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What Doctors Feel: How Emotions Affect the Practice of Medicine
A look at the emotional side of medicine—the shame, fear, anger, anxiety, empathy, and even love that affect patient care
Physicians are assumed to be objective, rational beings, easily able to detach as they guide patients and families through some of life’s most challenging moments. But doctors’ emotional responses to the life-and-death dramas of everyday practice have a profound impact on medical care. And while much has been written about the minds and methods of the medical professionals who save our lives, precious little has been said about their emotions. In What Doctors Feel, Dr. Danielle Ofri has taken on the task of dissecting the hidden emotional responses of doctors, and how these directly influence patients.
How do the stresses of medical life—from paperwork to grueling hours to lawsuits to facing death—affect the medical care that doctors can offer their patients? Digging deep into the lives of doctors, Ofri examines the daunting range of emotions—shame, anger, empathy, frustration, hope, pride, occasionally despair, and sometimes even love—that permeate the contemporary doctor-patient connection. Drawing on scientific studies, including some surprising research, Dr. Danielle Ofri offers up an unflinching look at the impact of emotions on health care.
With her renowned eye for dramatic detail, Dr. Ofri takes us into the swirling heart of patient care, telling stories of caregivers caught up and occasionally torn down by the whirlwind life of doctoring. She admits to the humiliation of an error that nearly killed one of her patients and her forever fear of making another. She mourns when a beloved patient is denied a heart transplant. She tells the riveting stories of an intern traumatized when she is forced to let a newborn die in her arms, and of a doctor whose daily glass of wine to handle the frustrations of the ER escalates into a destructive addiction. But doctors don’t only feel fear, grief, and frustration. Ofri also reveals that doctors tell bad jokes about “toxic sock syndrome,” cope through gallows humor, find hope in impossible situations, and surrender to ecstatic happiness when they triumph over illness. The stories here reveal the undeniable truth that emotions have a distinct effect on how doctors care for their patients. For both clinicians and patients, understanding what doctors feel can make all the difference in giving and getting the best medical care.
Physicians are assumed to be objective, rational beings, easily able to detach as they guide patients and families through some of life’s most challenging moments. But doctors’ emotional responses to the life-and-death dramas of everyday practice have a profound impact on medical care. And while much has been written about the minds and methods of the medical professionals who save our lives, precious little has been said about their emotions. In What Doctors Feel, Dr. Danielle Ofri has taken on the task of dissecting the hidden emotional responses of doctors, and how these directly influence patients.
How do the stresses of medical life—from paperwork to grueling hours to lawsuits to facing death—affect the medical care that doctors can offer their patients? Digging deep into the lives of doctors, Ofri examines the daunting range of emotions—shame, anger, empathy, frustration, hope, pride, occasionally despair, and sometimes even love—that permeate the contemporary doctor-patient connection. Drawing on scientific studies, including some surprising research, Dr. Danielle Ofri offers up an unflinching look at the impact of emotions on health care.
With her renowned eye for dramatic detail, Dr. Ofri takes us into the swirling heart of patient care, telling stories of caregivers caught up and occasionally torn down by the whirlwind life of doctoring. She admits to the humiliation of an error that nearly killed one of her patients and her forever fear of making another. She mourns when a beloved patient is denied a heart transplant. She tells the riveting stories of an intern traumatized when she is forced to let a newborn die in her arms, and of a doctor whose daily glass of wine to handle the frustrations of the ER escalates into a destructive addiction. But doctors don’t only feel fear, grief, and frustration. Ofri also reveals that doctors tell bad jokes about “toxic sock syndrome,” cope through gallows humor, find hope in impossible situations, and surrender to ecstatic happiness when they triumph over illness. The stories here reveal the undeniable truth that emotions have a distinct effect on how doctors care for their patients. For both clinicians and patients, understanding what doctors feel can make all the difference in giving and getting the best medical care.
232 pages, Hardcover
First published June 4, 2013
335 people are currently reading
9781 people want to read
About the author
Danielle Ofri
32 books309 followersWhen I started medical school, I had no idea that I would become a writer. I'd completed a PhD in the biochemistry of endorphin receptors, and planned to become a bench scientist with a once-a-week clinic to see patients.
But during residency, I fell in love with patient-care, and realized that I'd have to put bench research aside. After three years of training, I took off some time to travel. I spent 18 months on the road, working occasional medical temp-jobs to earn money, and then exploring Latin America for as long as my money would last.
It was during these travels, during this first true break from medicine, that I started writing down the stories of my medical training at Bellevue Hospital. I had no intentions about a book, or publishing at all, but I just needed to unload some of the stories that had built up over the years.
When I came back to medical practice, writing kept itself going in my life. Then I helped found the Bellevue Literary Review, which was another way to incorporate literature into medicine. Now, my time is split between clinical medicine, teaching, writing, editing, my newest hobby--cello, (and of course my three wonderful children!).
But during residency, I fell in love with patient-care, and realized that I'd have to put bench research aside. After three years of training, I took off some time to travel. I spent 18 months on the road, working occasional medical temp-jobs to earn money, and then exploring Latin America for as long as my money would last.
It was during these travels, during this first true break from medicine, that I started writing down the stories of my medical training at Bellevue Hospital. I had no intentions about a book, or publishing at all, but I just needed to unload some of the stories that had built up over the years.
When I came back to medical practice, writing kept itself going in my life. Then I helped found the Bellevue Literary Review, which was another way to incorporate literature into medicine. Now, my time is split between clinical medicine, teaching, writing, editing, my newest hobby--cello, (and of course my three wonderful children!).
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 258 reviews
February 8, 2023
This is a very deep and reflective book, the sort of book that you think of for a long time after you've finished it. What I took away from it most, is that if you have a good relationship with your doctor, both of you are likely to have better outcomes, at least emotionally. Sometimes this isn't possible, who gets to know their anaesthetist ? But where it is possible, it is worth making the effort to connect.
Doctors in doctor books and doctor shows usually say that they have to turn off their emotions when treating patients, but then there are books that are entitled things like 34 Patients: The profound and uplifting memoir about the patients who changed one doctor’s life. It seems that doctors (try and) switch off emotions when working, but in the moments in between there is time for reflection and feeling. The author goes through many of the emotions from empathy to anger a doctor might feel. The one that spoke to me most was empathy and the seeming lack of it when it becomes a very nasty form of humour indeed.
Empathy. There is a test for medical students that shows whether they are more or less empathetic, whether they lean more towards cure or care. Those who lean more towards care go into specialities that are patient-orientated like pediatrics, primary care and psychiatry, and those who are more treatment-orientated are more likely to choose radiology. So reading that I was kind of horrified to learn of the total lack of empathy by all of them in their sense of humour beginning as medical students
The book has running through it one particular case. An illegal immigrant in need of a heart transplant but no way to pay for it. She is a young mother and very cheery despite her illness. There are ups and downs and really big ups and terrible downs, and as the author felt it so she writes it that we may feel as she did. It made my eyes prickle, and I hardly ever cry in books.
