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In His Secret Life

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Allan has always tried to do the sensible thing. So when his sister Elsie became pregnant eight years ago and then ditched by her boyfriend, he stepped up to the plate. Since then, he's been his sister's support system and father figure to his niece.

Allan's world is turned upside down when Elsie becomes engaged, and he meets her fiancé's older brother, Davinder -- a beautiful, brooding artist with a thousand secrets breathing in his eyes. But Davinder is a married man and father of two young boys.

From the moment they meet, and for over four decades, Allan and Davinder will walk along the edge of their secret lives, never allowed to push open the gates. And though their love is a head-on collision, a meeting of the minds, a fusing of two lost souls, both men know that it is also, and above all ... impossible.

224 pages, Paperback

First published May 14, 2013

15 people are currently reading
517 people want to read

About the author

Mel Bossa

31 books219 followers


I think I've written and changed my bio on here a hundred times in the last decade. See, that's why I don't have tattoos!

I've been a GR for over ten years and I still use it daily to keep up with my reading and to learn about books, old and new ones, but more importantly, because as I grow older and hopefully wiser, I realize that readers are my favorite type of people. They seem to be a little more empathetic and open-minded, and generally more cultivated.

If you look at my shelves, you'll see that I used to read about 70 books a year but in the last years, I've grown more selective and take my time with my lovers, ahem, books.

Yes, I am also a LGBTQ writer and Francophone Montrealer.

I cherish my readers, and want to take this space here to thank you all personally for reading and reviewing my books. You make reality tolerable like a good class of wine.

May your life be blessed.



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Displaying 1 - 30 of 63 reviews
Profile Image for Jerecho.
396 reviews51 followers
February 4, 2020
It's an amazing story of love, friendship, family, and sacrifice that endure the test of time. Life and love is never been perfect but with the right one it is amazing.

The ending was superb. I can't think of an alternative ending with this one.

4stars for the amazing love with an irritating 10 years of torture to oneself. 😊😅
Profile Image for Karla.
1,454 reviews367 followers
May 6, 2020
****4.5 stars****

What an emotional story! It’s been a while since a book has made my heart squeeze with so much angst but dammit I loved every bit of it. This story was just so real, and raw frustrating at times too but, oh so many feels! I guess I went into over feels because there were some things that were unfair and did piss me off! But in a way I appreciate the journey even more the pain, the love, the loss, the sacrifice, all of it and that ending! Wow!

**Jan shot out to you! For putting this one in my radar. This one hit the spot. **
Profile Image for Jan.
1,254 reviews989 followers
February 18, 2021
Chatting about this book with a friend, I realized that I wrote "prologue" instead of "epilogue" in my review. 🙊🙉🙈 Fixing it now, sorry for the spam. 😖



My kind of drama,
my sort of angst,
my favourite type of story.
It mirrors real life, and it hurts.



Mel Bossa crafted perfect flawed characters and created a compelling storyline making me feel like a pretzel, twisted in anguish.
So many feelings, so moving, so heartfelt.



It spanned over many years, and I just wish it would have been more detailed. Perhaps an extra 200 pages?



That said, there is this voice whispering to me that maybe...,

maybe all the things she hasn't told us, and therefore creating a mystery looming over the story, are precisely the beauty of In His Secret Life



Yes, I had one or two niggles, but I'm overlooking 'em because this is a story that I won't forget any time soon.

I'm not sure what to say about the Epilogue, other than using this quote:

Profile Image for Nazanin.
1,283 reviews837 followers
May 10, 2020
3.5 My Half, My Heart, My Soul Stars

Allan wasn’t the type to be alone and he hadn’t shared his life with another man over two years. He was desperate. It was time for him to opening up to people and meeting them. He just had one and only rule; never ever fall for a straight man. So in the first get-together with his sister’s husband’s family as a new family, he was finally fascinated by the other man (after almost two years). But that man has a wife and children. Yeah, when the heart is going to listen to the brain….

