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Married or merry?
A humoristic book on marriage -not only in Greece but all over the world. It is based on mottos, Greek sayings and proverbs but mostly on the writer's personal experience, as a married woman.
139 pages, Paperback
First published May 5, 2012
12 people want to read
About the author
Kate Papas
2 books53 followersI was born in Athens in the last century! Although I studied to become an actress, I spent most of my professional life as a singer. After the birth of my second son I completely changed direction and started writing (singing only in the bathroom...). At the samε time I worked in elementary schools, as a teacher of theatrical activities. My most heartfelt achievement however, has been the creation of a drama group, composed of blind people.
In 2007 I won the Second National Award, conferred by the Ministry of Culture, on writers of children's theatrical plays, while in 2012 I hope to win the hearts of the American people with this little book about marriage.
I live in Athens with my original (!) husband, our two sons, an incredible tomcat and our blissfully peaceful dog.
I'm fond of reading,singing,writing. I also love poetry,music,theatre and cinema.What excites me the most is to meet interesting people. If they have a good sense of humor, then I absolutely adore them!
In 2007 I won the Second National Award, conferred by the Ministry of Culture, on writers of children's theatrical plays, while in 2012 I hope to win the hearts of the American people with this little book about marriage.
I live in Athens with my original (!) husband, our two sons, an incredible tomcat and our blissfully peaceful dog.
I'm fond of reading,singing,writing. I also love poetry,music,theatre and cinema.What excites me the most is to meet interesting people. If they have a good sense of humor, then I absolutely adore them!
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
August 30, 2012
“It’s no longer all Greek to me!”
Kate Pappas virtually opens Married or…merry: The International(?) Greek Book of Marriage, or 40 + 1 Reasons Not to Get Marrried with the following rather unhappy declaration: “Ιt is legal and acceptable for everyone to have his own personal preferences—his own tastes, beliefs and personal needs. Agreed? Sure. Only consider this: from the moment you get married, the whole idea becomes an impossible dream—an illusion.”
Had enough already? Hell, we’re just getting started!
There’s fear, adultery, children, divorce (not to mention all of its lovely tendrils) and general suffering to contend with in her treatise, and Ms. Pappas introduces us to each of these considerations while performing a verbal pirouette. Moreover—and to enliven her dance (as if that dance needed any more vim, vigor and vitality!—she spices it all up with any number of scintillating quotes from other authorities on the matter(s) at hand. Among my personal favorites are these two: “Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse” (Arthur Baer, American humorist, 1886-1969); and then, this anonymously-penned kicker: “Marriage changes passion—suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.”
These two quotes of more contemporary vintage notwithstanding, Ms. Pappas recognizes—and freely admits—that a lot of the world’s wisdom about marriage comes from her fellow Greeks, albeit from Hellenic antiquity. In case you thought—or at least wanted to believe—that our current take on marriage is somehow a product of our more cynical modern times, rest assured that such philosophical luminaries as Socrates (through Plato) reached many of the same conclusions over 2,000 years ago.
(I do have to take issue, however, with the source of one proverb—namely, “Beat your wife at least once a day. You may not know the reason, but she does”—which she quotes as a Chinese proverb. I, on the other hand, once saw it written on the wall of a restaurant in the heart (sic!) of Madrid, Spain—and saw it attributed to the Arabs. It could well be a universal sentiment. However, if a given Western people know Arabic wisdom, Spaniards do. They’ve lived just across a rather narrow channel from Araby for centuries—and are anything but ignorant where Arabic proverbs are concerned.)
I’ll close with one last quote (that Ms. Pappas shares with her readers) from the venerable François de La Rochefoucauld, who—if not exactly the Father of the Maxim, was certainly one of its most gifted purveyors: “Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.”
