Falling Sideways

by Tom Holt

From the moment Homo Sapiens descended from the trees, possibly onto their heads, humanity has striven towards civilization. Fire. The Wheel. Running Away from furry things with more teeth than one might reasonably expect—all are testament to man's ultimate supremacy. It is a noble story and so, of course, complete and utter fiction. For one man has discovered the hideous that humanity's ascent to civilization has been ruthlessly guided by a small gang of devious frogs. The man’s name is David Perkins, and his theory is not, on the whole, widely admired, particularly not by the frogs themselves, who had invested a great deal of time and effort in keeping the whole thing quiet.

Genres: Fantasy, Humor, Fiction, Science Fiction, Comedy, Urban Fantasy, Comic Fantasy

416 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2002

About the author

Tom Holt (Thomas Charles Louis Holt) is a British novelist.
He was born in London, the son of novelist Hazel Holt, and was educated at Westminster School, Wadham College, Oxford, and The College of Law, London.
Holt's works include mythopoeic novels which parody or take as their theme various aspects of mythology, history or literature and develop them in new and often humorous ways. He has also produced a number of "straight" historical novels writing as Thomas Holt and fantasy novels writing as K.J. Parker.

Reviews

[Aiyana · Rating 5 out of 5]

Brilliant. Frustrating. Messes with your head. This is a book where, every time you think you know what's going on, it changes around again. I wouldn't quite define it as absurdist literature, but only because it's a little too confusing to even fit in a category. There's plenty of humor, and also a good number of times when I was tempted to throw the thing against the wall. It's like a season of Dr. Who written by someone on a bad acid trip. I totally want to read it again.

[Claire · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tom Holt isn't for everyone. He's like a cross between Terry Pratchett and Piers Anthony. I personally enjoy his books, although his Portable Door series will forever be my favourites.

I picked up this one in a second hand book store, and thought to myself that I hadn't read any humorous books in ages. I was looking forward to it. And of course I wasn't disappointed. Tom Holt is one of the very few authors who can make me laugh out loud as I'm reading. He has a distinctive style; most of his characters you find you guiltily like (although they have very few redeeming qualities), and his endings are usually anti-happy. Not sad, not tragic - just mediocre. And realistic, despite the insanely unrealistic storyline. I love them.

This one is funny. There's rather a lot of frogs in it. And a witch. And some policeman. Oh, and quite a bit of sugar, too. It's confusing, and baffling, but you're supposed to be, so that's okay.

It's not everyone who can make the day brighter when you see a tradesman calling himself 'Honest-anything', but Holt manages. Give it a go, if you're a fan, but for a first time reader, I'd go for 'The Portable Door' instead.

[Rachel Rice · Rating 3 out of 5]

So this book has been on my shelves for more than 20 years... yes, you heard me right, lol 😆. In an effort to finally get to my back catalogue as it were of unread books, I decided it was about time I read it! This really was a madcap adventure, with frogs, a fifteenth century witch, clones, bags of sugar, and elevators to the ' homeworld', think Douglas Adams on acid! A really fun and funny read and wildly imaginative and just plain bonkers!

[Amill · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not his best one

[M.G. Mason · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is only my second Holt surprisingly, the first being The Portable Door earlier last year. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I gather he is very popular amongst fans of Terry Pratchett but I think comparisons here are wrong. I find Holt's work far less like Pratchett and perhaps more along the lines of Jasper Fforde in terms of tone and style. Pratchett's plots are straightforward and easy to summarise. Based on the now two books I have read by Holt, his are not so easy to quantify.

Falling Sideways is a fun, complex, silly yet clever romp of a tale about another inept yet ultimately likeable employee (rather like in The Portable Door) who has a strange theory about the origins of the human race; this theory most certainly does not tally with evolution as we have come to understand it. Ultimately, we have been led and guided by a group of sentient frogs who are effectively or gods. The problem is that this theory is true and that our creators are from another world and pretending to be harmless indigenous amphibians.