This was my first read by this author and it was a good one but in my opinion, it could be better. I don’t know where their love comes from, I don’t know when they fell in love, it was a bit too insta attraction/love. For me it was like they were in love from the start and it left me a bit confused. Allan was desperate not to be alone but most of the times, he was alone! Another thing was I really needed Dav’s POV. I was desperate to read about his guilt at those times and I would like to know how he ammended the bridges with his family. I wanted to read about his feeling through his own eyes. And how can I talk about that ending! Yes, it was a HEA but a bittersweet one. Now after hours finishing this book still when I think about it my heart aches… Told in single POV, 1st person, it’s a standalone novel. It’s angsty and emotional. Overall, I liked it and hope you enjoy it as well!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for E.
415 reviews130 followers
May 18, 2013
Intense. Inexorable. Tough. Fiery. Those are all adjectives I'd use to describe this book. I didn't cry but I did shake my head a lot and at times my jaw dropped, especially at the end.

The writing is superb. I didn't love the characters but I did feel every excruciating emotion that they felt.

Not recommended to people that want warm and fluffy. Reccomended to anyone that loves a great story.
Profile Image for Mare SLiTsReaD Reviews.
1,215 reviews66 followers
November 26, 2013
4 IS MY HEART STILL BEATING? STARS

It has been confirmed, I am a ANGST JUNKIE. If I have the option between self inflicted torture and pain vs sleep I choose option A EACH AND EVERY TIME!

Why sleep when my heart can bleed every time Davinder touched Allan’s forehead with his? my heart could weep a little bit more…

Why sleep when 2 people who love each other hurt and rip each other apart on every other page?

Sleep is severely overrated.

This book made me question so many things! Every other page made me wonder, question, seek motives, seek solutions, absolution, solace.

It made me question, is cheating right???? Hell’s to the NO I know this BUT I still freaking questioned it! I did, I really truly did.

Can you stop a collision that is bound to happen? Head on? Can you??? Can you stop love?? Is love real? How do you know its love? How can you distinguish between love VS possession, obsession and control? How do you know ITS REAL?????

How can your heart hurt, and shatter and crumble for 224 pages? How?

Cause it can, I can attest! I lived it for 18 hours. 18 hours of my life I spent in despair, with glimpses of hope, of love, of happiness. GLIMPSES! ONLY GLIMPSES!

“I’ll be fine Davinder. I’m happy we had tonight, it was wonderful.”

“Please don’t say it like that. It sounds so tragic.”

“Yah I know.”


4 decades of a love story DENIED! Denied by many. Denied by choices, right, wrong, should I stay, should I go. Him and him, and family, and marriage vows and children. Choices made out of fear, out of desire, out of love.

Is the testament all is fair in love and war true??? This book will make you question EVERYTHING.

“Everything that happened, happened for a reason, and even in my darkest hours, I believed it. I needed to go through those years alone. I had to touch the bottom to kick back up.” Davinder

“We’ve all got our path to travel, and I’ve traveled down mine alone for a long time. What I mean is, you’ve got so much ahead of you, and if you choose to survive your past, no matter how much hurt is buried there, you can break free.” Allan


And after 10 years of being separate and alone on a path to no where, they will come to be again. ‘

“No, our story couldn’t be written. It had only just begun.”

Was it a HEA? YES.

Did I die a little bit on page 224? YES.

Mel Bossa~ I probably could have lived without that epilogue. But this angst junkie thanks you from the bottom of her heart for the knife that you stuck in there! Page 224 killed me slowly.

I travelled through 4 decades with a cast of characters that will stay with me for a really long time

Mare~Slitsread
Profile Image for Izengabe.
276 reviews
May 4, 2020
Relectura el 04 May 2020
He tenido las mismas impresiones que cuando lo leí por primera vez, sigue habiendo muchas cosas que no me convencen pero me ha hecho sentir, y últimamente con el romance ni siento ni padezco, así que más libros así, por favor!

