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Paris Was Ours: Thirty-Two Writers Reflect on the City of Light

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Paris is "the world capital of memory and desire," concludes one of the writers in this intimate and insightful collection of memoirs of the city. Living in Paris changed these writers forever.
In thirty-two personal essays-more than half of which are here published for the first time-the writers describe how they were seduced by Paris and then began to see things differently. They came to write, to cook, to find love, to study, to raise children, to escape, or to live the way it's done in French movies; they came from the United States, Canada, and England; from Iran, Iraq, and Cuba; and-a few-from other parts of France. And they stayed, not as tourists, but for a long time; some are still living there. They were outsiders who became insiders, who here share their observations and revelations. Some are well-known writers: Diane Johnson, David Sedaris, Judith Thurman, Joe Queenan, and Edmund White. Others may be lesser known but are no less passionate on the subject.
Together, their reflections add up to an unusually perceptive and multifaceted portrait of a city that is entrancing, at times exasperating, but always fascinating. They remind us that Paris belongs to everyone it has touched, and to each in a different way.

306 pages, Kindle Edition

First published February 8, 2011

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About the author

Penelope Rowlands

9 books13 followers
Penelope Rowlands is a journalist and the author of A Dash of Daring, a critically acclaimed biography of Carmel Snow, the brilliant Irish-American editor-in-chief of Harper's Bazaar (from 1934-1958).

Rowlands has also edited two well-received anthologies, The Beatles Are Here! and Paris Was Ours -- in each case also contributing both the introduction and an essay of her own. She is the author of three books on design, including monographs on Jean Prouvé and Eileen Gray.

She is currently working on a new biography..

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 192 reviews
Profile Image for  ~Geektastic~.
238 reviews162 followers
January 13, 2016
Paris Was Ours is a very enjoyable and fairly informative collection of essays. Like most collections of this type, some were better than others. Unlike most collections of this type, most of them were very, very good.

I was pleasantly surprised by the range of experiences presented: expats not only from America and Britain, but places as varied as Iraq, Iran and Cuba all give us a taste of their Parisian experience. And it’s not just foreigners; there are several essays from natives as well, each with a different view to offer. Nearly all of the contributions were from people who make a living as writers, but only a few of them were "famous," or at least only a few were immediately recognizable to me, namely Diane Johnson (of Le Divorce fame), David Sedaris and Edmund White. Many of the essays shared a certain perception of Paris, but you may be surprised that the over-arching themes were not concerned with the "City of Light" romantic Paris, but the melancholy, mired-in-history Paris that few American writers seem to acknowledge in their dreamy remembrances of Continental self-discovery. There are the requisite mentions of foulards and such surface-level observations, but there are also deeper examinations of Parisian life. I don’t say “French life” because, as many of these essays make clear, living in Paris is not necessarily the same as living anywhere else in France.

One of my particular favorites was “Friends of My Youth,” by Joe Queenan, which captures the rambling essence of the student Year Abroad; the drunkenness, wandering and friendships that only a year of freedom in a foreign land can give. A few others worth noting are Diane Johnson’s “Learning French Ways,” Janine di Giovanni’s “Parenting, French Style,” Zoe Valdes’ “ The Tribulations of a Cuban Girl in Paris,” and Karen Shur’s “Ma Vie Boheme.” Each one has something different to say about Paris, but many of them share common themes: homesickness, the aloof Parisian attitude to outsiders, the idiosyncrasies of French culture, all of which I find fascinating as I’ve never left the East Coast of the U.S.

This collection was entertaining and enlightening, and for $1.99 on my e-reader it was a steal.
Profile Image for janet Burke.
40 reviews3 followers
March 26, 2011
One of my favorite types of books, this is an anthology containing the stories of foreigners who spent a year or more living in Paris. This type of book is a great way to get a feel for what a particular location is like, its people, culture and ethos - in this case, Paris. I came away thinking, for me personally, Paris would be a great place to visit but not a good fit as far as a place to settle down. The Parisian culture seems more foreign in comparison to the American culture than any other of Europe that I have read about or experienced to this point, which makes it particularly intriguing!
Profile Image for Peggy.
817 reviews
May 11, 2020
I have very romantic, very unrealistic ideas about Paris. This book of essays reinforced both senses of the city. It’s beautiful and unfriendly, it rains all the time and it’s still possible to find heavenly baguettes.

