Walking In Daniel's Shoes

by Tom Mauser

A father's journey through grief, controversy, activism and healing following his son's death in the massacre at Columbine High School on April 20, 1999. The book describes the experiences of Tom Mauser, who became a nationally recognized gun control advocate who often spoke to crowds wearing the shoes worn by his son, Daniel, on the day of the massacre. Mauser describes the day of the massacre as well as the days, weeks and years afterwards. The book describes his struggles, his healing process, being arrested at NRA headquarters, spiritual experiences, adoption of a daughter from China, and dealing with the forgiveness issue, which included meetings with the parents of the two killers.

Genres: Nonfiction, True Crime

366 pages, Paperback

First published June 1, 2012

Reviews

[Ellen · Rating 5 out of 5]

You see things like Columbine on the news and wonder how anyone copes with something like that. How do you pick up the pieces and keep your family and yourself together? What would you say to the parents of your child's killers? How do you deal with incessant media attention?

Mauser provides an honest and direct account about how he made his way through one of the hardest experiences a human being can endure. It's a sad and heart-breaking book, but it's also a book that describes a family with affection, and--yes--a bit of humor.


The subtitle outlines the topics of the book: "a father's journey through grief, controversy, activism, and healing."

Mauser explains why he titled the book "Walking in Daniel's Shoes." It turned out that he was able to wear his son's actual shoes, and he often did wear them when he worked for causes related to the shootings at Columbine.

In the aftermath of Daniel's death, Mauser did 3 very brave things:

--He publicly advocated for tougher gun laws, especially those concerning the gun show loophole, which allowed the killers to gather their arsenal. Wherever you stand on gun control, you have to admire a grieving dad who stands up for what he believes in, even though it draws all kinds of the wrong attention. He recounts some of the e-mail exchanges he had with people who wanted to bait him. Some of those folks are really vicious.

--He met with the parents of the killers. It is hard to imagine how they were able to even start a conversation, but it sounds like they all were able to say what they wanted to say in a civilized way.

--He and his wife, Linda, adopted a girl from China, just a couple of years after the shooting.

This is a book that walks you through the darkest valleys, but also describes how one family found a path to healing.

[Megan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I wrote to Mr. Mauser in July requesting a copy of his book, which he self-published so he could have the freedom to tell his story his way. He signed a copy and shipped it to me from his home; I finished reading his 358-page story that was published in 2012, 13 years after the Columbine shootings in about a week, it was so engaging. Tom says himself at the end of his book that he's blunt - or at least has become so since losing his son - and I find his tone refreshing.

I so appreciate his questions like, "Can we allow people to grieve without having their actions and motives questioned?" (73), though I am troubled and saddened by his need to ask. Not only was Columbine rife with controversy for years after the murders, but his gun-control advocacy has garnered him everything from hate mail to death threats. Regardless of where you stand on the gun-control debate, surely name calling (especially the father of a murder victim) and vicious treatment is not acceptable. His story, among other things, details how he handled that with aplomb and courage.

His thoughts on faith, forgiveness and our role in reaching out to disturbed and hurting souls are commendable, especially after what he's been through. Mr. Mauser's personal, vulnerable narrative is an imperative part of the tragic story that is Columbine.

[Allie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm not one to get emotional when reading books or watching movies, but after hearing/reading about Columbine all my adult life, it didn't feel like something that actually happened until I read this, and I cried a few times while reading it. Everyone should read this. No review could do it justice.

[Curious Madra · Rating 4 out of 5]

I know I read bits of this book but this is excellent! Good description, I think this should be documentary film and I'm so sorry for ur loss as David sounded like a nice chap!

[Jen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a long love letter from a father to his son.

This book was difficult to read. It has taken me days to figure out how to even begin this review. The first few chapters especially had me bawling. There was less bawling as the book went on, though some parts still brought tears to my eyes.

Out of all of the kids, Daniel was one of the ones I felt most connected to from the Columbine massacre because he was exactly the sort of kid I would have wanted to be friends with at his age. Words cannot express the pain I feel for Tom Mauser and his family. The fact that so many of these kids were shot in the face makes me sick inside.