**********
Me rindo a la evidencia, tengo un cuernos-kink muy serio xD Y es que los amores ilícitos son mi kriptonita, lo que puedo gozar... Si conocen de algún libro con el componente "Uy que nos pillan" soy toda oídos.
Este me ha gustado mucho. A pesar de que hay algunas cosas que para mí fallan y otras que me han resultado un tanto WTF, es una lectura que, en definitiva, me ha tenido enganchada y me ha hecho disfrutar mucho.
Mel Bossa escribe muy bien y sabe construir buenos personajes. Allan y Davinder me han caído mal y me han fascinado a partes iguales. Sobre todo Davinder, a ratos me parecía medio gilipollas y a ratos... Quién es ese hombreeeee... *se desmaya* Pero creo que era la intención de la autora presentarlo así, un tanto cretinillo pretencioso.
Un MM muy bien escrito y que se sale de lo acostumbrado y además ambientado en Montreal, lo cual es un plus. ¿Lo recomiendo? Pues no, no creo que sea para todo el mundo y tengo mis reparos sobre algunas cosas (los cuernos no son una de ellas, LOL) pero lo cierto es que me ha gustado mucho.
Profile Image for vLadimiR.
163 reviews17 followers
October 31, 2013

Kindly turn back now if cheating is a subject matter that offends you.

As for me, the topic of infidelity couldn't stop me from raving. The blurb definitely had me from the start.

Awsome Factor #1 Great writing

Straight forward, real and painfully honest. The style of writing in this book is what I like the best. I mean, I could imagine overhearing two real people talking the way the characters did in this story. Each dialogue was simple yet distinct which really gave me an insight to each character's personality because I could easily distinguish their voices from one another. Davinder was the best example of this because in emotional moments, he struggled with what he wanted to say as if expressing his feelings in words just made it more confusing (I know I can relate to that). This definitely made the story more fluid and a page turner. I also loved that the last sentence in every chapter was so melancholic that is seemed like I've reached the end of the book. It was so heartbreaking to read

Awsome Factor #2 No Stereotypes

I think what sets this story apart from other books is the way it handled character relationships. It was honest in highlighting the flaws between siblings, partners and even parents. Everyone had their selfish reasons; No one had the moral high ground and no one, not even Davinder's wife, was painted as the antagonist. Even the children here weren't all that adorable. They threw tantrums and were very much like real children are who can be difficult and self-involved at times.

Awsome Factor #3 Plot

Some may avoid this book like the plague but it really just captivated me with the way it portrayed the pinnacle of forbidden love. The story was able to focus on the harsh reality that people cheat out of selfishness even if they're aware of the consequences it will bring. But having it told in the eyes of the person committing the affair allowed me to understand the reason behind it. Allan and Davinder knew what they were doing was wrong and they didn't try to justify or defend it, but they wanted to be Happy instead of being Right. It's so easy to judge that from an outsider's perspective but how many times have we all done the selfish thing because we're so tired of being lonely or putting other people's welfare over ours? I don't condone what the main characters did but I could definitely understand their reason.

Awsome Factor #4 Character Names

Allan Waterhouse, Davinder Lamontagne, Dayton, Dali, Elsie, Fay, Vassilios? I mean, how creative are these names? The character sketches were wonderfully written but these names just made them all the more memorable to me.


This book definitely hit the right notes for me. Although I was a bit disappointed with the ending , the writing more than made up for it. I'll definitely be looking out for more works from this author.

Profile Image for Jess Brady.
Author 1 book166 followers
May 19, 2020
HEADS UP!! If cheating is a topic that bothers you or is a trigger don't read this book.

For the entirety of this book I was an emotional wreck, I can't even lie about that. There were so many ups and downs for Allen but even more for Allen and Davinder. I got attached to both characters and while I know cheating is a NO NO for a lot of people, I do not mind it so much in books like this. This was not a secret affair to get your rocks off this was a love affair for the ages. This follows Allen and Davinder through a large part of their life while they try to do the right thing and sometimes slip, they both know the pain they are causing. This book hit me in all my feels...