What these writers confirmed is that if I go, it should be for at least a year and my French should be pretty fluent before I get there.

Also I should have gone when I was 20 and didn’t care about lumpy mattresses and damp spots on the walls. Now I’m almost 70 and will have to pay through the nose (le nez) for a mediocre apartment. 😅
Profile Image for David.
116 reviews23 followers
April 21, 2011
I love Paris. There's no doubt about it. I dream of living and getting into a routine in the City of Light. When I came across Paris Was Ours in a bookstore, I just had to read it.
The book is comprised of essays from 32 authors. It's an interesting format because it tells stories from distinct perspectives, including that of a homeless blogger. Not all Parisian adventures are romantic - some are pedestrian, some are stressful, and some are downright humiliating. The variety of experiences do share a common theme - Paris is a city that permanently shapes its inhabitants, and as one of the authors said, you might leave Paris, but you'll never get Paris out of your head.
An added bonus to this enjoyable book - I discovered many new authors to follow!
8 reviews
May 15, 2011
Favourite thoughtful passages:

"Strangely enough there is no specific word for "lonely" in the French language: seul, isolé, abandonné, some people even use the word perdu." (Lily Tuck, My Literary Paris, p. 155)

"It really doesn't hurt if you don't know anything about Paris when you arrive, because it's all visibly legible The French mark their houses in a uniform way; they even pile up fruit in a way that makes it legible. They have outfits for each task. Anyone with any sense can see the logic of the street. Their phenomenal ability to organize things and make them legible makes the whole thing somewhat theatrical--and quite memorable." (Richard Armstrong, Montparnasse and Beyond, p. 181)

"There are, in fact, no precise translations, because there are no pure human prisms who refract a text or a speech without distortion. Rendering a word into another language is a mysterious process, and just as the noun "mystery" is religious in origin, so is the verb "to translate." Its first meaning is "to remove the body or relics of a saint or hero from one place of interment or repose to another." Its second meaning is "to carry or convey to heaven without death." That, of course is what one aspires to do when one translates a work of literature; to convey a vital essence that has been buried in the crypt (encrypted) of an alien lexicon, to a place in the light where it can endure." (Judith Thurman, Guillaume à Paris, p. 185-86)

"With age, the dislocations tend to announce themselves less as bracing, extracarbonated mental states than as crippling tornadoes of small details. In part I suppose I dreaded what can only be termed my own devolution. Whereas at home I am organized, competent, and semiarticulate, I am in France awkward and incapable." (Stacy Schiff, In Franklin's Footsteps, p. 217)

"You don't have to be French to smoke a Gitane and notice the falling leaves drifting by your window." (Marcelle Clements, Paris is Gone, All Gone, p. 245)

Favourite humorous passages (most often centered around the translation of French to English):

"The trouble was that I'd moved to Paris completely unprepared... Desperate for material, I was on the verge of buying a series of Learn To Speak English tapes when my sister Amy sent a package containing...my very own copy of "Pocket Medical French," a palm-sized phrase book and corresponding cassette designed for doctors and nurses unfamiliar with the language... I came to see Paris through the jaundiced eyes of the pocket medical guide. Spoken in English and then repeated, slowly and without emotion, in French, the phrases are short enough that I was quickly able to learn such sparkling conversational icebrakers as "Remove your dentures and all of your jewelry" and "Now you need to deliver the afterbirth." Thought I have yet to use any of my new commands and questions, I find that in learning them, I am able to imagine myself Walkman-free and plunging headfirst into an active and rewarding social life. That's me at the glittering party, refilling my champagne glass and turning to ask the host if he's noticed any unusual discharge. "We need to start and IV" I'll say to the countess while boarding her yacht. "But first could I trouble you for a stool sample?" (David Sedaris, The Tapeworm is In, p. 9-71)

"English class was the one relief. The teacher was kind, and was somewhat embarrassed to have a native speaker in the room, but I never corrected her--not even on the day she had us reciting "Negroes have crispy hair." This was the one time we could let our voices go without restraint, and we belted out phrases like war chants: "Grandfather, won't you have grilled kidneys for breakfast?" (Noelle Oxenhandler, La Bourdonneuse, p. 241)
Profile Image for Patty.
2,695 reviews118 followers
March 31, 2020
”Few places can draw in as many diverse souls, then mark them as profoundly as this city – called ‘that siren, Paris’ by the writer Francine du Plessix Gray – seems to do. Ask a Casual tourist what brought him or her there in the first place and he or she is apt to mention style, beauty, savoir vivre, and the like. But for a long-term visitor the picture, of course, more complex, the city’s contradictory nature more clear. To actually live within the confines of the peripherique is to be brought fact-to-face, on a daily basis, with the tough reality beneath the city’s surface appeal.”

