Breaking Through: Catholic Women Speak for Themselves

by Helen Alvare (Editor)

Catholic women are some of the most maligned, most caricatured, and most intriguing people in American society. America is flirting with the idea that being a Catholic female means saying "yes" to the faith as a private source of comfort, but "no" to living out its more countercultural moral and social teachings.
Catholic women are facing unprecedented questions about sex, money, marriage, work, children and the church itself -- questions with innumerable personal and societal repercussions. Is it even possible that the teachings of a 2,000 year old religion are still relevant for today's toughest issues? A quick tour of leading cultural indicators seems to say "no." But this is far from the whole story. Many women, courageously facing questions their mothers and grandmothers would never have encountered, are finding intellectually and spiritually satisfying answers within the framework of their Catholic faith. Nine such Catholic women -- varying widely in age, occupation and experience -- share personal stories of how they struggled toward the realization that the demands of their faith actually set them free. Their stories -- full of honesty, but ultimately hope -- shed new light and new clarity on women's continued attraction to the Catholic faith. Topics

Genres: Catholic, Nonfiction, Religion, Faith, Christian, Spirituality, Christianity

180 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2012

About the author

Helen Alvaré is a Professor of Law at George Mason University School of Law, where she teaches Family Law, Law and Religion, and Property Law. She publishes on matters concerning marriage, parenting, non-marital households, abortion and the First Amendment religion clauses. She is faculty advisor to the law school’s Civil Rights Law Journal, chair of the Task Force on Conscience Protection of the Witherspoon Institute (Princeton, New Jersey), president of the Chiaroscuro Institute (New York, New York), chair of the Catholic Women’s Forum, a consultor for the Pontifical Council of the Laity (Vatican City), an advisor to the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops (Washington, D.C.), and an ABC news consultant. She cooperates with the Permanent Observer Mission of the Holy See to the United Nations as a speaker and a delegate to various United Nations conferences concerning women and the family.

In addition to her publications in law reviews and other academic journals, Professor Alvaré publishes regularly at thepublicdiscourse.com, and in news outlets including the New York Times, the Washington Post, the Huffington Post, the Weekly Standard, and the Washington Examiner. She also speaks at academic and professional conferences in the United States, Europe, Latin America and Australia.

Prior to joining the faculty of George Mason University, Professor Alvaré taught at the Columbus School of Law at the Catholic University of America; represented the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops before legislative bodies, academic audiences and the media; and was a litigation attorney for the Philadelphia law firm of Stradley, Ronon, Stevens & Young.

Professor Alvaré received her law degree from Cornell University School of Law and her master’s degree in Systematic Theology from the Catholic University of America.

Reviews

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I remember when everyone was talking about this book, right after it came out. Some reviewers I really respect had good things to say about it and I'll be honest: I believed them.

I just had no real desire to read it for myself.

And then, THEN, I found myself with a copy of it, thanks to Amazon Vine. (True enough, I picked it out for myself. Curiosity? Compelled? Something!)

It's been collecting dust on my shelf all summer, and I decided that it was now or never.

And I have only this to say: WHAT! A! BOOK!

It's a collection of ten essays from a variety of professional women (almost all of them have letters after their names, and only one of them stands for a religious order). They're well-written and captivating in many ways.

For one thing: who knew Catholic women were so smart? (Yes, that's sarcasm.) For another, who knew there was so much Catholic women had to say? (No, that's not sarcasm. That's just me laughing...at myself.)

I don't think there's a topic in this book that's not controversial in some manner, and every one of them is dealt with in a way that had me nodding like a bobble-head.

My favorite essay was the first: "Fear of Children," written by the editor, Helen Alvaré. It's such a clear picture of how she felt and thought and the ways she changed: I caught tears in my eyes with a bit of surprise.

But wait, I loved the essay on religious life, too, by Sister Mary Gabriel. She described her life so poignantly, so wonderfully, so doggone happily...what's not to love?

Oh, but...the essay on same sex attraction really caught my attention, made me sit up, made me highlight and mark up my book.

And...