Perkins is also madly in love with a woman that he can never be with. Oh no, this isn't some soppy love story about how she's too hot or popular for him, or would never look at him until he gets a sports car... she's actually been dead 400 years and he's fallen in love with a portrait of her. what's more - he's convinced that every day he goes to see the painting, she's making rude gestures at him while he isn't looking.

Well, he thinks he could never be with her until his friend sells him a lock of hair that he claims belonged to the fair Jacobean maiden; the same friend then introduces him to a man named Honest Dave who claims to be able to clone people. Taking the chance to resurrect her, he scrapes up the money. It doesn't end well and Perkins soon finds himself at the centre firstly of a murder and then an art theft.

This is a daft yet ultimately fun romp that put me in the mind of Robert Rankin with quick one-liners, amusing pop culture references and some political satire without being too high brow. It's well written and flows easily - one of those books where 100 pages have slipped by before you've even realised it. Pretty much as expected from this author and the genre but it didn't set me ablaze.

If anything, it gets too convoluted in the second half; this is a shame because the first half shapes up to be quite promising with its silly twists and turns. Not bad, but not great either.

[Nathan Dehoff · Rating 5 out of 5]

While Robert Rankin claims to have invented the term “Far-Fetched Fiction” in hopes of getting his own shelf at the bookstore, I don’t know that he’d necessarily be the only one whose books would end up there. From what I’ve read of Holt, I think he could also qualify for this category. The two books I’d previously read of his, and a lot of his others as well if the descriptions are to be believed, deal with specific myths or legends. Falling Sideways is a little different in that it doesn’t specifically reference any earlier works, but it’s no less funny for that. What starts out as a story about a shy nerd who falls in love with a historical figure and somehow obtains a lock of her hair AND finds a cloning factory later becomes one of frogs from outer space with magical powers of persuasion influencing life on Earth as part of a convoluted plan. Confused yet? Well, it’s hard not to be when each new bit of exposition contradicts much of the last, and several of the characters are clones of other characters. The theme of frogs pervades the story, and when frogs take on human form and humans are convinced they’re frogs, you can never be totally sure what’s going on. One frog mentions that their homeworld is in the Sirius system, and when the main character says that’s the Dog Star, the amphibian replies, “Dog Star? With a ‘D’? Must be a typo.” I have to wonder if Holt might have been thinking (even if not consciously) of Douglas Adams’ Frogstar, said to be “the most totally evil place in the Galaxy.” There’s also a frog claiming he had to take human form to play the role of God, because he “just couldn’t get the idea of a frog-shaped god to catch on with these people.” He doesn’t mention the Egyptian frog goddess Heqet. Anyway, in addition to its charmingly ridiculous plot, the book also has a lot of amusing asides and a generally enjoyable writing style.

[Tracey · Rating 4 out of 5]

David Perkins, a nebbishy computer programmer is in love with a woman .. unfortunately, this woman was burned at the stake 400 years ago & his only "contact" has been thru a portrait at a local art gallery, which he swears has stuck its tongue out at him more than once.
He comes upon a bizarre little shop - Honest John's House of Clones, and soon afterwards, discovers that a lock of hair of his beloved's is up for auction. This seeming coincidence (and a great many others) have been perpetrated by raniform beings from another planet... beings that, once they visit Earth, are mostly mistaken for small, green beings that hop about on lily pads & eat flies.

This is the first Tom Holt I've read & found it quite fun, if a bit convoluted at times. Comparisons with Douglas Adams are apt & I'll probably try to hunt down some more of his work - especially with titles like Snow White and the Seven Samurai and You Don't Have to be Evil to Work Here, But it Helps.

[John · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tom Holt's books are crazy and convoluted. The ultimate in humorous escapism, I enjoy his humor at the end of a day (after working in a humorless industry). I liked this book, but the plot in this one took so many twists and turns that my head was spinning by the end. Tom Holt is either a genius, insane or on drugs - or maybe all three. I like the writing style, it's pretty much like the dry conversational humor of a British sit-com. Here is an example of the style (a verbose way of saying he can't keep your head above water):
"It was hard enough trying to keep his head above the meniscus of the riding tide of terror with only the rubber ring of fortitude and the polystyrene float of hope to keep him from going under."
That's the kind of verbiage his books are filled with. If you like dry British Humor mixed with science fiction you would like this book and his others (I hate to keep comparing him to Douglas Adams and Hitch hikers guide to the galaxy but that's the best comparison). If that's not your style - stay away.