Paris is a dream for me. I don’t know if I will get there, but I certainly am willing to read about it. At this moment, I have forty books indexed with Paris as a subject. So when I saw this book on Libby, it looked like it was the right book for me. And it was, even though it took me months to finish.

There are 32 essays in this book. So not surprisingly, there are good and bad ones. The range of people, topics and the parts of Paris is remarkable. There is an essay from a homeless woman, Germans, Americans and even Parisians. There is history, humor and food. Overall, I enjoyed my time in Paris with these people.

If you are looking for an escape from your life, but not travel expertise, you might want to get this book. There is bound to be an essay or two that you enjoy.
Profile Image for Doug.
16 reviews
March 11, 2011
This a relatively short book of articles (blogs?) of individuals who have been resident visitors to Paris over the years. The editor (and author of final arfticle - Penelope Rowalnd) has displayed a clever and interesting selection of writers and observers to reflect their unique experiences having left the USA and taken up residence in Paris. Their commentaries are clever, revealing and well-written. I found the book to be an enjoyable read but a little difficult to classify as it is really a collection of obervations and experiences - some critical, some humorous, but all original.
Profile Image for Elf.
84 reviews
June 17, 2015
For a review, let me give some warnings/information about Paris Was Ours as someone who visits Paris every year:
- If you're looking to get tips about Paris, this isn't the right book for you. Some of the stories go way back and a lot of things from those stories have completely changed over the years.
- If you can't understand the French language, get ready to use an online translator. Hard to understand why they haven't translated all the French parts.
- My favorite part about the book was in most essays (maybe all actually), they don't talk about Paris in the unrealistic way a lot of people talk about. Paris is a gorgeous city with a lot of nice people, but it's not all happy in Paris just like it's not anywhere else, some of the essays do a very good job reminding just that.
- The first essays are pretty slow, be patient, it gets better. :-)
Profile Image for Monika.
201 reviews21 followers
February 5, 2021
I must admit that I really really like anthologies. Previously I had steered clear of them because something snobbish on the inside told me that in order for a book to be truly worthwhile reading, it needed to be conquered and dominated. But anthologies allow for a true enjoyment of reading that is not ambitious.

Of course there were some testimonies I liked less (but these were over soon enough) and others I liked lots - Caroline Weber, Joe Queenan (who provided my favourite line - "a mutton-faced cop stuck his head out the window and told him to cease and desist and get the fuck down"), David Sedaris, Janine De Giovanni, C.K. Williams, Lily Tuck, Richard Armstrong, Noelle Oxenhandler, Marcelle Clements, David Lebovitz -- and yes that is a small selection. The topics were varied but at the same time entirely the same. It seems that Paris' identity and personality is a real and tangible thing.
Profile Image for Haley.
67 reviews1 follower
July 14, 2016
"I knew already that living in Paris would not be like visiting Paris, but I hadn't appreciated what that really meant. My previous trips to France had lasted days or weeks and had been marked by an epiphany at some museum or cathedral and a lot of feel good time at sidewalk cafes or strolls in the long summer twilight. Vacation syndrome is dangerously seductive. You actually believe that this magical place you have come to allows you to be the connected, stress-free person that you really are. There's a lot of vacation syndrome in Paris."

The above quotation, excerpted from Walter Wells' Becoming a Parisian, is one of my favorites from this book and is illustrative of the the over-arching theme captured in many of these essays: that Paris is a hard city. Many of us have dreams of living as ex-pats in Paris, myself included, but this essay collection further cultivated my sense that Paris is a city that doesn't bend or make amends. It won't welcome you with open arms. It's too proud for that. And yet for a city and people so proud, we know that Paris today suffers from issues of security, racism, and a burgeoning immigrant population that is pushed from the the city's cultural heart to the rundown and overcrowded suburbs. It takes a special person to want to live in Paris as an outsider. Not only must you want it enough to accept Parisians and French ways, you must be willing to accept its contradictions, whose significance is here heightened because they are what we least expected to find in the city of light.