It was an excellent read, I had previously read
Singular Intimacies: Becoming a Doctor at Bellevue and
When We Do Harm: A Doctor Confronts Medical Error
and knew what to expect - plenty of cases where the patient is as important as the disease, which always makes for good reading. Ofri treats the subject of her books in a slightly different way from other 'doctor' authors and thereby illuminates them from angles I hadn't thought of. The writing is excellent too. Recommended to all who love the non-fiction medical genre and maybe to those who have a bent for philosophy too.
Doctors in doctor books and doctor shows usually say that they have to turn off their emotions when treating patients, but then there are books that are entitled things like 34 Patients: The profound and uplifting memoir about the patients who changed one doctor’s life. It seems that doctors (try and) switch off emotions when working, but in the moments in between there is time for reflection and feeling. The author goes through many of the emotions from empathy to anger a doctor might feel. The one that spoke to me most was empathy and the seeming lack of it when it becomes a very nasty form of humour indeed.
Empathy. There is a test for medical students that shows whether they are more or less empathetic, whether they lean more towards cure or care. Those who lean more towards care go into specialities that are patient-orientated like pediatrics, primary care and psychiatry, and those who are more treatment-orientated are more likely to choose radiology. So reading that I was kind of horrified to learn of the total lack of empathy by all of them in their sense of humour beginning as medical students
It turns out that there are complex rules for the “humor game,” never verbalized but universally agreed upon. Only the most senior physician can initiate joking, for example, and that person sets the acceptability meter for humorous banter; no joke can go beyond the line drawn by the most senior doctor’s joke.Doctors apparently view the medical issues of alcoholics, drug addicts and obese people as being brought on by themselves and not deserving of sympathy, certainly not empathy.These jokes, of course are behind patients' backs and begin as soon as the patients are out of sight in the ER or wards.There are unspoken but clear rules for acceptable targets: drug abusers are okay; cancer patients are not. Alcoholism and obesity are okay; miscarriage is not. Schizophrenic and borderline patients—yes; terminally ill patients—no. And children with cancer—never.
The book has running through it one particular case. An illegal immigrant in need of a heart transplant but no way to pay for it. She is a young mother and very cheery despite her illness. There are ups and downs and really big ups and terrible downs, and as the author felt it so she writes it that we may feel as she did. It made my eyes prickle, and I hardly ever cry in books.
It was an excellent read, I had previously read
Singular Intimacies: Becoming a Doctor at Bellevue and
When We Do Harm: A Doctor Confronts Medical Error
and knew what to expect - plenty of cases where the patient is as important as the disease, which always makes for good reading. Ofri treats the subject of her books in a slightly different way from other 'doctor' authors and thereby illuminates them from angles I hadn't thought of. The writing is excellent too. Recommended to all who love the non-fiction medical genre and maybe to those who have a bent for philosophy too.
March 12, 2013
Physician Danielle Ofri's latest book, "What Doctors Feel," is part of her ongoing attempt to bridge the patient/doctor gap, as seen in her earlier works. While this latest work focuses on the emotions doctor's go through, Ofri's point is that those emotions impact care. Learning more about what doctors feel can help, not only the medical profession, but patients as well. What becomes alarmingly clear is that little is done to help doctors deal with the range of emotions that run through them. As a result, doctors suffer burnout, patients are treated with more distance, and the medical profession as a whole suffers.
As medicine becomes more high tech, there exists the possibility that the distance will grow. Ofri cautions us not to be fooled by such possibilities. "No matter how many high tech tools enter the picture, the doctor-patient interaction is still primarily a human one. And when humans connect, emotions by necessity weave an underlying network."
Much of the issue is found in the training of the doctors. Ofri shares the work of the 19th century physician and teacher, Sir William Osler, who encouraged young doctors to create a distance between themselves and the patient. The idea centers around the ability to make more logical decisions when the mind is not clouded by emotion. Osler did not want the doctors to treat their patients as mere subjects, but he did not want them distracted from making clear medical decisions.
That training remains, and Ofri uses stories to tell about the times when ignoring the complete care of the patient, in the interest of medical care, led to disasters. Conversely, she shares stories of when doctors have failed to keep that emotional distance, and as a result, better decisions were made. Nevertheless, she bemoans "the consistent and depressing observation that medical students seem to lose prodigious amounts of empathy as they progress along the medical training route."
Not surprisingly, doctors hit the normal range of emotions. Grief, joy, sadness, guilt, shame, anger, and frustration are all part of the range any normal doctor, or person, will go through. What is different, is the intensity of the emotion. If I make an error in this book review, I may feel guilty, but I do not carry the weight of causing the death of someone due to that mistake. Doctors do.
Where the books wanders at times is when Ofri focuses too much on lawsuits and medical errors. But her point in addressing those areas point out the feelings of guilt and shame that doctors experience. Our tendency to sue for every real or supposed error, contributes to our own problems in the medical world. "Unless we can somehow defuse the shame and loss of self-definition that accompany the admission of medical errors, the gut instinct to hide an error will always be the first lynx to pounce upon the heart."
Ofri clearly wants us to address the emotional needs of doctors, for their sake and for the sake of patients. Doctors who feel safer making an emotional connection will provide better care for their patients. How we are to improve the system is not clear, but Ofri's intent seems to simply get the issue recognized. There have been inroads made, and she highlights the work of Herdley Paolini at Florida Hospital, where they have developed a program to address the emotional needs of all their staff. But, clearly, much work remains.
While doctors and patients will benefit from reading Ofri's work, perhaps legislators and hospital administrators, those with the most power to change the situation, should read this book. Regardless, Ofri's point is clear. When a doctor and patient interact, they are really two humans interacting. Emotions will be part of the relationship. Perhaps we should pay more attention to what those emotions mean in the medical world.
As medicine becomes more high tech, there exists the possibility that the distance will grow. Ofri cautions us not to be fooled by such possibilities. "No matter how many high tech tools enter the picture, the doctor-patient interaction is still primarily a human one. And when humans connect, emotions by necessity weave an underlying network."
Much of the issue is found in the training of the doctors. Ofri shares the work of the 19th century physician and teacher, Sir William Osler, who encouraged young doctors to create a distance between themselves and the patient. The idea centers around the ability to make more logical decisions when the mind is not clouded by emotion. Osler did not want the doctors to treat their patients as mere subjects, but he did not want them distracted from making clear medical decisions.
That training remains, and Ofri uses stories to tell about the times when ignoring the complete care of the patient, in the interest of medical care, led to disasters. Conversely, she shares stories of when doctors have failed to keep that emotional distance, and as a result, better decisions were made. Nevertheless, she bemoans "the consistent and depressing observation that medical students seem to lose prodigious amounts of empathy as they progress along the medical training route."
Not surprisingly, doctors hit the normal range of emotions. Grief, joy, sadness, guilt, shame, anger, and frustration are all part of the range any normal doctor, or person, will go through. What is different, is the intensity of the emotion. If I make an error in this book review, I may feel guilty, but I do not carry the weight of causing the death of someone due to that mistake. Doctors do.