Well, actually, I marked this book up A LOT, so much that I'm going to be a bit embarrassed to share it. But how do you NOT highlight something like this:

"I could say, and do say, to anyone wrestling with a difficult situation or decision—just park in front of the Blessed Sacrament and bring it honestly to Jesus. He'll hear you, love you, and answer you. Maybe not right away, maybe not in the way you expect, but he will answer."

Or this:

"Engaging a culture does not mean embracing it, of course; it means countering its values with our own. To engage the culture on the ground, where we live, means countering materialism with simplicity; transience with rootedness; and coarseness with self-giving love. It means living lives of sacrifice and generosity, integrity and joy, and in doing so, quietly witnessing to our faith."

Highly, highly recommended.

[Amber · Rating 2 out of 5]

Alvare's collection of mini-essays does a fairly decent job of doing as it states- showing Catholic women speaking for themselves, clearing up some misconceptions about the way women work in the modern Church. It's too skewed, however, in that in the small amount of essays given all of the women only see one way, and they see in pretty stark black-and-white. There should have been several essays on the same topic from women seeing the issue from different angles (even if they end up at the same end, which would make the most sense). Also, the dogged Church-versus-feminism angle that shines through particularly in Alvare's own sections is tired and misinformed, as evidenced by the 'stances' that are 'against' feminism in her essays is restricted only to mainstream, White, sex-positive feminism- which, in current feminist circles, is the weakest and most critiqued form of feminism within the community of feminists as a whole. In all of the essayists rush to defend the Church as well, there is little to no acknowledgement of when and how the Church has failed women- and there is absolutely no doubt that the Church has failed women (though the extent is sometimes debatable). Instead, the essayists seem to postulate that the Church -as is- has nothing more to do to pastorally care for Her women, and that the existence of pro-female dogma means that said teachings are actually applied (and not, more often than not, ignored). This is, essentially, a collection of only one kind of Catholic woman all in agreement with one another, and does not reflect Catholic Women as a whole- or really even try to.

[Emily Pachla · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the different topics and points of view, however, I wish there were more from women of different backgrounds. Almost all of the contributors have advanced degrees. In the chapter about single motherhood, it would have been nice to have an actual Catholic single mother discussing her experience.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a really good book. I really enjoyed the varied observations of women in the church. No two women in the church have the same experience but we live in similar vocations and similar experiences. It was good to read a variety of story to understand varying experiences of women in the church who had come to realize the teachings of the church and why. Some of the stories shared are heart touching and moving. I recommended this to friends it was really good.

"mine is an identity that the secular world and the church seem unable to affirm at this point in history. In my view, the identity of the single Catholic woman is misunderstood and misrepresented in both spheres"(p.52).
"This lack of pursuit can easily lead to feelings of inadequacy for any woman; but for the Catholic woman, they may very well raise avoidable angst about vocation, purpose, and femininity"(p. 57).
"I call upon the Church and the culture to understand the experience of the single, Catholic woman. She has much to contribute"(p. 61).

"Love has a way of turning our plans on their heads, and it teaches us something wonderful in the process"(p. 71).
"It is astounding to realize the extent of the hidden burdens carried by the women we live with, work with, pray with, see every day- and presume all is well"(p. 72).
"All of us need to be received by others, to have our fundamental goodness affirmed. Then we can love in a way that sets others free"(p. 74).

"I also have the opportunity to integrate my faith into my daily life in the office, and this has enabled me to see how grace flourishes in unlikely places"(p. 82).
"Yet as anyone who has suffered knows, it is when we are weak and vulnerable that we are most open to letting our faith live"(p. 83).

"God always sees the end of the story before we do"(p. 115).
"God is never outdone in generosity, and when we give he multiplies our efforts to accomplish his goals, whether we see it or not"(p. 117).

"It means living lives of sacrifice and generosity, integrity and joy, and in doing so, quietly witnessing to our faith"(p. 164).
"Women often have a particular gift for building culture so understood"(p.166).