I have been to Paris twice. My first memory of Paris is not actually of the city itself but of a fleeting vision I had as a fifteen year old just landed at Charles de Gualle, being conveyed away by bus via a dull highway that seemed to highlight only the poor and trash-ridden immigrant neighborhoods surrounding the city. It was a cold, gray day in late March, much akin to the colorless Parisian winter months described by some of the authors in the book. At last, peeking through the clouds I caught a glimpse of the Eiffel Tower; I felt the tinge of excitement that had brought me to Paris as I joined my classmates in the scramble to take low-quality photos of an image that was already fading from view. So Paris was wonderful after all. Even so, it was a sad first encounter. I felt sad for the contradictions of everything I thought I knew about Paris, sad for the people living those contradictions, and sad mostly because I was being conveyed away from it all - this wonderful, perplexing city.

Paris is a good place to fall in love, but it is also a good place to be lonely, as many of the writers here stress. Paris may be a good place to be a woman of color, as Josephine Baker and later Janet Macdonald, as she recounts here in her essay titled Just Another American, discovered for themselves, but it is also a place where in light of France's colonial legacy and recent world events you are scrutinized by your cultural practices. It is a fun and flirtatious place to be a young woman, but also a place whose culture precipitates conflicting expectations about how women should act. Two of my favorite essays were about young women who sought through Paris to discover their confidence, but whose conclusions are far from the stuff of feel-good travel memoirs, instead showing them as failures in their endeavor, confused.

All of this in more was put into my head while reading this book, and all of these stories gave layers to a city that, like the Eiffel Tower I saw peeking through the clouds on that gray March day, is shrouded in myth and expectation. The truth of this book is that the reality of a city doesn't truly exist. We all live it differently. But perhaps the essence of it is to be found somewhere in between.

I agree that some of these essays are outdated but still worth reading. And no, I haven't found Parisians to be as snobby and unyielding as they are often portrayed here.

Bonne Lecture!

H.
Profile Image for MusicalMommy.
51 reviews
October 19, 2011
This is a collection of essays, memories about Paris. The beginning stories were non-descript and downright boring. The middle stories were better. The best stories were towards the end. I only read to the end because I don't like to leave a book unfinished. I persevered to finish it. But, I wonder how many people make it past the first three chapters? I was reading from an ebook format so I didn't realize until the end that there is a short blurb about every writer who contributed at the back of the book. It would have been helpful if I had read the blurbs about each author before reading his/her essay. It would have made the writing more meaningful. I hadn't heard of a single one of the authors before. This book wouldn't be interesting for anyone who has not been to the city. It only connected with me because I recognized some of the historical places, street names, districts; seen some of the same behaviour in Parisens myself.
Profile Image for David Gray.
Author 6 books9 followers
November 3, 2011
This is a collection of short pieces in or about living in Paris. There was a line in the introduction that kinds of turned me off that somehow implied that your experience of Paris was pretty much irrelevant if you didn't "live" there...which turned me off. But of the 34 difference writers, there were some wonderful pieces. Though it seems women either in college or fresh out of college seem to be featured (though it began to feel a little repetitive... yes, we get it, every woman is quickly seduced by the scarf thing and slowly seduced by some frenchman that she really knows she probably shouldn't be involved with....).

But having visited Paris in April I enjoyed reading this as it brought the vacation back to mind. If you consume everyhting having to do with Paris, then read this... otherwise... maybe not...
Profile Image for Emma.
34 reviews1 follower
April 25, 2011
As with most collections there were stories in this that I enjoyed and others that I did not. That being said I think the collection is a fairly good representation of the joys and trials that come with living in Paris.

Most people will probably think that this will be a glowing depiction of the city and written mainly for people who already have an obsessive love of the city (even if they haven't lived there or been there). Paris Was Ours is more of an honest account from different writers and their experiences of the city. Some focus on the city itself, while others focus on their own lives and just happen to be in Paris.

