable, wrestling with her son (literally) and with her inner demons and repressed memories, haltingly revealed in sessions with her therapist. Through the lens of Abel’s trauma, Nash peers into her own nightmares—she too feels deformed and unlovable—and learns their sick source. The book is structured almost entirely in short, dramatic episodes, a technique Nash uses skillfully... late in the story, when the troubled teen turns violently on Nash herself ... we get a
penetrating glimpse into Abel’s beating heart, where his triggers, his alienation and his lifelong struggle come into searing focus. Here Nash gives
us Abel in full, and we see with our own eyes how the measure of this young man is also the measure of the woman who raised him—with pure,
dogged, unrelenting, overwhelming, at times selfish, often desperate, boundless, evergreen love. This was her treatment and her cure. We know it
by its common term—mothering.
A sobering but uplifting tale of love that never gives up; dramatically told, ultimately rewarding.
A woman of remarkable resourcefulness single-handedly raises a troubled child all the way to manhood in this intimate and inspiring blog-to-book memoir.
At 38, Carolyn Nash had a good job, no apparent struggles and few conscious regrets—save, perhaps, her weight and her childlessness. She remedies the latter by fostering and then adopting 3-year-old Abel, a victim of
unspeakable parental abuse, most of it sexual. The consequences are predictable and agonizing. Abel is charmingly innocent yet uncontrollably violent, and as he grows, so do his PTSD symptoms. He refuses to bathe,
he fails in school. Thrown toys become thrown punches, then smashed windshields. Psychiatrists are consulted, police called. Special education, home-schooling, hospitalizations, meds—all resources are tried and exhausted. Yet Nash remains indefatigable, wrestling with her son (literally) and with her inner demons and repressed memories, haltingly revealed in sessions with her therapist. Through the lens of Abel’s trauma, Nash peers into her own nightmares—she too feels deformed and unlovable—and learns their sick source. The book is structured almost entirely in short, dramatic episodes, a technique Nash uses skillfully... late in the story, when the troubled teen turns violently on Nash herself ... we get a
penetrating glimpse into Abel’s beating heart, where his triggers, his alienation and his lifelong struggle come into searing focus. Here Nash gives
us Abel in full, and we see with our own eyes how the measure of this young man is also the measure of the woman who raised him—with pure,
dogged, unrelenting, overwhelming, at times selfish, often desperate, boundless, evergreen love. This was her treatment and her cure. We know it
by its common term—mothering.
A sobering but uplifting tale of love that never gives up; dramatically told, ultimately rewarding.
333 pages, Kindle Edition
First published November 4, 2011
21 people are currently reading
335 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 57 reviews
June 14, 2022
An interesting bio, taken from blog posts it looks like, about a woman who was starring at middle age alone and with nothing more than a good bank balance (sounds like heaven to me) and decides to adopt a child. The child she adopts was abused, neglected, and damaged by the drugs his parents took both before his birth and then forced on him after his birth - and that's just the tip of what they did to him.
There's a lot of insight in how child development disrupted by the above can permanently alter a person's psyche and continue to impact them long past the end of the abuse. It made me very grateful to not have had to go through any of that at any point in my life.
A very heavy topic, told in a way as if she was standing there telling it to you, which could be a bit jarring at times in focus but always honest.
There's a lot of insight in how child development disrupted by the above can permanently alter a person's psyche and continue to impact them long past the end of the abuse. It made me very grateful to not have had to go through any of that at any point in my life.
A very heavy topic, told in a way as if she was standing there telling it to you, which could be a bit jarring at times in focus but always honest.
April 21, 2012
This is by far one of the most moving, heart-breaking, and painful novels I've ever read. At the same time it is also very hopeful.
Carolyn Nash has provided a very raw look at her experience as a foster turned adoptive parent. Raising Abel is a well-written book. Chapters are short and concise. She doesn't add unnecessary detail or overload with more than needed background/descriptive information. That bares mentioning here because I think it would be easy for an author with this type of content to do so.
Nash hasn't sugar coated anything either. Readers see into her past as well as Abel's, and I'm not honestly sure how one could read this book and not get attached to them both (among other supporting roles). Abel and Carolyn are two of the most lovable people - courageous, loving, supportive, special.
I honestly think I'd put this book in the hands of anyone considering foster care or adoption. I think I'd put this book in the hands of ANY parent. I read passages with which I could relate and others I couldn't, but every single one was helpful and insightful.