I did sob like a child through the epilogue and while I had an inkling of where it was going, I thought I was more prepared, but I wasn't. If all of Mel Bossa's books are this deep and powerful I really need to read more of stories and dive in immediately.
Profile Image for WhimsicalWords.
186 reviews
January 19, 2021
I guess I have an unpopular opinion here. I wasn't sure what to rate this one. The writing was good, but honestly I really didn't want the two MCs to end up together.
Davinder was horrible. I didn't like how he strung Allen along all that time, and I didn't believe for a second that he had actually planned to leave his wife. If Allen hadn't broke things off, I don't believe he would have ever left his wife! It took him five years even after Allen left. He seemed like a big, selfish coward to me. Claiming that he was scared he'd lose his kids, but I didn't believe that either. He wanted to have both relationships for himself and didn't give a crap about Allen or Eileen. Not deep down, anyway. Not in any way that mattered.
I also never felt this great love that these two supposedly had going. Like, why were they in love? They shared a few interests in books and such. That was basically all they talked about that first day and they were ready to run off together. Why??
I was super mad when after Allen broke up with him and he finally got divorced, Davinder ran straight to his old lover? Umm, okay. So, after he has yet another love affair with this other dude, THEN he goes back and tries to fix things with the family he destroyed.
I was pretty annoyed with the fact that everyone blamed Allen for that destruction, too and not Davinder. Even Davinder was mad at Allen! He basically said everything was his fault because he left him when he'd promised a few more months so Davinder could leave his wife. It had already been a year, dude. It took five more after that for you to grow a pair and divorce her. That really p*ssed me off. I don't know. This just wasn't really a romance to me and I was too frustrated to enjoy any part of this book.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
Profile Image for Tia.
142 reviews14 followers
May 1, 2020
This was a moving love story about Allan, a single, gay man who helps provide for his sister Elsie and her daughter by giving them a floor of his house. When Elsie meets the man of her dreams and gets engaged, Allan meets her fiancé’s tall, dark and handsome brother Davinder, and feels an immediate connection. The problem is that “Dav” is married with kids.

And so begins a love story that spans over a decade, filled with plenty of feels and DRAMA. But despite the cheating, it’s hard not to root for Allan and Dav and their HEA was hard won.

This isn’t a steamy book - the sex scenes are glossed over, but you still feel the strong connection and chemistry between the MCs.

The epilogue was sweet but I could have done without the very last part!
Profile Image for Gigi.
2,148 reviews1,069 followers
dnf-not-4-me
October 11, 2014
I'm not going to second guess myself on this one. The angst sounds soul shattering. Not gonna go there.

I hope it's good for those that like that heavy emotion!
98 reviews12 followers
May 27, 2013
I have read Mel Bossa's Split and love it. As I finished "In his secret life", I was crying my eyes out. Yes, they are together in the end but their journey is so tough, raw, heartaching, heartwrenching and heartbreaking. Such a beautiful, powerful love story filled with conviction and feelings. Love these two guys so much. Please do not let the infidelity thing bother you. Yes they should not have loved each other or started their affair because of the families members they will hurt. But how could they resist their love when it is meant to be right from the very beginning. They need each other to be complete. No two humans could be so right for the other. Allan and Davinder are soul mates, their love all consuming. No other writer could have expressed their love so well, which is wrong and yet so right.

