Finding Your Way after the Suicide of Someone You Love by David B. Biebel, Suzanne L. Foster [Zondervan, 2005] (Paperback) [Paperback]

by David B. Biebel

Finding Your Way after the Suicide of Someone You Love by David B. Biebel, Su...

Genres: Grief, Reference

Paperback

First published August 30, 2009

Reviews

[Rob · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is so helpful in recovering from the devastating tragedy of suicide. I previously understood the bereavement process as linear, but these authors have a better analogy: a spiral staircase where one revisits the loss from different vantage points, going from an emotional to a cognitive experience of what happened. This book lights the way after a loved one's suicide, describing what to expect, how to grieve, and how to heal. Relationships will change. Some people won't understand and will say terrible things. Survivors of suicide will wrestle with guilt, grief, anxiety, depression, anger, sadness, and other challenges. These feelings of loss may recur. But the authors give strategies for coping and ways to get help, including counseling and support groups. There is hope after suicide.

The book makes a decent attempt at handling suicide from a Christian perspective and tries to lessen theological concerns about the consequences of suicide. But it would be helpful even for non-Christians. It was sad but not surprising to see anecdotes recounting negative and insensitive statements from (supposed) Christians in response to suicide. Weep with those who weep. Don't wound. Offer help and let people grieve. Don't explain.

A warning: This book will reopen wounds and restart the bereavement process. Use coping skills and talk about your feelings with someone you trust, someone who can support you as you heal further. Do not keep this to yourself.

[Beau · Rating 3 out of 5]

Overall I found the book to be encouraging. I especially appreciated learning that I wasn't alone in many respects.

I was looking forward to their chapter dealing with some of the theological questions regarding suicide but was disappointed. The authors are not trained theologians and make a couple of mistakes with regard to historical theology. But there was still some food for thought from that chapter.

Anyway, I recommend this book. There's not much out there in this category, and the authors do a good job covering many of concerns for survivors.

[Carrie Ann · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this book very helpful - it offers many practical way for the survivor to move forward in their grief. I read this book after one of my former viola students took his life - I was also close friends with his family, so he felt like a nephew, but i know my grief is nowhere near what his parents are going through right now, so I really appreciated the insights this book gave in the journey they are and will be going through, and some suggestions for what to do or say or what to avoid to be the best support for them. This book was also very rooted in faith in Jesus and the Bible.

[Victoria Myers · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book meant a lot to me. It was probably the second most helpful resource I found on suicide loss. What stood out was how well it blended personal experience with practical insight. David Biebel—who I’ve come to really appreciate as an author—co-wrote it with Suzanne Foster, a counselor who lost her daughter to suicide. It provides insights on handling guilt, understanding the role of depression, dealing with questions of faith and meaning, and creating a support system. Together, they speak to both the emotional chaos and the deep questions that come with this kind of loss.

[Nicole O'Brien · Rating 3 out of 5]

I appreciate this offer as there is not much out there on this subject. The personal scenarios were helpful to read and some of them were relatable. I found the association of the grief process to a spiral staircase applicable, however I felt that many theories were off and there was not much in regards to tangible tips on moving forward.

[Denise Meine-Graham · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this about 2 months into my grieving and was very impacted by it. I appreciated the blurbs included throughout the book by other suicide loss survivors.

[Candice Stephens]

The right book to help heal my heart.

[Jess · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very deep and hefty in content. I needed to take breaks at some points. But very good and well written. It provided me much comfort.

[Sarah Reddington · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book wasn't specific about how to move forward with grief. This book is definitely best suited for people who follow Christianity.

[Tim Gillen · Rating 3 out of 5]

I discovered this book following my father's suicide. It is written from a religious perspective, and while I found this comforting on many levels, there were a few instances where the comfort given could come off as trite.