Carolyn and Abel couldn't have been matched more perfectly - finding each other was nothing short of a miracle and a God-sent blessing.
During this book I experienced frustration, anger, heart break, insight, happiness, fear, tears, laughter, similarity, and above all hope.
Carolyn Nash has provided a very raw look at her experience as a foster turned adoptive parent. Raising Abel is a well-written book. Chapters are short and concise. She doesn't add unnecessary detail or overload with more than needed background/descriptive information. That bares mentioning here because I think it would be easy for an author with this type of content to do so.
Nash hasn't sugar coated anything either. Readers see into her past as well as Abel's, and I'm not honestly sure how one could read this book and not get attached to them both (among other supporting roles). Abel and Carolyn are two of the most lovable people - courageous, loving, supportive, special.
I honestly think I'd put this book in the hands of anyone considering foster care or adoption. I think I'd put this book in the hands of ANY parent. I read passages with which I could relate and others I couldn't, but every single one was helpful and insightful.
Carolyn and Abel couldn't have been matched more perfectly - finding each other was nothing short of a miracle and a God-sent blessing.
During this book I experienced frustration, anger, heart break, insight, happiness, fear, tears, laughter, similarity, and above all hope.
April 14, 2012
This is THE most moving book that I have ever read. As a schoolteacher I have taught students who had been abused. This book took me on a journey with two of the most remarkable people I have ever read about.
At the beginning of the story we are introduced to Carolyn Nash, a 38 year old single woman. Soon she brings Abel, a severely abused three year old, into her home and her heart. Carolyn allows the reader to be a part of her family with us witnessing happy and extremely sad moments in their life. As I read, I was devastated for Carolyn and Abel at their plots in life. I sobbed many times for these two, and I cheered Carolyn on as she came into herself during the story. I was trying to tell my Mom about this book today and was unable to talk about it without shedding tears.
If you only like to read books with roses and fairy tales then you should not read this book. I thought I was that type of reader, but this book proved me wrong.
Two of my favorite scenes :
Carolyn soothes Abel with singing to him, and she makes up a sweet song. "I love Abel, he's the best boy in the world. His mother loves him so much." As she sings he begins to cry. When she goes to comfort him he says, Mom, it was just so beautiful.
After some bad times with Abel, he writes her a letter. One line stuck with me. He wrote that Gods light is always shining in you even in the darkest times. How true a statement. One of my mother's favorite songs talks about angels being among us. I wonder if Carolyn Nash is not one -- sent here to do great things that the average person could not do. Carolyn, thanks for inviting us into your life on your journey.
At the beginning of the story we are introduced to Carolyn Nash, a 38 year old single woman. Soon she brings Abel, a severely abused three year old, into her home and her heart. Carolyn allows the reader to be a part of her family with us witnessing happy and extremely sad moments in their life. As I read, I was devastated for Carolyn and Abel at their plots in life. I sobbed many times for these two, and I cheered Carolyn on as she came into herself during the story. I was trying to tell my Mom about this book today and was unable to talk about it without shedding tears.
If you only like to read books with roses and fairy tales then you should not read this book. I thought I was that type of reader, but this book proved me wrong.
Two of my favorite scenes :
Carolyn soothes Abel with singing to him, and she makes up a sweet song. "I love Abel, he's the best boy in the world. His mother loves him so much." As she sings he begins to cry. When she goes to comfort him he says, Mom, it was just so beautiful.
After some bad times with Abel, he writes her a letter. One line stuck with me. He wrote that Gods light is always shining in you even in the darkest times. How true a statement. One of my mother's favorite songs talks about angels being among us. I wonder if Carolyn Nash is not one -- sent here to do great things that the average person could not do. Carolyn, thanks for inviting us into your life on your journey.
April 23, 2012
You know, as a parent I often say I wish I could get a bubble for my kids to live in to keep them safe ... this book solidified my want of that bubble. The gammit of emotions that coursed through me reading this, left me with an empty tissue box and an insurmountable respect for mom and son alike. I truly enjoyed this book. Well written, to the point storytelling ... a must read.
January 29, 2019
Up until 2 am to finish it. Liked the story and learned a lot of what a parent goes through living with a special needs child. Kudos to Carolyn for not wanting to give up as I could never have accomplished what she did.
January 5, 2018
Great book! Depressing and inspiring at the same time.
