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The Complete Idiot's Guide to Reading Body Language: Everything You Need to Understand What People Aren t Saying
Using both photos and line art, "The Complete Idiot's Guide(R) to Reading Body Language" reveals and explains the visual tells to be found in faces, eyes, and lips; the positions of hands, arms, and legs; stances; gestures; the uses of everyday objects; and more. Additionally, strategies to elicit body language are detailed as well.
336 pages, Paperback
First published April 2, 2013
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Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews
June 26, 2013
Despite its interesting title I found this book full of banalities, pretentious pseudo-scientific rules about how to read persons like an open book (“and have them eating out of your hands”- according to the author) and other fiddlesticks for the select use of gullible dummies. I would put this book in the same category as astrology, chiromancy, homeopathy (one molecule of stuff in one gallon of water acquiring miraculous healing powers), the power of prayers (sort of lobbying God for something, but with no cash involved), positive attitude solutions (by deceiving yourself that something good is going to happen to you, makes it really to occur, like transforming a period of drought into a monsoon deluge by willpower only), biorhythms’ theories and other snake oil stuff list one can continue by himself.
To convince, the author is asserting that secret service professionals trained in body language reading have an accuracy rate of over 76 percent. If so, how come the CIA and FBI agents did not red this guy, Snowden, and that three months after being fully vetted, he was allowed to make a fool of all the lavishly decorated generals and admirals in charge of keeping the most strategic US secrets?
In my opinion body language is no more revealing that words people may utter. I remember that as a fresh immigrant, my internship boss, a good man, told me in a paternalistic way that by not looking to other people faces, I would never get a job, being suspected as a devious person (fortunately it ended well for me; some employers are more interested in making money than respecting well-worn clichés). He was unaware that in some cultures watching one's face is sometimes impolite, because if for example the boss is lying to you (as it happened to me), you will delicately spare him the embarrassment of reading the lies in his eyes and let him hope that he fooled you; analyzing his words is enough to correctly size the situation. Anyway, reading faces is even today to me like intruding into someone privacy and sophisticated cultures try to avoid this. So much for body signals meaning, especially in an increasing multicultural society like ours, where is arrogant to suppose that one standard of behavior constitutes “one size fits all”. To me, other criteria are more objective, like watching (if possible) how people are driving their cars, which speaks volumes about their IQ and how efficient they are. Speaking of body language, I could not understand the gesture of two persons hitting each other’s fists, gesture made popular by Michelle Obama in 2008 and probably signifying “we did it!”, until I watched the old movies with “the three Stooges”; but why in the world The First Lady, a truly smart person, would behave like those mentally challenged personages is still a mystery to me. Maybe she did it to please the biases of stupid crowds who elected Bush president to the most powerful job on earth, on the criterion that he is “the most likeable companion to drink a beer with” (not a valid criteria in light of the disastrous results for this country).
To me, the book ideas go in the wrong direction, in short, appearances shall not prevail over substance. The body language alone does not tell anything about credentials, character, honesty and personal achievements, things which really matters and make a person what he is. In my childhood years, among other sound precepts, I was told that “clothes do not make a person”, meaning that you should judge a person by his intrinsic value not by appearances which are in most cases misleading. Of course I am not speaking about extremes: shabby clothes, negligent hygiene, etc. And betraying words can by more reviling than body language (if body language is reviling at all, which I doubt). For example I have heard engineers discussing a technical problem saying “I believe that…” which to me disqualify them as professionals, because in engineering you either know and are sure of something, or do not (as my school teacher taught us pupils, believing is for use limited only in church, e.g. when someone buys the scam of transubstantiation doctrine for example, otherwise one has to verify anything and judge by himself). A perfect example how appearances are misleading is Tony Blair, for me the prototype of the professional liar with his passionate conviction speeches and flawless body language (according to this book), and most of the politicians for this matter, but if one knows the truth and compare it with what they are saying, it is easy to see them for what they are, liars. Appearances with no substance (Texans would say “all hat and no cattle”) can only fool people who are biased and simple-minded. No body language training will allow someone to be a perfect impostor, sooner or later soon people will find out.