Both characters are so well fleshed out. They are flawed because they embarked on their forbidden love, knowing it will hurt their loved ones. During that one year of their affair, they hid, fought, cried, dwelt in guilt yet they never stop loving. But Allan did end it even as it killed him because he is a good, decent, caring man. For the 10 years they are apart, Allan lived a shadow life, which is heartbreaking to read. What about Davinder. The story is told through Allan's powerful and stirring narration but I get to know and love Davinder just as much. Davinder is such a complex character struggling to do what is right, even as his very soul cried to be free. I thought Davinder would not survive when they were apart but he did and was a better man as a result. For 10 years these guys suffered and paid their dues. Whatever hurt they caused, they had paid their penance and redeemed themselves. I could only cheered with teary eyes when they are finally reunited because they finally deserve their love which never stop or fade. Then the ending which left me speechless. I have to reread it a few times. I get it but man..it is such an unforgettable and powerful ending which left me all choked up.

The writing is just exquisite and superb, the emotions so deep and compelling that it is almost choking. Infidelity in love story is not easy to manage as the story could turned out irritating and pathetic but Mel Bossa's super writing skills makes the story works, overriding the melodramas and transforming the story into an all consuming love which transcends. This is such a breathtaking, exquisite and unforgettable love story. And I am not shy to say I am feeling all teary eyed as I finished this review as their love story continues to resonates deeply with me. This is easily the best gay romance I have read these last few years. Such a beautiful beautiful book.
Profile Image for YullSanna.
Author 0 books37 followers
October 22, 2017
Этот автор точно заслуживает внимания. Удивительно, что у книг так мало читателей! Я пока прочла только две, но уже точно могу сказать, что они особенные. Авторский стиль - это что-то! Написано очень красиво, романтично и трогательно, но при этом меня не мутит от передозировки эмоций.
Именно эта история плотно завязана на одном из сюжетов, которые я терпеть не могу. К концу второй части думала бросить... Как же хорошо, что я этого не сделала!
Книга очень взрослая, с настоящими проблемами и непростыми (и не всегда верными) решениями. Запутанная. Сложная.
И чего я снова ставлю 4?.. эта историч вообще из другой вселенной, попсовые романчики из топов даже рядом не валялись... а я вдруг так строго сужу. Единственное, чем могу обьяснить - желание сделать и без того прекрасную вещь идеальной. Лучшей.
Я под глубоким впечатлением!
Profile Image for Ran ♠.
332 reviews17 followers
August 31, 2014
4.5 stars

Wow, what a way to end a beautifully crafted story. 
I could have cried but I didn't. Not because it wasn't tear-worthy but because I choked down every sob that would surface and held back the tears that threatened to come.
I have stalled reading this book for a while now because I knew from the moment I saw this story, it would bring so much pain in my heart. And it really did.



While cheating as a main plot might not be a read a lot of people like, the blurb of this book was interesting enough to make me want to read it. And it was indeed interesting and a very good read.
I love the writing of this book. I felt the emotions in the words I read and they hit me deep. This book brought every emotions of the characters, specially Allan, into me, made me feel their pain, their fear, their doubts and also their love. Allan's love towards Davinder. I could feel the weight of each words spoken, of his raging feelings, his thoughts and his heart. The author's writing made them all possible.
Relationship is a scary thing. Allan's past made him realize this and made him wary of going through another one. One moment it led you to believe it's meant to be but then the thing you'd know, you're crying over a broken one. 



This book is divided in three parts. 
The first part tells the story of how Allan met Davinder and how then he knew his life wouldn't be the same again. At some point in this part, I wondered if Allan were a masochist. It was torture, how they'd have to be friends with someone they're attracted to yet couldn't even touch him even tho both knew what they were for each other. At this point, temptation and morality battled with each other, of which both characters knew was a losing war.

Part one of this book gave enough to make me interested. It was slow yet painful as I witness how the feelings of these two characters grow. Each character showed enough, to keep me aching and wanting for more. To know what would happen next even though it would just make my heart ache because deep in me I knew it wouldn't go well. 
Theirs was the kind of relationship where they get to appreciate crumbs of time he can take from his lover. It was where every minute counts and maybe that's what made it endearing.
Yet despite all this, what was eating them alive? For Allan it was the guilt. The feeling that what they were doing was wrong yet they couldn't get themselves to stop.

To covet another person’s lover, and with such easiness.
It was despicable.