October 19, 2015
I found this book very compelling. Carolyn Nash describes how her life changed when she decided to adopt a son. Even though the child was only three, he had experienced severe neglect and abuse in his short life. As a result, he had emotional problems and became violent at times. I identified to a great extent with this story because I also adopted a son who had a very rough childhood. Our circumstances were different. Carolyn was a single mother, and I was married so our son grew up in a two-parent household. Our son was eleven when we adopted him, but he never exhibited violence. However, he did have other problems and was a challenge to raise. He had a variety of problems through the years, but now is in his forties, working and in a stable marriage. My heart goes out to the author who raised a child with more serious problems than our son and did it on her own. Actually she is still doing it as Abel was in his late teens when the book was written. If you have experience adopting a problem child, you will identify with the author and appreciate her candor. If you've never known a family who adopted an older child who had been neglected and abused, this book will open your eyes.
July 19, 2013
Incredibly gripping and touching autobiography about a woman adopting and raising a badly traumatized child.
Mit "Raising Abel" gelingt Carolyn Nash eine ergreifende und berührende Autobiografie.
Im Alter von 38 Jahren beschließt die Autorin, ein Pflegekind aufzunehmen und später zu adoptieren. Eine unglaubliche Herausforderung, weil der 3-jährige Abel ein von schwerem Missbrauch gekennzeichnetes Kind ist, dessen Entwicklung zu keinem Zeitpunkt normal verläuft.
C. N. schildert lebendig und einfühlsam das Heranwachsen ihres Sohnes bis zum Erwachsenenalter, ihre von unzähligen Problemen, Rückschritten, aber auch wunderbaren Momenten gekennzeichnete Mutter-Sohn Beziehung, getragen von einer unerschütterlichen Liebe und Hoffnung. Es ist gleichzeitig auch eine Geschichte über die Aufarbeitung ihrer eigenen Kindheitsprobleme.
Ein überaus empfehlenswertes Buch, das - einmal begonnen - kaum aus der Hand zu legen ist.
Mit "Raising Abel" gelingt Carolyn Nash eine ergreifende und berührende Autobiografie.
Im Alter von 38 Jahren beschließt die Autorin, ein Pflegekind aufzunehmen und später zu adoptieren. Eine unglaubliche Herausforderung, weil der 3-jährige Abel ein von schwerem Missbrauch gekennzeichnetes Kind ist, dessen Entwicklung zu keinem Zeitpunkt normal verläuft.
C. N. schildert lebendig und einfühlsam das Heranwachsen ihres Sohnes bis zum Erwachsenenalter, ihre von unzähligen Problemen, Rückschritten, aber auch wunderbaren Momenten gekennzeichnete Mutter-Sohn Beziehung, getragen von einer unerschütterlichen Liebe und Hoffnung. Es ist gleichzeitig auch eine Geschichte über die Aufarbeitung ihrer eigenen Kindheitsprobleme.
Ein überaus empfehlenswertes Buch, das - einmal begonnen - kaum aus der Hand zu legen ist.
March 11, 2012
A story of courage, anger, tremendous love, while raising an adopted special needs child - and learning to love oneself.
Had me enthralled from the get-go.
Absolutely captivating and moving.
Brava, Carolyn!
Had me enthralled from the get-go.
Absolutely captivating and moving.
Brava, Carolyn!
March 12, 2012
This was truly a heart rending story. Definitely not for the faint of heart. (Or the squeamish.) It is a testament to the redemptive power of unconditional love.
March 29, 2012
This book was painfully beautiful & heart wrenching. I found myself wanting to hug Abel. Wonderful book & a must read!
November 30, 2021
Only the fierce love of a mother!
Who can love a child that hits and destroys things, even attacks and verbally abuses? Only a mother can. And that child need not have come from the mother's womb, as this book movingly demonstrates. God bless the women everywhere who love their children and fight for them, even at expense to themselves. Under heaven, there's no greater gift to mankind. To the author, Carolyn, you are a blessing. Thank you for sharing your amazing life with us.
Who can love a child that hits and destroys things, even attacks and verbally abuses? Only a mother can. And that child need not have come from the mother's womb, as this book movingly demonstrates. God bless the women everywhere who love their children and fight for them, even at expense to themselves. Under heaven, there's no greater gift to mankind. To the author, Carolyn, you are a blessing. Thank you for sharing your amazing life with us.