[Vikk Simmons · Rating 4 out of 5]

Breaking Through is definitely a thought-provoking book. Editor and contributor Helen M. Alvare has gathered a group of today's woman who are intent on practicing their faith amid the tumultuous changes in today's culture and who have a lot to say about their particular challenges as they strive to practice their faith.

Alvare's honest examination of whether children even play any part today in a woman's life is a candid response to world we live in today The call to religious life, the specific challenges of being a single mother, and the challenges faced by women in the area of contraception, abortion and medical care honestly capture the struggle others have had as they've walked their particular spiritual path.

These are not the voices you commonly hear and I appreciate these women who are willing to give voice to their journeys and their own examinations of faith.

[Maureen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was rather disappointed in this book. It does not show a variety of who Catholic women are. Nearly all the writers in the books are either doctors or lawyers. Maybe if I hadn't read "My Sisters The Saints" first I would have liked this one better. Or maybe I will appreciate it some time down the road but for now, I am disappointed.

[Lori · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was really disappointed with this book and don't understand how it got so many great ratings. First, this was not written by a wide variety of women. Nearly all the chapters were written by doctors or lawyers. I think everyone had a master's degree. I found the first chapter by the author rather offensive to those who aren't parents. The author kept talking about how parenting made her less selfish, and she couldn't imagine what she would be like if she never had kids. She made it sound like volunteering and offering your time and talents to other activities just was not good enough (because that was only for a "few hours instead of a few decades"). I understand that she is entitled to her own opinions, but she never mentioned the great things people without kids can do. I thought the chapter on single motherhood would at least be written by a single parent, but no. Also found the chapter on homosexuality extremely biased. Their argument was that homosexuals had a troubled childhood, and that homosexuals can change their behavior if they want to. I believe research is still out on this, and it's not only naïve but unfair to only discuss one part of the research. Again, I was extremely disappointed and rather embarrassed to recommend this book to any of my friends but especially those who aren't Catholic.

[Jenn · Rating 2 out of 5]

Something about the fact that each writer is highly educated made me feel that the perspective was a little limited and accessible mostly to those with college degrees and incomes well above the poverty line. Also the essay on homosexuality felt like a review of scientific studies, not at all helpful to anyone grappling with Catholic Church teaching on a personal level.

[Peggy Haslar · Rating 4 out of 5]

Unxpectedly rich with the insight of experience and research. Reading this as a book club discussion group selection, the timing of the chapter on how lay women can help address the horror of scandal was a blessing indeed. When Catholic women speak for themselves, their desire to "speak the truth in love" shines.

[Stuart · Rating 3 out of 5]

Upon receiving this book, I was confused as to why Our Sunday Visitor asked me to review this book, but God must have wanted me to learn a little bit more about the fairer sex, and I certainly did reading this book. There are ten chapters in this book, with two written by the editor Helen M. Alvare and eight by other notable Catholic women. Topics include contraception, dating, careers, single motherhood, and many others.

The most interesting chapter to me was Chapter 3: Sex, Mating, and the Marriage "Market" by Elise Italiano. This chapter is aimed at the single Catholic woman, and though I am no longer on the "market," I remember what it was like to be looking for the one and wondering if she even existed. She does by the way. From my own personal experience, I have seen that there are many more single Catholic women who care about their faith than single Catholic men. I say that because most Catholic men who truly care about their faith are probably on the path to priesthood. So I can only imagine how helpless some of these women must feel looking for Mr. Right. A blog that might be of some benefit to all you single Catholic girls out there is appropriately called Single Catholic Girl. (singlecatholicgirl(dot)com)

This was a tough book for me to rate as a man as I am definitely not the intended audience. Some of the essays/stories to read even a man could relate to on some level. Other essays, I just found myself wanting to get through them. I can see the merit in a book of this nature, as these are women who are true Catholics and who follow the Church's teachings. I believe any Catholic woman will get something from at least one essay in this book but all might not necessarily apply to her. For this reason, I give it somewhere between 3 to 3.5 out of 5 stars. I'd probably borrow it from a friend or the library.

