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Slave To Marshmallows: A Steampunk Fairy Tale
A marshmallow worker find out there's more to life than browning marshmallows with her torch and sets out to find more.
135 pages, Kindle Edition
Published August 1, 2012
72 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews
January 10, 2014
This collection of three linked stories successfully fuses traditional European fairy tale with steampunk serving up a greater whole.
This review is based on an open draft of the manuscript. As such details of plot and characterisation might differ from the finished book.
STM: A Steampunk Fairy Tale Spending her days working alone beside a conveyor belt, toasting marshmallows for sale to the rich, and her nights sleeping, a young girl does not realise what she is, let alone who. Until the chance gift of an orange triggers off a quest to find out what is beyond the factory floor.
The Chocolate Blunderbuss and Ostrich Speeders A jury-rigged air-ship, crewed by children, crashes into a forest of metal trees. Rescued from fire-spitting camels by a young sharpshooter, they agree to seek out the cause of the problem.
Sea Monsters and the Legacy of Mama Luna Fleeing a storm by taking their ship to the depths, a band of genetic misfits are captured by an exiled scientist. Treated as bargaining chips not people, they must face the truth of their creation.
Whether it is a deliberate choice or a result of the rough nature of the draft, the voice of the work is quite narrative. This lends it a similarity to children’s fables. Each story has an engaging plot which shows great promise despite the lack of polished prose in some areas. The intersection of magic and technology produces so especially interesting ideas.
Although the stories have a strong shared arc, the first two could also stand alone.
The revelation of who the main characters actually are and events in the wider world is well paced throughout the three tales, giving the reader the opportunity to theorise without leaving them frustrated.
I enjoyed the overall concept of this book. I recommend it to readers who enjoy interesting perspectives on fairy tales or steampunk. I suggest readers who dislike inelegant prose or small typographical errors wait for the final release.
This review is based on an open draft of the manuscript. As such details of plot and characterisation might differ from the finished book.
STM: A Steampunk Fairy Tale Spending her days working alone beside a conveyor belt, toasting marshmallows for sale to the rich, and her nights sleeping, a young girl does not realise what she is, let alone who. Until the chance gift of an orange triggers off a quest to find out what is beyond the factory floor.
The Chocolate Blunderbuss and Ostrich Speeders A jury-rigged air-ship, crewed by children, crashes into a forest of metal trees. Rescued from fire-spitting camels by a young sharpshooter, they agree to seek out the cause of the problem.
Sea Monsters and the Legacy of Mama Luna Fleeing a storm by taking their ship to the depths, a band of genetic misfits are captured by an exiled scientist. Treated as bargaining chips not people, they must face the truth of their creation.
Whether it is a deliberate choice or a result of the rough nature of the draft, the voice of the work is quite narrative. This lends it a similarity to children’s fables. Each story has an engaging plot which shows great promise despite the lack of polished prose in some areas. The intersection of magic and technology produces so especially interesting ideas.
Although the stories have a strong shared arc, the first two could also stand alone.
The revelation of who the main characters actually are and events in the wider world is well paced throughout the three tales, giving the reader the opportunity to theorise without leaving them frustrated.
I enjoyed the overall concept of this book. I recommend it to readers who enjoy interesting perspectives on fairy tales or steampunk. I suggest readers who dislike inelegant prose or small typographical errors wait for the final release.
May 16, 2013
What if Stalin was the Dictator of Candyland?
This weird and whimsical tale toggles between cutesy and creepy like; a Steampunk Strawberry Shortcake baking in a sweatshop, or My Little Ponies yoked and pulling carts of lumber, or Smurfs caste as indentured servants.
Slave to Marshmellows is told in a stream-of-consciousness "Alice in Wonderland"-esque style. The story revolves around Pumpkin, an oppressed line-operation in a candy factory. She is surrounded all day by delicious confections but the job kind of sucks as she is forced to meet production quotas under the crack of a whip. In a way it's kind of a "I hate my job" escapist fantasy crafted for those disillusioned upon discovering a dream job isn't what they imagined, with a creamy satirical center adding flavor to each bite.
Eventually Pumpkin escapes and assembles a band of misfits who go on an airship adventure. They are searching for a magical solution to heal their poisoned ideals. Along the way they encounter many colorful characters as they explore a Pepperland-like dreamscape of discovery. They find; Witches, Magic Potions, Flying Trains, an Annie Oakley-like Crack-shot, Fire Breathing Camels, Berries and Blowtorches, A Kitchen Sink, Synthetic Trees and Exotic Animals, Robots, Lumberjacks, Inventors, Chemists, and a Chocolate Gun.