Where the books wanders at times is when Ofri focuses too much on lawsuits and medical errors. But her point in addressing those areas point out the feelings of guilt and shame that doctors experience. Our tendency to sue for every real or supposed error, contributes to our own problems in the medical world. "Unless we can somehow defuse the shame and loss of self-definition that accompany the admission of medical errors, the gut instinct to hide an error will always be the first lynx to pounce upon the heart."
Ofri clearly wants us to address the emotional needs of doctors, for their sake and for the sake of patients. Doctors who feel safer making an emotional connection will provide better care for their patients. How we are to improve the system is not clear, but Ofri's intent seems to simply get the issue recognized. There have been inroads made, and she highlights the work of Herdley Paolini at Florida Hospital, where they have developed a program to address the emotional needs of all their staff. But, clearly, much work remains.
While doctors and patients will benefit from reading Ofri's work, perhaps legislators and hospital administrators, those with the most power to change the situation, should read this book. Regardless, Ofri's point is clear. When a doctor and patient interact, they are really two humans interacting. Emotions will be part of the relationship. Perhaps we should pay more attention to what those emotions mean in the medical world.
July 11, 2013
I received this book as a First Reads winner on Goodreads. It is an eye-opening account of the many issues that doctors face while trying to give good patient care. As patients, we expect to go to the doctor, have them listen attentively to our concerns, accurately diagnose us, while having a respectful, caring bedside manner. Yet, maybe the doctor is in the middle of a lawsuit and questioning every aspect of the care they give. Maybe one of their patients just died and they are grieving. Maybe they just made a medical error and are feeling the repercussions from that. Not only will these issues affect the doctor, but the emotions involved and how the doctor handles them will have consequences for all future patients of that doctor.
I wish every patient would read this book. As patients we expect all the best from our doctors without a thought of all the stress they have in their lives. The long hours they put in, the immense amount of knowledge they are expected to keep on top of, and the fact that they have lives outside of being a doctor, too! Doctors are human beings and have emotions just like the rest of us. I gave this book 5 stars because this is one that will stay on my mind for a long time. I found it very thought provoking. I will never have another interaction with a doctor without thinking of this book.
I wish every patient would read this book. As patients we expect all the best from our doctors without a thought of all the stress they have in their lives. The long hours they put in, the immense amount of knowledge they are expected to keep on top of, and the fact that they have lives outside of being a doctor, too! Doctors are human beings and have emotions just like the rest of us. I gave this book 5 stars because this is one that will stay on my mind for a long time. I found it very thought provoking. I will never have another interaction with a doctor without thinking of this book.
July 18, 2023
Hi,
Sometimes I spend my nights thinking about how I can control my excessive emotions and how I can get rid of my feelings that are mixed with my breath.
In my first year of medical training, I got depressed several times. I was my parents girl who avoided speaking for unknown reasons. How can I speak besides all of these sufferings I was meeting every day? The first time I explained was about the young one I met in the ICU, and at this time, my parents couldn’t speak either.
Yup, my Academic years were emotionless; only I was trying to study well for the exam; I didn't know anything about these critical situations. But now I'm growing, I'm full, I can be beside them, and I can understand the emotions that transfer from them and stick to my skin.
..
And, this is only one side, the patient one, but what about you? What about being unable to do anything to rescue your poor patient? What about doing a small fault that ends your patient's life? What about being very sad, weak, and fragile, but you must overcome to continue, to meet new deaths, to meet new sufferings?
You know, I think positive emotions we get from poor people that we were only a reason to rescue are the cover, but negative ones that dip inside are the core.
..
Oh, ohh, What doctors feel? How they can stand in the face of death? It's a long story; I strat it for a very very short time. And What will happen? Idk, but I pray for peace, and I hope one day I will be good..
Sometimes I spend my nights thinking about how I can control my excessive emotions and how I can get rid of my feelings that are mixed with my breath.
In my first year of medical training, I got depressed several times. I was my parents girl who avoided speaking for unknown reasons. How can I speak besides all of these sufferings I was meeting every day? The first time I explained was about the young one I met in the ICU, and at this time, my parents couldn’t speak either.
Yup, my Academic years were emotionless; only I was trying to study well for the exam; I didn't know anything about these critical situations. But now I'm growing, I'm full, I can be beside them, and I can understand the emotions that transfer from them and stick to my skin.
..
And, this is only one side, the patient one, but what about you? What about being unable to do anything to rescue your poor patient? What about doing a small fault that ends your patient's life? What about being very sad, weak, and fragile, but you must overcome to continue, to meet new deaths, to meet new sufferings?
You know, I think positive emotions we get from poor people that we were only a reason to rescue are the cover, but negative ones that dip inside are the core.
..
Oh, ohh, What doctors feel? How they can stand in the face of death? It's a long story; I strat it for a very very short time. And What will happen? Idk, but I pray for peace, and I hope one day I will be good..
April 11, 2023
“In general, empathy is easier the more we can identify with someone. When we can genuinely envision ourselves in a situation, it's possible to intuit what that person's suffering might feel like.”
I listened to this one on audiobook on my way to work and back home which made it even more relatable. I came upon the book by chance when I saw it mentioned on a social media post and the name immediately intrigued me.
I think it is a very important book for doctors but also for anyone who interacts with doctors -basically everyone- because as the book explains, if there is a mutual understanding between the two sides that will lead to the best outcomes.
There was a ton of relatable stuff in this book, and I was talking to my colleague who was feeling down and guilty because a kid died in the PICU and she was thinking what we could have done more although I am pretty sure we had done everything already and reading this helped me to lift her up as much as possible.
The good thing is the writing is very accessible and does not require prior medical knowledge to delve into it. The author did not bombard readers with medical jargon which shows it is directed towards all kind of readers.
I am happy I read this one and I will probably discover more of the author's books.
I listened to this one on audiobook on my way to work and back home which made it even more relatable. I came upon the book by chance when I saw it mentioned on a social media post and the name immediately intrigued me.
I think it is a very important book for doctors but also for anyone who interacts with doctors -basically everyone- because as the book explains, if there is a mutual understanding between the two sides that will lead to the best outcomes.
There was a ton of relatable stuff in this book, and I was talking to my colleague who was feeling down and guilty because a kid died in the PICU and she was thinking what we could have done more although I am pretty sure we had done everything already and reading this helped me to lift her up as much as possible.
The good thing is the writing is very accessible and does not require prior medical knowledge to delve into it. The author did not bombard readers with medical jargon which shows it is directed towards all kind of readers.
I am happy I read this one and I will probably discover more of the author's books.
January 21, 2018
I read this because I had realized that I'm over a quarter done my residency already and I fear I will never know enough to be useful to my patients.
Were my fears assuaged? To put it bluntly, no, but the job of this book wasn't necessarily to take away my fear. It was just a relief to read actual stories of other residents and staff (in the US) and their experiences with mistakes, bad luck, and the pressures of being a physician. All of the stories were relatable, and I felt my stomach sink and my heart race as they unfolded because I imagined myself in those same situations.