What can I say about this nifty little tome other than caveat lector!—in other words, read it at your own risk. If you’ve never had a single doubt about the sanctity and sanity of marriage, the worst Married or…merry can do is amuse you. If you’ve been nagged by some of the same doubts it raises and explains, however, this little tome will at least give you the comfort of knowing you’re not alone.
Kate Pappas virtually opens Married or…merry: The International(?) Greek Book of Marriage, or 40 + 1 Reasons Not to Get Marrried with the following rather unhappy declaration: “Ιt is legal and acceptable for everyone to have his own personal preferences—his own tastes, beliefs and personal needs. Agreed? Sure. Only consider this: from the moment you get married, the whole idea becomes an impossible dream—an illusion.”
Had enough already? Hell, we’re just getting started!
There’s fear, adultery, children, divorce (not to mention all of its lovely tendrils) and general suffering to contend with in her treatise, and Ms. Pappas introduces us to each of these considerations while performing a verbal pirouette. Moreover—and to enliven her dance (as if that dance needed any more vim, vigor and vitality!—she spices it all up with any number of scintillating quotes from other authorities on the matter(s) at hand. Among my personal favorites are these two: “Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse” (Arthur Baer, American humorist, 1886-1969); and then, this anonymously-penned kicker: “Marriage changes passion—suddenly you’re in bed with a relative.”
These two quotes of more contemporary vintage notwithstanding, Ms. Pappas recognizes—and freely admits—that a lot of the world’s wisdom about marriage comes from her fellow Greeks, albeit from Hellenic antiquity. In case you thought—or at least wanted to believe—that our current take on marriage is somehow a product of our more cynical modern times, rest assured that such philosophical luminaries as Socrates (through Plato) reached many of the same conclusions over 2,000 years ago.
(I do have to take issue, however, with the source of one proverb—namely, “Beat your wife at least once a day. You may not know the reason, but she does”—which she quotes as a Chinese proverb. I, on the other hand, once saw it written on the wall of a restaurant in the heart (sic!) of Madrid, Spain—and saw it attributed to the Arabs. It could well be a universal sentiment. However, if a given Western people know Arabic wisdom, Spaniards do. They’ve lived just across a rather narrow channel from Araby for centuries—and are anything but ignorant where Arabic proverbs are concerned.)
I’ll close with one last quote (that Ms. Pappas shares with her readers) from the venerable François de La Rochefoucauld, who—if not exactly the Father of the Maxim, was certainly one of its most gifted purveyors: “Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.”
What can I say about this nifty little tome other than caveat lector!—in other words, read it at your own risk. If you’ve never had a single doubt about the sanctity and sanity of marriage, the worst Married or…merry can do is amuse you. If you’ve been nagged by some of the same doubts it raises and explains, however, this little tome will at least give you the comfort of knowing you’re not alone.
September 29, 2013
“Greek Humour Editions...To all women of the world!”
I chuckled when I read this book.
Papas says that as the years flew by and life kept changing she had to find something to keep her sane and ultimately the remedy was to “only focus on the hilarious, the comic, the pleasant, the agreeable, the anodyne, the-what-ever-you want-to-call it aspect of situations.”
In this book she chose to take a tongue-in-cheek look at the universal institution of marriage. Yes, around the world WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME BOAT!! Admittedly, some of our conjugal lives are a yatch, others a warrior’s canoe, but we all have much in common, especially as far as our problems go.
Papas put a lot of research into this book of 40+1 reasons not to get married. She quotes Greek proverbs, Latin proverbs, Hindu proverbs, George Bernard Shaw, Virginie des Rieux (a French novelist) Francess Rodman (an American politician), the ceremony of marriage, Isadora Duncan, Mosaic Law, Benjamin Disraeli (British PM and Novelist), Greek sayings, Socrates, English proverbs, ZsaZsa Gabor, the bible, and oh yes, Bill Cosby! The list goes on (I don’t recall any American proverbs, but I may have missed them?? Are there any?)
