Surviving Columbine: How Faith Helps Us Find Peace When Tragedy Strikes

by Liz Carlston

Three students who survived the shootings at Columbine High School describe their experiences and relate how their Mormon faith helped them to cope with the aftermath of the shootings and find inner peace.

Genres: Nonfiction, History, Religion, True Crime, Crime

126 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 2004

Reviews

[Tanya Wadley · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a great book with powerful emotional impact (5 stars for emotional impact and message/ 4 stars for writing). I was reading it while substitute teaching (while the students completed their assigned work). I had to put it away because it was too emotional... especially in that setting.

It was interesting to see the different people who shared their experiences and how they had to deal with the post traumatic stress. It was nice to see them succeed since these kinds of traumas can cripple some people mentally and emotionally for life. I liked Amber's sentiments about needing to WORK through difficulties... and not just expecting them to go away over time. There are certainly some people stuck in a time warp and their world revolves around the worst people and experiences of life.

I liked the analogy Amber used of using trials as stepping stones to becoming better instead of carrying the burdens with us. I also liked the expression that courage is not the absence of fear, but the realization that something else is more important.

I also liked the idea that our individual stories of adversity are a guide away from anger, guilt, fear, and doubt to those suffering. I have found this to be very true... our adversities serve to strengthen us and know how to better help others who are suffering and in need of strengthening.

In some way we all have a certain amount of post traumatic stress to deal with, albeit much milder, as a witness to these events even on the news. I remember having bad dreams at night and in the day after a local killing spree at Trolley Square (which killed the wife of one of my husband's friends). Prayer and thought helped bring a very peaceful mental/emotional resolution for me... my strong faith that God is aware of us and has His purposes for us (some to stay here and some to leave this world, sometimes as victims of tragedy and hate). Believing that we will not be taken until our intended work on earth is complete gives me the confidence to be part of this world we live in and not excessively fear.

This is a touching treatment of the tragedy written mainly for an LDS audience (members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints). It could be uplifting to others as well.

I heard the author speak in a church meeting. She shared some very interesting stories. After reading a little bit about her, I thing it's great that she chose to donate her proceeds from the book to help others. I'm sure there will be something positive to take from this book.

Keeper Quotes:
"As I look back now at being shot, I realize something about life. The most difficult aspect of remaining happy during hardships is having an eternal perspective-- remembering there is something beyond the veil, something more than this moment of our existence." Michael Johnson (I think if everyone could know/believe this, the "tragedies" of life would not be so burdensome... people would not question the existence of God so much if they could "see" the victims of poverty, famine, natural disaster, and violence returning to His loving arms at death... walking the "bridge" from this existence into the next).

"The older you get, the more you'll know that a great deal of life is the struggle against every person's own smallness and fear and anger-- and a continuing effort not to blame other people for our own shortcomings or our fears." President Clinton

[Nelson] Mandela served a prison sentence lasting more than 27 years, laboriously breaking rocks every day. He was separated from his wife and children and was physically and emotionally abused. President Clinton said that he had asked Nelson Mandela, "How did you let go of your hatred?" In response Mandela said, "One day I was breaking rocks, and I realized they had taken so much. And they could take everything from me except my mind and my heart. Those things I would have to give away. I decided not to give them away." POWERFUL!

[Heather Anderson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Obviously not award winning authors, but very interesting to read about their different situations during Columbine and to hear their struggles afterwards. There were times during the book that I felt I was with them, holding their hands trying to stay alive, and other times when I felt the anxiety of one of the girls, dealing with PTSD. I can't imagine going through this kind of event and it not being life altering in one way or another. Overall a good, quick read.