When the next part of Allan's life started, I was sad for him. Yet I realized he was strong enough to go through with life. However, not that strong to forget. I could feel his pain and longing in his every thought. I guess this was one of the reasons why I liked the writing, because I was able to read what was happening in Allan's heart and mind. He did the right thing, by means of morality, and at the same time by Davinder's wishes even though it cost him another broken heart. 

No, only needed to put his hands on me, and I would pretend for a few hours that I was happy.


 “I know what you need,” he said, moving over me.
Maybe he did. Maybe he had the cure.
But really, how could he give me so much pleasure when I was in such pain?




Yes, he might have been right about Davinder. Most likely, I’d be used and lied to, and my mind would be tampered with.
But sadly, I didn’t care.


This line almost brought me to tears. Because how sad is that?
But the next thing I'd read Allan thinking…

I wished I could go back and change the course of my life.


And a lot people know this phrase deeply.Yes, it's an overused phrase and Allan thought of it. Did it mean it wasn't worth being with Davinder?
At some point, I just wished Davinder would leave Allan the fuck alone because he was hurting. They both were hurting and soon would be hurting the oblivious people they love if they were to find out about their secret affair. 

And then what happened next? 



Part three was a leap of time. And time was all Allan had to become a different person. It was really painful to witness his life full of sadness and pain.

I preferred lying here, like this, in perfect communion with the darkness around me. Safe. Unmolested by the truth. Not everyone was built to fight. Some of us didn’t have the stamina for it.


At this part of the book I think Allan was just tired. Tired of everything in his life. Life had been fine with him but he was emotionally drained and it was like watching a torch slowly fade its fire. Not all the time in life you should fight. Fighting isn't always the best choice but if I were to think about it, I would have loved it if Allan had decided to think of himself at least. The decision he made was not just because of his sister and his niece but because he was scared. But what would have been the outcome had he thought about his own happiness?

I think Davinder's letter fucked me up. It pierced through me. It was really hard witnessing Allan's hurt but Davinder's last letter just made me want to cry my eyes out. 

"But my beautiful man, my half, my heart, my soul…"


Despite everything else I think I was relieved. I was glad and pleased when it all slowly move to getting better for Allan because I think he had suffered enough and deserved to be happy. Almost all throughout the book, I thought a lot about Davinde but not as much as I thought of Allan. My heart broke for them both and I wanted them to be happy. But at their circumstances, was it bad of me to want them together even from the start? Then I realized, people would think of them wrong because they were immoral. They were wrong for doing it to their family. They were the devils and the grief of their loved ones. But they were also just people who fell in love maybe in the wrong place at the wrong time. They felt different emotions like any other. Yes they were hateful in the eyes of society, but in my eyes all throughout the book, they were men in love and suffering and at the same time happy because of it. And I chose to see them as that. 



I have a thing for forbidden love. I've read a lot and this is one of my favorites. Davinder and Allan's story up to the end was bittersweet. I didn't know if the epilogue was something I expected or not. It made me happy yet it made me sad at the same time. It was really sweet to know that both were able to share a long lasting love after all they've gone through yet it was painful to read the end. I love to know that they were happy but I think it would have been better for to leave the memory of them in my heart as old men satisfied with life together.
Profile Image for Holly.
220 reviews283 followers
February 27, 2022
Let me start by saying that I do not love to leave reviews about books that I didn’t love. Negative reviews make me sad so that’s why I would like to start out by saying that this book just wasn’t for me. That is not to say that it won’t be for someone else and that’s the way it should be. We shouldn’t all love the same books. But I want to review my honest experience because I was excited about this read.