March 13, 2023
I think I picked up this Kindle book for free years ago and last year started reading it because I’m a foster parent and I was curious about it. It a story of a little boy who got rough start in life and a foster mother who, by taking on a foster child, was able to heal her own self through the experience. I’ll tell you what from experience being a foster parent/adoptive parent makes you face the unresolved personal conflicts/childhood traumas etc. you have to deal with your own junk so you can help the child get through theirs.
October 10, 2020
This is the true story of a single mother who has an amazing commitment to her adopted son. She showed such strength and fortitude as she faced the ramifications of the severe emotional damage caused by early childhood abuse. Whew, if only ALL parents were this dedicated to the well being of their children. This book should be required reading so that everyone might have a better understanding of what some children experience. I look forward to reading more by this author.
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April 17, 2021Beautiful, but unbelievably heartbreaking too.
January 11, 2014
I got a free download of this book from Pixel of Ink for my Kindle. Now, some of the free books Amazon offers are a little sketchy but this one sounded interesting and so I went ahead and downloaded it. To say it was worth it would sound tacky, so I will just say it was a very good book and I was really glad I read it. I think it will stay with me for a long time.
I hadn't originally planned to read it right away, but I opened it to read a few paragraphs to get an idea of what the book was about. The book got my attention at the Prologue when that tiny child was talking about killing his mother with a big knife and I simply couldn't stop reading.
I won't rehash the plot because that seems kind of pointless. I will say that this book was sweet, tender, funny, had me in tears more than once, and completely horrified often. That two adult human beings could do even half the evil degrading stuff to that sweet innocent little boy is so beyond my comprehension that I'm gobsmacked. That a father could do to his daughter what that evil human did is equally mind boggling. This book gives in detail the long-lasting ramifications of childhood sexual abuse. I don't know how anyone can completely recover from that kind of trauma. That this book is non-fiction made it that more horrible. I think the author was very lucky to have the support that she had with all the wonderful professionals that helped her and the fact that she was able to became such a wonderful advocate for her damaged child.
I liked the writing. It was simple, flowed nicely and was was a very good read in the sense that I had a difficult time putting it down in spite of the rather grim aspects to the story.
Carolyn, for the person you are, you are a true hero and so is Abel for the hard fight and many struggles and the fact that he continues to persevere. The very best to both of you.
I hadn't originally planned to read it right away, but I opened it to read a few paragraphs to get an idea of what the book was about. The book got my attention at the Prologue when that tiny child was talking about killing his mother with a big knife and I simply couldn't stop reading.
I won't rehash the plot because that seems kind of pointless. I will say that this book was sweet, tender, funny, had me in tears more than once, and completely horrified often. That two adult human beings could do even half the evil degrading stuff to that sweet innocent little boy is so beyond my comprehension that I'm gobsmacked. That a father could do to his daughter what that evil human did is equally mind boggling. This book gives in detail the long-lasting ramifications of childhood sexual abuse. I don't know how anyone can completely recover from that kind of trauma. That this book is non-fiction made it that more horrible. I think the author was very lucky to have the support that she had with all the wonderful professionals that helped her and the fact that she was able to became such a wonderful advocate for her damaged child.
I liked the writing. It was simple, flowed nicely and was was a very good read in the sense that I had a difficult time putting it down in spite of the rather grim aspects to the story.
Carolyn, for the person you are, you are a true hero and so is Abel for the hard fight and many struggles and the fact that he continues to persevere. The very best to both of you.
April 30, 2012
The first word that comes to my mind about this book is “Amazing”. There is truly no other word for it.
Being human, we all have dreams & hopes for ourselves and visions of how our lives should be. Sometimes those dreams come true and sometimes they don’t. Carolyn Nash was an ordinary woman like you and me, with her own set of dreams & regrets. One of Carolyn’s regrets was that she did not have a child of her own. This was something she could remedy. She adopted a child who came from a family of parental abuse. This book deals with her journey there on. Dealing with a child is no ordinary task and it gets even harder when the child is dealing with PTSD. Treatment, medicines and therapists become a lifestyle for Carolyn and Abel. Raising Abel also in many ways forces Carolyn to come to terms with her own life and issues.
Often while reading memoirs or autobiographies I question whether the author has been completely truthful? Has this person been honest about his feelings and reactions? But in this particular case, I have no doubt. The author has been able to connect with her audience so well, that I felt that I knew her personally and was able to feel what she felt!