[Abby · Rating 3 out of 5]

I just stumbled across this book at the library and thought it looked interesting enough to read. It's four different perspectives of people involved with the Columbine High shooting - a boy who was shot twice outside and escaped to a tool shed to survive; that boy's mom; a girl on the basketball team whose coach was killed and whose sister was in the same classroom for several hours while he died; and a girl who hid under a table in the library and escaped the notice of the shooters. I remember Columbine really well, because it happened when I was a senior in high school, too. I was a teacher's aid in one of my classes, and while alone I pulled up a random class roll and counted down how many students had been killed (I already forgot how many - like 12, 15?) and imagined that those first dozen students on the roll in front of me were the ones who were randomly killed if it had happened at my school. It spooked me more than a little bit.

All four authors in the book are LDS, but I don't remember them ever specifically explaining that to the reader. They mentioned seminary, missions, firesides, Bishops, etc, and I couldn't help but think a non-LDS reader would be confused. It really would have been a good idea to add in a description of what all these Mormon terms were, but oh well. I knew what they were talking about.

Out of the whole book, one thing stood out that totally bugged me: President Clinton came and visited Columbine High School and talked to the students. The author never came out and said anything bad about him, but she dropped a couple hints. For example, she mentioned that her sister refused to go and be part of a "photo op" for the president. When he came into the auditorium the students started cheering for him and and hooted and hollered like teenagers would for an important visitor. President Clinton listened to their cheers and then said, "Do that one more time," which of course they did. I read that like, ten times, thinking I must be misunderstanding something. Coming as their president to comfort these traumatized teenagers, President Clinton enjoyed their cheering for him so much that he asked them to do it again for him? Are you kidding me? If that is really true, it coincides with what I've heard about Bill Clinton and his enormous ego, and it makes me want to barf on his shoes. He asked the students to cheer for him again like it was a freaking pep rally?! Oi. Then afterwards, when everyone was exhausted and wanted to leave (it had been another rough day) they locked everyone in the auditorium for another hour to ensure that the teenagers didn't rush the president's helicopter. Fine, whatever. I was bugged.

It was a nice little book about moving past tragedies and dealing with things like PTSD, but nothing earthshattering. It made me interested in learning more about the shooters again, because I don't remember exactly what their motives were or what their psyhotic behavior stemmed from. I know that's morbid. But it really is interesting to learn how the brain works and why people do what they do, including horrible things like this.

PS. I finished writing this review and then googled the timeline of what happened at Columbine High that day and read more about the two teenage shooters. So never mind, I take back what I said about morbidly wanting to know what was going on in their heads or why they did what they did. I watched video footage from the security cameras of them setting off bombs and shooting, and really...now I wish I had just stuck with this book, which was smart enough to tell the story of what happened but not make you feel the evil awfulness of what happened to your very core.

I think about my army wive's husbands who deal with PTSD and surivor guilt from serving in Afghanistan, and I realize that while life goes on after witnessing something horrible, life can never be the same. Now I'm sad and feel less safe. I wish I had just read the book, and skipped the gory details. Learn from me. Just read the book and leave it at that. :-(

I wanted to go straight to bed, and now I have to read something happy first. Dang it.

[Cortney · Rating 3 out of 5]

After reading Columbine by Dave Cullen, I remembered hearing an interview with young LDS authors who had written about their experiences surrounding the Columbine tragedy. So I dug around and found that this was the book.
It was a decent book. I would give it five stars for perspective. The book was written by four different authors, each telling of their experiences and how they came through the tragedy.

Liz Carlston- a junior at the time of the tragedy. She did not witness any of the shooting. She was in trigonometry when she heard the fire alarm go off and was directed to leave the school. Once outside, she and other students were directed away from the school. She was very confused as to what was going on. Rumors were flying. She worried for hours until she found her younger sister (who happened to be in a science classroom where Liz's basketball coach died). While she didn't witness the shootings, she still felt a huge emotional impact.

Amber Huntington- a senior at the time of the tragedy. She was in the library where most of the murders occurred. She felt the Holy Spirit witness to her that she would not die that day. For obvious reasons, she had a very difficult time with life afterward.

Michael Johnson- one of the first students shot. While his physical injuries were difficult to heal from, he was blessed emotionally in not remembering much of the day.