Some of my icks about this book.
- Insta love
- Fade to black

Now that we have the disclaimer out of the way I will say that I would give this book 3.2 stars. I chose this book because it was compared to If We Could Go Back. I wanted angst. I wanted a cheating trope in all honesty and this feel short. The insta ove? I felt zero chemistry between the two mmc’s. Everything about this book was rushed. The plot line had a ton of potential but fell short. The secondary characters were horrible minus Cameron as the end. I mean, his sisters actions were deplorable. And then that ending? And the epilogue? I just. It’s a no from me. This book in my opinion is a no. The conversation between the mmc’s was uncomfortable at times and felt too forced to enjoy.

All in all I really liked Cameron and would read a story about him. And I didn’t hate Allan. He was a downer for sure but I didn’t hate him.

So if you like insta love maybe give this a go? It was just too over the top insta love for me.
Profile Image for Adrianamae.
649 reviews42 followers
January 23, 2014
Okay, enough, I'm sobbing like a baby and I can't stop thinking about this book. I can't stop thinking about the characters and about how sincere or truthful it is. We are such flawed human beings, and yet we expect perfection from those we love. When they disappoint or betray us, we punish them, and make whatever was the issue about us instead of the people that were involved in the equation because we see it through the filter of what affects us.
I loved that this book gave us those different perspectives, the pettiness, the selfishness, the need of finding a guilty party, demanding a sacrifice that probably we wouldn't demand of ourselves, followed by more punishment and guilt until the guilty parties are consumed by unhappiness and stagnation. Oh those years of stagnation - years of being afraid of being hurt or destroyed again, years of not believing in ourselves, years of waiting to see if we have finally paid enough to be worthy of a happily-ever-after to finally realize that at the end, the only thing they truly needed was to believe in themselves because some loves are just meant to be. (gag) Shoot me! I just became a romantic...




Profile Image for Ery.
322 reviews2 followers
Read
May 14, 2013
Yay! Now I just need to find time to read it! ;)
Profile Image for Agalactiae.
1,361 reviews25 followers
February 21, 2021
4,25-4,5/5

C'est l'histoire de Allan, sa rencontre avec le frère de son futur beau-frère va changer sa vie.
C'est l'histoire de Davinder, un homme marié et papa, qui va être chamboulé par la rencontre d'un homme, le frère de sa future belle-soeur.
C'est une histoire d'amour, un amour interdit, un amour qui fait du mal aussi, et qui peut détruire une famille.
C'est celle de Dav et Allan, que nous allons suivre durant un long moment.

Alors, c'est un sujet scabreux et délicat. Un sujet que je n'apprécie pas des masses, à savoir la tromperie. On le sait en lisant le résumé... Et pourtant, j'ai décidé de laisser une chance à cette histoire.

J'ai été happée déjà par le personnage de Allan, nous suivons d'ailleurs son point de vue. On apprend à le connaître tout doucement au départ, son quotidien et son lien avec sa sœur et sa nièce avec lesquelles il est très proche. Une rencontre va bouleverser sa vie. On peut dire qu'il s'agit d'un coup de foudre, un coup de foudre très bien retranscrit à travers les lignes.

Je n'en dirai pas plus, je pense qu'il faut se laisser porter par les pages... Je me suis attachée aux personnages en fait. Et puis, les pages se sont tournées toutes seules, j'ai dévoré ce livre. J'ai eu mal avec eux aussi, car rien n'est facile et les chemins qu'ils empruntent ne vont pas les épargner, tout comme nous, lecteurs.

Comme je le disais, c'est un amour qui fait du mal tout autour de lui, comme on peut s'en douter.
C'est le genre de truc qui me bouleverse aussi, les déchirements, le temps qui passe, les moments vécus heureux ou pas, ceux qui auraient pu l'être, ceux ratés ou manqués...

L'épilogue est superbe vraiment, il est magnifique mais en même temps si difficile à lire et cela, pour moi en tout cas, pour différentes raisons. La joie, mais la peine aussi... Cette peine nécessaire pour avoir les moments présents, ceux futurs... et après...
Comme le dit à un moment un personnage bien particulier à un moment du récit, tout ça, pour ça ? Oui, peut-être, c'est ce que je me suis dit aussi, mais le tout étant ce qui a conduit les personnages à la fin de cette histoire.