Overall, this collection is worth a look if you're a reader interested in Parisian life.
Profile Image for Jaylia3.
752 reviews151 followers
September 7, 2011
Since Paris has been a center of culture for so long I was drawn to this book, and after reading these thirty two mostly fascinating and insightful essays about the joys and irritations of living in The City of Light I was not disappointed. The authors are contemporary, but their lives in Paris span decades. Most are British or American so give a sort of English-language cultural perspective, which can’t help but be interesting to someone like me who is a member of that tribe, but other essayists come from around the globe. I especially enjoyed the essays by an Iranian woman, who lived in Paris as a young woman shortly after her country’s 1979 revolution, and a Cuban woman, who had been led to believe that living in Paris would be a punishment.
Profile Image for Sally Smith.
245 reviews2 followers
July 10, 2013
This book surprised me. I was expecting nice, little vignettes on Paris, but the depth of the writing and the wide variety of writer ethnicities made this book much more than that, from the wife of a Cuban diplomat who fainted upon seeing and smelling roast chicken, which she hadn't had since she was ten years old in Cuba, to the African-American woman who swore she wasn't American, just black, but was assured by Parisians that was sooo American, one really gets a varied view of all things Paris. I highly recommend this book.
Profile Image for Nancy.
286 reviews3 followers
February 22, 2011
I LOVED this book. A wonderful compilation of short stories by writers from many countries sharing their experiences of "The City of Light". It's like taking a trip there and much more.
Profile Image for Chloe.
228 reviews16 followers
January 13, 2013
I'm holding on to this collection of essays as a reference for when my husband and I inevitably work out a way to live for awhile in Paris.
Profile Image for Kelsey Bugler.
37 reviews
July 30, 2016
Well now I'd like to book a flight to Paris.

My favorite essay was, "Friends of My Youth" by Joe Queenan.
Profile Image for Alarie.
Author 13 books90 followers
December 27, 2018
Thirty-two writers reflect on their time living in Paris and how it changed them. No matter how many times I see writers respond to the same prompt, I’m always surprised by how different the results are. These essays (except for one poet C. K. Williams who responded with poems) were freshly individual. The greatest similarities were from those who were poor college students living in strange flats and eating sad, but cheap food in the culinary capital of the world. Many were there to research a book or for their professions, so the type of work, whether they had children with them, all sorts of factors changed how they looked at the experience. For a Francophile who has been to Paris many times, like myself, it was a great pleasure to read about places I have been. Several times I’ve gone to Shakespeare and Company to buy French novels in English (Balzac, Zola) to read during my visit and on the plane home, so “My Bookstore High” by Jeremy Mercer, about his experience working there was especially fun; and, of course, David Sedaris, always shows us the amusing side of things.
25 reviews
July 12, 2021
I so enjoyed this book and the short stories. Having been to Paris multiple times, I can so relate to the experiences the authors went through with the city itself or the French people. I always would say I so love France if it weren’t for the French, but I see through these stories that I was treated no better or worse than anyone else. But you still fall in love with the city and its architecture, its walkability, its intimacy, its beauty.

There were only two stories I did not care for, but I won’t tell you which as you might like them. One story I could not read as it did not pull me in at all and another story I notated to myself that the writing (not the story) was “convoluted, too bouncy back and forth, no stream, no rhyme or reason”.

I could relate to a lot in all of the other stories, at times shaking my head in agreement or outright laughing (as in “that happened to me, too”.)

I am handing it next to my husband to read. He is from Belgium, but speaks French, and will tell you being non-French, but speaking French, does not get you far in Paris.
251 reviews9 followers
April 21, 2020
In a normal world, I would have been in Paris this week, unfortunately Instead I'm home and in the house. Fortunately, I have a lot of books. Many about Paris. I chose Paris Was Ours because it is a book of short stories and although I don't read a lot of short stories I do enjoy them when the subject is about something I love. These stories by many different authors we're wonderful and very diversified so I got a lovely sense of Paris than I would have even if I had been there. Some went for a week's vacation, others went to school there and some lived there for many years. I learned new words, got a literary your, drawled over croissants and chocolates and had cafe creme in some lovely cafes. Books, music, and museums we're offered. So many underlined notes. In the end, I was satisfied with not being there right now because I have now made a wonderful list for when I can get there again, hopefully within the next year.
Profile Image for Amanda Hernandez.
25 reviews
November 8, 2018
I found this book a bit underwhelming. It’s hard to pinpoint exactly why but I think it may be because I have never actually been to Paris. I couldn't relate to what many of the authors were talking about. I also felt as if there was this continual tone throughout the book which I did not like. I was hoping each story would be entirely different from the next but the authors didn't really seem to have drastically various writing styles - maybe they were over-edited by Rowlands. But, overall, I did appreciate the book and feel like I have been given a better look at Paris from an outsider's perspective which is great! I would recommend this book to people who have actually traveled to or lived in Paris instead of people like me who, at this point, only have dreams of going to Paris. I think they may find nostalgia and relatable moments within the pages.
37 reviews
September 7, 2025
I kinda wish this book got a redo. Because some of the 32 authors short memoirs were interesting, memorable, and informative. But a lot of the entries were just very ok. Forgettable but not all together terrible to read.