The only thing I didn't agree with in this book was one of the author's earlier points about humour in medicine. I don't think that all humour erodes empathy. I agree that there are degrees of humour that is deemed acceptable, but I do not believe her assertion that in general, medical jokes contribute to a loss of empathy throughout medical training. It's part of my style to have some fun with my job and relate to my patients and if that happens to be through humour, then think it's valuable. The jokes made behind closed doors are sometimes coping mechanisms (as Ofri insists) but I don't think that this necessarily undermines the relationships that I build with my patients. Some people are harder to relate to than others but I can't say I've ever blamed it on the degree of inappropriate humour.
Read if you're interested to see how physicians actually respond to the traumas and stressors in their lives. Empathy goes both ways, and all of us are trying to do the best that we can; unfortunately when something goes wrong, this is often overlooked.
Were my fears assuaged? To put it bluntly, no, but the job of this book wasn't necessarily to take away my fear. It was just a relief to read actual stories of other residents and staff (in the US) and their experiences with mistakes, bad luck, and the pressures of being a physician. All of the stories were relatable, and I felt my stomach sink and my heart race as they unfolded because I imagined myself in those same situations.
The only thing I didn't agree with in this book was one of the author's earlier points about humour in medicine. I don't think that all humour erodes empathy. I agree that there are degrees of humour that is deemed acceptable, but I do not believe her assertion that in general, medical jokes contribute to a loss of empathy throughout medical training. It's part of my style to have some fun with my job and relate to my patients and if that happens to be through humour, then think it's valuable. The jokes made behind closed doors are sometimes coping mechanisms (as Ofri insists) but I don't think that this necessarily undermines the relationships that I build with my patients. Some people are harder to relate to than others but I can't say I've ever blamed it on the degree of inappropriate humour.
Read if you're interested to see how physicians actually respond to the traumas and stressors in their lives. Empathy goes both ways, and all of us are trying to do the best that we can; unfortunately when something goes wrong, this is often overlooked.
February 23, 2022
“Fear, like all emotions, is neither good nor bad; it is simply one of the normal states of being.”
WHAT DOCTORS FEEL kể về những cảm xúc mà bác sĩ phải trải qua, từ choáng ngợp, sợ hãi, giận dữ, tới buồn đau… mà mỗi cảm xúc đều là hệ quả cũng như tác nhân gây ảnh hưởng đến công việc của họ. Khi nghĩ về nghề y, nhiều người sẽ có quan điểm rằng bác sỹ cần gạt bỏ những cảm xúc xao động và càng lý trí càng tốt, để cho các quyết định của họ được chính xác và khoa học nhất có thể. Ngược lại, chúng ta cũng kì vọng “lương y như từ mẫu”, nghĩa là bác sĩ cần thể hiện lòng nhân ái, tình cảm với bệnh nhân. Trên thực tế, như câu quote ở trên — bác sỹ cũng là con người chứa đựng tất cả những cảm xúc mà một con người có. Họ cần phải tìm được điểm cân bằng, nếu quá sợ hãi sẽ mất tỉnh táo không thực hiện được nhiệm vụ, nếu không sợ gì thì dễ dẫn tới coi thường tính mạng của người bệnh. Nhưng không có cảm xúc nào là tốt hay xấu, tiêu cực hay tích cực, nó chỉ là một phần của cuộc sống. Cuốn sách đưa người đọc qua những câu chuyện thật về những gì bác sĩ và bệnh nhân của họ phải trải qua, cả những nghiên cứu, những con số biết nói về áp lực và những vấn đề đó, tới một số giải pháp giúp tạo ra điều kiện làm việc tốt hơn cho bác sỹ. Càng đọc thì mình lại càng thấy nghề y là nghề khó nhất nhất trong các nghề, vì một quyết định sai lầm có thể đổi bằng tính mạng con người, mà nhiều lúc thật sự rất khó để đánh giá quyết định thế nào là đúng là sai. Nhưng người bác sĩ sẽ phải sống mãi với những quyết định đó của mình.
“The final common pathway is the heart. For what matters finally is how the human spirit is spent.” - John Stone
WHAT DOCTORS FEEL kể về những cảm xúc mà bác sĩ phải trải qua, từ choáng ngợp, sợ hãi, giận dữ, tới buồn đau… mà mỗi cảm xúc đều là hệ quả cũng như tác nhân gây ảnh hưởng đến công việc của họ. Khi nghĩ về nghề y, nhiều người sẽ có quan điểm rằng bác sỹ cần gạt bỏ những cảm xúc xao động và càng lý trí càng tốt, để cho các quyết định của họ được chính xác và khoa học nhất có thể. Ngược lại, chúng ta cũng kì vọng “lương y như từ mẫu”, nghĩa là bác sĩ cần thể hiện lòng nhân ái, tình cảm với bệnh nhân. Trên thực tế, như câu quote ở trên — bác sỹ cũng là con người chứa đựng tất cả những cảm xúc mà một con người có. Họ cần phải tìm được điểm cân bằng, nếu quá sợ hãi sẽ mất tỉnh táo không thực hiện được nhiệm vụ, nếu không sợ gì thì dễ dẫn tới coi thường tính mạng của người bệnh. Nhưng không có cảm xúc nào là tốt hay xấu, tiêu cực hay tích cực, nó chỉ là một phần của cuộc sống. Cuốn sách đưa người đọc qua những câu chuyện thật về những gì bác sĩ và bệnh nhân của họ phải trải qua, cả những nghiên cứu, những con số biết nói về áp lực và những vấn đề đó, tới một số giải pháp giúp tạo ra điều kiện làm việc tốt hơn cho bác sỹ. Càng đọc thì mình lại càng thấy nghề y là nghề khó nhất nhất trong các nghề, vì một quyết định sai lầm có thể đổi bằng tính mạng con người, mà nhiều lúc thật sự rất khó để đánh giá quyết định thế nào là đúng là sai. Nhưng người bác sĩ sẽ phải sống mãi với những quyết định đó của mình.
“The final common pathway is the heart. For what matters finally is how the human spirit is spent.” - John Stone
July 4, 2014
An important book to read if you're a doctor, or interested in becoming a doctor. Or if you know someone who wants to be a doctor. Or if you know a doctor.
It's even useful if you ever plan to see a doctor. In short: read this book.
As the title suggests, it's about the emotional life of physicians. Ofri connects that theme to many aspects of the medical-care world. The lucid, penetrating, thoughtful, heartfelt, even heartbreaking prose gives us readers a banquet-for-thought about everything from our relationships to our doctors to the Gordian knot of the American health-care system.
It's even useful if you ever plan to see a doctor. In short: read this book.
As the title suggests, it's about the emotional life of physicians. Ofri connects that theme to many aspects of the medical-care world. The lucid, penetrating, thoughtful, heartfelt, even heartbreaking prose gives us readers a banquet-for-thought about everything from our relationships to our doctors to the Gordian knot of the American health-care system.