[Jsrott · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was easily the most preposterous book I have read in years. In fact, it could be THE most preposterous book. Having said that, I thoroughly enjoyed it. The description of the book provided doesn't begin to scratch the surface of where this book goes, and goes without looking back. But the journey was worth it for the sheer happy weirdness. I've read Holt before and now I'm more determined than ever to read the rest of his body of work. Genius. Addendum- I had the benefit of being able to read this on a trip to Wisconsin, so was able to read it more or less in one sitting, and I think that definitely helped. Otherwise I'm not sure I would have been able to figure out where on "Earth" I was in the story next time I picked it up.

[Erik · Rating 2 out of 5]

Holt is really funny, but I feel like the story got away from him here. It seemed like he was making up the rules of his universe as he went along, simply to further the plot. I liked the two main characters, David and Phillipa, and would have enjoyed more interaction between them instead of so much exposition of the weird reality that David finds himself in as the book progresses. It also had a fairly long and drawn-out ending that could have been better. Overall, I'd say this book started strongly but slowly ran out of ideas, although I did enjoy Holt's dry and very English sense of humor (or should I say 'humour'?)

[Sbjs · Rating 4 out of 5]

Definitely one of Tom Holt’s better books! Every now and then his books get a bit too clever and bogged down, and I measure them all against the genius that is _Who's Afraid of Beowulf?_ This one had a nice balance between the quirky philosophical loop-de-loops and the triumph of the individual over fate (God, frogs, whatevs) with a healthy dollop of British cultural references (so be ready to fire up your search engine and learn something new)

[Philip Holmes · Rating 4 out of 5]

Oh, how I loved this. A friend recommended Holt to me, knowing that I was a big fan of fantasy, if not comedic fantasy specifically. (Aside from Terry Pratchett, who doesn't count because anybody who enjoys fantasy has to include the master). Falling Sideways is absurd, and wonderfully so, thrusting everyday people into extraordinary situations. The characters are delicious; empathic and frustrating, optimistic and involving, and the plot has some surprising and hilarious twists.

[Miss C. · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is the reason that I fell in love with fantasy books. Hard to follow at times and lots of frogs!

[Roy Burgess · Rating 4 out of 5]

Brilliant imagination. One of those books that, just when you think you know what is going on, everything changes!

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is the second novel I have read from Tom Holt and I think I enjoyed the first one more. I liked the humour and the absurdity of this storyline and I find him a little like maybe Douglas Adams or the writers of Red Dwarf, Doug Naylor and Rob Grant, all of whose work I have enjoyed. I read so much historical fiction and novels that have a tendency to bleakness that it's nice to be able to read a book that makes you smile. I found the plot of this book though a little too convoluted. It felt less like a complicated plot and more like things were being thrown at us purposely to confuse which I didn't particularly enjoy. The whole frog thing was good though, that made me smile.

I will read more by this author and have already bought another of his books so watch this space for more.

[Stuart Tomlin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have always been a fan of 'chase novels'. Thriller/action stories where usually the hero or heroes are being hunted, and they have to save the day.

This is not on the face of it one of those. I was bought this book some time ago by my Mum who thought I might like it. I decided to read it only because I'd run out of other things at home to read.

I am so happy that I did, I now buy this book for other people.

This is a bizarre story that you can only truly enjoy if you leave your disbelief in another room before starting it. But if you do, it will genuinely have you laughing your arse off.

[mantareads · Rating 1 out of 5]

One of those books that try very, very hard to be Funny and Quirky, but has no real story, colour, nor character underneath all the salad dressing and the bells and whistles.