There are many "out of the frying pan into the fire" moments including a surly sea monster attack and an intense and poignant supernatural finale.
If you enjoyed "Edward Scissorhands", "Twice Upon A Time", Shane Ackers' "9" or "Yellowsubmarine" you may want to a taste of this delicious steampunk marshmallow treat. Just remember, it's made with sugar, spice and everything nice...plus up to 23 child labor law violations.
This weird and whimsical tale toggles between cutesy and creepy like; a Steampunk Strawberry Shortcake baking in a sweatshop, or My Little Ponies yoked and pulling carts of lumber, or Smurfs caste as indentured servants.
Slave to Marshmellows is told in a stream-of-consciousness "Alice in Wonderland"-esque style. The story revolves around Pumpkin, an oppressed line-operation in a candy factory. She is surrounded all day by delicious confections but the job kind of sucks as she is forced to meet production quotas under the crack of a whip. In a way it's kind of a "I hate my job" escapist fantasy crafted for those disillusioned upon discovering a dream job isn't what they imagined, with a creamy satirical center adding flavor to each bite.
Eventually Pumpkin escapes and assembles a band of misfits who go on an airship adventure. They are searching for a magical solution to heal their poisoned ideals. Along the way they encounter many colorful characters as they explore a Pepperland-like dreamscape of discovery. They find; Witches, Magic Potions, Flying Trains, an Annie Oakley-like Crack-shot, Fire Breathing Camels, Berries and Blowtorches, A Kitchen Sink, Synthetic Trees and Exotic Animals, Robots, Lumberjacks, Inventors, Chemists, and a Chocolate Gun.
There are many "out of the frying pan into the fire" moments including a surly sea monster attack and an intense and poignant supernatural finale.
If you enjoyed "Edward Scissorhands", "Twice Upon A Time", Shane Ackers' "9" or "Yellowsubmarine" you may want to a taste of this delicious steampunk marshmallow treat. Just remember, it's made with sugar, spice and everything nice...plus up to 23 child labor law violations.
December 15, 2012
A very short steampunk fairytale.
My Take
The definition of a fairytale is of magic and imaginary characters and lands and this tale certainly qualifies on the imaginary end. It's rather Cinderella-esque with its wicked "parents" exploiting the child who should be loved and cared for rather than used and abused. And it's bittersweet for the poor worker who has no idea about her surroundings, and yet has enough human spirit to desire freedom.
I do wonder why Grabe couldn't at least have capitalized "worker". It seems to have been her name. Or, at least how she referred to herself. It took the second time through for me to realize that "torchbearer" was also "worker".
I did enjoy the point-of-view Grabe gave us of how worker saw her world and her interpretation of clouds was very cute. Got me thinking of roast marshmallows, chocolate...graham crackers…
However, the writing was too confusing and loosey-goosey for me.
The book's title appeared as the chapter heading followed by a number "1", which led me to expect a number "2". I did like the initial start of the story itself with its:
"Smoke.
It was her breath."
And Grabe continued with a fantastical premise of someone whose job was toasting marshmallows and keeping out the spiders. Both mouthwatering and ick-inducing! Causing me to wonder just what is going on.
Then the confusion sets in with "nobody at the factory seemed to notice her age". Yet, later on Grabe gives the impression that worker has never noticed anyone else at the factory. Other than the Baker, Cherie, and the Bright Ones.
I suppose it is possible that Grabe uses this confusing presentation to give us insight into how worker thinks, as she doesn't have a frame of reference for life as we would understand it.
What was the deal with the "bucket of water"? Was it to cover up the smell of worker? Or, simply time for her to take a bath?
I feel like I'm hanging in the wind here---right along with the kids---wondering why Mama Luna cared. Why she sent the kids off into the skies? Where did they go? Was there a plan for them, other than floating in the breeze? Why did Mama Luna do as she did with Baker and Cherie? I think I understood her reason, but why the circus? Why would Baker and Cherie acquiesce so easily?
Grabe could do with tightening this story up. A lot. There is quite a bit he could have done to enhance the gruesome aspects---that child machine is enough to start raising my hackles!
The Characters
worker is in charge of carefully toasting the precious marshmallows and is unaware of almost everything around her.
Marquis Baker is the Master Baker, the man in charge of the factory producing this luxurious delicacy. Cherie Liquouriche appears to be the floor manager.
Mama Luna is a fortuneteller with a soft heart.
The Title
The title is certainly fanciful and accurate as worker is a Slave to Marshmallows.