November 5, 2017
A crucially important topic covered in a roundabout way. This book is a collection of anecdotes from a physician, all demonstrating the human side of medicine. After each one, she offers her perspective on the state of empathy in medicine as it currently stands, and what we must keep in mind when dealing with either doctors or patients.
It can be difficult to pull off a book of various, disconnected anecdotes. The books that do that truly well all have a strong thread linking each story together somehow, and also follow some type of coherent logic. Though it’s hinted at throughout, it was difficult to pin down exactly what this author’s main argument was. There are some great anecdotes about her clinical experiences, but the arc of the book as a whole left something to be desired. It can be difficult to find that thread in this book, to the point that this might be better off as a series of short stories. As such, I found it difficult to want to stay in this book for its entirety. I had no problem reading one story, then not feeling the need to read the remaining stories.
I greatly value the author's perspective on medicine, and I felt that she had a unique and important perspective to offer. However, this novel was not unbiased by any means. It felt like the author had one purpose throughout this book and would hammer it over our heads the entire time. This isn't a bad thing for a book to do, but it opens up the risk of not covering both sides of an important issue. For example, the author talks about how necessary empathy is in medicine. But what about the need to harden your heart after your patients die? I would have really enjoyed to hear more of her perspective on the need for emotional detachment in medicine, and then tell us why empathy is a more important tool for the physician. I worry that a year from now, the only thing I will remember from this book is “Doctors should have empathy,” but I don’t think anyone needs to read a book to believe that to be true.
This book is a decent introduction to the topic of empathy in medicine for those unfamiliar with it, but does not provide a fresh take on addressing it. It also does not tell both sides of the story, which is something to keep in mind while reading it. Rather than reading this, you may be better off reading some of the articles the author has published elsewhere. People interested in this topic should also consider reading "When the Air Hits Your Brain" by Frank Vertosick Jr. and any of the work by Atul Gawande.
It can be difficult to pull off a book of various, disconnected anecdotes. The books that do that truly well all have a strong thread linking each story together somehow, and also follow some type of coherent logic. Though it’s hinted at throughout, it was difficult to pin down exactly what this author’s main argument was. There are some great anecdotes about her clinical experiences, but the arc of the book as a whole left something to be desired. It can be difficult to find that thread in this book, to the point that this might be better off as a series of short stories. As such, I found it difficult to want to stay in this book for its entirety. I had no problem reading one story, then not feeling the need to read the remaining stories.
I greatly value the author's perspective on medicine, and I felt that she had a unique and important perspective to offer. However, this novel was not unbiased by any means. It felt like the author had one purpose throughout this book and would hammer it over our heads the entire time. This isn't a bad thing for a book to do, but it opens up the risk of not covering both sides of an important issue. For example, the author talks about how necessary empathy is in medicine. But what about the need to harden your heart after your patients die? I would have really enjoyed to hear more of her perspective on the need for emotional detachment in medicine, and then tell us why empathy is a more important tool for the physician. I worry that a year from now, the only thing I will remember from this book is “Doctors should have empathy,” but I don’t think anyone needs to read a book to believe that to be true.
This book is a decent introduction to the topic of empathy in medicine for those unfamiliar with it, but does not provide a fresh take on addressing it. It also does not tell both sides of the story, which is something to keep in mind while reading it. Rather than reading this, you may be better off reading some of the articles the author has published elsewhere. People interested in this topic should also consider reading "When the Air Hits Your Brain" by Frank Vertosick Jr. and any of the work by Atul Gawande.
January 26, 2024
Dr. Ofri gives a glimpse to the emotional side of a doctor’s world, where stress, anxiety and even anger are constantly lurking around the corner. She reflects on mistakes that almost took a patient’s life, and deeply examines empathy, that is expected to be in the core of a doctor’s work.
Ironically, empathy is also the characteristic first lost when stress and anxiety step into the room. Dr. Ofri goes to explain how the natural empathy of medical students wears down already during medical school: the school world is orderly, clean and definitive, even if the content to be swallowed is overwheling. But when the ambitious students enter the ever-stressful world of real medicine, they find themselves in impossible situations: how to be in time when two engagements in the opposite ends of the hospitals end and start at the same minute or how to understand the doctor jargon full of abbreviations and odd nicknames.. or what to do when a patient collapses in front of you?
If you think about the world of doctors, it’s very contradictory overall; doctors are expected to be understanding, but simultaneously not too emotionally engaged and touchy-feely, because reasoning must be the primary tool in diagnostics and care; they are expected to be perfect (and many of them have perfectionist tendencies), but mistakes are bound to happen, because they are human, too. Doctors readily take the compliments from triumph, but equally as much take the blame when something goes wrong – Dr. Ofri draws here an interesting point about the distinction between shame and guilt. Guilt is something that is related to a particular incident, it’s something doctors can usually get over with, but the shame that ’reflects a failure of one’s entire being’ is much harder to tolerate. Dr. Ofri reflects on one of her mistakes:
’Of course I felt guilty—that was the easy part. I had no trouble with berating myself for the error. But it was the shame that was paralyzing. It was the shame of realizing that I was not who I thought I was, that I was not who I’d been telling my patient and my intern I was. It wasn’t that I was forgetful or momentarily distracted. It was not that I was neglectful or even uncaring. It was that up until that moment, I’d thought I was a competent, even excellent, doctor. In one crashing moment of realization, that persona shattered to bits.’
It is delightful to see, that this century has begun paying attention to relieving the presssures, caused by hospital life, in different kinds of programmes that first and foremost offer peer support (something like talking about your own mistakes has been a totally no-go topic to discuss).
It’s hard to think Finnish health care system would be as harsh towards doctors as the American one described in the book, but the take-home-message that doctors’ mental health is something worth keeping eye on because it is directly projecting to the clinical work, is worth remembering.
Ironically, empathy is also the characteristic first lost when stress and anxiety step into the room. Dr. Ofri goes to explain how the natural empathy of medical students wears down already during medical school: the school world is orderly, clean and definitive, even if the content to be swallowed is overwheling. But when the ambitious students enter the ever-stressful world of real medicine, they find themselves in impossible situations: how to be in time when two engagements in the opposite ends of the hospitals end and start at the same minute or how to understand the doctor jargon full of abbreviations and odd nicknames.. or what to do when a patient collapses in front of you?
If you think about the world of doctors, it’s very contradictory overall; doctors are expected to be understanding, but simultaneously not too emotionally engaged and touchy-feely, because reasoning must be the primary tool in diagnostics and care; they are expected to be perfect (and many of them have perfectionist tendencies), but mistakes are bound to happen, because they are human, too. Doctors readily take the compliments from triumph, but equally as much take the blame when something goes wrong – Dr. Ofri draws here an interesting point about the distinction between shame and guilt. Guilt is something that is related to a particular incident, it’s something doctors can usually get over with, but the shame that ’reflects a failure of one’s entire being’ is much harder to tolerate. Dr. Ofri reflects on one of her mistakes:
’Of course I felt guilty—that was the easy part. I had no trouble with berating myself for the error. But it was the shame that was paralyzing. It was the shame of realizing that I was not who I thought I was, that I was not who I’d been telling my patient and my intern I was. It wasn’t that I was forgetful or momentarily distracted. It was not that I was neglectful or even uncaring. It was that up until that moment, I’d thought I was a competent, even excellent, doctor. In one crashing moment of realization, that persona shattered to bits.’