[Andrew · Rating 3 out of 5]

There is much debate about the role of women in the Catholic Church these days. We hear many women who are critical of the teachings and traditions of the Church in areas that touch on the lives of women. But how many of those questioning voices come from Catholic women? Here is a collection of essays from such Catholic women, in which they address their own understanding of the Church’s teachings and practices. These women defend their faith and argue strongly for the merits of the positions held by the Church. These are not women who are blindly obedient, following the Church uncritically. Rather, these are women who have questioned, challenged, and struggled with their faith, and have come to an understanding that is in agreement with the Church.

I cannot, in truth, confess to being in agreement with all of the positions of these writers. And, as someone who disagrees, I can say that these essays are unlikely to change the minds of many (perhaps most) who hold differing opinions on these matters. However, there is still much value in these essays, because they show that it is possible to arrive at an agreement with the Church through reflection and critical analysis. They demonstrate that the faithful are not, necessarily, blind dupes, obediently following the Church without giving any thought to what they profess to believe, as they are too often portrayed by those in opposition to the Church. From such a recognition, we might better find common ground in dialogue, and, if not agreement, at least a measure of understanding.

[Julie Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is not really my sort of book, yet when I received the review copy and flipped through it my eye was caught by something that sparked a note of recognition and made me think. Picking it up when cleaning off a desk a couple of days later the same thing happened. Which made me think this is not the ordinary "that sort of book."

What sort?

You know. About women. All telling things from their point of view. *yawn*

But this one seems ... different. And that in and of itself is novel enough to make me take a dash at it.

Final: I actually really liked this book. These are all intelligent women who were fully part of modern society and then, in a variety of ways, realized that the whole truth was in a direction they didn't expect. Aha - welcome to my life!

[Jackie St Hilaire · Rating 5 out of 5]

At first I thought this book would be conservative but I was pleasantly surprised at the subject matters and view points of the women authors.

The women did break through many old beliefs that we have been brought up with, which were never discussed unless you were encouraged to look further than the 1960's.

Those of us who were fortunate to get educated after Vatican II became aware of the many controversies facing women in the church, more importantly the Catholic Church.

Chapter 6 deals with the Church sexual abuse scandal and chapter 8 same sex attractions. Important topics facing the Catholic church and other Christian churches.

Although this book will probably be read by more women than men, it will make a good book for small study groups.

[Veronica Schram · Rating 4 out of 5]

Not only was this book well written, but it does a great job at addressing the many issues that women (of all ages) struggle with when it comes to their life as a Catholic being. While some chapters were more pertinent to my own personal experiences, I highly recommend this book to all Catholic women who struggle to find a place in the twenty-first century. As Catholics, we all question how we can remain faithful in practice and in thought in a society that often discourages or seems to attack our beliefs. This book does not have all the answers, but it is most definitely helpful to read about other women's struggles, questions, and how they came to terms with their Catholic identity.

[Renee · Rating 4 out of 5]

Breaking Through is a collection of 10 essays by 9 Catholic women. These are real women who have struggled at times with Church teachings but have come to understand what it means to be Catholic. They explore simpler topics such as parenting and religious life but also delve into more difficult topics such as working women and single moms and even into controversial areas of contraception, same-sex attraction and the sex abuse scandal.
This is not a book to be read in one sitting. I plan to go back and reread each of the essays when I have more time to ponder and think.

[Jerilyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having trouble explaining what you know to be true? Feeling alone in your beliefs? Feeling doubts when bombarded with messages that contradict teachings of the Church? This collection of essays, written by well-educated, professional women, will help you to ask the hard questions and begin to seek answers. They write with compassion, humility, intelligence and integrity. I still don't have all of the answers, but reading this book has helped me in thinking through the tough issues of today.

[Mary Ellen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Nine women examine contemporary issues from a Catholic viewpoint: Parenting, contraception, sex and "mating", consecrated religious life, women as breadwinners, sexual abuse, the hazards of "having", same-sex attraction, single mothering. Quotable quote: "For those of us who find ourselves single, we can't help but exchange glances in the pew saying, 'Do you feel like the leper Jesus was talking to or what?'"
The hard questions asked and answered, in engaging, readable style. Highly recommended!

[Amanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed most of the essays in this book. I thought that there was good research where appropriate and intelligent thoughts behind the more personal sections. There is a variety of topics and authors so some essays may "speak" to each reader more than others. I believe my favorite may have been the one written by a nun. She writes about the love and joy that made her choose a religious life without ever sounding like she's defending that choice.

[Liz · Rating 3 out of 5]

A series of essays on topics facing women today, this book covers what you would expect, but also some topics I would not have expected. Great chapters on single motherhood, Catholic culture, homosexuality and working moms. Not the most attractive packaging, but full of thought provoking and well written essays.

[April · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was interesting, but some of the essays didn't delve deep enough. It seemed a little superficial, and in some senses pointless. But, it's most redeeming quality was listening to women speak up for their faith, and the fact that it's a countercultural voice.

[Lara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thoughtful, hopeful and insightful essays from well-educated, orthodox Catholic women. Very worthwhile...not the stereotypical views one often hears from "Catholic" women in the media today. Doesn't shy away from issues facing today's women, regardless of vocation. Very refreshing!

[Lisa · Rating 4 out of 5]

4.5 A quick read with chapters from various well-educated Catholic women about how their Catholic faith informs their world view.

[Dorinda Chiappetta Plaisance · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding.

[Louise · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a book of essays by nine Catholic women who vary in age, occupations, and experience. This book is filled with hope, honesty, and is very counter cultural.

[Bobbi Aschwanden · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great insight! Thoughts on contraception, sexual preference, etc are presented in a very logical, fact based way. Highly recommend if you want a perspective that isn't from an "old, celibate man." :)

[Joann · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent and thought-provoking testimonies from Catholic women who struggled with or are thinking about various parts of Catholic teaching.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Just excellent!

[Emily Barnes · Rating 3 out of 5]

I appreciated what each individual brought to this book, but I didn't find it all that ground breaking or different. Was hoping for a bit more

[J · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 stars

Educated, professional and high achieving Catholic women discuss how they found Truth, and ultimately beauty, in the teachings of the Catholic Church. Sensitive to the modern culture but unflinchingly faithful to the Church. Each chapter/essay is written by a different author about a specific hot-button topic.

I especially liked the essays by a nun about finding joy in religious life (I had never heard her particular perspective before and it was refreshing) and the essay on same sex attraction (compassionate, scientifically based and hopeful). The essay on modern dating was okay but had an annoyingly whiny and self-absorbed (millennial) undertone.

This book will definitely prompt discussions, if read in a group!

Minus half a star due to the contributions of the book's editor. She let this otherwise spectacular book down in multiple ways:
- The marketing of the book and the Introduction (written by the editor) set a weird tortured and conflicted tone. Initially, I hesitated reading this book because I though it was going to be a collection of dissenting female voices criticizing the Church. Actually, it is the opposite. Why the deception and unnecessary vagueness? It felt more like trickery than outreach. I understand the editor feels like she and the other essayists are coming from attacked positions, but she doesn't express herself elegantly, clearly or joyfully.
- The essay contributed by the editor on single moms felt academic and uncompassionate. I was expecting this chapter to be written by a Catholic single mother about the challenges she personally faces. It lacked the sensitivity and intellectualism of the other essays. I agreed with her thesis but was turned off by her writing. I don't think it would win anyone over from the other side.
This essay also was the only one without a short bio about the author at the end. I wanted to know who was writing to understand her point of view better and then I realized it was the editor! I thought it was weird that the editor would allow an apparent formatting error on her own essay.
- The Afterward (written by the editor) was okay, but still have vague tortured themes.
- Overall, I would highly recommend skipping the editor's writings. They bring down the tone of the book. Without them, this book would be a perfect 5.

[Jeffrey · Rating 4 out of 5]

I echo what many others have said - a great book, but could use some more diverse voices (almost all the contributors were lawyers or had a doctorate level degree), and it would seemed to have been more impactful if a single mother had written the chapter on single motherhood.