In conclusion, and this is my strictly personal opinion, the book is a complete waste of time, nothing to help the reader in the day-to-day life; I had to stop reading long before I could ended it, and I cannot agree more with its title: “the complete idiot’s guide to ….”. The great Barnum is credited with saying “there’s a sucker born every minute”, and gullible people probably make the bulk of this book’s readers.
To convince, the author is asserting that secret service professionals trained in body language reading have an accuracy rate of over 76 percent. If so, how come the CIA and FBI agents did not red this guy, Snowden, and that three months after being fully vetted, he was allowed to make a fool of all the lavishly decorated generals and admirals in charge of keeping the most strategic US secrets?
In my opinion body language is no more revealing that words people may utter. I remember that as a fresh immigrant, my internship boss, a good man, told me in a paternalistic way that by not looking to other people faces, I would never get a job, being suspected as a devious person (fortunately it ended well for me; some employers are more interested in making money than respecting well-worn clichés). He was unaware that in some cultures watching one's face is sometimes impolite, because if for example the boss is lying to you (as it happened to me), you will delicately spare him the embarrassment of reading the lies in his eyes and let him hope that he fooled you; analyzing his words is enough to correctly size the situation. Anyway, reading faces is even today to me like intruding into someone privacy and sophisticated cultures try to avoid this. So much for body signals meaning, especially in an increasing multicultural society like ours, where is arrogant to suppose that one standard of behavior constitutes “one size fits all”. To me, other criteria are more objective, like watching (if possible) how people are driving their cars, which speaks volumes about their IQ and how efficient they are. Speaking of body language, I could not understand the gesture of two persons hitting each other’s fists, gesture made popular by Michelle Obama in 2008 and probably signifying “we did it!”, until I watched the old movies with “the three Stooges”; but why in the world The First Lady, a truly smart person, would behave like those mentally challenged personages is still a mystery to me. Maybe she did it to please the biases of stupid crowds who elected Bush president to the most powerful job on earth, on the criterion that he is “the most likeable companion to drink a beer with” (not a valid criteria in light of the disastrous results for this country).
To me, the book ideas go in the wrong direction, in short, appearances shall not prevail over substance. The body language alone does not tell anything about credentials, character, honesty and personal achievements, things which really matters and make a person what he is. In my childhood years, among other sound precepts, I was told that “clothes do not make a person”, meaning that you should judge a person by his intrinsic value not by appearances which are in most cases misleading. Of course I am not speaking about extremes: shabby clothes, negligent hygiene, etc. And betraying words can by more reviling than body language (if body language is reviling at all, which I doubt). For example I have heard engineers discussing a technical problem saying “I believe that…” which to me disqualify them as professionals, because in engineering you either know and are sure of something, or do not (as my school teacher taught us pupils, believing is for use limited only in church, e.g. when someone buys the scam of transubstantiation doctrine for example, otherwise one has to verify anything and judge by himself). A perfect example how appearances are misleading is Tony Blair, for me the prototype of the professional liar with his passionate conviction speeches and flawless body language (according to this book), and most of the politicians for this matter, but if one knows the truth and compare it with what they are saying, it is easy to see them for what they are, liars. Appearances with no substance (Texans would say “all hat and no cattle”) can only fool people who are biased and simple-minded. No body language training will allow someone to be a perfect impostor, sooner or later soon people will find out.
In conclusion, and this is my strictly personal opinion, the book is a complete waste of time, nothing to help the reader in the day-to-day life; I had to stop reading long before I could ended it, and I cannot agree more with its title: “the complete idiot’s guide to ….”. The great Barnum is credited with saying “there’s a sucker born every minute”, and gullible people probably make the bulk of this book’s readers.
March 20, 2024
Colour of clothing. Keep feet planted. Direction of feet.
Using a stage: left side negative, right side position, middle side presentation. Then repeat it when you recap your presentation.
Using a stage: left side negative, right side position, middle side presentation. Then repeat it when you recap your presentation.
April 4, 2025
It is a guide to idiots. Enough said.
October 17, 2014
Meh. Not sure this book is completely reliable. Not much source siting.
Displaying 1 - 4 of 4 reviews