It is delightful to see, that this century has begun paying attention to relieving the presssures, caused by hospital life, in different kinds of programmes that first and foremost offer peer support (something like talking about your own mistakes has been a totally no-go topic to discuss).
It’s hard to think Finnish health care system would be as harsh towards doctors as the American one described in the book, but the take-home-message that doctors’ mental health is something worth keeping eye on because it is directly projecting to the clinical work, is worth remembering.
November 11, 2024
This was a 3.5/5 for me (rounded up because inflation) and honestly a good read/listen for even those not in the medical field
July 19, 2022
I was browsing through google with "books about doctor's emotions" after I had to break the bad news to a family whose their member just passed away for the very first time in my life. And when the family cried their hearts out my heart skipped a beat that day. I couldn't describe the emotions.
Working in the emergency room for the first time, it has been around two months. Some might've been feeling so-so about the experiences. But not for me, being a doctor wasn't what I wanted at first place when I had just graduated from high school. I had struggled, I had survived through medical schools with blood *literally blood, considering I once fell from my motorbike the night before an exam when I went back home from studying* and tears. I need reasons to stay and keep going. I'm still questioning lot of things, I need to seek the good in what I do, I need to know whether what I'm doing is right or good enough or not.
I'm afraid of being numb from patients' emotions. I'm afraid that I will be blunt and lack of empathy towards my patients. I'm still struggling at how to compartmentalize my feelings. My feelings about my works, and my feelings outside my workline.
This book was eye-opening for me. I long to be a good *what's a good doctor anyway* doctor but also a human, a person who feels. It'll be a long journey indeed. I'll probably look up to this book over and over again in the future, to remind myself that after all a doctor is still a human with feelings and emotions.
Working in the emergency room for the first time, it has been around two months. Some might've been feeling so-so about the experiences. But not for me, being a doctor wasn't what I wanted at first place when I had just graduated from high school. I had struggled, I had survived through medical schools with blood *literally blood, considering I once fell from my motorbike the night before an exam when I went back home from studying* and tears. I need reasons to stay and keep going. I'm still questioning lot of things, I need to seek the good in what I do, I need to know whether what I'm doing is right or good enough or not.
I'm afraid of being numb from patients' emotions. I'm afraid that I will be blunt and lack of empathy towards my patients. I'm still struggling at how to compartmentalize my feelings. My feelings about my works, and my feelings outside my workline.
This book was eye-opening for me. I long to be a good *what's a good doctor anyway* doctor but also a human, a person who feels. It'll be a long journey indeed. I'll probably look up to this book over and over again in the future, to remind myself that after all a doctor is still a human with feelings and emotions.
January 2, 2026
An author that my medical humanities professor had recommended. Just happened to see a used copy of this book in the rather robust “Medical Narratives” section of Powell’s in Portland.
Chapters organized around negative emotions like fear, shame, and disillusionment. The stories are incredible, and it makes me feel that I can arrive at school excited about the future, but realistic about what training and practicing will entail. Even as a medical assistant now, many of the ideas for combatting these feelings are relevant. Sparked a daunting amount of potential topics for journaling. Will definitely reread in a couple years.
Chapters organized around negative emotions like fear, shame, and disillusionment. The stories are incredible, and it makes me feel that I can arrive at school excited about the future, but realistic about what training and practicing will entail. Even as a medical assistant now, many of the ideas for combatting these feelings are relevant. Sparked a daunting amount of potential topics for journaling. Will definitely reread in a couple years.
December 1, 2025
I always find medical books truly intriguing as someone outside the world of healthcare, and this one by Dr. Ofri is no different. It gives a clear look into the cracks of the medical system and the mix of hospital culture and societal expectations that shape it. It’s helpful for both medical professionals and patients, as it explores how emotions such as fear, shame, guilt, empathy, pride, grief and compassion can quietly shape a doctor’s behaviour and affect countless future patients. It’s raw, intimate, and sometimes genuinely heartbreaking to read.
July 15, 2022
A great read around the aspect of medicine that is often hidden and compartmentalized: emotion. The writer brings up the topic of fear, grief, anger, guilt, shame, how it shape decisions made by physicians on a daily basis, how compartmentalizing is not a solution, and what one can do to process these emotions.
January 26, 2023
“… grief offered a perspective on life, and a dosage of humility about the limits of medicine”
Esta casual, siento que no me encanto porque estaba esperando algo groundbreaking. Peroo sí me gusto que habla de la sobreexigencia social que hay hacia los doctores y las implicaciones que tiene en todo el sistema esto. También esta interesante los approaches que pone para manejar las emociones “negativas” y como estas clases también deberían ser parte del currículum médico.
Esta casual, siento que no me encanto porque estaba esperando algo groundbreaking. Peroo sí me gusto que habla de la sobreexigencia social que hay hacia los doctores y las implicaciones que tiene en todo el sistema esto. También esta interesante los approaches que pone para manejar las emociones “negativas” y como estas clases también deberían ser parte del currículum médico.
July 2, 2023
great book about the intricacies of medical decisions. highlights the emotions doctors experience and how those emotions impact their ability to make sound medical decisions. must-read for anyone planning on a career in the medical field!
April 17, 2025
A great exploration on how to balance empathy with objective, sound decision-making as a physician. I hope to circle back to this at some later point in my career.
June 7, 2022
Anyone who has ever been a patient or a doctor should read this book.
November 4, 2024
Poignant, yet beautiful. I have never taken the time to write a review of a book, but I believe this one deserves it. As someone approaching my third year of medical school, I found this book to be immensely important. I am so petrified of the “hidden curriculum of medicine,” and I turned to this book. What I found were some harsh truths, intermixed with things that gave me hope. At the end of the day, what is medicine without compassion?
October 13, 2018
This was recommended by my sister and I think that it's a must read if you are a doctor or thinking of becoming a doctor. It demonstrates the human side of medicine it's really effective and touching. It shows you the doctor's emotions and feelings when they practice medicine, the fears, frustrations and nervousness that they face when performing their duties.
March 28, 2014
The old terminology for how good a doctor was with patients was "bedside manner".
Now, of course, they rarely see you in your own bed...and "hospital bedside manner", "clinic manner", "telephone manner", "videocall manner", and so on are more appropriate.
All of these, though, have talked about how the doctor makes the patient feel.
Very little consideration has been given to how the doctors themselves feel...and how that could impact the care patients receive.
That's the topic of What Doctors Feel by Danielle Ofri...and it's an important one.
Contrary to what a lot of people might want to think, doctors are human beings. :) As such, they have emotions (unless something is seriously wrong), and those emotions affect them...positively and negatively.
