Alles over liefde

by Lisa Appignanesi

Unruly, unpredictable love is a maddening deity. In this insightful and eloquent meditation on that many-splendored thing, Lisa Appignanesi draws together psychology, literature, popular culture, and her own experiences in order to tangle with love's paradoxes across the span of our lives. Beginning with the rose-tinted raptures of first love, she proceeds to love in marriage, triangulated love, jealousy and adultery, love in the family, and friendship. By illuminating the expectations, the joys and difficulties, and the cultural undercurrents that accompany each stage, Appignanesi raises provocative questions about love in the twenty-first century: Has the unbinding of obstacles to love emptied it of meaning? Do our desires for variety and experimentation result in increased anxiety? What gains and losses have come from greater openness and equality and the burgeoning sphere of virtual fantasy? As rewarding as it is captivating, All about Love will leave you a little wiser about the emotion that rules our lives.

Genres: Nonfiction, Psychology, Love, Cultural, Philosophy

Kindle Edition

First published January 1, 2011

About the author

aka Jessica Ayre

Elżbieta Borensztejn was born on 4 January 1946 in Łódź, Poland, the daughter of Hena and Aaron Borensztejn with Jewish origin. Following her birth, her parents moved to Paris, France, and in 1951 they emigrating to Canada. She grew up in the province of Quebec - first in a small Laurentian town, subsequently in Montreal.

She graduated from McGill University with a B.A. degree in 1966 and her M.A. the following year. During 1970-71 she was a staff writer for the Centre for Community Research in New York City and is a former University of Essex lecturer in European Studies. She was a founding member and editorial director of the Writers and Readers Publishing Cooperative. Through the eighties she was a Deputy Director of the Institute of Contemporary Arts in London, UK, for whom she also edited the seminal Documents Series and established ICA television and the video Writers in Conversation series.

She produced several made for television films and had written a number of books before devoting herself to writing fulltime in 1990. In recognition of her contribution to literature, Lisa Appignanesi has been honoured with a Chevalier of the Ordre des Arts et des Lettres from the French government. In 2004, she became Deputy President of English PEN and has run its highly successful 'Free Expression is No Offence Campaign' against the Racial and Religious Hatred Bill. In 2008 she became President of English PEN. She writes for The Guardian, The Independent and has made several series for BBC Radio 4, as well as frequently appearing as a cultural commentator.

In 1967, she married Richard Appignanesi, another writer, with whom she had one son in 1975, Josh Appignanesi, a film director. They divorced in 1984. With her life partner John Forrester, she had a daugther, Katrina Forrester, a Research Fellow in the history of modern political thought at St John's College, Cambridge. She lives in London.

Reviews

[Fuschia · Rating 3 out of 5]

6/10, some good nuggets but buried in numerous examples in literature. I think it would have been more effective (and pleasant to read) if edited down a bit. But a lot of really great points were made and I'm left with several interesting things to ponder.

[Stephen Jennings · Rating 2 out of 5]

Over reliant on quotes in my opinion. The strongest parts were the biographical/autobiographical sections but unfortunately these were too few and far between. Quotes and references to literature should be there to back up the argument not swamp it.

[Stephen Batty · Rating 5 out of 5]

Make no mistake this book is about life, the whole existence. It melds philisophy, psychology, folklore, and reports from the street. The fact that it focuses on Love is coincidental - where the word coincidental has two meanings, one is pure chance, perhaps events and processes beyond man's understanding? or, the other mean, balance, where everything comes together in harmony!
Like 👍 Hanif Kureshi on the cover, who Loves it... me too. Even though the jury is still out deliberating...

[Theresa Clare · Rating 2 out of 5]

I am unimpressed by this. It is primarily made up of the author quoting other works, and then not delving into or critiquing them in any significant way.

[Sien Van Hoorebeeck · Rating 2 out of 5]

heb er heeeeeel lang over gedaan, want was mega langdradig. sommige stukjes pakten mn aandacht, maar werden daarna terug uitgemolken

[Zainab Zaidi · Rating 5 out of 5]

very informative.. good read!

[KarnagesMistress]

"I'll believe in evolutionary psychology more, perhaps, when it's used less as an explanation for male philandering and female nesting. These natural men and women, after all, don't still shit in their back gardens." p. 17
_____
"The demands that marriage now had to meet were very exacting indeed. All the goods of earthly paradise had become bound up in a single social institution predicated on fulfilling unruly sexual and romantic dreams as well as the high callings of friendship and self-realization. All this for both parties, and through the birth and rearing of those dangerous rivals children, and their children-- and all this faithfully and for ever. Disappointment and worse was inevitably at hand." p.172
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It is heartening to think that at least some of our idealistic young have a will to make the underpinning of love reside in that first principle of doing no harm to others, rather than in the carpe diem of instant gratification." p.260
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"Love, after all, is more of an art than a rigorous production line with targets in place at each step of the way." p.290
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If the pursuit of happiness has made a great many unhappy, it may be that what we have pinpointed as happiness and the good life is simply mistaken." p.341

[de vangsten · Rating 2 out of 5]

Wel niet alles gelezen.

Zoals ik in een recensie las (in De Standaard dacht ik): enerzijds wil je er je notitieboekje bijnemen, anderszijds is het zo.veel.

Beetje te veel jammer genoeg.