To me this was a lighthearted spoof, filled with elements of truth about marriage but not a serious tome to convince people to choose to be merry, instead of married. (Note: Papas is still married to her original husband and has two sons.)
Though I don’t know her, I’d say Kate Papas is a woman of admirable character. From her biography I see she works with a drama group composed of blind people and in 2007 she won the second National Award conferred by the Ministry of culture on writers of Children’s theatrical plays, but I think she could (even may) do stand-up comedy!
I enjoyed the read. It depends on how you take it, but for me it was a lighthearted romp and I’d recommend it to anyone who enjoys humor with a glimpse of reality.
I chuckled when I read this book.
Papas says that as the years flew by and life kept changing she had to find something to keep her sane and ultimately the remedy was to “only focus on the hilarious, the comic, the pleasant, the agreeable, the anodyne, the-what-ever-you want-to-call it aspect of situations.”
In this book she chose to take a tongue-in-cheek look at the universal institution of marriage. Yes, around the world WE ARE ALL IN THE SAME BOAT!! Admittedly, some of our conjugal lives are a yatch, others a warrior’s canoe, but we all have much in common, especially as far as our problems go.
Papas put a lot of research into this book of 40+1 reasons not to get married. She quotes Greek proverbs, Latin proverbs, Hindu proverbs, George Bernard Shaw, Virginie des Rieux (a French novelist) Francess Rodman (an American politician), the ceremony of marriage, Isadora Duncan, Mosaic Law, Benjamin Disraeli (British PM and Novelist), Greek sayings, Socrates, English proverbs, ZsaZsa Gabor, the bible, and oh yes, Bill Cosby! The list goes on (I don’t recall any American proverbs, but I may have missed them?? Are there any?)
To me this was a lighthearted spoof, filled with elements of truth about marriage but not a serious tome to convince people to choose to be merry, instead of married. (Note: Papas is still married to her original husband and has two sons.)
Though I don’t know her, I’d say Kate Papas is a woman of admirable character. From her biography I see she works with a drama group composed of blind people and in 2007 she won the second National Award conferred by the Ministry of culture on writers of Children’s theatrical plays, but I think she could (even may) do stand-up comedy!
I enjoyed the read. It depends on how you take it, but for me it was a lighthearted romp and I’d recommend it to anyone who enjoys humor with a glimpse of reality.
August 14, 2013
Many a true word is spoken in jest.
Seeing that this book is built around sayings, mottos and proverbs, I thought I'd start my review the same way.
In the introduction, the author states: "The outcome of these pages may seem funny, but it's never absurd. On the contrary, it's very serious ..." She has certainly achieved that.
I smiled throughout the book, but deep inside of me, there was a dull ache at times, realizing the bitter truths that were being expounded. The book is certainly an eye opener describing how and why certain situations in marriage develop, end exposing the different agendas of the partners.
While reading, I wondered who the target audience for this book would be. (As an author, my head works that way :-) )
I was divorced after 20 years of marriage, and am happily re-married. I could certainly apply situations to my own life in both situations. So, in short, everyone will find value in this book - whether you are not yet married (but hoping to do so one day, married or divorced.
Why only 4 instead of 5 stars? I don't rightly know, and suspect it has more to do with the inner turmoil generated by the book, rather than any deficiencies in the writing or content.
I'll end off this review with another saying:
(Wo)men - you can't live with them, and you can't live without them.
Seeing that this book is built around sayings, mottos and proverbs, I thought I'd start my review the same way.
In the introduction, the author states: "The outcome of these pages may seem funny, but it's never absurd. On the contrary, it's very serious ..." She has certainly achieved that.
I smiled throughout the book, but deep inside of me, there was a dull ache at times, realizing the bitter truths that were being expounded. The book is certainly an eye opener describing how and why certain situations in marriage develop, end exposing the different agendas of the partners.