The author, a doctor, does a good job of presenting the gut-wrenching things with which doctors deal. Be warned that this is not an easy book to read. You can imagine the horrors that might happen in medicine.
At one point, I considered being a veterinarian. Someone said to me, though, "What are you doing to do if a customer is treating an animal in a way of which you don't approve...but that doesn't rise to the level of illegal animal cruelty?" That put another whole perspective on it.
With doctors, sometimes the issue is how patients are treating themselves, from drug abuse to negligence. It's not just them: it's their families, friends, and "the system".
One of the best points in the book is the sudden jarring switch from a highly-regimented academic life (in which you know exactly what you will be doing at what time of day) to the chaotic, unpredictable life of medical internship and residency (especially in hospitals). The people who are best at medical school may not at all be the people who are best in medical practice...and that has to affect your self-perception.
Shaming is a topic in the book. I think it's important to separate "shame" from "guilt", and that's addressed in the book. "Guilt" is when you feel bad about what you did. "Shame" is when you feel bad about who you are. Doctors are often shamed by the people who should be leading them. It's not, "Did you consider this?" It's, "How could you be so stupid?"
That is, of course, not always true...but may be true too often.
The book is heavily supported with citing studies and providing other sourcing. It will give you a lot to consider, whether you are in healthcare or not.
It won't, however, give you answers, and that can be considered a weakness. While it does provide examples of attempted solutions, and it helps to identify when certain things (such as the loss of empathy and disillusionment) tend to occur, it doesn't tell us what to do about it.
That may be understandable: we may not know.
We also don't see much about how positive emotions help medical care. Oh, we get recognition about how some people do that better, and we get some positive experiences from the author...but generally, the book is geared towards the negative.
One area of emotion about which patients often wonder, and is unaddressed, is dealing with the intimate nature of healthcare. Many laypeople can't imagine seeing "attractive", often healthy people naked and not having it affect their judgement in some way. How does that impact doctors? Do patients flirt with doctors sometimes? One has to imagine they do. How does that affect doctors...and their relationships? It would have been interesting to see that impact weighed.
While I recommend the book, the one other thing I would say is that it does seem in some ways to be substantially put together from previous writings. The author doesn't disguise that, but it can make it feel...reheated.
This is an important book, because it raises issues, and does so in a human way, well-written, and yet supported by documentation. If you can handle the accounts of human tragedy, injustice, and frustration, this is a book you should read.
Now, of course, they rarely see you in your own bed...and "hospital bedside manner", "clinic manner", "telephone manner", "videocall manner", and so on are more appropriate.
All of these, though, have talked about how the doctor makes the patient feel.
Very little consideration has been given to how the doctors themselves feel...and how that could impact the care patients receive.
That's the topic of What Doctors Feel by Danielle Ofri...and it's an important one.
Contrary to what a lot of people might want to think, doctors are human beings. :) As such, they have emotions (unless something is seriously wrong), and those emotions affect them...positively and negatively.
The author, a doctor, does a good job of presenting the gut-wrenching things with which doctors deal. Be warned that this is not an easy book to read. You can imagine the horrors that might happen in medicine.
At one point, I considered being a veterinarian. Someone said to me, though, "What are you doing to do if a customer is treating an animal in a way of which you don't approve...but that doesn't rise to the level of illegal animal cruelty?" That put another whole perspective on it.
With doctors, sometimes the issue is how patients are treating themselves, from drug abuse to negligence. It's not just them: it's their families, friends, and "the system".
One of the best points in the book is the sudden jarring switch from a highly-regimented academic life (in which you know exactly what you will be doing at what time of day) to the chaotic, unpredictable life of medical internship and residency (especially in hospitals). The people who are best at medical school may not at all be the people who are best in medical practice...and that has to affect your self-perception.
Shaming is a topic in the book. I think it's important to separate "shame" from "guilt", and that's addressed in the book. "Guilt" is when you feel bad about what you did. "Shame" is when you feel bad about who you are. Doctors are often shamed by the people who should be leading them. It's not, "Did you consider this?" It's, "How could you be so stupid?"
That is, of course, not always true...but may be true too often.
The book is heavily supported with citing studies and providing other sourcing. It will give you a lot to consider, whether you are in healthcare or not.
It won't, however, give you answers, and that can be considered a weakness. While it does provide examples of attempted solutions, and it helps to identify when certain things (such as the loss of empathy and disillusionment) tend to occur, it doesn't tell us what to do about it.
That may be understandable: we may not know.
We also don't see much about how positive emotions help medical care. Oh, we get recognition about how some people do that better, and we get some positive experiences from the author...but generally, the book is geared towards the negative.
One area of emotion about which patients often wonder, and is unaddressed, is dealing with the intimate nature of healthcare. Many laypeople can't imagine seeing "attractive", often healthy people naked and not having it affect their judgement in some way. How does that impact doctors? Do patients flirt with doctors sometimes? One has to imagine they do. How does that affect doctors...and their relationships? It would have been interesting to see that impact weighed.
While I recommend the book, the one other thing I would say is that it does seem in some ways to be substantially put together from previous writings. The author doesn't disguise that, but it can make it feel...reheated.
This is an important book, because it raises issues, and does so in a human way, well-written, and yet supported by documentation. If you can handle the accounts of human tragedy, injustice, and frustration, this is a book you should read.
April 16, 2017
A remarkably self-revelatory and insightful work.
What are the powerful influences that mold young physicians? Dr. Danielle Ofri’s fourth book is a well-written and accessible attempt to probe the unseen forces, blending well-drawn patient narratives with summaries of the relevant research. A myriad of surprisingly similar experiences shape young doctors on the path that incrementally assigns life-and-death decision making responsibilities. By any objective standard, the one-size-fits-all process through which physicians pass is absurd but as I read What Doctors Feel, I frequently recalled my own training and kept thinking, "Yeah, I've been there. I’ve seen that. That happened to me."
Dr. Ofri lingers on the crushing of empathy. She explores how good and bad role models and the "hidden curriculum” exert pressure to change the young doctors. She explains the common experiences of fear and stress, the widespread yet rarely articulated reactions to death and sadness, and the feelings of shame and guilt that persist after medical errors and "near misses" She worries about the effect of being overwhelmed and burned out. She reports feeling suffocated after being judged harshly.
More than many physician-writers, Dr. Ofri is strikingly honest, finding insight in her own human lapses and failures.
Physicians of all ages will relate to her insights. Patients and families will better understand what makes us who we are.
What are the powerful influences that mold young physicians? Dr. Danielle Ofri’s fourth book is a well-written and accessible attempt to probe the unseen forces, blending well-drawn patient narratives with summaries of the relevant research. A myriad of surprisingly similar experiences shape young doctors on the path that incrementally assigns life-and-death decision making responsibilities. By any objective standard, the one-size-fits-all process through which physicians pass is absurd but as I read What Doctors Feel, I frequently recalled my own training and kept thinking, "Yeah, I've been there. I’ve seen that. That happened to me."