Il m'est difficile de mettre des mots sur mes émotions. J'ai du d'ailleurs attendre plusieurs jours après la fin de ma lecture... C'est une histoire belle et triste, mais surtout belle.
Je me suis attachée aux personnages principaux comme secondaires, tous les personnages qui composent cette belle et grande famille.

Ce livre n'est pas parfait, j'ai eu du mal à mettre une note d'ailleurs. J'aurais quelques remarques à faire, notamment sur le fait d'avoir eu, dans un premier temps un coup de foudre, presque instantané. Il s'aiment, je n'en doute pas, on le ressent clairement dans la suite, mais je trouve que certains moments au début manquent de réelles complicités.
Profile Image for Hilcia.
1,374 reviews24 followers
November 5, 2013
In His Secret Life is a fantastic romance with forbidden love, sexual tension, intense yearning, and angst. It's one of those all-encompassing, sweeping, lasting romantic love stories between two men who are also selfish enough to cheat and lie to be together. They pay a high price, but in the end find their way back to love. The execution in this romance is fantastic, as Bossa follows through with all the characters, the choices, consequences, life and love. My favorite LGBT romance of the year to date... I highly recommend it.

Complete review at Impressions of a Reader
Profile Image for Snowtulip.
1,077 reviews
May 20, 2013
4.5
This book is definitely not for everyone.

There is frustration, there is drama, there is heartbreak...but damn, the love is absolutely oozing off the page!

Trapped in a life that you aren't meant to live, but trying to do right by your family can take its toll on everyone. The struggles were deep and the love could turn explosive because of this, but the book didn't shirk from the hard emotions. And yes, it did make my cry :)
Profile Image for Siren125.
277 reviews2 followers
April 30, 2024
I hate this book!

Clean prose.
Authentic characters.
It made me ugly cry.

Definitely recommend!
181 reviews1 follower
October 31, 2025
I love romance books with cheating. Mel Bossa is a very good writer. I enjoyed this one. The ending was just okay for me, but overall I enjoyed how the characters wrestle with being true to themselves and their responsibilities and relationships.
Profile Image for Byul.
1 review
September 28, 2020
Wow. Just wow.

I never write any reviews because english is not my mother language. But this book is just so amazing, i just had to write one. So here goes my first ever review..

When i first started reading this book i kept an open mind. I knew this book was about infidelity. But the plot and the characters are so well written. U could feel the angst, the pain, the joy. I cried while reading this book. I really enjoyed the build up between the two leads. I enjoyed that this story takes us with their journey through the years. We feel their sadness and their happiness. I just simply love how realistic the characters are written. You cant help but to sympathize with them. The book is just so well written that it really makes u rethink some aspects in your life. This book is a masterpiece and i recommend everyone to read this if you love a beautiful story about heartbreak and love. I would not recommend this book if you want a fluffy story. This book is a rollercoaster. But the good kind of rollercoaster that makes u want to go for another ride.

But the end. Wow. The end hit me really hard.

I am really glad i picked this book up. It will forever be one of my all time favorite books.

I will check out this author’s other work. Her writing style is very beautiful and interesting. Thank you for this amazing masterpiece.
Profile Image for Carlos.
215 reviews3 followers
May 11, 2014
One Saturday it was raining in NYC. I stayed home and read this book. I sat on the couch and curiously turn the pages. This is my first book by Mel Bossa I read. I'm a sucker for love stories, whether it'll be books, movies/TV shows, or real time stories. I liked this book because it had family drama and identity crisis. The fact the book had three parts, over 40 years period, did not bother me. It actually added to the book's appeal. I'll admit, it had a soap-opera drama feel to the book. Again, I didn't mind that. It is okay to read an easy good that doesn't require much contemplation or evoking intense emotions. I wanted more at times but I'd imagine the author left it up to our imagination.

Would I read another book by Bossa? Absolutely.
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