This book could have been infinitely more interesting if the author had been more selective and had a higher bench mark for whose essays she would include in the collection. When I got to David Sedaris' entry, I was like, "Ok this is more like it". I finished the book hungry for more Sedaris level writing after feeling malnourished from all the mediocre entries.

All that being said, I liked the book overall. Each author's insights on Parisian culture were practical and I feel better culturally equipped for my next trip to France.
Profile Image for Christine Mathieu.
600 reviews91 followers
September 25, 2022
Reading this wonderful book made me homesick for Paris, even though I've visited the city of light 10 times between 1972 and 2017.
In ca. 20 chapters/short stories different (mostly American) authors tell their Paris story.
Most of them were young when they spent a year or two or more in Paris.
Many of the stories take place in the 1980's and 1990's, a few are newer. The book is from 2011.

I usually don't care for short stories, but this one was very rewarding.

For further Paris reading I can highly recommend "We always had Paris...and Provence" by Patricia and Walter Wells and Julia Childs' book on her years in Paris.
Profile Image for Alexi Ssss.
17 reviews
November 18, 2019
(Really 3.5 stars) Of course, some stories are better than others. However, Penelope Rowlands did a wonderful job editing this collection. There is a very diverse array of writers (different nationalities, ethnicities, socio-economic status, etc.) resulting in vastly differing experiences of Paris. I have to admit I was hesitant when I picked up this book, as I was expecting essays by pretentious, entitled, white recent grads seeking to “find themselves” in Paris (somewhat like the introduction - sorry Penelope) and of course there is some of that but overall this collection provides a realistic, intriguing portrait of Paris from the perspectives of people from diverse walks of life.
24 reviews1 follower
February 28, 2023
"Paris was Ours" is an anthology of essays by people who have moved to Paris from elsewhere. Most, but not all, are Americans.
Since Americans moving to Paris is a subject dear to my heart I enjoyed this though, as with all collections like this, some of the essays are better than others. What I like, you may not since some of the authors will have more in common with me than they do with others whose experiences with the city differ from mine. But there should be something here that will strike a chord for anyone who loves Paris.
25 reviews
May 19, 2025
Paris Was Ours, edited by Penelope Rowlands, is a collection of 32 essays by writers from various backgrounds, each sharing personal reflections on life in Paris. The anthology presents a layered view of the city, touching on both its charm and its difficulties. While the experiences vary, the collection offers insight into how Paris can shape and influence those who live there, even briefly. It may appeal to readers who enjoy reflective, place-based writing and diverse perspectives on one of the world’s most iconic cities.
Profile Image for Kevin Christiansen.
283 reviews3 followers
January 28, 2023
While I enjoyed some of the stories, after a while the book felt a bit repetitive. I would have enjoyed a few more stories from a more diverse group of writers. The book seemed to be heavy on those who've spent a lot of time in New York before going to Paris, were educated at an Ivy League school, or had a writing background in fashion. This wasn't the case for every story, but it felt heavy on writers with one or more of those backgrounds.
Profile Image for Abby Gray.
93 reviews1 follower
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April 30, 2024
This has been my go-to coffee shop read for the last… year and a half, I suppose. Open it up, read a few pages, then get to work writing or whatever else.

Great collection of essays by an eclectic bunch of writers who all have one thing in common: they’ve lived in Paris at some point in their lives, and hated and loved it in turn. I especially liked Marcelle Clements’ essay towards the end about the specific feelings that the city invokes: “Paris’s beauty is of the heartbreaking kind.”
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