While reading, I wondered who the target audience for this book would be. (As an author, my head works that way :-) )
I was divorced after 20 years of marriage, and am happily re-married. I could certainly apply situations to my own life in both situations. So, in short, everyone will find value in this book - whether you are not yet married (but hoping to do so one day, married or divorced.
Why only 4 instead of 5 stars? I don't rightly know, and suspect it has more to do with the inner turmoil generated by the book, rather than any deficiencies in the writing or content.
I'll end off this review with another saying:
(Wo)men - you can't live with them, and you can't live without them.
October 23, 2012
This was just a fun and funny read. It was short, sweet and helped along in tone by quotes from well know American (and international) satirists. Each point is backed up with it’s own series of facts. Oddly, even with the title, tone and purpose of the book, the author doesn’t come off as much anti-marriage as anti-immature douchebags getting married.
Kate Papa’s first language is not English which makes it a pleasant surprise that she manages a Dave Barry-like tone in her style of humor. The tone of the work is knowledgeable of world-wide generalizations and uses them to advantage. Papa’s clearly did a great deal of cultural research in preparation for writing this book.
In some senses, Papa’s principles are outdated. In the forward the author acknowledges growing up in a much more traditional society than the US. Women do certain things and men do certain things. That the principles are outdated does not make them any less funny.
Kate Papa’s first language is not English which makes it a pleasant surprise that she manages a Dave Barry-like tone in her style of humor. The tone of the work is knowledgeable of world-wide generalizations and uses them to advantage. Papa’s clearly did a great deal of cultural research in preparation for writing this book.
In some senses, Papa’s principles are outdated. In the forward the author acknowledges growing up in a much more traditional society than the US. Women do certain things and men do certain things. That the principles are outdated does not make them any less funny.
September 7, 2012
This book is a laugh-filled romp through 41 reasons why you shouldn't choose marriage. Each brief chapter presents one of those reasons supported by sayings and proverbs from an international group of well known speakers. Kate Papas (who is, by the way, married) originally wrote the book in Greek for Greeks and has rewritten it for the broader English-speaking audience.
Throughout I found myself chuckling and shaking my head in agreement. At the conclusion, I was reminded that the trials of marriage and life go down best with a dose of humor. A quick read. Great fun. If you're married and need a laugh, pick up this one. If you're thinking about getting married, read this. You probably won't be dissuaded, but you won't be able to say you weren't warned!
Throughout I found myself chuckling and shaking my head in agreement. At the conclusion, I was reminded that the trials of marriage and life go down best with a dose of humor. A quick read. Great fun. If you're married and need a laugh, pick up this one. If you're thinking about getting married, read this. You probably won't be dissuaded, but you won't be able to say you weren't warned!
September 9, 2012
It may seem like this is for the unmarried trying to decide whether to make the plunge or not, however I'm thinking it is for us other poor souls who are standing around thinking, "What in the hell did I get myself into?" Very funny in a very serious sort of way. With each of the 40+ reasons not to get married I couldn't wait to get to the next one, not always understanding the point that was trying to be put forth. I am now letting it simmer in the juices of my mind. Maybe it will be well cooked when I proceed through it a second time. This definitely needs to be read more than once to get the full impact.
August 22, 2013
Married...or merry was originally written in Greek for a Greek audience, but its themes and humour are universal. Although this doesn't fall into any of my usual preferred genres, I gave it a go on recommendation and I was glad that I did. Its wry observations on the subject of marriage had me at times smiling, at times chuckling and often laughing. I'm glad I didn't read it before I got married! A cynical but funny book, it's well worth a read whether you are married or not.
August 12, 2013
This is an easy and quick read which many will connect with. The 'one liners' in particular made me giggle and I think people from many countries will relate to the 40+1 reasons not to get married. A bit of fun!
January 6, 2014
The author's history lessons, words of wisdom, quotes and hilarious insight throughout this book really did have me laughing. The light-hearted tone caught my interest at the outset, and carried on to the end of this short but entertaining work.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews