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Laid Bare
LAID BARE is Jesse Fink’s startlingly honest, deeply personal account of emotional and mental oblivion after divorce, interwoven with his experiences as an accidental ‘player’ in a world where dating is a blood sport and finding a true connection is harder than ever because of the distractions provided by technology.
It doesn’t shy away from self-exposition, discussion of taboo subjects and what men really think about women, marriage and relationships.
But at the heart of this extraordinary book is how Fink, then a single father whose personal and professional life was falling apart, maintained and repaired his relationship with his now-teenage daughter, Evie.
LAID BARE is one man’s view of love as he tries to figure out what it all means while searching for ‘The One’.
‘X-rated, honest and compelling, this is a must-read.’
MEN'S HEALTH
‘A great read. Go out there and get it, especially if you are a newly single dad as well. It might teach you a thing or two about what to do and what not to do.’
DAVID CAMPBELL
‘If you’ve had your heart broken/been on the dating scene/had sex, read Laid Bare. Unputdownable.’
KERRI SACKVILLE
'An unputdownable read. Essential for every man, post separation, nearing separation, in the event of separation, or just anyone who wants the warts and all insights into an unpredictable voyage you never knew you needed before you could come out the other side. Women who want to understand the male psyche should also read this book. For me, it was astonishingly close to the bone from what I hear from men so frequently. If you're up for honesty, rawness and real life, get yourself a copy.'
JASMIN NEWMAN, SEX & RELATIONSHIPS COACH, RELATING TO MEN
‘An extraordinary depiction of how sex, even too much sex, can be a normal and healthy part of coping and grief in the life of a man.’
DR DAVID LEY, AUTHOR, THE MYTH OF SEX ADDICTION
‘An excellent writer and storyteller … compelling reading. Fink’s honesty is admirable, his story bittersweet and his experiences will make the reader squirm.’
DAILY TELEGRAPH
‘One notable exception [to the string of unsatisfying books and articles about sex in the digital age] was Jesse Fink’s harrowing memoir, Laid Bare, in which he chronicled his sex-addled online dating adventures as a newly single father. The difference was Fink readily admitted he behaved as a ruthless cad towards the women he met and his self-loathing gave his book an authenticity sorely lacking in similar works.’
SYDNEY MORNING HERALD
‘A balls-and-all account of a bloke using extreme physical activity to try to mend a broken heart. Fink opens his deep wounds for inspection, his engaging style pitch perfect to document both his foolhardy actions and his extreme vulnerability.’
TOWNSVILLE BULLETIN
‘Like Penthouse Letters with post-orgasmic guilt … one man’s journey into the “gratification now” of the internet while slowly accepting his complicity in his divorce, before his sanity is salvaged by the unconditional love of his daughter. An engrossing read.’
HERALD SUN
‘A great book.’
PENTHOUSE
‘Fink’s brutally honest, tell-all memoir about his adventures in online dating is worth reading as much for his personal journey from committed family man to ruthless cad to devoted dad as for the missives it issues from the frontlines of modern love … Laid Bare doesn’t just chronicle Fink’s post-divorce “festival of sexual bounty”, but also offers some incisive commentary on modern life – including the observation that there are serious pitfalls to having too much choice.’
THE DRUM (ABC)
‘Laid Bare might be a story of the apocalypse of and after divorce, but it’s still applicable to the broader male experience, especially as modern man sinks further into the Internet Age.’
CAIRNS POST
It doesn’t shy away from self-exposition, discussion of taboo subjects and what men really think about women, marriage and relationships.
But at the heart of this extraordinary book is how Fink, then a single father whose personal and professional life was falling apart, maintained and repaired his relationship with his now-teenage daughter, Evie.
LAID BARE is one man’s view of love as he tries to figure out what it all means while searching for ‘The One’.
‘X-rated, honest and compelling, this is a must-read.’
MEN'S HEALTH
‘A great read. Go out there and get it, especially if you are a newly single dad as well. It might teach you a thing or two about what to do and what not to do.’
DAVID CAMPBELL
‘If you’ve had your heart broken/been on the dating scene/had sex, read Laid Bare. Unputdownable.’
KERRI SACKVILLE
'An unputdownable read. Essential for every man, post separation, nearing separation, in the event of separation, or just anyone who wants the warts and all insights into an unpredictable voyage you never knew you needed before you could come out the other side. Women who want to understand the male psyche should also read this book. For me, it was astonishingly close to the bone from what I hear from men so frequently. If you're up for honesty, rawness and real life, get yourself a copy.'
JASMIN NEWMAN, SEX & RELATIONSHIPS COACH, RELATING TO MEN
‘An extraordinary depiction of how sex, even too much sex, can be a normal and healthy part of coping and grief in the life of a man.’
DR DAVID LEY, AUTHOR, THE MYTH OF SEX ADDICTION
‘An excellent writer and storyteller … compelling reading. Fink’s honesty is admirable, his story bittersweet and his experiences will make the reader squirm.’
DAILY TELEGRAPH
‘One notable exception [to the string of unsatisfying books and articles about sex in the digital age] was Jesse Fink’s harrowing memoir, Laid Bare, in which he chronicled his sex-addled online dating adventures as a newly single father. The difference was Fink readily admitted he behaved as a ruthless cad towards the women he met and his self-loathing gave his book an authenticity sorely lacking in similar works.’
SYDNEY MORNING HERALD
‘A balls-and-all account of a bloke using extreme physical activity to try to mend a broken heart. Fink opens his deep wounds for inspection, his engaging style pitch perfect to document both his foolhardy actions and his extreme vulnerability.’
TOWNSVILLE BULLETIN
‘Like Penthouse Letters with post-orgasmic guilt … one man’s journey into the “gratification now” of the internet while slowly accepting his complicity in his divorce, before his sanity is salvaged by the unconditional love of his daughter. An engrossing read.’
HERALD SUN
‘A great book.’
PENTHOUSE
‘Fink’s brutally honest, tell-all memoir about his adventures in online dating is worth reading as much for his personal journey from committed family man to ruthless cad to devoted dad as for the missives it issues from the frontlines of modern love … Laid Bare doesn’t just chronicle Fink’s post-divorce “festival of sexual bounty”, but also offers some incisive commentary on modern life – including the observation that there are serious pitfalls to having too much choice.’
THE DRUM (ABC)
‘Laid Bare might be a story of the apocalypse of and after divorce, but it’s still applicable to the broader male experience, especially as modern man sinks further into the Internet Age.’
CAIRNS POST
320 pages, Paperback
First published September 1, 2012
8 people are currently reading
523 people want to read
About the author
Jesse Fink
7 books112 followersJesse Fink was born in London in 1973. He is the author of six books including The Eagle in the Mirror, Pure Narco, Bon: The Last Highway and The Youngs: The Brothers Who Built AC/DC. Visit his official website at jessefinkbooks.com
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 39 reviews
August 23, 2017
(3.5 stars out of 5 stars) This was an honest, gritty and revealing look into one Australian man's work to rebuild his life and self after a painful divorce. He shares his battle with OCD, how social media has changed dating and expectations, and how and how he's trying to rebuild his relationship with his daughter Evie. There is also the graphic retelling of sexual encounters in parts of it. Worth the time. I was provided an ARC of this book for review by NetGalley, Xoum Publishing, and the author.
May 31, 2017
Wow, talk about REAL, this book is real and not for the faint of heart. The author speaks in a manner easily comprehend describing situations with graphic detail. It's real life so there is very much shall we call "taboo" topics completely conveyed with a conviction of someone who has obviously experienced this stuff.
I highly recommend you give this book a read. It's as real as it gets and gets five stars by my standards. This book put Jesse Fink in my life, lol. I know it sounds weird but gives it a read, I dare ya!
I highly recommend you give this book a read. It's as real as it gets and gets five stars by my standards. This book put Jesse Fink in my life, lol. I know it sounds weird but gives it a read, I dare ya!
January 3, 2014
Jesse Fink tells the story of an Australian bloke in his 30’s, divorced, with a young child. He finds himself back on the scene, seeking solace in dating and sex as he tries to deal with the mental anguish of separation, depression and an obsessive compulsive disorder. Laid Bare is also an account of his family life, his attempts to reconcile with his Ex and his love for his young daughter.
Laid Bare is confronting and graphic.
“I’d drive up and down the coast, sometimes for six-hour round trips, to bang single mothers on kitchen benches”
And
“I performed this sleazy charade so often that I was able to decipher the code in a woman’s profile and determine before I had met her how easy it would be to get her in the sack…."
That’s a couple of tame bits.
Laid Bare busts down the myths of love, romance and sex in the internet era and is a brutally honest account of online dating. However, this book does not descend into a pornographic or erotic account of Fink’s sex life. Instead it is an honest reflection on his experience of love life as a modern man.
The book is easy to read. A couple of days at the beach was what it took. However, not being a widely read, cultured kind of guy, I found myself reaching for the iPhone at times to look up some of the social references that I did not understand (yep, I have no idea who John Irving is).
Is it a self help book ? Not really. Fink tells his story well, analyses the experiences and offers his opinions on love, marriage, dating, relationships. And, when it all turns to crap, discusses how guys should ‘move on’. For men, the ‘self help’ coming out of Laid Bare is knowing that our emotional feelings are commonplace and gaining some insights into women’s minds. Fink probably has a better appreciation of modern relationships that most therapists and marriage guidance counsellors.
Fink’s experiences resonated with me, a 40 something divorced dad who has gone through a few botched relationships, was heartbroken by “The One” and has suffered the torment of depression.
Who should read this book ? Typically men in their 30s and 40s will be able to relate to it well, whether happily married or divorced – it does not matter. Women who want to understand the modern man could also benefit from reading this book.
It’s not to say that readers will like what they read – its ugly and confronting at times. But if you appreciate honesty and truth, including sly and humorous commentary on modern social trends, then I would highly recommend Laid Bare.
Laid Bare is confronting and graphic.
“I’d drive up and down the coast, sometimes for six-hour round trips, to bang single mothers on kitchen benches”
And
“I performed this sleazy charade so often that I was able to decipher the code in a woman’s profile and determine before I had met her how easy it would be to get her in the sack…."
That’s a couple of tame bits.
Laid Bare busts down the myths of love, romance and sex in the internet era and is a brutally honest account of online dating. However, this book does not descend into a pornographic or erotic account of Fink’s sex life. Instead it is an honest reflection on his experience of love life as a modern man.
The book is easy to read. A couple of days at the beach was what it took. However, not being a widely read, cultured kind of guy, I found myself reaching for the iPhone at times to look up some of the social references that I did not understand (yep, I have no idea who John Irving is).
Is it a self help book ? Not really. Fink tells his story well, analyses the experiences and offers his opinions on love, marriage, dating, relationships. And, when it all turns to crap, discusses how guys should ‘move on’. For men, the ‘self help’ coming out of Laid Bare is knowing that our emotional feelings are commonplace and gaining some insights into women’s minds. Fink probably has a better appreciation of modern relationships that most therapists and marriage guidance counsellors.
Fink’s experiences resonated with me, a 40 something divorced dad who has gone through a few botched relationships, was heartbroken by “The One” and has suffered the torment of depression.
Who should read this book ? Typically men in their 30s and 40s will be able to relate to it well, whether happily married or divorced – it does not matter. Women who want to understand the modern man could also benefit from reading this book.
It’s not to say that readers will like what they read – its ugly and confronting at times. But if you appreciate honesty and truth, including sly and humorous commentary on modern social trends, then I would highly recommend Laid Bare.
June 4, 2017
A great read from Jesse Fink... Honest and gritty in a good way... Read it in 3 days!
October 10, 2023
A complete masterpiece on how to survive a painful gut wrenching divorce. Jesse is 10 times more effective than any therapist/psychologist in describing and making his way out of the desperation and despair. This is a life saving book that everyone should read woman or man who needs the empathy and support while going through this life event and also what it is like navigating through the dating scene using online dating websites. I am a retired mental health counselor and I would have given this book to all of my patients to read as an adjunct to therapy. For all those going through the same nightmare, please read this book, and emerge from this crisis as Jesse did as a better man, father, and successful writer. 1 million stars to this talented and beautiful soul of a writer.
May 14, 2020
Picked it up , and read it one day. We can all identify with many expects of this incredible story . Well written.
February 21, 2015
I have just finished reading Jesse Fink’s book “Laid Bare”. The blurb on the cover of the book, “Raw as hell. Love is an open scar”, did nothing to prepare me for the journey I was about to go on.
The opening page hit me full on, like opening a door and being assaulted by the noise of a loud punk band. The protagonist is describing a sex scene almost in a stream of consciousness. But the reader is quickly given context and so begins a remarkably frank and confronting story of a man pushed to the limits of sanity by the sudden and unexpected break up of his marriage. A recurring theme of “As love is an emotional glimpse of eternity, one can’t help half-believing love will last forever” is used to drive the author into finding love at any cost – with a proviso that no matter what, his love for his child must not be lost.
The author shares vivid details of his sex life, but more importantly, the reader is allowed into the head of someone suffering from a serious case of OCD, and into a gut wrenching emotional slide of someone who wants his perfect family back but has to finally accept that it is not going to happen. The story screams along at full tilt as lessons are learnt and forgotten; but during this wild ride epiphanies are realized and shared.
The book is confronting and unusually blunt in putting forward the male perspective. But what inspired me was the author’s determination to find love, his “glimpse of eternity”, while confronting and accepting that he has an illness of the mind for which there should be nothing to be ashamed of or to feel guilt for. I gave the book 4.5 stars out of 5.A courageous, no holds barred look at life.
.
The opening page hit me full on, like opening a door and being assaulted by the noise of a loud punk band. The protagonist is describing a sex scene almost in a stream of consciousness. But the reader is quickly given context and so begins a remarkably frank and confronting story of a man pushed to the limits of sanity by the sudden and unexpected break up of his marriage. A recurring theme of “As love is an emotional glimpse of eternity, one can’t help half-believing love will last forever” is used to drive the author into finding love at any cost – with a proviso that no matter what, his love for his child must not be lost.
The author shares vivid details of his sex life, but more importantly, the reader is allowed into the head of someone suffering from a serious case of OCD, and into a gut wrenching emotional slide of someone who wants his perfect family back but has to finally accept that it is not going to happen. The story screams along at full tilt as lessons are learnt and forgotten; but during this wild ride epiphanies are realized and shared.
The book is confronting and unusually blunt in putting forward the male perspective. But what inspired me was the author’s determination to find love, his “glimpse of eternity”, while confronting and accepting that he has an illness of the mind for which there should be nothing to be ashamed of or to feel guilt for. I gave the book 4.5 stars out of 5.A courageous, no holds barred look at life.
.
February 20, 2015
I thought this book would be utterly depressing - that I was mad to enter a seedy world that would take me back to my own dark divorce days. My preconceived notion of this book as a woman, was that it would disgust or disgrace me. And yep, the first few pages shocked me. Sexually explicit - to draw you into the desperation, then slowly the substance of Fink emerges showing you a man who is hurting, searching (desperately) to be loved. But the writing is good, and upbeat; offering hope in the most soul-destroying and challenging of scenes. Fink has an easy manner to his writing – it’s palatable even when you’re cringing at his behaviour (not a book for the bookshelf if you have young kids). But his insights into the world of dating after divorce (do I really need to look like a super model to hold a man’s interests long-term?) are like a fish-slap to the face. The book shows Fink’s worldliness, his insights into our damaged souls that still keep yearning for love, no matter how many heart-breaks we might face. I had to put the book down several times just to think. About my own failed marriage. My future. My faults. My hurts. My hesitation to take a chance again. Fink’s writing is in your face - at times challenging, the depictions desperate, naïve, heart breaking, bitter-sweet. Real. Honest. No matter what stage of heart-break or healing you’re at, this book pushes you through to the next stage.
December 9, 2014
I read the book in one sitting. This heartbreaking story presents the author's point of view so well it is impossible to detach from it. A story of a period in a man's life about something that could really happen to any of us. At times I felt almost depressed by the author's cynical assessment of human relationships, but as he explains his background in the book, one can hardly fault him for having such a perspective.
The honesty with which the author writes causes the reader to connect with him instantly. During the course of the book the story takes on different turns for the worse or for the better, or even worse still, the writing itself being so good that you go through a wide range of emotions with the author, the tragic protagonist. His daughter is an admirable person, serving her father as the last contact with sanity while he is dividing his time between her, sexual escapades, and work. And while the whole book is about the author trying to find "the glimpse of eternity" with another woman after the first love of his life denied it to him, his daughter is ultimately the one that rescues him from himself
The book asks important questions about the future of human relationships, love in particular, but as everything important these days, the questions will most probably be shrugged off by the people who should be thinking about them the most.
The honesty with which the author writes causes the reader to connect with him instantly. During the course of the book the story takes on different turns for the worse or for the better, or even worse still, the writing itself being so good that you go through a wide range of emotions with the author, the tragic protagonist. His daughter is an admirable person, serving her father as the last contact with sanity while he is dividing his time between her, sexual escapades, and work. And while the whole book is about the author trying to find "the glimpse of eternity" with another woman after the first love of his life denied it to him, his daughter is ultimately the one that rescues him from himself
The book asks important questions about the future of human relationships, love in particular, but as everything important these days, the questions will most probably be shrugged off by the people who should be thinking about them the most.
May 25, 2017
For those who expect this book to be anything like "The Youngs", leave that expectation at the door. "Laid Bare" is a raw, deeply introspective work that at times is far from pretty, but ultimately is full of hope and promise.
The title really says it all: there are moments of the author's life that lesser writers wouldn't consider sharing: dark and seedy at times, painful and angst-ridden at others, but all are shared with honesty and humility.
Anyone who has suffered the loss of a relationship, whatever the circumstances may be, and has tried to navigate what often seems like a whole new world will gain something from reading "Laid Bare". There's no roadmap for recovering from losing the love of your life and trying to fill that ugly, gaping hole in your heart. You just have to go through it and try it make it to the other side with your sanity and your soul intact.
A final thought: if you read this book and are able to grasp the idea of what a "glimpse" is, as the author threads the term throughout the narrative, you will truly have understood what this book is all about.
The title really says it all: there are moments of the author's life that lesser writers wouldn't consider sharing: dark and seedy at times, painful and angst-ridden at others, but all are shared with honesty and humility.
Anyone who has suffered the loss of a relationship, whatever the circumstances may be, and has tried to navigate what often seems like a whole new world will gain something from reading "Laid Bare". There's no roadmap for recovering from losing the love of your life and trying to fill that ugly, gaping hole in your heart. You just have to go through it and try it make it to the other side with your sanity and your soul intact.
A final thought: if you read this book and are able to grasp the idea of what a "glimpse" is, as the author threads the term throughout the narrative, you will truly have understood what this book is all about.
August 4, 2017
I got an advance copy for review from Netgalley.com
I was aware of Fink from reading his great bio "The Youngs," about the 3 brothers who created and ran the rock juggernaut that was AC/DC. He's also quite active here on Goodreads.
Laid Bare was a sad tale of a man trying to reclaim himself after the devastating breakup of his marriage. Fink had lots of sex, lots of regrets, and no small amount of growth during the rough recovery post-divorce. He finally realized that he needed to be better, for himself and his growing daughter Evie.
I was very moved, and learned a lot about middle aged men (which is my own peer group, as I continually search for my One). I would like to have heard more about the woman he met subsequent to getting himself together (and whom Fink ultimately married), but I presume that's for the NEXT memoir...
I was aware of Fink from reading his great bio "The Youngs," about the 3 brothers who created and ran the rock juggernaut that was AC/DC. He's also quite active here on Goodreads.
Laid Bare was a sad tale of a man trying to reclaim himself after the devastating breakup of his marriage. Fink had lots of sex, lots of regrets, and no small amount of growth during the rough recovery post-divorce. He finally realized that he needed to be better, for himself and his growing daughter Evie.
I was very moved, and learned a lot about middle aged men (which is my own peer group, as I continually search for my One). I would like to have heard more about the woman he met subsequent to getting himself together (and whom Fink ultimately married), but I presume that's for the NEXT memoir...
May 13, 2020
I couldn’t wait to read it when i received it! I’d heard mixed reviews from friends that had read it. I started reading it and could not put it down! I did not want to finish reading it either. The book had the WOW! factor. For a writer let alone anyone to open up and be as harsh and realistic as Jesse was about himself shows the courage he has within himself. I laughed, I cried, throughout reading it. I loved it cause it showed that no matter what people in this world struggle with and we are only human and it was real! Something that is hard to find these days.
June 22, 2020
I really enjoyed this book a lot.
I just wanted to read another chapter. Then another.
Going through some of my own personal issues, it was a comforting feeling relating and realising I am not the only person who's been through the pain of separation both physically and mentally.
It was just a shame I was using someone else's pain and suffering in comparison to my own.
Highly recommend
I just wanted to read another chapter. Then another.
Going through some of my own personal issues, it was a comforting feeling relating and realising I am not the only person who's been through the pain of separation both physically and mentally.
It was just a shame I was using someone else's pain and suffering in comparison to my own.
Highly recommend
June 2, 2017
a must read, this Laid Bare book is the cutting edge, its a awesome book,
May 13, 2020
Love Jesse's honesty and vulnerability. Such an extraordinary writer....great book!
September 26, 2017
interesting take on the subject.
not at all what i was expecting
overall a great book
gritty and surprisingly pulling
had to finish it in one sitting
not at all what i was expecting
overall a great book
gritty and surprisingly pulling
had to finish it in one sitting
October 8, 2014
I loved this heartfelt and painfully honest account of how a guy deals with the break up of a marriage he thought would last forever.
What impressed me most were his frank admissions about how men see women and the world very much in terms of sex and attraction. Instead of dismissing this as superficial and sexist, and being offended, I found what he said and how he said it refreshing and sobering. Better to know that many/most men see the world like this, than to fall for the rubbishy plastic superficial fantasy stuff in "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Despite the mostly depressing outcomes of his serial promiscuity and sex addiction, he clearly achieved a lot of emotional wisdom, insight and resilience along the way, and retained an impressive degree of optimism and perspective about the eternal search for a soul mate, that we all have been on at one stage in our lives.
What impressed me most were his frank admissions about how men see women and the world very much in terms of sex and attraction. Instead of dismissing this as superficial and sexist, and being offended, I found what he said and how he said it refreshing and sobering. Better to know that many/most men see the world like this, than to fall for the rubbishy plastic superficial fantasy stuff in "Fifty Shades of Grey".
Despite the mostly depressing outcomes of his serial promiscuity and sex addiction, he clearly achieved a lot of emotional wisdom, insight and resilience along the way, and retained an impressive degree of optimism and perspective about the eternal search for a soul mate, that we all have been on at one stage in our lives.
December 31, 2015
WOW! What can I say except that I could not put it down! It is so raw and relatable for anyone who has lost the love of their life and has to move forward with the feelings of pain, rejection and a glimmer of hope, yet to suffer the harshness of the dating world. I teared up at times and laughed out loud at the accurate descriptions of online dating, and honestly at times was very turned on at descriptions of dating new people and the sexual addiction it can bring you to. Mr. Fink makes you feel that you know him and one can truly relate to the dating adventures he went through. I'm going to read it again, and as soon as it is in print in the U.S., will buy many copies for friends that I KNOW will appreciate the experiences in this book.
February 2, 2013
Got this book from the ex for Christmas
the only reason i put it down was so it would last longer ...
I thoroughly enjoyed the read as it resonated the primal within me as some of his thoughts are way too common but scarcely said out loud
This doesnt make them wrong but the written truth is confronting
Recommend to all .....
the only reason i put it down was so it would last longer ...
I thoroughly enjoyed the read as it resonated the primal within me as some of his thoughts are way too common but scarcely said out loud
This doesnt make them wrong but the written truth is confronting
Recommend to all .....
February 2, 2014
Impressive in more ways than one. The way that the author puts himself out there and share what he went through is a rare find these days.
Don't be mistaken to think that this is a book about the wonderful (and twisted) world of online dating. It's not... It's the journey of a heart broken man and his honesty going through what most of us have.
Where he managed to end up is inspirational..
Don't be mistaken to think that this is a book about the wonderful (and twisted) world of online dating. It's not... It's the journey of a heart broken man and his honesty going through what most of us have.
Where he managed to end up is inspirational..
April 22, 2018
a great read if I may say, it opens your eyes to the world and it's all because it does not shy away from taboos and those quotes I highlighted on the book *-*
here I'll share some of my favs with you :
where their's beauty their's complication.
the player would be outplayed.
why do men seek out beautiful women when they cause so much heartache?
here I'll share some of my favs with you :
where their's beauty their's complication.
the player would be outplayed.
why do men seek out beautiful women when they cause so much heartache?
December 15, 2013
A fantastically descriptive insight into the turmoils and heartache of seperation and divorce. How one man, plagued by mental illness, must maintain a healthy facade while battling with an insatiable loneliness. A wonderful read.
August 31, 2013
Brilliant insights into the psychology of a heartbroken man who hits the internet dating scene with a vengeance. Many men will relate, many women will find it confronting, but it is a must read for anyone single in this online era.
December 15, 2020
One of the most honest memoirs I've read. I can relate being a single person living in a big city like Sydney.
February 25, 2021
There's the old saying that insanity is repetition with the unrealistic expectation of different results. Something like that.
And that's what Jesse Fink's account of his journey through the post-divorce onlinr dating world was like. He'd invest excess emotion into a process which seemed to drain emotion away.
An evidently handsome man, attractive to beautiful and intriguing women, his inability to transform that attraction into the relationship he craved to replace his broken marriage became a little pathetic after reading so many repetitious episodes.
It became frustrating to read about and harder to sympathise his Fink's real frustration in living that life.
Every reviewer comments on the 'raw gritty' aspects of Fink's writing of the sex that saturates the book. But it's the more reflective passages that lie between the episodes of the failed short-term relationships that make the book enjoyable enough.
Find has done a lot of reading of classy literature and its influence comes through in some beautifully constructed sentences and paragraphs.
And that's what Jesse Fink's account of his journey through the post-divorce onlinr dating world was like. He'd invest excess emotion into a process which seemed to drain emotion away.
An evidently handsome man, attractive to beautiful and intriguing women, his inability to transform that attraction into the relationship he craved to replace his broken marriage became a little pathetic after reading so many repetitious episodes.
It became frustrating to read about and harder to sympathise his Fink's real frustration in living that life.
Every reviewer comments on the 'raw gritty' aspects of Fink's writing of the sex that saturates the book. But it's the more reflective passages that lie between the episodes of the failed short-term relationships that make the book enjoyable enough.
Find has done a lot of reading of classy literature and its influence comes through in some beautifully constructed sentences and paragraphs.
June 30, 2017
What a fabulous read!
I thoroughly enjoyed it from the opening paragraph to the last.
Sexy, brutally honest, funny and sad (often at the same time), and REAL. I could relate strongly to many of the incidents. I have either experienced them myself or witnessed close friends go through them.
the crazy-beautifuls, the users, the risky, the easy, the manipulators, the incompatibles, the true loves, and the passionate desires and the ones you want to run from.
I highly recommend it to any man navigating the post-separation nightmare in a modern western society, and to women who truly love and support men in this crisis. and for the rest of you, who just enjoy a damn goodread.
Hope and laughter lie within these pages.
I thoroughly enjoyed it from the opening paragraph to the last.
Sexy, brutally honest, funny and sad (often at the same time), and REAL. I could relate strongly to many of the incidents. I have either experienced them myself or witnessed close friends go through them.
the crazy-beautifuls, the users, the risky, the easy, the manipulators, the incompatibles, the true loves, and the passionate desires and the ones you want to run from.
I highly recommend it to any man navigating the post-separation nightmare in a modern western society, and to women who truly love and support men in this crisis. and for the rest of you, who just enjoy a damn goodread.
Hope and laughter lie within these pages.
October 3, 2018
Believe it or not there is a point to this book. A talented, good looking guy had it all until his wife left him for another man. Obsessed with his wife and stabilised somewhat by the love for his young daughter, Jesse takes an incredible journey in a glitzy-sometimes not so glitzy-world of women and wine to make up for his loss and with the hope to find himself again. I think the book turned out to be more about the story than the point so a little somewhat let down in the conclusion. But then again, I did forget at times this was not fiction.
September 9, 2020
Like the title says, this is Jesse Fink "laid bare". He writes candidly and rawly about his divorce and his daughter, and his relationships with women after divorce. I'm not a huge fan of autobiographies, but this was a good read.
September 22, 2017
Did not enjoy it.
July 16, 2018
Took me ages to actually finish as I read others in between. Loved the style. I felt as though he was actually narrating it and I was listening. It married well with my experiences of relationships.
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