Dr. Ofri lingers on the crushing of empathy. She explores how good and bad role models and the "hidden curriculum” exert pressure to change the young doctors. She explains the common experiences of fear and stress, the widespread yet rarely articulated reactions to death and sadness, and the feelings of shame and guilt that persist after medical errors and "near misses" She worries about the effect of being overwhelmed and burned out. She reports feeling suffocated after being judged harshly.
More than many physician-writers, Dr. Ofri is strikingly honest, finding insight in her own human lapses and failures.
Physicians of all ages will relate to her insights. Patients and families will better understand what makes us who we are.
February 23, 2017
An excellent, insightful and brave book that addresses such issues as physicians' perfectionism, shame, burn-out, substance abuse, feelings in the light of litigation/malpractice suits, as well as doctors' love, compassion for, and grief over the loss of patients. It's a book that deserves to be read by doctors and their patients alike. I wish a similar book were written for educators. Highly recommended...as is almost everything else Ofri writes. Read it.
November 11, 2020
This is an exceptional book! Written by a doctor, a doctor whose patients are very fortunate to have her! An honest, if not brutally so, account of what doctors go through, how they feel, how they diagnose, etc. This one needs to be read by every human being since at some point we will all need a care of a physician and not all physician's are equal!
May 29, 2014
Enjoyed learning some Latin from Dr. Orfi "Aequitas" and "Gaudeamus igitur." Her many stories illuminate the struggles and triumphs of Lab Coat Wearing MD's. Very Informative and conveyed with cadence and humility. Thanks.
August 14, 2018
This book is captivating due to the new perspective it offers. I found it uplifting at times, and depressing at others. Having read it now, I think I will always see the medical profession differently.
December 23, 2018
Another great read by Dr. Ofri! I appreciate her candor and her vulnerability in writing about difficult emotions such as shame, disappointment, and failure. Anyone who works with physicians or offers care to physicians should read Ofri's works!
February 8, 2018
Ofri addresses an important topic, but tells stories in such a self-pitying, annoying, self-justified manner
June 27, 2023
I’m not a doctor, so I’m probably not qualified to accurately comment on this book, but I can tell you with full confidence that I enjoyed it. I may not be able to deliver a diagnosis, but I can write a book review, and that I will do.
I want to be a doctor. I’m not a doctor yet, which you already know, but I’m in the process. I work at a hospital and everything! I just kind of sit there and watch- my music plays and I restock the gowns and masks and gloves and I fill out paperwork and I listen to all of the sounds of a hospital, witness all of its moving parts come together to make a machine. My music isn’t turned up that loud. There’s always a quiet din of sympathy, but it’s hard to find empathy. I hear nurses and doctors complaining, and I complain myself, but I still search for the empathy. Dr. Ofri’s book opened me up to that search, and though I am still left to discover that within myself, I hope that by the time I am a doctor, I will be an empathetic and skilled one capable of creating more than a book review. Her work teaches me that the system is against doctors, against the very people meant to save the system- and this is both the healthcare system and the society of the United States. Our culture frowns upon empathy, especially in but even those who are expected to be the most empathetic. People have been defined by numbers and words that are not their name since before the modern hospital, but when a patient is simply a chart, it becomes difficult to have empathy for the words on the page. Dr. Ofri’s book intends to reverse that. Through the story of Julia, numerous case studies, and the perspectives of doctors who I may or may not now idolize, Dr. Ofri teaches readers to cultivate empathy in everything they do, no matter how little. It’s a time-consuming process, but isn’t everything in the medical world? If doctors fail to have empathy, they have failed at the role that they spent countless hours and dollars preparing for. My takeaway is that this is a book everyone should read, whether doctor, patient, aspiring medical professional, or none of the above. Doctors have feelings too, and when they are taught to suppress them, they are simultaneously taught to ignore those of their patients. Society needs an overhaul, I suppose, but that change is long overdue and the United States seems quite hung up on regression, rather than progress. Point being: you, too, are a part of the medical food chain, and can make a difference in the hierarchy that so adamantly shuts away the feelings of doctors and patients alike. This is a book that will make you sit and contemplate for a long while after you’ve closed its cover for the last time. This is a book that sticks with you, like a dull pain you should probably take to urgent care but instead choose to silence instead. Reflective of the system, perhaps. What should be the first lesson in medical school and instead seems to be one that is glossed over, saved as an optional reading, it to have empathy. Have empathy in everything you do, and you will be rewarded as such. It’s the golden rule- treat others like you want to be treated. If only surgery was this simple, and I’d be a doctor already. But I will say that Dr. Ofri’s book felt as if it brought me a lot closer to that profession, to my hopeful future!
I want to be a doctor. I’m not a doctor yet, which you already know, but I’m in the process. I work at a hospital and everything! I just kind of sit there and watch- my music plays and I restock the gowns and masks and gloves and I fill out paperwork and I listen to all of the sounds of a hospital, witness all of its moving parts come together to make a machine. My music isn’t turned up that loud. There’s always a quiet din of sympathy, but it’s hard to find empathy. I hear nurses and doctors complaining, and I complain myself, but I still search for the empathy. Dr. Ofri’s book opened me up to that search, and though I am still left to discover that within myself, I hope that by the time I am a doctor, I will be an empathetic and skilled one capable of creating more than a book review. Her work teaches me that the system is against doctors, against the very people meant to save the system- and this is both the healthcare system and the society of the United States. Our culture frowns upon empathy, especially in but even those who are expected to be the most empathetic. People have been defined by numbers and words that are not their name since before the modern hospital, but when a patient is simply a chart, it becomes difficult to have empathy for the words on the page. Dr. Ofri’s book intends to reverse that. Through the story of Julia, numerous case studies, and the perspectives of doctors who I may or may not now idolize, Dr. Ofri teaches readers to cultivate empathy in everything they do, no matter how little. It’s a time-consuming process, but isn’t everything in the medical world? If doctors fail to have empathy, they have failed at the role that they spent countless hours and dollars preparing for. My takeaway is that this is a book everyone should read, whether doctor, patient, aspiring medical professional, or none of the above. Doctors have feelings too, and when they are taught to suppress them, they are simultaneously taught to ignore those of their patients. Society needs an overhaul, I suppose, but that change is long overdue and the United States seems quite hung up on regression, rather than progress. Point being: you, too, are a part of the medical food chain, and can make a difference in the hierarchy that so adamantly shuts away the feelings of doctors and patients alike. This is a book that will make you sit and contemplate for a long while after you’ve closed its cover for the last time. This is a book that sticks with you, like a dull pain you should probably take to urgent care but instead choose to silence instead. Reflective of the system, perhaps. What should be the first lesson in medical school and instead seems to be one that is glossed over, saved as an optional reading, it to have empathy. Have empathy in everything you do, and you will be rewarded as such. It’s the golden rule- treat others like you want to be treated. If only surgery was this simple, and I’d be a doctor already. But I will say that Dr. Ofri’s book felt as if it brought me a lot closer to that profession, to my hopeful future!
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