I gave up after I realised I actually couldn't care less what happened to the unlikeable, bland protagonist and his unlikeable antagonists; and didn't care for aN0tHeR hiJiNk into a sPacEshIp with RivEtInG fRoGs.

I mean, if you like the Try Desperately Hard to Make You Laugh With Witty (now painfully outdated) Pop Culture Asides kind of British writing, you might like it. I don't like drinking aged milk.

[Mae !!!!! · Rating 3 out of 5]

God is a frog and I love it -spoilers-


This book was actually so cool and I loved the endless plot twists and endless Johns and the subtle character development over time it was such a good book
Somebody get David out of debt I swear to Honest John (cheeky reference there), his dad is literally God and wrote his entire life can't you just write him to be financially stable, this man owns a whole town and can't buy Philippa her fancy cheese
uurk.
This book has given me trust issues, nothing is real except British Columbia and it's only what I think it is because some frog said he wants me to think that because he's a convict on the loose and somehow this makes sense to me now, also everybody I know could be a clone of them made from swamp goo and frog-powered computers...?
Good, funny and intriguing writing style though (used lots of big boy words)
Overall: rivvet

[Ron · Rating 3 out of 5]

A boy falls in love with a painting then gets a lock of girl in the picture and visits Honest John's cloning operation to get the girl of his dreams. This being a Tom Holt comedy, nothing is as it seems. The hero turns out to be descended from an alien species and not who he thought he was. Neither was the girl. Plenty of mind twists typical of Tom Holt before the reader finds the a "happy" end of the book.

[Steve S · Rating 4 out of 5]

That may be the weirdest book I've ever read.

It's like it was written by a middle school boy who kept thinking, wouldn't it be cool if the characters. ... without so much as consideration if one thing could logically lead to the other. Then It's also loaded with strange asides and off beat humor.

All in all, it was actually a fun read, but I'm sure it is not for everyone.

[Debbie Pearson · Rating 5 out of 5]

Irreverent humor, excellent writing and emorable characters

Great off beat comedy. The premise is ludicrous, and entirely entertaining. Similar to the writings of Terry Pratchett. The writing is spot on. I laughed out loud several times. Highly recommended, especially for those that enjoy irreverent humor and memorable characters

[Chantelle M. Arneaud · Rating 2 out of 5]

I picked up this book because of the style of writing, however, I found it lacked plot and by the time I was 2/3 of the way through that was really getting on my nerves. The character flits from scene to scene with no discernible goal.

[Mark Scrooby · Rating 4 out of 5]

What you’d expect from a Tom Holt book. More storylines than cops in a donut shop and as confusing as quantum mechanics to a four year old. But a great read that almost made sense by the end of the book.

[Amy Jennings · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting concept and as ever with Tom Holt novels, delightfully quirky and filled with sardonic humour. I felt it fell a little flat towards the ending, but overall an enjoyable light holiday read.

[Boulder Boulderson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Proof positive that you can write a novel with no plot and barely any characters...it's Holt, so it's still pretty readable, but it comes across more as "how little effort can I get away with" than "here's a great comic novel".

[Steven Gauthier · Rating 3 out of 5]

A breathless, imaginative 400 page roller coaster ride; it’s impossible to predict what skeevie adventure will occur next. Not everything knits together well; it’s probably best not to look into details too closely.

[Christine Hassan · Rating 3 out of 5]

The book had its moments and was definitely an original approach to things. I wouldn't call it "Brilliantly funny" like one of the reviews does. It is amusing and takes unexpected turns on the drop of a dime. Good enough that I would consider trying another one.

[Barbara R. · Rating 3 out of 5]

Not my genre

Then again, what IS this genre? It is like the author is hallucinating. Long, rambling, run-on sentences. An implausible plot. And yet, I read (skimmed) it to the end just to see what poor Dave had to contend with next.

[Usfromdk · Rating 2 out of 5]

Closer to one star than three - this was a disappointing read.

[Robin Winter · Rating 5 out of 5]

Without spoiling the story, this book is smart and funny, and will turn you on your head a few times. Think Neil Gaiman meets Douglas Adams.