This is sad at places but mostly a heartwarming story that I would recommend everyone to read.
Being human, we all have dreams & hopes for ourselves and visions of how our lives should be. Sometimes those dreams come true and sometimes they don’t. Carolyn Nash was an ordinary woman like you and me, with her own set of dreams & regrets. One of Carolyn’s regrets was that she did not have a child of her own. This was something she could remedy. She adopted a child who came from a family of parental abuse. This book deals with her journey there on. Dealing with a child is no ordinary task and it gets even harder when the child is dealing with PTSD. Treatment, medicines and therapists become a lifestyle for Carolyn and Abel. Raising Abel also in many ways forces Carolyn to come to terms with her own life and issues.
Often while reading memoirs or autobiographies I question whether the author has been completely truthful? Has this person been honest about his feelings and reactions? But in this particular case, I have no doubt. The author has been able to connect with her audience so well, that I felt that I knew her personally and was able to feel what she felt!
This is sad at places but mostly a heartwarming story that I would recommend everyone to read.
January 22, 2012
Have you ever considered adopting or fostering a child? Have you ever wondered what it would be like to parent a child who has a history of trauma and loss? If you have ever entertained either of these thoughts, Raising Abel, is the book for you. Author, Ms. Carolyn Nash, presents an honest and accurate description of parenting a traumatized child.
In the memoir, Raising Abel, Ms. Nash begins her story as a single woman leading a calm, uncomplicated life. Ms. Nash escorts a friend to a foster care class and unexpectedly finds herself enamored with the idea. Soon, adorable three-year-old Abel becomes placed in her home, and her life changes dramatically.
At the innocent age of three, Abel has already suffered significant neglect, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse at the hands of his birth mother and father. In Raising Abel, Ms. Nash catapults readers into her and Abel’s day to day fits, challenges, and fleeting successes. Ms. Nash courageously invites us into her world where life is oftentimes chaotic and demanding, and sometimes intensely loving and charmed. Thank you, Ms. Nash for sharing your intimate story with us!
In the memoir, Raising Abel, Ms. Nash begins her story as a single woman leading a calm, uncomplicated life. Ms. Nash escorts a friend to a foster care class and unexpectedly finds herself enamored with the idea. Soon, adorable three-year-old Abel becomes placed in her home, and her life changes dramatically.
At the innocent age of three, Abel has already suffered significant neglect, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse at the hands of his birth mother and father. In Raising Abel, Ms. Nash catapults readers into her and Abel’s day to day fits, challenges, and fleeting successes. Ms. Nash courageously invites us into her world where life is oftentimes chaotic and demanding, and sometimes intensely loving and charmed. Thank you, Ms. Nash for sharing your intimate story with us!
April 5, 2012
Raising Abel is the story of Carolyn Nash, who at 38 becomes a mother for the first time when she fosters (and later adopts) Abel, a boy severely by his parents. The book tells their story from the moment they met through all the trials and troubles of childhood and adolescence. It is a story of hope and tragedy.
The first third of the book was heartbreaking and yet engaging. As Carolyn gets to know Abel, she slowly begans to discover the mystery of all the things that happened to him - and it is truly heartbreaking. But on this journey together, Carolyn is also discovering who she is, actually seeing herself through the first time through her love for Abel. It's truly a hopeful journey.
As Abel grows from a child to an adolescent, things are amped up. And I often wondered if their was any hope for Abel. But Carolyn never gives up on her son - although she does have to come to some very hard realizations.
Really a very nice memoir. I love true stories about people who are overcomers. And Carolyn and Abel are definitely that.
The first third of the book was heartbreaking and yet engaging. As Carolyn gets to know Abel, she slowly begans to discover the mystery of all the things that happened to him - and it is truly heartbreaking. But on this journey together, Carolyn is also discovering who she is, actually seeing herself through the first time through her love for Abel. It's truly a hopeful journey.
As Abel grows from a child to an adolescent, things are amped up. And I often wondered if their was any hope for Abel. But Carolyn never gives up on her son - although she does have to come to some very hard realizations.
Really a very nice memoir. I love true stories about people who are overcomers. And Carolyn and Abel are definitely that.
April 10, 2013
Woman decides she wants to adopt. Learns that you don't get to choose the child. You get what they have. She gets a severely and horribly damaged boy - damaged by abuse. Loves him.
If everything this woman said happened really happened, then she's a saint. At several times during this book I wanted to reach out and smack that kid for her since she wouldn't do it. She didn't believe in spanking. Deep breaths.
But she has the patience of a saint. Again, if it really happened like she says it did, then she was the best possible person in the universe to raise that child. And did a remarkable job of it.
This is a story of learning and heart-wrenching drama in dealing with the psychological effects of abuse on a child. If you have kids, it makes you sick. But it also makes you want to go home and hug them and squeeze them and cherish every last second you have on this earth with them.
If you have children, read this. If you want to have children some day, read this. If you don't want to have children, go ahead and read this.
If everything this woman said happened really happened, then she's a saint. At several times during this book I wanted to reach out and smack that kid for her since she wouldn't do it. She didn't believe in spanking. Deep breaths.
But she has the patience of a saint. Again, if it really happened like she says it did, then she was the best possible person in the universe to raise that child. And did a remarkable job of it.
This is a story of learning and heart-wrenching drama in dealing with the psychological effects of abuse on a child. If you have kids, it makes you sick. But it also makes you want to go home and hug them and squeeze them and cherish every last second you have on this earth with them.
If you have children, read this. If you want to have children some day, read this. If you don't want to have children, go ahead and read this.
March 3, 2013
I have read Nash's other books and really enjoyed them - her style of writing, her humor, her character development.
I don't know what I was expecting from "Raising Abel." I've read many other books about child abuse and its consequences (I am a survivor myself). I wasn't expecting the book I read.
I'll start with the first thing I saw - the cover. What a gorgeous piece of work! It fits with the book perfectly.
Then I got into the gut-wrenching meat of the book. Nash's soul baring story of her fostering and then adoption of Abel and the oh-so-painful years after made me cry, made me curse, brought back memories of my own childhood. Carolyn Nash and Abel are my new heroes. To triumph in the terrible adversity they both went through in their early lives is beyond commendable.
I don't think I would ever have the grace, the courage, the honesty to lay my life before readers like Nash did.
I don't know what I was expecting from "Raising Abel." I've read many other books about child abuse and its consequences (I am a survivor myself). I wasn't expecting the book I read.
I'll start with the first thing I saw - the cover. What a gorgeous piece of work! It fits with the book perfectly.
Then I got into the gut-wrenching meat of the book. Nash's soul baring story of her fostering and then adoption of Abel and the oh-so-painful years after made me cry, made me curse, brought back memories of my own childhood. Carolyn Nash and Abel are my new heroes. To triumph in the terrible adversity they both went through in their early lives is beyond commendable.
I don't think I would ever have the grace, the courage, the honesty to lay my life before readers like Nash did.
May 11, 2012
This book drew me in from the prologue. Haunting, yet uplifting this book shows the real trauma that happens when children are abused at an early age and the strength, determination and love it takes to help them through it. Carolyn Nash might not feel like a hero but she is one to me. Many people might have given up on Abel but she never did. She showed him what unconditional love really is.
This book is written in short episodes, which highlight dramatic events throughout Abel's childhood and Carolyn's own self discovery journey in therapy. If you are a foster parent, or thinking of becoming a foster parent this might be a good read. Its honest and maybe a bit scary but shows that you can get through it and what a huge difference you can make in the life of a child. This is a book that will stay with me for quite a while.
This book is written in short episodes, which highlight dramatic events throughout Abel's childhood and Carolyn's own self discovery journey in therapy. If you are a foster parent, or thinking of becoming a foster parent this might be a good read. Its honest and maybe a bit scary but shows that you can get through it and what a huge difference you can make in the life of a child. This is a book that will stay with me for quite a while.
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March 14, 2012It's hard to imagine what could have prepared Nash for the experience of parenting a child who had suffered the worst traumas imaginable. Indeed, Abel's history is horrific. Understandably, this leads over the years to behaviors (including violence, property destruction, hospitalizations and suicide attempts) that make parenting him difficult, to say the least, and Nash pulls no punches in reporting how bad it got or in admitting her utter helplessness in the face of his struggles. This transparency, and Nash's willingness to report back from a darker side of adoptive family life, is where Raising Abel is strongest.
Read Literary Mama's full review here: http://www.literarymama.com/blog/arch...
Read Literary Mama's full review here: http://www.literarymama.com/blog/arch...