My Take
The definition of a fairytale is of magic and imaginary characters and lands and this tale certainly qualifies on the imaginary end. It's rather Cinderella-esque with its wicked "parents" exploiting the child who should be loved and cared for rather than used and abused. And it's bittersweet for the poor worker who has no idea about her surroundings, and yet has enough human spirit to desire freedom.
I do wonder why Grabe couldn't at least have capitalized "worker". It seems to have been her name. Or, at least how she referred to herself. It took the second time through for me to realize that "torchbearer" was also "worker".
I did enjoy the point-of-view Grabe gave us of how worker saw her world and her interpretation of clouds was very cute. Got me thinking of roast marshmallows, chocolate...graham crackers…
However, the writing was too confusing and loosey-goosey for me.
The book's title appeared as the chapter heading followed by a number "1", which led me to expect a number "2". I did like the initial start of the story itself with its:
"Smoke.
It was her breath."
And Grabe continued with a fantastical premise of someone whose job was toasting marshmallows and keeping out the spiders. Both mouthwatering and ick-inducing! Causing me to wonder just what is going on.
Then the confusion sets in with "nobody at the factory seemed to notice her age". Yet, later on Grabe gives the impression that worker has never noticed anyone else at the factory. Other than the Baker, Cherie, and the Bright Ones.
I suppose it is possible that Grabe uses this confusing presentation to give us insight into how worker thinks, as she doesn't have a frame of reference for life as we would understand it.
What was the deal with the "bucket of water"? Was it to cover up the smell of worker? Or, simply time for her to take a bath?
I feel like I'm hanging in the wind here---right along with the kids---wondering why Mama Luna cared. Why she sent the kids off into the skies? Where did they go? Was there a plan for them, other than floating in the breeze? Why did Mama Luna do as she did with Baker and Cherie? I think I understood her reason, but why the circus? Why would Baker and Cherie acquiesce so easily?
Grabe could do with tightening this story up. A lot. There is quite a bit he could have done to enhance the gruesome aspects---that child machine is enough to start raising my hackles!
The Characters
worker is in charge of carefully toasting the precious marshmallows and is unaware of almost everything around her.
Marquis Baker is the Master Baker, the man in charge of the factory producing this luxurious delicacy. Cherie Liquouriche appears to be the floor manager.
Mama Luna is a fortuneteller with a soft heart.
The Title
The title is certainly fanciful and accurate as worker is a Slave to Marshmallows.
December 21, 2013
Maybe 2 1/2 Stars
I really wish I could give this a higher rating. The story seemed to be interesting, but releasing this in a rough draft form makes no sense to me. The plot lines were a mangled mess, particularly in the last two tales in the novella. Characters were sometimes hard to follow.
On the plus side, the writer has the beginnings of some interesting world-building going on. It is imaginative and would be easy to get lost in. When the plot twists make sense, they are intriguing.
I wish to note that I read the 4th Edition of this book and as such, some editing must have been done since the unedited rough draft version was initially released. It certainly needs some more work before I could recommend this to others.
I picked this up when it was offered for free on Amazon.
I really wish I could give this a higher rating. The story seemed to be interesting, but releasing this in a rough draft form makes no sense to me. The plot lines were a mangled mess, particularly in the last two tales in the novella. Characters were sometimes hard to follow.
On the plus side, the writer has the beginnings of some interesting world-building going on. It is imaginative and would be easy to get lost in. When the plot twists make sense, they are intriguing.
I wish to note that I read the 4th Edition of this book and as such, some editing must have been done since the unedited rough draft version was initially released. It certainly needs some more work before I could recommend this to others.
I picked this up when it was offered for free on Amazon.
January 11, 2013
The story weaves a good yarn for being a short story. It invokes the feeling of isolation vs. belonging. Curiosity leads me to want to know more, since the story seems to be leading to the next with the "The End For Now" teaser.
September 6, 2013
Intriguing story about an interesting young character, that expands horizons as the story progresses. Not the story I expected when I started, nor did it go the way I thought. I was constantly surprised by the twists that came about.
August 27, 2016
Was not sure what to expect but what a pleasant surprise. Characters were developing within story and adventures provided plenty of action. Was a little on light side for steampunk which means 4 1/2 stars not 5.
December 26, 2015
Good bones of a story but the grammatical errors, incorrect word usage, and simplistic writing really got in the way of enjoying it. I appreciate the effort the author has put into the story but proofreading and editing are just as important as writing.
December 16, 2012
A very, very short and rather strange story, this could be very interesting with more work and development. As is, it was unsatisfying.
September 6, 2016
Now I had a great time reading this Steampunk fairy tale. Author knows business of Steampunk so created a delightful story.
Displaying 1 - 10 of 10 reviews