I liked how this book focused on Daniel and how through him, Tom was able to make changes to the world. Tom being able to wear and walk in his son’s shoes as he became an activist was especially touching.

As a gun owner, I support common sense gun laws and cannot fathom why any law-abiding citizen would have an issue with background checks for ALL guns and requiring parents to keep them locked up. I am also saddened that human lives are deemed less important than an amendment. Having seen the reactions of some gun activists, I have no doubts that Tom’s account of the ones he encountered are accurate.

Some parts of this book got a little repetitive but I liked the overall message shining through it. I’m glad Tom was able to direct his pain and grief into his attempts to make this country a safer place for kids like Daniel. I liked his messages about being more accepting of those with different beliefs than him, especially when a community is involved. I did feel like this got a little religious heavy at the end but wasn’t too preachy. I felt Tom expressed his beliefs and thoughts regarding gun violence and school shootings well.

Thank you, Tom, for sharing your story.

[Erica · Rating 5 out of 5]

I appreciate Tom Mauser's honesty about his struggles after Columbine. He talks about finding moments of peace after the tragedy and the satisfaction he gets from the work he does in Daniel's name, but he doesn't sugarcoat the lingering heartache. He is clearly passionate about his advocacy, but he is also refreshingly humble and relatable. Even those who don't agree with him politically might find themselves respecting him as a person and as someone with views that are thought out and articulated well. He is open about his feelings and what it's like to face the questions he does. Others going through the same kind of loss might find his words reassuring, and his experiences might provide inspiration to them when they struggle through the same heartbreak. He shows compassion to an extent but doesn't give pat answers to the forgiveness question. He is as honest as possible in answering the questions people put to him within these pages, but he admits that there's a lot of gray that he lives with and that is to be expected.

I admire him for self-publishing and taking on this hefty, heart-wrenching project so his and Daniel's stories could be told. I wish there were more thoughtful books out there like this about the victims to provide a more personal look at this epidemic of violence in America.

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

My heart breaks for the loss suffered by this author. I realize that this story was a story about a father, so it's not really fair to give this 3 stars because I wish it included more about Daniel. That being said, I wish it was a little less about the father and his journey since the tragic murder of his son. I wanted to know more about who Daniel Mauser was. I did learn a bit. I actually very much enjoyed this book. I do admit I did skip some of the stuff dealing with all the gun control issues. I personally agree with Tom Mauser and everything he is trying to do for gun control laws and awareness, but I found it a little boring to read about. I know that is an awful thing to say because it really is so very important.

This book gave me the urge to try to send a message to the author... but what does one say that hasn't already been said to this forever-grieving father a hundred times already? It breaks my heart even after all these years to think about what happened to those kids at Columbine. I'm glad I read this because it was good to hear about what the family went through. This man honors his son in many ways and he should be proud.

[Citri · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's very hard to rate this, because while it can get wordy and disorganized, it's also the outlet of the deep grief from a parent that lost his child. I feel for Tom immensely and his work to honor Daniel's memory by gun control advocacy is admirable.

[Jeri Silfies · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting but needed editing.

[Lin · Rating 5 out of 5]

Tom really shared his story about Columbine in this book, I cry evry time I read it

[Adam Murphy · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've read many Columbine-related books in my time, but Walking in Daniel's Shoes by Tom Mauser was probably the hardest to sit through. Putting the perspective of an honest father who lost an innocent child is hard to grasp. Mr Mauser is as genuine as possible in answering the questions people put to him within these pages, but he admits that there are a lot of greys that he lives with, and that is to be expected.

I was halfway through this book when I heard about the Uvalde Shooting, and the past patterns were eerily similar to now. Nothing has changed. Parents continue to grieve, and their children continue to die, and there's nothing America can do about it. What's going to happen when ALL of the children of America are gone? Who is going to save that country then?

[Harriett Milnes · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tom Mauser tells us his story of grief and activism after his son's death at Columbine. Tom is active in the anti-gun violence circles in Colorado. He speaks at hearings and rallies. He wears his son's shoes, that Daniel wore to school on April 20, 1999. He shares photos with us.