August 23, 2016
It's hard to review a book like this. In the most technical sense, the writing is not the best. It reads like a clinical retelling of a series of events and doesn't really use a narrative style. I can't help feeling if it had been written in a narrative style, I would have spent the entire book bawling my eyes out. But it is still well worth the read.
Obviously, this is a true story, and what a story it is! I have nothing but respect for this woman and her courage to share her journey. I cannot fathom how she endured such an emotional roller coaster and I admire her strength and conviction to do the best for her son, no matter the emotional or material cost. This book offers a glimpse at the worst of humanity, but also shows us a shining example of humanity's best.
Obviously, this is a true story, and what a story it is! I have nothing but respect for this woman and her courage to share her journey. I cannot fathom how she endured such an emotional roller coaster and I admire her strength and conviction to do the best for her son, no matter the emotional or material cost. This book offers a glimpse at the worst of humanity, but also shows us a shining example of humanity's best.
December 22, 2013
Great book for educators in urban areas
While the events in this book could have happened anywhere, I think that this book has some real value for teachers in urban areas. While not every urban child has been witness to the level of abuse Abel has in this book (and so many come from loving and caring homes), every day children are struggling with traumatized reactions in the classroom, especially those who live e in violent neighborhoods. I think this book could be a valuable addition for many teachers to read during their training, to help better understand some of the struggles. There are lots of triggers in this book though. If you read it and know that you have trauma in your past, know that it may stir some things up.
While the events in this book could have happened anywhere, I think that this book has some real value for teachers in urban areas. While not every urban child has been witness to the level of abuse Abel has in this book (and so many come from loving and caring homes), every day children are struggling with traumatized reactions in the classroom, especially those who live e in violent neighborhoods. I think this book could be a valuable addition for many teachers to read during their training, to help better understand some of the struggles. There are lots of triggers in this book though. If you read it and know that you have trauma in your past, know that it may stir some things up.
March 28, 2012
This is an amazing book about a single woman who believes she is not worthy of love because of a deep seated secret from her past. She adopts a child who has been severely abused and taken from his parents at age three. The story revolves around her finding herself and remembering her past as she handles the multitude of problems that Abel brings to the table. With each new revelation of abuse, each violent outburst she learns more about herself.
I would recommend this book for anyone considering adopting a child with special needs or former abuse, raising a special needs child, or anyone who just loves a good book.
I would recommend this book for anyone considering adopting a child with special needs or former abuse, raising a special needs child, or anyone who just loves a good book.
August 20, 2012
Good book but brutal - not for the faint of heart. It's a vicariously traumatic read. About a single woman who chooses to adopt a little boy called Abel - who has been abused in just about every way possible by his birth-parents. Bit by bit, year by year, the aftershocks of this abuse continue to surface in Abel's thoughts and behaviours. Based on a true story. At one moment makes you despair in humanity, and wonder how people could do such awful things to an innocent little boy; and at another makes you marvel at the sheer determination and unconditional love displayed by the woman who adopts him.
January 10, 2012
Raising Abel is not always an easy read, emotionally speaking that is. The true story follows one woman’s chosen life, adopting and raising an abused child with nothing less than unconditional love. Her son, Abel, is tortured by unspeakable memories that trigger unpredictable outbursts of childish violence.
The result is a roller coaster of emotions as the reader experiences all the pain and anguish of a brave mother who simply refuses to give up on a tortured child. This isn't a story for the faint of heart, but perfect for the heart with the capacity to grow.
The result is a roller coaster of emotions as the reader experiences all the pain and anguish of a brave mother who simply refuses to give up on a tortured child. This isn't a story for the faint of heart, but perfect for the heart with the capacity to grow.
May 12, 2012
This book was amazing. I don’t usually read non-fiction, but the moment I saw the cover and the short description of this book I was intrigued. It’s a tough book to read – not in the sense that it’s hard to get through, but at times it’s such a harsh look in the world of both the traumatized Abel and his struggling and at times desperate mom. It is written beautifully, you experience every emotion alongside Carolyn as you see the little boy grow up. It’s haunting and I’m pretty sure it will stay with me for quite a while to come.
June 26, 2012
This is an all around great book, it does a wonderful job of showing trauma and it's impact on a family without dramatizing it. I think both the author and her children showed such courage to face the world and all it did to them. I hope that everyone involved in all parts of adoption read this book (and not just foster parents who are parenting kids with trauma), it gave me tremendous insight into another part of the world of adoption.
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