Kathy Johnson- Michael's mother. It was good to get a parent's perspective in all of this. As a parent, when I read about tragedies such as this, I find myself wondering about my own children, my own reactions, etc.

So, for giving varied perspective- five stars.

The writing was pretty weak, so the book got knocked down to three stars.

The survivors of this tragedy are amazing. They went through an absolutely horrific day and came through bearing witness of the Lord and his healing power.

[Sally · Rating 3 out of 5]

I wish I could give this book 3.5 stars - somewhere in between like it and really like it. The writing style was a bit amateurish, but considering it is a compilation of memories from REAL people who experienced the shooting tragedy at Columbine, it is forgivable. These first person accounts were at times difficult to read as you imagined the events that took place right before their eyes. However, the insights toward the end of the book were often poignant and touching.

[Wendy · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a simply written book narrated by 3 former Columbine LDS students, as well as one of their parents. They each share their story, what they learned, and how they overcame the unimaginable personal struggles, and how their faith helped their hearts to heal. I found this book to be enormously helpful to me. There were some real nuggets of wisdom shared by some very young people forced to grow up too quickly. A worthwhile read that can be completed in an afternoon.

[Sandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was fascinating reading a first-person account of such a tragedy. We all assume that the people who undergo such trials will be affected, but I don't think we realize in what ways. It was very interesting reading about the aftermath--what she had to do to overcome her fears. It definitely goes to show that what happens to you doesn't prevent you from recovering.

[Katie Drake · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is wonderful. It follows the story of three LDS students trapped in the middle of the Columbine masacre. The author was a student during this time and told a very candid account of her life before, during, and after the tragedy. It helped me understand how when bad things happen it's ok to freak out a little bit. But ultimately if you put your faith in Christ he will heal your soul.

[Nikki · Rating 4 out of 5]

I couldn't put down this touching story of five people who survived the Columbine attack in 1999. Although a violent and tragic event, the survivors all spoke of hope and peace and healing. I hope my kids are never face to face with these kind of circumstances, but this book strengthened my faith that they will be able to conquer the unique challenges they will face in life.

[Rayni · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this was an interesting look at Columbine ... the personal reaactions of three participant/victims - and especially how they have come away all the stronger for the experience. The two boys that did this are also victims.

[Shaina]

This was a good book of personal accounts of this tragedy and how they dealt with it. But I had nightmares after reading it so I try not to read books like this. If you can handle reading these kinds of things...it's excellant how they dealt with it.

[Teresa mcgaha · Rating 4 out of 5]

Since rachel challenge. Came to my kids school. My son has been doing a lot of research on this subject. This book told the story from three students and a parent. It. Told of their pain, guilt and there journey after.

[Becky · Rating 5 out of 5]

so grateful that Heavenly Father led me to this book and prompted me to read it. some of what i read touched me too personally, too deeply, to be able to express in words right now for others to understand. "you had to be there"

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

A wonderful and inspiring book. Instead if looking at all of the horrible things that took place during this tragedy it looks at the positive things that came from it. Yes there was suffering but there was peace as well. So glad this was written.

[Bethany · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was written in the words of some of those who survived the Columbine shooting. It was really interesting to read real accounts of what happened that day. What a terrifying experience.

[Ryan Reeves · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kind of a tough read, but very inspirational as well! Gives an insider's view of the Columbine tragedy.

[Vanessa · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved how this book is told from different people. I liked their experiences during the Columbine tragedy AND how to survive afterwards.

[Pili · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a very good but emotional book.

[Holly · Rating 3 out of 5]

LDS students recount the day of the columbine shootings. Very sad.

[Angie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an excellent book about the afermath of Columbine. It was very touching and inspiring.

[Liz Carlston · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was a pleasure to write and I love hearing everyone's feedback.

[Jane · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love the stories filled with faith and perseverance in the face of trials. It just needed a better editor.